I fear "brainwashed" is becoming a word we use without grasping its full implications. Brainwashing is to indoctrinate someone into a very rigid set of beliefs to the point that they do not interpret reality and react to atrocities in ways that would be expected for the surrounding culture.
"is she really THAT brainwashed" yes. Even if the Caldwells are believed to be less intense than the Duggars, Kendra has been married into the Duggar family for almost a decade and she's only 28. Her entire adult life has been spent with this particularly grotesque cult.
I talk a lot about the complexity of women in these situations where they are they are both perpetrators and victims. Sometimes that can mean in certain situations they are in both roles but in this situation it's difficult for me to cast Kendra in anyway but a victim. But that doesn't mean I'm right. There's potential for an argument that she should be held accountable and is a perpetrator in this situation as well and maybe I couldn't counter that argument.
I think of the Duggar girls no longer being able to wear pajamas and having a lock on their bedroom door. Were they directly told Josh's behavior was their fault? idk, but they were told to change their actions and appearance and routine and expectations of safety in their own home. How much was Anna told she was responsible for Josh? From the age they could talk these women were told they were responsible for the purity of any man in their vicinity. They had to be on surveillance mode in pubic to make sure their brothers didn't see anything tempting. We can even take it out of the cult, we have women who are victims of domestic violence being charged with child endangerment and facing harsher punishment than the abuser.
I saw a comment about how Kendra was rumored to have the interest of Joe and one of his brothers and how the other brother is probably "glad he dodged that bullet" as though this scenario is somehow Kendra's fault.
I don't think we should never be angry at women but I think we should be aware to not be so angry at women that we forget the thumb they're under and the why behind their actions.
This isn't necessarily directed at this TTr, maybe she's made one million videos about the nuances of women in religious cults. But she seems real mad at Kendra, which again is not necessarily misplaced, but is worth looking at.
Indoctrination isn't just aesthetic or ignorance. For women it can be a removal of self, a removal from emotion, from reactions, from sense. Kendra doesn't just sound like Michelle, she sounds removed from reality. There is no passion, no worry, almost no comprehension in her voice. Even if you know better than to expect anger, there is a big lack of... anything in this conversation. And maybe its the shock still in place. But to me it reads 100% like someone going through the paces, knowing the expectations of their role.
anyways, sorry for going into personal essayist mode. here's some cheese to thank you for journey. 🧀
