let’s talk about female exclusivity!

Positivity, advice, and education blog for female-exclusive bisexual women, also known as febfems! I mainly post bisexual and WLW positivity. Not a discourse blog - discourse asks will be deleted.

[bonae-artes-liberales]

This year, on the 31 March, we lost Gilbert Baker, gay artist and creator of the gay pride flag. Today we would celebrate his 66th birthday. Let’s remember him as the wonderful person he was.

[piranya]

i just want to add to this post that the last update made to the official pride flag by Glibert Baker before he passed away was THIS:

the new lavender stripe at the very top was added to represent DIVERSITY and as far as i am aware, was added in retaliation against trump’s presidency. i’ve not seen many people use this version, and it deserves to be known.

[febfems]

happy pride month to all febfems 💗💜💙

i wish for all febfems to take pride in their bisexuality, their love for women, and their prioritization of that love.

i wish for all febfems to find strength in the face of the hate we receive from all sides—those who say it’s inevitable we will end up with a man, as if we are not the makers of our own destinies, those who say we’re denying our sexuality, or self hating, or that we ourselves are hateful to others.

to that, i say: there is nothing hateful about being bisexual and being female exclusive. there is nothing hateful or wrong or deviant about being same sex attracted and wanting to act on that attraction, to celebrate it, to let it shine through you and make the world around you that much brighter. to me, there is nothing more beautiful than same sex love. and the fact that we, as febfems, actively pursue this love when all the odds are stacked against us, makes us immensely powerful.

i am inspired by our community and the women in it every day, no matter how small it may be right now. we will make our voices heard. we will make our mark on history. we will find each other, and we will grow together, and so will our sisterhood.

to all febfems during pride month: you have much to be proud of 🌈

[sapphos-darlings]

Being a woman who loves and desires other women doesn't make you less of a woman.

Loving women is not "masculine". Desiring women is not "masculine". Heterosexual attraction is not some requirement or a "normal" thing so called real women have to have.

Same-sex attraction is a normal experience, natural to all sorts of women from all around the world, from all walks of life.

There's no one right way to exist as a woman. Being same-sex attractes is just one more shade of infinite diversity among us.

[badfem-deactivated20130829]

[35000ft-deactivated20180102]

This is stunning.

[auslanddd]

Ill always be a sap and reblog this

[sapphos-darlings]

Here’s a thought: Simply knowing that you’re a woman who loves other women could be enough.

If you feel undecided, confused, uncertain or anxious about labels, not picking one is an option.

Not finding an accurate label or not identifying with any specific label doesn’t mean you’re less welcome in WLW spaces or the LGBT commuity. It doesn’t mean you’re lacking, a work in progress, or lost. You can just love other women and focus on that.

Whatever you call yourself wouldn’t change who you are in any case. You’re already whole and you can figure out your feelings, wants and desires on person by person basis as life goes on. Maybe it’s something new with every new person, maybe you can’t imagine how you’ll feel in new situations, maybe you’re not very experienced, and that is all okay.

Knowing that you’re not straight can be enough. Knowing that you like other women can be enough.

You’re your own person, you choose how you describe yourself, and you don’t need to tick a specific box or show identification in order to love other women.

Simply be yourself. That is enough.

[tomcats-and-tophats]

Origin of the Bi Crescent Symbol

You may have seen this symbol around now and then as a symbol of bisexual pride. Have you ever wondered where it came from, though? Well, I did too - and what I could find was fascinating!

Much of this information was translated from German by @fallaciousfeline​, thank you again!

The Bi Crescents originated as the logo for the German Bisexual Network, BiNe e.V, which was established in 1992. (I have found sources stating both 1992 and 1998 as the years in which the crescents were adopted)

It was originally designed by Vivian Wagner, and utilized the colours of the Gay Pride flag. Of this, Vivian said, “The rainbow colours of the crescents are intended that way. This is about solidarity with those that have HIV, and those that are afflicted by AIDS. It also serves as a symbol of our belongingness to the lesbian-bi-gay community.’”

The design itself comes from the interlinking of the Mars and Venus symbols, removal of the gender signifiers, and leaving them “open”:

Another goal of  the design was to avoid the holocaust imagery found in the more common “biangle” and other triangular symbols associated with the LGBT community.

In more recent years, the symbol was redesigned utilizing the colours of Michael Page’s bisexual pride flag.

One interpretation of the “moon” like symbols that I’m extremely fond of is the idea that, like the moon, no matter what part you may be perceiving at one time, you’re still seeing part of something strong and whole.

Sources under cut!

Keep reading

[our-bi-space]

I empathize with every single bi girl who lies awake at night wondering if her parents would still love her if they knew. Every single bi girl that has felt a mixture of nausea and excitement after her first kiss with a girl. Every single bi girl who struggled with acknowledging her feelings and wished she were normal. Every single bi girl who swore up and down that she was gay and then found out she wasn't. Every single bi girl who has hated herself for who she is, for who she loves, and for what she wants. You will come out the other side, full of life and laughter and love, and be embraced by your community. We know you and we love you. We're here.

[brownsunbisexual-permarchive-de]

being bisexual does not enable me to “choose men” or leave room for them in my life; being bisexual, in actuality, gives me the option to choose women time and time again, and it is the reason i can love women. 

[woman-loving]

I saw your post earlier and it got me thinking about how desire is left out of that characterization of bi women. (That we’ll ditch women for men once the going gets rough; that we aren’t fully invested in relationships with women or combating homophobia, because we aren’t “forced” to deal with them through lack of “options.”) 

It doesn’t take into account the simple fact that… sometimes bi women fall in love with women! Sometimes a woman is who we desire. Instead, it assumes that bi women’s relationships are driven by ease rather than desire for a specific individual. It assumes all individuals are interchangeable: if we love A but being with her is difficult, it’s emotionally feasibly–and rational–to simply transfer our love to a more socially acceptable candidate (who will of course immediately reciprocate our feelings). But desire and love aren’t simply determined by the path of least resistance. 

Anyway, now I’m reading and this quote spoke to exactly what I was thinking: “Desire, the energy that [Audre] Lorde names as “the erotic,” is incredibly powerful–powerful enough to lead people to behavior that might result in consequences ranging from ostracization to violence. It is important to attend to desire because too often sex is examined as though no feelings are involved.“ (Rosamond S. King, “Island Bodies: Transgressive Sexualities in the Caribbean Imagination,” 2014)

[watermelinoe]

i love bi women i love being bi i love being a febfem

[violetdanger]

Bi women need more support wrt our attraction to women. We need more reassurance and acceptance when we interact with women sexually and/or romantically whether it be through hook ups or dating or relationships or even just figuring out if what our attraction to women looks like.

Pushing the (biphobic) idea that bi women are just ~gay when it’s easy~ and straight when things get hard really puts a feeling of futility and inevitability on the End of our relationship with women and we may not even have yet.

Bi women deserve to explore their attraction to women, to date women, to marry women with out biphobes popping in every 20 minutes Reminding us that we’re all meant to be with men “in the end” anyway.

[sapphos-darlings]

Bisexual women deserve to prioritize their love for other women

Bisexual women can choose to look for other women, to choose only other women, to want women more, and to want to be only in same-sex relationships.

Bisexual woman's love and desire for other women is not lesser, flimsier or weaker than her attraction to the opposite sex. Love between women is just as good, just as real and just as strong!

Bisexual women who prefer women are real and deserve to be heard, seen and supported!

There is a future for women with other women. All woman-loving women deserve it!

[bidotorg]

Wishing our favorite flag the happiest of birthdays! 💖💜💙

[sapphos-darlings]

Lesbians and bi women, don't let loneliness make you give up your standards for a partner!

Don't trade away your dignity, goals, happiness or values!

So many of us live between a rock and a hard place, where other woman-loving women are hard to find, and where people such as friends, peers, family, communities and our very culture push impossible expectations and homophobia on us and how we live our lives.

It can be very tempting to take a chance when it happens once every blue moon.

It can be tempting to shrink down and protect yourself against pressure and vile homophobic hate.

But all of us deserve to have partners we love and who love us back. Who are attractive, share our values and respect and accept us as we truly are.

Every lesbian and bi woman deserves to want and keep openly searching love and sex! Every lesbian and bi woman deserves to hold their potential partners up to the standards they set!

You deserve to desire sex and have your libido matched. You deserve to want long-term commitment and love. You deserve to want or not want kids. You deserve to prefer non-smokers, blondes, butches, femmes, vegans, women with athletic lifestyle, Virgos, party girls, steadily employed women who own a car, dog lovers, followers of the same religion, anime nerds, tall women, etc.

Happiness is possible and no woman should ever settle out of fear or shame.

[lesbian-archives]

Clara Balzary, 2017

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

Source: Women Together; Portraits of Love, Commitment, and Life - Essays by Mona Holmlund , Photography by Cyndy Warwick

[wlwvintage]

A note from 1925 which reads:

‘‘There is no faith in a man, 

not even in a brother,

so girls if you must love

Love one another.’’

[wlwvintage]

Amidst a crowd on Market Street, one woman embraces another from behind as they watch the International Lesbian & Gay Freedom Day Parade, San Francisco, California, June 25th 1989 by Bromberg Hoover.