[encrisped]

2/21/18

no matter how hard you try, you won’t get me out from under your skin

[encrisped]

7/11/16

i haven’t heard from you in days and it feels like a part of me is just gone

i don’t want it to be over but this time i can’t help but feel that you’re done with me

and god, your memory is stuck to everything i have from the past year, every moment i see your face that would look up at me when your chin was propped on my stomach, your eyes that were so black i could lose myself in them. i still can’t stop thinking about the softness of your hardened hands, the way you would reach out for me in your sleep and pull me closer to your warmth, the way you told me you were stupid for not seeing the goodness of what you had in front of you

i don’t know how i’m going to survive losing you, because you were my ONE and i wasn’t yours

[encrisped]

5/9/16

i don’t remember why i removed you from my life last summer

all i remember are your disenchanted messages and unanswered questions and i remember feeling so dysphoric about the whole thing, the fact that you were so different when you were a foot away compared to the version i idealized from three thousand miles away

and now when i hear the first song you played for me it reminds me of the quiet moments in your car (which i can’t identify as uncomfortable or not) and the minute i waited for you to kiss me (which you didn’t), and i remember the cigarette smoke in your hair and the way you leaned on my shoulder while i drove you home because you were too drunk to walk

when i hear this song, god i miss the way you looked at me like i was made of amethyst or like my lips tasted like mimosa flowers, and i want you to be my transient butterfly again this summer

[encrisped]

4/26/16

i can’t get the smell of you off of my skin or out of my hair

even when you’re a hundred miles away i feel your shadow next to me and it won’t fucking go away, not even when i drown my mind in alcohol and mindless promiscuity

i can’t keep lying to myself about how badly i want you, no matter how aware i am of the fact that you are poisoning + killing me with every single kiss

[encrisped]

12/17/15

I've spent so many nights imagining that you were here with your body wrapped around mine slowly breathing onto my neck except in this fantasy you actually wanted to be there and it wasn't some sick trick and even though I've been suffering, today I was thinking about what I want my future to look like and for the first time in six months I didn't see you in it

[encrisped]

12/1/15

I feel empty without you. Repeating to myself that we will never be together only works when the sun is up but when night covers me like a satin sheet it's possible again that you can want me the way I've always wanted you

[encrisped]

11/30/15

you’re unbelievable i can’t think about you anymore without feeling my stomach drop, the feelings i have for you make me want to die and i can’t stop forgiving you for hurting me over and over and i don’t understand what i did to deserve this torture i know you care about me but you won’t stop tearing me in two and i’m too addicted to you to let you stop killing me

[encrisped]

3/27/15

i would have liked you more now if you had slept with your ex while we weren't together

[encrisped]

3/27/15

let’s face it, you liked me because i was a tragedy, you liked me because i wasn’t a meek little plaything like all the other girls you had, you liked the fire in my eyes and the knowledge that we were doing something wrong

[encrisped]

3/25/15

if you’re nice to me then i probably won’t fuck you

[encrisped]

i asked you to play this song and now every time i hear it i see you looking at me with cruel green eyes telling me about how you like the little prince and how you had anxiety in fifth grade and how you want to have a threesome before you meet someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with

[encrisped]

2/19/15

fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckcfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfc

[barefootcoyotechild]

If you leave, please stay gone.

Cc (six word story)

[encrisped]

2/7/15

i can't resist you

[encrisped]

2/2/15

you actually actually actually fucked me over this weekend

ten minutes after you told me you love me

why are you doing this to me two weeks after i said i never wanted to see you again

[encrisped]

1/19/15

i'm extremely over you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[drewwilsonphoto]

catching fireflies right after the last of the sunlight has died. then begging them to show their light. your sticky bare legs stuck to the inside of cold bed sheets. feeling the breeze through every open window course over your damp skin. you embrace it softly as each worried thought rests on it. you’re out of metaphors and similes. your thoughts fall blank after the heat has seemed to suck the life from you. you can’t force these things. you can’t rush them. being in love in summer isn’t easy. you’ll have better luck finding cool air conditioning or cold glasses of lemonade. you’ll have better luck seeing the fireflies illuminate. keep watching the ice melt in your red wine. keep tying those laces tight. keep hoping tomorrow will be cooler than tonight. 

[encrisped]

the first photo made my mind scream and it felt like my heart exploded inside my chest