gods and monsters —

shim "grey" changmin, twenty-three years old. gifted with adaptation at an expert level, he resides in the brotherhood.

[fcxgrey]

yes, but it'll take forever. { ` retains that pout on her lips, fingers twitching at the hand on top of hers as the butterflies in her stomach flutters, a laugh slipping from her lips } oh? that sounds more like a you problem though. { ` teases, making sure to keep him upright even as she slips from behind him to float in front of the male, carefully slipping her hands around the nape of his neck and lacing her fingers together before lifting his head upright to face her } there, how's that?

what else have you got to do with your time? { ` smiles a little brighter with her pout, able to see it from a perspective entirely too close; his brow quirks with her next words, however } oh? well-- { ` haltingly, he watches as she moves, tilting his weight forward slightly to assure he remains upright and doesn't land on his ass on the floor } it's better. { ` murmurs, tipping into her again, sure to catch her lips in a soft kiss }

[fcxgrey]

{ ` smiles against his lips as she presses a bit more into it only to pull away slightly in favor of looking at him when he speaks, taking up a small pout } my hair is different from what i wear. it defines me as a person basically! { ` sighs a bit, giving him a small squeeze as she squints at the ends of her hair } maybe when my hair's not that damaged, i'd feel better. { ` hides a grin } or maybe if you gave a few more kisses.. who knoooooooows?

{ ` follows her lead and pulls backward to allow a better look at her face, taking in her pout with a low hum as he gives a slow--almost negligent--nod; amused, if anything, by her preoccupation when he's so thoroughly enchanted } it'll heal. { ` his hand--the real one--lifts to hover over hers, pressing to the back of it and drawing in more of that warmth, while his other hangs at his side, obscured beneath the sleeve of his jacket } well, you'll have to move to an easier spot. my neck isn't that flexible, soojung... { ` grins }

[fcxgrey]

{ ` humming in content when he leans back, soojung makes sure to keep herself balanced and upright in the air enough to hold his weight as a laugh escapes her } was it really? i'll have to wash my hair more next time before i try then. { ` smiles further at the kiss, shifting to return it before leaning forward more to kiss the corner of his mouth } you can't even see me right from here. { ` laughs } but thank you! i was getting tired of those roots. { ` wrinkles her nose }

{ ` finds no issue in letting her support his weight for a moment, confident enough in her ability to close his eyes and lean into the kiss, lips curving against hers before his smile gives way to a quiet chuckle } i've seen enough to know that i like whatever look you wear. { ` murmurs easily, cracking open an eye in bemusement } do you feel better now? root-free?

[fcxgrey]

{ ` did she trick him successfully? maybe—nope, nope. her smile drops slightly at his words, lower lip jutting out already as a small whining sound escapes, moving to lean forward further against his back, hands slipping from his eyes to slide around his neck as she presses forward to rest her cheek against his, nuzzling the slightest bit } eiiiiiiiiiii—your sense of smell is too great for my trickery, o'mighty changmin.

{ ` but of course, he could admit that scent is only one of the ways that he's learned to identify her--he could, but he doesn't quite think he'd escape the vague sense of shame that would come with it--though changmin remains silent, merely leaning backward into her embrace, weight balanced on the heel of his boot as his head slips onto her shoulder, dark strands falling away from his eyes. } it's a shame. your imitation was spot on. { ` he teases, turning his head to catch her eye before his lips brush over her cheek } i like that color on you.

[fcxgrey]

{ ` her lips curve ever so slightly at his question, shifting a bit as she fakes a small baby-like cough } i'm—sick! { ` brushes her fingers over his forehead slightly as she presses on — though not too sure as why she even bothered to fake it in the first place; he should know it's her, at least, she hopes } have you seen soojung? i heard she dyed her hair some crazy color agaaaaaaaaaain!!

{ ` gives a long, almost exaggerated sort of hum as he nods slowly, making no move to step out of her makeshift blindfold and turn to look at her } are you? we should get that looked at in the infirmary. { ` his fingers curl into the hem of his shirt, and for the first time in a while, he finds himself able to focus past the dull ache of metal attached to skin, bone, joint and nerve } i haven’t seen her. { ` pauses only slightly } but you must have. you smell a little like hair dye.

[fcxgrey]

{ ` she's impossibly careful with the way she moves—sole objective meaning to sneak up behind the taller male as she floats up from behind him, slim arms outreached as her hands move to cover his eyes, leaning into him slightly } guess who, delinqmin oppa. { ` tries her best at her "jinri voice" }

{ ` for his part, if he notices something off in the air--a warm puff of air near his back, or the scent of a familiar shampoo and the faintest echoes of hair dye--he doesn't show it. instead, his lips twitch into the smallest of smiles as warm, soft hands lay over his eyes; heart summarily skipping a beat in the way that it usually does, despite the bemusement that takes him whole with her choice of "identity" } jinri-- { ` a feigned gasp } you sound kinda strange.

[fcxtempest]

— titanium .

[fcxtempest]

                  { ♛— ; } she opts not to comment on the grip on her wrist, attention significantly more focused on steadying the brotherhood member as she moves with him, pressing close enough to offer her own body for balance as she shifts her stance a bit more and pushes to stand slowly. the gush of blood that follows doesn’t escape her awareness, soft lips pressing together as she takes it as an indication to move faster—of all the prisoners, he seemed to be the least likely to survive if they don’t get out of here.

she was never one for having innocent blood on her hands.

“tell me if you need to rest, okay?” she speaks softly, brows furrowing as her arm slides around his back to get a better grip on the injured male. they’re in a rush, yes, but miyoung doesn’t see a lick of reason in ushering an injured person to move above their current capability. “we don’t have to worry about the soldiers much, they’re out for the count.” the x-men explains, eyes flicking toward the slumped figures on the ground as she angles her foot to kick one of the thigh. no response.

she has never been more thankful for xavier.

“xavier and magneto are taking care of the stronger ones.” miyoung bites her tongue, deciding to nip any distaste in the bud before she says something wrong in front of the brotherhood member. she’d rather be there than here – she’d rather be fighting than doing these things – the weather witch wasn’t going to deny that; even if she knows justly so that she’s doing the right thing in all of this.

“the exit isn’t far—we’ll be there soon.”

[fcxgrey]

changmin doesn’t ask questions. where they’re going, or even why she’s taking the time to rescue him—he doesn’t know, doesn’t care about anything beyond making it the next step. lips parted to draw in rasping breaths, the male watches his feet and forces his head to move; in the haze of pain, his head and limbs register as little more than leaden weights. the hall before them remains nothing but blurs of light and shadow. yet he moves just the same, gaze lowering to watch as she prods a fallen figure with her foot.

some vindictive part of him wishes she’d kick harder—or that they would be awake to experience even a fraction of his pain. but even those thoughts soon wash away, while his fingers twitch at his sides with the mention of battle. he can hear it vaguely—the single thing uncompromised are his senses; as honed as ever—beyond the maze of walls and florescent lights. what hope do any of them have if their leaders are tied up in a battle that none of them could hope to win?

he’d be lying if he said his faith wasn’t shaken; but wasn’t this the perfect time to have a crisis?

it wasn’t as if he’d live to regret it.

the thought leaves him breathless for a moment (though it could just as easily be the gaping hole in his throat), even as he nods with the full knowledge that he’d never be able to tell her if he needed rest. any specifics would be lost in the translation of wheezing breaths and haphazard movements of his head. so he pushes himself, determined to get out of that wretched place just that much faster.

[fcxsoojung]

{ ... } mm? what’s what, oppa? { ` fakes innocent as bright eyes meet his, unable to hold the expression as laugher spills from her lips, shifting her attention back to that little “surprise” setup in favor of taking a decisive step forward, tugging at his hand } you said you hoped for more, didn’t you? { ` she’s amused if anything, taking her time to lead the male there to the tiny little spot—which really consisted of nothing else but floor cushions, a blanket, her laptop, two thermoses, various snacks, a small cake, and a tiny snowman she had take time into making earlier (equipped with heart shaped candies as eyes and buttons and pocky for arms) } it really isn’t much though—but i thought, you know… since the view here is nice we can spend some time here. { ` turns to get a better look at the male, smiling softly as she peers up at him curiously, trying to gauge his reaction } everything that’s not artificially packaged is made by me! i’m not sure what you preferred though so i packed hot chocolate and eggnog—though if you want tea i can get that too, i mean it’s not going to be too hard to make a quick trip to the kitchen. { ` she rambles on a bit, smile turning almost nervous—embarrassed, more like, by her own babble } 

[fcxgrey]

{ ` he shouldn’t have been surprised. but it’s the emotion most prevalent—next to curiosity, wonder and an overwhelming sense of longing—as he listens to her nervous rambling; rambling that leaves him all too tempted to press soft kisses to her lips until her cheeks are pinkened from more than just the chill in the air. instead he scans the setup, taking in the faint, warm light of the christmas lights outside shining in. everything about it screams a message that he’s all too willing to listen to—bask in, in fact—as he tightens his grip around her and allows the tip of his nose to brush against her temple } you’re full of surprises tonight. { ` of course, she always was, but he doesn’t think too deeply on that. his lips curve into a bright smile, eyes just a breath mismatched—the warmth of her body against his is one that he indulges in shamelessly; curling his fingers into the thick fabric of his jacket and lifting her off her feet just slightly. gaze locked on hers, changmin carries her with ease across the space. } it’s plenty for me—the company is most important. { ` it’s more than he could’ve hoped for, even in jest. only upon reaching the edge of the floor cushions does he stop, peering down for a moment before he drops an arm to sweep it beneath her knees, encouraging her legs to bend as he drops to sit with her on his lap. why would he do something like let her go? } hope you don’t mind the seating arrangement. { ` he hums, crossing his legs and reaching for one of the thermoses— } which one is this?

[fcxsoojung]

{ ` she has spent countless times staring at the eyes of shim changmin’s — remembering that shade of brown specifically, every speck in his irises nearly committed to memory; there had even been rare moments, where mismatched eyes greeted her own, admittedly those moments had been her favorite—a reminder that she’s capable of making people like changmin this happy. a direct contrast to the glassy eyes staring back at her now — another sentiment of how jung soojung has failed at preserving the happiness of the people around her } — { ` she doesn’t move when he presses closer, lashes fluttering every so lightly as she winces a bit at the light pressure against bruised skin, giving him a small squeeze of reassurance—to keep close—as her eyes fixate on his, swallowing past the growing lump in her throat at his arm—the absence of the other is heartbreaking enough even without addressing—in favor of moving closer to the tug, heart lurching at the pressure of his lips against hers as she stills for a few heavy seconds before moving, sliding an arm around his neck to both tug him closer and hold him near while her free hand shifts to tug down at the mask—driven by the urge to kiss him, without any barriers, more than anything—lips finding his in a bittersweet kiss that registers as salty when it came down to it as her heart throbs painfully, it wasn’t how she wanted to kiss him; it wasn’t how she wanted their kisses to feel like. heartbreak. helplessness. soojung barely noticed her own tears. }

[fcxgrey]

{ ` he should feel some modicum of shame. or at the very least, guilt for pushing himself so directly into her space -- into her life -- but he's never been the kind. instead, he measures only the amount of comfort that he can receive and give in return. the amount of happiness or love -- and though he has no hope of ever making jung soojung happy, he can love her. he can pour himself into every touch, every kiss and every word -- that he cannot say -- and hope that maybe she understands. the answer to every skip of his heart fails to come as a surprise; not a crashing wave, but an april shower -- one that leaves him all the more wounded for a single fact. this was where they were. this was where they'd always be; fighting to gain some semblance of relief from consuming, heart-wrenching pain. it's the conclusion that leaves him breathless, gripping the back of her shirt as his eyes flutter shut. every squeeze she gives seems to grip his heart itself, the press of her lips serving as an irreversible burn and the salve all at once. he wants this -- he's never wanted anything more; damaged as it is (as they are). changmin presses back, taking relief in the bare contact of their lips even when the taste of salt greets his tongue. he can't wipe her tears away. he can't kiss her cheeks. either would mean releasing his grip or dragging himself away -- instead, he inhales (her air, his) and leans into the kiss, bruised lips moving together with thinly veiled desperation. }

[fcxsoojung]

{ ` it’s not supposed to be this way — soojung knows this well, knows that bumping into the likes of shim changmin almost a year ago—a perfectly long haired, charming man—who had her heart going through palpitations at the merest touch, shouldn’t have to end up like this. though there was none too specific of a change in her feelings toward him that soojung can pinpoint at the moment—rather the change had been in themselves as persons. how fast them—all of them—seemed to fall over the span of a few months was heartbreaking; even if soojung didn’t want to admit it. didn’t want to face it—they’re broken. they’re ruined. } y— { ` she stops mid-word upon setting her eyes on the older male, blinking slowly in shock as her heart twists painfully, lips opening and closing with nothing to say in particular — what can she say? what can she do to make it better for him? — before a small breathless chuckle escapes her, expression doleful as she stubbornly glances up at the ceiling, blinking back tears even as she takes careful steps closer, yearning to offer comfort that she had been keeping from herself—but isn’t it much more worth it to give to others than herself? isn’t the likes of changmin, han, jinri, and everyone else more deserving of comfort than her? haven’t they done more? aren’t they worth more?—as she extends her hands, fingers brushing over scraped skin gingerly before cupping his face } why are you… i… { ` her face contorts slightly, brows furrowing as she struggles to find the right words to express herself, glassy eyes settling on his as her thumbs flick over his cheeks fleetingly, wiping at the tears } i’m really glad you’re here with me. { ` her mind travels back to the beaten and bloody mess of the man who spent the last few months stealing her heart — i’m glad you’re alive. }

[fcxgrey]

{ ` he doesn't like losing control. but if he's honest, he's never had much control over anything -- not even over whether he lived or died -- aside from how lost he can become in a haze of alcohol and indulgences of every other kind. the young woman standing before him is perhaps the best -- the most dangerous of them all; his fingers itch at the first touch. a nearly physical ache to hold her takes him by anything but surprise even as he tries to reign himself in. he sniffs quietly, watching her expression behind a blurry film that only distorts further. how could she be glad? though perhaps he shouldn't have been surprised. she'd always been kind to him. always in a way that bordered on loving but never quite reached in name. } ... { ` changmin takes a step closer, leaning down and forward just enough to press their foreheads together. with the rest of her face obscured, he has little else to focus on aside from her eyes -- and he maintains her gaze, hesitant in the face of the fact that he wouldn't be able to wrap himself around her like he wanted (like she needed). the glaring absence at his other side leaves him hurt; distraught for the wound that won't heal as he slips his only arm around her waist and tugs, pressing his lips to the thin paper layer of her mask as tears continue to slip down his cheeks. }

[chibisuz]

[fcxsoojung]

{ ` she could do nothing but stare for the longest moment, taking in every bit of detail of the male before her — the fatigue in his eyes and the guilt in his expression are among the few things she picks up along with scraped skin and bruises similar to her own — there is a bit of relief that follows, he’s alive but nontheless, no different from when she last saw him, head at the mercy of another’s grip } — { ` she shrinks into herself slightly at the thought of it, hesitant eyes lowering to his lips as she pauses at the words mouthed towards her, brows furrowing even as her heart tightens in response — why is he sorry? shouldn’t she be sorry? } why…are you apologizing? { ` holds his gaze for a moment before her eyes lower, fixating on her shoes for the time being as she takes a breath } it’s not—none of this is your fault.

[fcxgrey]

{ ` logic says she's right; that there's little that he could've known or done -- he couldn't have fought any harder, couldn't have prevented the wounds scattering her face or even his sister's broken body. but everything else; every solitary thought that enters his mind says differently. he has little else to do but think when reality greets him -- just upon opening his eyes -- morning, noon and night. he's no stranger to the heartache, or the guilt that follows but for the first time, it's raw -- too close and too real for him to take solace in any vice. her question merely sends his heart clenching; his throat aching as he watches the curiosity enter her eyes. his mind is quick to fill in the blanks; times and places -- it'd already been almost a year -- and every word that'd followed whenever jung soojung was curious, and the thought brings a vague smile to his lips, even as the wet warmth of tears overflows the moment her attention turns downward. his fingers curl at his side, lower lip trembling -- he can't answer her; can't imagine how he couldn't be sorry for any of this. }

[thetokintoken]

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[fcxgrey]

"If you love me, won’t you let me know?" 

[fcxsoojung]

{ ` she watches afar for a long minute, unable to find any way or reason to approach before she decidedly just steps forward, fingers grasping the edge of her mask and tugging it up further before dropping limply — fiddling with her fingers absently as she approaches him slowly, clearing her throat a bit as her eyes flick up over his face before lowering } hi.

[fcxgrey]

{ ` for once, he doesn't have to worry about not knowing what to say; the irony doesn't escape him, but nor do the minute darkening of the skin at her temple -- or the hesitation with which she seems to approach, after far too many minutes spent hovering at his periphery. but he can hardly blame her; can do little but dip his head in vague shame. he'd been wrong -- the last time he'd seen the likes of jung soojung, he'd smiled; assured without words that everything would be alright. it'd all turned out to be lies. } ... { ` it's as he scans her face that he feels it -- the clenching in his chest and the sting of bitterness in his eyes } 'i'm sorry.' { ` he mouths the words, eyes fixed on hers }

[fcxgrey]

... { ` watches his surroundings silently, for the millionth time lamenting his inability to speak }

[tohososhi]

[fcxtempest]

— titanium .

[fcxtempest]

                  { ♛— ; } relief.

miyoung can’t seem to express in words the amount of it that hits her in waves—with no small amount of pity following up at the end. he looks impossibly hurt. “thank god.” she breathes out, eyes flicking over swollen and bloodied features. miyoung doesn’t recognize him—logically can’t place him as a member of the school—but that didn’t matter as far as she cared. the differences in their beliefs doesn’t change a thing when it comes to this mission – when it comes to the fact that he was among the few who gave their lives to retrieve the desecrated head of an innocent sixteen year old.

shifting carefully, her eyes never leaves the male’s as her hand slides behind gingerly to cradle the back of his head, slipping her other arm around his shoulders as she slowly lifts him up. “careful.” she murmurs, voice soft and reassuring, if anything, as her lips twist into a smile, “it’s okay—i got you.” the last thing she’d want is for him to freak, though a cursory glance over his wounds once more has her almost pausing, “you don’t have to answer me—just blink once for yes and twice for no okay?”

that’s the best method she could come up with, at least. it wasn’t like she could ask xavier to set up some sort of mind link at a time like this.

cautiously, the x-men moves a bit closer as she takes care to lift him up from the ground, taking another glance over of the damage done to his body before settling on his eyes again, blinking. “are your legs okay? can you walk? we have a van waiting outside and once we get everyone out we’ll be taking you guys back to brotherhood.” she figures, at a time like this, to explain things a bit more clearly—so they know—would be a more appreciative gesture, maybe.

“you’ll be okay.” the woman adds on with a smile, the apples of her cheeks rising as her eyes curve into crescents, hand rubbing at his back lightly—encouraging, if anything. “c’mon, you can lean against me—don’t be shy.” she injects a bit of a tease into her words, hoping to draw out a bit more normalcy, really.

[fcxgrey]

everything hurts. there’s no amount of sound that can fully express how much even the slightest move has him reeling, jaw slack as the next breath hangs in his throat. changmin forces it out, just as he tries to force the rest of his body to cooperate and it responds like a dying light bulb—flickering to life just enough to get him through the next step before giving way to darkness. silently, he considers her words as best he can, gaze returning to her face while his brows furrow.

he can hardly see straight, let alone stand and maintain his balance, but it’s unreasonable to expect this woman to carry him out.

after a few audible wheezes—given while he tries to accelerate his healing rate just a little—changmin blinks (once. twice.) and follows the pressure of her lifting upward. there’s no option. just as there was no option to lie down during magneto’s harsher training sessions; he couldn’t do so unless he was prepared to be rendered unconscious by a chunk of metal the size of his head. and he doesn’t consider it. his fingers curl tightly around her wrist, gaining some purchase there as the male drags his legs underneath him and pushes himself to his feet.

the effort brings blood pouring down; soaking through the fabric of his makeshift bindings.

his head swims.

once they get everyone out. everyone was waiting on him—and there was no way in hell he’d get away with being a martyr for their sake. even swaying, he pushes himself into his next step. he spares his rescuer a glance, taking a little comfort in the smile she offers him, as if he isn’t falling apart at the seams. changmin leans his weight into her, hooking his fingertips into the hem of her shirt and squeezing until his knuckles turn white.

god, it hurts.