go boi, exercise that tongue

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go boi, exercise that tongue
rossbutler I make a lotta weird faces when I make music, I get it. Haven’t sang/guitared for a while, needed a break from the saxophone
Vertigo (1958) dir. Alfred Hitchcock
Dust is us
When you are too obsessed into something, albeit people or things, and you are still conscious enough to realize that it has no good towards you.
You should try to pull yourself out from the big picture, we as human who are born with thoughts and emotions sometimes can’t help but to feel, can’t help but to react to something that you didn’t intend to.
Try to imagine a picture in your head, then pull yourself to stand outside of the picture and look at it. Look at the timeline of your life, look at what you have done so far and how far more to go.
Ask yourself, does it worth your time to be so obsessed to something that leads you nowhere but you are somehow controlled by it, being affected by it, being forced to feel something that you don’t want to feel when you have the choice to be awake, to see the real you.
The most important thing in life is to be able to jump out from a situation you are in, and be able to see if what you are doing is acceptable, or if it is want you really want to see yourself doing.
Thoughts origin: Very much obsessed with an actor, to the extend of stalking him and constantly imagining myself being married to him (ridiculous), try to pick up everything that he likes, know what movies he’s been in, analyze his ex girlfriends to see what we have in common or what can be done to look more like them. These gestures may look scary but that’s what in the fans’ thoughts everyday.
in therapy my therapist and i were talking about my own feelings of self worth in relationships. and she asked me to say qualities about myself that someone else would be attracted to, on a romantic and platonic level. so i named some things like compassionate, empathetic, etc. and she said “you named things that you can give someone. ways you can serve, rather than ways that you are” and y'all..my mind was blown that’s gonna stick with me forever like she then proceed to tell me actual innate qualities about myself that she liked and thought anyone else would like as well and i hadn’t even considered those because like she said i was focused on things i could do outwardly to attract and maintain connections rather than who i was as a person..goddamn!!! thats tea!!!
With this in mind, this also makes me think of the ways people describe us. When people say the reasons that they love/like you or describe you as a person, are they only naming ways that you serve them? Are they equating your worth with how much you do for them?
ex. “You’re such a good listener. You’re so generous, you’re so compassionate. You’re always there for me. You always hold me down. You’re reliable”
vs.
“You’re so funny! You’re very vibrant. You’re creative, passionate, and intelligent. You’re optimistic. You’re so talented at ____” , etc. I think that’s very telling.
This FUCKED relationships up too because once this hit me, I realized people can just be in love with the way you make them feel instead of who you actually are. ALWAYS pay attention to the last little “vs” but there because it IS super telling
me: let me put on lipstick
boy: oh…I don’t like lipstick on girls
me:
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