i am the storm

assorted archival interests | current obsessions - critical role · BTS · Sarah J Maas Imogen Temult speaks to my soul. Laura Bailey truly gets me. photos from Max Beech & @annadrawsstuff

[number-one-castiel-apologist]

“Why are you watching it again? You already know what happens.” Because The Character is in there, bro. THE CHARACTER

[noknowshame]

I know we’re all like lawless nonconformists but you really can’t be texting and driving. that’s one of the ones you’ve gotta listen to for real

[whyenn-reader]

Not to go "if you have ADHD just go for a run" or anything, but I am so serious if you have ADHD you should regularly go outside, no headphones no phone no nothing and just stand and observe for a while until you've had enough. Not until you get bored, until you've had enough. Drink your coffee without watching tiktok. Have a bath without music. Turn down the volume in your headphones. I cannot overstate how much learning to be bored is cruicial with ADHD. Life is not just about pleasure, no matter what your dysregulated dopamine system thinks, and when you teach your brain to be okay with being bored, then boring tasks stop feeling like torture. By letting yourself be bored you are yoinking your system out of the high/low binary and allow for the highs to feel like actual highs and not just anything that isn't low. I am so serious go literally touch grass. Listen to the sounds in your flat. Stimulate your body the way it was designed. It lowers anxiety and makes you feel like you're real and best of all it's completely free

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I really wish more ADHD mental health care told you WHY things like this matter to our quality of life.

The Hyperactivity in Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is NOT about being physically hyperactive, it's about having a "hyperactive central nervous system" because it's a form of inheritable dysautonomia. The problem with disautonomia, especially the ADHD kind, is that it makes boredom flag to your nervous system as a THREAT, triggering hyperactive and maladaptive central nervous system processes like fight or flight.

But dysautonomia kills you that way. Literally, part of the reason our average life spand increase on stimulents is that it helps manage risk-taking impulsivity that can get us killed by accident, but the other part is that stimulents can regulate a hyperactive CNS such that it is functionally (while impacted by the stimulent) NOT dysregulated anymore. And PHYSIOLOGICALLY that is essential because the physical outcomes of dysautonomia can reduce your life span by YEARS if not decades through self-perpetuating hypervigelence, endocrine disruption, and adrenal fatigue.

So when the ADHD brain goes stimulation-seeking and a doctor tells you to practice mindfulness, it feels like being told "hey go stand in a functioning boiler until you can stop thinking" rather than WHAT IT IS which is the process of re-teaching your body what is and isn't safe.

Standing outside making mindful, non-interpretive/moralized observation of the world helps your brain and body re-acclimate to the idea that absence of that frantic "busy" feeling isn't a threat or a risk to your safety, and gradually reduces the level of distress that just hanging out somewhere triggers for you.

Learning WHY this stuff was being suggested and understanding what it was actually supposed to do went a long way towards changing my relationship with my ADHD. I am FAR more functional now, far less prone to shame spirals and rejection sensitivity, hell, I can **sit physically still for near on an hour at a time** now without feeling like I'm going to crawl out of my skin.

So yeah. Go outside. Let the world narrow around you and take deep breaths until it stops feeling claustrophobic or like you need to climb walls. Learn how to let little sensations become big ones like the way the heat of the sun on your skin starts as a gentle warming and be omes a unique collection of sensory moments depending on how it lands on you. Listen for sounds under sounds and let them fade in and out as you move your focus from one sound to the next. Enjoy. Move on. Rinse and repeat.

When you no longer feel like the world is actively killing you, it's a lot easier to navigate it.

[whyenn-reader]

S++ tier addition to the post, thank you tumblr user butts bouncing on the beltway

[lifeafterpsychiatry]

"No one remembered my birthday-" Well, but did YOU tell anyone it was coming up and you wanted to celebrate it with them?

"I wish someone would see through it when I tell people I'm fine-" Well, but have YOU considered not lying when people ask you how you're doing?

"I am so resentful of my friend because they keep doing this thing that really bothers me-" Well, but have YOU directly communicated that the thing is bothering you?

"I am burning out because my friend keeps expecting me to help them with serious struggles-" Well, but have YOU tried to establish the boundaries you need to feel okay?

"No one ever asks me about this thing I really care about-" Well, but have YOU brought it up yourself?

"I miss my friend but they haven't texted me-" Well, but have YOU been reaching out to them?

Sometimes people are mean, uncaring assholes, in which case you get to be mad. But sometimes you just need to communicate better. Try communication before you assume someone doesn't care!

[snipertrifle]

Having someone who knows you on such a deep level that they see past your mask, or sense you need a check in is such a deep satisfying fantasy. It's up there with living in a cottagecore farm, or buying all your friends houses when you win the lottery. But you have to make peace with the fact that this is also a fantasy. It is unfair to expect people to "just know" when to respect your boundaries or to push them.

Being cared for is not a fantasy. But you have to let people know you need it. And you have to understand that sometimes they will let you down. Just like you totally could live in a cute farm, but you still have to shovel shit, and the crops sometimes die anyway. Or maybe you win the lottery, but you still have to manage your money and learn real estate law.

The fantasy isn't the caring, the fantasy is not having to do the work. And it sucks. It's embarrassing. But like the meme says, it's not rotten if it's YOU. So do it for yourself.

[lifeafterpsychiatry]

"The fantasy isn't the caring, the fantasy is not having to do the work"! Thank you for that addition. Because it's not a naive expectation to want someone to care to treat you right. But it requires communication and mutual effort to actually get there

[pianjeong]

come on brain yip yip

[bob-artist]

Brotherhood of The Orb

[bob-artist]

[shane-ilya]

HEATED RIVALRY — 105, I'll Believe In Anything

[romanceslasher]

#buttheavy

[dailyhollanov]

Ilya + crying

[shane-ilya]

hudson williams the first person on buzzfeed thirst tweets to out-freak the tweets (x)

BONUS:

[flodaya]

it's about being rewarded by the narrative (1/∞)

[littlegirlinvisible]

# ILYA ROZANOV IS A COMEDIAN  

CONNOR STORRIE as ILYA ROZANOV HEATED RIVALRY (2025—)

[littlegirlinvisible]

HEATED RIVALRY 1.06: THE COTTAGE + HRTwT VERSION

[firstprinced]

I would like to relax with you. For once.

[evanzbuck]

Ilya felt like his smile was going to split his face. He was overwhelmingly happy. Shane was beaming up at him, eyes bright and freckles crinkled, and Ilya loved him. And Shane loved him. Holy fucking shit. Shane Hollander is in love with me.

[yrsonpurpose]

Do you want that problem to go away? I don't ever want that problem to ever go away.

[firstprinced]

Like an angry kitten.