f: ℤ-->ℤ | {f(n+m) - f(m) - f(n): n, m ∈ ℤ}

dance like nobody's watching | love like you've never been hurt | run like something is chasing you

[kafkaesque-world]

Please — consider me a dream.

Franz Kafka; ‘Once while visiting his friend Max Brod, young Kafka awakened Brod’s father, who was asleep on a couch. Instead of apologizing, Kafka gently montioned him to relax, advanced through the room on tiptoe, and said softly: “Please – consider me a dream.”’ from Franz Kafka (Franz Baumer) (via auroses)

[iffii]

mathematicians have a very weird standard for use of the term “well-known”

[shadowpeoplearejerks]

This is the most correct post about mathematicians I have ever seen. 

[eudoxus-writes]

[unfollower-deactivated20260220]

I emailed my professor that I needed an extension on a paper bc I have the flu and she just responded with “do not fret.” and nothing else. what does this mean

[eudoxus-writes]

[exquisite-grandeur]

“There is a stranger outside your house. He is old, ragged, and dirty. He is tired. He has been wandering, homeless, for a long time, perhaps many years. Invite him inside. You do not know his name. He may be a thief. He may be a murderer. He may be a good. He may remind you of your husband, your father, or yourself. Do not ask questions. Wait. Let him sit on a comfortable chair and warm himself beside your fire. Bring him some food, the best you have, and a cup of wine. Let him eat and drink until he is satisfied. Be patient. When he is finished, he will tell his story. Listen carefully. It may not be as you expect.”

— from the end of Emily Wilson’s Translator’s Note to the Odyssey (via aboutbirds)

[eudoxus-writes]

[orwell]

Edward Gorey

[eudoxus-writes]

[lettherebedragons]

This is a very specific vague.

[eudoxus-writes]

[eudoxus-writes]

Have you tried telling her to stop crying unless she has an actual problem?

I just tried. She said “ABAWABBAWAA” and then started crying again.

If anyone knows how to fix ABAWABBAWAA, please let me know.

[treestoclouds]

Try dangling her upside down by the ankles.

[radio-strawberry]

My baby cousin really liked sitting in his car seat on top of the dryer when it was going. Something about the vibrations. Make sure to watch her though.

[eudoxus-writes]

Thank you for the suggestions!

She didn’t like the dryer but it turns out she loves sitting in front of the washer (we have a front-loader with a clear door) and watching the clothes spin. So she’s doing that now.

[thecraftychemist]

What to say instead of "trivially"

This comes from a very long list of alternative phrases and words that was used to create “a program that will insert condescending adverbial phrases before any statement in a math proof”. But use it where you will - I’m sure other fields can benefit. Tag yourself, I’m “By abstract nonsense“.

By circular reasoning we see that 

There is a marvellous proof (which is too long to write here) that 

Figure 2 (not shown here) makes it clear that 

It is beyond the scope of this course to prove that

Only idealogues and sycophants would debate whether

The Math Gods demand that

For legal reasons I am required to disclose that

Remember the basic laws of common sense: 

Life is too short to prove that

All the cool kids know that

Wherefore said He unto them,

With God as my witness,

As a great man once told me,

Galois died in order to show us that

It pleases the symmetry of the world that

Mama always told me

By Euler

By Fermat 

I know it, you know it, everybody knows that

You of all people should realize that

The proof is left to the reader that 

We need not waste ink in proving that 

It would be an insult to my time and yours to prove that

I shudder to think of the poor soul who denies that 

We don’t want to deprive the reader of the joy of discovering for themselves why,  

Barring causality breakdown, clearly 

Through the careful use of common sense,

According to prophecy,

This won’t be on the test, but 

When one stares at the equations they immediately rearrange themselves to show that

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a thousand times,

Our forefathers built this country on the proposition that

By abstract nonsense,

My father told me, and his father before that, and his before that, that

The burden of proof is on my opponents to disprove that

The voices insist that 

Assuming an arbitrary alignment of planets, astrology tells us

[eudoxus-writes]

[thewriterkb]

Spurious Correlations by Tyler Vigen.

These charts were made to depict that correlation does not always equal causation, showing that although statistics always arise, they aren’t always necessarily useful. 

[eudoxus-writes]

[eudoxus-writes]

Have you tried telling her to stop crying unless she has an actual problem?

I just tried. She said “ABAWABBAWAA” and then started crying again.

If anyone knows how to fix ABAWABBAWAA, please let me know.

[eudoxus-writes]

H is crying again and I don’t know why.

Maybe she’s bored? Do babies get bored?

[eudoxus-writes]

Wolfe­schlegel­stein­hausen­berger­dorff­welche­vor­altern­waren­gewissen­haft­schafers­wessen­schafe­waren­wohl­gepflege­und­sorg­faltig­keit­be­schutzen­vor­an­greifen­durch­ihr­raub­gierig­feinde­welche­vor­altern­zwolf­hundert­tausend­jah­res­voran­die­er­scheinen­von­der­erste­erde­mensch­der­raum­schiff­genacht­mit­tung­stein­und­sieben­iridium­elek­trisch­motors­ge­brauch­licht­als­sein­ur­sprung­von­kraft­ge­start­sein­lange­fahrt­hin­zwischen­stern­artig­raum­auf­der­suchen­nach­bar­schaft­der­stern­welche­ge­habt­be­wohn­bar­planeten­kreise­drehen­sich­und­wo­hin­der­neue­rasse­von­ver­stand­ig­mensch­lich­keit­konnte­fort­pflanzen­und­sicher­freuen­an­lebens­lang­lich­freude­und­ru­he­mit­nicht­ein­furcht­vor­an­greifen­vor­anderer­intelligent­ge­schopfs­von­hin­zwischen­stern­art­ig­raum

[eudoxus-writes]

On the nth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me n nouns a-verbing n-1 nouns a-verbing n-2 nouns a-verbing ... four collie birds three french hens two turtledoves and a partridge in a pear tree.

(“Ellipsis” is sung to the tune of “five golden rings.”)

[wolframalpha]

Wot in crustacean computation

https://wolfr.am/mr6Asjyr

[eudoxus-writes]

[mathprofessorquotes]

Last time we did a lot of abstract nonsense. Today we are going to try and turn it into concrete nonsense.

Algebra Professor (via mathprofessorquotes)

[eudoxus-writes]

More people have been to Berlin than I have.

[princesssilkmoth]

…what?

[eudoxus-writes]

May I quote you in something I’m writing?

[eudoxus-writes]

More people have been to Berlin than I have.