he felt like he was seconds from SHATTERING, fragile mind, heart, soul——– all hidden behind this facade that he’d built up in order to protect himself. layer by layer kate tried to strip him from everything he’s become since the time his dad first laid a hand on him to that very moment. there was a protective shell around him that he didn’t WANT to break—— most days at least. because, though he’d never admit it, she as the first person who even came close to cracking the outer most wall he’s constructed. at her question, he let out a sigh, turned & used to table as support as he slid to the cold ground, needing to feel something REAL to bring him back, to set his mind into gear again, hands framing his face with glasses pushed up away from tear-filled eyes. ❛ i don’t fucking understand why you’d WANT to.. all i ever do is hurt you, sometimes intentionally. because i’m not the guy you think i am & i don’t know how many different RENDITIONS of that statement i need to say to you until you finally understand. ❜
there was suddenly so much she wanted to say. part of her wanted to scream at him , for hurting her over and over. but the much stronger part of her , wanted to tell him it was okay. SHE FORGAVE HIM. ❝ richie. ❞ his name had always felt like coming home. but tonight was different. it felt more sacred. her feet moved , one step forward before she paused. there was still that line between them. even the air between them had changed. she could feel the ghost of his fingers around her throat. and that was not something she was ready just yet to relive. ❝ i-i know this guy you’re pretendin’ to be , it’s not you. you hide who you are. f-from me , from seth , from everyone… even yourself. ——— a-and you said it y-yourself , I MAKE YOU FEEL. so you think if you keep hurtin’ me , i’m gonna walk away. but i’m not gonna let you do that. okay ? i-i.. i’m not gonna leave you. ❞
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