So for my first post I'm going to start talking about arses and see where that goes. Out the other end probably (hardy harrrr). Its a part of our body we don't really get to know that well. I mean its hard to look at it, even with a mirror. Have I looked at my arse in a mirror? Yes, maybe once or twice, just because the mirror was there in the bathroom I think, it was in someone else's house once I believe. I mean why not. Chances are if you add up all the days you have existed on the planet, maybe 10 to 15 of them there's a possibility you've looked at your own arse. Are there focus groups or studies on this statistic??? Which brings me to another interesting thought here, why are people so protective of their arse? I notice those paper things in public toilets that cover the seat, why are those there? I mean you are just plomping your dirty ass down on a dirty toilet seat, what's the worst that's going to happen? You are going to get a speck of urine on your ass and then you get some kind of bubonic plague? If there was a speck of urine and you put the wafer thin paper thing down isn't that going to soak thru and get on your ass anyways? The Japanese have it right, no toilet seat. Just pull down the khakis and let rip into a hole on the ground. One of my favorite quotes was by my friend Joost who is a professional horse racing jockey in Holland. "Once all the horses have passed you all that's left to do is try to pass what is in front of you" in his book Diary of a Legless Horse. In Holland they have a mix of normal toilets and holes in the ground cause they get a lot of Japanese tourists taking pictures of tulips. Thanks for following my blog, you will find a lot of useful information here like the best way to feed a blind cat and how to throw a 100 mile an hour fastball using only your head.
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