A study on one Yokozawa Takafumi
Okay, buckle up guys cause I’ve been wanting to do this for MONTHS and now is the time and it’s gonna be a long post. It’s time to talk about my sweet baby angel Yokozawa.
As some of you may have figured out already, Yokozawa is my favorite character in the SiH/JR universe. Tbh, he’s my favorite character PERIOD. I mean, look at him :
He’s gorgeous. I could look at him all day long. So what follows is a bunch of observations and theories (that are obviously 100% totally true, as they are mine) that revolve around the character of Yokozawa Takafumi.
We don’t really know much about Yokozawa’s personal life before his first appearance in SiH. We know of his relationship with Takano and their time together in college, but we know nothing of his past that DOESN’T involve Takano. We do have glimpses of informations, like the fact that his parents worked late when he was a child and so he had to learn how to cook and take care of himself and that they might be bugging him about getting married, but it’s always given out in 1 short sentence in the novels with absolutely no details, which makes this statements difficult to fully understand. (for example, it isn’t explicited if he has siblings, tho he probably doesn’t, or when exactly did his parents talk to him about getting married, which means that he COULD have siblings and that his last interaction with his parents COULD be from a couple of weeks to several months before we hear of it, maybe even more than a year). We also learn in an EXTRA (like you gave him 6 novels but you put THAT in an EXTRA, NAKAMURA?!?) that his scowl comes from waaaaaayyyyyyy back into his childhood since he’s been scowling in pictures since he was a child, something that he didn’t realize himself until he saw said-pictures again as an adult.
From his first appearance, what we understand about him is that he’s cold, aggressive, loud and work-focused. In fact, it is implied that it’s what many of his coworkers see in him since they nicknamed him the “Wild Bear” of Sales. His personnality and reputation are so bad at the start of SiH that most of them fear him, and the only coworkers with whom he seems to get along with, outside of Takano, are Henmi (which is honetsly only due to Henmi being a cinnamon roll), Hatori (but it’s more about mutual respect than friendship) and Yukina (who’s not even working at Marukawa and whom he only sees from time to time). He does have cordial relationships with other people, but it’s mostly people who don’t interact much with him or who are unrelated to his own work.
To summarize, he’s a grumpy asshole with no friends (except Takano but we all know it’s basically like having no friends at all) (sorry Takano kinnies, i love him too but you know I’m right) And we, readers, are expected to hate him with all our heart.
Then, this happens:
And from then on, Yokozawa is revealed to be so much more than what we thought we knew. The next time we see him in SiH, he’s “back to normal” and tells Ritsu that at the first occasion, he’ll steal Takano back. Thanks to the Yokozawa Takafumi no Baii novels (or YTnB), we understand that he doesn’t really think what he’s saying as he has finally fully realized that he could never have Takano. What he said then was a way for himself to not lose face in front of the man who beat him, who won Takano even though he’s done nothing for it, unlike Yokozawa who had been trying to get Takano for several years. It’s self-preservation, and in the end, it may be more of an act for himself than against Ritsu. In other words, he’s officially giving up but without admitting his defeat, at least out loud. The worst part is probably that he had known for a long time he could never have Takano, but just couldn’t let go. It doesn’t really work for him tho, because he still feels all the sadness, sourness and disappointment that comes with being rejected for someone else. And of course, since he is very prideful, you can add shame to the mix. Then, the final strike: there’s no one for him at this moment. Takano is more or less his only friend, and in this situation there’s no way he can seek comfort from him. His family? Well, assuming he doesn’t have any sibling, it’s only his parents, and from how much we hear about them (NEVER LMAOOOOO, they’re mentionned 2-3 times in total thoughout the 6 novels and have 0 influence on the plot at any time. Compared to that, Hiyori’s grandparents from her mother’s side are like main characters lmao), he doesn’t seem particularly close with them, so they’re out.
By the way, there’s something really bothering me that I want to share. In the 4th novel, Yokozawa reveals to the Kirishimas that his birthday was actually 2 days after Kirishima’s but that he FORGOT about it until way after it had passed. He also says that it doesn’t really matter because it’s not important and he usually doesn’t celebrate it anyway. The problem is: as a parent, wouldn’t you, at least, call your child to wish them a happy birthday? Because, if Yokozawa forgot his birthday until AFTER it had passed, it means that NO ONE wished him a happy birthday, or he would have remembered. Therefore, his parents didn’t even call to wish him a happy birthday. His own parents to whom he is -supposedly- an only child. From that, we can extrapolate. If they don’t call him for his birthday, they probably don’t call much at all, right? Now, add to that information that Takano, his only real friend, never calls him by his given name, and that of course no one else does since they’re not close with Yokozawa. The only people who might call him by his given name are his family. His parents. Do you see my point?
This man has very probably not been called by his given name in months. Your given name gives you individuality. Your family name is something you share with other people but your given name identifies you as an individual among your family. I’m telling you, my boy has been called “Yokozawa” for so long that it’s basically how he identifies himself. (hell, I bet he refers to himself as “Yokozawa” instead of “Takafumi”) And I think that this theory is supported by the fact that he doesn’t like being called “Takafumi” by Kirishima, even after months of dating. It’s like he’s not a person anymore. He doesn’t have anything he’s passionae about, he’s an entity that fulfils a role. Takano’s best friend. The Wild Bear of Sales. Ritsu’s rival. He’s never allowed to be just “Takafumi”. And when he “loses” the only person he was actually close to, his world collapses, because he doesn’t have anything else in his private life, which is why he turns to work and focuses on that afterwards. Yokozawa is an incredibly lonely character. He feels alone but his pride and self-deprecative tendencies (let’s remember that he expressed multiple times that he doesn’t understand how Kirishima can be attracted to him and keeps questioning his place in the Kirishimas’ household) don’t allow him to realize it. He doesn’t have anybody, he knows it, he ignores it. But it doesn’t take the pain away, and so he falls into a spiral of self-hate and depression.
It could have ended like that, but then Kirishima forced his way into the picture. That night in the bar, Kirishima is faced with something he (and probably nobody else, honestly) has never seen before: Yokozawa giving out fully to his true feelings. When Takano confronted him, Yokozawa lashed out but he maintained some control over himself, enough to not let Takano see how deeply crushed Yokozawa really was. But with all the despair and alcohol inside him, Yokozawa showed everything he usually never showed to anyone else: his desperation, his love, his tears… And it’s basically the moment Kirishima decided “yep, I’m gonna take care of this guy”, because he SAW, at that moment, Yokozawa’s true heart, his naivete when it comes to love, how deeply he can love and how far he would go for the people he holds dear. Kirishima was facing the guy half Marukawa thinks is an absolute asshole, and realized there was so much more to him than anything he could have imagine. So of course, he started to wonder what other sides of Yokozawa he could discover. And thanks to him, we, the reader, got to see those sides too.
Yokozawa is actually very sweet and sincere. He’s grumpy, yes, and he clearly doesn’t know how to handle his emotions (as if no one ever teached him how to, mmmmmmmmhhhhh, I WONDER), but it’s just the hard exterior that he put up for so long that it basically became his natural state. The truth is revealed about the former n°1 enemy of the fandom: he’s good with animals and kids (because, surprise, he’s actually a big softie with heart of gold), he likes to cook, he enjoys reading when he has time, he actually really appreciates Henmi despite scolding him all the time, he’s shy when it comes to intimacy, etc… We discover a man who is stubborn and irritable because he’s very dedicated to everything he has responsability over (like the parent race at Hiyori school, my boy TRAINED for WEEKS so he would do his best for a little girl he had known for a couple of months at best, god); he acts clingy at times because he when he loves, he loves hard and fully; he’s bad at sharing his feelings because he has a lot of insecurities and self-doubt (like, every novel he’s ready to leave the Kirishimas the moment they want him out of their lives, even though he acknowledges to himself that it would probably destroy him. like, baby, wtf?). And despite all that, he always does his best to do the right thing. He doesn’t sulk and indulge into his flawed behaviour. When he fucks up, he apologizes and does his best to make up for it (except with Onodera but nobody’s perfect lmao), and even though he’s unsure about his future with the Kirishimas, he gives them everything he has. And for the first time (again, sorry Takano kinnies), he’s given back just as much.
Hiyori is obviously perfect, she’s the best, I love her. But his relationship with Kirishima is what really allows Yokozawa to reveal everything he has in him. - I said I’d accept you unconditionally—you don’t have to change one bit. “ That statement is, in my opinion, the exact thing that makes their relationship work and the proof that Kirishima is the ideal partner for Yokozawa. Kirishima acknowledges Yokozawa’s flaws later in the scene, making it clear that he’s not blind of them and that he knows what he’s getting himself into by being Yokozawa’s lover. And saying loud and clear that he knows about them and is willing to accept Yokozawa, not despite those flaws, but WITH them, he’s basically giving Yokozawa exactly what he needs. Yokozawa is aware of his flaws and that he pushes other people away with his shitty behaviour, but no one ever gave him the opportunity to grow and change in order for him to become a better person. Deep down, he’s an amazing guy, but no one before has ever been willing to wait long enough to see it. When Kirishima says this sentence, I don’t think he’s refering to Yokozawa’s behaviour towards himself because of course that he wants Yokozawa to act differently with him after they become lovers, like being lovey-dovey and more laid-back around him. I think he’s telling Yokozawa “I know who you are deep down, I see you, and I’ll take it with everything it goes with without hesitation”, and that’s precisely what Yokozawa needs: to be loved for who he truly is, and to be given the time to change the way he behaves without being rushed or judged. The proof of this is that, Yokozawa DOES change in the course of the novels. He’s less grumpy and angry and stressed, but also more confident and relaxed and able to solve problems with calmness and communication. And those changes all come from his desire to be a better person for the people and to be able to support people around himself. He doesn’t change to please Kirishima; he changes because he’s wanted to change things about him for a long time and Kirishima offered him the opportunity and the support he needed to make those changes in himself. I think Kirishima being a father really helps here, because he’s a good father, which means he has learned to be patient and understanding and to leave others the space to grow, just like he does with Hiyori. So, yeah, he’s right when he says that having a child is “a plus” for his relationship with Yokozawa, because it gave him the tools to be the partner Yokozawa needed and deserved. On a personnal note, I think I fell in love with Yokozawa because I used to feel a similar type of loneliness and that horrible feeling that you could technically do something but you still somehow can’t manage to actually do it, and you feel horrible about yourself. But by loving him, I learned to love and forgive that part of myself. Because I saw this part of myself in him, I realized that it does not make me horrible or pathetic or disgusting. It’s humane, it’s hard, and it should be handled with support and kindness, not disdain and disgust. So, thank you my grumpy bear boy for allowing me to accept all this, I love you <3
