Celebrating our third birthday with a schokotorte with hazelnut praline
In a break from tradition, I am writing the blogâs birthday post this year instead of Amber, who did a beyond spectacular job last time around. There are no announcements to make this year, but a lot to share about where life has taken us this past year, what we have learned and the things we hope to do in the new one. 2015 was a year of change, and the blog was among the first things that had to bear the brunt of our scattered attention, busy schedules and less-than-happy moods.
Amber and I got married in February, and the run up to it was one of the most emotionally draining experiences of our lives (that we posted exactly once in the first couple of months of the year is testament to that). We went through months of living hell. To fight tooth and nail with those you love to get them to respect you and your beliefs is something I wonât wish on anyone. It put us in difficult, often no-win situations, and Amber and I probably learned more about each other this way, than we would have if everything had gone smoothly. We know now that we are willing to try everything to solve a hard problemâwe went as far as using statistics to see which of our many solutions would make the least number of people unhappy! We learned that we were brave enough to stand up for our convictions, whether it was about the inherent sexism in Hindu wedding rituals; or the needless expenditure that goes into weddings that have, quite frankly, become monstrosities; or even keeping our wedding private and not make it into a social media extravaganza. We got married under the Special Marriage Act, there were no religious rituals and I wore no marks of a married woman (and donât plan to ever, either). We didnât spend a bomb buying clothes that we would only ever wear to one party. I was practically a FabIndia bride, and I am proud of that! A few weeks before the wedding, we found ourselves in a Tanishq showroom surveying the jewelry I was expected to buy, and then wear. We had convinced ourselves that it is money we have, so why not spend it on this? If nothing else, I would feel less worked up every time we had to attend a wedding and found myself not owning the baubles that would magically transform me into a christmas tree. Iâm so grateful that we talked ourselves out of this more successfully than we had talked ourselves into it. Because, really, we would much rather spend that money and the money that goes into throwing a party for a thousand people in filling our home with books and our kitchen with better equipment. If there was one thing that made all the pain worth it, it was that we tried our absolute best not to compromise who we are.
As if all of this wasnât enough, Amber and I both made big changes to our work lives in 2015. I went back to working full-time again, in an attempt to not become stagnant and do all the things I love to do, and not just a few. There was more administrative tasks to tend to as I expanded my practice, new skills to learn and become better at managing my time and communicating with clients and collaborators. Amber went a step further than me. He quit his job, figured out what he would rather to do and went back to work doing something he likes. And even though this has meant starting from scratch, he has worked tirelessly, complained little and inspired me much more than he knows.
We know it sounds pompous (and far too much like the United Nations), but Amber and I like to dedicate every new year to a goal. Much better than a resolution, we think. Next year is the Year of Health, both mental and physical. As you can imagine, 2015 was probably not a good one for either. And making time to do the things we love, the things that help us find balance and happiness, is right up there on the agenda, and therefore so is this blog. Given how little we have posted this year, it is hard to believe that we have cooked and baked more and better this year. And to keep that going, we are planning a special project around Indian food that we hope to share with you soon. We are practicing old skills and mastering new ones. We are learning more about culinary cultures we are ignorant about. We are understanding the science behind cooking and baking better. From now on, expect the recipes that go up on this blog to push you more, because we are upping the ante in our kitchen!
(In the picture at the top of this post is the schokotorte with hazelnut praline we baked to celebrate the blogâs third birthday. The recipe will be on the blog soon!)