an ode, to alyssia 💕
so finally after a good two years or so, its finally come to this point where i’ve decided to drop alyssia completely. it definitely wasn’t an easy situation to come to this particular decision, mostly because i have a terrible habit of clinging onto muses that i love and adore so, so much--and alyssia in particular was my first muse that i used to foray into krp, apart from having her be something significantly close in importance to my own heart. out of all my muses, i think aly is the closest to me (unintentionally), and yet still one of the lesser developed muses that i’ve had for the past two years, in part owing to a lot of her background story and the difficulty of aly as a muse herself being able to accept happiness--as something that she can’t be scared of or feel guilty about.
aly’s met really fantastic people that have built her up from the one dimensional being she was originally into this flavourful, colourful person that she is two years in, so i would really like to thank those muns that have stuck through with her and made her life a tad more beautiful, even if she hid things from them and stuck a smile on her face to make the world a little prettier.
i do maintain that she’s one of my most tortured muses, partly because of the angst, and mostly because the road to her healing was and still is incredibly long. but i have watched her improve from that guilt ridden girl who spent most of her nights having a couple of flings here and there to coming to realise that she hated the feeling of it, to finally that childish version of herself that represented a lot of her missing childhood. she found love, even though they didn’t manage to follow through far because of a lot of each other’s issues and that indepth insecurity that both she and miyeon had, found friendship--that lasted through long nights of moon watching and her being strangely pervy or greedy about food with her best friend hyeju, had deep moments of respite with minah and jiah both, and finally coming to a stop at where she realised through her latest hiatus that living as she was wasn’t living, and finally opening up to charlie about her past.
she’s done a lot. and progressed a lot. even if it feels still as though she’s been stuck in the same spot due to her own personal choices.
thank you to everyone who stuck by her and made her life just a little happier, and to all those important connections, please treat it as if aly has finally flown off to a better place. perhaps she went to chase after her lost lover somewhere in the world. perhaps she finally received the precious news that her father died, and finally felt the release that she needed to stop chaining herself to her past and to her company, taking off somewhere with only the clothes on her back and the shoes on her feet.
in my mind, alyssia would probably have given a hug to every of the bee members, including minah, sent a selfie of herself eating to hyeju, and then disappeared, somewhere in the world. perhaps one or two months later her friends and bee members would find postcards addressed to them, written in her handwriting, and at the back, attached selfies of herself, cheeks flushed, eyes creased, and a familiar cheeky little smile tipping up the corners of her lips. perhaps if she’s even luckier, she might find miyeon once more, and each selfie would have both of them in it, smiling like fools and with aly finally experiencing the childhood she’d long missed. snowfights, christmas trees, trick or treat, and most of all affection and security of a singular person that fulfills her desire to be loved the most.
thank you all for these two years or so of a wonderful journey with aly! and she’ll live, forever in our hearts 💕 think of this is as letter from both me as her mun to everyone in famed and a handwritten one from aly, before i officially send in my regards to the main about dropping alyssia. so i do hope that everyone will manage to come across this and know that their plotting and threading with her was all, deeply appreciated!
