明星

i do not speak the truth, i speak my truth | lead rapper of origin  | xing yi | associated with famed

[fmdmingxing]

Man, are we even surprised

[fmdmingxing]

“ you’re not my son ! “

“It’s childish, you’re childish. I always expected so much from you, you were always so great, my baby, my perfect little baby, you were my son, you would grow up to be something perfect, I was always so sure you would grow up to be perfect, you were so pretty, you never knew that all the moms complimented you, told me I had the most handsome son. And you always had the best grades, they were better than best, you were my smart handsome little boy. But then you moved to Korea with your dad, and he ruined you, or perhaps you ruined yourself, perhaps it was his stupid wife, or perhaps all the three of you ruined you. What I'm trying to say is, look at you! Look at what you've become, maybe you're a succesful singer, but besides that then what are you? You can't even put out a fire, you can't have a relationship for more than a couple of months, you're stupid, you're far from perfect, who are you? You're not my son, I don't want you to be my son".

The words roam in his head, over and over again, he always calls his mom so happily, tells her about his day or week, but today she had went off, told him words he had never expected, and he didn't know how to react, so he just sat down, sat down.

[fmdmingxing]

hi! sorry for not having been much around, i’ll get to dms and replies soon !

[fmdmingxing]

a synonym for fire is 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡

[fmdmingxing]

fmdyuanjun

“we’re not dying gege.” he stated simply, shrugging his shoulders as he stated the fact. “if we die because of this-” a small interruption in his sentence to cough, his lungs always having been far too sensitive. “we really are the world’s biggest idiots.” and maybe they were, yuanjun wouldn’t be surprised if he was and with how useless the older was rendering himself in this situation… they might actually be done for. which caused another laugh to escape yuanjun, the sounds slightly strained with the remnants of smoke clouding his airways. “and if we do, we probably deserve it, natural selection and all that.” he shrugged calmly.

yuanjun was launched into another burst of laughter, doubling over the table and ending in a fit of coughs as yi came up with the absolutely ridiculous plan as if it was the most logical option at hand. “no of course i don’t mean throw yourself over the fire, silly gege-” another cough rips from his throat, this one more violent and mentally, yuanjun curses his damned asthma. time to put and end to his amusement then. “i’ll do it huh, how about that? my cowardly gege.” he tutted softly, walking up to the stove, turning it off first and foremost and putting the lid on top of the pan. “see, problem solved.” he stated triumphantly before sitting back down. “thank your favorite didi for saving your life, i’ll accept repayment in the form of buying me food for the rest of my life.”

It was debatable whether Yi was panicking with a good reason or not, obviously any functioning human or any human with common sense could tell that this very very small fire was no harm, or well a little harm, but if they just extinguished it (which could be done very easily), then most likely nothing would happen. So that was the argument for why he was an idiot panicking with no reason, but then… how can you also say that he isn’t a complete fool…? Because he had never learnt this stuff, he has never learnt common stuff. Yi watches movies and watches TV, but he rarely ever does that because he finds it boring, and Yi tries his best to not communicate with other people too much. Yi can easily walk on the street while not noticing a single person, all his friends could stand in front of them and he has the talent of completely ignoring them, not even noticing that they’re there. And why does he have this talent? It was a talent his parents gave him by scaring him of the whole world, hence Yi is too scared to learn, can he not read it in a book, then he doesn’t know about it.

So when Yuanjun tells him they’re not dying, he doesn’t believe it, not the least, because he’s smart enough to know that a fire is a dangerous thing, hence what is right in front of him is a dangerous thing. And Yuanjun’s cough doesn’t help it, no it actually makes it worse, now death just seems closer, he can see Yuanjun being poisoned by the smoke, and he believes that he himself will get burnt down by the fire, so in his mind; the puzzles pieces work together; they will die.  “How can you say that we won’t die while dying”, Yi raises his voice slightly, but only very slightly. Yi squints his eyes, natural selection? Then… their so early death was fated? They could not do anything, and if was natural selection then wasn’t it a good thing? “I’ll accept my death pridefully then” 

The other continues to cough, this really makes Yi rise with panic, awe god dammit, his death might be fate but Yuanjun? Why is this Yuanjun’s fate too? He’s a young child, and while Yi does find him confusing sometimes, he sees the younger as someone cool, he looks up to the younger, and he’s sure the younger does not deserve this early death, not at all, they have a whole life and Yi wants them to live it so… maybe throwing himself over that fire to save Yuanjun won’t be that bad after all? He can die, not like he got some big purpose on earth anyway, he’s just a quiet confused boy, but Yuanjun? He shouldn’t die yet, should he? These thoughts, they make Yi look sad at the younger while biting his lip.

Yi widens his eyes as he sees Yuanjun making the fire go away…. what…. in the world? How did he do that? And so bravely, so easily? It doesn’t make any sense, it really doesn’t. “Yuanjun how?” Yi spits out immediately, he has always found Yi smart but now…? He’s bewilded, Yuanjun is even cooler than Yi ever thought him to be. “Only that? Buying you food for the rest of your life? That’s… not much, don’t you think? I’d be willing to do more… but okay? Ah, should we order food? Or do you want me to try cooking again?”

[fmdmingxing]

honest opinion

[fmdmingxing]

fmdjunsu

With the game, he honestly doesn’t expect his group members to play it too. There were some pretty cringe worthy things in that game and also it would just be weird for them to be manager of their own group. Also, they most likely wouldn’t have the time to even play with how their schedules are nowadays. This game was meant and focused for the fans and their enjoyment. The game was going to get positive results from fans, he can already see that. Who wouldn’t want to be their manager? But then again, they probably don’t realize the amount of stress that can come with being a manager.

Hearing that Yi needed a summary of the game he wonders if the younger wasn’t listening when the game was first explained to them. To be asked this it was most likely that Yi didn’t pay attention. Also, he notices that the younger was still playing with his hair and didn’t make a comment about it. He was going to let Yi play with it until he was satisfied. “To summarize basically the player is thrown into the past before we became Origin and they become our group’s manager and help us debut. There’s also that alternative universe storyline of each of us and I’m not too sure of the point of it is? I guess it’s to show what each of our lives would look like if we didn’t debut in Origin.”

Yi suddenly notices how much he had been playing with Junsu’s hair and pulls his hands back “sorry for that” he whispers as he starts to play with his fingers that had just touched the older’s hair. Yi doesn’t really know why he likes playing with the other’s hair so much, maybe it’s because it’s so soft, or because it kind of feels like petting a dog, either way Yi often finds himself playing with the other’s hair, perhaps too much. He finds it nice that Junsu doesn’t say or do anything against it, but it also confuses him, if somebody was playing with Yi’s hair all the time, then at some point he would question why, and even if Yi isn’t the type to ask many questions, he’d probably still ask that whoever. What he would ask? Not fully sure, perhaps, do you like my hair, is my hair special, why do you keep playing with my hair? But none of those questions he had yet gotten from Junsu.

Yi squints his eyes when Junsu explains how the game works, that sounds stupid, perhaps it does kind of sound like something Genesis would play, but… Yi wouldn’t play it, it sounded complicated, and Yi is pretty sure it would feel weird being his own manager.  Yi repeats the last part in his head, their lives if they hadn’t been in Origin? Yeah… what would Yi’s life had been like? Would he just have debuted in another group? Or would he perhaps have become an actor like his dad and step-mom always strongly has encouraged, if he wanted to make his mom proud then he would become either a doctor or lawyer. Perhaps he’d prefer becoming a farmer, then he could have all those baby chickens he has always wanted. “Hyung, what do you think your life would have looked like if you had never joined Origin?”

[fmdmingxing]

call 911, because that’s a 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝗲!

[fmdmingxing]

fmdjiah

Jiah lived in a dorm for quite some while when she was about Yi’s age and it has been a couple of years since she finally moved into an apartment on her own, so managing crisis, as minimal as they might be, became almost a normality. She was just glad she could put off the fire before it set the fire alarm on.

Either way, she was glad that they managed to do this without no one getting hurt, and it proved that her hours spent watching kitchen reality shows didn’t go to waste. She was prepared to many things but seeing Yi crying wasn’t one of them. The smile disappeared from her face and she was almost certain her eyebrows were probably at her hairline at this point. She approached the younger idol and patted him a couple of times on the back, “omo omo, did you get hurt anywhere Yi,” she inspected him from head to toe, but at first sight everything was okay, “that was nothing love, just something we can handle with no problem,” she smiles at him and holds him by his shoulders, “do you want me to help you to finish this up, after a scare like this I hear we MUST eat Chinese food, for starters.”

He wasn’t hurt in any way, for sure he had just been scared to death a few seconds ago. He was sure that they were both going to die, but now he was simply fascinated, amazed at how Jiah had extinguished that fire, it was amazing, like as if Jiah had just done magic. Perhaps this was just Yi’s own stupidness, because he himself never ever had learnt how to extinguish a fire, the most he knew was that water could do the work, or that if he had burning chair then he should throw it out his window, or something among those lines. But basic stuff is something Yi had never been taught, he got high grades in school, but if life had grades then he would be failing at life, the most basic stuff like how to pet a dog can be confusing for him sometimes.

“I think I’m okay, did you get hurt?”, the way Jiah reacts slightly reminds Yi of how his mother used to treat him and how his step-mom treats him, like he’s a fragile, vulnerable baby made of glass and that he needs constant care. “I’ll admit I was scared haha”, normally Yi wouldn’t admit such thing, at least not after he had gotten scared, but Jiah made him comfortable enough to speak about his emotions like that. “I’m sorry, I’ll clean up, you really don’t have to worry about that”

[fmdmingxing]

fmdrem

@fmdmingxing​ ♥’d

and that was what happened when he dared entering with so much rush –the same rush on his cheeks as he noticed that in the recording studio there was no trace of his lover fellow rapper, but one other member of origin. “ oh, shit, i’m so sorry! i thought junsu was here. ” nevemind the lack of honorifics here, please. “ did you see him perhaps? ”

Yi looks up suddenly as somebody suddenly enters the room, it wasn’t expected and for a second he froze, it made him… uncomfortable in the beginning, but then he saw it was a familiar face, that it was simply just one of Junsu’s friends. He shakes his head, no, he hadn’t seen Junsu, despite actually having something to talk to Junsu about. “I haven’t seen him. Why are you looking for him?”

[fmdmingxing]

👀 are you pleased by the musical direction origin has been taking the past couple of years? do you resent the fame? do you wish you could be doing something else?

send my muse 👀 + and it’ll answer honestly! - open

He looks at his fellow member as a storm of questions suddenly come in his direction, oh my Joohwan, Yi’s brain doesn’t work that way, Yi can’t answer questions, he doesn’t have the brain for that. Yet because he’s so nice (NICE), he decides to use his brain and try his best to answer.

“I mean, the musical direction change we’ve had doesn’t really bother me, we’re still making music, and to me I guess music is just music. I think the fame is actually quite nice, suddenly I have a reason to not leave my house, like I’m busy all the time and have to leave my house, but when somebody I used to know comes to Korea and asks to hang out I can say ‘sorry, I’m busy being famous’ well not exactly those words, but you know what I mean. “

“I’ve always wanted a little baby chicken, perhaps I’d like to be a farmer right now with lots of baby chickens or something. I’m sure my mom wanted me to be a doctor, and perhaps that would’ve been fun, my dad wants me to be an actor, and whenever I think about acting I’m happy I became an idol”

[fmdmingxing]

👀 + what's your biggest regret?

send my muse 👀 + and it'll answer honestly! - open

Yi rarely ever thinks about what he regrets, and there’s a reason for that, because it makes makes him sad. “My biggest regret?”, he lifts an eyebrow, not exactly a question he wanted to ever get asked. “I think… I regret a lot of things. My dad and step-mom always tells me that I shouldn’t regret anything, because I am where I am now because of all of the things I’ve done but… I think I regret always being so stupid? Like I never speak, and when I speak I say like five words, that has led me to rarely ever becoming close to people. I think me and my mom aren’t close because we never spoke together, I mean now we speak almost every day, but when I call her it’s just me talking, now she’s the quiet one, it feels like… She doesn’t love me? I don’t know… I really don’t know what I regret the most”

[ofhotheads-blog]

Send my muse “👀 + a question” and they’ll have to answer with 100% honesty.

No deleting questions, either!

[fmdmingxing]

hellos guys

i was gonna do replies, but i’ve just been staring at my computer. the recent news... they make me very sad... i’ve been a mbb since the beginning and omg i’m a baby i cried KJHYGTF. i’m gonna be requesting a hiatus. i’ll still try doing replies but... very sad........... grvtfrdefjw 2c,m

xoxo juju

[fmdmingxing]

at least it’s an impressive fire, 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩?

[fmdmingxing]

durifmd

     after learning how to cook, you learn how to deal with things in the kitchen. at least, duri did because he would often watch cooking shows, especially the cooking shows in the west, had become something he quite enjoyed. that’s how he learned what he would have to do when it came to putting something like a kitchen fire out that had itself contained in a pot, before it could get any worst, to say the least. after retrieving the milk, duri gripped the pot cover, making his way over, he held the cover out in front of him, before pouring milk onto the fire. after doing so, he quickly placed the cover on top of the pot. he moved the pot to the sink, placing it in there, before opening it up slightly, and running cold water into it. “okay! we’re good!” he said, a soft giggle leaving his lips.

his heart was starting to beat less fast now, which made him feel a bit better. there’s another giggle that left his lips at the words. “you want my autograph?” he questioned, which just made another giggle leave his lips. “it’s really not that big of a deal! i just knew what to do!”

    Maybe Yi is an idiot. Yi has been called smart for as long as he remembers, probably since he was a child and could put together the puzzle pieces way faster than the other kids, or maybe since he learned to walk, because even that he learned way faster than the other kids. And for sure he's smart, his grades can you tell you that, however is he that smart? Not really, a term you could call him is a “smart idiot”.  Because while Yi might have high grades, he's stupid when it comes to everything else, basic stuff like how to put out a fire? No. That can definitely only be done by a fireman or those people in movies, not by someone as simple as Duri or Yi. Yet here he stood and had witnessed it himself, Duri putting out that fire without even as much as thinking about calling the police.

    He simply nodded when the other asked if he wanted his autograph, he really did, he wanted to frame his hero's autograph and hang it on his wall. He squints his eyes when the other says that just knew what to do, but how? How did they know such thing? "Ah, but hyung, how? How did you know what to do?"

[liwenhann]

Welcome to Wenhan’s preschool! 🏫

[fmdmingxing]

𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 tipsy

[fmdmingxing]

fmdyena

“what?” she asked a bit lost, the alcohol in her system and the rumble of voices and music in the background making it hard to make out what the other was saying. “oh, wait, yeah-” she moved so she wasn’t half on top of the male at the very least. “i’m fine.” the answer clearly a lie as her first attempt to get up only got her to fall back over once more, wow tonight really wasn’t her night.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to-” her slurred speech coming to a halt as she eyed the stain on his shirt, oh, that was probably her doing too huh. “-do all of this.” she concluded her sentence a bit awkward, only then looking up to meet the other’s eye and- oh shit, she knew that face. “ming? shit, fuck, sorry, my bad.” well, that surely would be awkward next time they were both promoting.

    Whether being drunk is a good or bad thing for Yi is probably a good question. Sober Yi is always so quiet, sober Yi rarely says whats on his mind, sober Yi knows how to keep his feelings hidden, sober Yi has more than just a little bit of self-control, actually if it's possible then sober Yi has too much self-control. And staying quiet can be a good thing, however staying quiet can also (often) be a not so good thing. Automatically if you're that quiet kid, then you will often be an out-cast, for Yi? That never actually happened, Yi has always had friends, he has just always managed to have friends and be with people without speaking.

    But then there's the bad things to being a quiet kid, for example being stepped over, being treated terribly, or containing a lot of feelings inside yourself, and then suddenly getting overwhelmed. But, (of course there's a but), drunk Yi is nothing, and I repeat nothing like sober Yi. Drunk Yi has rather much trouble containing feelings inside himself, drunk Yi isn't that good at keeping quiet.

    And yet even while Yi lays there down on the floor he doesn't fully understand why he went out to drink alone, because if he's alone then there's no one to stop him from stepping over the line, so it's just Yi fighting against himself to make sure he doesn't say anything mean or rude.

    Yi stops holding his breath when the other female finally moves away from him, he looks at her half-annoyed, not that he himself seems to be very hurt, but even drunk Yi is smart enough to know that the reporters could get stupid shit out of a small situation like this, drunk Yena on top of drunk Yi all out in public? Yeah that sounds like a really good headline huh?

    Yi laughs slightly as she finally recognizes him, perhaps it was better she fell on top of him rather than some angry or weird dude? "Don't apologize" he says quietly while sitting himself up, truly he wanted a more sincere apology, but that he wasn't going to ask for. "You recognize me? Even while that drunk? Are you sure you're fine? You're on your way home, right?"

[fmdmingxing]

honest opinion

[fmdmingxing]

fmdjunsu

He wonders if he can sleep while they were on their way to the location of their photoshoot. But then he doesn’t want his face to be too puffy at the same time. He’ll just probably try his best to stay awake for now and later on during the shoot sleep while he waits for his turn. He just hopes he can get enough rest to function for the rest of the day. He hasn’t been getting much sleep lately with how hectic Origin’s schedule has been lately.

When he sees Yi coming out of his house he waves to the younger. Since they were all out here now they could start heading over to the location of their photoshoot. Hopefully they can get it done quickly without any issues. Though who knows how long this photoshoot was going to last too considering what it was for. Junsu listens to Yi’s question as he watches the younger play with his hair. Junsu did notice how Yi would sometimes play around with his hair and he would let him since it didn’t bother him. Though, about the game Junsu wondered why it was created in the first place and just assumed Gold Star needed money so they were going to take advantage of Origin and create a game. With the game the company would see some sort of revenue for them. But, did he see himself playing it? Not really. “I don’t see myself playing it,” he shrugs. “I wouldn’t be able to handle all those cringe worthy moments that are in the game and it’s just really awkward seeing myself being a manager of our group.”

    A yawn escapes the younger’s lips. Before becoming a trainee Yi had never noticed how much sleep he needed and how much of his day he used on sleeping. Yi's schedule back in China had always been; school, home, homework, dinner, sleep, and then the same every day. If Yi didn't have too much homework or if he finished his homework fast then he would often sleep for as much as eleven or twelve hours a day. Now that Yi is an idol that's basically impossible to do, even on your days off, even when you should have time to sleep, there often isn't time to sleep. There's always someone you need to meet, even for Yi, the quiet kid who doesn't have too many friends, he oh so often uses his free days on others instead of himself.

    Yi almost doesn't catch the words Junsu speaks, he's too engrossed by the other's hair. Yi doesn't know why he finds it so calming touching the other male's hair, why he likes it so much, he just does, even after all the damage Gold Star has done to their hair it's still so pretty, Yi wonders how it's possible, how Junsu and himself (and the rest of Origin) isn't bald yet with all the times their hair have been bleached or dyed. Yi still catches the words, the other male saying he can't completely see himself play the game, Yi does kind of feel the same, to be honest he doesn't even fully know what the game is about, he was too sleepy when they got it told. "Hyung? Do you think you can explain the game to me?"

[fmdmingxing]

xing.mingxing i have an ear

view all xx comments

ravenbb_QUEEN when are you making a solo debut?

xingshines your ear is big

boyinluvwithxingyi i wanna lick your ear

[fmdmingxing]

at least it’s an impressive fire, 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩?

[fmdmingxing]

durifmd

he very much easily understood what it was like to be insecure. It was something that had very much come to, however more so in high school when someone had “dated” him for a joke. or when bc used to continually turn down any type of visual work for him, only accepting the osts for him. that was one that had hit him really hard, to be quite honest. no matter how much people told him how good looking he was or how much of a visual he really was, he didn’t believe it because of the work bc had not let him do (even though they had later finally let him do it once his solo career had fully kicked off.) then there was the guy last year that had really broke him, the one he wasn’t in a relationship in (he never had gotten a real relationship, to say the least.) but he was good now, he was finally loving himself, especially because he had gotten those jobs and someone who had finally made him feel like he was as incredibly good looking as everyone would say.

he couldn’t help but raise a brow when he heard the words from the other. then a small giggle left his lips, his head shaking a bit towards the other’s words. “ah, not to drink!” he began to explain. “i need milk to be able to put the fire out!” he exclaimed. “i also need a cover to put over the pot once i pour the milk in!” the older stated, closing the fridge. “is it out on the terrace?” he said, before he’s going to grab something to cover the pot just so he could go quickly.

    Duri wanted to put out this fire by himself? With nothing but milk and a cover? How could such thing be possible? Wouldn’t Duri need one of those fancy big red fire cars Yi had seen in the movies? Or was the cool Duri even cooler than Yi thought he was, able to put out a fire by himself? Was Duri some magical creature? Incredibly smart? The real-life version of Batman? How could Duri be even cooler than Yi already thought he was? This was amazing, almost tear worthy. Yi had invited the other over because he wanted to impress them, instead he ended up getting impressed himself, this was amazing, unbelievable, how could one man even be that cool.  He watched the other man as they grabbed something to cover the pot with and as they walked out onto his terrace to grab the milk, how cool, how could one man be so cool. Yi felt it pressing, the tears pressing, seconds ago he had feared death, and now he was watching a man safe him.

    He couldn’t help it, help it but letting a tear roll “Duri. Please let me have your autograph” he drove his sleeve over his face to get rid of the tears, embarrassed yet thankful. He was gonna hang the other’s autograph on his wall, and he would call his mom, she would most likely not care, but he would tell her about his near death situation and how Duri had saved him. This was a big moment for Yi, he was getting saved by someone as cool as Duri.