Bloody marry x cesdoc thoughts.
Simon is the Butcher, right? Allen is the doctor
Cesare and Doc are safe on the ship on the way back to Steve’s planet post cannon for Hail Mary.
Cesare has only called Doctor exactly that or variations of it. Doc, Doccy.. it’s become his name rather than a title. Doc is okay with that, he thinks. That’s all he was back home too. He was Jane for a short time until the title Doctor was bestowed unto him. It felt far more fitting than Jane. Neither were good though. He didn’t want to be The Doctor anymore but the thought of being Jane made his skin crawl.
Cesare finally asks him one day, “I know we call you Doc but what’s your real name? There’s no way you got named Doctor”
Doc freezes, what was his real name? Being jane felt like trying to put on an extra small silicon glove onto a wet hand. Doctor.. Doctor was the closest he’d felt to having a real name yet hearing it still made him think of his days on Eden, proving why a trip to the doctor really is something scary.
“I don’t wanna talk about it.”
Cesare frowned and looked at him, this guy was more secrets than real person.
“You can pick another name y’know. I’m cool calling you Doc if that’s what you want but there’s always a man behind the coat y’know? Plus I get the feeling you don’t actually have a doctorate. Stolen valor ain’t cute back on earth.”
“Neither is it on Eden… They called me Doctor because I was the closest we had to a real one.. I had another name but it’s..” he looked down at the tracks on the spaceship flooring, “it makes my skin crawl to think about even hearing it”
“Well… what if you pick a new name? It could be anything you want. You just look so.. I dunno- you look empty in the eyes when I call you Doctor, it’s like a sad doll in the back corner of a goodwill”
“Goodwill?”
“Just pick a name Doccy, c’mon. Everybody’s thought about it at least once, you gotta have something”
“Allen..”
Cesare paused, looking at him for a moment. That was maybe the most vulnerability the guy seemed capable of.
“Allen it is then”
