That One Bitch

I'm Kayla and I have no idea what to do with my life. I'm weird, embrace me.

[asmrosa-deactivated20170831]

[violentwavesofemotion-deactivat]

[loloftheday]

Our cat had all four roommates feeding him each day because he acted like he was starving and we didn’t know that the other roommate already fed him. This was our solution, hopefully he will slim down a bit.

[chickenfarmersan]

[antique-scarecrow]

i fucking lost it when she opened the fridge

[psychotictea]

A big mood

[lsleofskye]

[make--it--gayer]

[saintlaurentgirl-deactivated201]

*me to the bartender* i want something that doesn’t taste like alcohol but has a lot of alcohol in it

[with-practice]

[anxietyproblem]

BY KAYDEHINES

[ninenine-brooklyn]

[looseferrets]

Sabrina the Teenage Witch is an expert at counter-spells. 

x

[devon-aiden-deactivated20160208]

I am legit crying right now

[jonstavk]

Can you believe that “Treat yo self” from Parks + Rec became so iconic that people now use it as an excuse to plunge themselves into debt

[ifyouhadmefuckyou-deactivated20]

it be like that sometimes

[sophieturneristhebest]

Joe dressed as Sansa is the best thing ever

[vikingpoteto]

not to be dramatic, but Okoye telling her bitch ass husband she would end him without hesitation when he tried to manipulate her changed me as a person and cured my depression. 

[inquisitale-deactivated20211217]

“would you kill me my love?”

“for wakanda? No question.”

a woman in my theater: “oH I HEARD THAT!!!!”

[they-call-me-marlon]

Wanda Maximov on the otherhand won’t uninstall her dating sim to save the universe.

[warandpeas]

Slutty Witch

[theyellowbrickroad]

i had the best human interaction of all time last night. i was sitting at a bar eating an appetizer and this guy comes up to order a drink and stares at my food and comments how good it looks. when i am drunk i use the word bitch like it is a comma, i plug it into any space in a sentence possible. so naturally the first thing i say to this stranger is, “go ahead and take one, bitch.”

he looks SO shocked and taken aback and goes “what did you just say? how do you know my name?” so i sit there for a moment trying to figure out what the fuck he is talking about, and then go, “…. bitch?” and he looks so relieved and tells me his name is mitch.

i cannot stop thinking about this. oh my god. imagine going into a bar and someone you know for a fact youve never met approaches you and says “go ahead and take one, mitch.” im cracking the fuck up. he looked like he thought this was the fucking truman show

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

I don’t hang out with white dudes who use mustache wax anymore bc it’s only a matter of time b4 they fall in love with me and find out I’m gay and write a song on their…idk..their fuckin harpsichord or banjo or ukulele about the girl from the forest who broke their heart but also they don’t even like hiking

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

i know this seems oddly specific & that’s bc it is

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

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