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@femaleuncles
PHOEBE WAHL 2019 (1) (2) All profits from these print’s sales will be donated to the National Network for Abortion Funds
I wrote a zine about the path of my identity as a butch dyke. You can read it here.
Black Lesbians: An Annotated Bibliography, JR Roberts. 1981.
IN CONVERSATION: BECCA BLACKWELL OF ‘HURRICANE DIANE’ …When she was writing this, had me in mind… I was one of the only bull dykes —to use the term — acting in New York City on a regular basis since the early 90s… until whenever you want to consider that I became not a bull dyke.So Madeleine reached out to me and said, “Hey, I’ve written this part, I don’t know how you feel about playing butches anymore, but would you be interested in looking at this.”So, when she asked me, I was like, of course… I had many breakdowns doing this role because I thought it should be going to someone more marginalized than me, but then I thought, “Why am I doing this?” I’ve never even seen a “me” on stage.
I was just gonna post this and sigh because clearly people are being willfully obtuse? but hey why not list just a handful of examples, in no particular order:
wanting the day to be over so you can go home and take off your binder so you can breathe in peace
going on T and hoping there’ll be more research in the future on what effects that’ll have on your health
having to pretend to be a feminine straight girl around your family
shopping in the men’s sections and having everything be too big
passing as male at work and worrying people might find out you’re menstruating ‘cause you forgot your tampons
being bullied in school for being incorrectly female
not knowing whether your dysphoria is getting worse or if you just need a haircut
checking with all of your other butch/trans friends to see if any of them has found a gynecologist that won’t treat you like a freak
postponing a pregnancy test because the idea of being pregnant makes you dysphoric and you’d rather be in denial
not worrying about pregnancy when you’re with female partners
your girlfriend’s conservative family not attending your wedding
being uninvited to your friends’ sleepovers when their parents find out you’re… like that
relating to the first half of mulan as a child and not knowing why
getting a mastectomy
no, many of these aren’t exclusive to transmascs and butches, and no, not every single transmasc/butch will relate to every single thing, but that’s what makes a group of people a community and not just a bunch of carbon copies of each other.
oh fun activity! - the kinds of names we choose for ourselves are often extremely similar - there’s a big overlap in fashion sense in like every subculture - people who hate one of us tend to hate the other - (or in certain cases, unless we are very very very good at performing distance from the other, and even then Thin Fucking Ice, like, constantly one mistake away) - look up to the same historical figures to the point of arguing over who they’d be more like today - bad posture - very similar medical/health concerns, such as worsening/development of cervical cancer from not getting checked - feeling like we are taking up too much space/constant imposter syndrome - frequent overlap in dating circles - VERY common to identify as one before the other, possibly even back and forth - liking “gross” animals like rats and frogs - preferring masculine language like brother, while also being alienated by the way cis men behave - dysphoria relief in the woods - fetishized by the same groups of people - fear of barbershop followed by LOVING the barbershop - weird dichotomy of being infantilized and seen as predatory - feeling Seen when your family gives you mens stuff - subjected to the same policing of our bodies + presentations hmm… thats just off the dome
- being discouraged from or punished for nonfeminine behavior throughout development. That’s a big one
ALL FROGS loves you unconditionally !
Bobby Smith was born in Tampa in 1923. She had one run-in with the police –she was allegedly dating a policeman’s girlfriend – during which she was asked to remove her clothing to prove that she was a female. Bobby agreed to this demand but only in front of a female police officer. Bobby was dating Mary VanderWall from 1948-1959 (middle photo). Bobby then met her partner Kay Thompson (last photo) in 1959 and they had a commitment ceremony in 1960 at Bobby’s mother’s home. They founded the Metropolitan Community Church (MCC), an interdenominational Christian church, in Tampa during the 60s. Bobby also worked as a dark room technician and photographer. She passed in 2008.
Book rec for your followers: Girl Mans Up. It's about a butch lesbian who's sort of in that grey space between trans guy and butch. I found it very relatable, personally.
Thank you! I’ll have to check it out!
Radclyffe Hall, c.1930.
© National Portrait Gallery, London.
Radclyffe Hall by Howard Coster, 1932.
© National Portrait Gallery, London.
hannah gadsby photographed by annie leibovitz. inspired by picasso’s portrait of gertrude stein.
Call for Submissions
In Our Words: Finding Meaning in Shared Experiences is seeking creative writing submissions (of 1,500 words or less) from female/DFAB members of the LGBT community who have a complicated relationship with gender. We welcome submissions from anyone who meets this criteria, including but not limited to trans men, nonbinary individuals, butch lesbians, and detransitioned women. The aim is to create a public space where people from all walks of life can connect on shared experiences surrounding issues such as dysphoria, coming out, family, love and sexuality, and identity.
The project is being spearheaded by Lee, a transgender intentional peer support specialist who works out of Maine. S/he is the author of Reclaiming Trans Butch, where s/he details his/her own complicated relationship with gender, what role peer support played in pursuit of wellness, and how others in the community may benefit from it.
For more information, including full submission guidelines, click here.
“INFORMATION FOR THE FEMALE TO MALE crossdresser and transsexual,” 1985 second edition of a 1983 zine by Lou Sullivan. a guide for people assigned female at birth who either dress in masculine garb, pass as men sometimes or all the time, or physically transition. Language used is standard for the time; you might have to do some translation in your head to how you might talk about these things today. This is definitely a piece of cultural history; it contains some how-to (living, styling, medical access), some accounts & illustrations of this kind of person throughout history, biological information, & frank discussion of lived realities. It goes into both people who were from lesbian communities and people who entered gay mens communities. Of note is a recurring theme on how feminist ideals & womens movements helped make room for female “crossdressers and transsexuals” to exist openly, and how this is not at odds with feminism. My favorite thing I always notice in writings about female masculinity (et al) is the reassurance that you’re not alone and that there have always been people like you. Imagine finding this in 1983. Thanks to @starfuckerinquirewithin, who’s grandpa handed this down! LINK TO PDF
Why Christine and the Queens makes me feel like I’m ten years old and climbing a tree by Kate Mossman
I’m sure I’m not the only woman in the audience for whom Letissier stirs up a very strong, half-forgotten feeling of wanting to be a boy. Dolls were thrown out of my pushchair when I was small – I said they were “slimy”. I never owned a dress. For my fourth birthday, someone – no one can remember who – bought me a sword, a helmet and shield in bronze plastic. My first love, Freddy, and I met at nursery: we planned to get married and become builders. My second love, at primary school, I barely dared speak to – but we communicated through sport, competing at the backstroke down the length of the swimming pool, our necks strained and our eyes meeting. My secret alter ego, who lasted from the age of six to 11, was a boy called Ratty – part Artful Dodger, part Jo the crossing sweeper. His parents and sister had died in a freak accident and he was condemned to scavenge for food in rural locations.
When I was Ratty, I never felt more alive. It wasn’t that I thought boys had more fun: there was something bigger going on, to do with energy and freedom. I was straight, so I fancied boys – and to fancy them, and to want to be them too, made for a throbbing kind of self-sufficiency.
Watching Letissier slide across the floor in a perfect Michael Jackson move, or crouch on the rostrum with one knee raised like a runner about to take off, suddenly makes me feel wide awake, like I did when I was ten years old and climbing a tree. I wonder if women around me are getting a burst of that old, long-buried boy-feeling. There are no video screens, no close-ups, no head-set mics, but there’s a lot of marching around in a crocodile formation, like students in drama school. The whole set-up recalls the exhilaration of the first tribes you formed, the first “attitude” you showed; the oversized dad’s jacket or Michael Jackson glove you wore non-stop because you thought it made you look cool. When I got into secondary school, boys became aliens. But I do think that all girls are born half boy.
Female Masculinity by Jack Halberstam
Tomboyism is punished, however, when it appears to be the sign of extreme male identification (takings a boy’s name or refusing to wear girl clothing of any type) and when it threatens to extend beyond childhood and into adolescence. Teenage tomboyism presents a problem and tends to be subject to the most severe efforts to reorient. We could say that tomboyism is tolerated as long as the child remains prepubescent; as soon as puberty begins, however, the full force of gender conformity descends on the girl. Gender conformity is pressed onto all girls, not just tomboys, and this is where it becomes hard to uphold the notion that male femininity presents a greater threat to social and familial stability than female masculinity. Female adolescence represents the crisis of coming of age as a girl in a male-dominated society. If adolescence for boys represents a rite of passage (much celebrated in Western literature in the form of the bildungsroman), and an ascension to some version (however attenuated) of social power, for girls, adolescence is a lesson in restraint, punishment, and repression. It is in the context of female adolescence that the tomboy instincts of millions of girls are remodeled into compliant forms of femininity.
That any girls do emerge at the end of adolescence as masculine women is quite amazing.
rain!
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