jurassic park but it's tiny elephants and nothing goes wrong 🥺
same score but played entirely on kazoos
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@flyingleaps
jurassic park but it's tiny elephants and nothing goes wrong 🥺
same score but played entirely on kazoos
rear window is so funny imagine if grace kelly was your girlfriend and she was practically begging you to have sex with her but you were just like no. i have to spy on this old man with my binoculars. i think he killed his wife.
the fact that I have to be in the “right headspace” to do even the simplest tasks. absolutely humiliating
Collar
1630-1650
England
Victoria & Albert (Accession Number: T.21-1922)
“I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, ‘if this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is’”
— Kurt Vonnegut (via bwcspod-blog)
I asked my kids if they’d prefer a secret garden or a secret library and my son shook his head and was like “I don’t trust the secret gardeners and librarians”
Me: what if there aren’t any gardeners or librarians.
Son: there’s always a librarian. Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there. And it’s a garden, there has to be someone taking care of it or it isn’t really a garden.
Me:
Me: this was supposed to be lighthearted
Daughter: don’t trust the secret librarian.
Son: any librarian who hoards a library to themselves is hiding something.
Daughter: /nods seriously/
Me: why are you two talking as if from experience should I be concerned
The kids are right Jazz
But what if I want to be the secret librarian?
Me: what if you were the secret librarian?
Son: wouldn’t be a secret library. I have nothing to hide.
Daughter: so not a secret librarian. A good librarian.
Me: you two are on a wavelength I can’t understand
What a way to find out your kids went on a whole-ass portal fantasy adventure at some point.
Background art for Disney’s Winnie the Pooh
deleted script from City on the Edge of Forever (1967).
So recently, I’ve been noticing a lot more people starting to call Disney out on their bullshit, which is really awesome because Goddamn have they just gotten worse and worse as time goes on, but there’s one things I’ve started to notice about these posts that I think warrants a really important addition that needs to be made to all future callouts.
You see in a lot of these cases the consensus is “Fuck Disney” and while that’s very true, in reality your kinda being extremely broad here, as the company is broken up into at least 8 different studios, split into different divisions like ones for the theme parks and resorts, one for the cruise line etc, and has hundreds of thousands of employees under its belt. A lot of times when companies like Amazon and Tesla are called out, people are also making sure to specifically calling out their CEOs and founders, in this case Bezos and Musk, and making it very clear that they are also very much so in the wrong here, rightfully so placing the responsibility onto them.
But I rarely ever see this happen with Disney, and I thinks it’s important we start to change that a bit. Right now Disney as a whole is being helmed by two men, Bob Iger and Bob Chapek, as even though Chapek has officially been named the CEO and Iger was on his way out, he decided to step back into the role for a bit due to the pandemic, so he’s still very much at fault for a lot of this as well. You might know Iger as the man responsible for buying up, well, pretty much every hot ticket property Disney has right now including Pixar, Star Wars, and Marvel and as well as plenty of other shady deals. He’s even made it clear that’s he looking to take up a Presidential bid sometime in the next few years which is just Absolutely Yikes. Chapek on the other hand, is so notorious that even die-hard Disney fans more often then not will say they despise him, mainly due to his massive budget cuts in the theme parks that have not only dulled down the overall experience, but more importantly have resulted in thousands of cast members, even before the pandemic, being laid off because he didn’t see them as being “necessary”. His most common nickname is Lex Luther for a reason. And what’s worst, while they both agreed to cutting off their salaries completely at the start of the pandemic, they’ve since gone back to being paid-in full, and they’re still laying off massive amounts of their workers while their parks are being reopened, which I can tell you from personal experience is exactly what Chapek wanted all along.
There’s plenty more about these two guys that I could talk about, but the point here is it’s time to put faces and names to a lot of the shit the company has being trying to get away with over the years, and I wanna keep this post relatively short. So, just please remember, make sure whenever you say “Fuck Disney” that you also make sure to say “Fuck Bob Iger” and “Fuck Bob Chapek”. Make their names just as known as Bezos and Musk for all the wrong reasons, and maybe we can stop another fucking millionaire from having one of the highest seats in the US government.
Leonard Nimoy: Bill is the only actor with whom I have that spark, that chemistry—to anything like the extent I have it with him… When we step into a scene, I always know—something’s going to happen. Just amazing. Just amazing the tremendous spark of some kind that he would set off. You remember, Bill, what used to happen in the makeup department in the morning. You’d come in. We’d have these screaming, yelling, laughing discussions. Walk out of there exhausted, exhausted— William Shatner: (Laughing.) The day’s over. Right. Leonard Nimoy: Exhausted, just totally depleted. You know—how can I do a day’s work? I’m aching from laughing. Just amazing. Just amazing the kind of spark that he would set off. And I think, as I really think about it, the idea of working together again on STAR TREK—it’s that thing that I would look forward to most. That happening again. I have no doubt in my mind that it would. Amazing spark that I get from him…
From Shatner: Where No Man… (1979)
You cracked the codes and guessed all the From The Vault titles. 👏👏👏
Here’s the full track list, my friends. I’m really honored that Keith Urban is a part of this project, duetting on That’s When and singing harmonies on We Were Happy. I was his opening act during the Fearless album era and his music has inspired me endlessly. I’m counting down the minutes til we can all jump into this brave world together, filled with equal parts nostalgia and brand newness.
Head first, Fearless 💛
The Last Night of the Winter
Y/N: When have I ever done anything rash or irresponsible?
Shigaraki: I keep a list
Y/N: I suppose it's alphabetized, right?
Shigaraki: It's in chronological order, you heathen
My favorite kind of Adultier Adults™ are those who actively try, like really really try, to understand millennial and GenZ humor but just can’t q u i t e get it, and turn it into something 10x funnier
Me over the phone in bad traffic: Oh, I can move again, the road work is done
My grandpa: Uh I sure hope it isn’t
Me:
Gramps:
Me: Did-
Gramps: Did I do it right
Me with my grandpa again: What’cha doing?
Gramps: making a video of seven seconds of joy
Me, frightened: gramps?
Gramps: *Sends a 7-second video of himself eating Almond Joy* Can you put it on vine for me
Me, choking up, not willing to tell him it’s gone: S-Sure
Me, to my Grandmother over the phone: I don’t know gramma, I don’t know if English is a degree that suits me.
Gramma: But you’ve always loved writing!
Gramps, screaming for the other side of their apartment, just audible over the phone: THAT’S HER OPINIIIOOOOOONNNNNNN!
(Over the phone at like 22:30) Me: Man I am just exhausted but can’t find any sleeping aids, are there any left from when you-
Gramps: It’s the sleeping time
Me: yeah?
Gramps: So it’s the time to sleep?
Me: …. yes?
Gramps: Might I suggest you put head on pillow and sleep?
Me, finally realizing: You watch tiktoks. YOU watch TIKTOK.
Gramps: Just get some warm milk, you cretin
Gramps: *Hangs up*
Me, staring at my phone in disbelief: WH Y
Me, over Skype: Hey gramps did you get the birthday box I sent you? You wanna know what’s in it?
Gramps: DIS BOX EMPTY! WHEAT!
Gramps: *Softly tosses the box onto the couch*
Me: Wh. Wheat.
Gramps over the phone: guess what?!
Me: what?!
Gramps: my Hispanic neighbor taught me how to use freshvakdos!
Me: use… What
Gramps: you know! Freshvakdos! Guacamole!
Me: do. Do you mean fre sh avo ca do?
Gramps: YEAH
Gramps: So I heard about blessing that are actually curses so I’m going to give you one okay
Me: oh no
Gramps: oh yeah.
Me: please-
Gramps: may you receive every book you have ever wanted to read in your life
Me: ….how is this a curse
Gramps: … Only for the last chapters to be torn out and unavailable online
Me: GRAMPS NO
GRamps: GRAMPS YES
Me: *flinches as Gramps uses my deadname several times* *let’s it slip that I wear a binder* *accidentally mentions dysphoria*
Gramps: *deadname* are you okay
Me: Gramps, could you maybe call me Kai instead…?
Gramps without missing a beat or bothering to take his phone away from his face, SCREAMING to my grandma: HONEY WE’VE GOT ANOTHER GRANDTHEM!!!
Me, expecting backlash since my grandparents are conservative Mormons: *violent sobbing laughter*
Okay, since this blew up beyond expectations, here’s a list about things my grandfather has done to make me love him more than basically anyone else.
-he’s letting me live in his house while he is on a mission for his church. A gigantic house on lots of land with the large garden and a sunroom. He let me bring all of my animals as well.
-He sold me his car and truck super cheap. The truck is named Gorp. It stands for Grandpas Old Retired Pimpmobile.
-He sends me a box full of fuzzy socks every month because he knows my cat destroys them
-He started using they/them for.my pronouns and hasn’t fumbled once over phone or Skype
-He calls Gramma Lovely, Dearest, Sweetheart, and my personal favorite: Honey Buns (which I picked up ages ago and now my favorite person ever is labeled honey buns in my phone)
-He still says Wheat instead of Yeet. Intentionally.
-He speaks fluent Spanish and learned immigration laws to help keep his Hispanic neighbors safe when “ICE comes around with it’s ugly unchristian head”
- he may be a Mormon, but in his (and Grammas) eyes, Christianity is about love, forgiveness, acceptance, and being there for those you love and care for and he LIVES by that.
-when they aren’t on a mission for the LDS church, they are foster parents to strictly only older teenagers and troubled kids.
-He loves everyone and will accept anyone into his family as long as they are kind and patient.
-He learned ASL so he could communicate with his dead neighbor and be a friend to him
And finally, the man, the myth, the legend himself:
This is Gramps and Gramma (who asked for her face to be covered). I also covered up the badge Gramps wears because it gives his location and name.
I would like you all to know that Gramps and Gramma have offered to adopt every single one of y'all as Grandbabies! They will learn about any religion and support ya no matter what. All they ask is for you to fold your socks. NO ONE IS GRAMMA AND GRAMPS-LESS THIS HOLIDAY SEASON
(also if any of y'all are lonely I am so so happy to message anyone and make friends. I love you all 💜)
excuse me, but I would die for Gramps
Gramps would never allow you to die of anything but OVEREATING AND DINNER IS AT 1800 DONT BE LATE
I really think it’s funny that you put dead instead of deaf but I also feel like he would totally do it if his dead neighbor spoke asl so
Was it a mistake or is there a ghost I didn’t clue y'all into *sips tea*
this is the best thing i’ve seen all day
this is so wholesome
you’re allowed to settle for a calm life, despite people on social media making it seem like you should do all these adventurous things. you don’t have to travel far and wide in order to be happy. you don’t have to have an amazing career in order to be proud of who you are and your life. live your life the way you want to, calm lives are good. a calm life is what i’m aiming for.
The same goes for your job, too. You don’t have to have enormous goals, you don’t have to be dedicated to a career. And for relationships! You don’t have to get married to be valid, or even be in a relationship, or have sex. Your job is to live your life, and to make that life as satisfying to you as you can.
Ok here’s the context for the picture. I posted a tik tok of me riding my horse to a tinder date and a bunch of thirsty straight women assumed I was a hunky cowboy and slid into my dms. So I fixed it.
When I complain about being a ‘gifted’ kid who grew into a talentless adult I don’t mean that I’m not trying to work on my talents or anything
I mean that the ‘gifts’ I had are useless
Reading books above my age isn’t a talent when I’m not eleven
Knowing big words isn’t a talent when I’m not a kid, it’s just growing up
It’s just a weird thing that happens and it feels shitty when you’re brought up being told you’re an exceptional child only to realise as an adult you’re just average
This
I did a lot of reading about gifted kids and especially gifted adults when I got my “diagnosis” because I was told I was gifted at 23 and well, it serves no purpose to have a confirmation that you’re gifted at 23
Thing is, gifted children are not amazingly better than everyone else. Gifted brains just don’t work the same so they build their skills in a different order
Basically when you’re very young, most people brain learn social skills and how to interact with their peers, but gifted brains are already at the next step which is how to understand and interact with the world
That makes the stereotypical young children that are very good at math, always asking questions about how things work, very upset when they don’t know a thing
But the thing is, when everyone gets older, they’ve mastered most social skills and now turn towards understanding the world
But the gifted children have already mastered that part and are turning towards how to build social skills. Except there’s no one left to teach us about that! Because we’re late to that party
Long story short, at the end everyone, gifted or not, goes through all the necessary steps to make functioning adults, so the difference that was obvious as a child has disappeared
But us gifted people often end up with social anxiety and impostor syndrome because we are actually less equipped than others to face a world that taught everyone to be confident and talk to people while we were busy reading books above our age
……………that last paragraph.
damn.
Is ‘gifted’ really another way of being neurodivergent? (I say this as somebody who was 2X, which is not a fun way to go through the school system).
Honestly? Given its high comorbidity with ADHD and autism, I’d say yes.