๊น ์์ฌ Kim Eun Jae. 24. Doll. persuasion medical student &
human koala bear. ๋๋ฌด๋ ์ปค์ ธ๋ฒ๋ฆฐ
๊ฑฐ์ง์ด ๋ ์ผํค๋ ค ํด oc for gloryhqs
loved by Laura
Despite the cold in his bones, Eun Jae could feel the clamminess of his palms, every time he clenched his hands into small fists. He was struggling to keep his composure and he hadnโt even stepped into the room yet. After being let into his old home, heโd felt even more out of place than usual, despite having lived there for years. Not that he had a lot of memories, other than very basic ones. Doing homework, drawing, playing with his puppy. Nothing much regarding his parents. God, his parents. His heart ached every time he thought about them. And now he was here to try and soothe that aching, but there was the risk of having it shatter completely, instead.
ย After taking a deep breath, he stepped into the room, shoulders slumped and his smile uneasy. โEomma? I--โ Before he could continue, his mother had already silenced him with a raise of her hand. โHow many times do I have to tell you, Eun Jae? Weโre in America.โ The boy bit down into his bottom lip and averted his eyes with a small nod. โSorry. I mean mom.โ He corrected himself. โI donโt have a lot of time, why are you here? If itโs to convince me to give you back your money, youโre wasting your time. Unless youโve restored your lifestyle to how itโs supposed to be?โย
โYou mean... if I broke up with Maxxie and stopped liking boys?โ The studentโs voice broke slightly as he forced himself to look up, the pain evident on his features. โMom, Iโm not gay โcause of Maxxie. Iโm not gay for the attention or โcause itโs a phase. Iโve known since- since I was like... twelve or thirteen. And- And for ten years, mom... for ten years, Iโve hated myself, โcause you taught me it was wrong. โCause you said it was a sin. And for ten years, I prayed to God, to make me better, to make me like girls or- or to change me into a girl or something to make me normal. To make Him love me and to make you and dad love me. I tried everything. I kissed girls and tried to like them, I really did, but it didnโt work.
โAnd I would keep praying and begging to be good, to not be a sinner, so I wouldnโt go to Hell. I was so scared. I was scared of being punished, of never being able to make you proud. I tried so hard to make you want me, to make you smile and to- to tell me I did good. I lied to everyone about who I was and it hurt so much, every day, โcause nothing changed. I went to med school for you, I stopped eating for you, I hated myself โcause I was never good enough. I almost died and you or dad didnโt even come see me. I was kidnapped for days and you didnโt miss me. I wore myself thin in every single way and you canโt even answer my texts.โย
His voice wavered again as tears started rolling down his cheeks, his arms wrapped tightly around himself. โI know you didnโt want me. But you could have aborted me or had me adopted by someone who did want me. And you didnโt. Does that mean you do care? That you do love me? Or do I have to stop hoping that one day youโll see me and hold me and be proud of who I am?โ He was shaking, tears falling freely as he forced himself to look up at his mother. โIโm not gonna change. And- And Maxxie is good for me. I love him. I wanna be with him and marry him and we wanna have kids, too. Heโs the best thing thatโs ever happened to me and Iโm gonna stay with him. He loves me and takes care of me and heโs made me take care of myself. I donโt wanna be straight anymore. I wanna be with him, โcause he makes me happy.โ
He could tell his mother was actually speechless. Not because she hadnโt interrupted him, but because there was something in her eyes that he didnโt quite recognize. And perhaps he was deluding himself, but if he didnโt know better, heโd say it was sadness. Then again, sadness could be caused by many other feelings; disappointment being one of them. Eun Jaeโs phone vibrated in his pocket and he used the silence to send a quick message back to his boyfriend, feeling a little better after being reminded that Maxxie was right outside. He slid the device back into his cardigan and waited, though he was getting antsier by the second. Until eventually she spoke.ย
โIโm sorry.โ The boy held his breath. โIโm sorry you had to feel like that.โ Her voice cracked slightly, leaving Eun Jae even more anxious for what would come next. โYou know we only wanted the best for you.โ Maybe he would have believed that years ago, but now he was reluctant to do so. โYou were never there.โ He whispered as more tears welled up and spilled immediately. โI only wanted you. I just wanted to make you happy. To see you smile. To-โ He was cut off when his mother stepped forward, making him flinch involuntarily, despite the fact sheโd never physically hurt him. But he was completely taken aback when he found himself pulled into a hug, the scent of his motherโs perfume enveloping him like an unfamiliar blanket. ย
Green eyes observed curiously from under her lashes at the kid in front of her rummaging through all of his credit cards, each one being declined or insufficient to pay for something as trivial as a cup of coffee. Felicia did not know whether to laugh, feel pity or be annoyed at how long she had been standing behind him to order her own cup of joe. โOh god, donโt cry. Please do not cry. I donโt do tears or the water works or any of that,โ she pleaded, folding her hands together before side stepping in front of the boy. โCan I order a caramel latte and Iโll pay for the coffee he ordered too. Although, I couldnโt help but overhear the conversation between you two and itโs enormously shitty that you couldnโt cut him some slack since he is a regular customer. I know this is your job or whatever but itโs like two dollars. What is this human decency Iโm always hearing about? Clearly you do not have any and get off on seeing people cry and or squirm in discomfort like this kid here. You should be ashamed and are lucky I donโt go level one hundred Karen let me talk to your manager on you,โ the girl rambled, scrunching her eyebrows together and inserting her credit card chip into the machine to ultimately pay for two coffees.ย โItโs like pocket change. Donโt worry about it, just get that wobbly lip under control.โ
โIโm sorry. Thank you. Iโm sorry.โ Eun Jae felt really ashamed and he knew that his expressive face showed it all; mostly through the deep blush on his otherwise pale features. He felt a little bad for getting the barista in trouble as well, but heโd acted rather impulsively under pressure and now there was no taking it back. Though he was glad he hadnโt given into the temptation to just use his powers, because he realized there were too many witnesses and so far the Sector (presumably) didnโt know his real identity yet. The very last thing he wanted was to get found and locked away in a cell again.
He wasnโt really the easily embarrassed type, but the blondeโs rant really made him want to sink into the floor.ย โItโs-- Itโs okay, um...โ He quietly stammered, not wanting to be impolite, but also not liking feeling responsible for anyoneโs discomfort. He alsoย didnโt want to make this into a bigger thing than it had to be, especially considering that it wasnโt anyone elseโs fault that he had no money to pay for a simple black coffee.
Not to mention they all kept calling him aย โkidโ.
โThank you,โ He said again, trying his hardest to do as he was asked and get a hold of his emotions. God, he wished Maxxie was here to hold his hand, or at least maybe subtly brush their arms together or something. He wasnโt sure how he felt about holding hands out in the open yet.
Taking a deep breath, he forced a weak smile onto his face.ย โThis usually doesnโt happen, I donโt, like, do this every time Iโm here or anything.โ Actually, maybe saying that made it sound like he actually didย do it every time.ย โI still wanna pay you back some time! Like.. Buy your coffee when I get my cards sorted out or- or borrow some money from my roommate.โ
Iris could not help the pang of pity she felt for the stranger. The coffee shop was crowded, and this delay was beginning to garner attention. She pulled out an earphone, wincing as the barista refused to relent.ย
When the boy turned toward her, there was no way she could withstand such pleas when he looked at her with such desperation.ย โOh, of course, donโt panicโI think weโve all been here at some point.โ She almost wanted to call him a term of endearment to alleviate the heaviness of his expression. Iris dug inside her jacket pocket, unearthing her card and handing it to the barista to process the payment.
Iris gave her order before addressing the boy.ย โDo you have enough for a fare home? Or do you live nearby?โ
Though Eun Jae wanted to argue that he definitely hadnโtย found himself in a situation like this ever before, he was wise enough to keep his mouth shut and avoid sounding like a spoiled brat. It was embarrassing enough to have to plead, but he knew very well that he had no choice, other than to give up his coffee. Which he could have made at home, but since heโd been out on a quick walk anyway, heโd automatically found himself in one of his favorite coffee places.
Well, it used to be one of his favorite.
โThank you,โ He managed, voice trembling, though a small, grateful smile appeared on his face.ย โUh, I walked here, so I think Iโll be okay. If I get too tired, I can call my bo-- my roommate. My friend. Ah... Once Iโve figured out my cards and stuff, I can buy you a coffee too!โ He quickly offered, smile broadening slightly as he strictly avoided looking at the barista.ย โMaybe some other place, though.โ He added a little quieter.
She huffed and puffed until her lungs and legs felt as if they were going to give out. โย ย Just keep running, and watch those precious ankles of yours!! You donโt wanna go and sprain your ankle that shit hurts, Dollface!!ย ย โย They were at the end of their rope, or thatโs how it began to seem. The two of them were soon running out of back alleys to hide in.ย She exhaled a growling huff as she stared at the corner before them her own running coming to a steady halt. โย ย FRICKIN FUCK. I must have missed the turn off. You know, on second thought, I should have let you lead to the checkpoint, you should be more familiar with it, no? Orโฆ maybe not since youโre asking what it isโฆ ย ย โ ย But WAIT, Doll was saying something cute, which Reverie, in part, cackle over in laughter.
โย ย Why didnโt you say so, girly? You just tell the bad little cops to stop chasing us, and weโll just walk away with cool new digs. Good plan, yep.ย ย โ ย With her hands on her hips she began to scan the tall building before them. If only sheโd brought her grappling hook, theyโd be scaling that building about halfway, and out of the ear shot of both of those two coppers. Or maybe she would, she didnโt know Doll well enough to know if she was that type of ride or die. โย ย We gotta come up with something fast or youโll have ta bargain with them, huh?ย โ
In all honesty, Eun Jae was pretty worried about his ankles at this moment in time. And he really didnโt want to have to explain to anyone that heโd injured himself while running away from the cops, despite not having done anything to get chased by them in the first place. And why should he run? He could get anything he wanted, could make people doย anything he wanted. Thatโs how he got away with so many things in the past, even without his knowledge of his very powerful ability.ย
If only he realized this was the only reason he hadnโt been kicked out of the Syndicate yet.
โCuz-- Cuz we were.. running.โ He responded with a pout as he pulled up his socks whilst attempting to catch his breath.ย โI dunno what the- the checkpoint is.โ He then explained again, a little worried his heart was about to beat straight out of his chest from the unexpected exercise session.ย
Now, he didnโt like using his power to get out of trouble. He believed in justice and all that, but letting his teammate get caught with... whatever she appeared to have stolen, probably wouldnโt impress Ange. And the last thing he wanted was to get scolded.
No, he liked trying to be the favorite and getting praised for his efforts muchย more.
โI donโt have to bargain. I can tell them to leave and theyโll leave.โ A shy smile pulled at his lips as he pushed his hands into the pockets of his coat.ย โI think itโs much better than running. Unless you think thatโs more exciting?โ
ENDER: Then I'm apparently a string bean according to some people.
ENDER: But yeah, plenty of pie to last a lifetime.
ENDER: I did, thank you for asking! How about you?
ENDER: Sounds adorable! And that sounds cool!
ENDER: I like babies too although I'm pretty sure they don't like me.
ENDER: Thank you and he was a cute baby.
ENDER: The best way I can put it is even on calm days where nothing much happens, parenthood is an adventure. But one that I wouldn't trade for the world.
EUN JAE: wow
EUN JAE: i wish i could eat a lot and not look big
EUN JAE: why do you think babies don't like you??
EUN JAE: yeah?
EUN JAE: i think i wanna be a dad some day
EUN JAE: like
EUN JAE: not right now, but i really wanna be a dad
EUN JAE: though my dog is now sick cuz of me ๐๐
โBut I come here lots and Iโve paid every time, maybe I can pay tomorrow?โ
โIโm sorry, we canโt do that.โ
โI just forgot to bring cash, itโs just a coffee and-โ
โListen, kid, youโre holding up the line here.โ
The student was close to tears, his voice already bordering on whiny as the temptation to just use his power of persuasion to make the barista give him the coffee for free. It wasnโt like he wouldnโt come back later to pay for it, he just wasnโt used to not being able to rely on his cards. Being broke sucked.
(Not that he reallyย knew what it felt like, even now that heโd been cut off by his parents. His boyfriend had enough money to his name to provide for the both of them. He just didnโt like the feeling of having to rely on his partner to pay for things that he used to be able to afford.)
With a trembling bottom lip, he turned around to look at the person behind him, eyes wide and pleading.ย โCould I borrow some money? I can give you my number and I can pay you back as soon as possible? I promise I have it and Iโm not lying or trying to get a free drink, I just--โ
โโ ๐๐๐๐๐๐พ๐ & the syndicateโโ
Runningย fromย theย blue and red flashing lightsย wasย theย biggestย thrill her little heart could ever feel.ย After enrolling in thoseย fall classes at Crystalline University sheโd almost immediately found herself in trouble withย the law.ย She understoodย rules were meant to be maintained in order to create a balancedย and more civilizedย society, but sometimes those rules could weigh you down with the pressures of being perfect. To the struggle of being perfect??ย ย SHEโD TAKE THAT ENEMY UP ANY DAY.ย ย ย It hardlyย made sense to some that sheโd align herself with the villains of the city, but the quiet wildcat spirit within her heart wanted to scratch and paw for anything and everything she wanted.ย ย โย ย AND YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD CATCH ME!ย HA HA HA HA!ย ย โย ย She howled into the starry night sky while tossing a quick look towards the officers, now, on her trails.ย The moment sheโd realign her gaze, however, was the moment her feet went to a skidding halt.ย
โย ย OH YOU AGAIN?ย GOD DAMN IT, BERNICE. MUST YOU ALWAYS HARSH MY MELLOW?ย ย โย She puffed a large exhale out of her lungs as she tossed the other villain the bag of those stolen goodies: a medieval mallet, a deck of cards, and a new costume for herself, she then SKIRRRTTED passed them.ย โย ย You coming or not, loser, weโre almost at checkpoint!ย ย โย ย
Eun Jae barely had time to respond and very narrowly avoiding being sent to the floor by the bag that got tossed in his direction.ย โBernice?โ He echoed in pure confusion, overwhelmed by the situation even before he caught sight of the approaching lights.ย โWhat did you... do?โ It was becoming harder to keep up the higher pitched voice and he wobbled a little in his platform heels, the skirt entirely too cold and impractical in the harsh winter air. He realized in time that this wasnโt a good moment to chat and finally sprung into action, awkwardly running after the fellow Syndicate member as he tried to avoid any blonde hair blowing into his face. He wanted to yell at her to wait for him, but knew he couldnโt give such an order without feeling bad about it, instead just trying his hardest to keep up.
โWhatโs the che-checkpoint?โ He stammered, his muscles already screaming. Gosh, he wasnโt used to any type of exercise and Maxxie would definitely not appreciate the fact he was getting it. Especially not like this.ย โI-- I can... I can tell them to... leave us alone...โ He panted, struggling to keep up the pace and praying he wasnโt about to trip and faceplant into the pavement.ย โI donโt think we have to run!โ
The music vibrated through his body as soon as he stepped inside the nightclub and despite not having had a single drink, Eun Jaeโs surroundings were enough to make him a little dizzy. In hindsight, he wasnโt completely certain why heโd so impulsively asked his boyfriend to go out with him -- all he knew was that he wanted a distraction from everything. Everything, except Maxxie. And while he had tried to do that at home, he was unable to shake the sadness that wrapped around him like a thick mist.
So maybe going out would change that. He didnโt know. He just had to be out of the apartment for a bit. Try and enjoy being himself, instead of feeling that self doubt.
He was practically disowned, but his life wasnโt over. He hadnโt lost everything. Had he even lost anything? It wasnโt like his parents had ever really been there for him in the first place. So why did he feel so empty?
His grip on Maxxieโs hand tightened for a moment, before he interlocked their fingers and dragged the other straight towards the bar.ย โI think I wanna have a drink. And then I wanna dance with you.โ He explained, grateful for knowing his partner could hear him over the music.ย โI just wanna-- Like... I wanna do stuff together. Like this. I donโt wanna hide anymore.โ
