together.

dash only //

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic​.

@ensolidarity​ said: ❝ don’t blame yourself for things that were out of your control. ❞

     Her words are calming to him, a voice he needed so many years ago has been returned to him, a gift from the God he never believed in before. Airesu found himself clutching onto her hand, his grip slowly but surely tightening. His nerves were wrecked. When they had found her in the condition she was in, it broke his heart. He had spent nearly a decade growing his strength, doing whatever he could in his power to protect his family, and even after all this time he couldn’t protect her. 

     ❝ But if I had been there, if I had kept a better eye out, this wouldn’t have happened. ❞ You wouldn’t have been taken from me if I had been better, if I had been stronger.

as he grips one hand, the other is quick to find its place on his cheek. a gentleness long held between them. a bond of tenderness, yet honesty in their own words. there was little they didn’t share with each other. there was little to hide behind a wall. he had his reasons for one secret, but her own? it was meant to protect him from worrying-- yet blew up in all the wrong ways possible.

‘  ...hm, ’ there is a shift in her gaze, followed with hefty sigh. ‘ no, had i said been honest with you, you’d have noticed her too. i didn’t think much of it, if i didn’t brush her off as just someone else trying to mess with me. to tell you would be a burden, to tell anyone else-- they’d either not care or also tell me the same, just brush it off. she counted on me not sharing a word, and i just fed right into it. ‘

[ensolidarity]

stealscars​.

     Sad bum? Did he really seem like that? If Yomo had to describe himself he wouldn’t use the term sad bum, he’d say he was dedicated, monotone, and protective. Yet when he’s drinking, he guesses he can be seen as gullible and talkative. He takes another sip, his chest warming up as the blood wine goes down. ❝Is that how you see me? ❞ 

‘   yeah, cause you aren’t like, showing me much to look at. like, thats probably all anyone sees of you when you just sit here and cry. you don’t want to be seen as one then act like it, cuz if i were her-- this ain’t a look buddy. to choose to just sit here and cry with nothing else to show for it, i'd never take back an ex if they were like this, and i know she wouldn’t neither.   ‘

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic​.

     Before she had found her way here, Airesu was occupied with dealing with the two ghouls in front of him. They were weaker than him, this he knew, but he didn’t want to cause an even bigger scene in attempts fo fight a ghoul who matched his strength. If he had known that having a kakuja would make him form a hunger for ghouls, he doesn’t think he would’ve done whatever he could to obtain it. But he had to, he needed to protect his family, it was left up to him ever since the accident. He remembers it clear as day, he was walking Kagami home after she was over for the evening, his father had gone out to hunt for them an hour before Kagami needed to start heading home. He doesn’t like thinking about that night, when he returned home dragging his father’s weakened body with him. Jiggy had fought with him, demanding he go back and kill the human girl so she wouldn’t say anything. He knew she wouldn’t say a damn thing, and she proved his thought to be true when not a single Dove came knocking on his door.

     With haste he had killed the first ghoul, and then jumped onto the next, ripping their throat out as if he were wild dog desperate for a meal. There was no denying he was hungry, and he always will be. If he wanted to stay sane, he had to eat his kind, if he wanted to protect his family, he had to eat his kind, if he wanted to survive in this world, he had to eat his own fucking kind. It was a road that wasn’t traveled by his family members, but someone had to step up to the plate and do it. Aoimoku was what they called him, the blue eyed ghoul. It was the only thing most people couldn’t forget when they saw him, vibrant hues was what drew them in, and then he snapped. The coppery taste fills his mouth, nothing could replicate the euphoria it brought him.

     He catches wiff of her, a familiar scent, one he thought he had forgotten, then he hears her footsteps, head whips around and there she stands. Instinct takes over, and he’s on top of her, his hands pinning her down by her wrists. With his mask covering his face, he’s inches away from her’s. He inhales sharply, then keeps sniffing her, moving from her hair, to her neck, to her chest, to her arms. Even after all this time she still has the same scent. Then she speaks. Words echo through his head.

     What the fuck are you doing? The statement earns her a chuckle from him. Her words are refreshing to him. A trip down memory lane that didn’t make him want to vomit.

     ❝ You still wear the same perfume you wore back in our school days. ❞

why, why couldn’t this be normal? most ghouls would have probably skewered her on spot. maybe try to scare her but, there surely was a standard practice. but, she simply can’t have things be normal, she gets one who has this need to sniff deeply into her, even just mildly laughing about her response. school days... wait, what? half of today was barely even clear in her mind, did she forget meeting someone in class? no... why would she even talk to anyone outside class... her brow furrows as her eyes shut again, trying to recall the past few day, until her eyes meet just one of his-- then, it finally clicks. had he not been holding her to the wall, she’d probably just give out. there had never been much hope of this moment-- yet that part of her refused to yield. waiting. and waiting. and each time, he never showed. the hope that had once been a bright flame reduced to smoldering cinders, yet it couldn’t fully be snuffed out. however, that hope truly prevailed-- though it’d have been a much better setting than a disgusting allyway.

‘   ...airesu? ‘

[ensolidarity]

stealscars​.

     He’s trying not to think about her, yet what Yoko had just said did nothing but fill his mind with her. He recalls the night she fought Reo, he used her, so she killed him out of anger, and everyone in the fourth ward watched in amusement and horror. ❝ A friend of mine did the same thing years ago, I stll don’t know how I feel about it. ❞ 

was he fooling anyone here? it was obvious he was here talking about shini to someone who knows her.  ‘  that’s most ghoul ladies for you. not surprised ghoul men are turning to female humans. less aggressive. but if you miss this person so much, suck it up and talk to them. gotta get closure or else you’ll never get on with your life. and i can’t have a sad bum out drinking me.  ‘

[ensolidarity]

stealscars​.

     ❝ A lot of people cry about the one who got away… ❞ Words are stated softly, he’s trying his best not to slur his words, index finger points at his glass, a signal for her to refill it. ❝ Have you ever felt like this before? ❞ 

‘  well, there was this one boy i liked, he was pretty cute, wasn’t a ghoul tho-- i went and found him with another girl-- so i just ate them both. tho’ guess that’s not the same story huh?  ‘

[ensolidarity]

@stealscars​ "Some people just spend their live in bars..."

‘  but most of the people who live at the bar don’t spend it crying about the spider that crawled away...  ‘

[ensolidarity]

a night like any other before it. school then study then work and then study. the monotonous and same thing that went down every night. it came with her long and awaited freedoms but at this point, what was there to do? any social life was crushed and snuffed out as her life revolved around her work. to maintain the long term show for her parents took every single ounce of her attention. businesses weren’t always so open, especially with ghouls hanging around-- clients don’t take the chance of being out too late, and ghouls didn’t exactly eat a hot bowl of ramen either. but the night was all she had to herself, and once she ate there was probably a bar near by-- her only pass time was in those bars. drinking it all down with a couple pints till her whole body felt warm and numb. she’d take her leave to the station and head back to her little home but one of her own choosing. one that was her own place to hide-- along side pochi of course. and she already knew that cat would be hogging the bed by now.

there was a stumble in her step as she left the comfort of the bar and into the streets. it wasn’t even a far distance, she’d done it so many times over. two rights, a left, and then another right through to the main street. nothing unique for her visits to this bar. yet, in her stupor-- her exit from the more narrow back roads seemed to never come. entering a labyrinth of streets that seemed to lead her to nowhere. some were vaguely lit, illuminated by back entrances to homes and businesses, others almost looked as though she’d peer deep into the dark abyss-- those were a no go for sure. they’d lead her nowhere and push deeper into more murky waters. yet at a three way, there was only one that remained vaguely lit enough to pass-- it looks like that was the only choice. using the wall, she steadied her gait enough to push forward to a dead end.... already hosting two occupants, and now, her as well.

a hand gripped at the throat, pressed to the same walls she had used to keep up right-- the gargled sputtering of blood as he struggled to breath. a body torn and punctured to let the blood pool beneath him. her eyes trailed up the hand that held him in place-- and all she needed was the face covering to tell her everything she needed. it was a ghoul. but her gaze now turned to the weapon in his back, her breath hitched at the dawning of realization just what she was looking at-- diagrams were one thing, but the real deal was something indescribable. yet it wasn’t even a second after her gaze shifted that the gargled gasps ceased and a dull thud echo’d in her ears. he was dead. and now? it was just the two of them. and whoever it was was already ontop of her, pushing her to the same wall. her voice failed to even register the light thud of hitting the wall or at the suddenness of him getting near her.

she wasn’t afraid. there was no point in even fighting it. what is a drunk, sheltered human woman going to do? she could barely move without getting dizzy. she simply braced herself for what would be her impedingly painful death-- he’d do it eventually... right?

as seconds past, it felt like hours-- yet nothing happened. finally, she peeked open one eye, before the other to fully look at him. he was, smelling her? almost a little too much. was it the booze? sure she was drunk but did it really smell that bad? her nose scrunched up as he just, aggressively inhaled, dry heaving, and sniffing.

‘  what the fuck are you doing ? ‘

@cannibalic​ ( airesu )

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic​.

@ensolidarity​

     It hasn’t been that long since Aka has been transferred from one of Itori’s higher end bars to Helter Skelter, it’d be no lie if he said he hated it. He missed catering to the women in the clubs who would throw themselves his way, it made hunting so much easier. All the ghouls who worked with him would send his type his way, as he would for them. A better union of staff out there. But Helter Sketler, this place was something. Did it need some kind of order for when Itori was at her other locations? Did she bring him her to disipline those who worked here? Or was it just some form of punishment for him?

     The energy here wasn’t something he was used to. There was the constant flow of ghouls coming in and out hours after closing, the idol who’d come in with the mask maker, the monotone depressed man who’d come in to get drunk to cry about a spider, the color blind ghoul who’d chaotically dance while his friend would scream the lyrics to the idol’s songs, and let’s not forget those he worked with. The box blonde ghoul who fought people with scissors, the bitchy one with the bob cut and coral blue lipstick who wouldn’t stop complaining, and her twin brother, the manager who always looked frantic and was constantly fawning over that human ( why was she always here and why was she aware of what they were? ). It wasn’t a well put together staff, it was so different from what he was used to at Itori’s club in the 8th ward. But it was something he’d had to get used to.

   ❝ What was your name again. Pogo? Yeah, Pogo. Can you give me a run through of what goes on here? ❞

the fourth ward bar was far more her place. yes she could easily go to the high end get ups in the eighth ward but, they were boring and not much fun to hang around. so she wound up always coming back to the fourth ward and helter skelter. the life that moved through it, the new and unique people that made it what it was-- homey and warm.  the atmosphere was never the same, it never grew stale and tiring. never a boring evening within the bar-- also a good place to get her buzzed. of course, when she got too wasted, he’d start giving her shots, of just fresh blood. and every single time, she would fall for it again, and again.

‘  yoko. yknow a real bartender gets ‘ta remember names. but what do you mean? people come in get drinks, leave and some just kinda hang out here. there isn’t much to get.  ‘

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic​.

     Depending on who you asked when it came to Jiggy, some would say she’s a stone-cold bitch, others would say she was a bit too protective of those she cared for, and sometimes you’d find someone and when you asked about her, they wouldn’t say a damn thing. Jiggy didn’t enjoy Kagami’s presence, at least, not at first. It was when she disappeared for so long is when Jiggy began to miss her, not because Jiggy had a connection with the former human, but because she noticed the toll it took on her brother. While she and Airesu didn’t always agree on things, he was still her brother, and the emotions she saw pour out of him during Kagami’s forced absence, well she felt what he felt. Jiggy didn’t like seeing him hurt.

     She knows why Kagami isn’t taking too kindly to her comment, given their history, it would’ve been odd for her to accept what Jiggy said. ❝ Don’t be like that. You don’t realize the shit storm you could’ve pulled us in. Before all that fuckery happened to you, having you around here, around us, it was a goddamn risk, one Airesu dragged every single of us into. You know all of here have loved and lost right? We’ve lost things because we took uncalculated risks, ones that put us and the ones we loved in danger. Kagami, you do realize what could’ve happened? Airesu started getting sloppy when you came around, leaving messes that the CCG could’ve used to track him down, they had the potential evidence to find him, to find us. You know what happens then? ❞ The anger in her voice rises with each sentence, fists balling together so tightly her fingertips turned white.

     ❝ IF THE DOVES WOULD’VE FOLLOWED THE TRACKS MY BROTHER LEFT BEHIND THEY WOULD’VE KILLED HIM WITHOUT HESITATION! THEY WOULD’VE KILLED ALL OF US! AND BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHO AND WHAT WE ALL ARE, THE FACT THAT YOU WERE HUMAN THEN WOULDN’T MEAN ANYTHING! YOU WOULD’VE BEEN CONSIDERED A TRAITOR TO YOUR OWN KIND! SENT TO PRISON TO ROT AWAY! ❞

    ❝ BUT NOW? NOW YOU’RE ONE OF US AND YEAH I DIDN’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU BACK THEN BUT I SAW HOW YOU AFFECTED AIRESU, AND I LEARNED HOW TO CARE ABOUT YOU TOO! AND NOW THAT YOU’RE ONE OF US YOU GOTTA EAT, YOU GOTTA LEARN TO USE YOUT KAGUNE SO YOU CAN FUCKING PROTECT YOURSELF SO MY BROTHER DOESN’T HAVE TO CONSTANTLY STICK OUT HIS NECK FOR THE FUCKING GUILLOTINE! ❞

‘ you know i hear you say it, it loops through my head. but eventually falls back out. every time you say it, you say it with such conviction that you truly believe what your saying. i care about you, you learned to care about me. but. it’s just not going to fool me into believing that. ‘

there was a bubbling in her heart-- one that threatened to boil over. it was not calm or warm. it was frantic and scalding. a feeling she would swallow back, forcing it down. trying to keep it from rising again. to be fed what she was told and take it as what was true. that they did this because they cared. they did this for her. if it weren’t for her, this mistake wouldn’t happen. it was her fault that things ended up this badly. had she stayed in line and did it right, it wouldn’t be your fault. it was always what you do to us.

‘  you don’t care about me, you think you do. only because when it affected someone else, it became your problem. and now you have to try and undo the mistake, if only I didn’t fuck it up. had I gotten fucked up, and didn’t affect you. you’d never care. we both know that. had it never gotten that bad, you’d say fuck it and move on. you don’t care about me, you only care for the trouble it brought you. ’

‘  you’re just as bad as they are.  ‘  

the naughty child who did something wrong, she stepped beyond her line and now they have to fix it. if only she hadn’t done that, everything would have been fine. now you have to deal with the pain, it what you get you dumb girl. you’re the one with the problems, you caused us so much misfortune, how does that make you feel ? it hurts now, but now you know not to do stupid things like we told you not to.  ‘    and i’m not going to believe the bullshit this time. i’ve been ready to take the bullet for you, for everyone if that’s what it takes. i didn’t do a damn thing wrong for you to cast the blame on me. so either drop the whole ‘i care’ or come back to me when you do.  ‘

[ensolidarity]

@cannibalic​.   "I think it's time to change your bandages."

there was a clear and audible groan. but it couldn’t be helped, could it? the sliver of hope her body would no longer feel like a lead weight-- that the constant ache that resonated deep in her body and spread itself outward would finally stop. either the outcome that she wanted would finally hit her body, or the ever present rejection that would undergo in her body would come eventually. had she had some sense of decency-- it should have never happened in the first place. her body pushed itself up, but the urge to stretch was pushed back-- no it’d hurt too much still. it’d cause the small spotting of blood on the gauze again.

‘ does it have to be this early? ‘

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic​.

      Bam Bam finds it weird how she can sit with him comfortably, or even sit with anyone else without issue. Wasn’t there ever the fear that someone would turn when she seemed at ease and her life would be taken? Was there ever the thought that Airesu would come back craving something more from her? Maybe he should stop letting his mind wander so far out, if anyone wanted to eat her, it would’ve already happened. But what about the thought that the Doves would get her and execute her for harboring a ghoul? Only time will tell.

     ❝ A lot of ghoul kids don’t have parents, it won’t be stealin’ if you take one of the streets. ❞

‘  but they would have no reason to trust me, humans are the reason a lot of ghouls have no parents, right?  ‘

there was little to argue on that front. it was humans that caused them to be alone. and it was humans who didn’t care-- there was a pest problem in the garden. no matter how old, they were condemned to death from day one. yet,  humans killed ghoul kids more than ghouls kill human kids. how could anyone just blindly agree that each and every single ghoul deserved to die? people weren’t so blindly executed for accidentally killing someone, they weren’t killed if they were forced to kill someone. so how was this any different?  even voicing such a sympathy for the ruthless bloodthirsty killers was enough to get ostracized for-- helping one? it could be a death sentence.  ‘  besides, i’m not a ghoul. i doubt i could even begin to feel like i could raise one. as similar as we are, the way we’re raised isn’t. the way i was raised, wasn’t even the normal. so i don’t think i’d even raise a human kid right. ‘

[ensolidarity]

[ensolidarity]

reteeth‌.

     Saiko… Saiko knows about sex? Just the thought of someone who seemed so innocent knowing about eating ass of all things, well, it shocked him ( she’s played Pact with a Witch, hasn’t she? )  ❝ You can drink ass, if it’s swampy, but that’s too gross… even for me. ❞

     ❝ But uh, I left this cup of Dew out, and it got flat like Urie’s ass. ❞ Correction: Urie’s ass is toned, not flat. 

‘  the bar is too low... ‘

‘  but why are you staring at his ass this much to know it’s that flat-- ?  ‘

[ensolidarity]

reteeth‌.

OPEN.

     ❝ This Mountain Dew is flatter than Urie’s ass. ❞ He’s still going to drink it though.

‘  you’re suppose to eat ass, not drink it.  ‘

[ensolidarity]

@cannibalic​

[ensolidarity]

cannibalic‌.

     He’s confused as to why she wasn’t a meal, he had been told he couldn't eat her, and that’s not something he liked. Bam Bam wasn’t a fan of humans, especially Doves. They took his old family, yet his new family was one which he loved, yet not as much as his previous one. It’s no lie that he misses his mother, he misses her tenderly. 

     Bam Bam doesn’t speak much, so for him to ask such a question proved that he was highly interested in the woman before him. While her scent was mainly human, there was the lingering scent of a ghoul on her ( must be Airesu ), but it’s not the kind of scent you catch from someone from just hugging them. Kagami smells of Airesu the way Ginji smells of Kusari. Bam Bam knew what happened between them while they were tangled together under silk sheets, he’s walked in on Ginji and Kusari a couple times, only for Kusari’s hollering to summon Oda who’d quickly shut the door and lecture Bam Bam about knocking ( but he did knock and when he heard Ginji scream ❝ COME INSIDE! ❞ he thought it meant to walk into the room ), and he understood that that act alone is what caused their scents on each other to be so strong.

      ❝ If you want a kid, are you gonna steal one? ❞

it wasn’t the first time people wondered about her status-- if she wasn’t a meal, why was she even here? in most cases, she’d elect to ignore them and move on. it got tiring to justify being there when it was quite simple. she was friend’s with airesu. he left school without a word. they grew up. he tried to eat her. they remet and from there things picked up almost as if where they’d left off. which escalated to more, much more, far quickly than at first thought. however what happened under the sheets wasn’t quite their shtick of intimacy anyways. when it came down to it-- it didn’t mean all that much to either of them. 

‘ no, we won’t steal kids. besides i don’t think either of us are sort of in the right place for kids. so haven’t talked about this stuff much. but even if we do, we’re not going to just steal kids. ‘

[paintsspeeling]