Day 77 - ???: January 11 - March 23
Hello out there! Happy Spring to those in the Northern Hemisphere! Today doesn’t quite feel like things are thawing just yet. Well, nothing ever really freezes here, at least physically, but you get me, right? There was freezing rain this morning, and most of the day has been windy and moody. I’m in a slightly gloomy state, so it fits nicely. I know it won’t last, the grey in the sky and in my mind.
Winter continued onward in January. I made new friends via Q.E. F.J. and H.G. Both women. F.J. is Italian and lives here at least half the year with her husband and baby, and H.G. is Irish and lives here most of the time. They’re both great. We all went for a walk together a couple of weeks ago, and I felt instantly at ease with both of them. No pretension, no internal tension, just vibes. Haha… Q.E. and I ended up at Livadi, and she asked me if I wanted to swim. I hadn’t planned on it, but the weather was good. That was my last swim! Of that month, maybe…But since I’ve been a few more times throughout February and March. It feels amazing each time and like I’ve accomplished something, even though it’s just cold water.
Another day, the four of us met at H.G.’s wonderful home. F.J. made Tiramisu. We ate it along with tea and coffee. It felt so good to commiserate with a group of women. That’s something I’m missing these days. I’m so fortunate in many ways. My life is simple. I wake up, do my morning things like drink hot water with lemon and meditate and journal… Attempt to do some work. Z.X. usually comes home in the afternoon and we eat something. He usually sleeps, I find it difficult to unwind in the middle of the day. More work, maybe a walk or some exercise, getting distracted by various phenomena on the rectangle (my euphemism for my phone), maybe more food, probably watching something together on Netflix or if the signal is working, something on good ol’ fashioned TV. Back in February we had a nice group dinner with Q.E. and her husband, H.G. and her partner, and me and Z.X. Another situation that felt comfortable and heart-warming and necessary. Z.X. and I go to sleep so early that we didn’t last as long as we could have, but I’m pretty sure we made it past midnight.
Now that we’re firmly implanted in 2021, it seems like everyone asks me “What are you doing this summer?” I barely know the answer… Does anyone, on an existential level? I don’t really want to talk about it, but it seems bleak and naive to view the v as a panacea for everything going on right now. It’s so much more complex than that but at the same time it could all be so simple. Remembering that we’re humans not machines, that we all need love and to express ourselves and to move around as we please and to have our needs taken care of and more…
On a practical level, it looks like I will live with Z.X. We basically already do anyway. Whenever I’m not entirely convinced about a decision or situation, I tell myself it’ll be a good story, at the very least. I’m looking forward to seeing what summer has in store, because I’m not entirely sure. Yes, I will do my esoteric things and write, but I could use something guaranteed to be fairly substantial. Someone tentatively offered me a job at a Taverna on the beach. It’s an interesting proposition. I couldn’t ever see myself working in the service industry in let’s say, North America, where you’re expected to be fast and chipper and overly apologetic, but I’ve experienced the vibe at restaurants here, and no one’s in a rush. Which is the way it should be, especially if you’re coming to visit a tiny Greek island to escape from the big city or whatever. So much of me is praying that this summer will be as magical as the last. Falling in love with this place, things flowing nicely. Feeling fulfilled and healthy. Being able to travel to places I’ve never been before...Realizing it was possible to live by the sea, feeling hopeful, feeling reassured that things will work out. They always do, in their own way. For some reason I’m thinking of the intestines of the human body with all of their complicated folds, and nooks, and crannies. We eat something, and it eventually gets down there, sometimes after a long and complicated journey, sometimes it just passes right through us. And whether it’s something we shouldn’t have ingested or something incredibly delicious and good for us, it’ll all come out somehow and be okay. Or we die if it’s poison…Haha.. I’m not sure where I’m going with this...
Wherever you are, I hope that you are digesting life to the fullest given the circumstances!
Sending love and all that good stuff your way.








