FOR EMMA

[encb98]

wow i haven’t logged onto this in like one year, inbox me if you want my new url that i’ve been using for over a year now :-)

[encb98]

i am literally supposed to be using my new blog but i keep instinctively logging on to this one??

[encb98]

inbox me if you want the url to my new blog! :-) i won't be using this one anymore 

[lunarix]

Prague by SarahGraber

[kokohe]

[sonsuzlugaikibilet-deactivated2]

gülmek bu kadar yakışır bi insana.

[encb98]

nope nope i don't think i can do this, this is four years worth of my life plus i love my theme and my posts and nope my follower count nope can't do this but i have to 

[encb98]

i don't truly understand what is going on?? are you really gonna stop using this blog? like for ever?

wow cool i thought nobody would notice this

but yes. while i shouldn't have said certain things about other people, there are also personal things about myself on this blog that literally come from the darkest parts of my mind. everything i post shows something about me and reflects on some part of my mind. my blog is basically my thoughts made visible, and i can't deal with the idea that these things aren't only for me to see anymore. this is definitely going to be very painful for me to do, as i've had this blog for four years and i've really put a lot into it. and this is shallow, but there's also my follower count.

basically, i thought this was a blog that nobody knew about. a lot of us use tumblr as our hiding place, and it's supposed to be where we feel safe, regardless of what we choose to speak about. i'm still uncomfortable with the idea that i'm not the only one with access to these things that i post about myself. you can't control what comes and goes in your mind, and i feel so uncomfortable thinking about how there are so many things left out in the open for people to see. this is actually a dumb reference but this blog is basically a horcrux... very very nerdy on my part but that's what i feel like this blog is. so as much as it pains me to do so, i cannot continue to use this blog.

[encb98]

[pastforward-blog]

[encb98]

Ginger & Rosa, 2012

[mog-o-blog-blog]

Australian artist, Ben Quilty’s studio 2011

an inspirational work space.

[winstonpaul]

Paul McBeardy.

[encb98]

.

[mpdrolet]

Blue fence, Asbury Park, New Jersey, 1980

Joe Maloney

[seriouswapanese]

[sold--souls-blog]

The same feeling of not belonging, of futility, wherever I go: I pretend interest in what matters nothing to me, I bestir myself mechanically or out of charity, without ever being caught up, without ever being somewhere. What attracts me is elsewhere, and I don’t know what that elsewhere is.

E. M. Cioran. (via deaths-and-entrances)

[vvolare]

[socionom]

[mihsty]

i used to hate my freckles until i came onto tumblr and saw that everyone embraced them. so pictures like these make me so happy :’)