Erti

she/they | speedrunner, EDH/cEDH enjoyer, speedcuber, and programmer | 17

[ertizoel]

howdy hey and hi there hello!

My name is Erti. I'm seventeen years old and lowkey pretty chill

My DMs are open! You have a joke or want someone to talk to about your interests, your day, or just random bullshit? Hit me up, I love making friends. You can also add me on discord, I go by ertizoel on there, as well as on basically every platform.

Puzzles my beloved. I learned how to solve a rubiks cube just over three years ago. Little fun fact about me: I was in res when I learned, so I didn't have access to the internet. I found my own method to solve it! It wasn't great and I'm still trying to shake bad habits from it, but oh well. I've been grinding 2x2 a lot over the past few months, I'm currently averaging between four and five hundred solves per day, and yet I still haven't gotten sub 1 second.

Puzzles I know how to solve:

2x2, 3x3, 4x4, 5x5, 6x6, 7x7, 8x8, 9x9, Ghost, Mirror, Puppet v1, Megaminx, Windmill, Pyraminx, Skewb, 3x3x1, 2x2x4, 3x2, Fisher

Puzzles I'm currently learning:

Square 1, FTO

PB List:

PB list: 2x2: 1.23 [CLL] 3x3: 22.49 [CFOP] 4x4: 1:28.26 [Redux] 5x5: 2:36.52 [Redux] Pyra: 6.05 [LBL] Skewb: 11.09 [SBM]

This is not exhaustive, only PBs of solves I timed and had properly generated scrambles. I do not count hand scrambles towards PBs.

I play a lot of video games. I don't play much neon white anymore, but I peaked at top 647th globally and currently hold 14th place for new game any% on src, although it is a pretty small category.

Currently about 45% through my second save file for TBOI, I have one that I got dead god on in only 500 hours (i hear that's pretty good for someones first playthrough)

Really into Balatro lately :D

I like Magic the Gathering. I started playing in October 2025 and it has been an absolute blast. I've been getting into CEDH which is awesome!

Idk what else to put in an intro post honestly, if you want to learn more about me, read my blog ig

also toastie thinks i'm kind of funny and she's never wrong ever so if you don't think i'm funny, you're wrong

[ertizoel]

if one more person replies to one of my class discussion posts with "I liked how you said '[exactly what I said]' and add nothing else, i'm going to skin someone

like come on i put a lot of thought and effort into these, the least you can do is not just repeat the initial claim I make in my initial paragraph and call it a day

[ertizoel]

wore a gown and heels to cEDH night cuz why not and was turning heads at the mall

[ertizoel]

also bro I have been sleeping on heels these things make you feel like such a bitch

[ertizoel]

wore a gown and heels to cEDH night cuz why not and was turning heads at the mall

[ertizoel]

if I had a nickel for every time my dog has somehow managed to tie a knot in a blanket around herself and panicked, id have two nickels, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice

[sharkwithpaws]

i wish it was socially acceptable to reply with ":3" to people you know irl

[ertizoel]

wait that's not socially acceptable?

fuck

[110budd]

I hate that my mutuals are sad right now. I wish I could take away all of the horrors of life for every one of them

[ertizoel]

if I could take all of my friends pain off their shoulders and bear it myself, I would. Physical and mental. I don't care, I hate seeing my friends suffer. Hit me full force, I can take it

[ertizoel]

my fortune cookie had no fortune :(

[ertizoel]

just found out I have a comment on a youtube video with 17k likes chat do I do the thing and edit it to talk about how this is the most insane thing that's ever happened to me and how grateful I am

[ertizoel]

watching a video, i checked the comments and apparently i watched it a few years ago. i wonder why past erti did that

also it seems that i liked my own comment so there's that as well

[ertizoel]

erti: one

gopher: zero

[weirdo-offical]

can i adopt you

idk

im gonna have so many parents

ask @zeta-finnish

[ertizoel]

let's turn them into grandparents:

will you adopt me?

[ertizoel]

im gonna find a server like neon bar but for ultrakill

imagine if the owner (a top runner in the community) decides to retire and they ask for someone to take over the server, and I, as a joke, say i will, then it turns out no one else volunteered

then i could have a really funny "if i had a nickel, id have two nickels" joke

speaking of, does anyone know of a small-ish ultrakill speedrunning community open to new players?

[ertizoel]

reblog with things you want me to write on my wall, and I'll write it on my wall

please note that I have arthritis so if it's super long, I'll write until my wrist hurts and then I'll stop.

I reserve the right to censor/veto as I see fit

with that in mind, go wild

[apoororphanboy]

I am amazing and beautiful <3

[ertizoel]

[ertizoel]

good news guys, turns out daniel naroditsky is still alive!

thanks google for doing everything you can to provide us with accurate, updated information!

[ertizoel]

a series of events from work last night, told in the style of greentext

>old guy in a cowboy hat and red tinted glasses comes in

>I take his order

>he asks for an order of onion rings

>I repeat that to him

>he says "no, I want *onion rings* instead of fries"

>just nod and say "oh alright my bad."

>he replies "yes, that's your bad"

>what the fuck man

>Then he wants a shake

>Malt and chocolate (will be important later)

>i ask coworker (she's hispanic) to start making the shake

>he says he wants it to eat here

>ring him up

>go to give him his drink

>he says "no I got a shake"

>I say "yes, but your meal comes with a drink"

>he very slowly puts his hands on the counter and says "why would I want a *drink*..." he slowly moves his hands over to another part of the counter "with my *shake*"

>idk it says in very big bright red letters on our menu that everything comes with fries and a drink, and clearly you read that because you knew you were able to upgrade said fries to onion rings

>just nod

>he goes and sits down

>about two minutes pass

>coworker comes up to me and informs me we're out of malt

>I ask if she wants to tell him because he's already been rude to me and thinks I'm stupid

>she says "nah, let's just not give him it if he's been a dick. he probably won't notice anyway"

>she brings him the shake

>he comes up to the counter

>he says "I think that [word I won't repeat] messed up my shake, there's no malt"

>I tell him "there's no need to be a dick about it man"

>bro squints at me and says "what did you just say"

>I take the first shake and say "I'll go remake this"

>change literally nothing

>put it into new cup and run the shake machine for a few seconds so he can hear it "mixing"

>bring it back out

>he tries it

>"good, they got someone who can actually do it right"

>what the fuck is that supposed to mean

>I'm thoroughly pissed off now

>our cook finishes his burger while I explain what happened to my coworkers (I'm the only white person on shift, literally *everyone* else was hispanic)

>everyone's mad at him now

>we go light on his onion rings because fuck you

>I bring him his food

>food is in a to-go back

>politely ask him to leave

>he says "what?"

>less politely ask him to leave

>he says "no I want to eat here"

>I straight up tell him "get the fuck out"

>he says "excuse me????" (yes that number of questions marks is necessary)

>"I said get the fuck out. you're making the staff uncomfortable and you've been a dick this entire time. leave" (uncomfortable is a nice word, it was more of a feeling of disdain and hatred)

>"oh, the [word I won't repeat]s are mad at me?" and then he does actually leave

>I go on break to cool down because I'm quite angry

>the end

[burnttoast7272]

you can literally stalk me (ON TUMBLR) who cares. go on. my digital footprint is cooked anyways

[ertizoel]

I have paid the cleave cost to remove the words in the brackets. watch your back