Winter and beyond on a Greek Island...

Updates from me, a weirdo, living in Folegandros, Cyclades, Greece

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 77 - ???: January 11 - March 23

Hello out there! Happy Spring to those in the Northern Hemisphere! Today doesn’t quite feel like things are thawing just yet. Well, nothing ever really freezes here, at least physically, but you get me, right? There was freezing rain this morning, and most of the day has been windy and moody. I’m in a slightly gloomy state, so it fits nicely. I know it won’t last, the grey in the sky and in my mind.

Winter continued onward in January. I made new friends via Q.E. F.J. and H.G. Both women. F.J. is Italian and lives here at least half the year with her husband and baby, and H.G. is Irish and lives here most of the time. They’re both great. We all went for a walk together a couple of weeks ago, and I felt instantly at ease with both of them. No pretension, no internal tension, just vibes. Haha… Q.E. and I ended up at Livadi, and she asked me if I wanted to swim. I hadn’t planned on it, but the weather was good. That was my last swim! Of that month, maybe…But since I’ve been a few more times throughout February and March. It feels amazing each time and like I’ve accomplished something, even though it’s just cold water.

Another day, the four of us met at H.G.’s wonderful home. F.J. made Tiramisu. We ate it along with tea and coffee. It felt so good to commiserate with a group of women. That’s something I’m missing these days. I’m so fortunate in many ways. My life is simple. I wake up, do my morning things like drink hot water with lemon and meditate and journal… Attempt to do some work. Z.X. usually comes home in the afternoon and we eat something. He usually sleeps, I find it difficult to unwind in the middle of the day. More work, maybe a walk or some exercise, getting distracted by various phenomena on the rectangle (my euphemism for my phone), maybe more food, probably watching something together on Netflix or if the signal is working, something on good ol’ fashioned TV.  Back in February we had a nice group dinner with Q.E. and her husband, H.G. and her partner, and me and Z.X. Another situation that felt comfortable and heart-warming and necessary. Z.X. and I go to sleep so early that we didn’t last as long as we could have, but I’m pretty sure we made it past midnight. 

Now that we’re firmly implanted in 2021, it seems like everyone asks me “What are you doing this summer?” I barely know the answer… Does anyone, on an existential level? I don’t really want to talk about it, but it seems bleak and naive to view the v as a panacea for everything going on right now. It’s so much more complex than that but at the same time it could all be so simple. Remembering that we’re humans not machines, that we all need love and to express ourselves and to move around as we please and to have our needs taken care of and more…

On a practical level, it looks like I will live with Z.X. We basically already do anyway. Whenever I’m not entirely convinced about a decision or situation, I tell myself it’ll be a good story, at the very least. I’m looking forward to seeing what summer has in store, because I’m not entirely sure. Yes, I will do my esoteric things and write, but I could use something guaranteed to be fairly substantial. Someone tentatively offered me a job at a Taverna on the beach. It’s an interesting proposition. I couldn’t ever see myself working in the service industry in let’s say, North America, where you’re expected to be fast and chipper and overly apologetic, but I’ve experienced the vibe at restaurants here, and no one’s in a rush. Which is the way it should be, especially if you’re coming to visit a tiny Greek island to escape from the big city or whatever. So much of me is praying that this summer will be as magical as the last. Falling in love with this place, things flowing nicely. Feeling fulfilled and healthy. Being able to travel to places I’ve never been before...Realizing it was possible to live by the sea, feeling hopeful, feeling reassured that things will work out. They always do, in their own way. For some reason I’m thinking of the intestines of the human body with all of their complicated folds, and nooks, and crannies. We eat something, and it eventually gets down there, sometimes after a long and complicated journey, sometimes it just passes right through us. And whether it’s something we shouldn’t have ingested or something incredibly delicious and good for us, it’ll all come out somehow and be okay. Or we die if it’s poison…Haha.. I’m not sure where I’m going with this...

Wherever you are, I hope that you are digesting life to the fullest given the circumstances! 

Sending love and all that good stuff your way. 

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 67 - 76: January 1 - 10 2021

Today is the tenth day of the next series of 365 days we’ve decided to call 2021. This New Year’s Eve was probably one of the least eventful of my life, but I’m completely okay with it. I’ve had more than enough hectic ones in my life. Z.X. more or less fell asleep before midnight, and I think I was finishing up my “skincare routine” around 23:59. 

As expected, life has returned to a more typical rhythm. Pleasant, no complaints. Yesterday, I saw my friend P.I. for the first time in a while. She was in Athens shortly before Christmas to go to the dentist and when she returned, responsibly self-imposed a two week quarantine to be sure she was COVID-free. I don’t think I mentioned it, but sometime in early December (I think.. But what’s time anymore, really?) there was a COVID scare here on the island. It ended up being a false positive rapid test, but some people were understandably freaked out. I digress… P.I. and I had a nice lunch with her family at her house. Bean soup (local), fried potatoes (from Naxos, most likely), cheese (local and non-local), and bread (local). Afterward, her father led us down the path to their land where they keep goats. We got up close to the baby goats, some of whom were about a week old. It felt wholesome. One of the mother goats had two babies, and basically refused to feed one of them. It’s so strange. P.I.’s dad, a pro, made sure she fulfilled her motherly duties. 

Last Saturday, I spent time with Q.E., also for the first time in a while. We went for a walk near her house in the port with her dog. I have a soft spot for her dog, who was peak puppy this summer when we first met. The dog destroyed so many of my clothes in her youthful excitement, but because of our bond she really recognizes me every time I see her, and it never fails to warm my heart. Q.E. always has great stories.

This afternoon, Z.X. and I went for a walk in Ano Meria, taking an unofficial path. There were a decent amount of sheep, baby ones too. It seems to be peak baby sheep and goat season, which feels comforting to witness. Life goes on, there’s always new life here on Planet Earth. We laid down in the grass for a while, walked back to the car and ran into some friends along the way. We drove to Agali beach to put our feet in the sand and run around before heading home. The days in between the weekends, or “weekdays” as I suppose they’re called, have been occupied by a pretty good balance of work, play, and rest. I’m co-hosting an online event this Wednesday for the New Moon in Capricorn, so in the past few days some of my energy went towards it.

My Greek is improving, I’ve got the alphabet almost down pat and I’m understanding more and more of what’s being said in conversations. 

I was thinking about things I miss at the moment. Not acutely, but still there. I miss riding a bike, skateboarding and rollerskating, going to concerts, friends and family in other cities, eating a slightly wider and more exotic variety of food, and the ability to travel carefree. There is also a sliver of a void present within me that can perhaps only be filled by shopping in a physical store, but in all, I feel satisfied here. As long as there’s WiFi and things to read. The nature alone here is worth it. Earlier this year, I became slightly fed up with the concept of parks… Designated places where nature is permitted to reside in a city, but where it is rarely allowed to fully do its thing. Maybe I’m still bitter because my favourite park in the place where I used to live closed its “Tree Sanctuary” section for several months this year. Maybe it’s because said park became something different this year. There were more people, many of whom didn’t do a great job of respecting it… Leaving trash and beer bottles strewn about. At a certain point, it no longer became a place of respite. I had to find places further and further away. To the outskirts of the city, but even there, it sometimes felt like there were too many people. I guess this is part of the reason I felt at ease here in Folegandros and felt compelled to stay. Many things are just allowed to be as they are. I think it also encourages people to be as they are. 

Wherever you are, may you be as you are, not what you feel pressured to be.

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 42 - 66: December 7 - 31 2020

For the remainder of December, I allowed myself to skip writing here. It felt off, somehow, so I honoured that. I guess I did the same thing last month, so maybe it’s my pattern. Or perhaps I’m lazy? Who cares?

Today is New Year’s Eve and I went swimming. Z.X. and I headed to Lygaria today, leaving the car at the top of the road, walking down, stopping to look out at the sea and the houses and the goats. We also went to the beach on Christmas Eve. Vardia, near the port. I really liked these two, and it’s always a treat going somewhere for the first time, especially on a small island. 

On Christmas Eve, I made a simple meal of fish and potatoes and peas. In the Roman Catholic tradition, you don’t eat meat on Christmas Eve so elaborate fish dishes are the norm. If I were with my family, we’d be eating two different types of seafood pasta along with a lot of other food. This Christmas was my first without my family, which was slightly strange, but in the context of the pandemic, it’s not like I was the only person to be separated from their family. We had a big family Zoom call as I sat on Z.X.’s couch by the fire, with chestnuts roasting. Having a completely chill Christmas with almost zero obligations was refreshing.

However, because of circumstances I found myself in, I actually had to cook on Christmas. Plan it all out. I baked cinnamon rolls (success!) and an apple pie (more like apple pizza as I didn’t really roll out the crust), roasted a chicken and vegetables and potatoes from Naxos. All of the grandmothers on the island baked more than enough, but I felt I had to step up and bake my own sweets. What would Christmas be like if I didn’t bake anything or if I hadn’t (finally) spray painted the branch K.P. picked up our walk weeks ago? What would have happened if I hadn’t insisted on listening to Christmas music and watching Christmas movies all day? I simply could not stand by and allow it to feel like any other day. 

K.P. left which was a big bummer. We’ve still been keeping in touch, though, which is nice, and she made it to Athens with no problems. Naturally, I’ve spent a lot of time with Z.X., but I loved passing the days with K.P., walking, cooking, joking around, dancing to a selection of our shared impeccable taste in music, speaking fragments of the languages we know to each other, and watching a variety of TV shows and movies of varying quality. Before she departed, we ran into F.H. outside Posto, a native Folegandriti (I think that’s how you say it) who has been living in Germany. A few days ago, I decided to get in touch with her to hang out with someone who’s a woman, closer to my age, and who’s clearly got an interesting story and some good vibes. She came to the house I’m staying at and I made us matcha lattes. I hope to see her again before she heads back to Deutschland!                      

I feel like things will shift after the holiday season. I’ve still been working here and there, but I’m sure things will “kick into high gear,” or at least higher gear, in a couple of days, once we all find ourselves in a new collective hallucination that we call 2021. 

This past week has been a pleasant, cozy haze of cooking, walking, some Pilates, hanging out with my cat, pondering the past without burrowing myself in it, writing, reading, and watching a lot of Below Deck. Reality TV fascinates me, and prior to this year, I was confused as to why anyone would want to watch a show about people who work on luxury chartered yachts, but now I’m hooked. I am addicted to the satisfying rhythm of each episode - watching the deck crew impeccably clean the boat all day, inevitably getting injured and angry at each other, waiting to see if the chef will fulfill his role of large ego-haver, watching the strange dynamics of the stewardesses and their hierarchies, seeing who wants to sleep with who and who will actually go for it on camera. 

Another thing that has become a habit is taking wild plants from the ground and eating them. I’ve only been comfortable with dandelion so far, but I need to ask someone to show me some other edible plants...

Z.X. and I aren’t sure we’ll make it to midnight tonight but I guess we’re going to try. Here’s to another quiet holiday! Thanks for reading, whoever you are. Enjoy the transition to the new year and everything that happens after! 

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 36 - 41: December 1 - 6 2020

I’m writing this, sitting outside, listening to goats bleat away and the goat master (I’m sure there’s an official word for this) making amusing noises and shouting at them. 

The sun will start to set in about an hour, I’m guessing. I feel so incredibly lucky to be able to spend so much time outdoors. I’ve been warned that December isn’t really winter yet here in Folegandros, that January and February will bring colder temperatures and days in a row of rain. I know I can handle it. For now, I’m enjoying swimming in December. 

Yesterday, Saturday, K.P. and I headed to Agios Georgios on the North side of the island, past Ano Meria. On the way, we stopped by the supermarket and the bakery. We each picked up a mikro (small) loaf of bread and some Christmas cookies to share. I met her and the man she’s staying with, A.L., in Chora outside a café where some people had gathered, semi-respecting social distancing. The sun was glorious. We dropped off A.L. at Agali, and he planned to walk to meet some fellow fishing companions at Agios Nikolaus, 15 minutes or so by foot. Fishing is not permitted at the moment, which is odd to me and I’d imagine most other people. It’s just you and the fish, right? Maybe you’re out there with other people, but are you really rubbing up against each other? Do people who fish like to embrace each other a lot? I have no clue!

When we arrived at Agios Georgios, we saw the two men who were supposed to be fishing with A.L., so K.P. went to pick him up and bring him back, so the fishing trio could unite. I laid in the sun in my bathing suit, listening to the metal playing on a small speaker they brought on the dock. It was glorious. I wrote in my notebook a bit, and then slowly but surely made my way into the water. Having a soundtrack to lazily swim around to was fun. 

K.P. returned with A.L., and K.P. helped one of the other fishermen retrieve one of his lures, borrowing some goggles to get the job done. I took photos of her after she completed the task. She looked incredible. A man she sent the photo to afterward said she looked like a Bond girl, and I wholeheartedly agreed. 

Unfortunately no fish were caught by our friends, but two spearfishers caught some! As K.P. and I played cards on the beach while the sun was still out, she joked that they should give us a fish. On the way home, we stopped to watch the sunset and danced on the roof of an abandoned building, listening to music on our phone speakers. Later, we made a Greek rice dish with carrots, leeks, and dill, I brought a fish from the store that had defrosted in my fridge and needed to be eaten, and K.P. grabbed some vegetables from the garden to make a salad. H.U., a friend of A.L.’s who fished with him earlier stuck around for a bit. The two of them drank vodka and raki (a spirit popular in Greek, Turkey, Albania, the Balkans, etc made of grape) and listened to music as we cooked. Another great meal! 

We had started watching The Rose starring Bette Midler the day before but were rudely interrupted by a power outage, so we finished it after dinner. Midler was nominated for an Oscar for it. I liked it. Apparently, it was loosely based on the life of Janis Joplin. On Friday, before we watched The Rose, K.P. and I went for a walk in Ano Meria to a bay that is named after trees or something. Déntro (δέντρο or maybe it’s the plural δέντρα) I believe it’s called, simply because there’s a couple of trees there. She spotted wild dandelion on the way there, so we picked a bunch on the way back. It made me so happy to be able to pull my own food from the earth. We confirmed it was dandelion for sure thanks to Ireni of Ireni’s Restaurant fame. She said it was poly kala (really good), so definitely edible! We ordered some food from her to take home - meatballs with fried potatoes and bean soup. Delicious and comforting, as per usual. 

Later, Z.X. brought over some souvlaki (no extra patates for me this time), then we watched Keeping up with the Kardashians together. Back to season 1 since we finished season 4 and on the TV’s mysterious Spanish Netflix account, only the first four seasons are available. After joking that Z.X. would fall asleep in 30 minutes, I fell asleep in 30 minutes. 

The week before Friday wasn’t super eventful...Tuesday stands out to me as it’s the day I found out I have shingles... Ha! Last weekend, I had asked Z.X. to scratch my back, and when he looked at it, he was concerned. He took a photo of it and sent it to the doctor. We went to the doctor on Tuesday, and she said it was herpes. I spent an entire day freaking out, but then later figured out it’s Herpes Zosta - which is the same as Chickenpox and NOT the sexually-transmitted kind… The nurse, who I had met earlier this summer and is also a Cancer, put a bandage over it and gave me a small stack of more to take home along with some anti-histamines. I read about what foods to avoid and chocolate is one of them, unfortunately, so since then, I haven’t eaten any chocolate and I’m eating much less sugar than before. Boring, but it’s rarely a bad idea to consume less sugar. Today, Sunday, December 6, I stayed in bed for a while, finishing the latest episode of Love After Lockup and then a documentary called My Psychedelic Love Story. The latter is about Joanna Harcourt-Smith, who had a love affair with Timothy Leary (the LSD guy) in the early to mid 70s, while Leary was on the lam from the U.S. feds in Europe, and then subsequently brought back to the U.S. and sentenced. I really enjoyed it and she’s a fascinating woman that passed away shortly before the documentary debuted at the end of November. After sweeping the floors, I decided to take a walk without my phone to the Panagia, a church up a hill that’s an icon of the island. It’s a zigzag promenade to get to the top, and I stopped at the first zig. I sat on a rock and wrote. The sun was so strong and I was a bit sweaty so I took off my shirt. A copy of The Alchemist was in my backpack, and I finished the last 60 pages or so on the grass below the rock. Watching the clouds move past the sun again and again was wonderful. I definitely felt more connected to God, my destiny, etc. finishing that book in that setting. 

Tonight, I think I’ll make the dandelion for dinner and count every single one of my blessings. The sun is beginning to set now, turning the sky the most magnificent colours.

Thanks for reading, once again! Love and light to you and yours.

[feelingfolegandros]

A few from this weekend.. 

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 14 - 35: November 8 - 30 2020

Continuing on… It was strange to be in the house without B.W. A decent amount of her belongings remained, which I eventually shipped back to Germany for her.

On Sunday November 8, I was happy to pick up my kitten Salem from my friend P.I.’s house. She was sweet enough to keep him for a few weeks while I was back in Berlin and for a bonus period after that. He had grown a bit, as was to be expected, and was getting along pretty well with P.I.’s younger sister’s new kitten, Simba. Her mother invited me to stay for lunch. We had matsata (homemade Greek pasta) with a meat I can’t remember. It was delicious and her family is so wonderful. P.I. and I caught up in the back of her house, reminiscing about the summer and filling each other in about everything. We met in the summer at a café on the beach she was working at. She’s also a Cancer like me, and so is Salem according to the vet. He was born July 10, 2020, apparently. 

The following weeks were spent catching up on life. I had overdue writing assignments and clients to reschedule with. Writing, sessions, eating, hanging out with Z.X., talking to a few friends and family members via my little phone screen. They were a pleasant blur. I listened to podcasts, I wondered whether or not I’m a good cat mom because Salem’s poops were unsatisfactory. I experimented with different cat food.  

I managed to swim several times this month. Each time made me feel so amazing and very Canadian, being able to “brave the cold.” Most recently was on Saturday at Fyra, a short walk from Agali beach. I went with my new friend K.P. I met her a few weeks ago when Z.X. and I were at Agios Nikolaus. I was semi-shocked to see a cool woman around my age who seemed not entirely Greek swimming naked. As soon as she uttered her first word in my direction, I knew she wasn’t from Folegandros, but from North America. Turns out, she’s from Montreal, where I lived for 6 years, and normally lives in the same German city as me! Craziness. She’s half Greek, half French Canadian, and has been coming to Folegandros for 20 years. I can’t imagine how many changes she’s observed here over the years. 

Since we met, we’ve established a ritual of meeting up on Fridays, hanging out and cooking something at the house she’s staying at. The first time, we tried to watch VHS tapes but they were all demagnetized. She made an incredible vegetable curry, though. Luckily, there were DVDs - we chose Interview with the Vampire followed by The Ninth Gate. The second time, P.I. joined us, and we walked around a part of the island called Petoussis, then Agali. We stopped by Z.X.’s house for a surprise visit on the way back. He was excited to serve us coffee and tea and little treats. Later, we baked an incredible apple pie and made pasta. K.P. even made fresh whipped cream. That house is extra amazing because of the fireplace, and K.P. is an expert fire starter, in more ways than one. 

One thing I found interesting in recent weeks is that there is no dental floss to purchase on the island. I need to investigate this further…

However, I finally made it to the hardware store, which is a fascinating place. They have electronics and Christmas decorations and Harry Potter flashlights and of course, practical things to fix your home or restaurant or hotel or whatever. Z.X. said he’s going to order some meat from Naxos. It’s not that you can’t get meat here, it’s just that it’s probably going to be frozen unless you know someone with livestock on the island. I’ve seen fresh meat at the grocery store in bulk, but I don’t feel confident enough to take it out of the fridge nor attempt to package it myself, nor ask about the price. Today was a lucky day at the grocery store because there were fresh eggs from Folegandros chickens. It makes me so happy to see a bunch of random, still kind of dirty eggs strewn in a plastic bucket that once contained feta or something. Yesterday, I finally saw my friend Q.E. She’s an older woman from Northern Europe that’s been living here for decades. We hadn’t seen each other since early October, so it was wonderful to tell each other stories and settle into our friendship again. I met her in August, a friend of the friend that first invited me to Folegandros. She came to my house, and since Z.X. was still around, we all talked, while her sweet dog Nana and Salem got acquainted. Salem, being a cat, wasn’t too happy about the situation, hissing in protest. When we felt ready, Q.E. and I went down to her house at the port, briefly saw her husband, then went for a leisurely drive to the other end of the island. She hadn’t been to Fyra in a while, so we walked there with Nana from Agali. It was cloudy but still beautiful. Even after four decades here, she’s still so mesmerized by the colours of the rock and how they change with the seasons. I love that she feels things so deeply and shares these observations with people around her. 

It’s strange to think it’s the end of November, that it’s nearly the end of this year. It will be the first time I celebrate Christmas without my family, and I’m sure there are many other people on Planet Earth that will be experiencing some holiday weirdness too. I’m hoping to have some sort of gathering at my house…K.P. found a beautiful branch that she graciously carried for me through the paths on our way to the beach this weekend. It will be my Christmas tree, soon decorated with random trinkets from the hardware store. More updates soon, as my “life” continues to unfold here! Thank you for reading. I’m sending love to your corner of the planet :)

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 7 - Day 13: November 2 - 7 2020

Greetings from the end of November. 

I hate the feeling of falling behind… It makes me feel like I’m back at school c. 2012 and I’ve been procrastinating on readings, or studying, or research, and all of a sudden it’s the end of semester and I have to cram everything into hours that are becoming scarcer and scarcer when really all I want to do is go to a warehouse party with my friends and split my soul up into a billion pieces with lord knows what and 

Alas, I am the master of my own fate; the captain of my own soul, so fuck all of that. There were things that happened this month that I couldn’t write about right away. And then after all that I needed some time to just LIVE and recalibrate and watch Love After Lockup and meet new unexpected friends and get an exciting project with an exciting company and then days later experience said opportunity evade my grasp like sand through my fingers.

I feel like being dramatic this evening, as I “catch up” on the last month of my “life.” Henceforth, I am banning myself from using the word “dramatic” as it was already used in my previous post. Expect everything through a lens of drama or something like that from now on. 

There was an interesting echo of the beginning of November, November 2 to be exact, on November 17. A man died on the island. I don’t think anyone thought he would. If I understood correctly, he had a brain aneurysm and / or stroke on or near a beach. He was 65. Decisions were made about whether or not he needed a helicopter to Athens, but perhaps not fast enough. According to a local source, there is some controversy over the speed at which he was helped. Maybe if a helicopter picked him up sooner, he’d still be alive. Who knows? What we all know for sure here is that not having a hospital on the island comes with consequences, and the stakes are extra high when someone has an accident or sudden thing go haywire in their body.  So on Monday, November 2, B.W. had a sudden thing go haywire in her body. I will not go into details, but it was something outside the expertise and capability of the island’s doctor, who is a kind, brilliant woman around the age of B.W. and I (late 20s, early 30s). She waited in pain for hours before the emergency boat ambulance arrived. To me, the boat ambulance appeared to be a small yacht that otherwise transported rich tourists c. 2008. Later that night into the next morning, we took an “air ambulance,” which, in a similar vein, was a private jet for rich tourists c. 2008. I remember joking with B.W. that we were on a private jet. It feels crazy, not to mention insensitive, to say much more about this situation. Most importantly, B.W. was fine in the end, and she is back in Germany now. She spent from Monday - Friday in a clinic, first in Santorini and then Athens. I was with her the whole time, running around, trying to figure things out and support her however I could. Greece was going back into lockdown that week, a lockdown I have half-lovingly, half-jokingly nicknamed “Lockdown 2.0.” In Athens, I could only get takeaway food, and masks were mandatory everywhere, even walking outside in the streets. It all felt so surreal… There were many layers of surreality. The first night / morning in Athens, I let the clinic staff help me book a hotel. I booked this fancy one that was 15 minutes from the clinic by foot. I remember drawing a bath at 5am and listening to the new Salem album (Fires in Heaven, highly recommended) in its entirety. Mere hours later, I went up to the breakfast buffet. It was on the top of the hotel, a decently high building. The view was gorgeous but the day was grey. Of course, the buffet was no longer self-serve so you had to ask the staff to put things on your plate. (“More pineapple… yep, still more, please”) 

Once we were pretty sure of the day B.W. would be allowed to leave the clinic, I planned my boat back to Folegandros, leaving that Saturday, November 7. Hours after I picked up my ticket in person from a vendor, I had to go back and change it. The Prime Minister announced a lockdown restricting travel between islands. Because I’m not Greek and have no business being in this country right now, quite frankly, my boyfriend Z.X. urged me to leave before Saturday, otherwise I might not be able to get back. I walked back to the ticket office and changed it to one leaving the next day, Friday… from a nearby port town of Lavrio. 

Friday, November 6… The weather wasn’t so great in the morning. I took a cab to Lavrio from Mona Stiraki in Athens. When I arrived, admittedly unnecessarily early for the boat, there was a rainstorm. I huddled under a not-so-sheltery shelter until I could board the boat. There were two main interior spaces. One was outfitted with grey vinyl seats, the other with red velvet ones. I opted for red velvet, and camped out in a corner that seemed like it would be quiet. As I mentioned, the weather wasn’t so great. If you’ve been paying attention, this phenomenon will likely correlate to a nauseating boat ride. And indeed, it did! After 3,4,5, who knows how many hours - a crew member told me we had to stop in Syros for the night, the boat would not be able to go on to any of the other destinations until maybe tomorrow, maybe Sunday depending on the weather. I explained my situation, not hiding my fear of having to go back to Athens and lord knows where after that because of the lockdown, but homeboy assured me it’ll be okay. He even said I could stay on the boat. No thank you! My frustration and heightened panic legible in my texts, Z.X. booked me a really nice hotel for the night. Thank God. I sometimes wonder what I’ve done to deserve this man, but really, everyone deserves a partner who will hold them down, especially in crazy travel situations in the middle of a global pandemic.

The hotel had a beautiful view of the water, which added to my ambient anxiety as I could see the boat and the incredibly choppy waves anytime I looked outside. The balcony was amazing, but the wind was smoking my cigarette faster than I could, reminding me of the very real possibility (to my panicked brain in that moment) that I would have to stay on Syros forever. 

I remember walking around Syros that night, stumbling into a giant store filled with cheap goods. There were Christmas decorations, clothes, pots, pans, electronics, various weird objects. I felt like I was in a daze. I almost bought socks, but I don’t think I wanted any sort of souvenir of my time there. I think I just ordered room service to eat? A club sandwich with fries. The boat was there the next morning, and left on time. The wind was so strong that it knocked the fresh juice in a plastic cup out of my hand, spilling onto my backpack. My hat also fell off. I just wanted to get on the fucking boat and get back onto Folegandros. After another nauseating journey, although not quite as nauseating as the previous day, I finally made it to the island. Because of the strong winds, I practically had to jump off the boat onto the dock. It felt like something out of a movie. I was so relieved to be back, to see familiar faces, especially Z.X’s. “I’m not going anywhere for a really long time,” I said to him. Z.X. was sweet and tried to convey the romance and excitement in our situation, comparing it to a movie he suggested I write. There was a part of me, an internal compass or something, that was so confused that my body had taken a boat yet again, so soon, from Athens to Folegandros. Weeks later, that part has been soothed but is still feeling the effects of being uprooted and swirled around...Alas! 

I will stop here, but continue with writing about the past weeks immediately! I promise.

Thank you for reading, wherever you are!

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 5 & 6 - October 31 & November 1 2020

I am writing the rest of this post much later than the actual days described. But I wrote some notes to remind myself what happened. My intention is to keep these two days relatively brief but as a writer, concision has never been my strong point. I’m a wordy, convoluted young woman!

So, on Halloween / Samhain / the glorious full moon in Taurus, etc. B.W. and I had breakfast, and then ventured out to Chora for an exciting shopping day. We were pleased to find fresh chorta at the market! Other exciting food purchases for me personally included tahini with cacao (better, healthier, etc than eating Nutella all the time, in my humble opinion), frozen okra, and whole meal bread at the bakery (which is now closed for the winter, but the one in Ano Meria remains open).

Later, we went to Karavostassi beach at the port. Our intention was to walk the whole way there and back, but we were fortunate enough to have successful hitchhikes both ways! Both were with people I had met before, which was nice. We didn’t stay too long, but we revelled in the fact we could swim at the end of October with the sun shining brightly. A few other people were there swimming too. 

Z.X. thought we should make a whole evening of seeing the Full Moon, and I agree. We watched the sunset and the subsequent “rising” of the Full Moon at the top of Pountaki beach. Then, we went for a romantic stroll on Livadi beach, where we had our first date. Z.X., who was drinking iced coffee complained about being cold… haha! We then went to To Zimaraki for dinner, a fantastic homemade pasta and pizza restaurant in Chora. I had been a few times with friends in the summer, but it was sweet to go there with a love interest. We ate stuffed mushrooms, a pizza I can’t recall… I think it had prosciutto on it, and the homemade bread that they served with a tasty dip. Irene has a special place in my heart, but To Zimaraki easily has the best (and maybe only) pizza on the island. At the restaurant, we ran into some familiar faces… Z.X.’s colleague and his wife, the wonderful couple that runs Amoudaki Café and apartments. It feels comforting being part of a small community, even though I’m very much an outsider. 

Much of Sunday was spent going on a somewhat treacherous hike with Z.X. B.W. unfortunately wasn’t feeling up to it, and she avoided some swampy paths and an area with no cell phone service. The lack of reception doesn’t bother me, but Z.X. is more or less on call 24/7 with his work, so it freaked him out a little bit. We decided to hike to Ambeli, a gorgeous, rocky beach past Ano Meria. 

One thing I’ve been enjoying about staying here for a while is noticing all the changes and transformations. Not necessarily in the obvious fact that there are less humans on the island at the end of October compared to mid-August, but more so in the landscape. The paths that I walked in August and September look so different now; feel so different under my feet. Wild grass and weeds and plants native to the island have sprouted. When you look at a hillside, it’s no longer dry and desert-like. A deep, earthy green dots the island’s natural canvas. On the path to Ambeli, which I hadn’t walked before, I was surprised by the green. At times, I felt like I was walking through a North American forest. I was reminded of the ravine behind my childhood home. It was fascinating. At times, Z.X. and I thought we strayed from the path. There was this part that was so swamp-like we had concerns about forging ahead. “What if I break my leg and we can’t call for help?” Z.X. worried aloud. I assured him it would be fine. And it was. At times, I cursed my slightly impractical Sketchers shoes that I had gotten for free at my old job. They’re incredibly comfortable, but just not made for hikes on a rocky Greek island. I think Z.X. made fun of me for them. We felt triumphant when we finally made it to the beach, and we had the place to ourselves. It was magical. Z.X. went in right away. I think I went to the bathroom somewhere nearby first. We had a wonderful swim, then sat on the rocks together. I read Fariha Roisin’s Like A Bird while Z.X. leaned on me. Eventually, we headed back via a different path and took a longer, beautiful walk back to the car. I remember feeling very expansive, unstoppable even, but in a peaceful way. 

The sunset that evening was particularly amazing. B.W. made caponata for dinner and it was delicious. She is really talented with food! I also gave her a Tarot reading as promised. I hate to sound dramatic, but here it goes anyway… Little did I know, so much could change so quickly. More to come soon. Catching up on two weeks of life, blog posts, and everything! Thanks for reading <3

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 2,3,4, - Wednesday, October 28 - Friday, October 30 2020

Apparently I’m a masochist, because I scheduled two client sessions for my second day back. Well, technically they scheduled themselves that day, but I blame myself for opening my calendar up so soon. Oh well, c’est la vie! I am blessed to have work! Especially work that doesn’t really feel like work. And really, the most lovely people somehow want to work with me, so that feels great. 

The first one was at 9:30am, and I thought I’d do it in my bedroom, because I have a little desk setup in here that is something in between a coffee table and a side table with a very loungey chair with pillows to cushion my butt.. I love it. However, the internet in this room doesn’t always love me. The connection in this particular room isn’t so stable, and it was making it difficult to have a flowy conversation with my client. After moving into the main room where B.W. was working away on her laptop (we’ve joked that it’s our coworking space), I couldn’t concentrate... When I have a one-on-one session, I really need total silence and privacy otherwise it kind of all goes to shit haha...I decided to ask my client to reschedule and she happily obliged. Phew! We had our proper session the following morning (Thursday) and it went well. 

On Thursday, I turned on TV in the living room/ coworking space for the first time and someone’s Spanish Netflix account was still logged in. Score! Not because I need to use a Netflix account (My Dad pays for a shared family account, thank you very much), but because I didn’t have the patience to figure out how to log in or type in my Dad’s email with the freaking TV remote. I gleefully watched Season 4 Episode 1 of Keeping Up with The Kardashians while lying down on the couch eating pasteli (I think that’s what they’re called.. It’s these Greek snacks made of sesame seeds and honey). I don’t think I’ve seen this season before… But it takes place c. 2009 or so when Khloé has her whirlwind romance with Lamar Odom and they get married about a month after they first start dating. Honestly… iconic. I found myself drawing parallels between Khloé and myself. The situation with my boyfriend also feels like quite a whirlwind although I’m not expecting a proposal nor a wedding anytime soon. However, I can’t say I haven’t already fantasized about our Big Fat Greek Beach Wedding, possibly held at the same taverna we met at. 

On Wednesday night, I went for a solo walk in the early evening in Chora. I love being alone here. I spent a lot of time alone on Folegandros when I came for the second time from mid-September to early October. Later, Z.X. came over, mostly because he forgot his phone charger. He ate too much and was a bit stressed about some things regarding his house (which he is renovating himself) so I made him a mint tea. The next morning (Thursday), I discovered we had fresh mint in the garden! So lucky! The mint made an appearance later the same day when I brought a bunch of it to my friend C.D.’s house. He is the brother of the bride of the wedding where Z.X. and I met. I met C.D. at the taverna he works at in the summer alongside his sister. They’re both amazing and funny and warmhearted. C.D. basically lives next door to B.W. and I, and we both paid him a visit - bundle of mint in tow. He boiled water in a traditional Greek coffee contraption for our tea, and we all drank our beverages outside, even though it rained earlier that day. He made himself a freddo espresso with milk. 

C.D. worked in IT in Athens for much of his life, but moved here at the end of January for a fresh start, away from city life. The four of us - the two Greeks Z.X., C.D., and the two Berliners B.W. and I all moved here for the same reason this year… Very interesting! It’s nice to be around people that are all still enthusiastic about the island. Some OG locals, ie. those who were born and raised here, are a little more jaded after the decades they’ve been here. Living somewhere, anywhere, long enough, you’re bound to find things about it that irritate you, even if you live on an island where each beach you go to is more beautiful than the next. 

Today is Friday. Z.X. proposed we go to the beach today, so he picked B.W. and I up around 13h. Before that, we put a load of laundry in and I took the garbage we’ve accumulated over the past couple of days to the bins near the bus stop. (It’s important to note that the plumbing here on Folegandros like much of Greece, is not that robust, so you’re not supposed to flush paper down the toilet. So most people put their used toilet paper in a bin. Hence, part of the reason why we had accumulated two medium-sized bags of garbage in a few days.) I realized on my way back home that there were bins much closer to the house. Another too-late realization was that the shortcut I took on the way there cut through a sheep’s / goat’s pasture. I did notice some poop as I was walking through, but I didn’t think much of it at the time. Are goats chill? I have no idea… I won’t take the risk again, and I also noticed two locals taking the official shortcut which doesn’t involve shuffling over two waist-height concrete walls… It involves using makeshift ladders to scale them! 

Back to the beach! This time, we went to Livadi beach near the port. While B.W. was gleefully swimming parallel to the shore, Z.X. and I were standing about ankle-deep in the water. Suddenly, we felt the submerged sand below us slowly, surreally shift. (Too many “s” words, but I’m leaving it… hahahah) I’m not sure who mentioned it first, but we soon concluded it must have been an earthquake. It reminded me of the only other time I felt one - just over a decade ago when I worked in a giant office building one summer. To me, it felt like a strange tear in the time-space continuum, a strange physical and existential headache, and like techtonic plates below were shifting (which I guess they technically are). Anyway, Z.X. and I got out of the water, more in awe than afraid, and he called one of his friends, who also felt it, and experienced it as dizziness. He checked his phone and there was indeed a 6.6 earthquake further north in Greece. On Samos, two teenagers lost their lives, and in neighbouring Turkey, there were more deaths and injuries as part of the country experienced a tsunami. 

Z.X. and I planned to see each other next on Saturday night, but he called me later on Friday saying that Ireni’s Restaurant (my favourite) was serving rabbit tonight, he was going to eat there with a few of his friends, and would I like to join? Hell yes I would… Hell yes I did. Ireni - a Greek grandmother / matriarch / goddess / chef extraordinaire - obviously stewed those rabbits for us like they were the last rabbits she’d ever stew. They were served very simply with French fries, but we also had chorta (bitter greens) and Greek salad before the main event. Everyone drank alcohol… white wine and Raki I believe, probably beer too, while I had my usual neró (water). It was my first time eating at Ireni’s since the summer, and I was so delighted to be back there. Meeting Z.X.’s friends was great too. One of them lives on Folegandros too, and has a lot of common with Z.X. The other two live in Sifinos (either that or Sikinos… so confusing!) and were in town for a month or so. They could all speak varying degrees of English (more than my pathetic amount of Greek) and it was yet another elbow in the side from God or whoever to learn some more of this beautiful language. Photos from that meal below...

That’s all for now. I have a lot of catching up to do on my daily life here… Both in writing and in general (all shall be revealed soon), but I hope you’re enjoying reading all of this, whoever you are....

[feelingfolegandros]

Day 1 - Tuesday, October 27 2020

Hello out there,

A friend I met here in Folegandros in September suggested I start a blog over the winter since I decided to stay. So here we are. Why not? Hi Paul! 

For those who aren’t aware (I wasn’t until about 3 months ago), Folegandros is a small island in Greece, part of the Cyclades. I first visited in mid-August and fell in love with it. 

I was initially there for a couple of weeks, then went to meet my friend B.W. in Palermo to celebrate her birthday, then returned for a few weeks in mid-September to early October, went back to Berlin for 2.5 weeks where I’ve been living for the past 5 years to purge myself of the vast majority of my possessions, my apartment, etc and returned just yesterday, technically, although it was very late Monday night. 

Our ferry (I say our because B.W., not just a friend but my best friend, is joining me for the winter) was scheduled to arrive at 00h35 but arrived nearly an hour late. We had left Athens at 14h55. 

To get here, there are a few ferry options which become increasingly sporadic as tourist season dwindles. There are typically two main options that I refer to as the “fast” and “slow” ferries. I don’t feel like explaining them now.

But okay, I guess I will elaborate. The slow ferry is quite slow… It takes just under 10 hours to get to Folegandros from Athens, with four or five stops at other islands on the way. B.W. wasn’t thrilled with the idea but I have resolved to never ever take the fast ferry again because not only is it more expensive, it also tends to be a heck of a lot more nauseating. 

With the “fast” ferry, we’re talking a journey of approximately 4.5 hours on the open sea without being able to get any fresh air for the entire duration. If the wind and therefore the waves are wild, you might vomit. At one point, on a journey from Folegandros to Athens last month, I was sitting on the ground, hunched over my open suitcase, just trying to keep it together. I think this was after I darted to the tiny airplane bathroom-sized facilities where shortly after I started vomitting, a man (I think) in the stall next to me also started vomitting. A beautiful vomit symphony. 

Okay, enough with the ferries, although it is the only way to get to the island, unless you’ve got access to a private boat or helicopter. 

We arrived early Tuesday morning (Day 1) at something like 1:30am, when the boat was scheduled to arrive at 00h35. For the last part of the journey, I went outside to the front of the boat and revelled in each second it crawled along the long North side of the island, peering out at the lights and thinking about my favourite people and places that I would soon return to. Drinking the air and the salt and the darkness and the mystery of the almost-full moon.

My boyfriend Z.X. picked us up from the port in his car. We met at a wedding a few weeks before. More on that later... He drove us to our house, our beautiful rental abode for the winter just outside the island’s main town, Chora. B.W. and I settled into our respective rooms, with Z.X. naturally joining me for the evening in mine.

In the proper morning, after a bit of sleep, we made some breakfast, and later picked up some things we needed for the house. In the afternoon, Z.X. drove us to Agali beach. The taverna was still open, although everything else was closed. I said hello to the man who owns one of the cafés (who by the way, is an extremely talented DJ...therefore his café consistently has the best music on the island) as he diligently cleaned what looked like a drying rack for dishes. When I went for a swim in the sea, I noticed two men dismantling the sign for a hotel… a sign of the times.. The end of the season. Time for winter. 

Definitely cooler than it was in early October, B.W. and I were still thrilled to be able to embrace the sea. We both feel very connected to the beach in general, to nature, to stillness, to relative simplicity in life. We bonded over our love of Greece, among other things, although she has a longer-term relationship with the nation. In fact, B.W. 

spent some of last winter on Santorini, which is very close to Folegandros. She had been quietly manifesting an opportunity to spend four months of this winter in Greece, and here we are. We met online in March at the start of this whole Covid thing and became closer just this summer. We consider each other sisters, basically. Cosmically, karmically bonded whether we like it or not! (We like it!) 

After Agali, after taking our turns walking along the shoreline together, separately…. Dancing, scooping up the sand, lying on my big purple psychedelic beach blanket I bought while in Palermo, laughing, counting our blessings, we headed to Ano Meria to watch the sunset. Ano Meria is the other town on the island. Z.X. lives and works there, and I have a dear friend, a true Folegandriti born and raised on the island, who also lives there with her family. Z.X. took us to a spot, according to him a former lookout point for the Italian army. We went inside the tiny stone structure, now largely filled with hay, and I carefully climbed up a tiny ladder out the window onto a rock. It was sublime. Life here in general is sublime, in my humble opinion. 

We drove back to the house, with Z.X. stopping now and then to speak to locals he recognized. It’s interesting, he’s Greek but not from Folegandros, and only moved here in September. So we’re both new to the island, making our own friends, figuring out our lives here separately and sort of together. After showering we headed into Chora to get something to eat. By this point, I was already verging on hanger (hunger + anger). I opted to take a quick lap around the village to get a few moments of alone time. Z.X. and B.W. settled on Souvlaki Club, one of the few places still open on the island. B.W. has some dietary restrictions, so there were only a couple of things she could eat… And Z.X. somehow forgot them in the order. All was okay in the end, and by the time we had all eaten a bit, we were in better spirits, joking about our first dinner together as a family. At least B.W. and I thought it was funny. One thing I am still wrapping my head around is the fact that it’s completely scandalous for someone (me) to order patates (french fries) with ketchup and mayonnaise.... Z.X. explained that the combination, and the fact that it’s too different sauces makes it unhealthy and a bizarre preference. I still don’t get it, but it’s one charming example of the cultural differences between a Greek man and an Italian-Canadian woman that’s been living in Germany for half a decade. We’re learning to compromise. For example, I opted to only have ketchup with my patates to avoid any scandal that evening at Souvlaki Club. The next morning, Z.X. compromised (with my gentle, playful insistence) by cleaning a few dishes in the morning before he left, instead of just leaving them for me. 

Alright, that’s all for Day 1. Let’s see if I can keep the other days more concise….

P.S. I’m going to use initials for everyone I mention in my posts. They will not be anyone’s real initials to protect the privacy of my friends, loved ones, strangers, etc.