but what if dean pants out “i need you” against castiel’s skin during sex? “i need you, i need you,” over and over again like prayer, getting more and more garbled and incomplete. “cas, i–i need you–cas–!”

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@ficsanddicks
but what if dean pants out “i need you” against castiel’s skin during sex? “i need you, i need you,” over and over again like prayer, getting more and more garbled and incomplete. “cas, i–i need you–cas–!”
Well, not *all* of our content is gone, but a good portion is. Thanks, tumblr. Saving the world, one naked butt at a time.
Statement
As you all are aware, tumblr has decided to start getting rid of blogs with adult content, tagged or otherwise. We are clearly one of those blogs and anticipate being deleted. We hope you all have enjoyed all the fics (and dicks) on our blog.
everything about this is fucking hilarious. i’m sorry, random pompeii man, but your death was some looney tunes bullshit and the framing of this photograph isn’t helping.
Everybody Ought to have a Maid
Inspired by this, this, and a convo with a mutual.
It had started out as a joke. Sam was sitting on his couch drinking beer—as Dean did his stress cleaning—looking at Dean with his amused bitchface.
“Dude, maybe you ought to clean houses.”
“What’s that, Sammy?” asked Dean, pausing mid-sweep.
“I’m just saying, might as well turn some of your manic energy into cash.”
Dean turned to him with as much grace as he could muster while dumping the contents of his 3-for-1 dust pan into his stainless steel trash can.
“Ain’t nothing wrong with a man taking care in his castle,” said Dean as he surveyed his flannel shirt for errant dust bunnies.
Sam snorted as he took a pull of his beer, and Dean knelt on his haunches to rummage under the sink.
“Dean. ‘Care’ is taking out the garbage or keeping up on the dishes. I’m surprised you haven’t Pledged the floors yet.”
Dean looked at the can of dollar-store “lemon spray” in his hand, before putting it back.
“Yeah, yeah. All right, all right. Shut your trap and let’s get a movie cued up before Charlie and Gilda get here.”
It had been a joke. That was until Bobby had pulled him into his office a few days prior.
“I’m sorry, son,” Bobby said as he poured Dean 2 fingers of rotgut. “You’re my best mechanic, which is why I’m only cutting your hours. I’ve had to let both Cole and Andy go. Business just ain’t what it used to be with these computerized cars and the Jiffy Whatsit Pop that moved in down the street.”
So that’s why Dean and his two friends Jack & Jim were staring at the “Careers!” section of the “Clean Team’s” website. Emboldened by his liquid courage and by his anxiety for rent, Dean finally hit “send” on his application before hitting his bed.
Keep reading
I made it my goal today to mix Dean’s ‘sex is’ speech from Rock and a Hard Place with all the best audio of him breathing heavily and grunting and basically making pornographic sound effects and well… this happened.
Put headphones on, hide the children, turn off the lights, and enjoy.
Not our usual, but oh dear lord… -T
Dude…yes
I’m blushing right now, and I can’t stop smiling and giggling.
I need a moment. Christ all sweet fuck, maybe two.
I need to catch my breath… Holy…
I WILL NEVER BE OVER THIS
deansdirtylittlesecretsblog
This is fucking awesome who ever made this u will be forever loved!!!!!!!
oh… my… god…
I will never not reblog this.
but-deans-back-tho you can thank me later
I’ve seen this before and I love it but ideally Thunderstruck would not be playing in the background and I could focus my full attention on the grunting.
Sweet fuck and all that is holy. My god. How to make a smut writer blush: THIS. my god. My 4 year old asked me what was wrong. I’m…I’m not okay after that. misswhizzy rizlow1 have you heard this? Because, damn. I need a moment.
Sweetie, I have this in my iTunes! :D It is great inspiration!
And BTW, there’s a Sam version, too :D
The. Greatest. Audio. Ever. Made.
Oh. My. Sweet. Castiel. I had forgotten how very HOT that is.
rizlow1 SAM VERSION????? WHERE???? GIMME!!!!!
I should let this play when I write. Does anyone have the Sam version? I need it for scientific purposes…because I’m a writer and we do research. Yes research.
Sweet Christ on a crutch… I’m at work right now, people. I’m trying to be academic and instead I’m dying… twofriesshortofhomicide - can we get some of your best Dean Extreme Distress or Stellar Blowjob moments for visual reference?
YASSSSSSSS
For the love of all that is holy…
(THROWBACK YA’LL) ((extremely nsfw audio but omg))
Holy shit, how have I never seen this post before? Keeping it for scientific purposes, yep.
Definitely for science… no other reason whatsoever…
Oh my god.
Damn! So hot! ❤️❤️
@karlee-fay-my-wayward-son for purely research purposes. y'know to write. pure things. like fluff.
Merry Christmas and have a happy holiday guys! :D
“Easy, Cas,” Dean moans as Cas buries his face deeper into the crook of Dean’s neck, whimpering almost pitifully.
“I know, baby,” Dean soothes, one hand sliding up to cup Cas’ shoulder and trying to slow him down. "But if you’re gonna build up the stamina to fuck me, you have to hold off for me. Can you do that?“
Cas lets out a shivery sigh and his hips slow mid thrust. He’s still close though, Dean can tell. Cas’ cock twitches where it’s still confined in his underwear, and Dean’s own answers in kind, bare where it’s nudged tight between the side of Cas’ and his pelvis. Neither one of them can go much longer, he knows. But they’ve been at it for a while, Cas humping him desperately and then Dean slowing him down when he’s right on the edge.
And god, Cas could probably hold out to actually fuck him now, Dean knows. He lasts almost ten minutes now every time. But, honestly? Cas has been like a horny teenager since he lost his grace, going through what amounts to human puberty in a rapid fire way Dean’s glad he never had to experience. And Dean fucking loves it. The way Cas is always so greedy for him. How quick he loses it. The training sessions where Cas just rubs against him, Dean edging him until Cas is almost crazy with the need to blow his load.
There’s nothing quite like Cas’ red, sweaty face, hair plastered to his forehed, eyes wild and needy as he huffs and puffs over Dean, hips snapping and rolling sinuously. Dean loves Cas’ rock hard dick butting up against his own through his briefs. Loves the way he can feel the wet spot as it grows darker and darker over the head of Cas’ cock.
He can remember being a teen and being frustrated by intense grinding, make out sessions like this. But now he loves every second of it. And as much as he is so eager to finally have Cas inside him, stretching him open and brushing over his prostate, he’s not quite ready to give this up.
Turning his head, Dean breathes hot and heavy over the shell of Cas’ ear, twists his own hips slighting, and groans. Despite the fact that he’s trying to hold back, Cas comes with a gritty whine, his hips stuttering and his body drawing tight and Dean bites back his grin. So predictable. So fucking easy.
When Cas goes limp over him Dean is quick to console him, “It’s okay, baby. You tried so hard. And you lasted a long time. Didn’t quite make our fifteen minute goal though.”
“Maybe next time,” Cas sighs, but he doesn’t sound too upset about it either and Dean thinks maybe Cas is enjoying this build up as much as he is. "But I should probably…”
Cas’ words trail off as his body shifts and his mouth starts its downward trek over Dean’s body. Oh yeah. That. Dean bites his lip and lets his eyes fall closed as Cas’ hot mouth sucks at his left hip bone. Yeah, it really doesn’t hurt that this always ends with Cas’ plush mouth sealed over his cock.
He’s not sure how long they’ll have to keep doing this before Cas is able to hang in there long enough to actually get his dick in Dean. But Dean’s never been a quitter.
I can totally see this. cas has never had sex before and never been touched like that. now he’s human and suddenly feeling things he never experienced before and he can indulge in it now that he isn’t an angel. he can just let himself feel good now.
Fandom: Supernatural Characters: Dean/Castiel
(I’ll just leave this here… it’s nsfw, right? @_@)
dean and cas were in bed doin it super fast, BAM BAM BAM BAM. HOOH!! dean was hittin it so good til it sounded like stirring potato salad. it was so lubey cas’ ass was a like slip and slide. WHOAAA dean said. then the worst thing happened. he pulled out and then he missed the booty. he dicked forward but there was just buttbone in the way. it was too late to stop. too much inertia. his willy bent in half like a broken cornstalk. cas turned around to see what happened. “WHAT HAPPENED, DEAN. DID YOU HONK YOUR WEEN?” he had honked his ween. he was crying. it was his only ween. cas turned around and hugged dean. he put a blanket over him and tucked it in around his bent ween. he patted it and the tip just kinda swung back and forth. "thank you for comforting my ween, cas. i still hurt but i feel comforted now.“ it took six months but his ween healed, now with a slight curve in it but otherwise still good. the scars stayed with him forever but he was going to be okay.
Team Free Dicks
university!au where castiel’s friends get him drunk after finals week and they end up stopping by walmart at like 3am to get some snacks and they completely lose track of him so cas manages to get a hold of the PA system and just
“will the owner of the 67’ chevy impala please fuck me?”
and dean totally hears it from where he’s innocently picking up his orange juice and he doesn’t get to properly meet cas ofc but he sure does give hannah his number just in case her friend is still interested once he sobers up
cas has bed head and a cute star trek shirt so he’s pretty sure they’ll get along
Dean+Cas +Astroglide+ confessional booth= i'm going to hell
like, doing it IN a confessional booth?
Are we talking AU or on a case or something? Canon works better, I think.
So, like, they’re on a case - SEPARATELY - and Cas of course gets to town first, and the brothers get there later and Cas posing as a priest and Dean sees him and Sam has to hit him because he’s staring at Cas in a priest costume and just getting IDEAS from that. And So of course Dean has to fuck with him.
Pops in and Cas is shocked to hear “Forgive me father for I have sinned it’s been…a really fucking long time since my last confession.”
Cas holds back a sigh, “And what sins have you committed since then?”
“Well, had a weird bit with God’s sister, some weirder shit with the devil, but got that handled. Uh…murder. Drinking. Stealing. Fornication. So much fornication…”
Castiel fails at control and that long, annoyed sigh escapes. But he can’t see Dean’s grin falter and fall on the other side of the screen. “Impure thoughts. About leading friends into sin.”
“What sort of sin?”
“You heard the fornication part, right?”
“You wish to…corrupt your…friends?”
“Well, one actually. He’d never really go for it, cause he’s way too good for me. For anyone but…I get to thinking sometimes, about what we could do, or what we could have if i wasn’t such a chicken shit. Hell, last time I was in a confessional he ws all I could think about…the feeling I have for him that I’m just too afraid to touch but…”
“You shouldn’t be afraid, he might…welcome your feelings.” Cas’s voice is tight and scared.
“he should tell me to fuck off, if he knows what’s good for him. I’ll only get him killed. Again.”
“Maybe you’re worth dying for, to him. And maybe he hopes you’ll…lead him into sin.”
“Well, if that was case, I should probably confess I brought lube into a confessional booth.”
At this point it’s a very easy thing fr Cas to just tears away the barrier between them and fall into Dean’s lap and kiss the sin out of his mouth. It’s definitely a tight and awkward fit but, well, the lube helps with that and Dean’s gonna treasure the image of Cas riding him in a priest get up in church as one of the very best reasons he’s going to hell.
I love to the death the soulmate!AU universe with words on your skin, be it the ‘first words your soulmate will say to you’ or the ‘first thoughts they had when meeting you’. And I’ve read a lot of goofy words, suprising words, romantic words.
But you know what I miss?
I want soulmate!AU that will meet in a stupid car accident and swear like sailors at each other about the paint job. I want doctors that will meet them as patients in their emergency waiting room only to find them juring at their broken foot. I want people that will meet completely smashed in a club and for their first thought to be filthy as all hell. I want soulmates that will meet on the internet and their first comment will be to congratulate the other about a particularly hot smut piece they wrote.
Now, I want you to imagine all these people as little children.
And I want you to imagine being their parents.
Trying to protect your kid from them for as long as possible because “omg John no the first words my son will learn to read will not be ‘I want to eat his ass’!!” and “This is not even anatomically possible!”
I want you to imagine them trying to explain to biggot aunt Marth at thanksgiving why your precious bundle of joy has a beautifully described page 43 of the gay kamasutra detailled on his little arm.
I want you to imagine them going at the first kindergarden parents-teachers reunion and try not to cringe under the judgmental look of the teacher.
I want you to imagine the hospital giving all new parents a personalized plush bear with their baby’s phrase engraved in the heart between his paw, and i want you to imagine the look on that nurse face when he has to come into the room with the bear.
And then, years later, I want you to imagine the parents meeting their kid’s soulmate. Looking at them straight in the eyes and knowing. Knowing, like they’ve known for years, what this person has wanted to do to their precious kid in excruciating details.
I want you to imagine the first dinner.
Please just. Imagine these AU
He looks so ready.