♱

Oh, you don't know it yet, but baby, I've already got your heart.

[etrnalcemetery]

ー 𓆩 𓆪 ー

𝕳𝖊𝖗𝖊 𝖑𝖎𝖊𝖘..

♰ 。。 『 𝕾ei 』 ₊˚. . ༄ sixteen ִֶָ . ָ࣪

↳ main blog: @seseimetery

˖ ࣪⭑ 𝕳e ／ 𝕬ny † ♡ † 𝕬ro

‧₊˚ 𝖄an 𝕿ypesー 359 5 xams cdea wscvo ‧ ˚₊

♱ I welcome question and will respond as best I can, though I can be indecisive and occasionally unclear.

♱ block if you're uncomfortable. no dni, i don't restrict who interacts with me or my posts. I will block you if I want to. …⁠ᘛ⁠⁐̤⁠ᕐ⁠ᐷ

[etrnalcemetery]

I'm honestly too scared to interact nore than this because I don't have an interesting blog and i don't want you to think I'm boring

Don’t be scared. I won’t judge you for that, it’s not like mine is any better anyway, haha.

[etrnalcemetery]

Well , at least I can tell I'm still gullible as always with you . What is quite embarassing :')

No worries, it’s really not. I don’t mind the number of asks you sent at all. And yeah, you’re right, it was morning when you sent that ask ding ding ding. But it isn’t anymore, though ig it's morning for you, so good morning anyway. What made you want to talk to me again?

[etrnalcemetery]

I don't know why it stung how you couldn't understand it's me , since I dropped no hints , but without wanting to say my name , I'm someone that used to text you a lot , and I had feelings for you

I knew who you are, I just wanted to make sure. haha

[etrnalcemetery]

I'm deleting the blog i sent about, if you're ever interested, just answer one of the asks nd ill probs see it eventually

and who are you?

[etrnalcemetery]

soo..... are u gonna talk about the thing w your ex or what? idek if ur still active here but i wanna know ur side too

Thanks for asking, anon.

‎I never pretended to be a guy, I genuinely identified as one. I had felt that way since I was a pre-teen, and it was only during our relationship that I started realizing things were more complicated for me. The more comfortable I became with him, the more I understood that part of why I wanted to be a guy was because I hated how people perceived me as a girl. ‎I continuously suppressed and hid anything about me that was remotely feminine. I still don’t fully understand my gender identity even until now, idc what I'm called. This is more personal and I won't elaborate on this any further.

‎I also didn’t cheat. A couple days after we broke up, I put in my Twitter bio that I was “someone’s girl,” but it was referring to a video game character. When he later accused me of cheating, I explained that to him, but he said he didn’t want to hear my explanation anymore, so I dropped it and assumed the misunderstanding would pass.

‎As for the accusation that I fetishized BL, that’s simply not true. I enjoy all kinds of romance media: MLM, WLW, and heterosexual. Back when I identified as male, it made sense that I connected more with MLM media because I was a guy who liked other guys at the time.

‎I’ll admit that I became avoidant in the relationship, but I wasn’t like that in the beginning. Around four or six months in, my feelings started fading, and that was when I first tried to break up with him. At the time, I couldn’t properly explain what I was feeling because I didn’t even recognize it myself. He convinced me that I was just struggling mentally, and since it was my first real relationship, I believed him. Looking back now, I realize I was simply losing feelings. I tried to break up with him multiple times because of that, but he would always beg me not to leave. I felt guilty because he often told me he would hurt himself if I did so I stayed.

‎We also weren’t some slow-burn relationship. We had only known each other for about two and a half months before I committed because I was infatuated. In hindsight, that was another mistake on my part because I barely knew him beyond surface level when we first got together.

‎The reason I lost feelings had nothing to do with him being “yandere” or overly possessive. Our personalities and preferences just didn’t work together. Honestly, I didn’t even mind his possessive or jealous side, sometimes I even encouraged it because I liked it.

‎I also don’t understand why things said during arguments are suddenly being brought up now. We both said hurtful things to each other when we fought. At one point, after I opened up about inappropriate things my grandfather did to me as a child, he joked that I should “go get touched by my grandpa.” Later, he explained why he said it and apologized, and I forgave him. I never brought it up again until now. That also wasn’t the only hurtful thing he ever said to me, but I always chose to forgive him and try to understand him because neither of us were mentally okay at the time. He forgave me for hurtful things I said too and reassured me that it was okay, so I don’t understand why those things are suddenly being used against me now.

‎He also left out important context about our breakup. That week, I was extremely busy with school, but I still made an effort to update him about my day and reply whenever I could. After everything calmed down, we finally got to call again, and I was genuinely excited to talk to him. I told him about the things I had accomplished and showed him a performance I was proud of from a school play. Instead of being happy for me, he became upset and started comparing himself to me, which was something he did often. That hurt and embarrassed me because I had been excited to share something important to me.

‎That was my last straw. If I no longer felt comfort, happiness, or emotional safety in the relationship, then I didn’t see a reason to stay. I had already told him multiple times before that breaking up might be healthier for both of us, but he never wanted to hear it. Leaving wasn’t only for myself, it was for him too, even if he was against the idea. I don’t think anyone wants to be with someone who no longer feels comfortable in the relationship.

‎tldr; im not and didn't pretend to be male, im not a cheater, im not a "fake yandere" but yeah, I was avoidant during the last months in our relationship.

[etrnalcemetery]

I will never forget about that weird anon

which anon and what did they do?

[etrnalcemetery]

When I lack the courage to say I need you, my heart whispers what my lips cannot. It doesn't simply beat, it cries out, louder than any word i could ever speak. My heart never lies, whether it's about how much I miss you or how deeply I love you. Every beat calls for you. Every beat is yours.

[etrnalcemetery]

waving...

-🦷

waves back.. helloo again!

[etrnalcemetery]

When I said I wanted to strangle you, I was flirting.

I figured.

[etrnalcemetery]

I want to violently strangle you

What. Try me.

[etrnalcemetery]

Goodluck on your pregnancy grandpa!

-🥩

Yeah.. thanks............

[etrnalcemetery]

Jesus is watching

That'll be me

[etrnalcemetery]

ur most recent post abt the stars randomly showed up in my tags n damn. that was beauiful fr

I appreciate that, thank you.

[etrnalcemetery]

That night, the stars grew envious, wondering why my eyes weren’t fixed on them. But when they saw they were resting on you instead, they understood, then fell in love with you too.

[etrnalcemetery]

My heart isn't that big, but something else is

Your wonderful brain

[etrnalcemetery]

Bigggggg

Heart🫀