Author's Notes: Hello? I know. I know--earlier in the year I said I was back. Sadly, I was not. I have not felt like myself over the last few months, and I still do not. Immigration is such a funny thing. I'm still trying to find myself in this new life, in a new country. The hostility in this world is wearing me down, but I'm learning to keep going. Wish me luck as I navigate life and get my groove going.
Anyway...here's a fic. This is not a TimRae story. I'm sorry. I'm working on getting back to my stories and finishing them, I promise. I've recently discovered BuckLena after watching Thunderbolts. I thought it'd be fun to write something new and ease myself back into writing. I know my following here is mostly TimRae, and I totally understand if this is not your thing. It's been years since I wrote last, so let me know what you think.
Onwards...
----
Chapter 1
Their Ohio home looked neglected, a shadow of what once was the perfect image of a middle-class American home of the 90s.
The front lawn was terribly overgrown, eaves hung dangerously from the ceiling, and all windows were boarded up. The brown and white exterior paint had long since yellowed from the elements, and the wooden panels looked chipped and aged.
The floorboards creaked dangerously as Yelena stopped on the front porch. She frowned at the sound and ignored how her floor sagged underneath her boots. She sniffed and squashed the blossoming ache in her chest as distant memories of long summer nights spent on the front porch crept up on her.
She hugged the grey box closer to her chest with her left arm like an anchor and fished for her keys in her black messenger bag. After blindly rooting through her bag, Yelena finally found her keys and, with some effort—the doorknob was rusty, like everything was—she unlocked the door and roughly shouldered her way through. The door creaked loudly in protest.
Yelena kicked the door closed behind her; the noise echoed loudly through the empty home. For a moment, Yelena stood in the hallway and just stared at everything and nothing.
Everything was in a complete disarray—drawers pulled open, memoirs from her childhood strewn all over the place, rooms thoroughly raided, and nothing was where she remembered things to be. After their “big adventure” years ago, SHIELD had swept through the home and took everything they deemed of interest to the Red Room investigation. They left nothing but garbage and distant memories behind.
Yelena sucked in a shuddering breath—stubbornly ignoring the waves of emotions that swept through her. She watched as dust particles danced in the afternoon sunlight that crept through the cracks of the boarded-up windows. The little specs landed gracefully on the living room floor among memories long forgotten.
With a soft huff, Yelena carefully made her way into the small kitchen-dining room. Plates from their last meal were still on the table—everything had turned into dust and mold. Carefully navigating over upturned chairs, she pushed the dirty old plates to the side and dropped the grey box onto the table. Dust billowed into the air, and Yelena frowned as she surveyed the sorry state of the place. It was hard to believe this was once her home—a place she thought she had happy memories in.
Yelena was tired. Her muscles ached from sitting in the bus for hours and not moving. She barely slept since leaving New York two days ago. She refused to sleep—memories from a life that she’d rather forget would come barreling into her dreams and consume her whole. Yelena thought she’d be over these dreams now, but things seemed to have taken a sharp turn as of late.
She gave the grey box a sour glance.
“Okay,” Yelena breathed, tearing her gaze away from the box and once again surveying the chaos of the place that she once called home. Time to clean.
Yelena methodically set to work—filling garbage bags, righting chairs, fixing the couch, kicking old books and knick-knacks off to the side. It took over a day to make the house remotely livable. She barely had the heart to fix everything, because what was the point?
She worked through the nights. There was no power, which was cut off likely days after their disappearance. By some miracle, there was running water. That was a small blessing to help her clean counters and handwash whatever bed sheets she could find.
On her second day of living in her rundown old home, Yelena finally managed to get the power working thanks to an old generator in their garage. Yelena sat on her haunches and watched the generator sputter to life after refilling it with gasoline. She observed her old home flood with lights. It looked even sadder with the lights on.
Walking the old streets of her neighborhood felt strange. Yelena stuffed her hands into the pockets of her bright yellow jacket and surveyed the homes that surrounded her. They looked different—more modern with new families. The family-run corner store she and Natasha used to frequent was long gone, replaced with a more modern supermarket. Nothing looked the same, and it made her heart ache.
One thing that did not change was the forest on the edge of their property. While the trees grew over time, the small opening to the forest looked the same. Yelena stared at the forest one evening, fists curled tightly into her pockets as fireflies began to dance in the trees like ghosts. Bioluminescence, Melina’s voice whispered.
Yelena bitterly scoffed at the memory. What a fucking joke, she thought. Sparing a quick glance at the playground behind her, she watched the swing creak in the warm summer breeze. The playground looked used. Yelena found solace in the idea that children were able to make memories—real childhood memories—in this place.
By her third night, her fridge was filled with beer and vodka. Mac and cheese boxes littered the kitchen counter. Dinner was vodka, mac and cheese, and a delirious amount of hot sauce. She walked past the old dining table, spared the unopened grey box a glance, before heading into the living room and dropping into the family's old couch. Turning on the old television, Yelena switched to a rerun of FRIENDS and turned up the volume, determined to ignore the ghosts that haunted the halls of her old home.
Yelena spent her fourth day drinking, stubbornly refusing to give her mind some sense of clarity. She allowed herself to aimlessly wander through her old home, riffling through books that SHIELD had left behind, and saw no value in their investigation. She found a few old tapes that had fallen behind one of the bookshelves during the raid—they were video recordings of her and Natasha’s recitals (ballet, piano, singing, Yelena’s pre-school class production of some silly nursery rhymes). The sight of the clunky old tapes made her stomach churn and her head swim. It was probably the vodka.
On her fifth night, the grey box had migrated into the living room and settled on the small coffee table. The VCR tapes were stacked beside it. Yelena curled into a small ball and cradled the cold bottle of beer close to her chest. Joey and Chandler were arguing on screen, their squabble a welcome distraction as the ghosts of her past continued to haunt her. Green eyes slid back to the grey box; the light from the television wrapped the box in a soft, eerie light. The lights flickered, and shadows around the box danced, taunting.
Her resolve to ignore the ghosts of her past broke on her seventh night. She found a picture of Natasha and herself, young and blissfully unaware of the lies around them, carefully hidden in the corner of their childhood bed they shared. It was stupid for her to look around their old room without opening Pandora’s box.
Her vision blurred as she allowed an all-consuming sadness to just wash over her. Yelena choked on a sob and stumbled back into the living room; childhood picture clutched tightly to her chest. Perhaps it was the alcohol, perhaps it was the deafening rush of emotions, or perhaps it was the ghosts of her past wrapping her in a tight, chilling embrace—Yelena’s resolve broke, and she popped one of her old piano recital videos into the VCR. Out of tune lullabies filled the air, and with a soft sob, Yelena finally opened the grey box and pulled out files and notes of her past she would rather forget.
That night, Yelena allowed the ghosts of her past to haunt her again—they whispered angrily into her ears, clawed at her skin, and burrowed deeply into her soul. Sobs racked her body as the papers from the box slipped through her trembling fingers. Yelena curled into herself, tired and desperately trying to anchor herself.
A series of sharp knocks cut through the soft piano lullabies and her sobs. Curling tighter into herself, Yelena ignored the knocking, and she blankly stared at the papers around her.
“Yelena?”
The knocking intensified, followed by the sharp jiggling sound of a doorknob turning. The door finally burst open, and Yelena pressed her eyes closed, wishing to just disappear and for everything to just stop. Could she not just cry and spiral in peace?
“Lena?”
A hand gently pressed into her shoulder. “Hey.”
Yelena jolted at the touch and drew in a sharp gasp. Her eyes flew open, and she stared at the concerned face of Bucky. She whimpered and watched Bucky crouch over her. His brows furrow deeper in concern, taking in her distressed state. She felt his fingers gently curl into her shoulder, trying to anchor her and keep her from spiraling any further.
“Bucky...”
At her hysterical sob, Bucky sighed softly and gently gathered her into a hug. “It’s okay,” he whispered into her hair, listening to the sobs rack through her body. “It’s okay,” he mumbled, voice laced with worry as he rubbed her back and stared in complete shock at the papers around them.
Red Room reports. Yelena’s reports.
He glanced at the box and stared sadly at the Black Widow insignia.
Additional notes: If you liked this story, you can also view it on AO3. I'd appreciate a comment--or a hug. :)
I miss you all, fam.
Where The Notes Fade - Chapter 1 - FlyingKiki - Multifandom [Archive of Our Own]
I think i’m looking forward to seeing updates on “Ours” more than anything! Only because it’s so different than any other Tim/Rae story out there. So glad you’re back! Hope you’ve been well and congrats on getting married!!
Ahhhh!! I've been obsessing over "Ours" for the last couple of days! I have scenes mentally noted--how his daughter first meets Tim, how Tim tells Bruce and Alfred, and how things go down when she meets her Uncles and Aunt! 🥺 Plus, all those feelings between Tim and Raven --- and maybe Stephanie?? 👀
hiii i know you haven’t updated in two years but i just wanted to reach out and say i still read all your works on ao3. it’s so beautifully written and it makes me love and appreciate a couple i never thought i’d ship.
Aww. Hiiii. Thank you.
I absolutely love TimRae. I also did not think I'd ship them. But there is just something so interesting, dark, and shared in their characters and experiences that makes them so fun to pair and get them into fun (smutty) situations.
I'm excited to hop on the TimRae ship again and get this steamboat (lol) going. ❤️🔥❤️🔥
I have a few ideas for my stories but let me know if there is any update you'd like me to get out first.
Orrr, if you have any shorts request, smutty or not, let me know. Just drop off your prompts.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
COME BACK ( only if you want to ) the world needs you !!!! We need playing dangerously ( idk if I said it right I’m tired) hope all is well
I'm back? Hi? Eeep. 🥹🫠
Hello, Hi! I'm back. Kind of. I think. I hope. I want to be back.
I've been getting a lot of messages and comments to my old stories. I LOVE YOU ALL!! GAAH. you've been lovely. And patient and just so, so kind.💜
I miss writing #TimRae stories, and I absolutely miss these two idiots and their smutty shenanigans. I'm hoping to update my stories in the next coming weeks. Thank you for being so patient.
I miss you all.
Time to get some TimRae action going. ❤️🔥
Life update, skip if you like. LOL
A lot had happened since my last update in 2022? (WOW. 2022? WTF.) I'm sorry. It's been a roller-coaster of madness, sadness, happiness, and idontknowhat. Adulting is hard, man. Recently moved from the tropics to the frozen tundras of Canada with our dog, and it's been a wild move. Got married a couple of months ago and just taking a few months off from everything while my nerves continue to sizzle in the background.
Absolutely annoyed the hell out of him. And, honestly, Tim wasn’t even sure why she annoyed him. For the most part, she kept to herself - either quietly taking notes in their two classes together, or staring out of the window, looking off into the distance. Even when she did talk, it was to ask a usually ask a poignant question, or make a point the professor wanted the class to learn. She was smart, observant, and unnerving. There was something about the way Raven looked at him that set Tim’s entire body on edge. It wasn’t so much like she was checking him out - like some of the other girls on campus - but that she could see into him. Past the designer clothes and dimples, like she was trying to pull apart his entire being and then piece him back together with better understanding.
And sometimes it was as though she somehow knew that he wasn’t entirely what he seemed, or what he claimed to be.
*crawls out from the cave I've been hibernating in* I've been gone for so long. 🫠 moved countries, bouts of sadness, started a new life, got married(!!!!). longer explanation in the days to come.
I've been on a Tim/Rae binge the last couple of days, consuming anything timrae to get me back on my feet. It's been ages, buuuut I'm still hopeful this gets a reboot. This beautiful fic by @xaphrin first made my tim/Rae heart jump
The three sidekicks and Raven cowered behind a makeshift barrier as the laser fire intensified. "Good idea," Kate said to Dick, her tone tense but impressed, "using the mirrors to deflect the lasers."
"Hopefully, I'll have hacked B's system before our fortress falls apart," Dick muttered, his fingers flying over the device in front of him.
Stephanie exhaled loudly, clearly frustrated. "We don't have time for this. Every second we're stuck here is another second Tim doesn't have. We don't even know where he is."
"Tracker?" Kate asked, eyes flicking to Dick.
Dick shook his head. "As long as the Batcave is in defense mode, we won't be able to access the tracking system."
Raven closed her eyes for a moment, her brow furrowed in concentration. "I may have a way to locate Tim," she said quietly, uncertain. "But I haven't done it before, so…" The young, mute girl—Raven had yet to learn her name—reached out and gently grasped Raven's hand. Raven glanced at her, and though the girl couldn't speak, Raven understood her unspoken plea. She nodded. "Okay," Raven replied softly. She crossed her legs, sat in a meditative position, and placed her hands on the floor. "Just… don't freak out," she warned the others, "and protect my body." Raven took a long breath, steadying herself, and then exhaled. She repeated the action, centering her focus, before softly chanting. "Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos. Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos. Azarath. Metrion. Zinthos." Her voice trailed off as her astral form slipped free. She opened all four of her eyes and searched.
Raven's powers expanded over Gotham, stretching across the city's landscape as she fought to keep control over her demonic side. She felt the chaotic swirl of countless minds as she briefly connected to each one. She pushed herself further and harder. Come on, Tim. Where are you? Then she spotted him—a figure slamming his fists against the walls of a building. It was a familiar place, just across from the library she had visited a few weeks ago. Tim, she relaxed just a little. She steered her powers toward him. "Tim," she whispered in his mind, startling the vigilante. She did a quicky, cursory glance of his body. He looked awful. His Red Robin uniform was incomplete, with only a cape, mask, red spandex, and utility belt in place, but missing gloves, boots, and various other accessories. His hair was a mess, his face pale and sweaty, his breathing labored, and his right hand hung limp at his side, clearly broken. "Tim," she repeated gently, her voice reaching into his mind. "I don't know what's going on, but you're hurt. You need to come back to the cave."
"I can't," Tim replied aloud, his stance rigid. "It's the Joker. I have to stop him."
"The Joker is dead," Raven insisted, echoing what Richard told her.
"But I see him everywhere," Tim's voice cracked, his words trembling with exhaustion. "No one else sees him, but I do. He's here. He's alive."
Raven hesitated for a moment before speaking. "Then let me see him… through your eyes."
"What?"
"Let me in, Tim. Let me see what you're seeing."
Tim lowered his head, sinking to his knees, too tired to resist anymore. "Okay," he muttered, "I'll let you in." As soon as his mental defenses dropped, Raven slipped into his mind. Her breath caught in her throat. Holy crap! Tim wasn't just in awful shape—he was dying. She experienced it as if her own body was deteriorating. The pain was sharp and immediate, threatening to overwhelm her.
Focusing herself, Raven pushed past the agony and connected with his psyche. "Look," she said, guiding his gaze as she turned his head from side to side. "There's no one here, Tim. You're alone. There's no—JOKER!" Raven screamed as a dark figure punched her in the jaw, knocking her soul back into her own body. Her eyes snapped open as she found herself back in the Batcave.
"Raven?" Stephanie was at her side in an instant. "What happened? Are you okay?"
"The Joker… he's real," Raven panted. "At least, real to Tim. He's hallucinating, but… Tim's in bad shape. He's dying."
"Victor was supposed to bring medicine," Kate said, her frustration clear. "But the Zeta tube isn't working with the cave in lockdown mode."
"I'm doing my best," Dick called out from where he was working on the system.
Raven sat up, shaking off the disorientation. "I know where Tim is," she said firmly. "I can get to him."
"Then go!" Stephanie urged her.
"We've got this covered," Kate added, glancing at the others. Raven nodded, took a steadying breath, and then disappeared into a portal.
Red Robin's breath came in ragged gasps as he stood, swaying, on the rooftop. His body ached—his shattered hand throbbed with every beat of his heart, and his head was a chaotic storm of fear and fatigue. He'd been fighting for hours, or maybe days. He'd lost track. The Joker's voice echoed in his skull, relentless, mocking him. "You're cracking, kid," the Joker's voice whispered from the shadows. "No one's coming to save you. You're all alone."
I know, Red Robin thought, despair settling into his bones. He wasn't sure how much longer he could keep fighting. His vision blurred, and for a brief, desperate moment, he thought he felt Raven's presence. "Raven," he gasped, hope flickering weakly within. "Raven?" He spun around, searching for her, but the rooftop was empty.
"She's not here," came the sickeningly gleeful voice. The Joker materialized out of the darkness, smiling malevolently. "It's just you," he said, swinging the crowbar, "and me." The crowbar cracked against Red Robin's ribs with brutal force, and he staggered, choking on the pain. Before he could catch his breath, the Joker swung again, hitting him squarely in the back. Red Robin collapsed, bracing himself on his hands and knees, his body trembling in pain. "Ha ha ha!" The Joker laughed maniacally as he danced around Red Robin's crumpling form.
It's over, Red Robin thought. I can't do this anymore. The Joker's boot slammed down on his back, forcing him to the ground. Red Robin groaned as his chest hit the cold concrete, every breath a struggle. "Joker…" he moaned, the fight draining out of him. "Stop."
The Joker's grin widened, and Red Robin felt his breath against his ear, a vile, twisted imitation of intimacy. "Ha. Ha. Ha," the Joker whispered, his weight pressing down on Tim's back, suffocating him.
And then… nothing. The weight was gone. The Joker vanished, leaving only the echo of his laughter.
Tim's body went limp, defeated. He felt cold and hopelessly alone. This is it, he thought. Maybe I should just… let go.
"Tim? Tim?"
The voice was soft, familiar—impossibly gentle amidst the chaos. He felt hands touch the back of his neck, grounding him. Warm hands. Real.
"Tim," the calm voice said again, cutting through the fog of his mind. "I'm so sorry about this."
Raven.
He blinked, struggling to focus as her presence enveloped him. Sudden relief flooded his chest. He wasn't alone anymore. "Raven…" he gasped. She was real, and she was here.
Raven couldn't believe she was about to form a bond, but…desperate times and all that. The bond would remain intact only until Tim was fully healed. Placing her hands softly on his head and back, she let her essence flow into him, linking her mind and soul to his. Suddenly, she wasn't just Raven—she was Raven and Tim.
As her healing powers worked, memories from his life flooded her consciousness. His sixth birthday, the excitement of his first computer, the raw grief of losing his parents, his journey with Bruce Wayne, training, becoming Red Robin—getting captured and tortured by the Joker. Raven absorbed it all, her heart aching as she relived his deepest pain, pushing herself to heal both his body and his mind. Feeling his mental and physical wounds close, Raven felt herself separating from him, until finally, she was just Raven again.
She gasped, drawing her powers back into herself. Her eyes had been closed the entire time, and it wasn't until she heard a soft, "Raven? Raven?" that she realized they had opened. In front of her sat a healthy, thoroughly confused, half-dressed Red Robin. He looked around before his gaze settled on her. Without hesitation, he reached for her, pulling her into a tight hug. "He's gone," he gasped into her neck, his voice trembling with a mix of relief and disbelief. "He's gone." Raven, caught off guard, awkwardly patted his back, feeling the warmth of his embrace. "You… you… what did you do?" he asked, pulling back just enough to look at her.
"It's... hard to explain," Raven answered. She reached out, her hands resting on his face as she smoothed his messy hair. "Are you okay? How do you feel?"
"Better," Red Robin smiled, the weight of the past days lifting from his shoulders. He glanced around before, with a quick motion, pulled his mask off. His eyes met hers, his voice thick with emotion. "Thank you," he breathed, resting his forehead gently against hers. "Thank you," he repeated, tears edging his words. "He's gone," he tried to hold back a sob. "He's gone."
Raven's heart ached at the raw vulnerability in his voice. Reciprocating the hug, she whispered, "You never have to thank me for saving your life," she whispered.
Raven didn't know how long they stayed in each other's embrace, but she was exhausted—her body still healing itself from the strain of the bond—and freezing. She wasn't even in uniform. She was wearing a sweatshirt and leggings, and her hair was in a messy ponytail. This is embarrassing.
Tim held her a moment longer, reluctant to let go, and Raven could feel his gratitude in the way he held her. But she was freezing. She glanced at the snow falling around them, pulling her sweatshirt closer. "Are you cold?" she asked, trying to make light of the situation. "Because I'm cold."
"Hm?" Tim blinked before pulling back slightly. "Oh—oh my gosh! You must be freezing!" His gaze darted around, noticing his own missing gear. "Where are my gloves? Wait. Where are my boots?" He crawled to the edge of the roof, peering down. "Well, there's my bike," he said with a small chuckle before turning back to her. "You don't look so good. Did you… absorb my injuries?"
"Yeah," Raven replied, her smile weak but genuine, though she couldn't stop the small shiver that passed through her. Without missing a beat, Tim shrugged off his cape and wrapped it securely around her shoulders. "This should help keep you warm," he breathed, the gesture filled with a tenderness that made Raven's chest tighten. "Looks like we're stuck here for a bit."
Raven let out a small laugh. "Give me a minute. I'll have enough energy to teleport us—and your bike—back to the Batcave."
Tim sighed, a mixture of exhaustion and relief crossing his face. But then his eyes widened in realization. "Oh no—the Batcave! They're trapped, aren't they?"
"They are," Raven nodded, glancing at him with a knowing look. "Bruce's defense systems are a little… excessive."
"Yeah," Tim chuckled, "he likes to be prepared."
He held Raven's gaze, his eyes locking onto hers with an intensity that sent a flutter through her stomach. Raven turned away before standing on shaky legs, feeling her strength gradually returning. "Okay, I'm good."
"Are you sure?" Tim asked, concern clear in his voice as he followed her, sliding his mask back on.
"The sooner you get back, the sooner you can rest," she replied with a small, tired smile. "You need it."
"For once, I agree," he said with a soft chuckle, relief and gratitude shining through his fatigue.
(1/1 – 12:01 a.m.)
Raven looked out the enormous window as fireworks lit up the sky. She had finally purged all the drugs from her system and found herself staying at Wayne Manor, ushering in the New Year.
Alfred had shown up the day before, frantic and worried after receiving both Lucius and Stephanie's messages. He came immediately, even contacting Bruce, who was on his way back from wherever, though it would still take three weeks for him to reach Earth's orbit. And Tim had slept for over 40 hours straight, waking just minutes before the countdown to New Year's Day.
Now Raven sat contentedly on a window seat, watching the firework show. "Hey," she heard Tim say. She turned to see him standing there, sheepish, holding two giant mugs. Her heart skipped a beat. He looks so adorable. Barefoot, a gray T-shirt, and pajama bottoms that were a little too long but hung low on his hips in a way that made her stomach flutter. Raven felt her face warm and schooled her expression. "That's not coffee, is it?" she asked.
"Uh…no," Tim smiled, handing her a mug. "I've decided to go several days without coffee. This is decaf tea."
"Going without coffee? Are you sure you'll survive?"
"Funny, but, no, I'm not sure." He joined her on the seat, and together they watched the opulent firework display.
Raven glanced at him, captivated by the colors reflecting off his face. "Tim," she spoke hesitantly, drawing his attention. He turned his blue eyes to her, and instantly Raven felt breathless. Has he always been this handsome? "I need to tell you about how I found and healed you. I entered your mind and saw some things."
"Raven," Tim placed his hand gently over hers, his touch warm and reassuring. "It doesn't matter right now. I'm just happy to be here—alive and in my right mind. We'll talk about it later. Okay?"
"Okay," she nodded, a soft smile playing on her lips.
Tim gave her hand a light squeeze. "Happy New Year, Raven."
She looked at him, feeling a rare warmth in her chest. "Happy New Year, Tim." They sat in comfortable silence, watching the sky light up with vibrant colors.
"Ugh!" Tim grunted as he hit the ground and rolled multiple times, landing on his back. Bart screamed as he too landed next to Tim. "Is this really necessary?" Bart asked. He turned to Knowledge, Anguish, Joy, and Confidence.
"You can do it!" Joy cheered.
"Kick her ass!" Confidence shouted.
"Yes," Knowledge answered Bart's question. "This is necessary."
"Can't you help?" Bart asked desperately.
"Something feels…off," he said to Bart. "Crap!" he exclaimed as he dodged a black blast.
"What do you mean?" Bart said as he dodged the black energy Passion seemed to release in rapid fire.
"The other emotions–the way they're watching us," Tim said as he flipped out of the way.
"Stay still!" Passion shouted.
"This almost seems…planned," Tim said right before he took a blast to the stomach. "Ugh!" he grunted. That hurt, he thought, but…I'm not puking. It's almost like someone has told her not to hurt us. Tim looked at Knowledge. He saw her give Passion a slight nod. Yeah, they're definitely up to something.
"Passion," Knowledge called out, "Raven hasn't shown. You may need to hit harder."
"With glee," Passion smiled.
Raven stumbled into Constantine's mansion. "What was up with you today?" Constantine asked her. "Your head wasn't in it. You weren't concentrating. I know you're better than that."
"I don't know," Raven replied as she rubbed her head. "I've been having sporadic headaches throughout the day. It started when we entered Circe's domain, but now I'm not so sure." Raven plopped into an armchair.
"Hmm," Constantine said, "maybe you need a drink."
"I doubt that's the solution to my problem."
"Rum solves every problem."
Passion threw wave after wave of dark energy at the two heroes. Okay, Tim thought as he ducked and dodged while Bart zipped out of the way, she may be trying to kill us. Passion uttered a bunch of words in an alien language as she lifted her arms. Black spikes shot up, turning the ground into a minefield. Tim had to remain light on his feet to avoid being pierced. Raven doesn't like close combat. I need to get close to her. "Bart!" Tim shouted. "Whirlwind!"
"Got it!" Bart replied. Bart ran to Passion and circled her at lightning speed, creating a whirlwind. He threw a punch now and then as he ran. Passion levitated in the air and sent tendrils of magic spiraling in every direction. "Woah!" Bart exclaimed as one caught his leg and made him trip, slide, and roll.
Not giving Passion a second to breathe, Tim came charging at her with a superman punch. Passion's eyes widened in surprise as she found herself forced to defend herself against Tim's charging superman punch. "You are so annoying!" she glared as she blocked Tim's punches and kicks. Countering one of her blocks, Tim jabbed, striking her in the face. Passion stumbled back and stared at Tim with a mixture of rage and lust. "You hit hard," she smirked. "I like that. My turn." Immobilizing Tim with her powers, Passion launched her own attack, punching and slapping Tim in the face. "You seem like a guy who likes it rough," she laughed as she raked her nails across Tim's face. Bart attacked Passion from behind. She released Tim from her powers and took a beating from Bart as he was too fast for her. "Enough!" she screamed, releasing another surge of magic, throwing Bart, Tim, and the emotions back. "I'm done with your stupid plan, Miss Know-It-All," she growled. Her hands crackled with magic. "I'm gonna kill everyone!"
Raven tapped her foot restlessly as she and Constantine reviewed their mission. They'd been at it for over an hour. "Do you have a guess as to who Circe was talking about?" Constantine asked. "It's like trying to decipher a riddle wrapped in an enigma? If I had to hazard a guess, she's probably referring to some ancient bloody menace or a power-hungry sorcerer. She did mention Enchantress. Any thoughts?"
"For the last time," Raven nearly growled, "I have no idea what or who she's talking about! I don't know how Enchantress or the Lords of Chaos fit into this! We're getting nowhere! Just help me find them, and I'll kill them all!" Raven released a wave of energy, shattering every glass in the room, including the one Constantine was holding. Raven froze in shock. What just…oh no.
"Damn, girl," Constantine said. "Eh…you broke it," he whined, holding up a jagged piece of what used to be a glass bottle of rum."
"I am so sorry," Raven apologized sincerely. "But I've got to go. I know what's wrong. I'll tell you later," Raven said before teleporting away.
Constantine mournfully stared at the shattered rum bottle in his hand. He threw it over his shoulder with a shrug and said, "Pub it is, then."
Raven appeared in her room and ran to a dresser. "What!" she gasped. "It was right here." Looking around, her eyes found it on the floor. Raven lifted it with her powers and grasped it in her hands. She stared in horror at the giant crack cutting across the glass. "Trigon-dammit."
Tim had no idea where Bart was. All he knew was – his face was numb, bruised, and bloodied; and Passion had his neck in an iron grip. "Passion!" Confidence lifted herself off the ground and popped her shoulder back into place. "Let go of that handsome man!"
"I find his handsomeness irksome," Passion replied, "he irks me. I want to throttle him every time I see his handsome face!" she tightened her hold on Tim's neck. She glared at him with her four eyes. "Do you know how much your handsome face pisses me off?" she asked, giving him a shake.
"If you find him handsome, why are you so upset?" Joy asked. She sported several bruises of her own.
"Shut up!" Passion screamed, sending a weak blast of energy her way. Fortunately for Tim, Passion was growing weak and tired; unfortunately for Tim, he was already tired. He'd taken so many headshots. Passion liked and disliked his face, and it showed in her attacks. While she went all out on Joy, Confidence, Knowledge, and Bart (Anguish had vanished ages ago), she only aimed for his head. There wasn't much he could do while concussed. All he could do was slip his fingers under the ones around his neck that were crushing his airway. "I want to both kiss and hit this guy!" she screamed. "And it's pissing me off! So, I'm going to kill him!"
"You can't kill him while he's in here," Knowledge coughed. Blood trickled from her mouth while one side of her face bore heavy bruising.
Passion shrugged. "I won't know unless I try." She squeezed even tighter. Black dots appeared at the edge of Tim's vision. I'm going to pass out, was his final thought before he heard a "Stop!" Oxygen flooded his lungs as his body crumbled. Rolling onto his back, he was grateful to see a pair of violet eyes. Huh, he wondered, have her eyes always been that pretty?
"Tim," he heard. Her voice swam in his head. "Tim. Tim!" Suddenly, Tim could feel his face, and his head was no longer pounding.
"Raven," he said. Raven helped him sit up. "When did you–"
"Raven!" Bart cried out. Less than a second later, he was hugging the empath from behind, sobbing into her back. "I am so sorry. I am so, so, sorry. I will never, ever enter your room again. Please, just take us back!"
"Well, that sort of answers one of my questions," Raven said. "What is going on? What happened to Tim's face? And why isn't she locked away?" Raven pointed to Passion, who was now wrapped in chains from head-to-toe.
Passion glared at Raven. "Confidence released me," she sneered.
"Why?" Raven asked Confidence.
"It was Knowledge's idea," Confidence said.
"It was your plan," Knowledge replied.
"Yeah, but you're the smart one. You're supposed to stop me from doing stupid things."
"What plan?" Raven asked as she tried to push Bart away.
"Please let me hold you," he whispered. "It lets me know that you're the real you."
"Bart and Tim fell into the mirror," Joy bounced on her feet. She looked good for someone who just had their butts beaten.
"We didn't fall in," Tim corrected her as he stood, releasing a loud groan. "We got pulled in because Bart broke into Raven's room."
"It's a decision I regret and a mistake I will never make again," Bart said, refusing to release Raven.
"Bart," Raven said, "let me go, or I will leave you here." Bart immediately released her. "Now," Raven sighed, "what is going on?"
"Bart and Tim entered the mirror," Joy smiled.
"Yes, I know," Raven said. "Why didn't any of you alert me?"
The heads of Bart and Tim snapped towards Raven. "What do you mean?" Bart asked. "You mean to tell me your emotions could have alerted you at any time?"
"Yeah," Raven answered. "I wouldn't have been able to release you immediately, but I would have been able to keep you safe." Raven turned to her emotions, ignoring the appearance of Anguish. "Why didn't any of you alert me?"
"Confidence wanted to teach Tim a lesson because he was so mean when you first arrived," Anguish cried.
"You were part of this, too?" Raven asked in surprise. "You're usually too scared to do anything."
"I just wanted to make Joy happy," Anguish sobbed into her cloak.
"Hold on," Tim pinched his nose. "You kept us here as a prank?"
"Amusement isn't even here," Raven said. "It's just you four…and Passion."
"I don't need Amusement to pull a prank," Knowledge replied with an eye roll, "we have Joy." Joy nodded enthusiastically at the sound of her name.
"What about me?" Bart asked. "I was nice to Raven."
"You entered her room without permission and touched her things," Confident replied. "You're lucky I didn't slap you as soon as you appeared."
"We didn't pull you into the mirror," Joy explained. "That's a defense triggered when someone who isn't Raven tries to steal it."
"I wasn't trying to steal it," Bart said. "It was for Truth or Dare."
"You didn't have her permission, and that's basically the same thing," Joy grinned.
"Okay," Tim said. "So, in the beginning, when we walked through those memory apparitions…?"
"Stalling to set everything up," Knowledge said. "Joy met you first to get you to let your guard down. Making you go through Anguish's domain was our way of mildly torturing you."
"Mildly?" Bart scoffed. "I'm not going to be able to sleep for over a week."
"You let them see my fears?" Raven asked angrily. Passion immediately perked up at the surge of power she felt, and Raven had to calm herself down. "You gave them access to…me?"
"Don't worry," Knowledge sighed, "we only showed them the Nightmare Mirrors and Path of Terror. We kept them away from the Darkest Thoughts and the Forest of Lost Dreams."
"What the heck!" Bart exclaimed.
"We created a faux version of Trigon-Raven. She was 100 times weaker than the real thing."
"The giant thing? That's your version of weak?" Bart asked, his eyes wide with terror.
"And Passion?" Tim pointed to the red-clad Raven, who was desperately trying to free herself. "You just wanted to see me get pummeled?"
"Trust me," Knowledge said, "deep down, Raven enjoyed seeing a version of herself beat the crap out of you."
"That's not true!" Raven argued. "Why would you show them all of this? You may have given Bart PTSD, and Tim…why?"
"First," Knowledge fixed her glasses, "Bart's PTSD probably comes from the fact his great-grandad can't keep his hands off the timeline. And I chose to show Tim because…I wanted to get things rolling."
"What do you mean?"
"The sarcophagus has begun to crack," Confidence said.
Raven's face grew serious. "What?" she asked. "Why?"
"Well…" Knowledge gestured to Tim with her head.
"No," Raven folded her arms.
"Sorry," Knowledge shrugged.
"No."
"We can't help it," Anguish sobbed.
"I'll put an end to it," Raven said.
"What are they talking about?" Bart asked Tim.
"I honestly have no idea," Tim answered truthfully.
"Okay," Raven rubbed her temples. "I'm too tired to deal with this. Bart, Tim, I'm sorry you've been stuck in here. Though, it is clearly Bart's fault. Emotions," Raven's eyes glowed black as she turned to them, "go to sleep." She snapped her fingers, and everything disappeared.
Tim, Raven, and Bart appeared in Raven's room. Raven picked her mirror up off the floor. The crack was gone. She breathed a sigh of relief. "I don't understand what happened," Bart spoke.
Raven turned and pinned him with a sharp glare. Bart took a step back. "A nsdka," she mumbled incoherently. Before Bart could move, Raven was in front of him with her hand on his head. "Forget what you saw," she commanded. Bart's eyes flashed black. He then stumbled backwards. "What did you do?" he demanded. "What did you do?" Bart paused. "Wait," he smiled, "I can't remember anything I saw. I mean, I remember going into your mirror–"
"Invading my privacy," Raven interrupted him.
"Yeah, that; but I remember nothing from Anguish's territory. This is great! Thanks, Raven! Woo-hoo! I'm gonna go tell Batman what I did and buy you an apology card with flowers. Bye." Bart zipped away. Raven turned to Tim. "Raven," Tim began, taking a step back with his hands up.
"Relax," Raven said. "I'm not going to tinker with your mind." Tim visibly relaxed. "I can trust that you'll keep your mouth shut about what you saw, right?" Raven asked, her eyes flashing red.
"Of course," Tim answered. "Raven, some of the fears I saw–"
"And I never want to talk about it."
"I need to ask this. One of the fears, on that path—I could have sworn one panel had my face on it." Raven didn't speak or blink. "Are you…are you afraid of me?"
"When I said I never want to talk about it, I meant I don't want to talk about it with you," Raven tried to hide the shakiness in her voice, but Tim heard it.
"I know I was mean, mistrustful, and unhelpful when you first arrived. I am sorry. I should have been nicer."
"Tim, I'm tired. I still have things from the mission I need to tell John. I don't have time to do…whatever it is you want to do."
"I just," Tim said, taking a small step towards her. "I need you to know—you don't have to be afraid of me. I will not hurt you."
Raven stared at him. "Please, go," she whispered.
"Okay. Thank you for getting us out of there. Once again, I am sorry for…everything."
Raven watched as Tim turned on his heel and left her room. She relaxed once the door shut behind him. Her lower lip trembled, and she closed her eyes to keep tears from forming. This is for the best, she thought. It's just a crush. It will go away. Besides, I won't be here long. A buzz from her phone got her attention. Earlier that day, she had exchanged numbers with the rest of Justice League Dark. The text she received was from Kent Nelson, or Dr. Fate. Raven's heart raced as she read and reread the text. She didn't want to get her hopes up, but the text read, I found Azarath. Raven covered a sob with her hand. Finally, she thought as a tear rolled down her cheek, I can go home.
Raven returned to her apartment exhausted, her emotions drained and strained at the same time. Her conversation with Tim took more out of her than she had hoped for.
The guilt and worry still settled heavily in her stomach, despite having finally come clean to Tim. She had hoped that after years of keeping this secret from him, she’d finally have a weight lifted from her shoulders. But her nerves told her otherwise and her anxiety multiplied when she felt Tim’s startling realization that he had a child – it honestly felt like she got ran over by a truck.
Absently gnawing her bottom lip, she thought of Tim and the storm of emotions she left him with that evening. She knew he was lost in his own thoughts, the repercussions of wrong choices from many years ago finally catching up on him. She felt terrible for dumping such an important truth on him so unceremoniously. Even more so from keeping his child from him for so many years. What would his family think? The public? Stephanie? Her stomach lurched, she wanted to throw up. Jesus Christ, she was horrible.
“Mommy?”
The small voice was laced with curiosity and concern, cutting through Raven’s train of thoughts. Raven looked down at the tiny human being beside her, quickly realizing that she had a daughter to take care of. Raven’s own whirlwind of emotions could wait. There’s a little child to feed, bathe, entertain, and put to sleep.
“Hey,” Raven offered a gentle smile, catching Leila’s blue eyes as they stared up at her. For a moment, she marveled at how much of a spitting image the child was of Tim. From her blue eyes to black hair, the playful smile, her eyebrows, and the shape of her face – her features matched her father’s.
Leila tilted her head curiously at her mother. While Raven may not know the extent of how much her daughter may have inherited her demonic heritage, she was sure Leila was an empath much as herself. The little girl must have caught on Raven’s frayed nerves.
“C’mon, you,” Raven gently nudged her deeper into their new apartment, a recent acquisition. She wasn’t sure how long they would settle in Gotham, but she felt she’d set something up just in case Tim wanted to build a relationship with his daughter. It felt like the most reasonable thing to do.
“You must be hungry,” Raven mused thoughtfully while the little girl chirped a yes in response. “What do you want to eat?”
“Cake, pwease. Thank you!”
Raven released a soft huff of laughter. “Perhaps spaghetti, yes?” she bargained. When she received a request for lots of cheese and “two meatbaws, pwease” in response, the request for cake was forgotten, and the two settled to make spaghetti with meatballs. Raven wasn’t the best cook, but she rarely heard complaints from her daughter, which she was thankful for.
Despite her exhausting afternoon, Raven still had enough energy to focus on her daughter and listen to her babble about her afternoon at daycare. Raven listened, actively asked questions, voiced her opinion over Sally not sharing crayons (“That’s not nice. Did you share your crayons?” “Yup!”) and hope she did not come across too tired to the perceptive child.
When everyone was fed, and dishes had been clumsily loaded into the dishwasher by Leila (creating more of a mess than necessary), and the child was bathed, they settled for a book to read (The Princess and the Pea) in her bedroom.
Motherhood was not something she prepared for, nor thought she’d ever have to prepare for. It wasn’t in her plans or did she picture herself ever to be a mother. But somehow, here she was curled up on the soft violet carpet of her child’s bedroom, reading The Princess and the Pea to an amused 3-year-old.
“Good night, Lei,” Raven pressed a kiss to the child’s forehead after tucking her into her bed. The little girl mumbled her good night, the promise of playtime at the park dying on her lips, and her tiny fingers tightly wrapping around an old cat plushie, Ginny.
After making sure the child was asleep, Raven stood up, checked to make sure that windows were locked, and every book and toy returned to their boxes and shelves. She turned off the lights and kept the fairy night light on before quietly stepping out of the room. She glanced briefly into the room, the gentle pink and violet light casting a lulling glow into the room. The little lump in bed stirred, curling into herself, and Raven suddenly thought of today’s events and if she did alright as a mother. Her stomach churned.
With her worries and insecurities returning a hundredfold, Raven went through the motions of the evening. Turning on the dishwasher and cleaning the kitchen, returning toys and books to their rightful places in their small living room, and setting out to do laundry.
The gnawing in the pit of her stomach returned as their home fell into silence and her thoughts kept her company. Her muscles hurt and her nerves stretched and frayed from every last ounce of emotions spent. Meeting Tim didn’t last long, just under an hour – she had to pick-up Leila from daycare. But those 40 minutes felt like a lifetime, zapping her energy dry.
As she sifted through the colored and whites of their laundry, a routinary task she had grown accustomed with over the years, she wondered what would change now that Tim knew. She wondered if Tim would do the same, sort his child’s laundry in his most likely expensive laundry machine. Would he even know how to wash children’s clothing? Sort the whites from the colored? Raven paused as she picked up a tiny zebra pajama bottom and she blinked, worry growing in the pit of her stomach, would Tim even be interested in his daughter?
“I’m so sorry,” she told him that evening. The weight of Tim’s onslaught of emotions – anger, disbelief, panic, confusion, frustration – seemed to slowly suffocate her, straining her own emotions. Her body groaned in agony. “I wish I could have told you sooner, but I was –”
“Afraid, yes, I know,” Tim cut her off, terse. He sat more rigid, hands curling into fists before frustratingly running along the length of thighs before stopping at his knees. He clutched his knees as if trying to anchor his emotions and released a loud sigh. Raven watched him stare off into space, deep in thought.
They fell into heavy silence, with Tim just staring at his garishly orange teapot, brows furrowed and breathing deeply. Raven watched him, her own regret and worry growing in the pit of her stomach while feeling Tim’s tumultuous emotions angrily seep into her skin. She felt like throwing up.
“I’m sorry to ask, but,” Tim sounded genuinely apologetic, but his voice was business-like and measured. “Are you sure she’s mine?”
She wanted to feel indignant and snap at him. But he had every right to ask. “I didn’t sleep with anyone else, Tim,”
Tim’s jaw twitched and she watched him swallow, processing the information. He ran a hand across his face, inhaling deeply. His shocked emotions pressed into her skin, making her muscles groan. “I know you had your reasons, Raven, I respect that, I just – I,” he paused, releasing a frustrated huff. “I wish you told me sooner,”
“I know,” she replied. She felt her emotions strain. “I’m sorry, I wish things were different. But they’re not,” Raven said, feeling herself close to snapping as well. She pressed on, as the mad mix of emotions spurred her on. “I know it’s not fair, I wish I had the courage to tell you sooner, but I didn’t. But you deserve to know. It would be unfair to keep this from you. I just wanted to let you know – what you’ll do with this information, I’ll leave it up to you, Tim,”
Brows furrowed over stormy blue eyes and Raven watched him swallow as he processed her words. He released a long, frustrated sigh. His spiked emotions wrapped around her like a weighted blanket, sinking into her and weighing her down. “I need to process this more,”
She left the apartment soon after, there was nothing more to discuss that evening. She practically flew out of his apartment, blindly grabbing her jacket, and rushing out into the streets to inhale deeply the muggy Gotham air as the world seemed to tilt underneath her feet. She wasn’t sure what she’d expect out of their meeting today.
Raven sighed, memories of that afternoon still bothering her, worry weighing down her movements. She set the laundry machine and began running a load. She glanced at the pile of dark colored clothes, mostly her own, and wondered if she’d still have time tonight to run another load once the first one would be done.
Exhausted, her emotions buzzing under her skin, she padded barefoot into her kitchen and grabbed Leila's half-empty juice box. No use of letting that get to waste. While waiting for her laundry to get done, she sunk into her couch and curled into herself, turning on the TV and mindlessly watching the Minions movies, Leila’s latest interest.
She felt him before his silhouette appeared on her window. As Raven watched the little yellow Minions run across the screen, she could see his hulking shadow cast across her carpet. She heard the faint click in the background and Raven smiled in amusement as Stuart (or Kevin?) babbled loudly.
"You need better locks,"
As the Minions started babbling about bananas Raven glanced at Red Robin, his suited figure larger than life. Despite how much he denied his similarities to Batman, the Red Robin suit reminded her just how similar Tim and Bruce were. Intimidating, calculating, and strong. The sight of him, taller and larger than she remembered, made her chest tighten and she inhaled deeply, trying to still every electrifying nerve in her body. Red Robin was a familiar sight she should be accustomed to, but seeing him here after close to five years, seemed all too new for her.
“I don’t think anyone will climb up to the 22nd floor to see me,” Raven deadpanned. She grabbed the Juicebox, sugary orange juice, and took an absent sip from it. She went back to staring at the Minions, the volume of the TV barely above a whisper.
Red Robin shifted from where he stood by the windows, cowl still drawn and his stance rigid and muscles tight. “This is Gotham,” he stated, tone tense and just a little gruff. Raven felt a chill run down her spine, albeit mild, but it had her sit up just a little straighter.
Raven blinked as she felt his tense emotions, tearing her gaze away from hundreds of Minions going crazy on screen. She stared at Tim; the air seemed to warm with the tension that slowly stretched between them. It felt strange to stare into the white lenses of his cowl, she knew he was studying her. “There are enough wards in this place to send an intruder to hell,” she replied.
Red Robin tilted his head curiously. “And what about me? Am I not an intruder?”
She couldn’t help it. Her skin bristled and her nerves were on the edge. “Maybe this is hell for you?”
She watched his shoulders hike just a fraction of an inch, his muscles incredibly tight, and his gloved hands twitched at his sides. She felt his emotions burn her. The moment broke when he released a long sigh and his face crumpled. Shoulders slumping, Red Robin pulled back his cowl carefully, and Tim Drake-Wayne finally stared at Raven apologetically.
“Raven,” he breathed, blue eyes looked tired and confused. Inhaling deeply, he tried to find words as he stared at an expectant Raven. “I –”
“I really didn’t think you’d come by tonight,” she mused, sitting up and dropping the remote on her coffee table. It slid across the wooden surface, gently nudging their daughter’s little ballerina toy. Raven blinked at the thought – their daughter, now with Tim finally in the picture. Her heart tightened. “I thought you’d need more time,”
Tim sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I do, but I also want to talk more,” he said. She felt his distraught emotions, her stomach churned feeling sorry for him. “I just need help navigating through all of this. It’s a lot to take in, Raven,”
“Okay,” Raven breathed. She watched him stare at her, looking like a man trying to make sense of things. The air still seemed tense, but less so. Swallowing, and trying to tame the last shreds of her sanity, she offered him a tentative smile. “Do you want anything to drink? Coffee? Tea? Water,” she glanced at her, their she corrected, daughter’s Juicebox. “Juicebox?”
Tim released a soft croak of a chuckle, awfully sounding like a cross between amusement and disbelief. He carefully looked around the dimly lit room, studying the furniture and decorations, as if cataloging every little detail. Raven stood up, giving Tim a moment to memorize some of the children’s books and toys that were lined up against the wall. “I’ll get you something to drink, you can sit down. Just be careful not to step on some of her dinosaurs,” she glanced at Tim’s steel-toe boots and the corner of her lips quirked up lightly. “You might crush her stegosaurus,”
She returned a moment later carrying a cup of coffee. An unmasked Red Robin sat on her couch looking pensively at a small plush rainbow rabbit in his gloved hands. It looked miniscule in his large, gloved hands. She quietly sat down next to him and placed the cup of coffee in front of him, startling him out of his thoughts. “That’s Coco,” Raven said, gently.
“Coco?”
Raven hummed and tore her gaze away from the old rabbit. She absently picked up the Juicebox and drank the last few dregs of orange juice. “We got it last year, around Easter. We had a few fresh coconuts in Indonesia. I guess she remembered coconuts when I gave her that, thus Coco,”
“Indonesia?” Raven ignored how Tim’s eyes burned into her, instead she focused on the colorful drawings on the Juicebox. “So that was true? Traveling around Asia and Europe?”
“Yeah,” Raven looked at Tim, catching him studying her. She offered him an apologetic smile, her emotions getting the better of her and her body just sagging under the whirlwind of emotions. “I’m really sorry, Tim, about all of this,”
Tim sighed, looking completely tired and lost, a first in her books. Tim fiddled with the colorful bunny ears, staring at it lost in thought before offering her small smile. “I’m sorry too,” he offered gently, his voice sounding completely and utterly broken at the moment. “I’m equally at fault,”
Raven stared at him, gauging his confused emotions as he tried to process being in a room filled with toys and Knick knacks of his daughter. Her heart twinged at the sight, large, gloved fingers cradling a rainbow rabbit, and she wished she offered Tim the opportunity of meeting his daughter sooner. She felt her selfishness eating her chest. “What do you want to talk about?” she asked, voice cracking just a bit.
Tim looked around, as if trying to figure out what best to ask from the multitude of questions that seemed to race through his mind. He blinked as a thought crossed his mind. “How old is she?”
“3 and seven months,” she replied.
“Huh,” Tim breathed, letting the thought sink in. “Terrible Threes?”
Raven released a soft laugh, of course Tim would know about child development phases. “Thankfully, not as much anymore. Maybe we’re closing in on the ‘fantastic four’s’” she breathed. She tilted her head as she watched curiosity blossom on Tim’s face. His expression reminded her a lot of Leila’s inquisitive looks. Cerulean eyes that glistened in wonder. “Maybe occasionally, when she can’t navigate her own emotions or when she doesn’t understand things. But she’s very smart and seems to handle herself well,”
“Emotions?” Tim blinked. “Does she have powers?”
Raven shrugged. “She definitely is an empath; she can pick up emotions. She gets curious when she picks up something new and different. I don’t know if she has other powers, or if her powers are diluted because you’re human and I’m half demon. I’m sure her powers would be latent, it’s honestly really a wait and see at this point,”
Raven paused, studying his thoughtful expression. Her stomach churned as an ugly, distant memory resurfaced and she frowned. “Is that a problem for you?” she asked, her tone defensive and her skin seemed to tingle in protective energy.
Tim’s blue eyes widened, and he straightened, as worry and panic washed over him. She watched him shake his head, carefully dropping Coco the bunny into the space between them. “You know me well enough that this doesn't matter to me, Raven,” he pressed. He frowned, brows furrowed defensively, and he stared at her with a determined glint. “And it shouldn’t matter to anyone else,”
Raven released a soft dismissive huff, she looked unimpressed. “Look, you must understand the main reason why we stayed away from everyone was because most of the people we know either wanted me gone or dead because my father was Trigon. I was, I am,” she corrected. “Still considered a threat to many. I’m still afraid of what they’d think of hearing that Trigon now has a granddaughter,” she pressed on, frustration and anger spurring her on.
She watched Tim inhale deeply, processing her words and looking both stricken and apologetic at her words. She knew he understood what she meant – Batman, his father, close to 12 years ago pushed a young Raven away from the Justice League. Wounds would always leave scars.
“Raven,” Tim whispered, he looked sorry and hurt. She felt her throat tighten defensively; she didn’t want his pity. “I really can’t reverse what happened in the past. You should have never, never, gone through that with the Justice League. But I’ll never,” he stressed, his tone hardening, and a protective glint shone in his eyes as he stared at her. “I’ll never let anyone hurt Leila. I promise,”
There was a protectiveness that radiated from Tim that made Raven again regret not allowing him to see his daughter earlier. Her stomach churned painfully. She watched him swallow, his sharp jaw twitched as if his daughter’s name rolled off his tongue for the very first time.
There was a sense of security and protectiveness from Tim that made Raven’s heart leap. But at the same time longing bubbled under her skin – where was this protection when she was younger, when she had to run from a world that wanted her dead?
Raven inhaled deeply, immediately stopping her thoughts – her past had no place in this narrative.
“Okay,” she breathed, trying to settle the last shreds of her nerves. She looked at Tim’s intense eyes and she tried not to get too overwhelmed by his own stormy thoughts. Tonight was a lot to take in, for both of them.
“What do we do now?” he finally asked. Tim still looked overwhelmed and confused and Raven watched him seemingly rack his brain for an answer.
Raven blinked, for a moment unsure how to answer. Tilting her head, she watched Tim’s face studying her. “What do you want to do?” she asked tentatively. Concern and dread bubbled forebodingly in her stomach – what would she tell her, their, daughter if her father would not be a part of her life?
The decision was up to Tim, she knew. A part of her was prepared for whatever his decision may be – he was a Wayne after all. And while children outside of marriage were not uncommon, Tim did uphold a vastly different public image from Bruce Wayne. How involved he wanted to be in his daughter’s life was entirely up to him, and she’d respect that. But the twinge in her heart at the different possibilities left her aching, for so many reasons she would not admit.
“This is up to you, Tim,” she continued. “It wasn’t fair for me to keep this from you for the last four years. It wasn’t fair to Leila either. I’ll leave this to you – if you want to be involved or not. But you had to know she’s here. I’ll res—”
“I want to be there for her,” Tim cut her off, brows drawing together in confusion and looking incredulous.
Raven felt her breath catch and heart hammering in her chest. “Please don’t think I’d never want to be a part of my daughter’s life, Raven,” he said, voice sounding just a little wounded. A myriad of emotions pressed into her as Tim continued. She watched Tim swallow, looking clearly overwhelmed. “Look, I wish I knew sooner. I wish you didn’t feel the need to hide and protect yourselves – or myself. I wish I could have been there for the both of you. It’s unfair you had to do this alone for the last three years, I should have helped,” he said, regret lacing his voice.
Tim offered her small, tired, tentative smile. His tight, defensive posture finally sagging as at the weight of his words. Yes, he had a daughter. They had a daughter. “It’s a lot to take in,” he admitted. Tim absently stared at Coco the rabbit and fiddled with one of the floppy rainbow ears. “I–I don’t know what to do right now. I do want to take responsibility and be present, if you let me. I know we’ll figure something out, right?”
Raven inhaled, taking an unsteady breath, as the weight of his words settled around her. They rattled her– things could easily go so wrong and right. Raven tried to navigate her emotions and offered him a soft smile. “Right,” she repeated, offering them both some assurance.
They stared at each other for a moment, waiting for the other to say something. As if on cue, a soft whine carried through the quiet of her apartment and they both stared at the doorway of her living room. “Oh,” Raven breathed.
Tim watched Raven stand up, offering him a murmured “One moment,” before disappearing through the doorway and into her dark apartment. After another whine and low whispers, Raven returned with a small peach colored bundle wrapped around her chest. Small fuzzy socks with avocado patterns dangled around her hips and Tim stared breathlessly at the sight.
It felt like the room exploded with emotions as Raven carefully stepped into the room, cradling their sleepy daughter to her chest. Her steps faltered at the onslaught of Tim’s jump of emotions as he stared at them slowly returning to the couch. Leila whined in discomfort, likely feeling the jumble of emotions in the room, tiny hands fisting into Raven’s shirt and sleepily squirming in her hold.
Under Tim’s intense gaze, Raven carefully sat down and gently arranged their sleeping daughter on her lap and pressed her into her chest to make her more comfortable. Tiny arms and legs wrapped tightly around her in sleepy discomfort, releasing a soft whine.
“I think we might have been thinking and feeling too loudly,” Raven whispered thoughtfully, her dark blue eyes staring at the top of Leila’s head tucked under her chin. Placing a gentle hand on her daughter's back, she hoped the added little weight would comfort the little girl.
Raven glanced at Tim, his blue eyes widened, and he carefully leaned away from them. “Oh,” he breathed in mild panic. “I’m sorry,”
Whatever worries she may have had over Tim, the chaos she seemed to have unceremoniously dumped into his life, and him finally arriving in his daughter’s life seemed to momentarily dissipate. She watched the awe blossom on Tim’s face as he intently stared at the small breathing bundle, tightly wrapped around Raven. She felt his gentle emotions press into her and Raven felt her chest warm in response. She drew in a measured deep breath as distant memories and emotions sent tingles down her spine. She willed her nerves to still.
“It’s alright,” Raven offered, voice gentle and controlled. She watched as Tim stared intently, memorizing the tiny foot covered in cartoon avocados to Leila’s peach-colored pajamas with funny little fairy drawings. The child’s head was turned away from him, safely tucked under Raven’s chin – but Tim continued to stare at the little breathing lump, in total awe.
As if on cue, the little girl gave a little sleepy mumble and wiggled in Raven’s arms, trying to get comfortable. With a soft yaw, Leila turned her head and pressed her left cheek into Raven’s chest. Raven watched a little breathless as the little girl sleepily blinked at a very still Tim.
Tim inhaled sharply and in the muted lights of Raven’s living room, stared directly at his daughter in sheer wonder for the very first time. Sleepy cerulean eyes stared back at him, cheek smooshed into Raven, and long black mussed hair framed her sleepy face. Raven watched Tim swallow, at a loss at the sight.
“Hi,” Tim croaked. Raven watched a watery smile cross his face.
Leila blinked, stared at Tim for a moment longer, before yawning and slumping further into Raven and slowly closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep. Raven heard Tim release a shuddering breath and she turned her attention to the man, noticing how he seemed to have scooted just a fraction of an inch closer and just stared enthralled at the sleeping child.
“She–”
“Looks just like you,”
Tim swallowed, his blue eyes breaking contact from Raven’s and dropping back to the little girl, completely enraptured by the sight. “Raven,” Tim breathed, as if finally, the reality of being a father hit him. She knew Tim well, she felt him at this very moment – working, thinking, planning, and ensuring the future, safety, and everything possible for this little new human in his life.
“We’ll make it work,” she assured him, but perhaps more for herself too. Tim nodded before carefully settling into the couch, deciding that he had no place he’d rather be than watch his new daughter sleep.
Raven watched as Tim Drake-Wayne in full Red Robin uniform comfortably leaned into her couch and just stared at his sleeping daughter, a gentle aura of fear, admiration, love, and so much more emanating from him. She ignored how that ugly mixture of guilt and longing suddenly returned and gnawed at her chest.
This will work.
~~
Notes: Tension, what tension? Of course there will be tension! Not your usual family fic. lol.
Tim flopped into the plush chair by the window, his head fell back against his shoulders and he stared at the ceiling of his posh hotel room. A low groan escaped his throat and he ran a hand over his face, wishing he could be anywhere but here. In fact, he’d rather be back with the Titans over this damned conference on the other side of the world.
These tech conferences were always a mixture of innovation and annoyance. On one hand, Tim could learn about all the potential new technologies that could be incorporated into Wayne Industries - and subsequently the rest of the Bat family. And, on the other hand, he had to deal with people vying for his attention every single moment. Everyone was trying to suck up to him, and beg for funding from the tech giant of Wayne Industries.
He sighed and kicked off his shoes, splaying his legs out in front of him. He needed a stiff drink.
Chapter 6: Once an accident, twice a coincidence, thrice a habit
It takes habit to make this a regular game.
You guys wanted more history, I give you you more smutty history. It's messy, it's complicated, and it's all very smutty.
Enjoy!
Previously: Chapter 5
~~~
The first time was an accident – or perhaps she liked to think so.
Tim was a flurry of emotions weeks after another argument with his ex(?)-girlfriend Stephanie (something that seemed to happen more often than they’d like), another case that seemed to have taken over his life, and another fallout with the Batfamily. On the outside, he seemed typical Tim – collected, charismatic, exhausted, and every bit of a leader to safely (relatively speaking) drag them through that week’s shitshow.
On the inside however, Tim was a storm of emotions. It was grating on Raven’s last nerves.
Raven paused and realized she had unconsciously stopped in front of Red Robin’s door. The cup of tea was slowly scalding her hands, but she barely paid attention to the heat. Instead, she felt the onslaught of emotions seeping out of Tim’s door and gnawing at her skin. Tim had come from Gotham earlier that evening, and he was no ray of sunshine.
And she thought Jason’s emotions were a hurricane.
She knocked, her knuckles rapping just a little too hard against his door. Frustration bubbled under her skin. Not soon after, Tim’s door opened, the noise slicing through the still of the night (morning? What time was it?). Blue eyes warily stared down at her.
“Raven?” Tim stared at her, blinking away the confusion in his eyes.
“You need to stop,” Raven hissed, fingers tightening around her mug, and she frowned up at him. He was still in uniform, of course, working on whatever ridiculous case he got his hands on.
Tim titled his head, looking even more confused. “What?”
“This,” she hissed, voice low with everyone sleeping down the hall. She absently waved her hand at him in general, her hand gesture vague and admittedly terribly confusing. She knew she could do better at explaining things – but holy fuck, she was tired. His confusion mixed with everything else made her bristle. “All of this,”
Tim crossed his arms and Raven watched his eyebrows draw together as he stared at her. Confusion and frustration dangerously bubbling over. “I’m still not following,”
Raven released an irritated huff and unceremoniously pushed Tim into his room, the young man stumbling backwards in surprise and confusion at Raven’s force. His door room hissed shut behind them and Raven barely registered his room, the papers, technology, and evidence that seemed to litter every corner, and she stared up at him in exasperation. With a flick of her wrist, she cast a silencing spell in his room, in case a shouting match ensued. She had no time to deal with Superboy and his nosy super hearing.
“Your storm of emotions is grating on my nerves,” she snapped at him as they stood in the middle of his room.
Tim blinked, a look of understanding crossing his face and his tight shoulders seemed to loosen just a fraction. Raven knew he understood how her abilities worked and she immediately felt him consciously drawing away, a mental practice she knew Batman taught him.
“Oh,” he breathed, arms dropping to his side, and he offered her a sheepish look. “I’m sorry,”
Raven frowned. “Don’t be,” she said. “Look, I’m not asking you to bottle up your emotions on my account. I can handle that,” she sighed and shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know, this can’t be healthy, Tim,”
In hindsight, once Future Raven would look back, everything moving forward with them was not healthy. A complete and utter shitshow, yes.
She felt him close off further, protective walls immediately going up. They were by no means close, like to the standards of Superboy and Bart. She was at most, and felt like, an outsider to the team. But she liked Tim, he was nice and tried to understand her and get to know her while others were wary of her and her history. He respected her and she appreciated that. Beyond her annoyance over how he seemed to consistently grate on her nerves and concentration, she was concerned. Tim was a friend.
She watched him release a soft chuckle. “It’s nothing," he said and brushed her off. He turned on his heels and made his way back to the mess on his desk, signaling an end to their conversation. She felt his tense emotions, his focus turning back to whatever he was thinking and working on.
Raven frowned at his back. "It is something when you brood like Batman,"
Tim released a bark of laughter, he looked over his shoulder and a look of pure amusement crossed his face as he stared at her. “I do not brood like Batman,”
Raven rolled her eyes and sat down uninvited at the foot of his bed. She shot him an unimpressed look. “If you’re not trying to kill us at training, you’re locked up in your room working on whatever cold case you can get your hands on. And you’re consumed with this case you are working on. You’ve been snippy at Bart and Kon, they’re like little puppies you kicked into the rain,”
She watched him shuffle a few papers around, shoulders tense, and she could practically feel his closed off emotions bubbling underneath his skin. She wondered if that’s what she was like back when her emotions caused her too much trouble. She saw him frown at his table. “That’s not true,”
Raven tilted her head, borderline amused and frustrated at Tim. “Empath, remember?”
Tim sighed loudly, throwing the papers he was seemingly studying on the table and turned to Raven with a frown. “Okay, fine,” he breathed. Crossing his room, he sat down next to her, and Raven looked at him, studying his frown and the bubbling emotions. His warmth and his storm of emotions sent shivers down her spine.
It often caught her off guard how out of all Bruce’s children, Bruce and Tim held the most similarities – even if Tim did not admit this.
“Tim?” she asked they fell into silence and her tea started to lose its warmth.
She watched his jaw tighten briefly, the scars along his neck that peeked out of his uniform danced with the movement. “Right, sorry, Raven,”
“Here,” she said, passing him her now warm tea. “Tea helps calm me down,”
Tim hummed and took the offered mug. He took a tentative sip before exhaling slowly. “Thanks,” he offered her a small smile. The first she’d seen from him in days.
“It’s probably nothing like Alfred’s,” she commented. She watched him shrug and take another sip.
“Remind me to bring you some the next time I go back to Gotham,”
Raven glanced at him. “I’m guessing that’s not anytime soon,”
Tim hummed, took a long drink from her tea. “Yeah,”
"I can help, if you'd let me," Raven offered, raising her right hand towards his face and a gentle violet glow bathed the side of Tim's face.
Tim caught her hand and gently pushed her back. She expected that from him, all the Bats seemed wary of any kind of magic that would mess with their brains. "Thanks, Raven," he smiled gently at her. "It's alright"
Raven nodded and watched him drink some tea before blankly staring at his door, absently fiddling with her chipped Picasso mug, a gift from Rose. She could feel the thoughts running through his mind and Raven wondered if Tim ever paused to breathe. It always felt like he was running a marathon. She was always curious about Tim and the secret he seemingly kept. It oftentimes felt like he kept more secrets, darker than hers. Perhaps he did, she thought. It was unnerving – her curiosity piqued.
Gloved fingers tapped the rim of her mug, blue eyes stared at her curiously. "What do you do when your emotions," he blinked and paused "and thoughts get too much?"
Raven shrugged. "Meditate," she replied. She absently toyed with a loose string on her pajama bottoms. "Workout, go for a run, do yoga, get a hot bath." She sent him a wry smile, "Talk,"
Tim returned her wry smile. “So, what should I do?"
Raven hummed and eyed him in bemusement. "Talk to your friends? Get out of your room? Go for a run? Drink?" She made a face and she shot him an amused smile. "I don't know. Actually stop working? Sleep? Rub one out?"
Tim released a bark of laughter. "Rub one out?"
Raven shrugged, fighting off the amused smile that threatened to appear on her lips. She watched Tim laugh, the tension in his shoulders finally breaking, blue eyes dancing in amusement - the most life she's seen in them in weeks. "I don't know. Whatever it takes to get off the edge. Jesus, you’ve been obsessing over this case for days. Maybe jerking off helps? All this frustrated energy needs to go somewhere,"
Tim's shoulders visibly relaxed and she watched him snort ungracefully. "Okay, I'll add that to my to do list later then,"
Raven looked mildly horrified. "Please stop. Do not give me a mental image,"
Tim smirked and stood up. He shot her an amused grin over his shoulder. "Too late," He crossed his room and rummaged through one of his cabinets. Raven watched him riffle through one of the smaller cabinets before straightening and pulling out a bottle filled with dark amber liquid. He returned to the bed and sat next to her, a small, amused smile played on his lips as she watched him open the bottle of a very expensive whiskey (that likely cost more than what she made in a month). The familiar smell of alcohol filled the air.
Tim poured some whiskey into her now empty Picasso mug. "Since you're still here and I can't 'rub one out' now as per your suggestion," Raven rolled her eyes at his playfulness, "Let’s drink instead,"
Raven eyed the whiskey bottle warily. “Who would have thought Red Robin allows underage drinking?” she asked and carefully took the offered mug.
Tim shrugged and watched her take a tentative swig. Raven grimaced at the burn of alcohol. “Well, Red Robin doesn’t but Tim Wayne does,” Tim said while tugging off his gloves and staring at her with amused blue eyes.
They talked.
She and Tim rarely talked in the past beyond the occasional banter and their regular meetings. Tim held deeper friendships with Cassie, Kon, and Bart and some of the younger Titans. Raven respected Tim a lot, he was a remarkable Robin and even more so as Red Robin. He was different from Dick in many ways. When she returned to the Titans, from her death after her father’s defeat, Tim was the only one who seemed to welcome her into the group. Where many feared her and kept her at arm’s length, Tim tried to be nice to her – but at the same time kept a close analytical eye on her.
He told her about the case he was working on, something be brought back with him from Gotham, a bloody human trafficking operation. He told her about his recent fallout with the Bats, the fights with Damian, Dick’s behavior, and Bruce’s distance. He told her about Stephanie, their recent argument, her transition to Batgirl, and all the messy details in between him and her. He missed Cass, one of the few family members who seemed to understand and connect with him. He told her about his work at WE, the struggles of being such a young CEO and all the assholes board members he dealt with daily.
They passed around the chipped Picasso mug between them, Raven sharing her own stories of her father, her brothers, relationships lost, and her time in the underworld.
“Hell sure is not fun,” mused Tim.
Raven snorted. “Far from it,” she breathed. She faintly recalled Tim and the team helping her come back, drawing her body back into this world. She watched the young man pour them another round of whiskey and it struck her that she sometimes forgot that Tim was the most human of them all – in every sense of the word.
“What messed up lives we live,” Tim commented, leaning forward and placing his elbows on his thighs. He threw Raven a rueful smile.
Raven hummed in agreement, warm from all the alcohol they had consumed, and she plucked the Picasso mug from his hands. She unconsciously leaned into his side, a little buzzed and sleepy from all the alcohol but her powers were processing through it and her mind was just barely hazy. “Hear, hear,” she mumbled into her mug, taking a small sip of whiskey.
She felt the warm liquid slide down her throat. “Definitely not Hallmark movie material,” Raven mused dryly. She felt Tim chuckle next to her, his shoulders jostling her head as he snorted ungracefully. Her chest tightened, as Tim’s familiar stormy emotions brushed against her, his thoughts now making so much more sense to her. Her stomach churned uneasily at the thought of everything Tim had to endure, it seemed unfair.
“Do you,” Tim paused, seemingly trying to mull over his thoughts as he gently took the mug from her hands. He glanced at her head briefly. Raven felt his curiosity and unease. “I know you’ve been asked this many times before, but – do you still feel your father’s presence?”
Raven blinked and sat up, mildly surprised at the question. She had been asked a few times in the past. It was an old question, mostly because people were more wary of her than concerned. She felt Tim’s curiosity and concern. Raven shook her head as she stared up at him. “No, not anymore. Not for a long time,” she said. She watched him nod and drink from the mug. “He’s been gone for a long time,”
Raven paused, catching his curiosity and his looming emotions that brushed against her side. Her gaze glanced at her mug; Tim's long fingers wrapped around it.
"But I guess sometimes his presence still lingers, just memories," Raven added as an afterthought.
Tim hummed in understanding before drinking the last dregs of the whiskey. She watched Picasso's face peek through Tim's fingers. "I guess our fathers really like to linger and haunt us," he said, shooting her a wry smile.
Raven paused and watched Tim pour them another glass, fingers still steady despite nearly getting through the entire bottle. She wasn't sure who he meant, if it was Bruce or Jack, but both parents weren't best father figures in Tim's life. It was a bit surreal, she'll admit, to see this Tim – all intimate and without the secrets and walls he meticulously kept drawn around himself. It strangely reminded her of her own walls and secrets she kept.
"Fuck them," she breathed suddenly, leaning away from Tim, and stretching her legs out in front of her as she suddenly felt an odd comfort wash over her. Perhaps it was the alcohol or perhaps she just was tired. But this, this moment of rawness between them seemed safe – it was okay.
Tim released a bark of laughter and shot her an amused glance, cheeks mildly flushed and eyes just a tad bit less tired. He looked less like he carried the whole world on his shoulders. It was a good look on him, she mused. "Right," Tim breathed, agreeing to her sentiments.
"How are you not drunk?" She asked curiously, watching him take another sip from her mug before handing it to her. Her mind gently buzzed from the alcohol and sleep sounded perfect right about now.
Tim shrugged. "When I work at WE, a lot of my meetings have alcohol. Some of the countries I visit have lower drinking age restrictions. Overtime, I've built a tolerance or else all these old board members think they can prove their power because they can drink,"
Raven hummed. What a cutthroat world to live in. "Sounds like a good pathway to alcoholism to me," she mumbled, absently wiggling her toes to remind herself not to fall asleep.
Tim chuckled. "It does. We make sure we don't overdo it. My parents and Bruce taught me that," he paused and blinked. "Except for Jason, I think," Tim returned the cork on the whiskey bottle, signaling an end to their drinking. "This was nice. Thanks, Raven,”
“Anything to get you to sleep,” Raven breathed, relieved that finally Tim’s mind was not a cacophony of noise and there was less tension around him. She hoped she didn’t have to drink with him again to achieve this again though. Standing up, she briefly felt the warmth of alcohol tingle her skin and her mind clouded momentarily, the floor shifted, and she willed herself to burn through the alcohol faster.
“You good?” Tim asked her, looking mildly amused as she made a face and swayed for a second in the middle of his room. Raven hated how unaffected Tim looked.
“Yeah,” said Raven. She shrugged dismissively. “Just takes a moment to burn through all the alcohol,” She explained and started to walk towards his door. Tim followed her to the door, his aura much less tense. Raven was relieved, with harmony restored to a certain level, sleep and her bed sounded lovely right now.
“Sounds like a good power to have,” mused Tim, chuckling softly. Raven was silently relieved to see him slightly sway on his feet – at the very least he did seem to get a good buzz out of all their drinking.
Raven paused at his door and turned around, watching Tim’s amused smile spread just a little bit further that evening. The sight made her skin tingle. “I can do that for you now, you won’t have a hangover tomorrow,” she offered, not really waiting for his reply and already reaching out with her glowing hand towards his temple.
“Alright, I could also do without the hangover,” Tim agreed. Raven allowed her powers to reach out and heal Tim, taking the heavy effects of alcohol out of his system and clearing his mind. It seemed strangely personal – intimate – to heal him outside of their usual missions, but Raven ignored the thought and tried to focus on the task at hand.
She felt the alcohol and haziness that came with it bubble underneath her skin as she took the last of the effects of alcohol away from Tim. Dropping her hand, she watched him smile, skin just a little flushed still.
"Thanks," breathed Tim. He blinked, rolling his right shoulder just a bit and he frowned at the movement. "Did you heal my shoulder too?"
Raven shrugged, feeling the shadow of tight muscles that were once Tim's chief complaint with her movement. "I guess I did,"
Ignoring Tim's soft noise of protest, she plucked her Picasso mug out of his hand and started to turn to his door. She really wanted to sleep. "Well, good night, Tim," her hand hovered over his keypad, just about to open his door. She shot him a warning look over her shoulder. "Sleep," she made a face as he released a soft chuckle. "Or rub one out, and sleep,"
"Maybe I will," teased Tim, a playfulness Raven rarely saw.
Her face pinched. "Ugh, stop putting images in my head," There was a playfulness that tickled at her skin. Ignoring her better judgment, she entertained the playfulness.
Tim laughed, thoroughly amused at their exchange. Raven smiled, a surprisingly light moment. "Your fault, your suggestion," Tim tilted his head, studying her amused face. Raven watched the smile grow just a little wider. Scars along his neck bobbed as he swallowed. For a moment, Raven thought she saw Tim studying her.
"You did offer to help,"
There was a beat as she caught Tim's bright blue eyes and Raven knew that the world seemed to suddenly shift. And it was not because of the alcohol. Looking back, Raven knew she was damned that night.
It happened in slow motion, her mug gently being pulled out of her hands and blindly pushed onto the shelf next to her.
The kiss just happened; Raven told herself as she would later look back at this particular moment. She wasn’t sure who leaned in first and when, but when somehow Tim’s warmth just seemed to just press into her skin and blue eyes grew just a tiny bit darker, studying her in a mixture of want and curiosity, she took the invitation.
Lips pressed into hers, gentle and probing, and her fingers curled into the front of Tim’s uniform as she tried to steady herself with every kiss. A breathy sigh escaped her lips, and she took more – because as a half-demon, she still liked to take. She liked to be greedy sometimes. Her emotions purred in delight at the attention.
Fingers were gentle against her hips, guiding her up against Tim’s door, pushing them flush against each other. Their kisses were gentle, probing, and tentative, gently taking stock of each other. She felt him inhale deeply, emotions warm and needy pressing into her skin, and Raven’s stomach jumped in delight at the curious want that pressed into her. Tim pulled away, fingers still pressing into her hips and his blue eyes a mixture of surprise and searching. His breath stuttered as he seemed to come to his senses but to Raven’s mild curiosity, he did not fully step away. His breath fanned over her cheeks, warm and inviting.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered and released a shuddering breath. His fingers twitched her hips. His shifted gently but did not step away, Raven’s fingers still curled into his uniform, as if keeping him in place. “I shouldn't,”
“Tim,” she whispered, cutting off his apology and her fingers tightened around the folds of his uniform. She was already wrapped up in whatever this was. His keyed-up emotions pressed into her, needy and wanting — she felt her body warm at the attention. “It’s okay,”
She watched him swallow, studying her with wide blue eyes and a storm of emotions. She could feel how his emotions seemed to expand and sizzle under his skin. Raven found herself eagerly taking in every bit of his warm emotions. “Is this okay?” Tim asked, his voice barely above a whisper, repeating her words into a questions they seemingly both already knew the answer to. His fingers pressed into her hips just a tiny bit tighter in anticipation. Want.
Raven knew this was going to crash and burn so badly. She knew she was going to burn in hell. But she's been to hell once or twice, and there was a want she was curious to full. The attention was tantalizing, so —
"Yes."
He stole her breath. He drew gasps from her lips expertly, greedily drinking them in and taking them as his own. Tim’s kisses were long and deep, eagerly drinking every breath she had to offer and taking it as his own. Raven felt her knees weaken at the want and attention.
There was a hunger, a need, a blaze of sudden emotions that seemed to erupt from Tim that caught Raven off guard. But as Tim pressed into her, fingers slipping under her night shirt, she eagerly responded to every lick of Tim's inferno. She was all but happy to respond to his attentive ministrations, eager to give back what has been given.
Lips and teeth scraped against her neck, and her toes curled into his carpet the delicious sensation. She released a breathy sigh as calloused hands under her shirt slid across her skin just above the beginnings of her shorts and slid to the small of her back. She arched into his touch just teeth scraped the underside of her chin.
"Tim," she breathed, gasping as his hand slid over her ass. He cupped her ass and whimpered into his lips as he pushed her into his hips and they rocked into each other. Her demon purred in delight at the hard friction.
Fucking hell.
Whatever reservations Raven had gone out the window. There was no going back. Ever. Not in this lifetime. She groaned as teeth sunk into her lips and thirst just practically bathed her. She basked in the attention, and she felt Tim’s emotion hum, eagerly taking in her own ministrations. As fingers slipped and dipped over scars and muscles, and they slowly unwound each other, perhaps they were just two starved souls eager for touch and attention.
To Raven, it was addicting.
Her whole body seemed to slowly burn as they continued to rock into each other, pressed up against Tim’s door. It’s been so long since she’s been consumed like this, and every bit of her was eager to consume and be consumed.
One of Tim's belts pressed painfully into her stomach, and she blindly fumbled to try to remove it. Releasing an unsteady breath, Tim stopped his exploration around her neck and helped her remove the offending belt. When it fell to their feet, they stared at each other momentarily, seemingly coming to the realization of how real the moment was.
The belt was not enough.
Raven knew she was fucked anyway as she lurched forward, eagerly responding to Tim's hungry emotions. Her fingers began finding clasps and zippers, clumsily removing the top of his suit.
They somehow managed to stumble back to his bed, clumsily crashing onto its edge. Before either could catch their breath, Raven climbed onto his lap, pleased at the surprise on his face.
Taking charge, Raven kissed Tim, leaning over him and allowing her hands to drag over muscle and scars. She drank his groan and rolled her hips into his teasingly. Large hands steadied her hips, guiding their movement as they continued to kiss and slowly stoke a fire that all but started to consume them.
Raven leaned back when breathing became difficult and she stared at Tim, taking in his dark blue eyes and his wild hair and the sheen of sweat that started to build over his shoulders and chest. There was an electrifying need that burned her skin.
She watched Tim blink, determination and hunger washing over his face, and with grunt he reached for her face and cupped her chin. Calloused fingers tilted her chin and with a determined glint in his eyes, he leaned closed and kissed her, wrapping his other arm around her waist, and simply consumed her.
Her body burned and Raven could feel her emotions purr at Tim’s kisses. She could feel heat pool low in her abdomen and she rolled her hips into his lap, earning a sharp nip to her lips and a low growl. Her fingers slipped in-between them, and she again blindly fumbled with the rest of his uniform, trying to unclasp his pants.
Large hands wrapped around her wrists, stopping them as she found the complicated zipper and clasp to Tim's tactical pants. Raven blinked and stared at Tim, his erratic breathing fanning her cheeks and his gaze suddenly studied her again over the haze.
"Raven," he whispered, as if in warning.
There was a fine line, Raven realized. If they'd cross it, Raven knew there was no turning back. But then again, they seemed to have crossed it already that evening.
Fuck it.
She was damned anyway.
Raven’s lips curled into a smile, her inner demon purring in delight as she felt Tim's anticipation grow. She returned Tim stare, tilting her head, and waiting for his own move. "I said I'd help," she repeated her words that evening.
Raven watched Tim swallow, processing her words, and just studying her for a moment. He eventually grunted, lurched forward, and caught her lips in a searing kiss. Raven’s hands busied themselves in between them, finding the intricate clasps to his pants and fumbled with his pants.
"Raven," Tim sounded like a wounded animal, his groan guttural as he released her lips with a wet pop just as her finger dove into his tight pants and wrapped around his throbbing member.
They struggled for a moment, shimming his tight pants down his hips, and fully releasing his erection. Raven squeezed him, fingers gliding over the thick length and absolutely enjoying the groan that filled the air. His silky member throbbed in her hands, and she watched in satisfaction as Tim’s eyes rolled back and his Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed another gasp. Heat began to pool low in her abdomen as her gaze slid from the pure ecstasy on Tim’s face to the growing length in her hands, and she continued with her gentle ministrations of pumping his length.
“Raven,” Tim groaned and capturing her lips in a clumsy kiss. He released a shuddering breath into her lips as Raven squeezed and he retaliated by firmly squeezing her hips, tips of his fingers dipping into her sleep shorts. “Didn’t I say you needed to rub one out?” she whispered into his ear, her hand gliding over him.
“An excellent suggestion,” Tim whispered into her neck, voice tight as Raven continued to pump his cock.
Calloused fingertips eventually dipped into her shorts, sliding over the swell of her ass, and firmly squeezed her, drawing a whimper out of Raven’s lips. They bucket into each other, and Raven felt that the heat of the room was stifling.
“Tim,” Raven whimpered, acutely aware of fingers slipping under her shirt and hands dragging up her body. Releasing a soft gasp against Tim’s lips and she practically reveled in the heady emotions that consumed them.
A calloused thumb just swiped the underside of her breast, teasing and Raven’s breath stuttered. Her body buzzed with emotions, and she tumbled into Tim’s chest, cheeks pressing into his as her emotions simmered. His erection throbbed in between them, she felt a warm wet patch against her stomach from his pre-cum. She shuddered in anticipation.
“Are we—,” Tim breathed, fingers pressing into her ribcage and thumb stroking the swell of her breast. She heard him groan against her ear and squirm under her, trying to hold on the last bits of composure. Their want was all too consuming, but he held on to his last bits of control, evert the gentleman he was. “Raven, is this –”
“Yes,” she whispered, hating the way it sounded like a desperate whine. She scrambled off his lap and Raven practically purred in satisfaction as she saw Tim watch her undress, his blue eyes dark and hooded. She stood in between his legs, dropping her shirt and underwear and she could feel her emotions preen in delight as Tim grabbed his cock and gave himself a few strokes. The air was thick, smelling of sweat and desire and sex.
This was wrong, so terribly wrong, Raven knew. But this would be something she’d take care of later – now she’d just wanted to be thoroughly consumed. His need and desperation were fueling her own desires that had her scrambling back into his lap and eagerly pressing into Tim, stealing a searing kiss that left her lungs burning and begging for more.
It was frantic and desperate, an visible need consuming them and burning every inch of their being. Raven hated how eager she was, happy to take in the gentle and greedy attention Tim offered her. Kissing every scar and hands fanning over her heated skin and holding in place as they continued to take from each other.
“Please,” she whispered into heated skin, her face pressing into Tim’s shoulder and she felt teeth sink into the crook of her neck. She rolled her hips into his lap, aware of his hot erection pressing into her abdomen. Teeth scraped against her neck, a low growl rumbled across Tim’s chest and Raven bucked into him.
It felt wrong, oh so wrong, when she grabbed his shoulder to steady herself and Tim helped her sink herself onto his throbbing cock. It felt wrong yet so right to lock eyes with him and watch his mouth drop open in pure ecstasy. It felt intimate and wrong, it was a moment Raven knew she had no place to take, but the heat and need were distracting and at this point, she knew they both just wanted to take and be sated.
The world seemed to melt away as she rode Tim, their movements rushed and frantic against each other. She felt Tim’s fingers press hard into her hips, keeping her steady and directing her hips in just the right angle to hit the perfect spot.
“Fuck,” Raven whined, she felt a searing heat pool low within her as Tim eagerly met every thrust and practically impaled her. Greedy fingers slid over her bouncing breasts, tweaking her nipples and hungry blue eyes eagerly watched her come undone. Raven greedily took Tim’s heady emotions, drinking them in and eagerly offering her own attention for him to take.
Their movements became more frantic as Raven inched towards the edge of oblivion, and she listened to Tim’s grunts as he pressed her hips into her, his own release closer with every heavy thrust. Her name came tumbling from his lips like a frantic prayer, which fueled the heat in her abdomen. “Please, Tim,” she whimpered, her legs shaking as her orgasm bloomed and the wet sounds of felsh hitting flesh driving her over the edge.
With a growl, Tim sat up and warped his arms around her hips, slamming her down onto his cock and Raven mewled. Fingers slipped in between their bodies and skilled fingers found her clit, easily throwing her over the edge.
Raven groaned, her hips blinding thrusting into Tim as she felt herself freefalling through an explosion. The world seemed to just disappear, and Raven felt herself wrapped in an inferno. She drank Tim’s whirlwind of emotions, readily catching his own orgasm and greedily drinking every last dredge of his heated feelings.
They sagged against each other, Tim tumbling backwards into bed and wrapping his arms around her and taking her with him. They gasped, breathing heavily against each other, slowly coming down from their delirious high. Raven felt her senses come back, her face pressed into Tim’s neck and slowly growing aware of her surroundings. She felt his erratic heartbeat against her cheek, drawing her back to reality.
Well fuck.
Tim’s cock throbbed in her, mockingly.
“Oh, wow,” Tim’s voice cracked, horse and just above a whisper in Raven’s ear. She felt the unsteady rise and fall of his chest as he tried to catch his breath. Raven lay sprawled over him, her legs wrapped around his hips, and he was still buried deep within her. Tim’s heartbeat and unsteady breathing were oddly secure and comforting.
As they lay there catching their breath, the world slowly came back to them. Their senses, too. The reality of what just happened slowly sinking in. Raven listened to Tim’s breathing as he tried to find the right words and his emotions finally caught up with him. Fingers twitched along her ass.
Raven hummed, acknowledging Tim’s loss of words. Very gently she pushed herself off him, shuddering as his cock slid out of her and she rolled to the side, suddenly incredibly aware of their nakedness and what just happened.
Raven lay on her back, still breathing unsteadily, and she watched Tim swipe a hand over his face. There was an unreadable expression on his face, matched by emotions she wasn’t quite sure to place. Tim lolled his head over to her, an unsure smile crossing his face. “Definitely not how I’d imagine the night to end,” he finally said, releasing a soft uneasy chuckle.
Raven curled her lips into a small smile, as they tried to find a way to navigate through the moment. “Well,” Raven drawled, bracing herself on her elbows and looking at Tim and his bundle of confused emotions. “I did say you should rub one out,”
Tim made a face and Raven watched his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed thickly while mulling over his words. “Still not how I’d imagine that to turn out,”
Raven blinked and watched him curiously, her head tilting to the side. “It took the edge off,”
Tim looked confused and torn with his eyebrows drawn together, she was sure she looked equally as confused. “Raven,” Tim breathed, staring at her with a searching gaze. “I — we shouldn’t have,” he breathed. “I’m sorry,”
Part of her knew he wasn’t, she could feel it by the way his emotions still bubbled under her skin. His blue eyes were dark and there was a desire that seemed to shine in his eyes. Raven swallowed, relishing the desire and attention. She wasn’t sorry either. Her emotions purred, basking in the afterglow. “It’s alright,” she replied.
Tim’s face pressed into his gray comforter as he stared at her, his eyes searching. For a moment, he looked like any other young adult male, sprawled across their bed after a long night of sex. The image struck a chord in Raven, and she drank in the sight. “It is?”
Raven hummed, vaguely aware how her body still buzzed in delight at the surprised – and piqued interest. She allowed Tim to study her, unashamed at her nakedness. “It is,” she said and shrugged in afterthought. “We’re old enough,”
There was a line that was crossed that night, Raven knew. There really was no coming back from that line.
~
The second time was a coincidence.
It happened again close to a month after Raven’s night in Tim’s room. They surprisingly went on with their lives, brushing off the incident as a one-night occurrence. Raven refused to call it a one-night stand. Neither talked about it either. It just happened. She entered the Tower’s kitchen the next day, acutely aware of how sore she was and had breakfast with the entire team. Tim had called them in for training later in the morning, following their usual schedule like clockwork. Nothing remis.
Raven refused to think much of it anymore. There were far more important things for her to focus on - like Deathstroke, the Hive, and the occasional imminent doom of the world.
Their second, what was it – meeting? – happened at random, purely out of coincidence. If having consensual sex even was considered a coincidence. Though, honestly, it was perhaps just as much her fault as it was his.
She knew it was Tim even before spotting him in the dingy dive bar in the outskirts of Seattle. Vaguely wondering what he was doing here, in this particular bar in god knows where Seattle, she returned to her greasy fries and soda. Perhaps he won’t even notice her.
She absently went through her phone, scrolling through social media and the local news. Perhaps she could still catch one of the free concerts at the park. She absently noted that Tim, obviously not dressed as Tim Drake-Wayne in all his worn leather jacket, ripped jeans, baseball cap, and sunglasses glory, settled somewhere in the back.
Her solitude didn’t seem to last very long, when a very familiar energy approached her. She looked up from her phone after checking the latest concert schedules of the local art fair and watched Tim slide into the high stool next to her. He settled his cup of coffee on the bar table. Raven tilted her head curiously, watching a small smile play on Tim’s lips.
“Is this seat taken?” he asked.
Raven’s brows furrowed, watching Tim slide into the rickety seat. “It is now,”
Tim hummed in acknowledgment and Raven watched him take a drink from his coffee, briefly glancing over her shoulder before beaming at her. Of course, work. “I’m Alvin,”
Raven hated that disguise. Alvin Draper. What a strange name. Raven fiddled with her half-empty soda, mindlessly tapping at the glass. “Rachel,”
Tim smiled; she could barely see the way his eyes crinkled in mild amusement. “Nice to meet you,” Tilting his head curiously, he looked genuinely confused. “What brings you here?”
Raven shrugged. “I’m on vacation,” she said with a point. “Got a week off from work for the culture festival here in Seattle.” The corners of her lips lifted teasingly, and she caught his stare as Tim obviously now remembered the vacation time she filed for. “I was hoping to get some time away from work and enjoy my time at the festival,” she watched Tim smile. Propping her chin on her hand, she thoughtfully popped a fry into her mouth. “My boss can be a pain in the ass sometimes, this break is really nice,”
Tim released a bark of laughter. “Right, I’m sorry,”
Raven rolled her eyes and took a swig of her soda. Leaning in just a little closer, she hissed. “You better not blow this place up,”
Tim laughed, more for show than anything else. “I won’t,” he mumbled. “I’m here for the festival too,” he said normally.
Raven looked unimpressed and pressed her lips into a thin line. “What a coincidence,”
In between staged laughs and casual conversations, Tim explained that he was tailing a lead. An international smuggling syndicate had set-up shop in Gotham and nano-tech trade seemed to happen at random points across the US. One of the syndicate's liaisons was scheduled to meet a few associates in this bar. He explained he’d been tailing them for a while now. Strange how their paths crossed – out of all the places and out of all days. Raven just hoped she’d not be asked to help. There was a bibliotheca she wanted to visit in the morning.
“What are your plans tomorrow?” Tim asked, while glancing over her shoulder and watching the group of men in the back. She watched him tap on his watch, obviously recording whatever the conversation was back there.
“There’s a library I want to see tomorrow. Some old scripts and books,” she explained.
Tim hummed, only half listening. He glanced back at the group. “Fascinating,”
Raven snorted, mildly amused to have caught him at work. “You barely even listened,”
“Old books and scripts,” Tim said, throwing her an amused glance. He was about to continue when he paused and stared at the group again. Out of the corner of Raven’s eyes she could see movement and a discrete exchange happen. Tim took a thoughtful swig of his coffee.
“What are you looking at, punk?”
So much for tailing his targets. Tim turned to Raven, schooling his face and throwing her a charming smile. They ignored the movement of Tim’s targets behind them. “I’d like to kiss you,”
Raven rolled her eyes and nodded. Tim owed her for messing with her vacation. Ignoring the familiar tingle that ran down her spine, she watched Tim hop off his chair and confidently walked up to her. Maneuvering herself away from the table, she allowed Tim to step up to where she sat and stand in between her legs. With purpose and confidence that took her by surprise, Tim drew her in for a kiss.
It was for show, to get his targets off his tail. Public display of affection always made people uncomfortable, even criminals. Raven wrapped her arms around Tim’s shoulders and returned his kisses, sitting in the bar stool gave her a height advantage and she slightly leaned over Tim’s form. Her fingers curled into the hair at the base of his neck, and she ignored how familiar every touch and kiss increasingly became.
She felt his hands fan over the swell of her hips, fingers teasingly running along her hips and occasionally stroking exposed skin around her hips. Her stomach flipped at the familiar sensations, and she unconsciously leaned in further.
She tried to ignore how teeth sunk into her bottom lips, drawing out a soft gasp from her. Her fingers curled around Tim’s neck, and she leaned in just a tiny bit further, allowing him to tilt her head just the right way and swiping his tongue against hers.
There was movement behind them, and a group of men passed them. “Get a fucking room,” she heard one of them say. After a few more moments, they heard the distant sound of doors opening and closing. The bar was filled once again with dated country music.
Theoretically, they should have stopped at this point. The targets were out, the danger was over, and they had successfully averted blowing Tim’s cover. They should have stopped.
But they didn’t.
Tim continued to kiss her, his ministrations languid and thorough and eagerly drinking her every sigh. He had stepped closer, hands fanning over the curve of her neck and angling her face just the right way. Raven felt her skin tingle at the familiarity, and she tried to not lean into him too much – to no avail.
When breathing finally became an issue and her lungs began to burn, Raven gently pulled away. She silently wondered what the fuck just happened. They still kept close with foreheads pressed together and noses barely touching. For show Raven assumed in case some of the targets were still around. Feeling Tim’s fingers press into her neck had her shiver in a level of anticipation she shouldn’t even possess.
“Sorry,” Tim breathed, a jumble of emotions, and looked a bit sheepish. He pulled away, gauging her reaction. She felt the pads of his fingers press into her pulse point on her neck and Raven wondered why her pulse quickened. Blue eyes blinked, trying to clear the darkness in their eyes. Tim cast a brief glance at the door before swallowing, looking thoughtful. “We should go,”
We.
She watched Tim pull away, emotions a curious jumble. He stepped away from her, watching her response before taking his mug and drinking the last dregs of his coffee. He waited patiently, as she mulled over his words. We. An invitation.
It could well mean her helping him with whatever case he was working, her helping him keep up the front of a random girl he picked up at a bar. Perhaps this was true, whatever image he was trying to project, he needed to keep his cover. But she was also all too distinctly aware of the need that started to warm their skins.
Raven knew she should know better, she thought as she slid out of her chair and stuffed her phone into her pocket. She knew she should have better judgment but the tingle of excitement, a rush of something she shouldn’t be enjoying, had her following Tim out of the door and into the warm night of Seattle.
She was staying at the Grand Hyatt, a treat she booked for herself. She could have gotten off right at the corner of her hotel when Tim made the turn. But instead, she watched the hotel disappear out of view from her window and allowed him to drive them to his safe house.
His safe house was an apartment just close to the residential district of Seattle. It looked like a modern apartment, filled with tasteful furniture and the latest technology. It looked barely used, Raven figured Tim stayed at a different place if he’d come to Seattle for business trips.
She watched him go straight to an open laptop, insert a thumb drive and run a program. They barely spoke, beyond him giving some details of the case. There was a determined look on his face and a heat that simmered low underneath the surface. She watched from the doorway of the living room, the screen of the laptop illuminating his face in the otherwise dark room. There was an air of seriousness that lay heavily in the silence.
Raven leaned against doorframe, arms crossed and her nerves silently bubbling under her skin. She watched Tim type in his final command into the software, before straightening and looking over his shoulder and catching her stare. She could feel the edge in his nerves as he walked over, his stare intent as he studied her barely visible outline.
Raven shifted when he finally stood in front of her, her back pressed into the doorframe. She stared up at his face, trying to study his intense gaze in the darkness of his safe house. There was a nervous, on the edge, curious energy that hung thickly in the air and Tim’s emotions probed at her, making her head tilt curiously to the side.
Tim swallowed thickly and his fingers twitched on his sides. “Are we — are we doing this?” he asked, his voice a low rumble. Raven’s heart jumped at the invitation.
He stared at her, the sensation of his emotions both familiar and foreign all at the same time. They shouldn’t, Raven knew. She watched Tim inhale deeply, his chest rising and blue eyes dark with an intensity she can’t quite place. Her curiosity and anticipation got the best of her.
Curiosity killed the cat, she’d say.
Tilting her head, a small smile played on her lips in silent response, and she watched the relief and confidence just flood into Tim. Raven hummed, feeling herself loose to the anticipation and nervousness that filled her senses. “Alvin Draper did pick up a girl at a bar,” she said.
Tim immediately crowded her space, taking her confirmation and Raven felt her senses tip into overdrive. For a moment, they just stood there, pressed into each other, and feeding off each other’s energy. Raven felt herself warm as Tim studied her, his body on the edge and a curious energy just eagerly pressing into her.
His hands fanned over her hips, holding her in place, just as he tipped his face down to capture her lips in a kiss. She inhaled sharply as familiar lips pressed into her, the taste of bitter coffee invading her senses as his tongue slipped against hers in a needy kiss.
Pressing further into her, Tim’s kisses were practiced and surprisingly familiar, drawing out whimpers and sighs from her with practiced ease. He knew how to angle her head, press greedy fingers into her chin to angle her in such a way that had breathless and arching into him.
It was disorienting to feel this way. But Raven chased every needy kiss with one of her own, her curiosity and want fueled by Tim’s own confusing emotions. Teeth scraped against her lips and fingers dug into her hips that had her gasping for breath and whimpering into his mouth. Her hands wrapped around his shoulders like an anchor as Tim’s heady emotions had her tittering into a dangerous oblivion, she was not all too sure she’d wanted to leave.
They gasped for breath when their lungs finally burned, and Raven felt Tim’s ragged breath against her cheek and neck when he pressed his nose into her flushed cheek. Her skin tingled when their hips angled just the right wait and his hands had sneakily slipped under her shirt and pressed into her waist.
With a shuddering deep breath, Tim pressed a soft kiss to her cheek. “Your kisses taste so good,” he whispered into her ear.
Raven felt whatever fortress she built crumble. With a whimper she kissed Tim, fingers tangling into his hair and practically melting into him. She’d worry over her bad choices tomorrow.
They left a trail of clothes as Tim led them to his bedroom, hands exploring and each kiss more demanding than the last. They tumbled into his bed naked and breathless, emotions heady and delirious to Raven and she eagerly took every last dreg of pure want Tim had to offer.
“Tim,” Raven purred, she felt his cock slide over her warm core, and she involuntarily bucked into him, chasing for release. Heat bubbled low under her skin. She’d worry over their poor decision-making skills later.
“Shh,” Tim whispered into her lips. He nipped her bottom lip and pressed a hand into her hip, pushing her away. He suddenly rolled off her and pressed into her side, he hovered over her, and Raven suddenly felt extremely exposed as he dark blue eyes watched her.
His hand rested on her abdomen, fingers pressed into her hip bone and Raven watched him stare down at her, a dark twinkle in his eyes. “I didn’t get a chance to memorize you last time,” he said, his voice low. Raven felt herself burn under his gaze; his face illuminated by muted lights. Heat rushed through her, and she felt her core pulse. Holy fuck.
Tim studied her like an assigned case, he was meticulous and thorough. Fingers slid over every scar and dip, memorizing every reaction he could draw from her. Lips followed his curious trail over her body, leaving nips and marks in places that drew embarrassingly soft whines from her.
When his face disappeared between her legs and her world exploded around her, Raven realized that sinning was not so bad after all.
~
Three times, that’s a pattern.
It was, there really was no place for Raven to deny it. It was a pattern she unwittingly found herself entangled in. It was dangerous, she knew, but she knew neither of them seemed to think too much of it.
The third time wasn’t an accident, they did not randomly bump into each other at a bar, it wasn’t anywhere near a coincidence.
Tim just appeared at her door one night.
He stood in front of her door, his energy different – bright, on the edge, nerves, and a wanting Raven could easily identify. Raven swallowed at the press of emotions. It was past two in the morning, he looked freshly showered and different in his sweatpants and old Green Day band shirt. His lips lifted into a small tentative smile, and he seemed to study her for a moment, gauging her reaction.
“Oh,” Raven breathed, and her pulse jumped at Tim’s emotions. It had been weeks since their encounter in Seattle, she had not expected to see him given everything that was going on in his life. She blinked, trying to understand what was happening. “Hi,” she whispered.
“Hi,” he replied, and she watched him stand firm in front of her. His blue eyes studied her, waiting for her next move.
She shouldn’t have stepped aside, but she did. He shouldn’t have stepped into her room, but he did.
His shoulder brushed against her as he stepped in, she could smell the familiar scent of sandalwood from him.
The door closed behind them, and Raven vaguely listened to the door’s lock mechanism snap into place. She was all too aware of Tim’s energy pressing into her, a familiar buzz that settled under her skin.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he explained, his voice low. She knew she shouldn’t allow her skin to tingle and her heart jump at the confession. But the energy immediately changed in the room and Raven readily welcomed the change.
Raven hummed, the corner of her lips quirking just a little bit in teasing amusement. “Didn’t Alfred tell you that warm milk and honey are supposed to help you sleep?” she asked.
Tim released a soft huff of laughter and shook his head. “Not much of a milk fan,” he confessed lightly. His damp hair fell into his face and Raven thought how soft it looked – though honestly she shouldn’t even be thinking of this.
Tilting her head, she studied his playful smile. “So, you thought it’d be good to visit, at two in the morning?”
There was a pregnant pause between them, as they took the moment to stare at each other in the dimly lit room. She watched Tim tilt his head, as he spoke to her, studying her reaction. “I’m sorry, I could leave,” he told her, it sounded more like a challenge than an apology. Did he really want to leave? No.
The air seemed warmer. “Stay,” she said. Her nerves tingle at the sight of Tim’s smile. “You can do what you like, you can pick a book, browse the net on my laptop, play some games — there are couple of games on my shelf, or use my bathroom to have another shower, or,” she drew the word out teasingly and paused, her eyes twinkled in amusement. Tim laughed as if catching her thought. “Rub one out. I am going to bed though and look at some animal memes, my legs still hurt from today’s patrol,” she announced in mild amusement. She turned on her bare feet and walked back to her bed and climbed into bed. She was aware of Tim’s watchful stare, burning into her back. She suppressed a shudder, refusing to be the first to budge in whatever game they were playing tonight. Raven crawled into her bed and sat leaning against her padded headboard, her skin warm with anticipation.
Her dim bedside lamp cast a warm glow around Tim, shadows dancing across his face as he sent her an amused smile at Raven. “Thanks for the hospitality,” he teased. Raven snorted and grabbed her phone, barely even paying attention to the animal memes. Instead, she watched him with a mixture of intrigue and subdued excitement as Tim slowly walked across her room and towards her large bookcase. Tim studied her bookcase, amusement and interest emanating from him as his lips continued to curl into a smile. He knew she was starting.
“Really?” her voice carried over her still room, watching Tim pull out a book – Out of Oz by Gregory Maguire.
Tim held the book close to him and turned at his hips to look at her over his shoulder, feigned innocence on his face. Raven fought off her own small smile that threatened to blossom on her lips. Tim was insufferable. “I like Wicked,”
“There are two other books that come after Wicked,” she told him. Raven watched him hum and briefly glance at the copy.
“I know,” Tim said. “Son of a Witch and A Lion Among Men,” he told her. Raven tilted her head and the corner of her lips lifted as she caught his deep gaze. Her insides jumped at the announcement; she wasn’t all too sure what to make of this new knowledge of his reading choices.
“You can borrow it if you like,” she told Tim. She watched his smile grow at the offer.
“Thanks,” he told her and tucked it under his arm. He turned to starting at her bookshelf, studying the books and knickknacks that filled its shelves. Raven paused the video of the sunbathing dog and watched Tim pull out her old scrabble board. Her brows furrowed as she watched him turn and approach her bed, the scrabble tiles rattling noisily in the box.
“Scrabble?” she asked and watched him sit down on the other side of her bed. Tim placed the old scrabble box on his lap along with the book he took from the shelf.
“Did you want to play?”
Tim’s blue eyes danced in amusement and a smile played on his lips. Long fingers rested on the edges of the scrabble box, fingers tapping the box absently. Raven glanced at the box, then back at Tim’s amused face. “You came here to play Scrabble?”
The mood shifted and the air that settled around them turned warm as Tim released a soft chuckle, his gaze steady and his smile unwavering. There was a teasing confidence around him that sent chills down Raven’s spine. “What did you think I came over for?” Tim asked, blue eyes dancing in her muted lights.
From the moment she first met Tim many years ago, she quickly learned how noticeably different he was from all the other Robins. Where most of them were cocky and loud, sure of their moves and their presence, Tim held a quiet confidence that easily captured an audience and took control of any situation to his advantage. In recent months, Raven learned Tim’s quiet confidence was enrapturing, he unwittingly could crawl under her skin, and she was quite possibly drawn to his presence every time.
His gaze was steady, as if waiting for her to make the next move. A challenge, like a board game of Scrabble, tiles laid out strategically. He knew the outcome though.
Raven released a soft laugh, realizing he knew what she was thinking. Placing her phone on her bedside table, she raised an eyebrow at him amusedly. Game on.
“Paint our toenails and gossip?” she offered. She slid under her sheets further, her covers reaching her shoulders and she stared up at Tim with a teasing smile.
Tim snorted ungracefully as he placed the scrabble board, book, and his phone on the bedside table on his side. Raven watched him hesitate for a moment, thoughts visibly running through his mind as his gaze switched between her and the empty space beside her.
Warm anticipation brewed as Raven caught Tim’s stare, a silent question in his eyes to which she responded with a small smile and rolling to her side, facing him fully. Tucking her right under her face, she waited for Tim to make his next move. Carefully, Tim slipped under her covers, blanket tucked over his shoulder and settled on his side to face her. He rested his hand in the little space between them, as they lay on their sides and studied each other with bated breath.
For a moment they stared at each other, Raven’s skin tingled as the air seemed thicker at their close proximity. She watched how Tim’s long hair fell into his eyes, a familiar image she’d seen intimately already. He looked awfully comfortable, albeit curious and hesitant, as he lay in front of her, taking his time to study her, as if memorizing.
“Is this —,” Tim paused, she felt him shift and inhale. His breath fanned over her face and their closeness sent a shiver down her spine. She felt the warmth of Tim’s right hand where it settled in the space between them, long fingers twitched under the covers. “Is this alright?”
“You coming over to play scrabble?” she whispered. They both knew that this was wrong. But —
Tim’s foot shifted, accidentally brushing against her own bare feet. She playfully nudged his foot away and she settled her own foot on top of his ankle. She watched him smile widen, a familiar glint in his eyes, and his intoxicating confidence she knew all too well seemed to seep into her skin. “Is that what we’re calling this?”
This.
Calloused fingers wrapped around her wrist, his hand shifting under the covers and grasping her wrist in a gentle hold. His touch sent sparks down her spine that had her inhale softly and desperately try to keep his steady gaze, she refused to be the first to budge and tumble headfirst into this. Whatever this was.
All Raven knew this was a damned game – and she was willing to play.
Raven shifted, her foot pressing into Tim’s and their knees brushing against each other. Her nerves seemed to vibrate. “Sure,” she relented, allowing herself to tumble headfirst into this.
“Good,” Tim said, his voice just a little bit thicker and he swallowed, waiting for either of them to make their next move. Calloused fingers slid up her arm and wrapped around her elbow, fingers pressing into her arm with an apparent want. He tugged gently and Raven felt his warmth and thick desires travel from the pads of his fingertips into her nerves.
Everything around them seemed to shift as the air became stifling and Tim’s emotions pressed into her, a slow burning hunger licking at her skin. His fingers twitched around her elbow and Raven felt her last resolve break. Fuck it.
She pushed Tim onto his back and unceremoniously straddled him, heat rushing through her body as hips slanted against each other and Tim’s hands immediately flew to her waist, holding her in place. Bracing herself against his shoulders, she eagerly consumed his heat and loomed over Tim with a playful smirk. “You should know I’m an excellent Scrabble player,”
There was a hungry glint in Tim’s eyes, and he returned her playfulness by gripping her waist more firmly and teasingly slipping fingers under her camisole. “Oh, I know,” he whispered.
Raven fully surrendered to the moment, to this. She knew when Tim tugged her down to kiss her, a hunger roared to life, and she wanted nothing more to be consumed by this. Future Raven could deal with the consequences of this.
For now, she wanted to feed this wanting and consume nothing but the fire that seemed to teasingly lick her skin. Teeth bit into her bottom lip and hands ghosted over her camisole, brushing over her breasts, and tweaking her nipples into tight peaks. Raven whimpered as their hips rolled against each other, their need more apparent and without any hesitations, unlike before.
Removing clothes and pressing needy hands into scars, tight muscles, and dangerous dips has since become muscle memory, practiced, and done with little hesitation. There was no hesitation when Tim rolled them over, pressing Raven into her bed and stealing her breath with another long kiss that left her breathless and arching into him. She relished the tight press of his naked body into hers.
True to his promise of memorizing her, Tim knew where he could draw the longest gasp or how to make her breath stutter. His kisses and touch were confident and practiced, pressing into her neck, and scraping over her pulse point. She dug her fingers into his shoulder, pressing into him and whimpering for more. Their movements were confident, drawing out gasps and moans from muscles and folds that they had since memorized.
A heat pooled low in her abdomen, fueled by Tim’s heady wants and desires. Raven whimpered and wrapped her right leg over Tim’s hip, seeking for release as his emotions slowly all but consumed her.
Practiced fingers slid down her side and Raven listened to Tim inhale sharply just when his fingers brushed her folds and her own fingers curled into hair in response. “Tim!” Raven gasped and her legs spread open further, her core aching and throbbing as Tim continued to tease her, pressing fingers into her in a way he seemed to have memorized well.
“Fuck!” Raven groaned, unable to control herself as her emotions bubbled over and an inferno all but consumed her. Tim’s fingers slipped into her, curving just the right way, and filling her out and stretching her. She bucked into him, desperately seeking for release.
Tim released a shuddering breath into the curve of her neck and pressed his fingers in her slick heat. “That’s 13-point word, Rae,” he hummed into her neck and gently bit into her skin. Raven released a soft chuckle which quickly dissolved into a groan when Tim picked up the pace and thrust his fingers into her.
Raven felt herself tittering close to the edge, her hips eagerly keeping pace with Tim’s fingers. She felt the fire in belly burn her nerves and she eagerly drank Tim’s own emotions, spurring her on for more.
“Please,” she whimpered, when she felt the hot pressure build up inside of her and slowly melt the world away. Her body groaned for release.
Tim growled and pulled his fingers out of her. He grabbed her hips and pulled them closer. Whispering her name like a mantra, Tim grabbed his cock and slid into her. They groaned as Tim bottomed out, his familiar girth and length stretching her out and filling her.
Raven felt the world just disappear as she welcomed the feeling of being consumed in a mad inferno. Tim thrusted into her at a strong pace, determined to sate their hunger and take them over the edge. His thrusts were unrelenting, long determined strokes that were confident and practiced – Raven moaned as he hiked her leg up higher and angled her hip to furiously hit the perfect spot he knew well.
Kisses and hands became greedier and needier as fingers twisted nipples and kisses muffled moans. Raven groaned, drinking in Tim’s hunger, and eagerly welcomed this onslaught of emotions. Her inner demon purred in delight, greedy for more.
Tim hiked her leg over his shoulder and groaned loudly when she squeezed around his cock in response. “Oh god, Raven,” he whispered into the skin of her shoulder, shuddering as hips snapped against each other in a frantic rhythm.
Gripping Tim’s shoulder, Raven felt her leg jostle and bounce over Tim’s shoulder, their thrusts growing more frantic as they chased after their orgasm. “Harder!” she gasped, and fingers dug into Tim’s hips, pulling him closer - if possible.
The wet sounds of flesh hitting flesh filled seemed to fuel their frantic pace and spur on their need for release. Tim picked up the pace and all but plowed into her – drawing long whimpers and groans from Raven. Raven felt her world slowly burn as Tim brought her closer and closer to the edge, his strokes long and hard, filling her to the core and just driving her senses mad.
With a soft growl, Tim slammed into her, his thrusts deep, constantly bottoming out and filling her. Raven felt the world burst into hot stars and she felt herself being swept away by a sea of hot emotions and just thrown into oblivion. Everything around her muted and she eagerly consumed Tim’s own orgasm as he frantically thrust into her, their combined emotions throwing her over the edge. Raven mewled in delight, legs wrapping around Tim’s waist and greedily gripping Tim’s throbbing cock, drinking every last dreg of his heat.
“Raven,” Tim breathed, collapsing on top of her. Raven wrapped her arms around Tim’s sweaty form, relishing their closeness and allowing them both to collect themselves from the high.
Raven felt Tim’s frantic heartbeat against her chest, and she listened to his unsteady breathing, silently delighted to have caused this pure exhaustion. Her fingers pressed into the scars of his back, and she enjoyed the heavy press of his body into hers.
When sounds of the world slowly returned to them and their breathing leveled out, Tim gently rolled off her. Raven shivered at the loss. “Fuck,” Tim breathed, still out of breath and relishing the after-sex high. Not bothering to think over the consequences of the lines they officially crossed that night, he gently tugged her closer and wrapped his arms around her.
“That’s a double word score now,” Raven mumbled into his chest, teasing him gently. She felt Tim chuckle, his laughter a low rumble in his chest. They basked in the moment, Raven eagerly taking every little emotion Tim had to offer.
Fingers squeezed her hips and legs tangled into each other. “I’m starting to like Scrabble,” Tim mumbled into her shoulder. He pressed a gentle kiss into her collarbone.
It was a terribly dangerous declaration, Raven realized. But it was one that was dangerously tempting – something that made her inner demon purr in satisfaction – and one that she’d eagerly play. Consequences be damned.
How one night close to five years ago would change everything for Tim and Raven.
~~~~
Chapter 1
“Hey, I’m in Gotham,”
The message seemed strangely out of the blue to be sent at 4:23 in the morning, but when he saw the ID on his phone Tim sat up in bed and stared at the screen. Whatever dregs of sleep he felt disappeared instantly.
Rachel R.
Not wasting time, he called her. Raven picked up on the second ring.
“Hey,” her voice drifted through the phone, her voice soft and familiar.
“Hey yourself,” Tim greeted, smiling into the phone and slowly rolling out of bed. It was nice to hear from Raven again after all those years. After she quit the team, they barely heard from her. Raven said she wanted a normal life, away from their superhero work. While with the Titan’s she had gone to a community college in San Francisco and it didn’t come much of a surprise she got into grad school right away on an academic scholarship. “It’s been ages,”
Raven hummed, her voice just a little distant. “Yeah, it has. Sorry for the early morning text,” she said. He could hear her moving around, plates rattling in the background. Probably preparing her morning tea, he thought. He could picture her making her favorite blend of herbal tea, the memory of her in the Tower still familiar to him.
Tim entered his own kitchen and placed her on speaker as he started preparing his coffee. He set his phone on the large granite counter. “Don’t worry about it,” he assured and started puttering around in his kitchen. “What brings you to Gotham? Do the others know?”
There was a brief pause from the other line and Tim stopped dumping heaping portions of coffee into his old coffee maker. Multi-millionaire and he still had yet to buy a decent espresso machine. His brows furrowed at the silence.
“Just some personal stuff,” Raven finally replied. There was some distant noise and a door closing in the background. He heard the line rustle with her movements.
“I see,” he breathed with piqued interest. In the last five years or so, Raven barely stayed in touch. She kept the team updated on her travels across the globe, but barely delved deep on her personal life beyond her life as a research assistant and her latest whereabouts. This was new. He knew that Raven’s mother was originally from Gotham and with the ex-Titan wandering around the globe, he assumed she had some business to take care of.
“Do you need help with anything? Are you alright?” he asked, suddenly standing still and waiting for her reaction. Worry laced his tone and he tried to pick up anything that felt out of the ordinary. “Just say the code,”
Raven released a soft huff of laughter, the sound familiar to his ears and he visibly relaxed around his coffee. She did not sound in distress. “I’m fine,” she said.
Tim stared at his phone waiting for her to continue as a pregnant pause filled the air. He heard her line rustle again. “Raven?” he prodded gently.
“Sorry,” Raven breathed. “Got a little distracted,” she said over the clatter of plates. He wondered where she was. That sounded way too much china for just morning tea, breakfast perhaps?
“How long will you be in Gotham?” he asked. Tim checked the time on his phone, making sure he still had enough time to get ready for work and make it on time. He had a meeting with R&D in the morning and he had hoped not to come in late today.
Raven hummed. “I’m not sure, for a while, I think,” she said.
Tim frowned at how distracted she sounded. He wondered if she truly was alright, her voice seemed distant. “That’s great. You think we could catch up?” he asked while picking up his phone and coffee and heading back into his bedroom to get ready.
“Actually, yeah, that’s why I’m calling,” replied Raven, there was a waver in her voice that Tim could not quite place. “Do you think we could meet up?”
Tim blinked, mildly surprised at the offer. “That’d be great,” he said, hiding the surprise in his tone. How strange for Raven to initiate a meet-up. His curiosity picked up and he blinked at his reflection in his bedroom mirror, mildly wondering why she wanted to meet up. Raven barely did social calls. “When?”
“Are you free later, after work?”
—
While Monday’s were always terrible, Wednesdays were the worst for Tim. Mid-week meant meetings with the Audit department, review of project proposals, a stack of finance documents to review and sign, and project update meetings, and business planning for the new joint venture. Lunch was something he hardly tasted, barely touched it and had it whisked away from him as fast as it arrived. The rest of his Wednesday was spent neck deep in reports, Tim had barely some time to breathe.
His stomach churned from either hunger or his nth cup of coffee today. Or, he chalked it up to the curiosity that came with seeing his teammate after so long. While a million questions ran through his mind, Tim genuinely hoped that Raven was alright and in no way in any trouble. Social calls were hardly her thing.
Tim had just gotten back from work, surprisingly still daytime (a first in his entire career) and busied himself in the kitchen. Raven would drop by any minute, she had insisted on just coming over instead of meeting at a cafe. After throwing his suit jacket over one of the kitchen stools (a terrible habit he still had to outgrow, despite his age), he rolled up the sleeves of his white business shirt and prepared a plate of crackers. Alfred would have his head if he didn’t prepare at least something to nibble on for his guest.
It didn’t take long until his alarm system notified him that someone was outside the building, waiting to be let in. Briefly checking through his phone that it was indeed Raven, he buzzed her in. “Come on in,” he spoke through his phone, tapping a button and letting her through security.
When he made it to his front door, he heard Raven softly knock against the reinforced door. Swinging open the door, Tim smiled. “Hey,”
Raven looked the same from how he remembered her five years ago. Her hair came longer now, black hair cascading past her shoulders. Her ruby jewel on her forehead was gone and turned into a pendant. Dressed simply in a pair of jeans and stylish black sweater and oversized jean jacket, Raven smiled at Tim.
“Hey,” she mumbled, familiar blue eyes bright as they stared up at him. Raven sounded the same, and much to Tim’s relief he noted no signs of distress. Perhaps he was just overthinking everything.
“Come in,” he said, stepping aside to allow her to pass through and moving to close the door after her. He stood awkwardly by his now closed door and watched her briefly glance at the tastefully decorated hallway. For a brief moment he panicked, unsure what to do — could they hug? Was she okay with hugs now? Was a handshake okay? Or should he just wave?
Raven seemed to sense the mild awkwardness and she stepped into his space and took him by surprise and hugged him. “It’s good to see you,” she mumbled into his shoulder, she barely came up to his chin as she stood on her tippy toes.
“Raven, it’s been years,” he chuckled and squeezed her small form. Tim wondered if she had gotten smaller, if that were even possible.
Raven hummed in agreement and stepped out of the hug. She sent him a smile that didn’t quite reach the eyes, but then again, Raven barely smiled. He ushered her into the apartment, directed her where to hang up her jacket, and told her to take a seat in the living room while he went to get them something to drink.
“You really didn’t need to prepare anything,” Raven called after him. Tim laughed and shot her an amused grin over his shoulder. “What kind of host would I be if I didn’t offer my guest something to eat and drink?”
Raven made a face, her calm expression crumpling as she wrinkled her nose. “Host?” she teased.
Tim left her to her own devices, likely perusing his book collection along the large wall that led to his home office. When he returned moments later, sure enough he found her reading the backcover of a book. Little Women, First Edition.
“You know you can borrow anything you’d like,” he announced while setting the large tray with crackers and tea on the living room coffee table.
“It’s a first edition,” Raven noted in mild surprise, gently cradling the book to her chest. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen this before here,”
Over the course of their time together with the Titans, Raven had visited his apartment a handful of times. Each visit had her inspecting his book collection, commenting on his lack of classics, and how he could have impossibly not read every management book that lined shelves. (“Some of these look like they never were opened,” she told him dryly, eyeing a Peter Drucker book in amusement.)
“I took that from the Manor a while back,” Tim told her. “You could borrow it if you’d like,” he motioned her to join him on his ridiculously large leather couch. He set a steaming mug of tea, prepared to her liking (as far as he could remember), in front of the empty space next to him. “Now come here, have some tea, and you can pick books you can borrow later,”
Over the course of years he had known her, Tim easily spotted the brief moment of hesitancy that crossed Raven’s face. She hugged the book tighter to her chest and shuffled towards the couch and slowly sat down next to him, just a fraction of a distance away from him. He could smell the familiar scent of her lavender perfume. Setting the book on the table, Raven carefully reached for the steaming mug of tea and took a tentative sip.
“Well?” Tim asked, smiling and casually angling his body to face her, hoping to break the seemingly awkward silence that stretched through the air.
Raven smiled over the mug. “This is good, you remembered,”
Tim grinned teasingly. “Hard to forget when you chugged tea every hour of every day,” His smile grew when the tension left Raven’s shoulders and she released a small huff of laughter.
“As if you’re any different with your coffee,” Raven shot back.
They fell into an easy conversation, quickly catching up on the years apart. Tim learned Raven had traveled quite a bit over time, spending most of her time in Asia and Europe consulting on ancient literature research with local universities. She enjoyed her time in Europe and the slow travel to different countries by train. Tim thought it seemed very much like Raven to enjoy traveling at such a leisurely pace. This was the first time she was back in America after close to five years.
“So what brings you to Gotham?” Tim asked, after they shared a laugh over old memories of the Titans.
Raven blinked, and that distracted energy he noted from her came back. He watched her blink, the corners of her lips lifting tentatively as she shot him a brief glance before turning back to the now cold tea.
“It’s complicated,” Raven began and absently tapped the side of her mug. She stared at the plate of crackers, seemingly briefly lost in thought. Tim patiently gave her time to collect her thoughts, worry slowly brewing in the pit of his stomach.
“Raven?” he gently prodded.
“I have a daughter,” she announced without much preamble.
Tim blinked, genuinely surprised at the announcement. Well, that wasn’t what he was expecting.
“Oh, wow,” he breathed. He watched her worriedly stare at him, as if studying his reaction. “Congratulations, Rae. That’s awesome,” Raven offered him a small smile, she looked sheepish and inhaled deeply, as if collecting her thoughts. “This is great news,”
The corner of Raven’s lips curled into a wry smile. “Her name is Leila,” Raven carried on and suddenly broke eye contact. Tim watched her in mild worry as she absently stared at the orange teapot Alfred gifted him as a housewarming gift many years ago. “She’ll turn four this year. She’s a very smart little girl. She likes books, going to the park, going to the beach, playing with dolls and Lego, dancing, and drawing,” A fond smile plays on Raven’s lips as she thinks of her daughter. “She’s talks a lot and asks a lot of questions,”
Tim smiles as he pictures a little girl that looked exactly like Raven. The image couldn’t be cuter. His smile grows at the thought. “She sounds wonderful, Raven,”
Raven looked at him and caught his gaze, she smiled at him like any mother proud of her child. “She is,”
“You should have brought her with you,” Tim told her. Tilting his head curiously, he watched her body stiffen. “Who is looking after her while you’re here?” He paused, wondering if it was the right time to ask. “The father?”
“She’s at daycare,” Raven answered, not really answering his question. Inhaling deeply, Raven set her cold tea on the coffee table in front of them. She stared at it for a moment, as if seemingly studying the intricate patterns that danced on its surface.
“Raven?” Tim looked at her in confusion, worry again starting to creep up slowly in his stomach. Was Raven alright? Was her daughter safe? What was going on?
Raven blinked, breaking out of her stupor, and she looked up at Tim, an unreadable expression crossed her face. “When I said I wanted to leave the Titans for a more normal life, I guess I truly got that,” she said wryly. As if catching Tim’s concern, she caught his confused gaze and she swallowed the lump that formed in her throat. Tim had never seen Raven look so hesitant.
“When I left the Titans, I did not know I was six weeks pregnant, Tim,” she said. There was a brokenness in her voice in her confession that made his heart jump into his throat. His stomach churned uneasily as his mind began to process the information.
Raven’s eyes widened in alarm, as if sensing Tim’s jump of emotions. She watched him go rigid, staring at her in alarm. “I didn’t know, until a few weeks later. I guess half-demons show pregnancy symptoms late in the cycle,” she explained, her smile wry.
“Raven,” Tim’s voice sounded strained, as waves of emotions suddenly seemed to swell in his stomach. Thought after thought ran through his mind, how could he have missed a pregnant teammate? His stomach heaved.
“Leila has been asking a lot about her father,” Raven whispered. There’s a hesitancy and brokenness in her voice that made Tim worry even more. “She wonders where her father is and she’s such a curious child. And I can’t –” Raven paused, her voice wavering and her breathing hitched as she sensed Tim’s spike of emotions. Her blue eyes locked with Tim’s alarmed dark blue ones.
“She deserves to know her father. And her father deserves to know she exists,”
Tim’s ears started to ring as he finally processed the information. Six months pregnant once she left the Titans. Six months — “Raven,” Tim hissed, his breathing hitching and his chest tightening. He felt breathless, his ears continued to ring loudly, and it felt like the world was spinning out of control. A distant memory, clear yet faint crossed his mind, that had his heart stutter and suddenly his world titled to the side.
Fuck.
“Tim,” He heard her despite the mad ringing in his ears. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. She pressed on, her voice a mad mix of apologetic and panic. Her face crumpled into deep regret, her eyes trying to catch his panicked stare. “I tried to tell you —” she whispered and Tim felt his world explode.
Oh shit.
“But I couldn’t, I was scared, I didn’t know what you’d do, what the Justice League would do, I as afraid they’d take her away from me, I did not know how you’d react, you were with Stephanie again soon after, and I was embarrassed and just scared,” her words were a jumbled mess, her voice uncharacteristically rose with a mix of emotions. Her blue eyes shone with unshed tears. “I am so sorry, Tim,”
Tim felt like the wind was knocked out of his chest and he inhaled shakily, desperately trying to find air to breathe. “So she’s —”
“She’s yours,”
~~
Notes:
Well, so here's that. Just another wild idea I could not let go of. I had to write. I always wanted to explore the idea of Tim as a father, I knew he was good with kids and the idea kind of grew on me over time. I know I have a couple of other stories in the works, but this one I'll keep short, just so I can let go of this plot bunny that's been bothering me for a while.
I wonder how I two birbs will navigate parenthood together?
i actually think my arrangement of this chart flawlessly explains the logic behind the dynamic of any two characters listed character interpretation discourse over ur welcome all
Hi, everyone. Just popping in for a quick update. I got a few messages asking where I've been. Thanks for checking in! I've taken the last few months off, taking some personal time and finding some time to take care of myself.
My mom passed in December while I was out of the country. A few days prior to her passing our state was hit by a category 5 cyclone and pretty much flattened a good part of our country. Our home took a hit, but not as bad as those who lost everything. Shelter and electricity are still a problem for many. As a nonprofit worker, this hits hard. Doubly so when I lost my mom in the middle of it all.
I'm currently taking care of things at home, packing up dusty memories and cleaning out remnants of the past. These last few months have been wild.
My mom had dementia and it's insane to literally wait for death. Months before she passed, the waiting of what could inevitably would happen was excruciating. Now that she's gone, there's this inexplicable feeling -- kind of like roughly removing a bandaid and just waiting for the wound to air dry, hoping it'll heal faster. I'm still allowing wounds to air dry and I catch myself just blankly staring at healing wounds.
Thank you for checking in. I miss writing and I'm planning to get back to writing our favorite #TimRae stories in the days to come.
Tight hugs, everyone! I really want to put out another TimRae update soon. I promise it will come out. I miss our birb idiots and them trying to navigate feelings. 💜
I know a lot of you have been asking what happened between our favorite little TimRae birbs.
Well, here we are. We're slowing unpacking things. Slowly, I'd like to unravel this painstakingly slowly (I'm sorry!!) and put things into light little by little. Some things need to be drawn out, with the amount of history between these two. But today's chapter should cast a little light on things.
Here's Chapter 4
~~~~~~
Present Day, Gotham
Tam was furious when he told her to take all his calls just as he stepped out of his office for lunch. He wasn’t sure when he’d be back – or if he’d be back at the office later. He told her he’d work from home, if his schedule changed. (Was he hoping his schedule would change?) But Tim had promised an exasperated Tam that, yes, he’d go through the Tokyo contracts, and, yes, the budget would be signed by tomorrow afternoon. Yes, he really was going out for lunch and not slipping into tight fitting kevlar in the middle of the day.
Though all in all, despite his intelligence, Tim slowly started to doubt his lunch plans. He stared at Gotham Library with uncertainty growing heavily in the pit of his stomach. It was a terrible idea, he knew. But, when did a terrible idea ever stop him? God, he was on the edge.
It’s been a few days since his visit (break-in) at Raven’s apartment. For whatever reason, his nerves were killing him. He was unsettled. God, perhaps Jason was right – he needed to lay off the caffeine for a bit.
Sighing softly, Tim stepped out of his car and hurried up the old library steps before he would lose his resolve. He waved at the surprised receptionist in the lobby, not really bothering to stop to talk to her. Instead, he flashed her a patented Wayne smile, which seemed to do the trick and the flustered woman waved him along as he continued heading towards the third floor of the library where he knew the laboratory and conservation department was located.
Stepping through the large white doors and into the department, Tim briefly took in a spacious room with high ceilings and big tables with an array of books, equipment, and documents. Soft jazz music filled the air and he could see people’s heads move from the glass window that divided the main room from the main entryway.
The sole occupant in the room was a young woman with a Gotham University ID strap around her neck, the same one who pulled Rachel aside during that night at the gala. She was hunched over an old piece of parchment, busy dabbing away on the paper with a cotton swab.
“I’m looking for Rachel Roth,” Tim said, approaching the young woman.
The young woman hummed, not bothering to look up, too engrossed in whatever she was doing. Tim curiously stared at how she swiped the cotton swab across the edge of the frayed paper, silently wondering what that achieved. “I think she’s inside,” the young woman said.
Tim tilted his head curiously to the side and smiled in amusement. “Do you think I could see her?”
“Eh, do you have an appoi– OH,” Tim watched in mild amusement as the brunette blinked momentarily, staring up at him like he had grown a second head. He supposed he did stand out in his business suit. He smiled kindly at the woman, tilting his head ever so lightly for her to continue. “Mr. Wayne,” she breathed, staring at him.
“Hi,” he chuckled. When that didn’t get the response he hoped for, he offered her one of his smiles that usually helped close business deals. “I’m looking for Rachel?”
“Oh, yes!” the woman pushed herself away from the table, rolling her swivel chair away with a bit more force than necessary. “She’s in the main lab,” she said and stood up abruptly, ponytail aggressively swishing behind her. “I’ll take you to her,”
Tim smiled. “Thank you,”
“My name’s Alice, I’m a junior at GU majoring in Conservation Science with a minor in literature,” babbled the brunette, Alice, as they walked down the large hallway. Tim nodded politely, listening to her talk while curiously peeking into some of the rooms they passed.
“Here we are,” Alice directed to the large two-door entryway. “This is our main lab where we do most of our paper conservation work. The other labs are for art,” she explained, though Tim was barely interested. Through the glass panels, he could see Raven’s black hair and he was immediately reminded of his nerves as they leapt briefly.
“Yeah, it definitely looks glued together. Let’s look at what kind of glue they used or if we can get the compounds? That way we can find ways to remove the glue and separate all these sheets,” Tim watched Raven talk to a small group as they were leaning over a large scroll that lay on the huge white lab table. She held what looked like a scalpel close to the old paper, gently nudging at where the sheets were glued together. “Once that’s done, let’s study if we can give the paper a rinse and stop the acid from decomposing the paper.”
For a moment, Tim just stared from his spot in the doorway, taking in Raven’s blue dress and heels and the curious expression that crossed her face. A few strands of hair fell into her eyes as she turned and listened to one of her colleagues and everyone shared a laugh. He felt the oddly familiar way his stomach flipped, watching the smile dance across her lips – a rare sight he often enjoyed for himself. And it struck him how in her element Raven was.
Tim felt his breath catch. Just as Alice was about to announce their arrival and butt into the group’s conservation, Raven looked up and locked eyes with him. Of course, she must have sensed him as he stepped into the room. Surprise flickered in her blue eyes as she stared at him.
“Hi, sorry, to bother,” Alice next to him, smiling apologetically at the group. “Rachel? Eh, you have a guest?” She tilted her head towards Tim, not so subtly nudging her head his way and raising her eyebrows warningly.
“Mr. Wayne,” Raven breathed, a small smile played on her lips as she straightened and she schooled her face, slipping into Rachel Roth with ease.
"Hi, Ms. Roth," the formalities felt odd, grating against his lips, but Tim played along expertly and he smiled at her. He watched her stare at him, as if trying to figure out what he was doing here.
"What a surprise," she said, still staring at him as if trying to read him. Tim knew that look well, her blue eyes searching his face as if trying to find answers.
"Our meeting?" He lied, tilting his head ever so lightly and smiling at her. He watched her blink, a look of sheepish surprise crossing her face. Tim had to fight from smiling broader, watching Raven look sheepish, albeit fake, was always amusing.
“Right, my apologies,” she said. Glancing briefly at her colleagues, she nodded her head. “I think we’re good? I’ll be back later to help out. Hopefully we'll know the compounds by then.” she said before turning back to Tim and offering him a calculating gaze.
“Right. Let’s go to my office, Mr. Wayne,” Raven said, sparing him a brief glance and smile, before walking past him and through the doors of the lab. Tim followed her silently, listening to the rhythmic clicking of her heels against the tiled floor.
Tim spared her a glance, staring at the telltale signs of Raven’s mild confusion as her eyebrows barely drew in and her lips were pressed into a tight smile.
They stepped into her small office at the end of the hallway. It was bare, but tastefully decorated with a few plants and paintings. A standard desk with an obscenely large computer screen was set up close to one of the small windows. Tim could barely see one of the ugly stone gargoyles that were perched by the library entrance from her window.
Once the door was safely closed, Raven whirled around and sent him a confused look. “What are you doing here?” she asked, eyebrows drawn in utter confusion. Arms crossed, she studied Tim. “Do you need help with something?” She paused and looked over his shoulder. “With a case?”
Tim released a soft chuckle, unbuttoned his suit jacket and eased himself, uninvited, into her rather uncomfortable chair reserved for guests. The upholstery was old and uncomfortable and Tim wondered just for how long the chair had been in circulation. “Er, no,” he smiled sheepishly up at her, mildly amused at the sight of her drawn eyebrows. “I was wondering if you’d like lunch?”
Raven looked surprised and she gingerly stepped closer to the edge of her desk to sit down, presumably to digest what he just had said. “Lunch?” she repeated, arms still folded across her chest as if defensively. Tim thought that it was odd to see Raven this way – heels and business-like, and just edging on cautious.
“Yeah, you know. Something you eat sometime around 2-ish or so,” he explained, tilting his head just a little to throw a teasing smile at her.
The corner of her lips curled into a familiar amused smile and she uncrossed her arms, allowing them to rest on either side of her hips and gently grab the edge of her desk as she sat up and leaned towards him just a little bit. She narrowed her eyes and caught his amused stare. “Look at you, telling me to go have lunch. Who are you and what have you done with Tim Drake-Wayne,” she said, a teasing lilt in her voice.
There she was. Tim beamed, catching a brief glimpse of the Raven he remembered from years ago. His chest tightened at the memory of her and he quickly dismissed it. “I’m a changed man,” he told her.
Raven rolled her eyes and crossed her legs by her ankles, getting comfortable on her perch. “I doubt that,” she said, an air of finality in her voice that carried more than it intended to. They shared a brief glance before she huffed and shook her head. “Also, normal people have lunch at 12 noon, not ‘around 2-ish or so,’” she told him.
Tim shrugged. “So my timing needs a bit of work,” he said defensively. He stared at her, expectantly waiting for her reply. Silently wondering if she’d agree. Surely she wouldn’t say no to a friend, right? “So, lunch?”
“It’s quarter to two,” Raven deadpanned.
Tim wrinkled his nose. “Time is irrelevant,”
Raven made a face. “I’d like to think timing meals is important to avoid ulcers and other complications,” she countered.
Tim blinked, staring up at her amused expression and for a brief moment, he was reminded of their younger versions and their endless banter. Before he could allow himself to tumble headfirst into old memories, logical Tim laughed and forced himself to look at the much older version of the Raven he once knew. “Okay, you got me. My lunch game still needs work,”
Raven released a soft huff of laughter. “It’s vastly improved,” she assured him.
“So, is that a yes?” Tim asked.
Raven eyed him as she looked torn for a moment, her gaze drifting towards her office door briefly, without a doubt thinking of her team and her work. Her gaze settled back at him, an unreadable expression crossing her face as she sighed and pulled herself up on her feet. “Fine, but you better think of an excuse for my team,” she told him.
He shouldn’t have felt as excited as he was, but Tim thought it was alright considering they had not seen each other in years. Catching up was in order. Buttoning up his suit as he stood up, he threw her a winning Wayne smile. “Excellent. We can have a lunch meeting outside the library,” he told her.
Raven watched him, as if studying him for a moment, before sighing and rolling her eyes. “Fine,” she mumbled. Standing up, she grabbed her things – her phone and laptop satchel before joining him by her door.
They left without much fuss. Tim threw her assistant Alice a bright smile and nonchalantly informed her that they’d leave for a business meeting. Raven smiled at her assistant and told her she wouldn’t be back for the day and the team could leave early if they were done with today’s work.
They had lunch at Royal Thai’s, of course. The lunch rush was long gone and there were barely any people left in the restaurant as they entered. Out of habit, they walked towards their old table way in the back, the same table tucked away next to a potted mini-coconut tree.
They ordered their usual pad thai, fried chicken, pineapple fried rice, and an order of mango-sticky rice to share. As their familiar order arrived, Tim grinned at the familiar sight.
“Things really don’t change?” he mused while helping himself to a large drumstick.
Raven hummed, as if mildly agreeing. She helped herself to some pad thai, carefully adding a few more tofu cubes to her helping. “Maybe some things,” she said.
Tim sobered briefly, his chopsticks pausing as they tried to scoop up some fried rice. A lot did change, he realized, even if he unknowingly seemed desperate to look for remnants of the past.
Biting the bullet he was too nervous to ask, he eyed her curiously over their achingly familiar lunch. “So what did change?”
A lot, he learned. Raven learned to like running, she went on runs while at the university. She joined the New York City Marathon during her senior year and still goes on morning jogs in Gotham. She seemed to be a lot of comfortable around people, she had gone to parties while at NYU and her handful of galas. She learned how to shmooze more, a must at research fundraisers. Tim learned she briefly joined a Ayahuasca retreat in Peru, during that one period of time where he couldn’t find anything on her. She was vague about the spiritual retreat but laughed it off saying the effects of the psychoactive brew only lasted for a few minutes.
There was a curiosity and lightness about her that he remembered from many years ago, but at the same time, it was new to him. As she explained to him some of the research projects she worked on in Indonesia and Bulgaria. Raven has always been curious, ready to understand more of the world around her. Having this kind of freedom at her disposal seemed to give her a certain glow.
He learned that Raven had taken a liking towards knitting. It was a small hobby she had picked up, again, while at university, when finals were grating her nerves. Though she did admit that she was terribly at it. Her last knitting project resulted in a sweater with lopsided arms.
Tim pictured Raven hunched over her sweater, furiously knitting into the night. The picture made him chuckle.
She learned how to bake, albeit not perfectly. But this confirmed the sight of the KitchenAid in her kitchen. Her shortbread cookies were passable, she told him. But nothing to Alfred’s standards, the ones he liked.
“I’m sure they’re perfect,” he told her.
They shared a smile over the last bits of sticky rice, and Tim found himself desperately grappling for more information about her and her new life. There were years between them, and while it was still the same Raven who liked pad thai, books, glueing ancient documents together, and secretly enjoyed boba tea (and his terrible jokes), it still felt that there was a chasm between them and new things he had to relearn about her.
He watched her wrinkle her nose at one of his bad jokes, lips curling in that old familiar bemused smile masked by feigned annoyance. Tim silently knew he wanted, needed, to fill that chasm between them. The idea had his nerves pulsing under his skin and his stomach leap.
He always knew that bad ideas were terrible for him to jump headfirst into. But he always did.
~
Tim saw Ravan again, a few nights later. She knew he was there before he could fumble with her pathetic locks on her window. She was at the window, dressed in an familiar oversized Gotham Knights shirt, glaring at him with her bedhead hair.
“What the fuck do you want? It’s 3 in the morning,” she glared and watched him stumble into her bedroom. “On a Sunday,”
“I got shot?” he told her lamely, applying pressure to his left shoulder and trying his best not to bleed all over her carpet.
Blue eyes zeroed in on his shoulder and Raven exhaled loudly in exasperation. She stared at him, taking in his roughed up form (he and Jason had intercepted a drug shipment courtesy of Black Mask. They successfully stopped the shipment, albeit with a few scrapes and bruises. Neither were too keen on going to the Cave to get patched up). Tim watched her inhale deeply as she stared at him before turning on her heels and walking away from him.
“Strip, on my bed, let’s patch you up,” her retreating form announced. He watched silhouette silently pad out of her bedroom, likely out to retrieve her med kit. Not waiting to be told twice, Tim silently worked on removing his cape and cowl, along with the top of his uniform without aggravating his injuries too much.
Raven returned with her medical supplies and switched on her bedroom lights, bathing them in warm yellow light. She spared him a brief glance, watching him carefully drop the last of his uniform into one corner of her bedroom where was sure no surface would be stained with blood. Raven threw a towel on the edge of her bed and sat down, carefully disinfecting her hands and gathering necessary supplies to extract the bullet.
“C’mon, Boy Blunder,” Raven beckoned him over and Tim sat down next to her, right hand still pressed into his throbbing shoulder. She glanced at him, eyebrows pinched in displeasure as she took stock of his injuries. “Anything else I should know about?”
“It’s not as bad as it looks,” Tim breathed through the throbbing pain. It was just another Sunday morning, in his book.
“Seriously?” she breathed and swatted his hand away from his bleeding shoulder. “Is it a through and through?”
“Still lodged in there,” Tim winced as fingers gently prodded into the angry red flesh. He watched her frown as she stared at his injury. Dark blue eyes flickered to his light blues ones, and Tim allowed himself to take in the familiar sight of Raven’s displeasure over his injuries. It was an old picture he could never forget. “Okay,” he breathed, as Raven continued to stare, waiting for him to reveal more of his injuries. He knew that she knew him well enough to not disclose every injury. “Cracked a rib or two too,”
Raven sighed and rolled her eyes in clear annoyance, but he could see the whisper of a smile curling around her lips as her fingers worked deftly at removing the bullet and warm hands seeped familiar healing magic into his system. “Some things never change,” she breathed, her energy slipping underneath his skin and wrapping around him in that familiar warm way that he remembered from years ago.
~
Work at WE would keep Tim busy on most days, on other days he’d stop by at the library for lunch. 12ish, not 2ish.
He’d learned that taken an interest in art restoration, more than just restoring old papers and books. He’d enjoy listening to explain her work, going into detail about restoration work and her research on runes.
“So it’s not just glueing papers together?” he asked in amusement over the rim of his Thai coffee. Raven rolled her eyes at him in bemusement.
He learned, much to his surprise, she enjoyed cliff diving. She had told him she went a few times while in Indonesia. The cliffs were high and the thrill of jumping, without powers, was fun.
“It felt like it was a regular person,” she mused.
~
Tim was curious if she had dated, while away. The thought didn’t settle well with him, but he was curious. For reasons he would rather not confront, he wanted to know.
She did, though briefly. While at, again, university. He learned this while she was baking shortbread cookies one evening as he arrived at her apartment for a patch-up. His stomach flipped at the idea but he ignored the feeling immediately.
“Vigilante Half-Demon and civilians don’t really mix,” Raven chuckled and absently cut the shortbread cookie dough into squares. Tim released an absent hum.
From his perch at her kitchen island, he watched her pause and she stared at him with quirked lips. “How’s Steph?”
Tim blinked, not expecting that question. He stared at her, gaging her look as she silently waited for an answer. He and Step had broken up years ago. They were friends but whatever past they shared was just that -- in the past. Tim ignored the sudden tightness in his chest and he shrugged. “She’s good. I don’t see her a lot except on patrol. When she can. She’s working on her residency at Gotham General,” he told her.
Raven smiled and nodded. “Great for her,”
~
Tim stumbles into her apartment more often than he had planned. Oftentimes with casework he wanted her to look over, asking her for advice (“You know these cryptic messages better than us,” he told her once, when going over a recent case he helped out with the Justice League) but more often than not for healing injuries. He refused to go to the Cave. Some things never change, he supposed.
Tim had stayed over one night, on a night after a particularly bad encounter with Captain Boomerang that left him a little too raw and on the edge. After healing all his broken bones and injuries, she had offered him kindly if he’d like to stay the night. He looked dead on his feet anyway.
Raven looked up from watching the kettle on her stove as he stepped awkwardly into her kitchen, dressed in clothes that were achingly familiar.
“Looks like you grew a little,” Raven smirked just as the kettle whistled on the stove. Her gaze swept over his taller, larger form and her eyes danced in amusement.
Tim chuckled and tugged at his old Green Day concert shirt. He had not seen the shirt in years. He was dressed in his old shirt and sweatpants, both just a little too tight and both memories of clothes Raven had seemed to weasel away from him. “Yeah, well, that happens when you grow older,” he said while padding barefoot into her kitchen and depositing himself by her kitchen island. Despite her healing every injury in his body, he was exhausted.
Raven slid a steaming mug of tea his way and watched him gratefully take it. She eyed him in bemusement. “Carefully, you’re calling yourself old,”
“Hah,” Tim chuckled into his mug and carefully blew into it, taking a tentative sip. He kind of felt old, he’d admit.
Raven sat across from him, and carefully handled her own steaming mug of tea. A brief silence fell on them as he watched her glance at her open laptop next to her, she absently typed a few things into the machine with one hand. He had stumbled into her apartment earlier that evening while she was still working.
“What are you working on?” Tim asked her curiously.
Raven shrugged and shoved her Mac away from her. “Just my presentation for the lecture series at Gotham U. I have another class coming up,”
Tim frowned and absently tapped his mug. “I’m sorry to have bothered you,” he glanced at the laptop. “I could leave,”
Raven rolled her eyes and gently closed the laptop with finality. “Don’t be ridiculous. You can surprisingly barely stay away. It’s fine, I was done anyway. I was just going through some of my notes and finetuning some things,” she explained.
Tim sent her an amused smile. “Always the perfectionist,”
She threw him a wry smile. “Learned from the best,”
Tim chuckled into his tea. He glanced at her laptop again, curiosity piquing. “Do you enjoy teaching?”
Raven hummed and shrugged. “It’s nice. I don’t think I’d like to do it full time. Spending so much time with that many people in one place is a bit exhausting. I’m glad it’s just a special lecture series, nothing really graded, I’d rather not spend my evening grading papers,” she explained. Tim watched as a thoughtful expression crossed her face. “But it’s nice to have conversations with students and learn from each other,”
“Seems like you enjoy what you do,” Tim commented and ignored how that realization seemed to not settle well with him.
Raven shrugged absently, throwing him a small smile. Her fingers danced absently over the rim of her now warm mug. “I like it, but it’s a lot less exciting,”
Tim smiled. “Well, your spot with the Titans is still open,”
Raven tilted her head, staring at him and mulling over his words. “Thanks,” she said. “I’ll keep that in mind,”
Tim stared at her and felt the mood shift. Her blue eyes gazed at him briefly before drifting back to her mug and absently taking a small sip of her tea. “I mean it, Raven,” he said, and silently tried to leap over the distance that he had hoped to slowly close in.
The corners of her lips quivered just a little bit and she regarded him with an unreadable expression. “It’d be nice to see the team again,” she mused.
“Everyone misses you,” Tim said, his words weighing heavily in the air as they stared at each other.
He watched her finish the last of her tea with a heavy note, her shoulders a little bit more set and her gaze just a little bit more thoughtful. She blinked and stared at him. “Perhaps I should have been in touch more all these years,” she mused.
There was a pregnant pause as Tim watched her gaze at him, a wan smile playing on her lips, before dropping her gaze and thoughtfully staring at the potted plant in the corner of her dining room. “You had your reasons,” he told her carefully, and suddenly it felt like he was threading through thick waters, legs and arms heavy. Tim listened to her absently hum.
“I should have been more in touch, too,” Tim said, his chest suddenly just a little tighter at the sudden admission. The air just seemed a fraction of an inch thicker and he inhaled deeply, regret that had built up over the years suddenly crawling up his throat. He caught her gaze, as dark blue eyes stared at him, calculating and drinking in the swarm of emotions that suddenly bubbled up out of nowhere.
“Why didn’t you?” she asked, her question seemed like a stick gently prodding a sleeping hornets nest.
His throat tightened at the thought and Tim suddenly found himself tumbling headfirst into memories from years ago. His thumb dragged absently across the handle of his now cold mug, an action that seemingly tried to ground his sudden onslaught of thoughts.
“I was a coward. That was sutpid of me. This is all on me,” he told her, heavily.
Raven blinked and did not look away as she stared at him, taking in his admission. Her brows pinched in that familiar way when she would mull over her thoughts. “You kept your tabs on me. You had every chance to say hello, but you didn’t. You knew exactly where I was, all the time,” she told him. She didn’t sound accusing, she just said things how they were.
Tim swallowed thickly as guilt seemingly clawed at him. He tried to navigate and find the right answer, but at the same time he knew that they both knew the answer to her point. The answer settled low in his stomach.
He sighed and blinked, watching as a Raven offered him a tired smile. He knew she knew. “Why didn’t you?” he asked suddenly, asking before he could think and retract the question. He watched her blink thoughtfully and briefly look away.
She turned back to him, her lips quirking into a wan smile. “Maybe I was just tired of begging for scraps. Maybe I was tired of waiting at a possibility that could never happen,” she told him.
Tim felt his shoulders tighten the chasm that he had so desperately tried to close between them seemed to suddenly reopen, and he watched, with a tight, pained smile at how he was reminded of the distance that was all his – their – fault.
You're killing me. You're killing me and I LIKE it. Heathen.
Eeeeep, there will be more? I am absolutely in love with the idea of creating an inferno for these two idiots and it will most definitely burn us all alive.
Because there is so much history to unpack between these two. I love layering on history and drama very thick.
So here is some adult nonsense for our favorite TimRae birbs. Enjoy, my loves, the complicated storm that lies up ahead. This is just the beginning. If you're confused over what happened, oh boy, you just wait. These two are some work.
Chapter 3 is Here.
~~~~~~
Past, Titan’s Tower
Her phone rang incessantly, cutting through the stillness and quiet of her room and waking her up with a jolt. It was her personal line, the encrypted one. Raven blinked and stared at her dark ceiling, trying to see through the cloud of sleep that still blurred her sight. She listened to the crescendo of her phone’s ringing, wondering if she should answer or not.
The ringing stopped just as she was about to roll over and Raven paused. She lolled her head towards her bedside table and stared as the light of her phone’s screen died. Perhaps she could fall back to sleep.
Her phone suddenly vibrated again before ringing loudly, its melodic tones dancing through the air and forcing her to wake up. Sighing loudly, Raven rolled over and clumsily grabbed her phone, nearly knocking over her tea cup and dropping her phone.
“What?” she croaked into her phone, sinking into her pillows sleepily.
She heard the distant sound of someone breathing on the other end. Had it been anyone else, she’d have half the mind to just end the call and go back to sleep. Instead she blinked and stared blankly up at her ceiling waiting for a response.
“This better be good. It’s 3 in the morning,” she grumbled.
“Hey. What are you wearing?”
Raven woke up, immediately. She felt her nerves tingle and her fingers tightened around her phone as she frowned angrily at her ceiling. “Are you fucking kidding me, Tim?” she hissed.
“What are you wearing, Raven?” The voice hummed.
There was a breathy intake of breath and Raven could practically hear Tim smile into his phone. “It’s 3 in the morning. I am not having phone sex with you. Go to sleep or jerk off, I'm going back to sleep, asshole,"
“Are you angry?”
“No shit, genius,” Raven frowned into her phone, rolling over to her side as the last dredges of sleep seemed to slowly dissipate. What a fucking asshole, this was the last time, she thought angrily. “You’re gone for over a month, you leave the team without even a word, and now you call for phone sex? Are you fucking out of your mind? Don’t you have someone better to call for phone sex instead of me at 3 in the morning?”
“Raven —”
“No. This team is hanging on by a thread, Tim. Connor and Cassie had a fight and it’s been affecting the whole team. Rose and I have been putting out fires left and right. I swear, we’re at our wit’s end. You better hurry up and get your ass back to the tower,” said Raven, glaring darkly at her ceiling.
Raven listened to his soft breathing as he seemed to process her rant. She heard him take a long intake of breath. “I’m sorry,”
They plunged into silence as his words seemed to crawl under her skin and settle low in her stomach. His voice was soft as it carried through her phone. She knew Tim. His voice carried a lot of weight. “Tim,”
“I’ll be back at the Tower in two days. Batman and I finished the mission. I’m sorry I didn’t give you guys any heads up. It was strictly covert. I’ll tell you more about it once I’m back at the Tower,” Tim explained over the phone. Raven listened to his intake of breath. “Just need to recover from the gunshot wound so I can be a bit more mobile and --”
“You got shot?” Raven frowned.
“Err, yeah. GSW, left thigh. Still need to fish out the bullet. Sprained left ankle too and may or may not have a bruised rib, er, ribs?”
Raven finally heard the little slur in his voice and just the hint of strain and tiredness. Even if the world would be going up in flames and was at the brink of exploding, Tim rarely showed any signs of slowing down. Self-preservation be damned. “Are you high on painkillers?”
“May or may not have double dosed on morphine to make this call before I fish out this bullet,”
“You took morphine and wanted phone sex before treating your GSW?” Raven repeated, sounding incredulous. She heard him snort softly. “You should go to the Cave,” frowned Raven, rolling over on her bed and slowly sitting up to move out of her bed.
“Nothing I can’t handle on my own,” Tim waved her off, voice dismissive.
Raven rolled her eyes as she sat up and planted her feet firmly on her carpeted floor. “God you're stubborn,” she muttered into her phone, listening to his breathing. “Knowing you, you’re haphazardly bleeding out on your couch,”
“Bed and not bleeding out, I appreciate your confidence,”
“Shut up, I’m coming over,” she snapped. Not bothering to change into anything else, she easily opened a portal - the location of Tim’s apartment imprinted into memory. She stepped into Tim’s dark living room and her knee knocked into his coffee table, a few coffee mugs rattled noisily. She cursed softly under her breath as pain radiated from her knee up to her leg.
“Raven?”
Tim’s voice carried through his dark apartment and echoed through her phone, still on the line with her. Allowing her eyes to adjust to the darkness, Raven sighed and unconsciously steeled her nerves as she walked through the apartment. She ended their call as she walked down the dark hallways and finally stepped into the familiar threshold of his bedroom, lights barely lit and she regarded his form from where he sat on the edge of his bed surrounded by medical equipment.
“Heeey,”
Tim offered her a tired, tentative smile and she did not miss how his eyes swept over her form as she stood in his doorway. She ignored the jump of his emotions as they stared at each other, a first in over a month, and she pointedly ignored how her chest warmed at his familiar presence and interest in her.
“You look like shit,” she said, brushing aside the soft tingle of emotions that burned under her skin and walked into his room. She watched him drop the bloodied forceps next to some of the other medical equipment he had laid out on a towel. His Red Robin uniform was strewn across the floor and he sat in his underwear in front of her, bruised and looking worse for wear.
“Thank you. You look absolutely lovely in that shirt,” Tim threw her another bemused grin before adjusting the tourniquet around his leg and applying pressure to the bulletwound on his thigh.
Raven rolled her eyes and stood next to him, briefly glancing at her oversized shirt. It was Tim’s very old Gotham Academy PE uniform. It was oversized, frayed, and terribly comfortable. It stopped barely below her butt, brushing the tops of her thighs as she moved. She caught Tim’s interested stare at her thighs.
“You should be at the cave and have Alfred patch you up, you look like you can barely stay awake,” she said, annoyed to see Tim’s all too familiar stubbornness come through. She looked at his poor choice of lighting, the bedside and study lamps offering not the best light support for fishing out a bullet from his thigh. “You could have at least turned on the main lights,”
“It’s just a bullet wound, Raven. And I really don’t want the demon brat up my ass right now. My nerves’ been frayed for over a month working with the little shit, already. I’d like some peace and quiet, for once,” Tim replied, voice laced with hints of venom. Raven sobered up. Since the timestream incident a few years ago, Tim’s relationship with his family still remained somewhat strained. She knew that Bruce was trying to mend the rift between the family, especially with Tim. But she knew well that some wounds ran incredibly deep and required more time to heal. She understood Tim’s discomfort and the strain it placed on his overall being. Over the years, Tim had turned, what was the word? Broodier? Just a hint of darker since the timestream incident and his Red Robin shift. With his emotions darker and tumultuous, Raven had unconsciously drawn herself closer to him without her knowledge.
She sighed as she watched Tim return to work on his wound, the mood in the room shifting and signaling an end to that conversation. “Let me do it,” she said softly, her hands gently brushing away Tim’s as he picked up the forceps again. Making room next to him, she sat down and quietly disinfected her hands and pulled on a pair of gloves. “I’ll need to remove the bullet first before I’ll heal you,” she said. “I take it you’re doped up enough from how you've been digging through that hole in your thigh as if you're looking for gold?”
Tim winced and leaned back with a soft huff of laughter, he gave her a little more room to lean over his wounded leg. He shot her pained grin. “Enough to call you at 3 in the morning for phone sex,”
Raven rolled her eyes at the sight of his grin, watching him carefully lean back. "You're terrible,"
"You know it," Tim grinned and leaned in just a little into her space, breath fanning over her cheek.
Raven hummed and proceeded to fully ignore him as she began working on his thigh. She ignored his pained grunt as she carefully pulled out the bullet from his thigh and dropped it into the ready steel kidney tray. It clattered into the container noisily. She looked up at his pained expression and eyed him curiously as she pressed some gauze firmly into his wound to stop the bleeding. "Any other bullet wounds? Or things that need stitching?"
Under the muted lights, Tim looked worse for wear. A large bruise blossoming on his right cheek, his chest looked terribly discolored from fresh and old bruises, a few cuts looked like they needed attention too. But tending to those wounds didn't seem necessary since she'd heal him shortly, she thought. She listened as he groaned in pain and tried to sit upright. "All good, Nurse Raven. Should have come in a nurse’s uniform tho,"
Raven rolled her eyes at the teasing lilt in his voice. Pulling off her gloves, she gently placed her hands on his side and upper thigh and felt the familiar muscles contract under her cool fingertips. Inhaling softly, concentrated on his injuries and allowed her powers to flow from her core and seep through her fingertips and into Tim’s body. Depending on the injuries, healing someone always was a different experience. She felt the familiar warmth of her powers seeping into Tim’s body, a warmth she had grown long accustomed with. Her magic wrapped around his injuries, strained muscle, and wounds, dragging them out of his body, along with the last dregs of drugs and medicine, ridding Tim from all of his injuries within minutes. Tim’s abdomen contracted under her fingertips. Her skin tingled as his injuries coursed through her.
Her head throbbed painfully and for a moment, it felt like the world shifted as her magic returned to her, having completed its healing intent. She processed his injuries, seemingly trying to sanitize her own body from his injuries she dragged back into her. She inhaled softly, sharply aware of Tim’s intense stare as she tried to come to. Drawing her hands away from his skin, she inhaled softly and opened her eyes. “All done,” she announced.
Raven blinked and absently stared at Tim’s Red Robin costume on the floor as she tried to center herself, while staying keenly aware of Tim’s stare as he watched her every move. Healing Tim had always that effect on her, the familiarity of his energy seeping into her much too closely for her liking. Her nerves tingle and she shivered involuntarily. She felt his hand gently around her forearm, jolting her out of her thoughts. “You good?” Tim asked gently, aware how much of a toll it took for her to heal someone. He eyed her in concern. “You didn’t need to do that, Raven,”
Raven looked up, catching the concern in Tim’s eyes. Maneuvering her hand in his grip, she touched his forearm and felt his pulse faintly under her fingertips. Smiling softly and tilting her head, she met his concerned stare. "I know. I wanted to," she said and gave his arm a gentle squeeze.
Pulling away, she turned to stand and nudged his leg with her knee. "Go take a shower, you stink. I'll take care of this," she said while picking up the medical tools on his bed and avoiding his stare.
She watched him stand up and pause next to her, eyeing her as if he was weighing out what he wanted to say next. “You won’t join?” he asked tentatively, there was a softness in his voice but the teasing lilt covered the unsure waver in his voice. Despite everything between them, the confidence and secrecy, there was a hint of uncertainty that always peeked through.
Raven weighed her options, but ultimately decided against it, ignoring the warm tingle that ran down her back. “Tempting, but no,” she threw him an amused smile over her shoulder and wrapped all supplies in the bloodied towel. “I’m too tired,”
Tim cleared his throat and nodded. There was a fleeting emotion that flickered in his eyes as he stared at her briefly, before nodding again. “Right,” he said and quietly walked towards his bathroom.
Raven picked up all the supplies wrapped up in the towel with one hand and grabbed the kidney bowl with the bullet with her other hand. She listened as the bullet rattled noisily in the bowl as she silently padded through Tim’s apartment, heading towards the medical room on the third floor. She knew Tim’s apartment by heart, countless visits had her well acquainted with most of the rooms and their functions. None of the other Titans knew this of course. Or the Batfamily.
Entering the small medical room, Raven set to work cleaning the supplies and disposing the used gloves and gauzes into the biohazards bin. She meticulously cleaned out the supplies before setting everything into their designated sterilization chamber. Picking up the bloodied towel she quietly headed to the first floor into Tim’s laundry area and quickly ran a wash for the towel to get the blood stains out. It would be a waste to ruin a perfectly good towel that probably cost more than one of her civilian outfits. She silently threw in the towel and dialied in the right settings for the wash. As she pulled out the detergent, pine forest - tough on stains and gentle on clothes, it caught her by surprise how domesticated and normal this all was.
It struck her and her heart stuttered at the image of domesticity.
The laundry machine whirred to life and she momentarily watched the lone towel tumble in the machine. She ignored the inexplicable tightness that crossed her chest and Raven hugged herself briefly. How odd.
Leaving the laundry area, Raven contemplated what she should do next as she stood in the middle of Tim’s dark hallway. In the distance she could no longer hear the sounds of Tim’s shower, signaling he was probably done showering — or he had slipped and died in the shower while stepping out. Sighing softly, she decided that perhaps she could check on him before heading back to the tower. Oh the excuses she liked to make, she thought to herself.
She found Tim sitting on his side of the bed, in a pair of fresh Green Arrow underwear and leaning against his headboard, busy looking through his tablet. Sensing her step in, Tim looked up from whatever he was reading and offered her a tired smile. “Hey,”
Raven smiled. “Hey,” she said and eyed him curiously. “Feel better?”
Tim chuckled and carefully placed his tablet on his bedside table and regarded her with a smile. “Much better. It’s like I never got shot,” he blinked and his lips curled further into a smile. “Or broke a few ribs,”
Raven released a soft huff of laughter. She pushed herself away from the doorframe. “Seeing that you’re no longer dying, I’ll go back to the tower,” she said.
Tim looked confused. “You won’t stay?”
Raven frowned and eyed him incredulously. "It’s almost dawn. People will wonder where I am,"
Tim shrugged nonchalantly, seemingly not taking her answer. "We'll figure out an excuse. We always do," he told her and she watched that smile blossom on his lips that always seemed to disarm her. Didn’t she say that she needed to go back to the Tower?
"Stay? I know you're tired, Raven,"
She was. Healing always drained her and if she did get back to the tower she'd be more tired from traveling through her portal. She'd sleep through the morning and explaining to the rest of the team why she was so tired was not something she was up to. Sighing, her shoulders sagged in defeat and she allowed her body to be lulled into the familiarity of Tim’s warm presence.
Ah, the excuses she liked to pull give herself.
Tim looked triumphant as she walked into his room and silently slipped into the opposite side of his bed. She wordlessly sunk into his bed, keeping her gaze steady on him as she slid under his ridiculously comfortable sheets and settling into bed. Her body sank into the familiar softness of his bed, bones and muscles immediately relaxing. She watched Tim settle in next to her, their proximity enveloping her in a warmth that made her belly tingle and her body unconsciously curl closer to him.
She watched Tim turn off the lights, engulfing them in complete darkness. She listened to his breathing, soft and steady, next to her. His warmth and smell wrapped around her, lulling her softly to sleep. She listened as Tim inhaled softly, she could see his chest rise in the shadows of his bedroom and she watched entranced, her own senses tingling in anticipation and sleep.
Raven knew Tim was watching her as his heartbeat and breathing remained steady. She listened as Tim turned to his side, drawing himself just a little bit closer to her. His warmth seeped into her and she unconsciously leaned in, chasing his familiar warmth and presence.
"Come here," he whispered, breath tickling her nose. A large, calloused hand wrapped around her forearm and very gently pulled her towards him. She allowed him to drape her over his chest and she automatically sunk into him, pressing herself into his body and draping her arm across his chest.
She felt Tim shift against her, gently arrange them more comfortably, his large hand sliding down her back and resting comfortably against her. Her cheek pressed into Tim’s chest, and she silently listened to his muted heartbeat and allowed the steady rise and fall of his chest to calm her tingling nerves.
Legs slid into each other, tangling together, into a mess of limbs a motion practiced and familiar. As stillness settled around them, Raven felt the rest of the world melt away from them. She knew Tim was still awake, fingers lightly pressing into her skin and his unsettled thoughts boring under her skin.
Despite the quiet, Raven lay awake listening to the unheard noise that settled around them. Her emotions took a leap and her throat tighten, the distant thoughts of the Tower and the world outside of their little space gnawing at her.
She felt Tim shift under her, still awake and fingers tracing unknown patterns into her hip. Tim’s presence was warm and familiar — his emotions, thoughts, and aura she had since memorized over time, seemingly burned under her skin.
Pressed into him, breath fanning over her cheek, this silence moment felt terribly intimate. In the darkness, she could see the outline of Tim’s face inclined towards her. She could feel his gaze on her, thoughts running through his mind at a pace usual to Tim fashion. It surprised her (scared her) how well she knew this.
It felt intimate, it was intimate, being here practically enveloped in everything that was Tim. An inexplicable tightness fanned across her chest and her breath caught her throat as the stillness of the moment wrapped around them. Stray thoughts haunted her, gnawing at her stomach and tightening at her chest. She wondered if she should have just gone home. The world outside seemed to mock her.
“Go to sleep,” Tim whispered and he suddenly shifted them, his body curling around her and tucking her into his side. Arms wrapped around her tightly, and Raven felt like she was swallowed whole by his familiar warmth.
She released the breath she was holding, emotions practically buzzing under her skin. Closing her eyes, Raven willed herself not to overthink and allowed Tim’s breathing to lull her to sleep. She pointedly ignored the mess of emotions that mockingly gnawed at her skin.
“Sleep,” whispered Tim, fingers pressing into her hip and legs wrapping around hers just a little tighter.
“Good night,” Raven mumbled, her face pressed into his chest and she allowed sleep to slowly drag her into darkness. The world slipped away, momentarily.
She woke up hours later, her bones less tired and heavy, alone in bed. The sun was shining through the gaps of Tim’s curtains, a mocking reminder that she had slept through the hour she had promised herself she’d return to the tower. Laying on her side, Raven blinked away the last dredges of sleep and blankly stared at the empty space next to her. Funny, she barely noticed Tim slipping out of bed. Then again, when they shared a bed she always found herself sleeping more soundly.
Sighing softly, she quietly sat up and reached for her phone on the nightstand next to her, quickly sending a text message to Cassie that she’d be gone for the rest of the day — ‘Personal errands in the city. Went out early.’
No use trying to sneak back to the tower when she already missed most of the morning.
Silently walking out of Tim’s bedroom, she heard him move around in his kitchen. She could smell fresh coffee wafting through the air and she silently wondered how long he had been up.
She stepped into his kitchen and watched a shirtless Tim hunched over his laptop by the kitchen island, deeply engrossed with whatever he was working on. Raven always found Tim’s kitchen ridiculously large for someone who barely was at home (or cooked), with a sprawling kitchen island and modern black granite aesthetic. But then again, if you’re a billionaire, you could do anything with your money. Case in point, ridiculously large modern kitchen.
“Hey,” Tim finally took notice of her, looking over his shoulder and blue eyes brightening slightly at the sight of her standing in the kitchen entrance. “You’re awake,”
Raven hummed, ignoring the little jump in her chest and she tilted her head in amusement. “You’re awake too,”
The corner of Tim’s lips curled up at the lilt in her voice. “Woke up a little while ago, I figured I didn’t want to wake you while I worked,”
Raven blinked and eyed his laptop briefly before turning back to him. “Work?”
Tim shrugged and closed his laptop. “Budget season, just wanted to review a few plans in time for Monday,”
Raven hummed, throwing him an amused look before walking into the kitchen. “How exciting,” she drawled. She walked over the kitchen counter and grabbed one of the spare mugs and started prepping her tea. Thankfully Tim had decided to stock up on some of her tea blends over the course of her visits.
The familiar scent of chamomile and lavender filled the air and Raven turned around to casually lean against the kitchen counter, clutching her steaming mug, and catching Tim staring at her bemusedly.
“What?” she asked, tilting her head curiously and catching his interest in her. Tim had long stopped working and his excel sheets were abandoned.
“Nothing,” Tim chuckled and shook his head, long hair flying into his eyes. Raven thought his long hair suited him. “It’s been a while,” he said, tilting his head thoughtfully to the side and studying her.
Raven rolled her eyes, ignoring the curious tickle of emotions and took a tentative sip from her tea. She watched him studying her and she ignored his interested gaze as he swept his eyes over her form. “That happens when you just go and disappear on us," she said.
Tim winced and at the very least looked slightly apologetic. "I'm sorry. I won't hear the end of this, won't I?"
Raven shrugged, she honestly couldn't care any less. "Probably from Connor or Rose a whole lot, yeah. Heads up,"
Tim sighed and ran a hand through his hair, Raven watched the movement absently. "Sorry," he breathed. Offering an amused smile, he continued. "I guess I owe everyone. Forgive me?"
Raven rolled her eyes at Tim's apologetic stare. Carefully placing her steaming mug on the counter next to her, she leveled him with an unamused stare. "It has been a shitshow since you left, not gonna lie. But we managed. Everyone's just a little dramatic. But you definitely owe a few people on the team," she said.
Tim threw her a small smile. "Anyway I can make it up to you?"
Raven fought the urge to roll her eyes again at that familiar lilt in his voice and the way his lips tugged into a smile. "You can start by making breakfast, I'm hungry."
Tim laughed and straightened on his stool. He picked up his phone that lay on the counter next to him and held it out to her. "Or we could order in from Royal Thai?"
She released a soft amused huff. Tim and his obsession over Thai food. Pushing herself away from the counter she was leaning against, she walked over him and took his phone out his hand with an amused roll of her eyes. "I feel like Pad Thai is more lunch than breakfast." She said while opening UberEats.
Tim laughed and hopped off his stool. Stepping closer to Raven he watched her type in their usual order of Pad thai, fried basil and pork, and pineapple fried rice into the app. "Okay, you're right. We could order in for lunch and we can add the sticky rice you like. How about I make, uh, pancakes? Eggs? French toast? Waffles." Tim blinked and watched her. "What do you like?"
She ignored how her chest fluttered at how he remembered her favorite sticky rice. It was ridiculous how she could get worked up over sticky rice. Absently adding that to their order, she scheduled their meal for a late lunch delivery. Granting Tim would get around making her waffles. 1 pm should be about right. She’d head back to the tower right after. Looking up, she shrugged. "What do you want?"
Raven caught how the corner of his lips curled into that familiar teasing smile and Tim stepped closer, taking his phone out of her hands and carefully stepping into her personal space. "Well, there is something I'm hungry for,"
His voice was teasingly low and Raven immediately felt that all too familiar rush of warm press of emotions run over her skin and seep into her. Forgetting her better judgement, she leaned into his space, catching his hot breath fan over her cheek as her lips curled into smirk. “Oh?” she breathed. “Like?”
Fingers danced over her hip and slid tightly around her waist, digging possessively into her skin and pulling her closer to Tim. She inhaled sharply as her hips bumped into his and her senses hummed at the familiar feel of solid muscle against her. She looked up, eyes dancing teasingly as Tim’s dark gaze studied her face. She stood in anticipation and watched as Tim hovered over her, all but consuming her personal space and pulling her flush against him, fingers digging into her skin. She felt herself drawn automatically to him.
“I have a few things in mind,” he whispered, leaning in and barely brushing his lips against her cheek.
Raven hummed and raised her eyebrow playfully. Somewhere in the back of her mind, far, far in the back of her head , a little voice told her this was a terrible idea. But it’s been over a month since they last talked, and as Tim pressed a warm kiss against her neck and pressed her against the kitchen island, reasoning seemed to fly out the window and she allowed herself to get wrapped up in his presence — again.
Fingers slipped under her shirt easily, rough hands sliding up her waist and drawing up the old shirt painfully slowly. Teeth scrapped against her pulse point and Tim’s leg slipped in between hers, pressing into her. Raven drew in a sharp breath as her pulse stuttered under his subtle ministration. Tim knew how to play her like a finely tuned instrument.
Raven exhaled, not noticing the breath she had been holding. Catching his heady stare, her lips curled into a smile in challenge, catching how he easily goaded her to playing. “Do tell,” she mumbled, draping her arms over his shoulders allowing him better access to the curve of her neck. Heat began to pool low in the pit of her abdomen.
“Well,” Tim breathed against her neck after lavishing her with small kisses. He pulled away, offering just a hint of space between them to look at her with mischievous blue eyes that were dark with a familiar hunger that had her heart stuttering and her stomach knot eagerly. Hands slid down her sides again, resting on the swell of her hip and fingers teasingly hooking into the waistband of her panties.
“There’s you completely naked on my kitchen counter,” he said in a low voice while his fingers slipped into her panties, dragging against the side of her hips and sliding over the swell of her ass. She gasped as Tim cupped her ass and pulled her closer, rolling his hips into hers and Raven was sure her nerves were just about to explode. She whimpered as their hips pressed into each other, in an all too familiar hungry warmth.
Tim smirked down at her, watching her cheeks flush in satisfaction. “I’d think that’s an absolute breakfast feast,” He pressed into her further and Raven involuntarily bucked into him at the feel of his telltale erection pressing into her. She whimpered. Tim pressed a kiss to her cheek, warm breath fanning over her ear that made her slowly delirious. “Don’t you think?”
Her resolve broke and she released a soft moan as fingers pressed into her heated skin, drawing her closer. “Yes, please,”
Tim kissed her, a first in a very long time, and Raven all but melted into him, forgetting her distracting thoughts — that was something future Raven could worry about. But now, now she wanted this — all of this. She all but pressed into him, hungrily kissing him back and chasing after that all too familiar high only Tim could draw out from her.
With a ragged breath, Tim pulled away and hoisted her up onto her kitchen counter. Stepping in between her legs, Tim dragged his hands up the tops of her thighs and made quick work to remove her shirt. She watched him drink in her naked sight, blue eyes growing darker as they swept over her nakedness. Her emotions purred in delight.
"Where did you get this?" He asked as his hands stopped their curious exploration over her body. His left hand stopped over the dip of her waist, hand just stopping over a freshly healed bullet wound. His thumb feather over the discolored puckered flesh.
"Got shot with a silver bullet two weeks ago," Raven absently shrugged. She watched him stare at the wound intently, eyebrows drawn into disapproval. "I guess silver bullets don't just work for vampires,"
Tim hummed and Raven watched him gently slide his fingers over the new wound. There was a swirl of emotions from him before he leaned into her and pressed a kiss to the bullet wound.
Raven inhaled sharply at the intimate press of his lips. Her heart leapt and she stared in surprise at Tim as he pulled away and smiled at her. "There, all better."
Her heart swelled without her consent as she watched the smile blossom on Tim's face. He rested his chin on her stomach, blue eyes bright and teasing. Raven released a soft huff of laughter and ran her hand through his long hair. "You sap,"
Tim chuckled and pressed a kiss to her abdomen, staring up at her teasingly. Dragging his hands tantalizingly slow up her rib cage and slowly sliding them her body, fingertips pressing into heated skin and scraping down the sides of her legs that framed his torso. Tim squeezed her thighs and straightened, drinking in her half-naked form sprawled over his countertop. Raven inhaled deeply, relishing the musky emotions that draped heavily over them. Heat pooled low in anticipation as Tim once again studied her, memorizing her dip and cure of her body with nimble fingers and gentle kisses.
"Time to feast," Tim mumbled into her skin, sparking a fire within her that had her draw in a sharp breath.
Leaning over her, Tim pressed a kiss into her ribcage and gently slid his left hand up her side. He teased her panties a bit and Raven gently rocked into him in anticipation. She whimpered as his hand cupped her breast and began playing with her nipple, drawing into it into a taut peak. Tim gently pressed kisses into her side, lowering with every kiss and teasingly looking up at her as he drew gasps from his gentle ministrations.
He pressed a kiss into her right hip bone just above her panties and she watched him smirk in satisfaction as she gasped and squirmed underneath him. A fire of anticipation was building low and she was desperate for release. Tim kissed an old scar, lips lingering just above her panties.
"Tim," she whispered, her voice hitching and her eyes catching his teasing glint, thoroughly enjoying watching her come undone.
Over the time they spent together, only Tim could unravel her slowly. He knew every way to unravel layer after layer of her, to draw out the rarest of emotions. She whimpered as Tim dipped lower, kissing just above her waistband of her panties and his fingers dug into her hips, keeping her from rocking into his face. Her chest tightened, it was only Tim who could so easily squeeze himself into her tightly wrapped up space and draw her out.
A finger dragged across her wet panties, pressing teasingly into her throbbing core. Raven gasped and arched off the counter. His finger stroked her and she whimpered, as the fire Tim stoked slowly came to life and started to burn her skin. "Tim," she whimpered, legs pressing into his sides to lock him in place.
"So wet," Tim mumbled, looking thoroughly pleased at what he found. His finger stroked her a few more times before deciding she had enough and he made quick work to remove her panties.
Fully naked on his cold kitchen counter, Raven inhaled deeply as Tim spread her legs wide for him to stand in between. Raising her head off the counter, she watched his eyes darken and practically drink in her nakedness draped on his counter.
"You're dripping, Raven," Tim praised, voice close to a growl. He stared at her, drinking her in like a parched man in the desert. Raven felt her skin burn under his heated gaze.
And without much preamble, Tim dipped his head down and finally drank.
Raven gasped loudly, arching off the cold kitchen counter and her thighs strained against Tim's arms as they pressed her wide open. A groan rippled through her chest loudly as Tim’s tongue furiously flickered over her clit, shooting sparks of electricity up her spine. Without worrying over teammates overhearing and discovering them, Raven groaned loudly as her whole body burned under Tim’s thorough attention.
Melting into their smoldering desires that lay thick and heavy in the room, Raven meweled and jerked her hips into Tim’s face as he dragged his tongue over her. She saw the satisfied glint in his eyes as she caught him watching her while he continued with his furious attack on her pussy. The dark glint in his eyes and his possessive emotions wrapped hotly around her and Raven whimpered as pressure slowly started to build up.
His tongue probed into her as she felt him spread her wider with fingers opening her folds. She struggled to chase for release as Tim held her writhing hips down and started sucking her clit, drawing out a guttural groan from her. Sliding her hands over her head, Raven grasped the edge of the counter above her and held on as she slowly started to spiral into oblivion.
"Tim, Tim, Tim," she whimpered his name like a prayer, hips writhing into his face as he continued to furiously flick his tongue over her clit. He probed into her with his tongue, drinking greedily. She felt him hum into her, seemingly utterly pleased at her reaction.
She gasped as he roughly pulled her closer to the edge of the counter and buried his face into her, lapping and flicking his tongue over her pussy, drinking her like a thirsty man. Pressure pooled low in her abdomen and a fire threatened to just consume her. Drawing herself up breathlessly by her elbows, Raven watched greedily as Tim all but consumed her.
"Please," Raven whimpered, desperately rolling her hips into his face as his tongue fucked her senseless. She was ready to implode. Throwing her head back, she gasped as fingers slipped into her and his tongue furiously attacked her clit. "Fuck, Tim."
She heard him growl into her and his lust and desire burned her skin, singeing her soul and seeping into her very core. She mewled as she came fucking hard around his mouth and fingers and she breathlessly watched him lap her up, drinking her in and furiously pounding his fingers into her, drawing every last drop from her.
She rode his face through the high, desperating drawing it out, gasping and whining as the release all but burned her senses. Raven was sure she was loud and wanton, and she had an aching feeling that they looked like a scene straight out of a porn movie. They looked vastly different from their usual calm and collected selves, like two different personas of what the world knew them to be.
The thought of how they bared their rawness, their scars and their little little secrets to each other — and only to each other — caught her off guard. She gasped through her orgasm, a little delirious from Tim’s heated emotions. She caught his dark gaze, blue eyes filled with lust and desire and so much more. Her legs wrapped around his head and his tongue remained unforgiving on her clit, dragging out every bit of her orgasm. Her chest tightened and her stomach churned at the possessiveness and how, despite her better judgement, she wanted this — all of this. Raven whined and felt his fingers sink into her thighs just as she ground herself into his mouth, moaning loudly.
Fingers wrapped around her wrist and Raven drew in a ragged breath and watched mesmerized and drunk high as Tim slipped his hand into hers and their fingers intertwined. Mouth unrelentingly sucking and teasing her, and his fingers squeezed hers tenderly — a stark contrast of their dirty ravishing. It was tender and warm. And it had Raven’s heart stutter.
How dangerous this was, she thought through the fog of lust.
Tim released her, finally, mouth glistening and looking all too pleased. Her legs felt like jelly and Raven wasn’t sure if she could even keep herself upright. Her body practically hummed with electricity and fire. She watched him grin at her triumphantly, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand before pressing a kiss to her neck and to the underside of her chin. “Delicious,” his voice rumbled into her skin and Raven marveled at the stark contrast of this Tim to the Tim everyone else knew. Darker, rougher, possessive, and gentler all the same. She was absolutely pleased to have this Tim for herself — for the time being.
Raven hummed, her skin buzzing as she relaxed into his looming form and slowly went limp against him. Her arms warped around his shoulders, fingers absently dancing over scars and muscle as Tim continued to press kisses against her shoulder and neck. She felt his emotions, smoldering under his skin from their little tryst, and she knew that they were far from done.
He kissed her, it was sloppy and needy, stealing her breath away and greedily drinking in her whimper. Still high from her orgasm and hungrily feeding off his own lust, Raven returned the kiss in kind, fingers curling into the hard muscle of his shoulders, drawing him closer to her. She tasted herself on him.
“Can you stand?” Tim asked her, thumb swiping over her nipple and drawing a soft gasp from her. She nodded, albeit she wasn’t all too sure — her body felt like it was on fire and weak all at once. Mumbling into her skin, Tim kissed the underside of her chin before pulling her down from the counter and onto her wobbly feet.
They kissed and kissed, greedy hands slipping over skin and scars and Raven felt her skin ache again as Tim all but consumed her — her back pressing into the ledge of his kitchen counter, drawing out gasp after gasp, and rekindling a fire into an inferno.
Warmth seeped into her skin and Raven greedily took what Tim had to offer, allowing her own hands to take from the planes of his skin and milk every gasp and groan from his lips. She knew that this was a terribly dangerous field they were constantly threading in — and she knew that he knew that too. But, perhaps she was selfish, all she wanted was to take. And she knew Tim wanted the same — take every last bit she had to offer.
She groaned and her chest tightened as her thoughts disappeared as quickly as they came and she allowed herself to get consumed in lust and desire. Tim turned her around and she braced herself over the counter as Tim loomed over her bent over form, kissing her back and roughly grabbing her ass.
“Please,” she whispered into her arms, anticipation building as hands slipped over her back and ass, teasing her. “Tim,”
What dangerous little games they play, she thought over the sounds of their ragged breath and the delicious feel of warm, solid skin pressed against her. She felt her heart stutter and her chest tighten from being wrapped up so comfortably in emotions and feelings that were both his and hers.
Oh how dangerous.
She groaned as Tim sunk into her from behind, filling her and making her slip into bright, hot extacy that only he could bring. His warmth, the fullness, that he brought was uniquely Tim’s. Terribly addicting. Raven groaned, arching into Tim’s chest as he picked up the rhythm and absolutely debauched her from behind.
She forgot all about the world around her. And Raven allowed an all too familiar heat to all but consume her. Again.
