so i want to add something, since i ran out of steam on the original post before i could make this point. MORE TEXT AHEAD, SORRY.
first of all: i’m well aware that this is how the cosmetics industry has always functioned. for a long, long time, cosmetics have been a vital aspect of performing femininity, which people are regularly pressured into, whether it’s their choice or it’s imposed on them. it sucks! it feels like there’s no way out of it because it’s a deeply ingrained social issue.
still, because of the ubiquity of cosmetics on social media– instagram and youtube being the worst offenders, imho– there are certain things that have become more and more accessible to younger and younger people. that’s a modern problem. kids are fashioning themselves after those models earlier than they used to, and social media makes it easier for them to know how. in some situations this is harmless, and helps kids express themselves. either way, it’s tricky.
it’s easy to brush those interests off as a hobby, but with wearing makeup comes the decades of baggage of it, and all the messages that accompany it, which we are very quick to internalize. when you start wearing makeup, you’re suddenly the target audience of the cosmetic industry– the younger you are, the less prepared you are to deal with the effects of it. it’s hard for me to wrangle with these things, and i’m 25. it’s nearly impossible for a child to do it healthily.
i want to make this clear, too: if you wear makeup of your own volition, you aren’t somehow contributing to you own oppression. you are not oppressing yourself or other people for wearing makeup. you’re not doing something wrong by watching makeup tutorials on youtube, or wearing it every day, or posting selfies.
but if you don’t wear makeup, you’ve probably felt the pressure to do so, or to groom yourself cosmetically in one way or another. this is especially true with people who aren’t thin, white, able-bodied, and cis. many women don’t have a choice but to wear makeup in a very specific fashion in order to be perceived as women, to be considered for a job, to be regarded as attractive, etc. etc.
seems like you’re damned if you do, damned if you don’t. so what are we supposed to do? whether we want to keep wearing makeup for fun, don’t like wearing makeup but must, or don’t wear makeup at all?
i don’t have an answer, i’m still searching for it, but i do think there are some steps in the right direction.
- if you wear makeup, be critical of the language you use, whether you’re talking about yourself or other people. negative talk is so, so contagious. here’s an example: instead of saying “contour helps you slim down your face” try “contour brings back dimension that you lose when you put on foundation.” the focus is not on “losing weight” but rather the natural appearance of the face.
makeup talk is chock-full of these insidious reminders that our god-given faces aren’t good enough. start to assess those things and rephrase them. when i was at sephora, the difference it made while talking to clients was enormous. normalizing their features and speaking positively was the place i always tried to start.
- for god’s sake, don’t let kids be exposed to that talk. kids should not feel like having a fat face, or thick brows, or “looking like a boy,” or having splotches, or acne, or body hair, or natural lips is a bad thing. the list goes on and on. if you have any sort of audience, this is vital, because kids will be present and listening.
- don’t make excuses for the industry. don’t make excuses for companies, and don’t make excuses for makeup artists. makeup is an artform, and in a perfect world, the industry would be built on self-expression and creativity. it’s not. we can be, as individuals. but as consumers we also have an inextricable relationship with the industry, so we have to be critical.
- if you’re capable, TALK ABOUT IT. talk about the problems! talk about how it makes you feel! talk about how being “beautiful” or “looking like a woman” should not be built on the inferiority of 90% of other people.
- lastly, this may be corny but… actively look for beauty in other people’s faces. i don’t mean, like, long lashes, or a striking eye color. i mean look at their features and think about how they’re remarkable. when you get in this habit you start to love simple things, and it makes it easier to love simple things about your own face. easier said than done, but it’s something to practice.
anyhow, i’ve enjoyed talking to you all about this and it’s been very very interesting reading your tags and comments. if you have any other thoughts, anecdotes, or if you think my perspective is lacking, please don’t hesitate to come chat! ✌🏼
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