Stop trying to make fetchhappen.

If I was a drag queen my name would be Jennifer the Postlady- cause I'd always deliver 📬👑. Polish lad in London, straight as a very bended thing. Slut for food and dogs. Don't know how to use emojis. Don't blame me for this👇

[cynicz]

[dreadianz]

isn’t rick and morty that thing you get when you die and your body gets all stiff

[mostlydeadcowboy]

[cameos]

[diarygirls]

being born in the late 90′s is a really weird time because our coming of age is/was so tied into the expansion of personal technology? like for so many of us the transition from getting your first flip phone to smartphones wasn’t just a technology shift, it was part of growing up. and it created this really weird timeline where new technologies were being created right as we entered the right age market to use them, so now we all know intuitively how to use snapchat or the social context of emoji use or whatever but we can also remember childhoods spent (almost) entirely outside and offline. like you get all the disillusionment of the older millennial generation except now with the stress of spending your adolescence measuring yourself against others on social media and it’s really fucking confusing

[little-miss-rasputin-pageant]

you put it into words

[meanplastic]

My girl Melanie came thru for us.

[littlemixens]

why do people say “don’t be a pussy” when talking about weakness more like “don’t be a man’s ego” because you know there isn’t nothing more fragile than that

[nothingnowherenoonearchive]

uh 

because “pussy” is the shortened form of the word “pusillanimous”, which means “timid, cowardly”

and not the slang word for the female genital region?

[follow-puppy-luv96-deactivated2]

literally no one else knows this. nobody. 

[definitelyshitty]

WHAT

[tyronesuplac]

Sensational.

[definitelyshitty]

Remarkable.

[geraltcirilla]

it’s a real word

[snarky-gourmet-deactivated20250]

you: pussy

me, an intellectual: pusillanimous

[notglacier]

you know this fucking tune

[stuffmikeclicked]

They made it into a ringtone because it was old enough to be public domain, and Nokia (I think?) didn’t want to have to pay royalties.

… I like the full version.

[deadgrlwalking-deactivated20210]

Pokemon Indigo League // Season 1 Episode 20

[adeles]

#when someone asks me how life’s going

[fruitgushers]

facts

lana gays = tops

grimes gays = vers bottoms

marina gays = powerbottoms

fka twigs gays = sub tops

beyonce gays = true vers

gaga gays = zygotic gays. can be any gay

taylor swift gays =  basic bottoms

cupcakke gays = vers tops

lorde gays = sub tops and powerbottoms

carly gays = bottoms

sia gays = zygotic gays. can be any gay

britney gays = bottoms

cher gays = daddy doms

madonna gays = daddy subs

bjork gays = weird feitsh gays

[chikkou]

as i said before lana gays are DEFINITELY power bottoms. but the rest of this list is solid 

[fruitgushers]

there is no way lana gays are anything but tops. how can any gay listen to lana and not want to top? it doesnt add up. as a lana gay who identifies as a vers top i feel that this is an affront to everything lana stands for

[chikkou]

your first mistake was admitting that you are, in fact, a lana gay, thus showing your bias. no singular person has listened to lanas music and wanted to top as a result. lanas entire aesthetic is about doing controlling the situation while letting her partner believe they have the control and rewarding her for it. her gays can be nothing else but power bottoms

[sirenymph-deactivated20180131]

[teuer]

[fetchhappen-blog]

florence welch: forest goddess, queen of the fae

hozier: florence's son with a mortal woodcutter, trapped between the mortal realm and the fae realm

lorde: dark entity summoned by victorian occultists

lady gaga: diva possessed by the spirit of a modern art exhibit

beyonce and solange: the sun and the moon

kanye west: protagonist of an epic greek tragedy

lana del rey: met the devil at the crossroads and sucked his dick

carly rae jepsen: a mortal, but we don't deserve her

[metalslugx-deactivated20220413]

Goth Clowns are just Mimes 

[mariopowertennis]

My gf who works with clowns says that mimes came first so technically clowns are just Scene Mimes 

[orchidvioletindigo]

Your gf who works with clowns

[judevic]

i want to be given verbal encouragement by a dog who speaks in a deep otherworldly voice 

[teacupsandcauldrons-deactivated]

But like why is there still this concept that males don’t like cute mushy romantic shit and being emotionally taken care of? Just the other day I was cuddling with my boyfriend and after admiring him for awhile I told him, “Your eyes are so beautiful, they look like mini oceans” and I swear to god I heard him squeak in embarrassment and saw his cheeks actually begin to blush. Sometimes he likes being the little spoon and although I’m half his size I’m always happy to play jet pack. If he’s having a bad day he knows he can lay his head on my shoulder and just bawl his eyes out and I won’t think any less of him. Guys have emotional needs and want to feel loved and taken care of too yanno.

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

isnt it weird that we cant ride any other animals except horses. like if horses weren’t a thing humans would be fucked cause we couldn’t ride any other animals. like riding animals just wouldn’t really be a thing. we should probably be more grateful to horses

[burger-czar-deactivated20180324]

elephants

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

blocked

[toaster-hacker-deactivated20181]

camels

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

extra blocked

[sinfulpercy]

donkeys

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

ultra blocked

[uncertifiedhuman]

that dick

[fdsfjdsfjkf93723679267-deactiva]

… followed