Firegazings and Lokean Musings

29-NB-Pansexual-Xe/Xem/Xyr-My safe space to muse over and explore my relationship with the Norse god Loki. Also to ponder any interests in other deities, witchcraft, and the occult. I'm new to this, be gentle. Safety and Peace

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

11/26/2021

I took some time for myself today to watch the 2019 anime film Children of the Sea.

I….think I had a spiritual experience??? Epiphany??? Something??? While watching it.

Without spoilers, if you haven’t seen it, check it out (it’s on Netflix I believe). Not only is it possibly the most beautifully animated thing I’ve ever seen, it also poses some really interesting ideas/beliefs/philosophies about life, the world, the universe, and our place in it.

I think it came to me at a particularly opportune time because a lot of podcasts I listen to emphasize the importance of Earth Goddesses, but this film examines the oceans as our origin point. Makes me wonder why Ocean deities aren’t considered creation deities nearly as often.

[slavicafire]

I kind of feel empty and that I’ve lost touch with the gods. Do you have any tips?

go out into the night, the fog, the eeriness. find them in the threatening silence and in the darkness, or find them in the buzzing raw light of the street lamps and mad barking of dogs.

do not sleep for one night but wait until the sun is rising, and let the harsh rays seep into your weary soul. marvel at the beauty of it, the significance, the glory.

go out into the forest with only the trees as your companions and whispers as your guides. remember you’re stepping on the path of bones. with Gods, sometimes you have to get lost - even for a moment - to find them.

let music overtake you - one that reminds you of your gods - and revel it in. read and write, hum hymns and whisper secrets. let your mind wander in your sleep and your hands wander on the canvas, or paper, or skin. create, and challenge them to accept such an offering - or to destroy it.

talk with others whose hearts long for the Old Ones and in their search find directions to your own.

but remember - you are not a chalice that Gods fill, but you are a wild spring of your own. love them and search for them, but do not let that define you.

and be patient - with them and with the world, but most importantly with yourself.

[fjorn-the-skald]

Fjorn’s Hall: Learn Norse History, Literature, and Lore

Since graduating with my M.A., I’ve been working to help make academic resources more accessible (while also trying to create a career for myself as an academic). My solution so far has been to make this website, fjorns-hall.com, to provide reliable and accessible information about Norse history, literature, and lore for everyone at a fair price.

Although most of my courses and resources are behind a modest paywall (no more than $10/month), I still offer a fair amount of free content:

Lore Tome: Loki (with 14 sources & 67 entires, so far)

Academic Library (with 37 books & 43 articles, so far)

Digital Library (with 27+ resources listed, so far)

Saga Library (with 162+ translations listed, so far)

Lesson 1.1: The ‘Vikings’ (1387 words) + its lecture (10:22)

Lesson 1: Healing from Gods, Magic, and Runes (1758 words) + its lecture (12:34)

Lesson 1: Days (and the Norse Conception of Time) (1114 words) + its lecture (8:00)

Lesson 1a: The Northern Environment (749 words) + Lesson 1b: Iceland and the North Atlantic (506 words) + their lecture (8:12)

Lesson 1: What Are Land-Spirits? (1152 words) + its lecture (8:19)

Lesson 1: Sighvat’s Journey (881 words)

More free content will become available as I write more courses (since every 1st lesson is free) and create more libraries (I’m planning an Old Norse one for the near future). Nevertheless, this content takes a lot of time to prepare, so I can’t make everything free (time is precious and living is quite expensive). If you’re able to (and have the drive to learn more), then I hope you’ll be able to support the website by subscribing. If not, that’s okay! Just showing your support with a like, reblog, or follow goes a long way, too.

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

An Encounter? Maybe?

7/18/2021

I don’t even know where to begin with this but I simply have to ask for help/advice/wisdom so I’m just gonna throw paint at the wall and hope something sticks and someone with more experience than I can give their 2 cents on the matter.

The matter at hand is: Did my father meet a fae/deity/spirit/otherworldly entity?

Disclaimer I was not around for this so this is all hearsay from him, but my father isn’t the sort to embellish events or make things up.

Context: He lives way out in the country. Way, way, way out in the country, in the Appalachians in a national forest where the nearest Walmart or proper grocery store is a solid 45 minute drive. This is where I was born and raised; in the mountains and the forests and the farms and it is simply NOT an area where you just walk around. There is a single main paved road and people drive like maniacs on it, especially around our house because its the last straightaway where they can floor it for 30+ miles. (My family did take walks along the main road with our dogs when I was a child but we were literally the only people who ever did that). All traffic along the main road are cars or bikes because its simply too rural and too unsafe for your average person to walk around. 

We also have only 3 neighbors in anything resembling walking distance, 2 of which we know and recognize and one which would involve walking down a very treacherous mountain road to the main road, and then making a U turn into our property. Only other people in any remote proximity are on the other side the road, through a forest and across a river. And again, no one walks around here.

Imagine my surprise when my father tells me that a few days back when he was mowing our massive front pasture he sees someone just walking through said pasture and clearly lost. To get into the pasture you have to turn off the main road, down our long driveway, and go through a single gate. It’s the only entrance because the pasture is fenced in. So this person (Dad said referred to this person with masculine pronouns so that’s what I’ll go with), is meandering through our pasture and heading in the general direction of our neighbor’s adjoining pasture and property. 

So Dad stops him and asks how to help. This person is, according to my father, Extremely Drunk. He’s babbling and carrying on and Dad simply has no idea how to help this person so he leads him back to the driveway and points him to the road. While doing this the person is talking about how his throat is sore and then finally departs with the words

“I’ll return in the fall when the weather bothers my throat less.”

Dad just goes back to his mowing and thinks nothing of it beyond a wild story, but that is some of the most mystical stuff I’ve ever heard and I am positively bursting to know more about this encounter. 

Unfortunately I can’t really get more from my father; he wasn’t very descriptive of this person and, more importantly, is a staunch atheist, so it’s not like I can go to him and say “Hey I think you had an Encounter, please tell me more!”

So, what do y’all think? I talked with a friend who is also Pagan and at the very least we think that was a very mystical drunk, but could they have been someone or something more? 

Any advice on what I should do about that whole “Return in the fall” bit?

Any insight is greatly appreciated! Thank you for listening!

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Sign the Petition

Stop Disney Trademarking The Names of Norse Gods

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

Well That Just Happened

5/27/2021

So I either don’t have a fantastic godphone or I’m still new enough with all this that my intuition isn’t great.

Either way, I very, very rarely get clear vibes/feels/communication from Loki.

I just did.

Background: I have been struggling for ages to “see” how Loki looks to me. I love the common interpretation of a fiery redhead but, I dunno, it doesn’t feel just right to me.

More background: I’m also a furry, have been since I was a preteen but only really became comfortable with it in college, thanks to my then-boyfriend-now-husband. About two years ago I commissioned a fursuit of one of my fursonas, Vyski. She’s a Norse-themed arctic fox (in the spring-autumn pelt phase to be specific). I made her ages ago when I was just into norse history, culture, etc. This was way, way before I realized that was part of my Path and that I’m pagan, Lokean, and so on. 

(In case you were wondering where the Vyski part of my username came from, it’s this fursona. I also use this name at SCA events.)

Well life and a pandemic happened and my maker had to keep delaying my commission. Today I got the update that she has been working on it and that she’d be able to make our previously agreed on late-July deadline for a medieval event my husband and I will be attending. He has a red fox fursuit by the same maker, and regularly wears it to medieval events since it’s realistic in style and looks amazing with garb. (Mine will be in the same style).

I responded to my maker enthusiastically, and then thought to myself “Wow, I’m finally going to have physical proof of this piece of myself!”

And it happened. I felt Loki take extremely direct interest in this fursona, and the whole idea of anthros (animal-human hybrids), basically say, “Interesting” and now I am very much seeing them as an anthro fox person. 

Damn, though, it suits Loki well.

[skaldish]

The fact the Norse god Loki is loved by the outcasts and marginalized and hated by those who benefit from the status quo is so indicative of his nature it’s exquisite.

[babypetals]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CA0jNxon4Oq/

[glorioustidalwavedefendor]

@theiceandbones

Snow!!!!

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

6/24/2020

I think Hades may be trying to reach out to me. I think.

I’m just starting to notice signs, and last night may have been a bigger push?

Here’s what I’ve got:

- I’ve been yearning for a mint plant for my house for some weeks now. There’s some growing across our alleyway but that’s technically growing in our neighbors yard (through the fence) so I feel weird going and taking leaves. While visiting my father I learned we have an abundance of lemon balm growing and I want to transplant some at my house. Lo and behold, lemon balm is in the mint family. (Mint is a plant connected to Hades)

- The song “Coin for the Ferryman” by Nickelback (I know) has been on repeat in my head for like 2 days. (the song is about doing stupid shit and how if they die doing it they’ll need the coin to pay Charon to cross the Styx)

- I bought a vintage collapsible shot glass with a lovely narcissus flower engraved on the lid. I planned on dedicating it to Loki but it turns out the Narcissus is one of Hades’ (and Persephone’s) major flowers

- Sudden, intense yearning for a copy of World of Darkness’s Geist: the Sin-Eaters 2nd Edition (its a tabletop RPG about people who died but came back with ghost/death/otherworld entities bound to them, and has an entire companion book about the Underworld).

- The game Hades: Escape from Hell announced it’s final beta yesterday. While I haven’t played it much I adore absolutely everything about it.

- Finally, last night while meditating, I was trying to focus on Loki and spend time with Them but out of nowhere just lots of thinking about Hades and the Underworld.

(It should also be noted that I’ve pretty much always had an interest in the macabre, death, the underworld, etc. I’m currently playing a Necromancer in my DnD game, for example. I don’t think these factor into my current “signs” but well, I’ve always had an affinity for things Hades is connected to, and I’ve always quite liked his mythos).

……So I think there might be something? Signs are showing up like they did when Loki reached out to me, but also different. When I was researching Loki when I thought I was getting signs, all the stuff I read about Them here on tumblr (the lokean tag specifically), just set me ablaze with wonder and pride and it just all felt so right.

When reading stuff on here about Hades, I very much want to know more, but there isn’t this like, fiery thirst to read and know more. There’s this quiet strength and almost serenity. Like, I still wanna know more but not with as much….energy, as Loki information presented. (Hope this makes sense?)

I guess the difference in the related energies/approaches makes sense, Loki and Hades are very different deities.

I guess that, if anything is going on, and Hades is really trying to connect to me— can I really handle working with two deities? Loki knows I’m not the most dutiful follower. I’m still getting to the point where I can remember to say “Good morning” every morning or even talk to Them regularly.

I’m worried I’d end up wasting both of their times.

I’d appreciate any thoughts/advice on what’s going on. If you have your own pantheon, how did you figure out how to make time/have the energy for everyone? Especially if your gods come from different pantheons.

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

It’s past midnight in my time zone so I can officially say: Happy Father’s Day Loki!

My own personal relationship with Loki isn’t Father/Child but nonetheless They are certainly a father to many, and in some ways a father to us all.

I hope Loki gets a lot of love and joy from all their kids today.

Here’s to you, Loki ✨

[hrafna-morningstar-deactivated2]

This is beautiful

[llovinghome]

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

Nothing like purifying your room, telling all malevolent entities to scram, and having a wasp immediately make its presence known.

Pretty sure wasps are one of the most tangible examples of malevolent entities out there, so I call this a win

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

I want to figure out a bit of my day where I can set aside time to spend time with Loki, or at least make an offering to him. I assumed my morning coffee would be my best time/offering, but I think I might be too drowsy to remember to do it. I’m on autopilot for at least the first hour of consciousness.

I want it to be while performing an act i do everyday, to ritualize it, but so far the coffee is all I can think of. Maybe talking with Loki every morning will motivate me to well, wake up faster.

(I’m totally open to suggestions if anyone has better ideas for daily Loki time)

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

Life Less Ordinary

“The night you came into my life Well, it took the bones of me Took the bones of me. You blew away my storm and strife And shook the bones of me Shook the bones of me”

- Life Less Ordinary, Carbon Leaf

Ever since I started looking into Lokeanism over a year ago, I noticed how comfortable Lokeans are with talking about themselves in the tag, sharing themselves and their experiences. I figures, since I’m starting this blog to parse my own relationship with Loki, that it’d be appropriate to talk about myself a bit, and well, to start with the beginning.

So, greetings everyone. You can call me Vyski, Jay, or JD. I’m a 28yo non-binary(or gender fluid? idk) non-professional artist, professional historian. My favorite pronouns are Xe/Xem/Xyr, but They/Them is fine too. Honestly I’ll accept any pronoun. I’ve been married almost a year, and we live with three of our friends from college in a pretty ramshackle house outside Washington, DC. I also have a precious 8yo Corgi!

As far as interests, I love sewing and embroidery, playing video games (horror and action RPGs are my favorites), watching anime, and studying both folklore and fandom. I also collect both resin and vinyl ball-jointed dolls. Oh, and I’m a furry. 

Loki came into my life kind of like a tidal wave. Starting as a ripple, a mention, an interest in Marvel’s Loki, then an increasing magnitude. I attend a major SCA event (Pennsic) and I felt a connection to the norse traditions there. God of War’s portrayal of Loki I latched on to….sudden urges to name my favorite doll Loki or some variation. I found great joy in learning about Loki’s queerness. It all culminated a year ago last May, when I heard the Carbon Leaf song in my head and felt a connection to Loki so strongly I was left shivering and crying.

So, I reached out to them, and they reached back. Since then I’ve tried to forge a relationship with Loki, but without much success. Which brings me to the reason behind this blog.

I am not religious or spiritual. My parents, having been raised in Christian families, both went agnostic/atheist as adults, and raised me as such. In the retrospect they chose a pretty awful place to raise a child as agnostic. Despite being outside of the Deep South, the part of Virginia I grew up in is horrendously Bible Belt conservative. Hell, bible study was a weekly event at my elementary school (in a trailer just far enough off school property for it to not be a crime). I was ostracized and actively bullied because I wasn’t Christian.

Suffice to say I quite abhorred Christianity for most of my life, and stayed away from all organized religion as a cautionary measure. I’ve since matured enough to recognize that just because I was treated like shit by Christians doesn’t mean all of them are bad, and just because religion or spirituality wasn’t for me didn’t make it inherently bad. And for a long time that’s how things have been.

But, after exploring the various paganism and witchcraft tags here on tumblr and well, feeling an attraction to it, I began to seriously consider if I could follow a deity, and Loki found me. And I’ve kinda been floundering in it.

I just never feel like I know what I’m doing—how do I pray? how do I make offerings? how to i cast a circle? how do I purify my space? how do I talk to my god(s)? how do I know they’re listening? how do I know they’re real?

I’ve tried off and on to talk more earnestly to Loki, and I’m certain my lack of consistency and insecurity wore on them. Finally I caved and asked for an outside source to communicate with Loki on my behalf, to ask if they really even wanted this, and what I needed to do. 

I was told that yes, Loki wanted me, and that I should get creative. Honestly I could have cried. Loki wants me. They care about me! And I can take my own approach. I can forge my own path and my own relationship with my deity. It feels both scary and incredible to say that.

So here we are. I’m going to use this blog hopefully as a space to share and reflect on my experiences, and to make myself comfortable with the fact that I have found a deity, and that I am in fact, a Lokean. I have no idea how to tell my husband or friends or family, but hopefully, through this blog and with Loki, I’ll figure that out.

I had hoped that a year ago was my real starting point on this journey, but it seems I needed more time to become comfortable with the notion. 

Here’s to the real beginning of a new journey.

[lokisfavoritemidgardian]

How did you came up that he really want you? Anyway Iam happy for you that he loves you. Iam still not sure what kind of relationship I have with him or even if I ever have one or will have…… I have so much incredible doubts…

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

Hello! Thank you so much for your kind words, they mean a lot to me! I’ll be completely honest, I asked someone with more skill/ more experience/a more functional godphone to speak to Loki on my behalf. So admittedly I’m kinda taking their word for it, but what they told me felt right, so I’m rolling with it. 

I completely understand and sympathize with you about doubts. When I first reached out to Loki a year ago everything felt so clear, but then....communication felt harder, like I wasn’t getting responses. I began to doubt if it was right or if I was even talking to Loki. Reaching out to someone else was very much an act of desperation because I couldn't figure out how else to get a clear answer. I’m really really bad about reaching out for help, but in doing so a huge amount of stress and anxiety has lifted from me.

I super don’t know what I’m doing, so I’m probably not the best source for guidance or how to rid yourself of lingering doubts, but I sincerely believe you’ll work through it and find a relationship with Loki that works for you both!

[flame-and-vyski-tricks]

I have no idea what I’m doing, but what I’m doing feels right.

That’s good enough for me.

[mythandwords]

Said every Lokean ever