Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 2.7k
Warnings: Violence, blood, explicit death, SA - not overly explicit but highly referenced, use of Y/N, heavy angst, fluff if you squint, explicit language
A/N: unfortunately one of my favourite chapters writing-wise.. Y/N/N = your nickname
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter (coming soon) ______________________________________________
BILE ROSE IN YOUR THROAT AS YOUR FINGERS WENT NUMB, YOUR EARS LETTING OUT A PIERCING RING AS YOU FROZE, STIFF AND STILL. The trees looming around you in the small clearing seemingly grew taller, towering over you as though they aided the man in his attempts to intimidate you. The air grew colder around you, the loss of warmth from the lack of fires suddenly hitting you, goosebumps pricking at your skin as the hair on the back of your neck stood up. Part of you thought that, maybe, just maybe, if you kept still, he wouldn't see you, just like in that dinosaur movie you'd seen all those years ago. "C'mon now, you ain't gotta be scared." His tone dripped with mockery, southern drawl slipping through his lips. You peeked over your shoulder first, hoping and praying your ears were playing tricks on you, though you were left disappointed.
It was odd; the way he was both the same and different. He looked older, sure, his hair greyer, wrinkles deeper, but it was undoubtedly him. His eyes were just as cold and careless as you remembered, his form feeling as though it were towering over you despite the distance between them, broad shoulders making you feel small. Everything suddenly felt wrong. Your top a little too tight around the collar, your hair uncomfortably itching at your scalp, a loose thread on your pants tickling your calf. Your mouth opened, bobbing softly, akin to a fish gasping for air, trying to find the words to say aloud; if there were any, that is.
"Well, you've hardly changed a day." The man muttered, his assault rifle pointed sharply at you, tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip as he eyed you like a lion eyeing a gazelle. Your shaky hands lifted as you turned fully to face him, palms out in an attempt to show you were unarmed, silently praying that he'd let you go - despite knowing he never would.
"What are we doing here, Michael?" You questioned, voice breaking despite your attempts to sound stern. The man stared back at you almost disturbingly, seemingly frozen in time until he took a step towards you, followed by another, and another. Your breathing grew faster, blinking rapidly, partially believing that, eventually, he'd disappear into the night like a leaf in the wind. "Stop it," You whispered.
Sticks crunched beneath his heavy boots, assault rifle still trained on you as he eyed you almost teasingly, silently daring you to try something. "Still following Miller around like a damn puppy, huh?" He questioned rhetorically, mouth slightly ajar as he continued his path closer to you. "Didn't believe it was him at first, but- well then I saw you." If it had come from anyone else's mouth, his words could have almost come across as friendly, admirable even, but from Michael? It felt the complete opposite.
You couldn't tell when it happened, nor how quickly it had happened, but somehow, Michael found himself hovering over you, his hot breath fanning the crook of your neck as he leaned to whisper into your ear, rifle pressed against your chest. "Just as much a bitch as ya used to be." As your ears rang louder, you found it almost difficult to hear him, your mind racing with options, escape routes.
"What do you want?" You questioned shakily, slightly louder this time. Your breathing was heavy as you felt Michael move, the rifle sliding across your chest as he rounded you. The two could faintly hear the sound of screams and gunfire in the distance, screeches of Infected as they tore through soldiers like nothing but paper. Before Michael could respond, you moved, your actions swift, unsteady as though you hadn't even comprehended them before doing so. Your hand gripped the rifle, ripping it from his hands before he had a chance to respond, opting to take whatever chance you could rather than let him do whatever he wanted. Click. Unintentionally, you let a slight whimper escape your lips at the sound emitted from the rifle. It was empty. Of course, it was fucking empty.
You felt Michael's posture stiffen, practically feeling the heat of his anger radiating off him from his uncomfortably close proximity. Your hands shook as he - almost too gently - slipped the rifle from your hands, too frozen in shock to retaliate as he dropped the pointless weapon to the ground, that and the sudden stiffness of a pistol pressed against your side. "Just as stupid, too," Michael muttered. Your bottom lip shook softly, subtly biting it between your teeth in an attempt to hide your fear, though you knew that Michael could tell. He could always tell when he made you scared; he thrived on it.
"You wouldn't 'ave survived without me." He practically spat into your ear, pushing both the pistol and himself further into your right side as you hissed softly. "I made you." Your ears rang louder as you felt the man's lips graze your ear, breath hot, eyes piercing the side of your face. Despite the twenty years that had passed, the hardships you'd faced, the developments you had made, you felt the same as you did all those years ago. Helpless. Stuck.
You grimaced, swallowing the lump in your throat as you blinked away your tears, silently refusing to let them fall, not when he could see. It was then you knew. Knew that you'd rather die trying than let him hold power over you. Not again. You were uncaring of the gunshot, uncaring of the sudden flash of light that came from it, uncaring even of the stinging pain piercing through your side. All you could focus on was Michael's face. Before everything, before the end of the world, yes, you had fought before. But not like this.
Before, you'd fight, but with fear, with hesitancy. Knowing that, in the end, you'd be back with Michael. Lying in his cold bed, sore, shaking, still feeling the heaviness of his hands all over you. Michael saw it in your eyes every time. That look that told him you knew what was coming. That you knew it was all a means to the same end. But when Michael saw the way you looked at him, he knew that this was different. You didn't hesitate, didn't even think. You were stern. You knew that, one way or another, it would end. That you couldn't let him win, you wouldn't.
You grunted as you grasped the pistol tightly, pulling, desperate to rip it from Michael's hands as he groaned from the sudden shock of it. You were so focused on grabbing the weapon that you almost hadn't noticed the sickening feeling of your back pressed against his chest as you pushed back to gain leverage; almost. You heard him mutter curses beneath his breath, leaves and sticks crunching beneath your feet as you scrambled around the small clearing.
The night wrung out around you, shadows seemingly growing darker, making it more difficult to see as your struggle continued, Michael hissing in pain as your nails broke the skin on his hands. The man's grip on the pistol lightened slightly, leaving you to believe, for a moment, that you had it, that is, until Michael punted you in the face. His fist swung round, you grunting as you lost balance, becoming disoriented for just a second. Your face stung with pain, though it quickly fell to the back of your mind as you hit away the pistol you found pointed at your face.
You hardly had a moment to comprehend the sound of the gun hitting the ground a couple of meters away when Michael landed atop of you, practically growling beneath his breath. Hovering over you, his knees pressed against the sides of your hips, his hands grasping tightly at your wrists whilst staring down at you in rage. He'd been angry before, but not like this. Now, it was different. He knew you weren't his. Not anymore. And the fact infuriated him.
You whimpered, desperately trying to rip your wrists out of his harsh grip as you gasped for air, his heavy weight knocking the wind out of you. "Yer still mine." He spat at you, gritting his teeth as he grew uncomfortably close to your face, thighs tightening around your hips as his lips danced against your cheek; his chest uncomfortably pressed against your own. Your legs kicked aimlessly, hoping that you'd somehow knock him off as he pulled at your shirt, scratching the soft skin beneath in his movements. Your wrist ached, emitting a painful warmth as you finally ripped away, clenching your fist before managing to land a right hook against Michael's jaw.
The man toppled, catching himself from falling whilst you scrambled to move away from under him; though, you weren't quite that lucky. His grip was tight, unforgiving, your mind growing fuzzy as he cut off your oxygen, his hands grasped tightly around your throat. You gasped, clawing at his face and arms, though he remained uncaring of the red marks you drew. You felt yourself losing it, the way your vision blurred and your head grew lighter
Your hand felt around, desperately hoping that maybe you could blindly find the pistol, but all you felt was the disappointment of dead leaves and small pebbles. Your arms grew heavy, finding that, with every moment that passed, it grew harder to lift them, Michael's face growing almost triumphant. Desperately, you grabbed at anything, hoping to find something that could help you, but you knew you were running out of time.
The handle felt cold in your grasp - though, with the lack of oxygen, it wasn't like you could fully comprehend it anyway -, hands shaking as you ripped the blade from where it had been tucked into Michael's boot. Part of you wondered if you were imagining it, that maybe you were already dead and this was your mind coming up with ways you could have made it, but the sudden rush of oxygen to your brain told you otherwise. You heard Michael hiss in pain, letting out a string of curses as you gasped for air, a hand coming up to gently hold your throat while the other remained tightly wrapped around the blade.
Michael's head whipped around, one hand hovering over his face, fingers parted just slightly so that you could see the large gash across his cheek, dripping with blood. He looked at you with rage, eyes dark as his fists clenched, teeth practically bared. Though before he could move, you jumped, grunting as you grasped tightly onto the collar of his shirt, shoving him harshly into the ground as you hovered above him. Your ears rang, lips parted as you stared down at him, eyes wide, pupils constricted.
You stabbed, then again, and again, the warmth of his blood enveloping your hands as you panted, the man's screams and groans falling upon death ears. You felt him stop moving, stop struggling, stop breathing, but you couldn't care less. You just kept stabbing. You needed his face out of your head, the feeling of his weight on top of you out of your head, the warmth of his breath against your skin out of your head. You needed him gone, and that's what you were going to get.
You were almost surprised that the blade hadn't broken yet, your grip on the handle so tight your hand started going numb. Your face felt warm, though you couldn't tell if it was from the recirculation oxygen, Michael's blood that had splatted up onto your face, or the tears that had started streaming down. You were so focused, you hadn't even noticed the sobs that tore through your throat, echoing out into the night. However, what you did notice was the sudden presence of hands gripping the sides of your arms.
You screamed as you jumped up, flailing the knife around in a desperate attempt to escape the grasp of whoever it was. It was only when your ears finally stopped ringing that you grasped what was happening, grasped the look of concern on Joel's face. You saw his lips move, taking a few moments to hear what he was saying as he gently held your face with his right hand, the other busy practically holding you up, your legs too weak to stand alone. "Y/N/N. Are you okay?" He repeated slowly for what must have been the third time as you blinked repeatedly before shakily nodding, bottom lip quivering as tears continued to well.
Joel looked you over, scowling slightly at the red marks around your neck that seemingly grew darker by the second, the blooming of a bruise on your cheek; he even noted the disarray of your shirt, slightly torn and pulled askew at your shoulder, though it seemed as if you hadn't exactly noticed how bad it was yet. Gently, he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, slowly guiding you away from the clearing, eyes watching Michael's almost unrecognisable body for just a moment, silently assuring himself that he was dead. Your movements were slow and wobbly, the man's hold growing tighter, careful not to push past your limits.
He shook his head softly at Ellie, who looked on in confusion, Henry and Sam a little further back, the older brother quietly guiding her shoulder to walk ahead, leaving you and Joel to follow. Joel looked down at you with eyes of concern, eyes travelling over your form, noting the distant look in your eyes. He had you, but you weren't there.
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THE MOTEL ROOM WAS RATHER QUIET, JOEL AND HENRY SHARING A FEW WORDS, ELLIE AND SAM IN THE ROOM ACROSS TALKING AMONGST THEMSELVES. Ever so faintly, Joel could hear the sound of the bathroom sink still running, you having closed yourself in from the moment you'd arrived. Joel tried everything to distract himself, to stop himself from barging into the bathroom to make sure you were still there. He'd quietly offered for Henry to join them on their way to Wyoming before falling into meaningless soft chatter, quite purposefully avoiding any talk about you.
Though when silence grew louder, it became harder to ignore the sounds from the bathroom; the quiet sobs, the heavy breathing. As Henry went to check on Sam and Ellie, Joel grunted softly as he stood, staring at the bathroom door as though it were his enemy, taking long yet slow strides towards it. He knocked softly, slowly turning the doorknob as the door creaked open, silently surprised that it hadn't been locked the entire time as he'd initially presumed.
He watched your back, your posture stiff as you hunched over the sink, shoulders shaking as he heard the soft sniffles originating from you. His hand was gentle as it landed on your shoulder, eyes soft as he gently turned you around, oxygen escaping his lungs as he zoned in on your hands. They were red, raw and sore after being repeatedly scrubbed clean through your desperate attempts to get Michael's blood off. "Joel, I can't- I feel him-" You hiccupped through a broken voice, lips trembling as your hands shook, looking up at the man desperately. "He's all over me." You sobbed.
Without a word, Joel gently grasped your hands, quietly turning the tap to cold as he massaged your palms beneath the gentle stream of water. You continued to hiccup softly, looking down quietly at the sink, watching his movements. He sighed softly, spotting the patch of blood along with the tear in your shirt against your right side. Without a word, he continued to tend to you. Gently patching up the long skim against your side left from the missed shot Michael had fired, dabbing away the blood on your face - unsure whether it was Michael's or your own - as he looked at your neck in concern.
It had taken a few minutes, but eventually, Joel managed to slowly lure you out of the bathroom, Henry quietly sleeping on the other side of the room. You sat against the wall, Joel sitting right beside you, one hand caressing your head whilst the only held gently onto your hand, noting the harsh redness beginning to dissipate. "I've got you." He whispered gently into your ear. It wasn't a claim of ownership, you knew that. If it had come from Michael, or anyone else for that matter, it would have come across that way, but from Joel? It was different. He had you, and that meant you were safe.
Pairing: Johnny Storm x F!Reader
WC: 1.7k
Summary: You were both certain you'd kept it under wraps. You're sneaky kisses, hidden glances, and nights slept in the same bed. Initially, it had just been because you were uncertain of where it would go, but then, despite the depth of your feelings for one another, it just felt easier that way. It was blissful, just as your complete unawareness of the team's knowledge of your relationship was.
Warnings: No significant Fantastic Four: First Steps spoilers. Established relationship, insinuated/beginning of smut, fluff, steamy kisses, lovesick Johnny, slightly protective Reed, reader is described to have the ability to manipulate shadows, use of Y/N.
A/N: I started this in August but got too depressed to finish sooooo
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Masterlist | REQUESTS OPEN ______________________________________________
YOU PULLED JOHNNY'S ARMS TIGHTER AROUND YOU, PUSHING YOUR BACK FURTHER AGAINST HIS CHEST DESPERATE TO FEEL HIS WARMTH. "You know you've got a bed warmer in your room, right?" He teased despite knowing he wouldn't have it any other way. You sighed playfully, pushing away the blanket draped on top of you both as you dramatically sat up.
"Whatever." You bantered, one foot hitting the cold floor when you were dragged back, Johnny's warm hands planted onto your thighs as he sat you on top of him. Your laughter filled the room, looking down at your boyfriend through squinted eyes, your smile wide.
"Funny." He muttered beneath his breath as he pulled you down. His lips felt like fire against yours - no pun intended - his hands grasping tightly at your skin as though you'd disappear. He felt your hips squirm on top of him as he reached one hand beneath your shirt, or better known as his shirt that you stole, whilst your hands remained flat against his bare chest.
You pulled away for only a moment, lips swollen as you stared at one another, Johnny looking at you as if you were the only thing in the world. "I told Ben I'd go to the bakery with him..." You muttered against his lips as you pulled him in for another kiss, a yelp escaping your throat when he flipped you. His arms caged you in as he pulled you in for swift pecks that quickly turned into steamy makeouts. "Johnny, I'm serious." You laughed between kisses.
Reluctantly, you pulled away, pushing away his face as you stood up, slipping off his shirt to replace it with your own. Johnny shamelessly watched you change from where he lay, his fingers interlaced behind his head as a slight smirk painted his lips. You couldn't hide the smile on your face as you turned to him, the look in his eyes telling you all you needed to know. You took a few strides to the boy, leaning down closer to his face as you held a hand to his cheek. "Bye, Johnny." You sang against his lips before walking out of his room, quietly pulling the door closed behind you.
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YOU WALKED SIDE BY SIDE WITH BEN, HANDING HIM A BLACK AND WHITE COOKIE FROM THE BROWN PAPER BAG BEFORE TAKING ONE FOR YOURSELF, MOANING AT THE TASTE AS IT HIT YOUR TONGUE. You swatted away Ben's hand as he reached for another, pulling the bag away from his reach. "Nuh-uh, I told Johnny I'd give him some." You said, mouth still full of food. You kept walking side by side, unaware of the look Ben was sending you.
"You'd give him some, huh?" He grumbled with a smirk. Your brows furrowed, looking up at him out of confusion, muttering a quick 'yeah'. The man almost enjoyed it. Being able to poke fun at you and Johnny without you even realising it. Obviously, he meant no harm, but it was free game until either of you finally admitted it or slipped up in the least.
He recalled the moment he'd found out about you and Johnny, walking in on the two of you moments away from a makeout session in the middle of the Baxter Building's living room. You'd both been certain that the floor was empty when Ben walked in, leaving both of your faces flushed at the sight of the man. You and Johnny had stammered out jumbled-up excuses, quickly rushing away whilst giggling like school kids, believing you'd been so slick that Ben had no idea. You and Johnny were both smart, but you could've definitely improved at scanning your surroundings before jumping right into a steamy kissing sesh. That and your impromptu excuse-making abilities.
"You gonna help cook tonight?" He questioned bringing up a change of topic.
You pondered for a moment. "Maybe, depends on what Reed needs me for."
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REED WATCHED ON CURIOUSLY AS YOU GRASPED THE EGG, YOUR EYES SCANNING IT FOR A MOMENT BEFORE SLOWLY REACHING FOR THE DARK SHADOW MANIPULATED TO SIT IN THE CENTER OF THE WORKTOP. "And you don't... do- anything to make it work?" Reed questioned, looking at your hand along with the egg poking out of another shadow on the completely other side of the room, your skin just as dark as the shadows surrounding them, the egg unchanged.
You shrugged, looking over at the egg before pulling your hand away from the shadow, observing the unaltered object. "Not really, I just... do it." You muttered, jumping up to sit on the bench. You yawned softly as Reed jotted down some notes in his own technical jabber you struggled to understand, his eyes jumping up for a moment to read the filled-out page he'd noted over the previous couple of hours you'd sat in the lab together for. You peeked over his shoulder for a moment before jumping off the bench, patting his shoulder before walking towards the elevator. "Send me up if ya need anything else; I'll prolly be with Johnny." You called out as the elevator rang, the doors slowly shutting, leaving Reed in silence.
That is, until Sue appeared, the woman finally speaking up after having kept silent for the past hour, simply watching you and Reed. "How long you wanna bet until they spill?" She questioned as she leaned against the cabinet, Reed sending her a look before turning back to his notes. It wasn't the fact that you'd said you'd be with Johnny; in fact, it was normal even before you took your relationship further. Instead, yet again, it was simply due to your and Johnny's complete obliviousness to how obvious the two of you had been. Reed hummed in response to his wife.
Initially, he hadn't been all that fond of you and Johnny, the man believing that, with Johnny's reputation, it was nothing but a fling that would leave you hurt. He'd always been slightly protective of you, having been friends with you well before the solar flare and even before he'd really gotten to know Johnny. It had taken a while - along with hours of conversing with his wife - to convince him that, at least from what Sue could see, it was more than a fling. It was something real. "Let's just hope I don't have to keep up this unknowing act." He grumbled. Sue chuckled, walking up to her husband to place a hand on his chest, the two facing one another for a few moments before Sue pressed a soft kiss against her husband's lips.
Their attention was diverted by the sound of the elevator dinging, Johnny letting out a 'whoop' as he saw his sister and brother-in-law. "I'm not walking in on any baby-making activities, am I?" He teased with a smug smirk. Sue rolled her eyes at her brother whilst Reed simply shook his head, turning back to his work. "Have you guys seen Y/N?" He asked, remaining next to the elevator.
The husband and wife shared a sly look before Sue responded. "Yeah, she just went downstairs, Johnny." She said, trying to hide the small smile she wore.
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YOU AND JOHNNY SAT PRACTICALLY ON TOP OF ONE ANOTHER ON THE SOFA, THE MAN'S HAND RESTING COMFORTABLY ON THE CURVE OF YOUR HIP AS HE MOVED TO PRESS HIS HOT LIPS AGAINST YOURS. The building was quiet, Ben in his room with Sue and Reed presumably out in the city on a date night. "C'mon, Ben's definitely in his room this time, I made sure of it. Who's it gonna hurt..." Johnny spoke against your lips. You couldn't help but chuckle, one hand pressed against his chest.
"Us, Johnny. We agreed we'd wait until we told them before risking it... again." You muttered, betraying your own words as your lips embraced, the man's hand coming up to cradle the back of your head, yours pulling at his shirt to bring him closer - if it were even possible. "Okay, seriously. We have our own rooms." You spoke, unsure of whether you were trying to convince Johnny or yourself.
"And we also have a living room." He said, too lust drunk to really pull away, the man pulling you in yet again for another heated kiss. Your ears rang, your skin hot against Johnny's, unaware of what was happening around you - though, even if you had been aware, you still wouldn't have seen her coming.
"Try to keep it in the bedrooms at least, please." Reed practically pleaded as he and Sue made their way through the living room, up to their bedroom. You and Johnny jumped apart wide-eyed, the man accidentally finding himself hitting his ass on the floor with a groan as he slipped off the sofa. Sue chuckled, watching the two of you attempting to collect yourselves,
"W- uh, you guys were out- we just, uhm." You muttered, blinking as you tried to come up with an excuse as to what Sue had walked in on. Despite your shock after the surprise intrusion, you found yourself confused by the couple's nonchalant attitudes.
Johnny stared, his mouth open, catching flies as the two began walking up the stairs. "You knew?" He questioned as he shot up from the floor, his voice coming out more high-pitched than he'd meant for it. Reed simply hummed as he rounded the corner, you and Johnny sharing a look before he called out once more. "Could you not tell Ben?" He called, Sue yelling out before landing out of earshot.
"He already knows!" As the living room grew silent yet again, you and Johnny stared at one another in shock. You blinked absentmindedly, mouth agape as you stammered out your words.
"They know? They... knew?" You'd both been certain you were slick, hiding your relationship from the other residents of the Baxter Building, sure that they'd had no idea. You watched as Johnny's shock turned into a sly smile, the man wandering close to you before suddenly pulling you up from the sofa; a giggle escaped your lips as you yelped out at the sudden movement.
His lips pressed up against yours, his hand tightly grasping the back of your head as his other hand roamed your waist, travelling beneath your shirt. You chuckled his name under your breath as you pulled away for air. "Maybe we should listen to Reed and keep it in the bedrooms." He breathed out, his eyes delving into yours, hands hot against your skin.
Not-So-Secret
You were both certain you'd kept it under wraps. You're sneaky kisses, hidden glances, and nights slept in the same bed. Initially, it had just been because you were uncertain of where it would go, but then, despite the depth of your feelings for one another, it just felt easier that way. It was blissful, just as your complete unawareness of the team's knowledge of your relationship was.
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 3.4k
Warnings: Violence, blood, death, no use of Y/N
A/N: writing instead of studying for exams </3
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
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THE LONG, DARK HALLWAY STARED BACK AT THEM DAUNTINGLY, EVERY SOUND ECHOING OFF THE WALLS AS THE LIGHT FROM THEIR FLASHLIGHTS CAUGHT ONTO THE RUSTY WATER DRIPPING FROM THE CEILING. "You see? It's empty. The plan is good." Henry spoke loudly, though Joel was quick to shush him.
"'The plan is good'?" Joel repeated. "We've been down here two seconds. We don't know anything." His tone was dull, voice low as to avoid catching any unnecessary attention, the man's eyes darting at the slightest of movement in the shadows, piercing the blinding darkness.
Henry looked to Ellie with a raised brow, speaking as though Joel couldn't hear. "You're Dad's kind of a pessimist." The man was slightly shocked as the two spoke back to him in unison, both voices stern and certain.
"He's not my Dad."
"I'm not her Dad." You kept quiet, exhaling softly as you stepped forward. "Just point your light forward... and be ready to run," Joel ordered.
The walls creaked eerily around them, wind howling through the halls as they ventured deeper into the tunnels. You could feel eyes staring into the back of your head now and again, looking back momentarily to find Joel. The two of you hadn't exactly acted differently after your moment, but there was a shift in the air; the way Joel seemed to loom over you more than before, his eyes landing on you more often - if that were even possible. "Whoa," Ellie exclaimed as they used their lights to look around the small space, walls adorned with colourful children's paintings, a delightful change in comparison to the dingy halls they'd been stuck with previously.
Paint peeled softly from the walls, splotches of mould darkening to colourful images. Quickly pushing Sam back to stop him from rushing through, Joel was first to - cautiously - step through the castle-painted doorway, looking around with his pistol drawn as the others followed through after.
The lights hung from the ceiling lit up the room, small kids' tables scattered throughout the open space, along with shelves and countertops filled with toys and books, a large soccer goal painted onto the back wall, and an assortment of other paintings filling the rest. "I heard about places like this." Joel started. "People went underground after Outbreak Day. Built settlements." He explained, looking at the whiteboard still filled with 'house rules', from keeping all doors locked to no shouting.
"What happened to them?" Ellie questioned.
"Maybe they didn't follow the rules, and they all got infected." He said sternly, the young girl humming in response. As Ellie and Sam began to play, the adults continued to look around; you put your ear up to any door you could find to hear for any Infected, jumping slightly at the sound of Joel's harsh voice. "Hey, keep it down. We're not out yet."
"Ah, come on. Can we just rest here for a while? There's, like, actually shit to do here." Ellie complained.
Henry spoke up, looking over at Joel, who watched the two unimpressed. "Wouldn't be so bad to wait the light out a bit. Safer in shadows when we pop back out on the other side." He added, noting the tactical advantages to waiting.
Joel pondered, looked back at Ellie and Sam, sitting side by side, looking up at him hopefully, his eyes then jumping to you, looking at the bruise beneath your eye for just a moment. You shared a range of silent glances, you shrugged softly before Joel gave off a 'fine' gesture to the kids, looking around once more whilst the two excitedly celebrated.
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SAM AND ELLIE GIGGLED AS THEY KICKED THE OLD SOCCER BALL AGAINST THE FAKE NET, ELLIE PLAYFULLY PUSHING THE BOY AROUND AS YOU, JOEL, AND HENRY WATCHED ON FROM THE OTHER END OF THE ROOM. The laughter was a polite change from the usual grumbles and cries; the wide smiles on their faces reminding both you and Joel of happier times. "If you were..." Joel started. "collaboratin' to take care of him, I... I shouldn't have said what I said." He was slightly awkward as he spoke, arms folded firmly against his broad chest as he glanced at Henry for a moment before looking back at the kids. "I don't know your situation. And I'm not sayin' they should let it go but... all things considered, seems kinda cruel- to send a whole army after you for that."
Henry was quiet for a few moments, trying to find the words to respond. "You know, I wasn't, uh... exactly telling you guys the truth before." You side-eyed him, absentmindedly leaning closer to Joel, the man also looking at him cautiously. "About me not killing someone. There was a man, a great man. You know, he was never afraid... never selfish... and he was always forgiving. Have you ever met someone like that? Kinda man you'd follow anywhere."
Both you and Joel were quiet, Joel looking over to Ellie and Sam now and again, though his focus was mostly on Henry. You, however, couldn't help but look subtly at Joel as Henry spoke. Never afraid. Never selfish. Always forgiving. The kind of man you'd follow anywhere. If it were anyone else you had known from before, you were sure they'd shoot you dead, uncaring of anything you may have had before, but Joel? No. He cared. Acted as if you hadn't spent twenty years without one another. He was the man you'd follow to the ends of the Earth.
"I mean, I wanted to." Henry continued. "Well... I would've. Yeah, but, uh, Sam, he, uh... he got sick. Leukemia." The adults were quiet for a moment, Joel watching silently as you gave Henry a glance of sorrow. "Yeah, anyway, um... there was one drug that worked, and, whoa... big shock... there wasn't much left of it and it belonged to FEDRA. And if I wanted some... it was gonna take something big. So I gave them something big. That one great man. The leader of the resistance movement in Kansas City. And Kathleen's brother."
Anyone could see the way the cogs turned in Joel's head, his chest heaving slightly as he stared down at the table in front of him. "Yeah, so, you still think they should take it easy on me? Or am, am I the bad guy? I don't know what you're waitin' on. The answer's easy. I am the bad guy because I did a bad guy thing. But you get it, though." He proceeded, looking to Joel first, followed by you, though he focused primarily on the former. "You might not be her father... but you were someone's. See, I could tell."
The three were quiet for a while, Henry observing, waiting for any obvious reaction from the two, quietly hoping for something from Joel. "You're not a bad guy." You started, knowing Joel wouldn't give the man a response. "You're a brother." Your voice was soft, looking Henry in the eyes, not scared to speak your truth; the truth. Henry didn't respond, but his eyes told you all you needed, the way they shone in the dim light, big in an almost pleading manner.
Joel stood up, grabbing hold of his pistol as he spoke, his voice gravelly. "We've waited long enough."
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WITH THE MOON AS THEIR ONLY SOURCE OF LIGHT, THE GROUP MOVED BOTH QUIETLY AND CAUTIOUSLY THROUGH THE ROAD, WEAVING BETWEEN THE OLD BEAT-UP CARS, YOU AND JOEL TAKING THE FRONT. "No. No one is here." Henry spoke aloud as he signed to Sam. "No one's gonna be here because... my plan worked." He said confidently.
"So much goddamn talkin'," Joel responded, accent strong.
Henry chuckled softly. "I'm just saying... I delivered. Make this right, go down the street, embankment behind the last house... and we're out."
Though neither you nor Joel responded, you shared a look, one filled with a soft sense of hope; happiness, if you will. "So we cross the river and then what?" Ellie questioned. "Where ya gonna go?"
"Don't know yet."
"Well, we're goin' to Wyoming." Joel's head snapped to the young girl, a stern look painting his face. "What? It's a huge state. It can fit two more people." She dragged.
"Yeah... maybe we just call this one a success and say our fond farewells," Henry said, not wanting to push his luck with the Miller.
"No, he'll change his mind. Trust me. This is how it goes." She started, putting on a deep voice that was supposed - key word, supposed - to imitate Joel. "He's like, 'No, Ellie. Never, ever, ever happening.'" She teased as you swallowed a sharp snicker. "And then I'm like, 'I'm gonna ask you a million more times.' And he's like-"
Before the girl could finish, a gunshot rang out, piercing the dead silence of the night. "Move, move! Go!" Joel yelled out, ushering you and Ellie behind a car, Henry and Sam right in front. Dirt kicked up off the road as gunshots continued to fire every few moments, your chest heaving as you tried to catch your breath after the sudden shock.
"The fuck is that comin' from?" Henry stressed. You held a hand onto Ellie's shoulder, your other hand hovering near Sam, ready to run if need be.
"Shut up." Joel poked his head out from the car, looking toward the origin of the gunshots before quickly ducking back down, glass shattering from nearby as another gunshot rang out. Henry followed soon after, poking his head up, though a gunshot rang out much quicker than it had for Joel.
"Fuck. Let's move. Let's go." Henry stood up, beginning to drag Sam away with him in an attempt to make a break for it before you grabbed hold of the young boy's upper arm. Sam's eyes were wide with fear, uncertain as to what was happening, but sure that something was clearly wrong. Henry couldn't help but glare, brows furrowed in confusion, before a gunshot rang out right near him. The man pushed his brother back against the car, sending you another look, though, this one much kinder, much more appreciative. "What do we do?" He whispered.
You looked to Joel, licking your parched, chapped lips as your mind raced. "Stay here," Joel ordered, both your's and Ellie's brows furrowing. "If you don't move, he's not gonna hit you." He said, looking between the two as he kept his head ducked. "I'm gonna go around, try to get in the house through the back, and then I'll take him out."
"But if you go out there, he's gonna kill you." The young girl stressed.
"It's dark and he has shit aim. Nobody's gonna kill me."
"Then he's gonna kill us." You watched the two, your eyes filled with fear as a lump grew in your throat.
"Do you trust me?" He spoke softly, Ellie nodding slightly. At that, Joel moved, gripping his pistol tightly when you pulled him down.
"You die, and I will kill you." You threatened through gritted teeth, your hand grasping his arm rather tightly. The man bowed his head, eyes watching you for a moment longer before he made a run for it, gunshots following him, all of which missed. You watched him as long as you could until he was out of eyesight, the sudden stillness of the air making your body tense.
You regained your hold on Ellie, your other hand still grasping Sam. At every movement, every breath, the dirt shifted beneath their feet whilst you cringed at every crunch. The sound of gunfire died out, the atmosphere shifting as one final shot cried out, the four looking back over the car cautiously.
You weren't certain how it had happened; it all moved so quickly, the trucks speeding towards them, the gunshots, the running, it all managed to blur together. It was either that or the way your head ricocheted off the ground after the explosion that had knocked both you and Ellie off your feet. You barely had time to register the hot flames burning all around you as Henry dragged both of you away, desperate to take cover behind another car. "You okay?" The man questioned, Ellie muttering a quick 'yeah' as you simply nodded, your head pounding too hard to mouth a response. Your ears continued to ring as a woman's voice rang out, you assumed it had to of been Kathleen, considering she knew Henry by name.
"Dead end, Henry." She called out. "Gonna step on out? Save us some time? No? That's all right. Doesn't matter." Her voice was calculated, cynical even; calm in a way that would make anyone feel unsettled. Her voice was slightly higher-pitched than you had imagined it, but you didn't exactly have time to consider how exactly it was different.
"I'll come out!" Henry yelled, your head whipping to the man as you pursed your lips, giving him the same look a mother gives her kid when they're throwing a tantrum in the middle of the shopping aisle. "Just let the others go!"
"What the hell are you doing?" You scolded in something between a whisper and a yell, grasping his forearm so tightly you left small crescent moon shapes through his jacket and into his skin from your nails.
"No. Sorry." Kathleen spoke, though her tone said she was anything but. "The girls are with the man who killed Bryan. And Sam... well, Sam's with you."
"You don't understand!" Henry cried. Sam cowered, eyes wide with terror, uncertain of what was happening but certain that his brother was in clear distress.
"But I do." You scoffed softly at her voice, at her fake attempts at compassion that anyone could read through. "I know why you did what you did. But did you ever stop to think that maybe he was supposed to die?"
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JOEL'S EYEBROWS FURROWED, EYES SQUINTED AS HE TRIED TO LOOK DOWN AT WHAT WAS HAPPENING BELOW. Something felt wrong, well, something was wrong, but there was something else. Something gnawing at the man from deep within his gut, like a memory trying to dig itself out from the deepest, darkest parts of his mind. He scanned Kathleen, looked over the way her dark hair was pulled back out of her face, a large coat covering her, shielding her from the piercing cold. Yes, she unsettled him, but it was something about the man next to her.
The way he towered, his entire aura intimidating, threatening, without even having to look him in the eye. His shoulders were broad, standing at maybe six feet on a good day, his hair softly grey, cut shorter at the sides and longer on the top. It was difficult for him to make out any specific features, and yet, there was still something so sickeningly familiar. He looked over the rifle in his hand, knuckles white as he gripped it, whilst he kept a pistol tucked deep into the back of his pants, the outline of a knife tucked into his boot. Just from the looks of it, he seemed to know his way around a gun, pointing it at the ground, ready to shoot whenever need be.
Usually, when you finally remember where you recognise someone from, you feel a sense of excitement, smugness even. But for Joel? No. Not even close. The realisation hit him like a truck, his stomach falling to his feet as the air escaped his lungs. He attempted to gauge you as best he could, trying to see if you'd realised who it was; though, he wasn't sure whether he'd prefer you to or not.
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"HE'S JUST A FUCKING KID!" Henry yelled. Desperate to get through to the woman who, from the sounds of it, had made up her mind already. Fires burned around them, lighting up the dark skies, popping and sizzling.
Kathleen stood tall, unconcerned and unbothered, knowing well that she had them cornered. "Well, kids die, Henry. They die all the time. You think the whole world revolves around him? That he's worth... everything?" Her tone grew increasingly angry, words sharp with venom, practically spitting as she spoke. "Well, this is what happens when you fuck with fate."
Henry turned to you, looking into your eyes pleadingly. "Get ready to take them and run." He ordered, gesturing to Sam and Ellie. You shook your head, eyes fierce with certainty that you weren't going to let him leave. "Yes. Do it."
"It's time, Henry. Enough!" She yelled. You grabbed hold of Ellie, who then grabbed hold of Sam, the young girls grip tight with fear.
You were ready. As much as you didn't want to be, you were; your free hand pressed against the car, ready to push off and run as fast as you could in hopes you wouldn't be shot dead. You were ready; that is, until you heard another voice. "Come out before I shoot you dead through the damn car." The man's voice was stern, a slight southern drawl falling through as he spoke. You froze dead. You could recognise the voice from anywhere. The same voice that had haunted you for years, plaguing your dreams with memories you'd wished to be rid of.
Your head whipped to Henry's, brows furrowed, your throat suddenly much drier than it had been moments before. You took a few moments to conjure your words, and even then, they came out stammered. "Mike. Is that his name? That's it?" You questioned quickly, tongue moving faster than your brain.
Henry was confused, scowling slightly. "Yeah. Mike. Michael. The fuck does that matter?" Your ears rang, breath growing heavy as the oxygen-filled air suddenly wasn't enough. The man watched you for a moment, unsure of what to do, before he sighed, turning back and taking a deep breath before standing, chest heaving as he held his hands up in surrender.
You could see Sam fighting to get to his brother, Ellie struggling to hold him back, whilst simultaneously staying quiet, but you couldn't move. It was as though you'd looked deep into the eyes of Medusa herself, your feet already beginning to turn to stone. It wasn't until the sound of snarling and screeching caught your ears that you finally snapped out, Henry desperately pulling at your arm.
You caught sight of the horde, hundreds of Infected crawling out of the fallen house, some more developed than others, your blood running cold at the sight; though, nothing could compare to how you felt when you momentarily locked eyes with him. The man who, unlike Joel, you'd hoped and prayed to never see again. Michael cocked his head when he saw you, pupils pinning before he looked back at the hoard, his grip on his rifle suddenly stronger, more fierce and aggressive, his jaw cracking as he clenched his teeth.
People screamed around you, blood-curdling screams of death and agony as they were ripped apart, literally eaten alive, the army of what once was fifty-something men dwindling fast. The fire somehow roared louder, as the once peaceful night sky turned anything but. Your head spun as you lost hold of Ellie; Henry and Sam, already running ahead, quickly getting lost amongst the chaos surrounding them. Your hand felt bare without the girl grabbing hold of it, the emptiness leaving a pit in your stomach you didn't want to imagine getting used to. You stumbled over bodies, dead or alive; it didn't matter. You had to find Ellie.
The girl's name escaped your lips with a roar, your throat begging you to stop, mind urging you to continue. A deep grumble shook the ground beneath your feet, your eyes widening further - if that were possible - at the sight of the Bloater. Its body leaked unknown liquids, covered with welts and plates, the monster towering over anyone and everyone that stood in its way. Your mind raced with all sorts of possibilities regarding the safety of Ellie; whether she'd gotten away, or if she was already ripped apart and thrown around amongst the chaos. That is, until you'd heard Joel's voice.
You were certain you had to have been imagining things, believing that you wouldn't be able to hear him over the roars of the Bloater, along with the screams that followed. But where there's a will, there's a way. "I got her, go!" You heard faintly, Joel's husky tone practically echoing through the air. Reluctantly and unwantingly, you ran, your blood pumping as your feet hit the ground, running desperately to get away. The sound of gunfire grew fainter, the loud bangs from Joel's rifle going quieter.
Your mind raced, rethinking your actions of running away. What if you'd misheard? What if Joel didn't have Ellie at all? What if they were all dead? Your lungs ached as you gasped for air, your eyes working harder to see as fires no longer lit up the night's darkness. "I knew I saw you." You froze, the voice behind you deep, almost teasing, as you slowly turned around, eyes wide. "Thought I was seein' things."
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 3k
Warnings: Violence, blood, mentions of SA, FINALLY DECENT AMOUNTS OF FLUFF, some angst, use of Y/N
A/N: omfg it's HAPPENING. Y/N/N = your nickname
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter ______________________________________________
YOU WANDERED AROUND THE ROOM, EYES SCANNING OVER WHAT WAS LEFT OF THE APARTMENT'S FURNISHINGS. Despite its age, it was definitely on the modern side, big abstract paintings with no life behind them, alongside boring black and white furniture. Behind you, Ellie laid out the old inflatable mattresses - not the best, but certainly better than the hard floor - whilst Joel scattered shattered glass around the front door. "Joel? Joel. Joel." Ellie repeated before finally gaining the man's attention. You sat down on your mattress, quietly listening to the two as you broke off part of an old granola bar, handing half to Ellie, the girl wordlessly accepting. "What are you doing?"
"I don't want someone sneakin' up on us while we're sleepin'," Joel explained as if it should have been obvious to the girl who had practically never left the safety of the QZ.
"Ohh, I get it. Crunch, crunch, crunch." She said, mouth full of food. "Are you sure you're gonna hear it?"
"Of course, I'll hear it. That's the damn point." The man said, his tone harsh.
"Okay. Well, goodnight." Ellie sighed. You turned to lie on your mattress between the two, Joel grunting as he put his jacket down as a makeshift pillow, muttering lowly. The three were silent for a few moments, Joel and Ellie facing the door whilst you lay on your back. "How did you guys know each other? Before- everything." Ellie questioned.
You looked at Joel for a moment, scanning his body language as best you could before looking back up. "We were friends... for a while." You muttered. "I, uh, knew his brother, too." None of it was wrong, but, for one reason or another, it felt wrong. Felt like a lie. Felt like there was more. Ellie hummed, drumming a tune against her stomach.
"Were you best friends?" The young girl added.
Despite her teasing tone, you answered after a moment. "I liked to think so." Unseen by both girls, Joel smiled. Albeit it was small, almost unnoticeable, but his cheeks lifted nonetheless. You heard the conversation shift over to Joel, but the exhaustion took over - along with the soft pounding coming from the back of your head -, your eyelids growing heavier until you couldn't keep them open, soft snores eventually escaping your lips.
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AS MUCH AS YOU TRIED TO STOP IT, YOU COULDN'T HELP BUT LET YOUR EYES WATER AT THE PAIN. Your cheek stung, a bruise already forming beneath your eye on the left side of your face as you glared up at the man through your lashes, eyes dark and cold. You had jumped for your gun, only inches away, when he whipped you with the butt of his pistol; you had noticed the slightest of hesitation in his movements. Ellie sat with her hands up in surrender, eyes wide, whilst Joel remained asleep. "Joel!" You yelled out, the man jumping slightly as he was startled awake.
The young boy standing over him put a finger to his lips. "Eyes on me. Eyes on me." The older man said. Joel scanned over both you and Ellie for a moment before doing so, watching the latter for just a moment longer as the two girls kept their hands up, facing him with the gun to the back of their heads. "You don't have to worry about what to say. We don't wanna hurt you. We wanna help you."
"Okay," Joel said, his voice monotone.
"Okay, um..." The man stuttered. You noted the way he spoke, the way he stood, as though his uncertainty penetrated deep within him, doubt and scepticism enveloping him. "I don't know what the next step is with something like this, but if I lower my gun... we didn't hurt you... so you don't hurt us... right?" He looked you up and down for a second, what seemed to be guilt consuming him for just a moment before he covered it back up.
"That's right." Joel half assed from where he lay on his back.
"That's a weird fuckin' tone, man." He almost cried.
"That's just the way he sounds. He has an asshole voice." Ellie rushed out. You kept quiet for the moment. "Joel, tell him he's okay."
Joel glared, his lips turned into a frown as his eyes bored into the man's. "Everything is great." He spoke, his tone, if anything, worse than it had been before.
"Dude," Ellie groaned.
"Joel." You scolded through gritted teeth.
"Fuck! Okay... listen... I'm gonna trust you." You watched curiously as he turned to the young boy, talking to him in - what you'd assumed to be - sign language, jumping slightly when he suddenly spoke up. "But if any of you guys try anything... yeah?" He threatened, gesturing with the gun held tightly in his grasp, which had started to grow increasingly unsteady.
You and Ellie muttered in agreement whilst Joel slowly blinked. The young boy moved off of Joel, his gun still aimed high as he attempted to make himself look more grown than he was. "Can I sit up?" Joel asked.
"Yeah. Slow. Get up slow." Your heart pounded in your chest as you followed Joel's gaze, the two speaking silently, his eyes landing on the bruising of your cheek.
"Who are you?" Joel spoke as he turned back to the man, his hands were raised, back straight and stiff, ready to jump up if need be.
"My name's Henry." He answered reluctantly. "That's my brother, Sam. I'm the most wanted man in Kansas City. Although right now... my guess is you're running a close second." He spoke as he slowly lowered his gun, the air growing silent.
You and Joel soon found your thighs pressed together as you sat side by side, both adults staring at Sam and Henry across from them, albeit the man's eyes much darker than yours. A small lamp sat between the two grounds, the sounds of chewing filling the room as they chewed the old, mostly tasteless food. You listened quietly as Ellie asked questions from the other side of Joel, her newfound curiosity reminding you of when they'd first met way back in the QZ. "I'm Ellie." She introduced.
You scanned over Henry once more - the man too busy signing to his brother to notice - before speaking. "I'm Y/N." You said, your voice coming out slightly flat and hesitant as you attempted to concretise your opinion on the man.
"I'm Joel." He announced, only after being smacked on the knee by Ellie. "Look, you ate, we didn't kill each other, let's call this a win-win and move on."
"Well, I'm betting... that y'all came up here to get a view of the city and plan a way out." Henry started. The lamp shone somewhat brightly, lighting up the room just enough so that they could see each other clearly, see the red mask painted onto Sam's face along with the look of concern on Henry's. The look of apprehension. "And when the sun's up... I'll show you one." They went silent for a while, the creaks and groans of the old apartment building suddenly growing louder. "I'm sorry, by the way. For your face." Henry said, looking at you apologetically. You nodded, softening your eyes for just a moment.
You weren't one to put your life into the hands of strangers so easily, but something about the two made you want to trust them. Unlike the boy Joel had killed earlier in the day, you had grown certain about your feelings of pity for the two. Sam was young, the boy still holding a deep sense of innocence within him as he looked for the best in people where he could. His face paint only concreted the fact, the boy mimicking that of a superhero from an action movie you had seen playing on your television twenty-something years ago. Henry, though older, had the same spark in his eye. Though duller than his brother's, it was there, shining especially bright when he looked at Sam.
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"WELCOME TO KILLA CITY." The three adults looked out the window at the city below, the streets barren, buildings crumbling and rusted. Joel stood in the middle with Henry on his right, you on his left. Behind them, Ellie and Sam sat at the long, used-to-be conference table, conversing amongst themselves to distract themselves from the 'boring' adults' conversation.
"No FEDRA," Joel muttered.
"Not as of ten days ago, no," Henry confirmed. You looked out at the view with a look of uncertainty, your heart pounding within your chest as you pondered what you were committing to.
"We always heard KC FEDRA was-"
"Monsters? Savages? Yeah, you heard right." Henry nodded, Joel watching him with furrowed brows. "Raped and tortured and murdered people for twenty years." You blinked, flexing your fingers at your side as you stared out. "And you know what happens when you do that to people? The moment they get a chance, they do it right back at you."
"But you're not FEDRA." Joel half-questioned, half-stated.
"No... worse. I'm a collaborator."
Joel physically recoiled, stepping back, almost stumbling into you beside him as he spoke. You whipped your head to look at the dark-skinned man. "I don't work with rats." You placed your hand on his bicep, stepping forward to get a better view of Henry.
"Just hang on, Joel."
"Yeah, you fucking do." You and Henry spoke over one another. You looked past Joel, scanning the young man as you tried to read his body language, his tone. "Today you do... 'cause I live here and you don't. That's how I followed you here. I know this city, and that's how I'm gonna help you get out." He stated, looking between you and Joel.
"Why help us?" Joel asked suspiciously.
"I saw what you did... the way you killed those men. Now, I know where to go, but I don't know how to make it through alive, not if it's just me and Sam." The two men almost stood off against one another, Henry's tone certain as he knew Joel couldn't say no, not with you and Ellie at risk.
"You seem capable enough. You're armed."
"You're wrong, and wrong. Never killed anyone. Pointing an unloaded gun at you and getting you to step off was the closest I've ever come to being violent." Henry spoke, looking at you for a moment, his eyes landing on the bruise beneath your eye, pulsating as it stung at your face. "So that's the deal. I show the way... you clear the way."
The three adults diverted their attention at the sound of laughter, Sam and Ellie sitting across the room, giggling and chuckling just as it should be. "Haven't heard that in a long time." Henry said with a smile.
Joel sighed, shaking his head as he looked out the window for a moment. His eyes landed on you as you turned away from the kids and to him. Their eyes danced, Joel contemplating quietly as your eyes grew softer, your head tilting as you sighed so quietly it almost went unheard. "So how are we gettin' out?" He turned to Henry. You watched him for a moment longer before turning along with him.
You leant against the table as Henry drew out his plan on a blank piece of paper, standing next to Henry, whilst Joel and Ellie stood across from them. "Highways... downtown. Us." He explained, his fingers prancing across the page. "This whole area belongs to Kathleen."
"She's in charge?" Ellie questioned.
"Leader of the resistance along with her second, Mike. He follows her like a lost puppy but he's not incapable. You can see the way we're bounded by highways. They got people posted all around the inside perimeter. If we get close, we get caught. No question." Henry spoke, his tone certain. "So how do we get across?" The man went silent, hitting his hand against the table to gain his brother's attention. The three watched Henry sign in anticipation, the man snapping his fingers as Sam held up his board. 'Tunnels.' "Boom."
"Kansas City has a subway?" Joel said, confused. Your brows furrowed as you listened to Henry, your mind racing as you tried to comprehend his... interesting, plan. "You're right. It's a great plan." Joel started in response to the man's evident self-confidence. "So what do you need us for?"
Henry paused, bouncing on the balls of his feet and licking his parched lips before he spoke. "You noticed anything strange about this city? I mean, other than the strange shit you've already seen?"
"No Infected?" Ellie spoke up.
"Oh, there's Infected. Just not on the surface. FEDRA drove them underground fifteen years ago, and never let them come back up. It's the only good thing those fascist motherfuckers ever did." He said. You sighed as you rubbed your temples, clicking your tongue whilst you stepped away from the table.
"So you want us goin' into a tunnel?" Joel's voice grew more stern, the creases between his eyebrows growing deeper.
"Everyone thinks that it's full of Infected, including Kathleen, which means that we're not gonna be running into any of her people. But you see, what I know is... it's empty." He said confidently.
"And you believed him?" You questioned, doubting the man's words thanks to FEDRA's history of honesty - or more so, lack thereof.
"You've been down there?" Joel asked.
At that, his assertiveness crumbled, stumbling with his words as he attempted to reassure the increasingly irritated Joel. "No, but the FEDRA guy that I worked with told me that it's clean, completely clean. They cleared it out. All of it."
"When?" Ellie asked, looking at Henry dully, the dark circles beneath her eyes growing more evident from her lack of sleep and exhaustion.
"Like... three years ago." Joel scoffed, shaking his head at both you and Ellie, as you looked at Henry with a singular raised eyebrow. "Okay, maybe, there's one or two, but you handle it."
"What if there's more?"
"Or one of those blind ones that sees like a bat?" The young girl added, not allowing her positive opinion on Sam to overrule the ultimately dangerous plan they were stepping into.
Henry paused, looking at the girl with big eyes as he pointed. "Wait, you... you ran into a Clicker?" He questioned.
"Two of 'em." She corrected.
"And you're still alive. You see?" He spoke, using the girl's words in his favour as he looked back at you and Joel with raised brows. "You're the right people. If it gets bad down there, we turn around, and run right back out the same way we came." Henry was quick as he spoke, growing more desperate to see heads nod and the sounds of agreement.
Joel leaned back, his voice harsh. "Oh, that's your great plan?" He mouthed off.
"No, that's my dicey-as-fuck plan. But as far as I can tell... it's our only shot." Sam banged his fist against the table as he signed to his older brother, Henry, speaking aloud as he responded. "They're saying they're going to help us escape." You couldn't help but sigh at the man's low blow, announcing to the young kid that they'd help despite the hesitation that filled the three of them. "Right?" He added smugly, looking up at Joel.
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THE DOOR CREAKED AS YOU STEPPED OUTSIDE, YOUR EYES MET WITH JOEL'S BACK TURNED AWAY FROM YOU, HIS ARMS FOLDED AGAINST HIS CHEST WITH ALL YOU COULD ASSUME TO BE A FROWN PAINTED ONTO HIS FACE. You pushed the door closed most of the way behind you as you stepped to stand beside him, the two so close their arms brushed against one another with each breath they took. "I dunno 'bout this." The man grumbled, eyes still locked onto the hallway ahead of him, his feet shifting upon the dull brown carpet.
You sighed, biting your bottom lip before looking at him. "I don't trust people easily, Joel. Not anymore." You started, turning to look at Henry and Sam through the crack of the door, the kid sitting with Ellie as they played whilst Henry watched on with a soft look. "They seem good." You almost whispered. "The kid, he... they're good." Joel looked at you, scanning your eyes as he took in your words, eventually giving you a slow nod.
The two remained where they stood, only this time their eyes remained locked onto one another as they stood face to face. "You called me Your Nickname," you said, your voice soft. Joel furrowed his brows. "Back in the truck." You hummed. Joel thought back to the moment; he hadn't even noticed it, the name having slipped from his lips so easily that it felt natural. Normal, even. He didn't deny it, didn't even try to play it off; rather, he accepted it.
Your face stung slightly as Joel lifted his hand to cradle your jaw, his thumb lightly brushing over the bruise beneath your eye socket. "Are we doin' this?" He questioned, part of him already knowing the answer. You nodded, blinking rapidly as you looked between his eyes. "Alright." He muttered lowly.
Something had changed. The man could feel it. The guttural fear he felt the moment he'd woken up to find you - and Ellie - in danger. If it had happened when you'd first found each other, sure, he would have been anxious, but this was different. The sight of you faced with a life-threatening danger moved something deep within him that hadn't been touched in years. He was terrified.
Your breath hitched slightly as Joel moved forward, his lips pressing softly against yours. It wasn't deep or steamy, but it was certain. Reassuring to the both of them. His lips were warm against yours, slightly chapped but soft nonetheless, as his hand drew tighter against your jaw. Your eyes fluttered closed as your hand lifted to hold the right side of the man's neck, feeling his heart pound loudly beneath the thin skin.
Joel's hand against the small of your back guided you closer, leaving you slightly shocked as you hadn't even registered when he'd placed it there. Your skin felt hot just as Joel's did against your own, your mind too busy racing to register whether it was visible in the flush of your face. Something Joel had practically begged for twenty years ago, and something he'd only dreamt of within the past two decades you'd been gone, finally took action. It felt unreal, felt like a hallucination he'd find himself waking up to within the following few moments, but he didn't. When they pulled apart, their eyes melted together, silently reassuring one another that it was true. That it was real.
Pairing: Joel Miller x Wife!Reader, Tommy Miller x Sister-in-Law!Reader
WC: 1.1k
Summary: You felt him, saw him, heard him. He was there in every sense but the reality. The idea of what could have been, what should have been, haunted you. Haunted you in a way, it made you forget who you were leaving behind.
Warnings: Major character death, blood, angst, fluff if you squint (but not really), mentions of malnourishment, use of Y/N.
A/N: Oh how i love angst
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Masterlist | REQUESTS OPEN
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"WHY ARE YOU CRYING?" His voice was rough, but not the type he'd use to intimidate; instead, the rough, gravely voice you'd gotten used to waking up to. You hadn't noticed the warmth streaking down your face before, the tears that had accumulated a little too quickly now falling rapidly.
Your head shook, a soft, almost scared smile welcoming itself onto your face. "I just wish we could stay like this." You spoke, voice cracking partway through. His hand sat upon your waist as you lay in your shared bed, the sun slowly rising through the sheer curtains. The curls of his hair fell in a way you'd never forget, framing his face as though it were a piece of art. You lay on your sides, hands touching one another, never wanting to let go.
"We can." He said in almost a whisper. Though instead of the smile he'd expected you to show, he found a frown, your hand lifting to hold the side of his head, gently swiping his wrinkled skin as you whispered.
"You're bleeding." No matter how you tried to wipe away the blood, it kept trickling. More and more until the entire left side of his face wept the deep red liquid. "Joel!" You cried out, eyes wide as you sat up to straddle him, desperately pulling at his hair in attempts to find the source.
His voice was different as he spoke, darker, less nurturing. "You couldn't save me." A scream tore through your throat as you shot up, your left hand jumping to the other side of the bed, the emptiness it found uninviting. You scanned your other hand, unsure of whether the lack of blood made you feel better or worse. The sight lingered, your mind's eye flashing from the way he lay in your dreams, to the sight of him half covered with a white tarp, motionless, dead.
You knew your mind was playing tricks on you, just as it had been for the past month. Making you dream of the man you yearned to see, only to rip him from you all over. You sniffled as your tears fell, just as in your dream, the crying was true, but Joel, his presence, was just another sick lie.
You jumped at the sound of knocking, the sound of the front door creaking open downstairs, just reaching your ears. You knew who it was, what he wanted. You expected him. But it didn't mean you wanted to see him. The bed groaned as you reluctantly sat up, abandoning the idea of falling back asleep in hopes of seeing Joel again, the same idea you'd given in to countless times before.
His jacket found itself wrapped around your shoulders just as it had been every other day, his scent slowly dissipating, much to your dismay. "I brought you food." Tommy's voice sounded out reluctantly as he spotted you descending the staircase. His brows furrowed at the sight of the full containers of food covering the tabletop, his previous attempts at providing you a warm meal, though it didn't surprise him.
"How's Ellie?" You breathed out, the sound of your voice barely audible to the man. As much as you found yourself disappointed at yourself for the fact, you used the girl as your scapegoat; a less confronting conversation than the one you knew you'd need to face. You ignored the food, just as you had the day before, and the day before that, despite the grumbling of your stomach.
"She's, uh, doin' better," Tommy groused, picking at the back of the chair as he shifted his weight, almost uncomfortable in the once home, now house, that he'd spent nights in sharing family dinners only months earlier. You nodded, staring at the floor as though even a moment of eye contact with the man would cause you to turn to stone.
He looked you up and down, sighing softly as he knew the struggle of the inevitable conversation that he'd given up on halfway through every day before. "You gotta eat." He practically whispered, though despite the gentleness of his tone, you only scoffed.
"I don't have to do anything..." You spoke beneath your breath, turning to walk away and lie back in bed to spend your day chasing the moment of peace you found in your dreams before they turned for the worse.
"You're not just hurtin' yourself, Y/N." He said, his tone more stern than it had been moments before. The words made you freeze, unfamiliar, unsaid, new. "What about Ellie? When she comes back to find you like this. Wasting away." Tommy continued, gesturing at your dehydrated, malnourished form despite your turned back. "What about Benji? Or Maria." He added. "What about me?"
The man's voice broke, desperate to have you back. To have his friend back. You were partially grateful for the fact that your back was turned to him, the position shielding your wet cheeks, though he could see the way you shook with each cry. "I can't, Tommy."
"I need ya. I lost my brother, I can't lose you. Please." You bit your trembling bottom lip until it soaked itself with warm blood, eyebrows clenched as you contemplated. He'd pleaded with you before, but not like this. The guilt ate away at you; it always had in a way. The idea that you were leaving your husband's brother to mourn alone. You'd both lost a half of yourselves, you knew you'd never get back.
Slowly, reluctantly, you turned, your red, tear-filled eyes quickly finding Tommy's. "I'm not- I'm not the person you need me to be." You admitted. You were unstable. You knew that. Anyone could see it. The way you hadn't left your house since burying Joel, the way you froze at even the smallest thing that could have reminded you of him. The townspeople had seen - on the rare occasions you'd leave the cold of your bed - the way you'd stare out your window, watching couples pass by as you thought of what could have been.
The man shook his head, sniffling as he tried to bury his own tears. "It don't matter. I just need you." The warmth of his arms around you was different to that of what you'd felt for the past month. It was real. The cold, vacant warmth you'd felt in your dreams, though relieving in the moment, wasn't enough. This, it stayed. It lingered in a way you didn't realise you needed. The mystery of lack played at you, teased you as you zoned in on the emptiness of your husband, leaving you to turn on the love you still had left. The love that needed you just as you needed it.
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 3.2k
Warnings: Violence, blood, death, angst, some fluff, use of Y/N.
A/N: im so excited for the upcoming angst... Y/N/N = your nickname
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter ______________________________________________
"SOMETHIN' DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT, JOEL," You muttered beneath your breath, your hand tightly gripping the back of Ellie's seat as you looked out the front windshield. Joel's eyes darted around the streets as he navigated the new city filled with rubble and destroyed cars. Ellie attempted to read the map as best she could. They were never even supposed to be in the city in the first place; what had been an attempt at taking a detour rather than circling back to get past the blocked tunnel had turned into an entire ordeal you weren't sure you'd get out of. "Give it here." You said, grabbing the map from Ellie before she could respond.
"Where the fuck do I go, Y/N/N?" Joel strained, feeling more uncertain by the second as his knuckles turned white due to his grip on the wheel.
"I don't know, I think right, but for all we fucken' know that'll be blocked too." You breathed out as you scanned the map, your finger tracing the streets marked on the paper. Your hand lifted, quickly holding onto the back of Ellie's seat as you braced yourself for Joel's sudden brake as per the young girl's request.
"Is that the QZ?" She questioned, looking over to see the well-and-truly abandoned QZ gates. "Where the fuck is FEDRA?"
The two adults were silent. You murmured Joel's name beneath your breath when they heard a yell. "Hey!" The man hobbled in the middle of the road, clutching onto his seemingly wounded abdomen as he stumbled closer to the truck. "Please help!"
"Put your seatbelt on," Joel ordered, though, you were already in the midst of doing so.
"Aren't we gonna help him?" Ellie blinked as she blindly buckled herself in, eyes staring ahead.
"No."
The map that you had grasped tightly only moments ago went forgotten beside you as you desperately scanned your surroundings for more threats - of which you found many. "Joel!" Ellie screamed moments before a cinder block found itself hitting the windshield.
Your arm snaked around Ellie's seat to hold onto her, clutching the young girl tightly in hopes it would somehow keep her safe as they smashed through the front of a laundromat; the truck coming to a sudden stop, much to their dismay. "Are you okay?" Joel questioned.
"Yeah." Ellie breathed out, you humming out an 'okay'.
"You're not hurt? Nothin'?" The man stressed.
"I don't think so." Joel's concern was cut off at the sound of gunfire. The three quickly unbuckled their belts to take cover against the side of the wrecked truck, bullets ricocheting off the opposite side of the vehicle. You grabbed onto both yours and Joel's guns from the backseat, handing the man his before grasping onto yours, jumping slightly at the sound of bullets hitting nearby, all of which were uncomfortably close by.
"Hey, you see that hole? Can you squeeze through?" Joel asked Ellie. The decently sized hole in the wall almost stared at the three, insulation peeking out, leaving a gate to the next room over. To a pocket of safety.
You peeked through the car window as best you could, spotting a couple of men before ducking back down, just missing a bullet to the skull by a hair. "When I say go, you crawl to that wall, and you squeeze through, and you don't come out until we say, okay?" The man ordered.
You saw the fear on Ellie's face, uncertainty filling the young girl's body. "Joel and I will cover you, okay? You'll be okay. You'll be safe." You added.
"You stay down, you stay low, you stay quiet." Your ears rang at each gunshot, repeatedly readjusting your weapon in attempts to get a comfortable grip, hoping that doing so would relieve at least an ounce of the stress you'd felt. "Go!" The man suddenly yelled out, Ellie scurrying to crawl on the ground whilst the two adults peeked over the car - Joel over the truck bed and you over the hood - to shoot at the hunters.
You panted heavily as the gunfire slowed, catching Ellie finally slip into the wall in the corner of your eye as you ducked down. Too focused on listening out for more bullets, you jumped slightly when Joel grasped onto you, his hand wrapping around your upper arm to pull you to cover behind an old washing machine.
You stared at him, silently conversing through your eyes, confused as to what he was doing; though, he simply responded with a finger pressed against his lips. With every movement, the rubble beneath your feet crunched, cringing at the sound. You could hear footsteps as they neared closer, your eyes scrunching shut. Joel's knee pressed against yours, grounding you for a moment before he stood up, a single gunshot ringing through the old building. "Jesus Christ..." You muttered beneath your breath as you stood up, scanning the man's body from where you stood whilst Joel attempted to reload his rifle.
You knew you should have been able to stop him. You should have heard him coming, should have been able to aim your weapon in time. But you didn't. You felt the butt of the kid's gun hit your nose, your body falling back until your head hit the hard floor beneath. You felt warmth on your face as blood streamed from your nose, groans escaping your lips as your vision blurred and your head pounded.
You gasped for breath as you attempted to regain your composure, hands and knees stinging as you shakily stood back up. You moaned slightly in a desperate attempt to snap out of your daze, the sound of Joel's boots scuffing against the ground momentarily bringing you back to your senses. With your mind racing and your head still foggy, your gun went forgotten, your hands instead going straight for the young man's throat.
Your body slammed into him, pushing him off of Joel after what had felt like an eternity. Joel gurgled, deep gasps escaping his lips as he gulped down air like it were his lifeline - which, it was. You desperately wrapped your fingers around the kid's neck, oxygen flying past your lips as he threw you against the floor close beside Joel. It was almost embarrassing; two grown adults against one kid. Key word, almost.
You saw Joel trying to collect himself in the corner of your eye, though you were too focused on the boy aiming his gun at you; you were certain you were moments away from death. But when you heard the gunshot, there was no pain to follow. The boy fell on his back right beside you as you scrambled up to see Ellie with a shaking pistol in her grasp. "No, no, no, no, no! It's okay. It's okay." The kid begged. "It's over. We're not fighting anymore." He cried.
Part of you felt bad, the tears in his eyes, the obvious fear underlining his voice. "I'm gonna go home. I'll tell everyone you're good." He pleaded with Ellie. You picked up your gun, reloading the weapon whilst your eyes remained locked onto the boy, only jumping to Joel every few seconds to ensure he was alive. "I don't know what to do. My legs don't work." The boy cried. Though Ellie was looking at him, she wasn't really; her mind was elsewhere, far, far away, playing over what she had done. "My Mom isn't far, if you could get me to her." He looked at you and Joel in fear, his eyes wide as Joel slowly stood up, knowing his time on Earth was wearing thin.
No matter how hard you tried to commit to the part of you that felt bad, you just couldn't. You knew the boy; knew his type. What he did, what he would have done. "We could trade with you guys. We could be friends. I didn't know. I'm Bryan. I'm Bryan. What's your name?"
"Ellie, give me the gun," You ordered, shutting down the boys' attempts at creating a 'friendship', though he continued to beg. Joel took the weapon from Ellie before you could, tucking it into the back of his waistband.
"Wait, wait, wait." He cried, taking the knife from its sheath on his hip and dropping it beside him. "You can have it... It's a good knife." His body was still plastered to the floor, his hands grasping at nothing in particular, whilst his legs remained motionless.
Joel picked up the blade, turning to Ellie, his eyes cold, dark. "Get back behind the wall." He commanded.
"No, no, no, no! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" He knew. Bryan knew Ellie was his last chance. His only saviour. He knew that the moment she hid behind that wall, he'd meet his end. "Please, please. We could just talk. I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" His screams grew louder when Ellie turned away, your hand guiding her for a moment before her movements continued independently, growing faster and faster, desperate to get away from the violence.
You watched as Joel neared closer, his eyebrows furrowed as the boy begged, pleaded for a second chance he knew would never come. Your eyes shut tightly as he called out desperately for his mother, his voice breaking until he went silent. The knife in Joel's hand dug into his skull, causing for a dull thump to echo out, one last gasp escaping past the boy's lips.
__________
JOEL GENTLY WIPED AWAY AT THE SOMEWHAT DRIED BLOOD DRIPPING FROM YOUR NOSE, CRADLING YOUR HEAD TO PULL IT FORWARD, SCANNING OVER THE BACK OF YOUR HEAD AS BEST HE COULD FOR ANY INJURIES YOU MAY HAVE SUSTAINED WHEN YOU'D HIT THE LAUNDROMAT FLOOR. Eventually, reluctantly, he pulled away, turning to the window to scan the streets, silently trying to configure a plan as to how they could escape the store they'd taken refuge in out of desperation. Once he'd turned away, shaky breaths escaped your lips as you attempted to stretch out your left leg, the limb aching, sending shooting pains throughout your body.
Your back was against the wall, looking to your left now and again to peek through the newspapers covering the storefront's window. "They're not FEDRA, and they're not Fireflies, so who are they?" Ellie questioned from behind Joel, the man crouched down as he looked out at the busy streets filled with people scanning each building with anything but good intentions.
"People."
"Are we okay in here?"
"For a little bit, maybe. Looks like they're checkin' out apartment buildings first. But they'll be coming through these places soon enough." The man explained before turning away from the window, eyes soon landing on you. "Are you right?" He questioned, gesturing to your leg, which he'd found you practically cradling, more concern laced within his tone than he had meant for there to be.
You nodded, though slightly uncertain. "M' fine. Just my leg... the crash must've messed with it." You muttered beneath your breath, jumping slightly at the sudden sensation of Joel's hand on your calf. The man pulled your leg forward, scanning for any visible injuries before helping you stretch out the muscles in hopes that it'd help. Behind them, Ellie continued to scan outside the store, silently taking note of the two adults' actions.
You hadn't noticed it before, though you assumed it had likely been the adrenaline of being shot at that covered up the now infuriating pain that just didn't seem to let up. "There's a really tall building, like, four blocks away." The girl spoke up.
"Yeah. Saw it." Joel grunted from where he was crouched.
"So that's the one?"
"As soon as we don't hear a truck, we move," Joel explained briefly, concerned eyes scanning over you before he stood up and took a seat on the chair beside you. "Fast as we can." Ellie sat against the wall across from you and Joel, her knees pulled up to her chest as close as she could get them, her tone soft as she spoke.
"Are you okay?" She questioned Joel, seeing the clear levels of stress painted onto his face as he massaged his temples.
"I'm all right." He responded a little too quickly. "Are you all right?" His tone was robotic, as though he was uncertain of if what he was saying was correct.
"Yeah."
You took your bottom lip between your teeth, gnawing at the flesh until it bled softly. "I'm sorry." You muttered, looking up at the young girl for a moment. "We shouldn't have made you..." Your voice trailed off, unsure of how to continue.
"Thing is, is I didn't hear that guy comin', and... you shouldn't have had to... You know?" Joel stammered.
"Well, you're glad I did, right?" You opened your mouth only to close it again. You wanted to say no. To say that she shouldn't have left that room. Shouldn't have shot the kid. But then again, if she hadn't, you would have likely been dead.
"You're just a kid. You shouldn't know what it means to-" Joel trailed off, looking anywhere but at Ellie. "It's not like you killed him. But... shootin' or- I know what it's like... first time that you, uh, hurt... someone like that. If you, uh... w- uh-" He sighed. "I'm not good at this." Joel breathed out.
"Yeah, you really aren't." As much as you wanted to chime in, tell the girl that you were there for her to talk, to help her, you couldn't. You'd been alone for the majority of the past twenty years; those you weren't, you weren't exactly with people you could confide in, nor had they confided in you - in a way that was normal, anyway.
Even before that, before the world went to shit, you never truly confided in anyone like you probably should have. Not like how Ellie needed. And if that was the case, how could you be any better help than Joel? "I mean, it was my fault." The man's voice grew stronger, more certain. "You shouldn't have had to. And I'm sorry."
You watched with furrowed brows as Ellie sniffled, wiping away the soft tears that trickled down her face roughly with the edge of her sleeve. "It wasn't my first time." She admitted, the two adults watching her, you with concern and Joel more so confusion.
You watched as Joel reluctantly handed Ellie the pistol. In another life, another world, you would have scolded the man for giving her a gun. But all you could see was the man he was. As much as he'd like to deny it, Joel cared. More than he knew he should. The way he guided her, showed her how to use the weapon; there was a familiar warmth beneath his tone. You couldn't help but smile, the sound of Ellie's soft laughter warming up the once-cold and harsh room. "Uh-uh. You put it in your pack. You'll shoot your damn ass off."
Whilst Joel stood up to clear away the door, prepping for their escape, you and Ellie shared a look. You held a soft smile on your face whilst Ellie looked back at you with genuine excitement. It was odd. You hadn't known Ellie all that well, and yet you held a genuine likeness for one another.
You had treated her like a person, sure. Before, that had been a scarce response to the young girl's 'condition'. But now, it was different. There was a sense of nurture, a type of care you shown for her that she'd never really felt. You cared. To you, Ellie grounded you in a way that Joel couldn't. She showed you the innocence that was still present within the world. She gave you a purpose.
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YOU LOOKED AROUND THE ALLEYWAY CAUTIOUSLY, RIFLE IN HAND, AS JOEL GAVE ELLIE A BOOST UP THROUGH THE SMALL WINDOW LEADING INTO THE TALL BUILDING. It was dark, the streets much quieter than they had been only hours earlier. But even then, it was risky. You cringed at every crash from the other side of the wall, your heart beating rapidly within your chest until Ellie finally opened the door. "Where would you guys be without me, huh?" Ellie teased.
"By now, Wyoming." Joel teased back, though his tone was much harder to decipher. You snickered as you went in after Joel, scanning the room with squinted eyes. "All right. We'll make our way up, and come morning, I'll take a look at the city, and find our way out."
Ellie kept between you and Joel, the latter staying in front as they went through the doors into the main stairway cautiously. "We're goin' up forty-two flights?" Ellie questioned, looking up at the daunting whirlpool of stairs.
"Forty-five." The man corrected. "But no... not all the way."
"How far?"
"As far as I can make it." Ellie laughed slightly at the man, stepping back as you and him took the first steps up. Joel walked on the left side of the staircase, his hand hovering lightly over your lower back, guiding you to the right so that you could hold onto the more secure railing. His eyes drifted to your leg now and again, brows furrowing when he saw it shake slightly at every other step.
The three had only made it a couple of flights when you paused to catch your breath, Joel waiting for you to regain your composure before continuing. Ellie caught the two conversing more than once, though not through sound, but through looks; the way Joel would look at you with a type of concern she'd never seen before, you simply nodding in response, somehow knowing exactly what the man was trying to say. "Hey, you know that guy who said he was hurt?" Ellie spoke up. "How did you know it was an ambush?"
Joel paused, his breathing heavy from exhaustion. "I've been on both sides. It was a long time ago. We did what we needed to survive." He continued in attempts to justify his actions, more so to you than to Ellie. You looked at the man, tilting your head down slightly; the simple action helped Joel feel marginally better about himself, part of him having been certain that you were going to turn heel and run.
"You and Tess?"
"And the people we were with. My brother, too." Joel looked up, silently calculating how many more flights he could handle before his legs gave out on him, absentmindedly including you in the calculations too.
"Did you kill innocent people?" Despite the depth of the question, Ellie's tone was almost innocent. The man paused, looking at Ellie for a few moments before turning away.
"C'mon." He said, continuing up the stairs.
Ellie blew air from between her lips before turning her questions to you. "How 'bout you?" She asked. You pondered your answer, Joel silently watching you, also curious.
"Mostly people who deserved it." You stated, though the answer only made Ellie more curious.
"What'd they do-" Before she could continue, Joel cut her off.
"Right 'ere." He grumbled, opening the door cautiously before leading the two through.
"Holy shit." Ellie panted, Joel muttering a 'yeah' as he slid his back down the wall, taking deep gulps of air. You simply planted your hand flat against the wall, closing your eyes as you attempted to catch your breath, popping your hip out to put the majority of your weight onto your right leg in hopes of giving your left a break. "Thirty-three floors. That's good."
"It's gonna have to be," Joel muttered.
"Come on." Ellie held a hand out to Joel, the girl looking down at him expectantly.
"Gimme a minute." He almost pleaded, baffled as to how the girl was still going strong.
"Get up, you lazy ass."
Joel's eyebrows were furrowed as he reluctantly took the girl's hand, grunting as he got up from the floor that he was certain had gotten lower. "Lazy ass." He grumbled. "Fifty-six years old, you little shit." He sassed, earning a laugh from both you and Ellie.
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 3.2k
Warnings: Mentions of death, angst, some fluff, insinuated SA, no use of Y/N.
A/N: Actual moments of romance? Whats happening to me
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter ______________________________________________
DESPITE BEING SQUEEZED INTO THE UNCOMFORTABLE BACKSEAT, NOTHING COULD WIPE THE WIDE SMILE OFF ELLIE'S FACE. You watched on with a slight smirk as she leaned forward to play with the buttons on the truck's console, head whipping around at the sight of every little feature anyone else would turn a blind eye to. "It's your first time in a car?" Joel questioned.
"It's like a spaceship."
"No, it's like a piece of shit Chevy S10, but it'll get us there... I think." He breathed out. You pushed your body back so that Ellie could reach forward more easily, the girl still fiddling around.
"Can I sit in the front?" Ellie asked you. Joel responded before you got the chance.
"No." He said as he shook his head, reaching back for his seatbelt. "She'll get motion sick. Seatbelt." He ordered, his words more so directed at Ellie than you. You couldn't help but stare at him, his words shocking you momentarily. The fact was true, but that wasn't what confused you. Instead, it was the fact that he remembered. What felt to you to be an obscure fact you'd forget yourself occasionally was remembered by a man you hadn't seen for two decades.
You shook your head as you broke out of your trance-like state, watching as Joel reached over to the back seat to show Ellie the seatbelt. "So cool." She muttered beneath her breath as she clicked it in. Ellie kept her body leaned forward as she watched Joel get the car started, the girl soon enough leaning back again to explore the backseat, pulling out an old mixtape from the pocket behind your seat.
"Would ya leave it?" Joel asked dull-ly as you simply watched Ellie lean forward to put the tape into the radio. Joel gave you a slight look as you simply put your hands up in surrender, as the man was too busy pulling out of the garage to do anything. "Put it back... Ellie." Once the song started playing, Ellie furrowed her brows, the music sounding dull to her ears. The girl reached to take the mixtape out before she was stopped by Joel. "Oh, no, wait. No, leave it. Leave it. Oh, this is good. This is Linda Ronstadt. Do you know who Linda Ronstadt is?"
"You know I don't know who Linda Ronstadt is." Ellie sassed.
You gave him a look, one brow raised. "She's never seen a car, but you think she knows who Linda Ronstadt is?" You chuckled softly. Joel couldn't help but let a slight smile escape, no matter how hard he tried to hide it, shaking his head softly.
"Oh, man." He continued.
"Eh. It's better than nothing."
'Wait for the day. You'll go away.' The radio sang, the remote in Joel's hand beeping as he opened the outermost gate of Bill's compound. 'Knowin' that you warned me of the price I'd have to pay. And life's full of loss. Who knows the cost.' You watched in the side mirrors as Bill and Frank's house grew further and further away. Despite how the house had grown run down, it reminded you of what once was. What could have been. Many years ago.
The three sat in silence until a light hum sounded from Ellie. "Here." She grunted as she reached forward yet again. "Found another." She said, pulling out the 'Silk Purse' tape and pushing in a new one. It took a few moments for the song to start up, but once it did, both you and Joel tensed; Ellie instead groaned, slightly disappointed at the song.
'I look to you to see the truth.' The tape played. You slowly reached forward to turn the volume higher as Mazzy Star's voice sang out. The two adults shared a look, their eyes dancing around one another as their mouths were kept shut. 'You live your life, you go in shadows.' Just for a moment, they were thirty-something years old again. Standing in the middle of nowhere, darkness surrounding them as they found comfort in one another.
Ellie's brows furrowed as she watched both of you, the girl trying to gauge what the notable reactions were for. "What, did you two screw to this or somethin'?" She questioned somewhat rhetorically.
You tsk'd the girl, letting out a sigh as you turned to look out the window, Joel watching you for a moment longer before looking back ahead, clearing his throat. "You're a sick kid." You said.
"Mhm," Ellie responded almost happily, looking around the backseat for more to mess around with.
__________
"I WANNA SEE A TANK," Ellie exclaimed, looking at the cars pushed to the side of the road through the back window. You sat - rather uncomfortably - in the front seat, letting out a long sigh as you stared at the long road ahead. You zoned out the larger majority of Ellie and Joel's conversations of which mostly consisted of Ellie asking a long string of questions and Joel answering with his dull tone. You'd hardly even noted the presence of music, Hank Williams' voice only just ringing through your ears.
Your head shook at the sound of Joel's almost desperate voice, taking a moment to centre yourself before noticing what was happening. "Oh. No, no, no. Put that back. That's not for kids. Ellie." Joel rushed out. Your eyes widened at the sight of the... interesting magazine, quickly turning around in your seat to try to take it from the young girl.
"How would he even walk around with that thing?" Ellie exclaimed with her mouth wide open.
"Please get rid of it." Joel practically begged.
"Ellie, give me that," You complained.
"Hold on now, you'll get your turn," Ellie said to you, hardly looking away from the pages.
You sat back in your seat with an annoyed sigh as your face grew slightly warm. "Why are all these pages stuck together?" She questioned. You and Joel shared a look. Joel stammered as he tried to come up with a response, whilst you simply rubbed your temple with wide eyes. "I'm just fuckin' with ya. Bye-bye, dude!" She called as she threw the magazine out the window.
"You're a little shit sometimes, you know that?" You said whilst turning to look at Ellie, the girl sticking her tongue out at you.
__________
THE TREES AROUND THE THREE TOWERED OVER THEM; THE WOODS A SAFE ENOUGH SPOT TO CAMP FOR THE NIGHT, IN HOPES THEY COULD REGAIN AS MUCH ENERGY AS THEY COULD. You watched with an eyebrow raised as Ellie stuffed as much food in her mouth at once as she could.It wasn't the nicest meal you'd ever had, that's for sure, but it was better than cold beans from the can. "So, can we start a fire? I'm freezing." Ellie complained, Joel's harshness almost surprising her.
"Now, why am I gonna tell you no?"
"Because Infected will see the smoke."
"No. Fungus isn't that smart. This is too remote for Infected, anyway." Joel noted.
"People?" Ellie was almost surprised. Her eyes were wide as she looked between you and Joel, who sat just a couple feet apart from one another. "So what are they gonna do? Rob us?"
You tensed, the fork in your hand freezing just before reaching your mouth, your throat growing tight. "Oh, they'll have way more in mind than that."
"Okay." Ellie dragged out, unsure of what to say. You placed your plate down quietly, your once-heaving appetite quickly disappearing. The already cold woods grew colder around you, swallowing you whole as your eyes darted around, mind playing tricks on you that you could see silhouettes through the rows of trees.
It had gotten darker a lot faster than you had expected, your movements quiet as you tried to get comfortable in your sleeping bag, grateful that Bill and Frank had had a spare. You lay on your back between Joel and Ellie, hands resting on your stomach as you looked up at the dark sky. You saw your breath in front of you, your nose freezing to the touch. You could hear Joel and Ellie talking from either side of you, what exactly they were discussing, you couldn't exactly figure out through your absent-mindedness; that is, until one sentence from Ellie caught your attention. "Those people you said... there's no way anyone knows we're here, right?" She questioned. "No one's gonna find us." It was unclear whether the latter was a statement, a question, or an attempt to reassure herself.
"No one's gonna find us." Joel repeated, though you couldn't stop the pit from forming in your stomach.
"Okay."
The three had gone silent. Ellie turned around to get some sleep whilst you and Joel looked around cautiously. Your steps were light as you stood up, grasping onto your rifle as you stepped further into the woods to keep watch, unaware of Joel's eyes locked onto you. You knew you wouldn't have been able to sleep anyway, the gut-wrenching feeling in your stomach too overwhelming to even allow you to close your eyes, let alone fall asleep.
The cold air nipped at your skin, the overwhelming emptiness of the night making your ears ring just slightly. You jumped out of your skin when Joel appeared beside you suddenly. You looked back with wide eyes to see his sleeping bag empty before turning back to him, your eyes scanning over the gun in his hands, then his face. "Didn't even hear you." You muttered.
"Go get some sleep. I'll stay watch." He offered despite knowing the long drive he'd have to wake up to. You shook your head, muttering something about being unable to sleep; Joel looked over at you for a moment before looking back at the trees surrounding them.
They were silent for a while, standing so close their shoulders would have touched with even the smallest movement. "So you've run into people before then," Joel said lowly; he could feel you turn to look at him, your grasp on your rifle tightening before you responded.
"Something like that." You said monotone. He wasn't blind. He'd seen the way you'd reacted earlier in the day when the topic had come up. The way you tensed, your attitude switching up instantly. Despite trying his best not to imagine what you must have gone through, it was hard not to. If he had known, he would have told Ellie differently, or even better, he would have avoided the topic entirely, but how could he have?
The silence around them was almost comfortable. Almost. The two were trying their hardest not to lean closer to one another; the fact hard when they could already feel the heat radiating off the other in the cold nighttime air. "I'm sorry." You started. "About Sarah, I mean." Joel had almost forgotten the fact that you didn't know. "I tried looking. Went to your house." You started, Joel quickly understanding how you knew, what you had seen. The man thought back to that night. To his birthday. Trying desperately to get to you, all while keeping Sarah and Tommy safe. Though it didn't matter how hard he tried, considering his efforts ended in futility. "I thought you were dead." Joel turned to you, noting the way your voice cracked, your eyes softly welling with tears as you ran through it in your head. "For twenty years I thought you were dead." You looked at him.
It was almost funny. Thinking you're alone in the world, only to find yourself standing in front of the one man you'd begged to see for two decades. Their eyes were locked onto one another, Joel absentmindedly playing with the ring on his finger. "We tried getting to you, but-" Joel couldn't finish. You took a breath as you listened to his words.
"I'm so sorry." Your voice broke more than you had hoped, breaking eye contact as you looked down, trying to stop the tears from falling. "I spent twenty years believing you were dead. Believing that you died, thinking I hated you. That I..."
"That you what?" Joel said after a few beats of silence.
"That I don't love you." Your words hung in the air, your heart pounding in your chest as you waited for Joel to say something, anything; you yourself unsure of exactly what it was you wanted to hear him say. Just for a moment, you felt like throwing up, certain that the man was moments away from telling you to leave and go back to your cabin.
"I'm different." He grumbled. His voice low and uncertain. "I'm not him."
Your throat felt tight. "I know." Was all you could come up with. Then again, you were different, too. The two were quiet, their breaths echoing out into the night as you continuously clenched your hand at your side. Then, you felt the warmth.
His fingers enveloped yours, his tough, calloused palm connecting with yours. He wasn't fast; instead, his movements were slow, as though, if he moved too fast, you'd run away. He didn't speak. Didn't move his large form. Even then, you didn't expect any more. Already, you felt his words through his hand, through his touch.
"Go to sleep." He practically ordered after a gap of silence. "No one's gonna find us." His eyes dove into yours. It was different. He swore it, from the bottom of his soul. You took a moment before turning away, giving Joel's hand one squeeze before pulling away, the air feeling even colder around it than before.
__________
YOU AND JOEL PACKED THE TRUCK BACK UP AS ELLIE TOOK HER TIME WAKING UP. They didn't act differently. Not that much anyway. Not that you could see. But their looks told stories of their own. Joel's eyes found your's more often - if that were even possible. His stature was less tense, his shoulders less hunched than they had been the day before. Reluctantly, you had allowed the man to start off driving for the day. You knew how tired he must have been; you having had woken up several times throughout the night, each time finding him standing watch, making sure no one would find them, just as he said.
"Ugh! What the fuck is that?" Ellie groaned from behind the two adults, still wrapped up in her sleeping bag.
"You don't like coffee?" You chuckled at Ellie's expression, the girl looking at the bubbling kettle with a look of disgust.
Though Joel had assured you that Ellie would be fine sitting in the back, you insisted, knowing how desperate Ellie had been to explore the car some more. "Is that seriously what those Starbucks in the QZ used to sell?"
"Well, theirs was a lot fresher than what Bill saved up, but, yeah, this is what they sold," Joel said between his sips of coffee, offering some to you in the back now and again.
"Smells like burnt shit," Ellie complained.
"You smell like burnt shit." You sassed, looking at Ellie with a smug smile before turning to watch the landscape pass by out the window.
"Eyes on the map."
Ellie sighed slightly, watching Joel take another sip of the 'disgusting' coffee before turning back to the stained paper. "Seventy-six west and then... seventy west for, like, ever. Where in Wyoming did you say your brother was?"
"Last contact came through a radio tower close to Cody."
"Cody," Ellie repeated as her eyes scanned.
You leaned forward between the two, your eyes squinting as you tried to read the map for yourself. "Want me to have a look?" You offered.
"No, you'll get-"
"You'll get travel sick." Ellie cut the man off with a bad attempt at his voice. Joel turned his head towards the girl slowly, giving her a slightly unimpressed look before grunting and looking back ahead.
"I tried," You muttered before falling back into the seat.
"Cody, Cody. Ah, man. That is deep up in there." Ellie exclaimed, Joel muttering a 'yeah', stealing a few glances at the map between looking at the road, and at you through the rearview mirror.
"And if he's not there?"
"Then odds are he'll be near a settlement, probably close to another city out there. Ain't too many of 'em in Wyoming."
"Chee-Yen"
"Cheyenne."
"Che- really? Hm. Cheyenne, Laramie. Casper? What's his name?"
"Whose name?"
"Your brother." Your ears perked up, straightening your back as you listened in on the conversation. You had found yourself thinking of the man from time to time. Back then, in the moment, you'd taken him for granted. He'd cared for you, been there for you, especially in your hard times, specifically, those with Michael. When you first saw Joel alone, without his brother in tow, you'd naturally assumed the worst.
"Tommy."
"Younger or older?"
"Younger."
"Why isn't he with you?"
"A long story."
"Is it longer than twenty-five hours? 'Cause I think that's what we got." You kept silent as you listened to Joel explaining, picturing in you mind a younger Tommy in a military uniform far too big for his skinny arms, a sly smile slapped onto his face. Though as he went on, you found yourself quietly cringing as he - in your mind - dug himself into a deeper and deeper hole.
"Cut to twelve years later, outbreak happens. He convinces me to join a group makin' their way up to Boston, which I did... mostly to keep an eye on him, keep him alive. It's where we met Tess. And that whole crew, we, uh- well, for what it was, it worked. And then Tommy meets Marlene. She talks. him into joinin' the Fireflies. Same mistake he made when he was eighteen." The way the man spoke made it sound as though the Fireflies were mythical; nothing but an urban legend mothers would tell their children so that they'd sleep at night with no fuss.
"Wants to save the world. Pipe dream. Him, Fireflies, all of 'em... delusional."
"Joel." You scolded from the back. You could see the look of uncertainty on the young girl's face. Not uncertainty that she was making the wrong decision, but of what else there was to look for.
"'Course, last I heard, he quit the Fireflies, too." Joel continued anyway. "So now he's on his own out there, and... I gotta go get him."
Ellie was quiet for a while as you scratched your head from the back, sighing softly, slightly irritated at the man's inability to consider the young girl's opinions and experiences as he shared his own. "If you don't think there's hope for the world, why bother going on? I mean, you gotta try, right?"
"You haven't seen the world, so you don't know." It was difficult. To be fully on one side. You understood what the man was saying; you yourself had seen plenty, certain that anyone else would take it as a sign to give up and hope for the best as to what's on the other side. "You keep goin' for family. That's about it."
"I'm not family," Ellie noted.
"No... you're cargo. And I made a promise to Tess. And she was like family." Joel looked at you through the rearview mirror, uncertain of how to continue without dumping every thought he'd ever had about you in the past twenty years.
"What if you don't find him?"
"I will."
"How do you know?"
"I'm persistent." Ellie too went silent alongside you, the girl's tone softer than it had been when the conversation first began. "Ya got up pretty early. If you wanna grab more sleep-"
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 2.6k
Warnings: Mentions of death, violence, blood, angst, fluff if you squint, no use of Y/N.
A/N: Im pissing myself off at this point JUST LET THEM KISS
REQUESTS OPEN
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Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
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"YOU GOT ANY IDEA WHERE WE'RE SUPPOSED TO TAKE HER FROM 'ERE?" Joel questioned, his tone directed to you. You shook your head, your lips pursing for a moment.
"No. Hardly fucken' knew where we were supposed to drop her off originally." You said honestly, your eyes looking down at the dirt beneath your shoes as though it were the most interesting thing in the world. And then, that was it. Practically the only words the two had spoken to one another since Tess, well...outside of that, other than Joel and Ellie's soft chatter, the hike had been rather quiet. In your mind, however, it was the complete opposite.
Your mind couldn't stop racing with thoughts of how to talk to Joel - in a way that wasn't an awkward ten-second interaction with no real emotion behind it. How to catch up on twenty years missed. Whether he even wanted to go back to what they were - whatever that was. As dark as it may be, you couldn't help but feel that with the absence of Tess, the confrontation only neared closer. It didn't matter how dull Joel was to Ellie, how cold his eyes were at times; all you could see was the man you knew, and that fact scared you.
Against Joel's wishes, Ellie continued down the road leading directly to Bill and Frank's despite the man claiming he didn't want her to see whatever was down there. You would have agreed with the man if you had known what exactly it was he was trying to shield the girl from; God, you would have gone off the road alone if you'd known. Your heart pounded in your chest as you stared down at the remains, skulls and ribcages decorating the patch of dirt, your hands shaking at your sides before you balled them into fists.
"About a week after Outbreak Day, soldiers... went through the countryside, evacuated the small towns. Told you you were goin' to a QZ, and you were... if there was room. If there wasn't..."
"These people weren't sick?" Ellie questioned solemnly as she looked down at the skulls, some larger, some smaller; some still covered in fabric, and others with bags surrounding them showing the story of their lives that had ended too soon. That ended unfairly. Unjust.
"No, probably not." Your ears rang, covering up any words coming from Joel and Ellie's mouths; all you knew was you had to step away before you threw up. Joel and Ellie watched on in confusion as you stormed away, your steps certain and heavy, but they could see the way your hands shook despite being balled up so tightly your knuckles turned white. "What's her problem?" Ellie murmured as she and Joel slowly followed along close behind.
"I dunno." Was all the man could muster up, his eyes trained on the woman ahead. You could feel the silence as it ate away at you. Despite knowing you wouldn't have been paying attention anyway even if the two had spoken amongst themselves, the unsettling silence made you almost sick.
"My Dad," You began, slowing down so that the other two could catch up before matching their pace. "When everything first happened, we went down to his place; figured we'd be safer there. Quieter town, fewer people, less risk." Joel felt sick. "Eventually, soldiers came to take us away. We were supposed to be on the same truck, but there wasn't enough room. I told him I'd take the later one. That he should go first, but..." Despite not being all that close with your father, Joel knew him well enough to understand. The man would have done anything for his daughter. He always had a way of seeing things; of understanding things before they even happened. Joel knew that he'd probably guessed he wasn't gonna make it, but he also knew that the man likely didn't care as long as his girl was safe.
You cleared your throat softly as you tried to hide the break in your voice. "A few hours went by, and they still weren't at the QZ. I kept asking, and they just said that they'd get there eventually. It took me about a week to get out of there; retraced my steps back the way we came and-" You took a beat before finishing. "Found him like those people back there. The government wasn't trying to protect the people; they were just covering their own asses."
Joel's brows furrowed as he listened. He knew twenty years was a long time but, in a way, it only just hit him how long it really was. How many other losses had he missed? How many fights had he not been there to help you? Somehow, in some way, seeing you only made Joel miss you more.
__________
"STAY THERE," Joel said as he opened the gate. From what you'd heard about Bill and Frank - which, albeit, wasn't all that much - you were expecting... more. More security, more protection. If anything, it looked like the fence could have been broken through pretty easily with all the rust eating through it, that is, if it weren't for the 'high voltage' sign adorning it.
You could see that something was wrong. The way Joel moved, the way he looked around, something wasn't right. It looked as though he was grieving something long lost. "What the fuck?" Ellie breathed out as they stepped inside.
"Bill?" Joel called out, gun drawn but pointed to the floor. "Frank? Stay there." He ordered as he turned to look at the two, his eyes landing on Ellie as he continued. "Ya hear anything, you see anything... yell."
"What if they're gone?" Ellie spoke softly, innocently, almost. You clicked your tongue, your eyes harsh and almost scolding. Whether or not you agreed or disagreed, you'd never say it aloud. Joel ignored the question, instead leaving in silence to look for the two who had yet to reveal themselves.
"Ellie," You muttered softly after some moments, the girl having seemingly teleported into the other room within the few seconds you were looking away. The house had almost seemed abandoned, rotted food looking out of place upon the fancy plates and silverware, the wine glasses still stained red. You kept a vague eye on Ellie as she explored the room, fingers dancing on the piano keys.
Despite having never met the owners of the home, you were able to paint a vague picture of what they'd looked like thanks to the artworks hanging on the walls; you assumed they'd been done by one of the two men. After having almost forgotten about Ellie, you were almost startled by the young girl sitting on one of the dining chairs ahead of you, way at the other end of the table. Your brows furrowed as you watched Ellie, your mind racing, trying to figure out what she was reading. "Ellie?" You heard Joel's voice ring out before you got the chance to speak, the man stalking out from around the corner to face the same sight as you - Ellie slouched against the chair, gritty paper in hand.
"It's from Bill." She said softly. You turned to look at Joel, attempting to gauge his reaction, though you gained little to no intel. Joel put his gun back into the waistband of his jeans, already knowing in the back of his mind what the letter meant, part of him not wanting to believe it. "'To whomever... but probably Joel.' I figured I fell under 'whomever'. Came with this." Ellie said as she slid the key across the table towards the man.
The backpack slid off his shoulders as he moved forward, his eyes cold and sombre; though not all that different from what they normally looked like, there was still something that had changed. He scanned the key in his palm, his tone dull. "So they're dead?"
"Mm-hmm. You, you wanna?"
"Go ahead. You do it."
"'August 29, 2023. If you find this... please do not come into the bedroom. We left a window open so the house wouldn't smell, but it will probably be a sight. I'm guessing you found this, Joel, because anyone else would've been electrocuted or blown up by one of my traps. Hehehehehehehehe. Take anything you need. The bunker code is the same as the gate code but in reverse. Anyway... I never liked you, but still, it's like we're friends... almost. And I respect you. So, I'm gonna tell you something because you're probably the only person who will understand. I used to hate the world and I was happy when everyone died. But I was wrong because there was one person worth saving. That's what I did. I saved him. Then I protected him. That's why men like you and me are here. We have a job to do. And God help any motherfuckers who stand in our way. I leave you all of my weapons and equipment. Use them to keep-'" Ellie cut herself off, her eyes zoned in on one spot on the page. You could only assume what it said, your heart racing in your chest as you comprehended everything in the letter.
"Stay here," Joel said, his voice almost breaking as he stormed outside. You and Ellie were silent, Ellie staring at the floor as you sucked your bottom lip between your teeth.
"Should I not have read it?" Ellie questioned softly, her tone gentle as though she were in trouble.
"No, no. He just- ...you're fine." You replied, unsure of what exactly to say. What was there to say? Your mind thought back to the letter, the words inside telling you how much Joel had changed since you'd last known him. Sure, back then he wasn't the most sociable guy, but 'used to hate the world' and 'happy when everyone died'? All you could ponder was that, if Bill were right in Joel understanding how he felt, then the man had changed much more than you thought he had.
The two waited in silence for Joel, you leaning against the table, hands grasping the wood tightly. You were zoned out, unsure of how long you'd been doing so until Joel walked back in, eyes staring at Ellie. "Show me your arm." He ordered. The girl stood up to show him the scar trailing up her forearm, along with the fresher bite. "I just finished makin' a truck battery. It's charging right now."
"Okay." Ellie nodded slowly as you watched on silently.
"And I have a brother out in Wyoming. He's in some kinda trouble, and I'm heading out there to find him. He used to be a Firefly. And my guess is he knows where some of them are out there. Maybe they can get you to wherever this lab is." Joel briefly explained, his eyes jumping over to you every now and again.
"All right. Uh, listen, about Tess, uh-" Joel put his hand up, silencing the girl almost instantly.
"If I'm takin' you with me, there's some rules you gotta follow. Rule one, you don't bring up Tess. Ever. Matter of fact, we can just keep our histories to ourselves. Rule two, you don't tell anyone about your... condition. They see that bite mark, they won't think it through. They'll just shoot you. Rule three, you do what I say when I say it. We clear?"
"Yes."
"Repeat it."
"What you say goes." Joel went quiet, looking down at the girl as if he was still weighing out the options in his head.
"Okay." He sighed.
"So, what now?"
"We grab what we can."
__________
YOUR EYES WANDERED AROUND THE GARAGE AS YOU STEPPED INSIDE. It wasn't like you hadn't been in a garage for twenty years, but it'd been a long time since you'd seen one so stocked up. Your head snapped to Ellie at the sound of her excited tone. "They have hot water!" She sang out. "I'm takin' a shower. And then you're showering, because seriously. Pfff..." She said to Joel as she walked out.
The room was silent once Ellie had left, both you and Joel unsure of exactly what to say or where to begin. "So... Tommy's alive?" You questioned, Joel grunting out a quiet 'yes'. You weren't sure of what to think. Just a couple days ago, you'd believed everyone in your old life was dead, now all of a sudden they were popping up like flies on rotting meat. "Well shit..." You puffed out under your breath.
"You don't have to come." Joel started after a few beats. "I mean, I don't expect you to." He murmured. Despite what he said, he couldn't help but hope you'd stay. Not that he'd ever really admit it.
"I'm coming with you," You replied almost too quickly. The two adults stared at one another, their eyes locked together for longer than they'd been since they first reunited. Joel nodded, part of him relieved at your decision.
"You should, uh, shower once Ellie's done. Use the hot water while we can." He murmured as he looked back down at the truck bed.
"What, 'cause I stink?" You sassed, Joel's head snapping up at you for a moment, mouth open, catching flies. "I'm just kidding." You chuckled softly before walking away. "I'll, uh, call you when I'm done." You muttered as you walked out.
Joel was silent, eyes still staring at the doorway you had left through as though you'd reappear any moment. It almost scared him how easily they began to fall back into routine. Twenty years apart, and their habits still went on unchanged.
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YOU COULDN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME YOU'D BATHED IN HOT WATER THAT WASN'T JUST WARMED UP BY THE SUN. You felt every knot in your back loosen, the dirt and grime caked onto your skin lifting off in a way you hadn't managed to do in a long while. The handle squeaked as you shut the water off, wrapping a towel around your torso as your hair fell wet against your neck.
The tiles were cool beneath your feet as you slowly creaked the door open, your body jumping out of your skin as another appeared in front of you. "Shit." You breathed out, one hand coming up to rest on your heart as the other held the towel securely.
"Sorry," Joel muttered. "Wasn't sure if you had a towel." He said as his brain tried to figure out where to look. Realistically, he knew damn well you had a towel, even if you couldn't find one by yourself, Ellie would have shown you. He was just finding reasons to talk to you. One short conversation, just the two of them, and he was already addicted. You muttered a quick thanks before they fell into a silence, one much less awkward than the ones they'd found themselves in previously.
It didn't matter how much time had passed. Not really. Because when Joel looked at you, all he could see was the woman you were. The woman he once yearned for. The one he'd die for. Your chest heaved as you stared up at the man, the predicament reminding you a little too closely of the night of Joel's last birthday before the world went to shit. The two hadn't even noticed their bodies floating towards one another, the heat emitting off your body radiating onto Joel's as he contemplated his next actions, though he'd thought the warmth was all in his head.
Joel froze, his body tensing as he grunted slightly and pushed past you into the bathroom. You hadn't even had time to utter a word when the door slammed shut behind you, the sound of the shower starting up sounding out almost instantly. Could you really blame him for running away? No. Not really. With everything that had happened within the last forty-eight hours, if anything, you'd expected it. But that didn't stop you from feeling a slight sense of disappointment in your gut. Disappointed that you didn't grasp onto the chance you'd lost once before, twenty years ago. Old habits really do die hard.
im planning on uploading my 'The Last of Us' fic onto ao3 (and any other fic/imagine i do for other series') but idk if i should keep it an OC fic or change it to a /reader. 😭
i can change the names easily enough but i feel like there are so many smaller details that i need to use the OC's name for and idk if i should work around it, remove it completely, or keep it an OC..
Summary: You were there with him on that day as he faced Abby. In another universe maybe that would have helped, maybe you could have saved him. But life doesn't always work that way.
Warnings: Major character death, blood, violence, heavy angst, 2x02 spoilers, no use of y/n.
A/N: Angsty imagines take my heart
REQUESTS OPEN
YOU COULD HEAR THE WIND HOWLING ANGRILY, WHISTLING AS IT WEAVED THROUGH THE TREES UP IN THE MOUNTAIN. The cold nipped at you ferociously even from inside, your nose cold to the touch, lips chapped and dull. Despite where you lay on the floor you could still see Jackson; see the fire as it roared, smoke enveloping the town you had been sleeping safely in only hours ago. But yet in that moment, none of that mattered, all that mattered was the gun set on your husband. You couldn't care less for the one trained on you, digging into the side of your head, your eyes instead jumping from Joel who stood with his arms up in surrender and Dina lying unconscious on the floor next to you.
"I'm gonna give you one chance to tell the truth, Joel. If you do... let's face it. We'll all know. I'll let 'em live." Your body shook from the cold, your head turning as far as it could to look at Abby. You'd just saved her; Joel risked his life to help her and this is what you get in return. You'd felt uneasy about her from the get-go, the looks she kept giving your husband irking something inside you. And God you should have fucking listened.
"Wait, Abby, I thought-"
"Shut up!' You tried to think, tried to come up with a plan. But you couldn't. You were outnumbered; even more so with Dina drugged unconscious. You knew that if you really wanted to you could get out of the man's hold, Owen if you remembered correctly. His knee pressed harshly onto the centre of your back, his free hand pulling your left arm back until it stung leaving your right on the floor next to you trying desperately to ground yourself. Despite his tall stature, if you waited for an opportunity you knew you could break free. But then what? Get shot down leaving your husband to deal alone? Some part of you didn't want to believe it, but deep down you knew you were fucked. "Where was the last place you saw the Fireflies?"
At that, your blood ran cold, and you knew Joel's did too from the way his eyes jumped to yours. You kept silent. "Salt Lake," Joel said shakily.
"At least you're honest." She said as she turned her back to him.
He looked back at Jackson for a moment, at his home. "I saved your life."
"What life." Your ears rang as the shotgun sounded, a scream escaping your lips as you watched your husband's knee get blasted in. His scream echoed in your brain, your eyes wide with tears as you watched him grunt and wheeze in pain. "Tourniquet him."
"Mel, let's just do what we came to do," Owen said from above you, his knee pressing you further into the cold floor.
"Please, please, stop. Please, don't." You cried impulsively through trembling lips as your husband screamed once again. A sob escaped your lips as Abby ignored you, moving to kneel in front of Joel.
"You're tough. I guess you probably have to be, killing all those people. Do you know how many you killed that day? How many your - what, your wife? -, how many she killed that day?" She questioned, turning to face your scared face for a moment before turning back to Joel. "Did you count as you went, or... I guess maybe it just didn't matter? Eighteen soldiers. And one doctor. You remember that one. An unarmed doctor you shot in the head. Yeah. That was my Dad. Guess you probably already figured. The nurses said you barely even looked at him when you pulled the trigger. And then, you two just walked right past his body and out the door. But I looked at him. I saw him. I was nineteen."
You saw Joel's lips flutter, trying to think of what to say that could make it all better. But you both knew there was nothing. "I-I killed him. I killed your Dad." You lied through your teeth, willing to do anything. Abby's jaw clenched before she stood up to face you, taking a few steps closer. Your eyes glared into hers, your breaths shaky.
"You know, they told me about you too. How you shot my Dad in the leg right before he killed him." She said gesturing behind her to your husband. The two of you stared at each other for a moment, Abby towering over you, looking down as though you were nothing but dog shit on the bottom of her shoe. Then, a crunch sounded out, a scream of pain scratching your throat as it left your mouth; Abby's snowboot slowly lifted from your right hand. You saw Joel's mouth moving but you couldn't focus on what he was saying, your eyes too focused on the mutilation of your hand. She'd put her full weight into it when she trampled. Your hand was red and purple with spots of blood, at least two of your fingers broken and your thumb seemingly dislocated.
Shaky breaths escaped your lips as you tried to calm yourself, the pain overwhelming as Abby turned back to Joel. "I've been in a militia for five years now. Seattle. I'd warn you not to go there, but little chance of that. Anyway, our commander trained us to follow a code. We don't kill people that can't defend themselves. And right now... that's you. But I am going to kill you. Because it doesn't matter if you have a code like me, or you're a lawless piece of shit like you. There are just some things... everyone agrees are just fucking wrong." Tears fell from her cheeks, Joel watching her cautiously, his eyes jumping to you every few seconds. Abby slowly stood up before walking away. "You know, it's funny. I have waited so long-"
"Oh, just shut the fuck up and do it already."
"No, listen, we can figure something out. Okay? Please- just, just let me think." You heard Abby mutter something from where she stood, the man above you tensing for a moment. Then, pain scorched through your body yet again. He pulled your left arm further back, grunts of pain escaping you as you tried to lean back with him in attempts to ease the ache. Your legs kicked desperately, your shoes squeaking against the glossy floor.
You were sure your arm was moments away from popping out of its socket, tears welling in your eyes as you watched Joel, your husband looking back at you. You could see it in his eyes, the way he tried to comfort you, silently trying to reassure you that it would all be okay. But you knew it wouldn't. When his eyes traveled back to Abby they darkened, his brows furrowed with anger instead of concern.
"You... stupid... old man." You panted through clenched teeth as you watched Abby near closer to Joel, the golf club secure in her grasp as her knuckles turned white. "You don't get to rush this."
It was like a car wreck, you just couldn't look away; screams and cries escaped your lips and tears fell from your cheeks soaking the floor as you watched her torture your husband. You jumped at every hit of the golf club, your sobs, screams, and pleas eventually falling upon deaf ears.
You watched your husband get beat to death, tortured, hit so hard with the damn golf club it snapped in two leaving Abby to repeatedly punch his head into the wooden floor. With your ear pressed against the floor, the sounds were only amplified, each hit rattling your bones until Joel was left silent, his face caked in blood as he quietly watched you scream and cry for her to kill you instead.
"Abby. Abby." You heard the man above you call out, the girl only ignoring him as she continued to punch. Your face was covered in tears, your head pounding from the tension and stress. Owen had moved the gun from your temple a while ago as he watched Abby, though you were too preoccupied to notice. You felt as though your teeth were shaking, each breath only rattling them more as you began hyperventilating. "That's enough!"
A gunshot sounded out, your cries falling quiet, only soft sniffles and light sobs escaping your lips, your breathing still heavy. It took you a moment to realise what was happening, who had just arrived. "Ellie, no please." You sobbed quietly; though, everyone was too preoccupied with unarming her to listen.
You felt the man on top of you move - likely to subdue Ellie you'd assumed -, your left arm falling harshly onto the floor. Despite the pain that continued to shoot through it along with the throbbing of your broken and mutilated right hand you tried to get up. You heard yelling, some from Ellie and others swears from Abby's people, though it was difficult to decipher with the loud ringing in your ears. Grunts escaped your lips, your body shaking as you tried to get up, that is until you were kicked down again, your jaw aching as it hit the floor harshly.
You sobbed, your eyes just managing to spot Manny on top of you, a bloody cut adorning his forehead. He was rougher than Owen, his boot pushing onto your back rougher as he tugged your arm back further. "Joel!" You heard Ellie yell, your eyes watching your husband as he lifted his fingers whilst Ellie begged for him to get up. "Joel, get up! Joel fucking get up!"
Your throat was raw, whimpers escaping your lips despite your attempts to calm them. "Please- please don't hurt them. Please, I'm sorry. Please." You were almost incoherent.
"End it."
You screamed out, your chest heaving, the pain that echoed throughout your body falling to the back of your mind. You were running out of time. "P-Please. If, if you're trying to get him back for- for your Dad then kill me. Make him, make him feel how you felt. Kill me." You stuttered out through trembling lips. As you sobbed, you saw Abby's head turn to you slightly, your heart lifting for just a moment, and then, she walked to your husband.
It was as though everything went silent, Ellie's cries and pleas along with your own, all you could see was the broken golf club stabbing through Joel's neck. You saw his body flinch as it pierced his skin, his eyes dulling as the life drained from them. Despite the tears covering most of your vision, you could still see it sticking out of his neck. All you wanted to do was comfort him, hold him, clean the blood from his face; but all he got was the cold floor as he met his demise.
Things almost felt like they were moving in slow motion as Abby turned to you, Manny still putting all the weight he could into your back. He continued to pull your left arm back until it finally happened, though, not in the way you had expected. You screamed when Abby kicked, her foot hitting your left arm so hard the bone snapped; Manny let it go as it fell to the floor.
You could hear Ellie's screams. As much as you wanted Abby to end it, all you could think about was how she'd be left alone; again. You felt Abby's boot as she pushed at your torso, flipping you onto your back. Your teeth chattered as you faced death, your body aching. You felt as Abby hit you, again, and again, her fists hitting your face punch after punch.
Part of you thought about how her fists had been covered in Joel's blood, the idea that, in a way, you were able to feel him one last time almost comforting you. "Please stop!" You heard Ellie scream out, your heart aching. Your face felt sticky from the blood, your nose sore and likely broken.
You watched as Abby pulled out her handgun. Before you even had a chance to prepare yourself you heard the bang, heat emitting from your abdomen. You were almost so numb you didn't feel it. Almost. You felt the warmth of blood as it slipped past your lips, your coughs wet and sticky as you groaned and cried in pain. Abby's aim lifted until it was aimed directly between your eyes.
You remembered hearing that the human brain lived on for seven minutes after death replaying its best memories. At that moment, you could only hope it was true. Maybe then you could see Joel again, see his smile, feel his warmth envelop you, wake up beside him again, feel Ellie's arms wrap around you on horseback, have dinner with your family one last time.
Your world went silent. No pain, no emotions, just darkness, silence. But not Ellie's. No. She watched as Abby pulled the trigger, the bullet piercing your forehead and killing you instantly. She felt the pain, she felt the grief, she saw the light shining in from the windows casting shadows past you and Joel's bodies, but she also heard the silence. She heard the lack of cries escaping your lips, the lack of pleas. Before she had wanted you to be silent, for there to be no reason for your cries. But now, all she wanted was to hear your pain again. Because at least that meant you were alive.
Pairing: Joel Miller x Tommy Miller x Sister!Reader, Ellie x AuntFigure!Reader
WC: 2.2k
Summary: Of all days to be out of town it had to be then. For twenty years you thought your big-brothers were dead just as they thought you were. You sat in the cage, cold, scared, alone, certain that with each breath you were one step closer to death itself. What you hadn't expected was for a young girl to be thrown in with you; and who would have thought that she'd be the one to bring you home.
Warnings: David, blood, violence, death, sexual assault, mentions of Sarah, angst, fluff, use of y/n, reader is insinuated to be shorter than Joel and Tommy and to have "deep" eyes, reader is described to have a slight Texan accent, reader is somewhat close in age to Tommy and Joel (early to mid-40s), nickname refers to reader being younger.
A/N: PLEASE give me some miller-sister fics im starving omg
REQUESTS OPEN
YOU PUSHED ELLIE FURTHER BEHIND YOU AS DAVID AND JAMES STORMED INSIDE, TRYING YOUR BEST TO HIDE HER AS YOU BACK FURTHER INTO THE CORNER. Ellie screamed from behind you as the gate swung open. "Get the fuck away from her." You yelled out, your fists clenched as you swung at James. From the moment Ellie had been thrown in the cage with you, from the moment she reluctantly told you her name, you knew you were going to help her. She wouldn't be another one of David's victims. She couldn't be. She was just a kid.
There was something about you that had lured Ellie in, the depth of your eyes and the soft accent bringing her a sense of warmth and familiarity that she couldn't quite pinpoint. Your protective nature helped, your tone as you spoke of how you swore you'd get her out safely made her want to believe you.
You'd tried your best to fight, truly, but the exhaustion mixed with dehydration and the cold made it difficult. Your head ricocheted off the tiles as he threw you down, a low groan escaping your lips as your head pounded.
You watched with tears as they dragged Ellie out of the cage, the girl kicking as she tried to get away, her teeth sinking into David's hand before he kneed her in the stomach. You grabbed David's leg and tried to pull him away, your teeth clenched so tight they could have fallen out. "Bitch!" He yelled as he kicked you across the face, your body falling back as pain radiated through your face; you knew you were bleeding, warmth covering your jaw along with a big bruise beginning to form, your lip busted and swollen already.
David slammed the gate shut behind him and locked it leaving you to watch on as they threw Ellie onto the table. "Get off her! Stop!" You pleaded through tears as you tried to reach through the bars.
"I'm infected!" Your voice fell silent. What the fuck. "I'm infected." She repeated. You watched with furrowed brows, silently begging for David to drop the cleaver. It didn't matter to you. It didn't matter that you'd been stuck in the cage with an infected girl; all that mattered was her not dying at the hands of David. "And now so are you. Roll up my sleeve. Look at it. Look at it!"
A whimper escaped your lips as David slammed the cleaver into the table right by Ellie's head, your eyes falling shut in relief before opening yet again, watching on intently. Despite not being able to see, you knew it was true. The look on David and James' faces told all. "What did you say? Everything happens for a reason, right?"
"David," James whispered.
"No. No, she would've turned by now. This isn't real."
"It looks pretty fuckin' real to me." Then, blood; it was all you saw, the blood spurting out of James' neck after Ellie had slammed the meat cleaver into him before jumping off the table and running. Good. You began desperately pulling at the cage wiring, the metal ripping at your palms and the insides of your fingers. You watched anxiously as David aimed his handgun and shot at her before tossing it aside and grabbing the clever from James' neck.
Then, you were left in silence. Sickening silence. All you heard the faint grunts and yells from the dining room. Your arms ached as you tugged at the wire, blood beginning to seep from between your fingers as you desperately tried to escape. Not for your own sake but for Ellie's. It felt as though forever had passed, for who knows maybe forever did pass and now Ellie was dead, but nonetheless, you had to get out, you had to be sure.
You fell back as the wiring was ripped from the poles, swiftly scrambling up to crawl through, careless of the open metal scratching at your skin, or the warmth of your hands as blood covered them. You coughed at the smoke, the black substance enveloping your lungs from the inside. You had to get to Ellie.
Your stomach fell once you walked through those kitchen doors, the sight of David on top of Ellie, his sick eyes boring into hers and the grin on his face made you want to throw up. But you couldn't. Not yet. Your head spun as you ran, ramming into his side and knocking him off of her. Your hands wrapped around his neck, nails digging into the skin as you grunted. You felt him grabbing at you, felt him try to rip you off of him, but it didn't matter, at least not until he succeeded that is.
Pain shot through your back as it hit the ground, David swiftly getting up and kneeling over you. You felt his fists pummel into your face, the pain overwhelming as your face swung side to side with each hit. And yet, you didn't care. All you could do was silently plead that Ellie got his keys and ran, then, you saw her swing the bloodied cleaver at David's head.
You watched on as she struck him. Again and again, over and over, blood splashing onto her face and clothes. You didn't stop her, instead you watched. A glint in your eyes that hadn't been there for a long time. David got what was coming to him. Finally. You felt numb.
Eventually, you told Ellie to go ahead, promising that you'd follow after her in a minute. You coughed through the smoke as you stumbled into the back room, picking up David's disposed gun from the ground.
The gun shook within your hold as you checked for bullets, shit, empty. It didn't matter. You could still use it, you tried to convince yourself. Your eyes burned, the atmosphere thick, making it difficult to get a full breath of air. Despite that, despite the pain that came with breathing, you stopped. David's body lay motionless on the floor, blood still pouring from his almost unrecognisable face.
You kicked him. Then again, and again, and again, and again. Over and over. Screams escaped your cracked lips. Finally, he was fucking dead. Your body ached as you limped outside, the pain finally getting to you. The snow froze at your feet, hisses escaping your lips as you stepped out into the cold with nothing but socks. The torn sweater you wore did little to keep the cold out, the once-warm blood soaking your body turning cold in an instant.
Your lips felt freezing, your nose flushed and cold. Your body shivered, your arms closed around your torso trying to preserve any warmth left. Then you saw them, Ellie and a man you didn't know, your brain unable to register the fact that Ellie wasn't fighting. You raised the gun against the back of his head, you'd just have to make do. "Get away from her." You said weakly, your voice shaky from the cold and likely imminent hypothermia. "Turn around."
Despite the weakness of your voice, you were stern, your eyes glaring into the back of the man's head as he slowly turned around with his arms up. "Y/N, no-" Ellie spoke up as she stepped towards you, her eyes red and rimmed with tears.
"Joel?" Your ears rang, your heart beating wildly in your chest. Maybe you were dying, hallucinating. Yeah, that must've been it. But then you felt it. His hand. First, it was just on your jaw as he gently cradled your face in his hands. Then it was all over. His arms wrapped around your shoulders, one hand coming up to hold the back of your head.
"Smalls?"
You felt like a little girl again, the moment reminding you of when you'd fallen and scraped your knee only for your big brother to come and tend to you. Tears cascaded down your cheeks like tidal waves. Your body shook, this time from your cries rather than the cold. Ellie watched on confused, her brows furrowed, blood still sprayed across her face.
"This isn't real." You said through sobs as you shook your head, hands sitting idly at your sides. "You're dead." You cried; Joel pulled back, his hands moving to cradle your face once again careful of the injuries adorning it. For twenty years you were certain he was dead just as he had thought you were dead.
His mouth moved but nothing came out, unsure of what he could say to make things better. If there was even anything to say to make things better. "I'm right here." Your chest hurt as you sobbed, your fingers clawing at his shirt; for the first time in a long time, you felt safe. The pain in your body had dissipated, your mind uncaring of the blood still dripping from your palms. You had your brother back.
The chill of your body irked him, you were freezing. The bag dropped from his shoulders as he ripped out whatever clothes he could to cover you up, his jacket already layered over Ellie. Along with, he pulled out some boots; they weren't your size by any means but they were better than the ripped socks you'd started with.
He didn't care. Joel that is; he didn't care about the pain in his abdomen or the cold that nipped at his face, all that mattered was that he had his girl's back.
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THE TRAVEL HAD BEEN EXHAUSTING TO SAY THE LEAST. With your body already weak it was difficult, especially in the beginning; you had to stop more frequently to rest, though, whatever rest you did get wasn't the most fulfilling. Your dreams were plagued with David, with the memories of what he'd done to you, what he'd done to Ellie. Joel eventually told you about Sarah, the news - despite being twenty years old - hurt, guilt filling you all over again for not being there.
It didn't take Ellie long to grow on you and vice versa. She'd learnt quickly who you were, though it didn't exactly surprise her. Your protective nature and attitude reminded her of Joel, with the similar attitudes - your mannerisms reminding her of Tommy from what she'd seen of him -, though you were a lot more open with her off the bat than Joel was. And so, when Joel decided to save Ellie, to kill the Fireflies and keep the fact from her, you followed. She was his family - even if he didn't say it himself - and so she was yours.
Your body groaned in pain as you neared Jackson. Ellie and Joel had told you enough to know that it was safe, that they'd have a place for you there. But you couldn't help the suspicion you held, the belief that they were hiding something.
The gate creaked open, your eyes darting around suspiciously. You still found it hard to trust. Part of you unwilling to believe that you were truly safe, that you ever would be. But then, you heard his name. "Tommy!" As the words fell from Joel's mouth, you froze, your eyes still locked onto the ground, your hand grasping the handle of your backpack tighter.
It must have been a different Tommy, it had to be. You were already lucky enough with Joel, it couldn't be. "Smalls?" The nickname hit you hard - Joel slipping a slight smile at the sound reminding his own reaction - as you looked up and locked eyes with him. Holy shit.
Your legs pumped, your feet hitting the ground harshly as you ran to him, tears already cascading. A soft grunt escaped your lips as you collided with him, arms wrapping tightly around his torso, his around yours as simultaneously cradled the back of your neck. "Holy fuck." He muttered into your hair, repeating it once, two more times, his body shaking as he cried silently, still looking at Joel in shock. He didn't let go of you for a while as neither did you, honestly, you weren't sure you could. He smelled the same. Yes, a little smellier - though that came with living in an apocalypse -, but just like Joel, he smelt the same as before. He smelt like home.
You remembered driving back into town a few days after it happened, bodies still filling the streets as you pleaded for your family to be safe. When you showed up to an empty house, you sobbed; for hours you couldn't stop crying, you wouldn't. You were the last, you were all that was left. Alone and scared. But now, somehow, you had found them. Despite the fucked up world, despite the pain you had suffered, you found your big brothers, a family. A broken one, maybe, but a family nonetheless.
As you felt Joel's hand on your back, Tommy's arms still encircling you, you knew that none of it mattered anymore. The years spent alone, memories of David, the scars that adorned the inside of your fingers and face from saving Ellie, it didn't matter anymore. Now, you had something to fight for, people to fight for. Now, you had people to fight for you, to protect you, to calm you after another panic attack, to remind you that you're free. You had a family.
Pairing: Joel Miller x F!Reader
WC: 2k
Warnings: Major character death, blood, violence, angst, no use of Y/N.
A/N: A bit of a filler chapter but the next one will really start getting into it
REQUESTS OPEN
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THE OLD STATE HOUSE WAS QUIET; CONCERNINGLY SO. "Where the fuck are they?" Tess whispered as the four hid behind an old, well-overgrown car. You felt uneasy, your heart heavy in your chest; something was wrong, they could all feel it. Joel stood up and took slow steps towards the old government building, the grass too loud for his liking as he stepped through.
He kept his gun drawn, his head scanning around cautiously as he stepped towards a truck and pulled the passenger door open only to find it empty; old blood sprayed throughout the interior. There should have been soldiers. There was supposed to be. Dozens, patrolling every nook and cranny of the damn building. Why the fuck was it so damn quiet?
You watched as he wandered further, mouthing back to the three behind the car to stay where they were. You almost felt restless letting him leave your line of sight; sure, he had when they were dealing with the clickers in the museum and when you and Tess had gone crawling through rubble, but that was different. You couldn't help but feel as though you were letting him go, that fact sitting uncomfortably in your stomach, seeing as how long it took for you to find him again the last time you'd done it.
Joel looked over the bodies scattered along the concrete, flies buzzing about as they fed on the corpses, reproducing and thriving. The more they thought about it, the more they realised how much the area smelt of death; that deep scent that was difficult to forget, sticking to your clothes and hair no matter how hard you scrub. "Joel? What the fuck is going on?" Tess snapped as the three rounded the corner of the truck towards the man.
"I don't know."
"Did you know about this?" Tess questioned, her head whipping to you.
Despite the harshness in her tone, you spoke calmly, you knew. The desperation behind her eyes was clear. You understood. "No; I didn't even know Marlene wanted her here until you guys picked me up."
"They went inside," Ellie said, her voice rather monotone. The adults looked over to where Ellie had been looking, deep red blood droplets staining the stairs and leading up into the building. Tess looked on with a silent plea, grabbing Ellie's hand to lead her inside.
"Come on." She said through gritted teeth, her busted ankle aching with each step.
"Tess."
"Come on!"
"Tess!" The woman continued on uncaringly, you and Joel rushing after the two - not before sharing a look of concern, brows furrowing as they readied their guns. Tess' pistol was drawn as she stepped in, her strides long, only slowing once she'd reached the nightmare that was the massacre of Fireflies. It was clear something big had happened. The bodies were scattered, some more bloodied than others, some so mutilated it was hard to look at.
"Holy shit," Ellie muttered.
"Fuck," You whispered beneath your breath, your rifle dropping slightly. Tess continued to look around desperately, looking for someone, anything.
"I mean, there's gotta be a, a fuckin' radio or somethin', right?" She said hopefully, though it was more intended for herself than for the others.
She looked through the boxes throughout the room, her steps echoing whilst you, Joel, and Ellie studied the bodies. "Who killed them? FEDRA?"
"No. One of them got bit." He used his boot to flip one of the bodies; the very-much-dead man flopping to the side, the side of his face pale with red streaks highlighting the yellowish veins. His brain painted the floor, the deep red hue so dark it almost looked like a void. "The healthy ones fought the sick ones. Everyone lost. Tess? What're you doin'?" He questioned, though his tone wasn't that of concern but rather exhaustion, annoyance almost.
You decided to help Tess look, though, if you were honest, you were unsure what you were even looking for; nonetheless, you searched, poking around in different boxes to see if there was anything to lead them in the right direction. Even if they managed to find a map, God fucking knows if they'd even be able to get her there anyway. "Where did Marlene say that she was taking you?" Tess called out to Ellie, her movements were fast and erratic, eager, even. "Ellie!"
"Uh, I don't know. Just west."
"Just west." She repeated in a low mutter. "Fuck. Okay. Well, I mean one of them's gotta have a map on them, right? Can one of you fuckin' help me?" She practically pleaded as she tried opening up a large box; you moved to help before Joel grabbed your arm, stopping you.
"No! Tess... it's over. We are going home." His voice was low and demanding as he walked over to the woman.
"That's not my fucking home!" She snapped, the room falling silent as the three watched the woman, Joel and Ellie with confusion and you more so with a sense of empathy. Tess scoffed, turning for a moment to calm herself before she stood in front of Joel. "I'm stayin'. I mean... our luck had to run out sooner or later."
Joel was confused, his brows furrowed as he tried to piece together what she was saying. "Fuck." Ellie whispered to herself, Joel turning to look. "She's infected." You watched as Joel and Tess stared at one another, your heart aching for both of them. Even if he didn't say it, even if he didn't fully show it on his face, he was devastated.
"Show me." He said lowly.
"Joel." Tess' stomach dropped when she tried to take a step forward, only for Joel to quickly move back as his eyes hardened, his hand landing on the handle of his handgun. Whether he meant for his movement to come across as rushed or not, it didn't matter as Tess looked on in pain.
She pulled back the collar of her shirt to reveal the mangled bite mark, the veins around it already protruding. You tried to swallow away the ball in your throat; even if you had only known Tess for a short amount of time, you could see she was a good one, that she was caring. Even if she appeared tough, it was only so that she could keep the people around her safe. "Oops, right? Take your bandage off." She told Ellie, the girl sighing as she did so, pulling up her sleeve. "Look." She almost whispered as she walked over. "Joel? This is real." She said desperately, showing him Ellie's bite. "Joel, she's fucking real."
Her hand trembled harshly before she quickly hid it behind her back. "I need you to get her to Bill and Frank's," Joel muttered a no, his hand resting on the gun in his holster. "They'll take her off your hands. They'll handle it from here."
"No, no, no, I can't. They won't take her." Joel said. Tess turned away from Joel, needing a break from his unwavering stare, only to find your eyes. The woman muttered a small 'please', the words almost silent as she quietly begged you. "They're not going to take her."
"They will. They will." She reassured turning back to him. "'Cause you'll convince them. Yes, you will. You both will. I, I never ask you for anything, not to take the chances we had."
"No."
"Not to- shut the fuck up 'cause I don't have time," Tess spoke, a tear softly rolling down her cheek. "This is your chance." Her voice broke. "You get her there... you keep her alive... and you set everything right." She tried her best to keep a steady tone, emotions overwhelming her as she understood she was living in what were going to be her last moments. "Everything." She repeated looking between you and Joel. "All the shit we did. Please say yes, Joel, please." She said, staring at him.
A loud groan startled the four as one of the men whom they'd presumed to be dead began crawling towards Ellie who'd had her back to him. "Oh fuck!" Ellie yelled out.
Without hesitation, Joel pulled out his revolver and shot it in the head, the sound deafening as it fell motionless onto the floor. Joel watched as small cordyceps wrapped around its limp fingers, his brows furrowing in concern. He ran towards the door and opened it just enough to hear the rampage of Infected running towards the state house. You muttered a string of curses beneath your breath. "How many?" Tess questioned.
"All of them. Maybe a minute." Joel breathed out as he walked back to the middle of the room. His breathing was shaky, his eyes darting around as he tried to think of a plan.
Tess's moves were panicked as she toppled the barrels of gasoline, tossing the small grenades across the floor in an act of desperation. "What are you doing?" Ellie asked. It was as though time had sped up. Before, it felt like everything was frozen, everyone was at a standstill, hope still in your mind that they had time. Had a chance. But now, now it was different.
"Making sure that they don't follow you." She grunted, the golden liquid flowing across the marble floor, her mind partially focused on the lighter sitting heavily in her pocket. "Joel... save who you can save." The two stared at one another for a moment, Joel's dark eyes welling up slightly before he dashed, grabbing Ellie and dragging her towards the back door.
His hand grazed your arm before you pulled away, staring at Tess for a moment longer with sullen eyes. "Just..." You muttered, looking at Joel for a second before turning back to the woman. "Just one second." Joel's mind was frazzled, freezing for a moment before continuing to drag Ellie, his breathing harsh.
"No! We're not leaving her!" Ellie yelled out as she tried pulling away from the man, hitting his arm. "Get off me, you fucker! I'm not going with you!" It was clear that Ellie didn't truly understand. In her eyes, Joel showed no hesitation in leaving Tess, but Tess knew.
The two women watched each other for a few beats. "He'll do it. I won't let him not." You both held a sense of understanding for each other, both holding a level of respect seen in your eyes. You turned around and walked away, your fists clenching as you furthered from Tess before leaving the building completely, breaking into a sprint to catch up with Joel and Ellie.
You had thought you were finally done. Finally finished with the losses that came with the world they were in. You thought that, by living outside the QZ, away from people, from populations, that you would be safe. Not just from Infected but from the gut-wrenching sadness and grief that came with losing people. The endless nights of questioning what you could have done differently, where it went wrong. And yet there you were, walking away from a woman you barely knew with a twisted stomach filled with regret that you couldn't do more, not only for Tess but for Joel, for Ellie.
You had almost caught up with Joel and Ellie when the explosion sounded out from behind them, glass shattering as smoke billowed from the building, screams echoing from inside. It was almost human, the three questioning for a moment if it was Tess; but then again, it was the screams of hundreds, echoing over top of one another to form some sort of symphony. Your hand landed on Joel's back as you tried to catch yourself from falling, the man quickly balancing you before pointing his rifle at the flames, waiting, his heart beating in his ears. You and Ellie stared at the blaze, the young girl's breaths shaky as tears welled in her eyes, looking at the building in which Tess had been standing moments ago.
It was silent. Despite the roaring flames ringing out harshly, somehow it was still silent. Eerily so. Joel was the first to walk away, you soon after gently grabbing at Ellie's arm to pull her along after a few moments. No words were shared despite none of them liking the quietness; what could they say?
Always (Western!AU)
You were content; living on a ranch with your husband and four kids. Even with the threat of danger, you knew your husband would protect your family, just as he knew you would protect him.
Hi I'm so glad to hear that you'll write anything that is not smart and I understand that so may I request a western AU arcane Vander x wife reader where the reader and Vander and the kids have a ranch and they're these bandits that tries to rob them but Vander stops them it's a against at the beginning comedy in the middle (if you're comfortable with that) and fluff at the end it's up to you if you want to do this or not I understand if you don't want to I'm so sorry to bother you by the way.
WesternAU!Vander x FemReader
2.3k Words
Warnings: Guns, violence, slight blood, use of pet names, use of 'Mama/Mom' and 'Daddy', no mentions of weight or skin tone, no use of y/n.
A/N: Omg don't apologise, I'm just excited to get my first request bahaha. Tbh I'm not great at writing comedy since my jokes usually consist of sarcasm and references so I did the best I could there </3
REQUESTS OPEN.
DURING THE DAY THE SUN WOULD BEAM ON YOUR BACK AS THOUGH THERE WERE A HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER DIRECTLY ABOVE YOU, LEAVING YOU TO SWEAT AND WRITHE IN THE BLISTERING HEAT. Yet somehow, every day without fail, as soon as the sun went down past the horizon the temperatures would drop. And so just like the night before, and the night before that, and likely tomorrow, you found yourself cuddled up with your husband, Vander, your head resting comfortably on his bare chest, feeling the way it fell and rose with each breath he took.
His bicep rested comfortably beneath your head, sprouting out the other side to land on your shoulder, absentmindedly stroking it in his sleep. Whilst Vander's broad chest alone made for a perfect pillow, his heat was what really got you. He was like a furnace. Emitting a level of heat so warm that in the peak of summer, there were times were he was banished to the sofa for just being too damn hot.
It was the deep of night, you and Vander sleeping comfortably in your room, the thick duvet covering the two of you, whilst the kids slept in their own. However, that was only after spending hours making a ruckus until they exhausted themselves. They were probably sprawled out across the bed so far their limbs were falling off, soft snores escaping their lips, the blankets half off the bed and on the floor. It was the perfect night. Or at least, it could have been.
Vander jolted in his sleep at the sound of footsteps on the porch; he wasn't exactly a light sleeper, after all, he managed to sleep through the kids waking up at the ass-crack of dawn, but he knew when something wasn't right. As much as he tried to move away from you slowly so as to not wake you, it was pointless, the moment his arm was moved out from under your head you were awake. You looked around for a moment to centre yourself before you paused.
The two of you sat motionless, waiting patiently for another noise. A jostle of the front door handle. You jumped out of bed; on any other night, the sudden sensation of the cold floor would have made you want to curl right back into the warmth and safety of the bed, but not now. Your senses were too heightened to have a single care in the world, your only thoughts were on the kids. There had been posters all throughout town earlier that day of a group of bandits, at the time however you'd brushed it off. There was no logical reason to believe they'd be a threat to you, right?
Without having to share a word you and Vander knew what to do. The bullets clinked, rattling together in Vander's palm as he dropped them as quietly as he could into the two compartments, metal clicking as he loaded the weapon. You quietly opened the bedroom door, taking soft steps as you walked down the hallway to the kid's room. The hardwood floor creaked softly beneath you, the walls feeling as though they were moments away from toppling down leaving you buried beneath.
The house was quiet, the moonlight shining through the windows lighting up the hallway just enough that you could avoid falling over the plethora of the kids' toys scattered across the ground. It was as if the hallway had grown longer; of course, it hadn't, but the way it seemed to stretch further beyond what you remembered made you feel like you'd never get to the kids.
The shotgun sat comfortably in Vander's hold, his grip so tight his knuckles turned white, his fingers getting that cold sensation you'd get when they just so tensed. His jaw clenched, his teeth almost aching as he took slow calculated steps. He kept the weapon aimed at the floor as he rounded the corner out of the hallway, looking around the living room for a moment before zoning in on the front door. The opened front door.
The door shut softly behind you as you scanned around the kids' room for a moment before rushing over to the closest bed, Vi's. "Hun, come on you need to wake up." You whisper, shaking her softly as a light groan slips her lips.
"Mom?" She mumbled; you quickly shushed, a pointed finger to your lips.
"I need ya to help me wake the others." Without question Vi did so, walking over to Powder next to her and jostling her awake, her voice still croaky. "Daddy's just dealing with something, I need you guys to be quiet and wait here just in case." Vi, Mylo, and Clagger knew better than to ask questions, knowing damn well that something had to have been going on for them to be woken in the middle of the night.
"Mama, what's Daddy doing?" Powder questioned, her soft monkey plush gripped tightly in her hold.
"Don't worry about Daddy, okay? Just stay here with your brothers and sister." You whispered, cradling her small face in your hold before turning to the door, listening out for even a peep.
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VANDER BARELY REGISTERED THE SOUND OF THE LIVING ROOM FLOORBOARDS CREAKING BEHIND HIM BEFORE HE SPUN AND AIMED, THE BARREL OF THE GUN POINTED RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES OF A MAN UNKNOWN TO HIM. He stood fairly tall, maybe 5'11, his skin tan. His short brown hair was mostly hidden beneath the western hat that sat upon his head. Vander couldn't see much of his face, most of it covered by the red bandana he had tied around his mouth reaching the bridge of his nose.
The two men stared at one another, Vander's shotgun still aimed, the man's pistol aimed right back. "The hell outta my house," Vander spoke lowly, his accent thick. His finger hovered over the trigger, eyes glaring daggers into that of the man across from him. Vander watched as the bandit's eyes trailed along his frame; they both knew that, if it really came down to it, Vander could pummel him, his biceps alone the width of his head.
Just as Vander thought he'd seen the look of retreat flash in the man's eyes, his stomach dropped to his ass at the sound of footsteps to his right. Shit.
Without moving his aim from the man, Vander turned his head to find another set of eyes glaring at him. The second man stood slightly taller than the first, only a couple inches at most, though, slightly skinnier. His eyes were a deep brown, so dark Vander's eyes almost mistook them to be holes in the middle of his head. Just as the first had, the second also had a bandana covering his face, the fabric tied tightly around the back of his head as he aimed a handgun right at Vander's head.
Vander looked between the two his heart beating within his chest. Sure he had two shots, two chances, but he knew that the moment he pulled the trigger the other man would just shoot right back. "Just give us your shit 'nd we'll get outta your hair." The first man snapped, accent thick, almost mumbled.
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"WHAT'S GOING ON?" Mylo asked eventually, the deafening silence killing him. It had felt as though they'd been stood for hours, waiting, listening, for something, anything to happen.
"I don't know baby." You muttered, your eyes focused on the door as though you could see straight through it. "Just wait here, okay? Don't move." You took slow steps toward the door, the metal handle screeching softly as you slowly turned it and poked your head out into the hall. Your heart froze at the sight of a man's back. The blanket of darkness put over the house made it difficult to see but you knew it wasn't Vander, his shoulders too narrow, stature not tall enough.
The door squeaked behind you leaving you frozen mid-step, watching to make sure the man wouldn't turn around. You kept ensuring yourself that he couldn't hear the pounding of your heart from down the hall - though you wouldn't be surprised - as you snuck back to your and Vander's shared bedroom. You kept your back hunched, some part of yourself thinking that it'd make you smaller, more difficult to see. Your breaths were shaky as you scanned the bedroom, your eyes zeroing in on the shoebox that sat on the floor right beside your bedside table.
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VANDER HELD HIS BREATH, HIS MIND RACING TRYING TO THINK OF WHAT TO DO. His shoulders tensed, his finger moments away from tightening over the trigger and shooting, preparing to ram his shoulder into the second man relying on hopes and prayers that, when he inevitably fired his gun, it wouldn't hit anywhere vital. Before he could move the sound of a gun firing made him want to jump in his skin. Bang. However, instead of feeling a searing pain in his own body, he heard a groan from his right, his head snapping to see the second taller man grabbing his left bicep in pain. "Shit!" He yelled, his voice coming out muffled.
Vander's wide eyes searched for a moment before landing on you, a pistol gripped tightly in your hold still aimed upwards, smoke softly billowing from the weapon. He turned back to the first man securing his grip on the shotgun once again, his eyes cold. The man looked between Vander and his partner, the hesitance in his eyes clear. However, that was quickly dealt with the moment Vander fired, the shell blasting through the wall right beside his head making him jump like a cat when startled.
The man turned and ran, his legs pumping as he jumped through the door, firing his gun wildly behind him, no effort put into actually trying to aim the thing other than pointing it in the general direction of the ranch. His partner was close behind - though lagging slightly seeing as he still had his hand clamped over his bicep in pain.
Your husband moved to stand in the doorway, shotgun still aimed as he watched the two jump on their horses and flee, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He let out a breath he hadn't noticed he'd been holding, his head whipping to you, placing the shotgun on top of the fireplace as he took long strides before standing in front of you.
His hands cradled your face looking you over for a moment, your fingers brushing his brown, slightly greying hair back and out of his face. Your hand sloppily dropped your revolver onto the wooden storage unit a couple feet beside you, your eyes remaining focused on Vander. "Darlin'." You muttered. Vander furrowed his brows for a moment as he followed your eye-line before landing on the bloody patch on his sleeve. He looked down for only a moment before looking back up.
"The kids alright?" He questioned gruffly, mind racing.
"They're fine." You tssk'd. "C'mere." You led him to the couch before sitting him down, pulling the sleeve of his shirt up just enough to see the damage. "It's not bad, just a skim." You said with a reassuring tone, though it was more for yourself than for Vander. He watched as you wandered to the kitchen to get a damp cloth, his eyes following as you came back to stand in front of him between his legs.
You were both silent as you gently cleaned the blood, silently noting to yourself to check on it in the morning. Your ears rang at the sudden silence within the house, the sound of crickets chirping outside bringing you a sense of relief. Your head turned back to the hallway at the sound of little feet pattering against the floor, the kids running down towards the two of you. "I told I told y'all to stay in the room." You softly scolded.
"We heard you talkin' so we thought it was okay," Claggor muttered as the four of them surrounded you and Vander. Mylo looked around the room, his eyes wide at the sight of scattered bullet holes.
"If I was there I woulda shot 'em dead. Bam!" He exclaimed, pointing a finger gun towards the still-opened front door. The boy ran over and shut the door, his bare feet hitting the hard floor as he rushed back to you, Vander, and the rest of the kids.
Vander chuckled softly. "Yeah, maybe next time I'll let ya deal with it instead." He joked, though, Mylo was none the wiser. Your hand fluffed through Powder's messy hair as you walked back to the kitchen, tossing the bloodied rag in the sink.
"Come on now. It's still late and y'all needa sleep." You said softly, exhaustion giving way and sinking into your bones. The kids knew better than to argue, the bags under their eyes revealing how tired they still were. Quickly, they began making their way back to their bedroom, though not without dragging their feet along the way. You watched them with a slight smile, shaking your head softly before turning back to Vander. "Let's go, big guy. 'M tired." You murmured with a yawn, rubbing your eyes for a moment before grasping his hand and pulling him gently towards the bedroom, your eyes looking at the door just for a moment to make sure Mylo had locked it.
Vander followed without complaint, watching you with soft eyes. The two of you got back into bed, the blanket falling comfortably onto you as your racing heart slowly settled. "Thank you," Vander murmured into your neck as he wrapped his arm around you from behind, his eyes fluttering closed as the warmth of the shared bed enveloped him.
"Mama? Daddy?" A soft voice called out, the bedroom door creaking open to reveal a young Powder on the other side, monkey plush in tow. Without a word, you held out your arm, Powder running over with soft giggles before jumping into bed. Your arms wrapped around the young girl as you pressed a kiss to her forehead, gently caressing her as you closed your eyes, waiting for the call of sleep.
Vander watched silently. He was happy, and content. He'd take a thousand more bullets to protect his family. And it only helped to know you had his back. Always.
