evenshadow

[evenshadow]

The Weather Outside is Frightful

All Tessa wants is her perfect Hallmark Christmas movie romance, but when a Christmas Eve snow storm wakes the thing living beneath the ice, it looks like kissing someone under the mistletoe is going to have to wait...

Synopsis under the cut.

Tess is tired of being single, but this Christmas she has a plan. She's emailed her aunt who owns a cafe in the coziest tourist trap town you've ever seen, and is going to spend her two weeks of holiday PTO making hot chocolate for every hot toy maker, bakery owner, and ice skate rental booth operator in town. If Hallmark movies have taught her anything, it's that leaving her busy big city job and enjoying the holidays is the key to finding her Prince(ss) Charming.

At first, the plan really does seem like it's going to work, too. Her marketing expertise is helping grow her aunt's business, and their next door neighbor is the eligible bachelor who runs the local independant bookstore. It's all coming together, just like Hallmark promised her it would. There's even a snow storm coming to blanket the mountain town in fresh powder and force them all to snuggle up warm!

As the snow storm hits on Christmas Eve, Tess is ready with fresh baked gingerbread cookies and a good book (borrowed from the hottie next door), but something doesn't feel right. Her aunt is acting strangely, drawing symbols on the windows and hanging amulets above the doors. People are leaving town in droves even though the winding mountain roads are extremely hazardous. She tries to put everyone's anxiety down to small town superstition, but she's never known her no-nonsense aunt to act this way.

Late into the night, cozied up to the fire, the ice on the lake cracks in two. The bookseller is knocking on the door with no coat and a smile that's too wide, and Tessa realizes she is not in a Hallmark movie after all.

[evenshadow]

Be my Beta!

All Tessa wants is her perfect Hallmark Christmas movie romance, but when a Christmas Eve snow storm wakes the thing living beneath the ice, it looks like kissing someone under the mistletoe is going to have to wait...

I'm looking for beta readers for my 70k word Hallmark Christmas themed horror novel! I'm on my third draft and she's feeling pretty good, just needs some outside feedback and a setting spray and she'll be ready for her debut. I am looking for readers who love horror/monsters/creature features, who like romance, and are familiar with Hallmark Christmas movie tropes.

I'm releasing the book to beta readers in 4 small sections with a simple Google form asking questions about plot/vibes/characters. I am also open to doing a swap if you have a horror WIP too.

If you're interested, please DM me, or reach out to me on discord at evenshadow.

[evenshadow]

Hi Mark,

Happy Monday! As per my last email, I have turned the printer on and off but it is still telling everyone the date of their death. I understand your workload has doubled due to recent events, but it is stressing out everyone in the department and affecting our work output. Andy has been particularly upset by this, as apparently he is going to drown next Tuesday. I feel that daily reminders of this are not helping his mental state.

Also, the intern that I trained last week is nowhere to be seen, but sometimes I can hear him crying in the cubicle next to me. When I stand up to check, no one is there. If you could disable his login access, I think that would be best.

If you'd prefer to discuss this in a meeting with your supervisor, please send through some available timeslots and I'll put something in our schedules. If you can also let me know which meeting rooms are not currently full of mirrors, that would be great. I am having trouble finding any rooms that are both free and conducive to a productive work environment.

I hope this email kills us both.

-Barb

[evenshadow]

I think I'll keep a few adverbs in the draft, as a treat.

[evenshadow]

a grumpy, wealthy old person invites you to their fabulous mansion for a weekend murder mystery party to celebrate their 90th birthday. you don't know why but, it's not like you had better plans. besides, you did recently win that scrabble tournament so maybe they just wanted a bunch of smart local celebrities to attend.

how fun.

wouldn't it be funny if one of us were really murdered? you all joke at the inaugural cocktail party. you notice everyone seems to know each other already, or at least know of each other. they're colleagues. you're the only odd one out.

over the course of the evening, you begin to suspect something is not quite right. the NDA you sign is pretty substantial. all the doors are locked. the host is too charming. your phone doesn't work.

when the host drops dead for real, no one is really even that surprised (or even bothered, frankly). but that's not the worst of it.

the worst of it is that you've finally figured out how everyone knows each other. this is something of an annual industry retreat that you've stumbled into.

they're all assassins.

now you've got to make it out of this weekend alive, without anyone figuring out that you're not supposed to be there.

you have 44 hours left. good luck!

[evenshadow]

5 Tips to Write a Better Blurb

Blurbs are hard. Writing copy for an ad (which is what your blurb is, regardless of if your product is free or not) is a completely different beast than writing your book. You have a lot of excitement to dredge up and very few words to do it with.

Read a bunch of other blurbs of books you really liked in your genre. Also, read a lot of blurbs of books you picked up because you liked the blurb but then ended up hating the book itself. Figure out what you like, and how those blurb writers draw you in.

Show the conflict. Make me wonder how the MC is going to achieve their dream despite their obstacles. If there's no tension, there's no intrigue.

Avoid too many proper nouns that the audience won't know yet. This is particularly important for fantasy/sci-fi. I don't care that your MC is destined to be the High Whatsit of Whositzville and that the Council of the Twelve Doodad Moons wants to steal the Blurgh. Give me something I recognize so I can care about it, and don't bog me down with details.

Side characters and plots don't really belong here, no matter how fun and good they are. Focus on the meat of the story.

Use rhetorical questions only when absolutely necessary, or just leave one as a treat for the end. The reader should be asking those on their own without your prompting if your blurb grabs them.

Happy blurbing!

Feel free to drop your blurb in my ask box if you would like some help.

[evenshadow]

my short story about a weird sentient tree is getting published in a lit mag!

screaming crying throwing up

[evenshadow]

I was on this first date once with a guy who was a biologist, and I was writing a horror novel at the time centered on vulture bees (which are really fucking cool), so I thought it would be fun to share my new knowledge about those with him.

Turns out, "they use rotting flesh instead of pollen, and they usually start with the eyes!" is a bad date conversation starter.

Some people just don't deserve your fun facts.

[thatuselesshuman]

You love writing you love writing you love writing you love writing you love writing it isn't a chore it isn't a chore it isn't a chore you wanna write bro stop being a little bitch

[rubyleaf]

Honestly? My main piece of advice for writing well-rounded characters is to make them a little bit lame. No real living person is 100% cool and suave 100% of the time. Everyone's a little awkward sometimes, or gets too excited about something goofy, or has a silly fear, or laughs about stupid things. Being a bit of a loser is an incurable part of the human condition. Utilize that in your writing.

[evenshadow]

If you've ever really gotten to know someone who presents themselves as 100% cool and suave, you'll see that those people are either deeply insecure and/or are incredibly deliberate in saying what they think people want to hear in order to get what they want or be liked.

Being cool and always saying the right thing does not come naturally to the vast majority of people. We are all awkward little balls of shame, either desperate to be loved or too scared to feel anything or both at the same time.

If you have a character who is a cool, cigarette-smoking, leather-jacket-wearing, motorcycle riding badass who writes tender poetry and gets all the dates, that person is FALLING APART ON THE INSIDE. Let the reader see that, it's fun.

Cut them open and show us their insides, we love it.

[evenshadow]

a year or so ago I put out a free little solo ttrpg on itch that I thought no one ever looked at or played

I just peeked at my dashboard, and 20 whole people have downloaded it and looked at it and seen the thing

and to some people that's hardly anything, but I'd like to think at least one of those 20 people actually played my game and experienced it in some way

and that makes me really happy because I imbued it with a lot of love and fun and I just wanted someone else to have fun too

so

yeah

[evenshadow]

I think it's so fun to go from a don't steal my characters! don't steal my ideas! mindset to a

please, please please steal my ideas mindset

like, do you want them? take them! take all of them! there's more where that came from if you want! why don't you steal these title ideas too, while you're at it? the ending's not done, but you know how to write an ending, don't you??

now it's your problem to figure out how to tie all those plot threads together! it's your dreams these characters will haunt in the middle of the night!

finally I can be free

[evenshadow]

I remember being 16 on Gaia Online and writing short stories for artists in exchange for art of my OCs and god what a utopia that was.

Making art in exchange for more art? YES PLEASE.

[evenshadow]

Okay, so some asshole [my beloved partner] demanded [gently suggested] that I try writing fanfic to get myself out of my deep, deep pit of writer's despair [it is a puddle and I am drowning in it].

I haven't written fanfic in a few years [dear god I'm so old it's been like 15 years how has this happened], so please help me decide what to write. Please.

What should I write?

ANGSTY angst angst angst

sweet cozy romance

a sprawling fantasy epic, but with kissing

a murder mystery, no kissing

the sluttiest erotica anyone's ever seen

Voting ended onMay 20, 2024

[writeblrgarden]

PLANT GROWERS - MEET THE WINNERS - VICTORIA

Meet Victoria, who got seventh place in our grow a plant event in november! Victoria goes by she/her, was once on a terrible and short-lived reality dating show involving hiding in a box full of go-pros and letting a stranger smell her neck, and you can find her at @evenshadow. She has been writing for about 16 years, writing horror, mystery, perchance a dash of romance.

Tell us about the WIP you'd like to talk about today.

I'll be talking about The Weather Outside is Frightful. All Tessa wants is her perfect Hallmark Christmas movie romance, but when a Christmas Eve snow storm wakes the thing living beneath the ice, it looks like kissing someone under the mistletoe is going to have to wait…

Describe your writing process. Do you like to plan everything or are you more spontaneous?

I love planning and outlining. Planning and outlining are my favourite. I recently discovered zero drafting, and it's been a delight! Even despite my outlining, I usually go through 3-6 drafts of heavy revision on big projects before I feel happy enough to share with others. I love the idea of setting aside big chunks of time to work on my writing, but often it happens in 15-60 minute sprints between various adult responsibilities.

What have you found to be the most challenging and/or rewarding about writing?

The editing process is rough for me, as my own toughest critic. I find it tedious, and it's often hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel when I'm elbows-deep in the fourth draft and it feels like nothing is coming together. Beating that manuscript until it does what I want it to, and watching it shine at the end of all that is so rewarding. Having other people read it and like it is an incredible feeling too, but regardless of whether it actually makes it to the light of day, I love completing a work of art that I feel proud of.

Below the read more is more of our conversation with Victoria

What inspires you to write?

I want to live my dream of keeping people up at night because they're afraid something in the shadows will eat them. When you're scared of monsters under your bed, you're not worrying about whatever else life is throwing at you at the moment. I want to wrap readers in a comforting blanket of relief and escapism- except the blanket is made out of nightmares.

Share some advice for other writers.

A happy writer is a productive writer! If you feel like you're not getting as much written as you want to or it's harder than it should be, sometimes the answer isn't optimizing your writing routine but quitting your job and dumping your hot romantic interest and demanding better for yourself. Maybe, idk. Also don't use so many adverbs or something.

What do consider your writing strength?

Atmosphere! I love moody castles, foreboding forests, and cozy libraries of forbidden knowledge. I want my readers to be able to feel like they're there.

What has been the nicest compliment you've received or what has been the toughest criticism you've received?

I once had a teacher say "you're so much better than everyone else" and I've been insufferable ever since.

What do you love the most about writing?

When you get to a dramatic or important scene you've been looking forward to and you get to live in it and see it take shape and form in front of your eyes- that's the best feeling.

[evenshadow]

me: writes a thousand words

me: great, I promised myself a break after 500 words, let's just check

word count: +212 words

me: ...

[jacqueswriteblrlibrary]

Hey writeblr! Here's a challenge: can you summarize what you're writing in one sentence?

[evenshadow]

Woman goes on vacation only to be faced with horrible bloodthirsty monsters, and is very tired about it.