bart the fart😹

I heart my wife (he/him)

[evildrbart]

I thought I should do one of these because I have a very small presence here now, so here's my intro :D

PFP IS BY ME AND @kalied0skull I drew the sketch and they did line art and coloring!!!! IT'S SO GOOD AND I LOVE IT 🫶🫶🫶🫶

My name Bartholomew zlorp zlop the 3rd and I'm from outer space !! 👽

I go by Bart 😸✌️

I am a minor,, so nothing weird...

I am unlabeled and genderqueer and i use all pronouns (my partner is @alienturkey)

My current fandoms are; Voltron, Slay the princess, and The Outsiders(I'm back in the fucking building)

I have a sister ( @shsl-box-worshipper ) and she mostly makes code lyoko and detco and sonic content, go follow her if you like those things !!

i mostly post rambles, my wife's asks, and art 😸

I gotta PhD in freakology 🥹🥹🥹

headcanon masterlist for ck

Keith headcanon/kluri au masterlist

Bart talk's/talks = non reblog posts

Bart reblogs = reblogs

Barts asks = asks

My stinky sister = asks from my sister

Bart's art= my art

Bart's fics = my fanfics

Wife posting = stuff about my gf or asks from her

Moot interaction = stuff from my mutuals/about my mutuals

My Ko-fi for commissions/donations !!

[evildrbart]

To add to my last 2 posts here and here

[evildrbart]

Keith and shiro are soulmates like in the literal interpretation of the word like their souls are meant to meet and intertwine they are meant to be so close to eachother their skin feels like one whether it's friends brothers lovers doesn't matter

[evildrbart]

Keith and shiro are a non-romantic (besides like Keith having a puppy-crush on shiro at one point because he was the first person to be nice to him in a while) sibling adjacent secret third thing I know it.... They're so qpr you can't even comprehend it..... They are always in each other's space and arguing but also complimenting each other and defending each other.... They're hugging and snuggling and wrestling and blurring the lines of what is and isn't platonic or familial or romantic but it's all soul-crushingly intimate....... They don't know what they are ... I know what they are.....,.....

[evildrbart]

Now playing | ♪ | My Favorite Game - The Cardigans

Orbit playlist | ♪ | Kirara concert vibes playlist

Og Orbiting you post here and here (read them in order pls)

I meant to post these a little while ago, but it's actually kinda fitting that I post this on the first day of pride month !!

I have decided on a name and that name will be Orbiting you or Orbit as short hand

For Kirara or Kira Kira concerts she mostly stays within a 90s grunge/metal/goth metal vibe that has influences from folk/Americana/the blues with intermittent orchestral peices (I headcanon Keith to write music)

Lana is quite tall at 5'11 (she always says she's shorter than that) her clothes are loosely 2000s/90s inspired but like. Loosely. Like low-rise jeans and camis and polos and booty shorts

Kira is 5'9 (she hasn't finished growing) in her personal life she really dgaf car oil stained tank tops and dirt stained bootcut jeans w/ dirty scuffed cowboy boots (they're her dads) but in concert she looks like a goth country star or she's wearing like itty bitty black dresses and in the military she has a really nice uniform

I imagine their relationship is very manipulative at first and there's also the moral dilemma of having a weird sort of relationship with a warlord from the nation you're trying to fight against

Future plans

I have plans to write a fic for this au, as soon as school is out

I have several finished sketches I plan to render

I have a wip that I plan to fully render

I have gacha versions of them that I haven't posted because I'm a little gacha kid

Tags

@heartsforjohnnycake @jelyp1e @japanjoanie

Tell me if you would like to be tagged in the future ^-^

Ko-fi

Please consider donating to my Ko-fi

[evildrbart]

See the thing you all forget about Keith and shiro is that they have known eachother for a very long time

Like yes they care about each other more than anybody else on the team but also they are very mean to each other

Shiro would not hold back on giving consequences because he knows Keith and he understands what Keith needs and that is direct communication of what he's done wrong

Keith is kinda rude to shiro because he knows shiro finds it very funny and Keith knows shiro needs to fucking relax

Shiro and Keith are always like lightly hitting eachother or wrestling (specifically Keith attacking shiro) play fighting essentially because Keith likes contact

So from the outside it looks like they have a strained relationship but actually it's healthier than most of the paladins relationships

*Lance is injured*

Shiro: are you okay

Keith: anyone with a workin set a eyes can see that he ain't, dummy

*Keith is injured*

Shiro: you dumb bitch

Keith: can't believe you didn't save me, I guess ya hate me now

*shiro is injured*

Keith: can't believe ya didn't see that comin

Shiro: *holding back laughter* yeah I was too busy saving your ass

Keith: *sigh and judgmental look* shoulda ended ya

[r0bee]

Important discussions happening rn (ranking the paladins by how much I would or would not like to smoke with them)

[sugerbugslug]

me with keith

[evildrbart]

(some special garrison induction event where Keith and lance have met for the 2nd or 3rd time)

*fall out boy playing*

Keith: waht is assaulting my eardrums

Lance: huh.i had pegged you as fhe type of guy to listen to fall out boy

Keith: *thickest country accent you've ever heard*you ain't pegged me at all because you can't get it up. PUSSY (he's being mean for no reason again)

[evildrbart]

Galra!broganes x slay the princess

Galra!shiro as the adversary (and eventually the eye of the needle)

He's itching for a good fight. He refuses to fair and plain and won't take to you well if you don't fight fair. He's bold and fierce, he harbors a strict set of values. He's honest and won't break his chains unless his opponent has proved their strength

He knows what he wants and harbors no unwarranted compassion or pity (except for one person)

Galra!Keith as the witch (he becomes the thorn)

He yearns to spite those who have hurt him. He fights to win, keeping his cards close to his chest and using anything he can against who he's fighting.

He is opportunistic and jagged at the edges, his emotions are constantly changing due to his reactionary nature, he doesn't know what makes him in his malformed contradictory shape

( @heartsforjohnnycake idk if you wanted to be tagged but I think I cooked)

[evildrbart]

Keith writes a shit ton of music in space and when everybody but Keith goes back to earth he gives the sheet music to pidge as a parting gift because he imagined her singing it (it's his thoughts but her voice he imagined) and the music is the crane wives (band not albums)

[evildrbart]

Pidge and Keith as ponyboy and johnny....

[evildrbart]

Commission interest check

if I where to do commissions would you buy one and what would you get

yes, a fanfic

yes, art

no, no one would buy them

no, but you should open them for others

my special button

Voting ended onMay 31

I already do traditional and a bit of digital, nothing would be fully rendered but I can do block shading and coloring, I can do suggestive but not full nsfw, I can do full body with up to 3 people on digital and 2 people on traditional, I'm willing to do any fandom/OCs as long as you give a brief description of the character so I know how to characterize them

For writing I can do mostly short blurbs/one shots around 2000 words or less, I can do smut, angst or fluff, though I'm best at smut and fluff, for the fandoms/OCs it's the same as art

It's probably not going to be super expensive for most things like $30 or less

I'll start accepting commissions after June 9th because I'll be on break

@kalied0skull @char-char-f0x @fr3akology @scalls @dr-gl0rbiez @bookishlunarkat @heartsforjohnnycake @jelyp1e @jerseyshoremassacre @cloversplace @brainwasheddd @alienturkey @d1sapp01ntm3nt @krow-offical @japanjoanie that's all I can think of !! Sorry if you didn't wanna be tagged 😔

[evildrbart]

hi im so sorry ive gotten ur asks but i only js saw them bc tumblr hates me 😓😓

It's okk 😸😸

[callmelyc]

Kluestion of the week 🎉👏

Which half of Klance is more annoying when sick?

Lance, he is whiny and dramatic

Keith he is so stubborn he doesn't let people care for him until lance forces it

Lance, he's stubborn and insists he's fine (he isn't)

both, they're super annoying when sick in diff ways

neither, when sick the fight leaves them and they're more reasonable

Lance bc when Keith is sick Keith had no protests

Keith bc when Lance is sick lance has no protests

Voting ended onJun 2

[romticknight]

Hi chat who would prefer being called "good girl" for science

Kluri addition

Lana

Keira

Both 👁️

Voting ended onMay 27

(The science is the scenarios in my head I go to sleep to)

[evildrbart]

i was trying to find ur kluri au to come up w names and reply to ur ask but you lowk just kept making correct statements and i HAD to like and reblog 😓

I was giggling bcuz I was playing Minecraft w/ my dad and my phone just kept going off like every few seconds and I would look and b like oh it's Aris(? I think that's ur name) again

Also tyvm ur always right too highkey we're psychologically linked 🥹🥹🥹

I have a few things I'm working on!!! So watch out for updates to the masterlist because I try to update it whenever I make a hc or au post!! I currently have a galra broganes stp au I'm working on, Keith w/ a floater rib, and I just recently made a post about a healthy Keith swap au and I have many more plans (my notes app and drafts want me DEAD w/ how much I go in there)

Us btw

Also kluri au is the first 2 posts on the masterlist I think

I am constructing an evil kluri au playlist and also I have some art that I might post at some point w/ the playlist when I finish it