Ena-Maus @ena-maus - Tumblr Blog

If you don’t have your age in your bio or your pinned post I will block you.

Marilyn Monroe during a photo shoot conducted by photographer Richard Miller on March 6, 1946 on Santa Monica Beach in California. At that time, she was known as Norma Jeane Baker and was just starting her career as a model and actress.

worldknees

June 1, 1926... Marilyn Monroe

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PSA: AFTERCARE IS IMPORTANT

Aftercare is non-negotiable. Aftercare is essential. Aftercare is not a favor. Aftercare is not just for soft scenes. Aftercare is not something you “earn.” Aftercare is the bare minimum if someone’s taking your mind and body to their limits.

It’s what separates someone who uses you from someone who values you.

It’s what tells you: you’re safe now.

If he doesn’t give you aftercare, leave. You deserve more than just being undone. You deserve to be held after.

Why do you not like DD/LG anymore? 🥺

Honestly, it's not even just ddlg. It's like i lost interest in kind of all of my kinks...

I've realized that kinks were never the point. The point was building them with someone I felt deeply safe with. That feeling of trust was what made everything else exciting.

Right now, I crave that vanilla foundation first. I want emotional safety, friendship, affection, and genuine connection before I even think about exploring the wilder parts of myself again.

Unfortunately, I'm learning the hard way that people often hear "I'm into CNC," "DDLG," or "rough sex" and assume that means they can do whatever they want and you will just allow them too.

The past few years taught me that kink can be incredibly beautiful when it's built on love, trust, and mutual care. But without that safety, it will also break you.

There were times I let myself be pushed into sex when every part of me wanted to say no because I thought, "Well... I said I liked this before. This is just our dynamic. Can I even take it back?" Looking back, that wasn't consent it was me betraying my own body because I felt like I wasn't allowed to change my mind. I never want to be in that position again.

So it's not that I've stopped liking those kinks. It's that I've learned they only feel good when they're built on a foundation where I know I'm safe enough to say yes, no, or not today and be loved either way.

katsdom

There are a lot of important thoughts in there. Lessons learned the hard way. A kinky relationship is, first and foremost, a relationship. If the relationship isn't healthy, kink won't make it better, it will just expose the flaws.