Follow me into the Astral planes of consciousness, where we release all the pain that's held us imprisoned in our unconscious minds.
My mind isn't me, I am as I am. I am awakened.
I am back in control of myself, my mind is hushed and met with indifference. I am finding inner peace, I am finding the energy of life around me to be amusing and enchanting.
‘I trusted you’ with Virgil and Deceit. (Or if you wanna do even more angst, Virgil and Patton ... I am sorry. )
"I trusted you..." the words dripped slowly from Virgil's lips. The boy felt his heart fill with dread and shock.
Janus couldn't even bring himself to look into Virgil's eyes. He knew that if he would to spare a glance, he would have to face the truth that he broke Virgil's trust. He would have to acknowledge that he broke Virgil's heart.
"Look at me."
Janus kept his eyes glued onto the wall behind Virgil.
"Janus." Virgil reached out a hand to grab Deceit's chin. "Look at me!" Virgil barked with anger.
As Janus' eyes finally met the shorter boy's eyes, a nervous smirk grew on his face. Janus took Virgil's hand within his own. He leaned forward, which caused Virgil to flinch with confusion, and he pressed his lips close to Virgil's ear.
"Only a fool would fall for a deceitful person," Janus whispered into his ear before planting a small kiss on Virgil's cheek.
Janus let his hand release Virgil's then turned on his heel to walk away.
Virgil stood there staring at the taller boy walking away slowly. The clicks of the others' heels felt like drops of pressure dripping on his head.
Click. Click. Click.
"You heard that?" Virgil mumbled more to himself than anything.
Click. Click. Click.
The memory of Virgil talking about Janus to Roman played over in his head. Virgil did say that about Janus, but he made sure to explain more.
"Janus," Virgil called put firmly.
Click. Click. Click.
"Janus!" Vigril yelled.
Janus halted his steps and stood with his back to Virgil. He made no sign of turning around. Actually, he didn't want to turn around, for his frown felt forged onto his face and his eyes couldn't conceal his sadness enough.
Virgil took a step forward feeling his lips and finger tips go numb with anxiety. He swallowed the lump in his throat and tried to wet his lips, but his mouth was dry.
"Janus, you are a deceitful person," Virgil started.
Janus turn his face to the side curtly with anger from the statement.
Virgil squinted his eyes with irritation. "You are an asshole. You are cunning. You are quick witted and have a silver tongue."
Janus looked side to side with confusion. He wasn't sure why the lad was giving him an insult followed by compliments, but he stood still to listen.
Virgil continued to slowly take steps towards the other. "I have hated you from the start. I truly did..." Virgil sighed exasperly. "For fucks sake, I didn't think I would ever fall for you. Not after everything I heard you did, and not after everything you've done to me and my friends, but dammit, Janus!"
Virgil reached out and grabbed Janus' shoulders to turn him around. He made Janus look him in the eyes as he continued.
"But I can forgive all that because I know you now," Vigirl could feel his heart beat skyrocket. "I know you do care about me too, and I am so happy that you had to be the one to help me even though I didn't want you too from the start."
Janus stared deep into Virgil's eyes and could tell he was being sincere. His heart ached with fear. He knew what he would have to do.
"I love you, but" Virgil let's his hands drop from the sides of Janus' cheeks. "Why did you sabotage my audition?"
Janus couldn't hold it back and let small tears fall. He hated the way Virgil was looking at him because he knew what he did was wrong. He knew Virgil worked so hard and trusted him to make sure he'd rock that audition. He hated that he allowed himself to be so selfish.
"Because you'd leave," Janus said meekly. "And I? Well," He sniffed and wiped away some of his tears with his sleeve. "Well, I'd never get to see you again-"
"What?" Virgil interjected with confusion. "What are you talking about? I'd come back to see you!" Virgil grabbed ahold of Janus' shoulders. "You..."
"I was scared!" Janus snapped more at himself. "I never felt anything like this before, and the idea of you going away for two years killed me." Janus took a step backwards to get out of Virgil's hold. "I am stationed here, Virgil. I can't get you out of my mind majority of the day." He watched Virgil just stare. "I admit I did something wrong. I sabotaged your shot into an exclusive school that you've always wanted to go to. I messed up."
"Yeah," Virgil agreed with that last statement.
"I don't think that's something you should forgive anyone for. I am truly sorry, Virgil." Janus held Virgil's gaze.
There was a moment of silence.
Then another.
Then one more.
Finally after what felt like an eternity of staring Virgil laughed briefly.
"Wow, " Virgil chuckled with irritation. "You're such an asshole."
Janus was confused but always found Virgil's smile contagious. He chuckled himself, "Yes, those rumors ring true. I am an asshole."
Virgil softened his eyes and shook his head.
"So, this is it?" Janus smiled grimly.
"What is?" Virgil asked.
"This, " Janus motioned between both of them. "I messed things up, so I'll work on letting the judges know that I sabatoged your audtion and to allow you to audition again." Janus then sighed defeated. "Then you can pretend I never existed..."
Virgil leaned up and planted a kiss on the taller boy's cheek. "Oh, you're going to get me another audition, but-".
There's always a 'but', Janus thought.
"I'll see you tomorrow for rehearsal," Virgil then turned on his heel and walked away.
Janus watched the boy leave. He didn't stop him, but instead stared with conflicted feelings. He loved him, but he still feels immense guilt for hurting him.
But
He was happy Virgil still loved him.
----
I haven't written in forever!! I hope it was okay, I think it's cheesy. I figured I'd go a College Au where Janus is Virgil's assigned Music Tutor. Idk, just made something! I hope you enjoyed!!
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