Fear and Loathing

the blog of Lorcan Blackwood he/him/his

[torstherapy]

[fearandloathingsblog]

The whole only one day off this week thing is really starting to chap my ass.

[pnglove]

[fearandloathingsblog]

Day 1 on T

Day 2 on T

Yesterday. My life began yesterday.

I would have posted then announcing this new beginning only I managed to pull a muscle looking down (can't make this shit up), and I needed to go immediately to sleep after work. Pain has that effect on me. Today is better.

I'm already feeling better.

The weight of trying to live a lie has begun to roll off my fatigued shoulders, and for the first time in my long life, I am beginning to see the outline of who I was born to be and the life I was born to live.

I think I might be happy.

[insuvi]

Ceremonial dagger with sculpted reaper hilt, mid 1800's, Italy

[treefey]

"I want my media to be historically accurate"

Cool, so you want natural fiber costumes with no/nuanced corset slander, people wearing colors, historical hairstyles, people wearing hats or headcoverings and long sleeves outside during the day, no potatoes or pumpkins in pre-columbian Europe, actors with textured skin and wrinkles, minimal makeup, consulting HEMA groups and weapons scholars for all the weapons and fight scenes, a good soundtrack that includes traditional instruments?

Oh, you mean you want 100% white people. Even in crowd scenes in port cities. There's a different word for that.

[himekokosu]

Phaphiopedilum liemianum 

[herpsandbirds]

Butterbur weevil / liparus glabrirostris (probably). Encountered at around 1400m elevation in the mountains of Nationalpark Berchtesgaden, Germany. This fellow was sitting in the middle of a path so I moved it after taking a few pictures.

[fearandloathingsblog]

I'm working on a fimo chess set and I think I just found my bishop

[cryptic-forge]

i got inspired by antique furniture -> decided to try and make a wooden doll.

she is whittled entirely out of balsa wood with a craft knife, and colored with wood dye. the cabinet has miniature hinges made of tube beads and a metal rod, and closes with a magnet. she absolutely should hold a sentimental & important object, but i don't have any that are the correct size, so i just put in some cute trinkets.

[oliverr-gardenn]

fuck hussle culture, the toad to success is to sleep well, eat well and have fun

[oliverr-gardenn]

i meant road. road to success

[jellycreature]

Reblog the Toad of Success to sleep well, eat well, and have fun

[fearandloathingsblog]

I'm here for a good time not a long time.

[guelwaar]

clinical medicine is simple, basically the way it works is 99.999% of doctors don't know anything at all, so they only treat the 10–15 most common problems in their specialty. this might sound bad, but actually it's better, because 99.999% of patients don't have any complex medical problems anyway, which we know because they've never been diagnosed with anything except the 10–15 most common problems in the relevant specialty, because in order to be evaluated for something else they would have to be referred to one of the 0.001% of doctors who occasionally know something about some other condition, but they can't get that referral because they obviously don't need it because they've only been diagnosed with simple problems that the other 99.999% of doctors evaluate. so as U can see it's really about ensuring every patient gets the best possible care.

[papercranesandpride]

I remember years ago, long enough ago that I was still using either Tiktok or Instagram regularly, because that's where I saw this, long enough ago that unfortunately I do not remember the username, I saw an older trans woman responding to a comment asking "how come we see trans women from your generation, but never trans men?" And her response was simple. "Unfortunately, it's because most of them are dead." Between lack of safe and legal abortions (which, hey, look what's an issue again), the HIV/AIDs crisis (which still is lacking in approved treatments for trans men, and they're still likely to be denied PrEP/PEP even when they should be eligible as sexually active queer men), and how many of them chose to take their own lives after being forced into marriages and other women's roles, a lot of the trans men that should be elderly right now did not make it.

And now, when I find myself making the mistake of going on Instagram, I get to see trans men themselves talking about how historically, trans men didn't do anything for the community, and so we need to step up now. Which, first of all, that isn't true, but second of all, if trans men's contributions are lesser, that makes a lot of sense if we listen to that trans woman talking about the trans men she was in community with back in the day. It's very hard to advance the trans cause if you're not alive.

Anyway. It's a really chilling answer. "Where are all the elderly trans men?" "They're dead." And I just wish more people saw that tiktok and listened to it and really took it to heart, now that we're in the age of "well obviously trans men have it so much easier."

[this-is-trans-joy]

Pray for the Black trans man I started following on Instagram who dared bring up misandry as a force of oppression against trans men and has now spent the last few days fighting for his life against white cis people in the comment section patronising the shit out of him with “misandry isn’t real hope this helps 💕💞💕💞” as if a Black trans man doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about.

(@/intelly.geek is his username if you wanna show him some love btw, and for that matter another trans man on Instagram named @/thrandyv is going through the exact same thing right now so go follow some trans men who are putting in the work to say the shit that most trans creators on Instagram and TikTok aren’t willing to talk about).

[fearandloathingsblog]

Ya boy finally found a queer barber 😀

[anarchist-art]

[cadaverer]

absolutely insane that you can talk about how parents will underfeed their "daughters" and give them clothes that are harder to move in and restrict their freedom in a way they don't for their "sons" and everyone will nod along until you bring up transmascs, at which point we've all got to pretend that actually the things that happen to you when youre a child don't have ramifications down the line and transmascs should just get over it. man up, even.

[fearandloathingsblog]

Progress made on my Memento Mori piece.