Stability

| sideblog for venting mental health issues l|main @ thequeen-of-peasants

[remanence-of-love]

[adhdfeelsandmemes]

Adhd boredom basically has 3 settings. One, so bored all you want to do is sleep. Two, so bored you physically CANNOT sleep. And Three? Three is that hellish existence in which you experience bOTH AT THE SAME. DAMN. TIME.

[mcgilf]

I need a new interest immediately or I will slam my head into a wall

[sodrippy]

theres a certain kind of boredom that can ONLY be fixed by driving too fast

[eddie-kaspjack]

adhd is being desperate to get work done but being so repulsed by said work your brain would rather do a n y t h i n g else

[tinyroseperson]

my mind is so full, but also entirely empty

i am static, the physical embodiment of static

i am stuck in this perpetual loop of everything and nothing happening all at once

help

[adhdfeelsandmemes]

Former Gifted Kid is like a trademark adhd mood tbh 

[abcsofadhd]

(Source: me)

[gaysquaredwrites]

I mean

[yaoiadderall]

adhd is just ur mental state wildly switching between don’t stop me now and nobody as u rapidly go from hyperfocus to depression and back 

[adhd-worlds]

adhd is either "that's too long, I can't read that"

or "I'm going to read everything I can find on this topic before the hour is up"

[bpd-bbyg]

[sickdelights-deactivated2023091]

It's so frustrating not being obsessed with anything like what even is the purpose of life

[idkmaybeitsbpd]

I saw a TikTok and the person explained why the phrase, “if they wanted to, they would” didn’t work for them. They explained that the person could have really wanted to make the relationship work, wanted to give them affection or respond to that text back and text more but did they actually have the ability to do it, was the question. So the phrase, “Even though you want to, can you?” spoke volumes to me when they explained the phrase.

[idkmaybeitsbpd]

My brain: hey, bae hasn’t texted good morning yet

Me: ok…so text them first

My brain: but but I want them to do it first!

Me: I hear you but I’m also hearing a negative coping mechanism where you want them to “chase” you so you feel more wanted and we are working on not doing that because it’s manipulative and hurts our recovery so you can text first. It doesn’t mean they don’t like you any less. ❤️

[blackholebaybee]

Borderline Masking

I was having a think about masking today. People normally associate masking with autism, but very few people know about the masking that borderline people do. It actually serves two different functions with us. First, we mask like autistics do, in order to hide the “socially unacceptable” parts of ourselves from others. We can’t let them see our emotions, how we really feel about what they’ve said or how much they mean to us or how hurt we are. We mask so our passions don’t overwhelm others,  so that our intensity won’t frighten them away. We mask because we don’t want everyone to leave us.

The other reason we do it is because it helps us relate to others. We pick a new mask for every situation, one that’s made precisely to help us through that situation. When we make a new friend, we mirror them so they won’t hate us. When we’re in a meeting, we pretend we’re polite or “professional”. When we’re at work, we put on the face of someone who doesn’t abuse themselves regularly. We find new people to be all the time and we live so many different lives.

But the reason we mask in this second way is because we have no self to go home to. When we are alone, when there’s no one else to reflect, we look inside and we don’t find anyone. We don’t feel like a person. We might experience an intense chaos of emotions, but there’s nothing holding them together, no me to refer back to. We mask because the person we could have been died from all the pieces being taken away by people who were supposed to love us.

[terminally-unlikable]

If ppl with bpd are so bad why are we always the designated unlicensed therapist ?