Forgiveness isn't easy. Anyone who's been truly hurt will agree. In fact, many who have walked the path of forgiveness in their marriage will tell you that it's a journey, and you often start it without fully knowing where you'll finish. It takes grit and guts to start down the path, and even more to finish. But as always, you can have hope in Christ. As followers of Jesus, we're taught to "forgive each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." (Eph 4:32, see also Col 3:13) Here's the catch: there's nothing in there about it being an easy process. Forgiveness is messy, it takes time, and it takes work. Perhaps that's why Dr. Chapman said it's a commitment and not a feeling? God's command to forgive is for our own good. Harboring bitterness and unforgiveness is like poison. It kills you from the inside out over time. Forgiveness in light of God's forgiveness, however, is always the cure. Does forgiving mean you immediately trust again? Not always. Trust takes time to rebuild. Does forgiveness mean you stop feeling pain at times? Not necessarily. Healing takes time and help from outside counsel. Does forgiving your spouse mean you're committed to reconciling as far as it's up to you? Yes, it does. But that's why it's a commitment. True reconciliation isn't a quick fix. It takes dedication, communication, work, rebuilding trust, and plenty of time. Whatever you've dealt with, and whatever you're currently dealing with, we urge you to hope in Christ. Look to him and behold the gift of forgiveness you've received when you are in him. He, of all men, has every right to feel wronged and to hold our wrongs against us, yet he freely forgives. He forgives, he loves, and he accepts because of his merit, not yours. Let that sink in. If you're feeling hurt, sad, or hopeless right now, our hope is that you'd know that forgiveness is possible though it may not feel like it at times. Trust God as you forgive. It's a journey, and at times the path may feel unclear—you won't always feel it—but your destination is sure. Stay the course and trust your Guide; he is faithful to bring you to the other side. Stay fierce, Ryan & Selena https://www.instagram.com/p/B-IGp5_BHV_/?igshid=11yp7lfokdtwk