destructive love is all i am;

hwang miyoung, twenty-three, mimicry, room 703 ❖ les yeux sont aveugles, il faut chercher avec le coeur

[fcxmiyoung]

unfollow, unfollow!

I REVAMPED THIS BLIND BITCH AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[thessulvatores-blog]

[fcxmiyoung]

Girl Idol body porn: SNSD’s Tiffany 

[fcxmiyoung]

REVAMP COMING UP !

miyoung is going to be revamped so keep an eye out for it!

[fcxmiyoung]

cries my baby needs plots pls like for an full frontal frisking in the inbox ~~

[harrukimurrakami]

I am trying to remember you, and let you go at the same time.

nayyirah waheed  (via piaopew)

[patinini]

soft skin, red lips, so kissable

[fcxmiyoung]

✖ — you set my soul alight .

how long before you let me go?

it's perhaps not the best idea for her to loiter around the indoor pool--with everything considered soojoo unnie would have greatly reprimanded herself for it--but as the older woman had busied herself with doing whatever it was that experts did, miyoung found herself with too much free time and no one to share or dictate what she should do with it.

it is by chance that she found herself pushing past the doors to the indoor pool -- exposing herself to the strong stench of chlorine that floods her senses, overwhelmingly so, but to the point that she--strangely enough--was hungry.

honestly, she should probably get that checked.

still, miyoung moves forward, mentally counting the steps to the edge as her hand lifts to unbutton the dress (at least it felt like one) she had picked out, for the very first time, for herself that morning. it hadn't taken long for her to strip down completely, bare as she had came into the world and--had this actually been a means to an end rather than a self indulgence--miyoung supposed she would probably be bare when she leaves it too.

but the details for that story was for another time.

with some careful feeling groping, the woman no sooner finds herself sitting on the edge of the pool, shifting her legs to dip in what she imagined to be crystalline water as she hums quietly to herself, body relaxing with every exhale as her mind gradually wanders back into the safe haven she had created for herself.

and she imagines reliving the peaceful days in the studio apartment for two, the smell of paint and food (homecooked food) lingering in the air -- it seduces her, fools her for a second as the woman simply leans forward, lips parted slightly as she inhaled deeply and relaxed her entire body; allowing gravity to do its job and drag her into the pool.

[fcxmiyoung]

✖ — no space among the clouds .

there's no salvation for me now

among the injured students, miyoung was of the more lucky few who didn't sustain any particularly life-threatening injuries, save broken fingers and darkening blotches of skin scattered all over pale skin -- her body ached, yes, protested with every step she took but till the very end, there really wasn't much that required her to stay in the infirmary for too long.

all the better, seeing as the room was already more than over the hosting capacity.

and so the blind woman found herself wandering (almost) aimlessly through the campus, one hand attached to the wall in an attempt to lead her to the right direction (miyoung--as per usual--remembered every detail, every pattern in the walls) -- to the kitchen, of which were she might find herself a cold bottle of soju in the third cabinet behind a trick wall.

assuming magneto hadn't moved his collection, that is.

she may not require medication -- but preferably, miyoung would rather not have to endure any of this sober.

[iirenebae]

[fcxmiyoung]

You’re truly brighter than gems 

[fcxmiyoung]

✖ — sweet melody sung by two .

[fcxsoojoo]

( * the hands on soojoo’s watch tick away faintly as she brings her wrist around to check the time — half past eight, which meant she was running a tad late today. she steps onto her bed to cross her room while avoiding the mess of clothes and towels that litter the floor. the chaos is perpetual despite cleaning everything daily. it’s become quite a job for her every night before bed — picking out an outfit and figuring out complimentary makeup for both herself and miyoung. but it was something she looked forward to, always. before she leaves the apartment, garment bag slung over her shoulder and travel mug full of steaming tea tucked away in her purse, she checks the current weather on her phone )

parfait.

( * a small hand curled up into a tiny fist knocks on the door of room 703. today was an especially eventful day because of the winter festival. soojoo had picked out the perfect outfit for miyoung and she could barely contain her excitement; the gentle smile on her lips gave no indication though as she waited for the other to open the door )

[fcxmiyoung]

「— silence was all that met her upon exiting the tiny bathroom attached to her single (at the moment) dorm, it made her nervous--if miyoung was honest--although anything regarding soojoo not being around always did set her off a bit. after (however short it may be) years of living together, turning to find herself alone with no one but her and her imagination in quite the spacious room (at least miyoung imagined) was a tad bit disconcerting. she half loved and hated it -- but in the end it was obvious, at least to herself, that it wasn't the slightest bit healthy for her to be alone with her thoughts for too long 」

「—  moving around absently, the woman snaps to attention at the knock, a bright smile dancing along dainty features as she moved toward the door with ease (having gotten used to where things were in her room of two years there, there wasn't a thing she couldn't pull out and identify to someone), reaching forth for the door knob before her fingers curl around the metal, twisting it slightly and pulling back to reveal the woman she had been waiting for 」

unnie! good morning!

[a-thousand-words]

In time, in time they tell me, I’ll not feel so bad. I don’t want time to heal me. There’s a reason I’m like this. I want time to set me ugly and knotted with loss of you, marking me. I won’t smooth you away. I can’t say goodbye.

China Miéville, The Scar 

[misspark]

Visit Original Link

[fcxmiyoung]

love is, my love is, my love is gone

[heylululu-blog]

[fcxmiyoung]

{` ringing silence was easily broken by a scream from the crowd — just like that complete and utter chaos breaks out, people running from all sorts of directions in order to get away from the stage — though none of that matters when everything on the stage promptly explodes, debris shooting in all sorts of directions and over the screams and rushed footsteps of everyone trying to get as far away as possible — a laugh is to be heard; a declaration of a war on all of busan has begun }

「— it had been such a pretty festival prior, miyoung couldn't fully understand how quickly things has fallen given both position she was in and the disadvantage she had regarding her sight. a block or two from the stage, she remains blind to events going on as she clutches the small bag of curry dukbokki in her hands, intent on delivering them to her unnie in apology for leaving earlier -- soojoo would forgive her right? 」

「— though soon it was hard to deny the change in the air, the blanket of tension that covered the night air as the people around her turned back to look toward the direction of the stage, curious to see what was going on -- miyoung too, would have turned, had she not been taken completely off guard by the first foot that sinks into her calf, knocking the woman off balance immediately and onto the asphalt with a small cry of pain escaping her 」

「— what happened? 」

「— miyoung doesn't get the luxury of an answer, rather a few rogue kicks to her lower back is the only response she gets -- it was on instinct that she moves, pointedly curling up as she clasps both hands at the back of her neck, chin tucked into her chest; she doesn't bother to try and get up, because experience states that she would be kicked down immediately given the mass amount of people heading her way--many of which didn't care about how many others was being trampled--and whereas this wasn't the best sort of move on her behalf, but it was the only defensive move she could think of at the time. miyoung has been beaten like this enough times to figure out what's more important in protecting -- all it matters is that she lives through whatever this is right? 」

「— she only hoped the same for soojoo 」

[fcxmiyoung]

✖ — once in a while .

you are in my dreams

「— the festival was larger than she had originally thought, though miyoung remained quite calm for someone who had lost her unnie in the crowd. it shouldn't matter too much right? they were going to find each other eventually, that much miyoung had faith in. and so until then, the woman found herself wandering aimlessly through the crowd, humming a light tune despite the rowdy group of teens (or so she assumed, given the occasional crack in their voices when a few of them got too excited) she was trying to pass through -- though even that attempt all but stops at the brush another's shoulder against hers in passing, leaving nothing but fading warmth and a lingering scent that overpowers her other senses and leaves her mind blank for a moment -- a cologne that leaves her absolutely breathless, be it from the weight sinking in her chest or the butterflies fluttering in the pits of her stomach, it wasn't something she could easily shake off; not when she knew, just by that who the person was -- how could she forget? 」

「— it is perhaps a cruel twist of fate--had soojoo been here to see it, the older woman would have claimed it was her destiny, theirs, at work (though even then, she wasn't quite sure that her unnie would approve of this -- after all didn't she waste enough days struggling to piece together broken pieces of herself already?)--for him to be here. here, out of all places, within close vicinity of her as well. all it would take was a few steps to reach him, wouldn't it? yes. there was no glass wall keeping them apart now, yet miyoung feels as if the distance has only increased throughout the years 」

「— even without that, however, she's afraid--afraid of what reuniting with an ex-lover would mean for her -- if anything at all. would she break? would it hurt? the answer was a definite yes even without her having to ponder much about it. kwon jiyong was imprinted onto her very bones, there was just no way she could easily shake him off. there was no way she would ever want to 」

「— she had always been a complete fool when it came to matters of the heart  」

「— it is with that self-deprecating thought that she takes a couple steps forward, not exactly sure in the direction he had gone off in (or if he was still around) yet all the same miyoung is compelled to try, expression slightly stricken as she struggles to decipher his scent from the mass of people 」

jiyong--

「—  where are you? 」

[fcxgrey]

“we have changed—” ♕

but we're still the same . . .

{` the call of various food stand vendors and the scent of frying chicken is what draws Changmin from his self-imposed exile in the small, forgotten park down the street. Flesh, bone and gauze, he makes his way down the crowded streets with an unlit cigarette propped between his lips and a limp to his step. } sorry.

{` upon taking a single glance toward his knees, he meets the eyes of the little girl staring up at him and hums a soft apology. the bandage over his left eye has him struggling to reestablish his depth perception but he ultimately gives it up and settles for quiet lament as he bumps into the other festival goers with a smile that only reveals a single half of his mismatched eyes. }

{` the child says nothing, only darting away to hide beneath her mother’s skirt. Some things will never change, he muses to himself—though that train of thought soon fades as he finds himself a seat at a nearby stand and lifts a hand to rub his eyes before plucking the nicotine stick from his mouth. } what do you have?

[fcxmiyoung]

「— she wasn't supposed to leave unnie's side, that was the only promise made to the older woman upon heading into the city. and although miyoung knew fully well that it was for her own good (she had issues navigating through busan on a good day -- much less a day packed with people like today) she simply couldn't resist the temptation in the air, the strong scent of kimchi fried rice setting off small flips in her stomach 」

food.

「— it slips from her lips as her lips quirk, making a quick decision--a promise to herself really--to be back before the older woman was finished making her purchase from one of the stands. this would only take a second right? 」

「— with that thought in mind, the intermediate mutant was on the move, steadily counting the number of steps taken in her head as she followed the scent of food, using her stick to aid her in navigating around until a small push from behind--an elbow, miyoung guesses, given the sharpness digging into her lower back--nudges her forward as she takes a stumble forward, releasing a small gasp as her hands reached out on reflex to grab the nearest thing for balance, fingers curling into what seems to be soft fabric. the firmness of her last minute support registers as a person, yet miyoung sees nothing -- she always sees nothing; still, she smiles, pink lips tugging back to reveal a somewhat sheepish expression 」

sorry...

「— the woman trails off as realization hits her, lips parted slightly and brows furrowing  -- drat, she lost count 」

[fcxmiyoung]

sent out a bunch of plotting msgs! i can't reblog myself on mobile so ill repost~ please like this if you want to plot!