femme fatale

fallon koehl. 28. escort. femme fatale; always on the run. diamonds on my wrist, whiskey on my tongue. before i give back, i gotta get drunk. so, get over here, pour me a cold one. babe you can see that i'm danger; teetering off of the stage, yeah. sparkling in sequins, say hey-yeah. time to give in to the kindness of strangers.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[grace-donaghan-blog]

Well from where I’m standing if you’re talking to yourself, maybe we should check you in somewhere. I don’t think you’re crazy, maybe just a little confused. Are you intoxicated? And besides, maybe underneath all that prickly sass and grime, I think there might be a sexy woman there. Trust me, babe, I don’t give my time of day to just anyone. 

[filthyfallon]

Haven't had a drop and if talking to myself is the most insane thing I do then I'd say I got out of life fairly well off. Wow, you really do think highly of yourself, don't you? I may not be some prissy, glitzy, glammed up bitch like you, but that doesn't make me any less of a sexy woman. Some people even think my prickly sass and grime is sexy. Maybe not..but then again I really don't give a fuck...

[delaneyalbright-deactivated2014]

Yeah. It, uh, wasn’t really worth imagining. I try not to now that I’m away. So, Sedaris, yeah? Any chance you’ve got one of his I could borrow? Promise to return it in mint condition. 

[filthyfallon]

Baby, neither was my childhood. I'd say we should swap sob stories, but Sedaris is a little better at it. I've got plenty I could share, but if they come back without a little more wear and tear I might have to kick your ass. Feel free to add some notes in the margins and highlight shit. Shit. Most of my books look like a damn rainbow.

[delaneyalbright-deactivated2014]

You could say that. My mom didn’t keep many books around the house, and the ones she did were more often used as coasters. Just a box of some of my grandpa’s in the attic, so I guess you could say I’m more of a classics girl. 

[filthyfallon]

...I cannot imagine living that way. Also, don't get me wrong, the classics are fabulous...but you've gotta keep up with the times, girl! Get with it!

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[grace-donaghan-blog]

Well that makes one of us that isn’t concerned about their appearance. Didn’t you know first impressions are everything? And sweetie, I’m not the one who snapped at a girl just walking by. If you didn’t want my opinion, you probably should have kept your mouth shut.

[filthyfallon]

Oh, please hop off your high horse and remove the stick from your ass, thanks. First impressions can get fucked, just like everything else in this city. Who even said I was fucking talking to you? Maybe you were the only one who responded. And if I look so incredibly horrendous, why would you even bother giving me the time of day anyway Takes two to tango, sweetie. 

[delaneyalbright-deactivated2014]

If you say so. 

[filthyfallon]

I can't. How do you not like Sedaris? Like, were you raised by cavemen or wolves or...weird people?

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[alastair-scott]

Am I not supposed to hug you?

Fallon, talk to me. I adore you. I wanna know what’s going on.

[filthyfallon]

Alastair, baby. How often do I threaten to take off people's limbs with my bare hands? I'm not a hugger. I'll make an exception for you, though...

You're one of the few, love, but...I don't know if I even remember how to talk about this kind of thing...

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[sloanecahill]

Of course not, you do what you want. 

[filthyfallon]

Much better. I always do. 

[delaneyalbright-deactivated2014]

You’re reading that?

[filthyfallon]

Dude...Sedaris is the man. Don't hate on Sedaris...

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[emma-reed]

No need to apologize, gotta keep the inner bitch well tuned and ready to strike. 

[filthyfallon]

Too true. Though, mine never took too much practice. It kind of just always came naturally to me...

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[littlemiss-lilianax]

Yeah, of course.  Are you alright?

[filthyfallon]

I'll be fine. It's just been a long fucking morning...

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[grace-donaghan-blog]

Lack of manners and what appears to be general hygiene. And you’ve got mascara running down your face. It’s not a good look for you, honey.

[filthyfallon]

Sorry, I grew up without a momma to teach me how to be a proper lady. Not to be a bitch or anything, but I'm really not too concerned with my overall appearance at the moment, not that you'd look any better than I would right now. So, if you would ever so kindly take you unwanted and unsolicited opinion and shove it right up your ass, I'd be beyond grateful.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[sloanecahill]

Alright, sweetheart, if you say so…

[filthyfallon]

Oh, and I do. You got a problem with that?

[sickeningkaplan-deactivated2014]

Yeah, I think I have some like, kale, or something, around here somewhere if you’re hungry.

[filthyfallon]

That could have been the best reaction to that answer I've ever heard, but don't worry. I'll work off the calories one way or another.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[alastair-scott]

Sweetheart, no, come here. What’s going on?

[filthyfallon]

...You're hugging me...

It's just...been an off morning. I'll be better later tonight. I just...I need a little me time.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[sloanecahill]

I just wanted to make sure you were okay, no need to snap. 

[filthyfallon]

Whether I'm okay or not is really none of your concern. I'm a big girl and I can handle myself.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[littlemiss-lilianax]

No!  No you just — dropped your phone.  Or at least, I think that’s your phone.

[filthyfallon]

Fuck me. It is. Sorry. Thank you for giving it back.

[filthyfallon]

What?!

[emma-reed]

You most certainly do not…but considering you already paid for this coffee…I thought you might want it.

[filthyfallon]

Ah, shit. Sorry. Thank you. Rough morning. Coffee will make me less of a raging bitch...hopefully.