i just wanted to peek in one last time to say that i’m going to be dropping insoo.
i was considering taking (yet another) hiatus, but it seemed disingenuous to be putting off the inevitable, so hehe.. here it is! the inevitable
i know i’ve been giving apologies ever since... i.. got here..... but i never made my way through my ims & i don’t think i ever will, so.. for the final(!!) time,
i’m sorry ;; i can’t say just how much each & every one of you helped me through these past months, even if it was just dropping in to say hi or laughing at my Dumb Son-- but i’m rlly so! sososo appreciative ♡
honestly, i’ve just gotten to the point where i’m no longer comfortable publishing anything publicly anymore.... i originally thought it was a School Stress thing, but after finishing up the winter term, i think.. it’s rooted in a personal anxiety more than anything else, so maybe it’s time to take a bigger step back (or forward? or?? ahhhh????), & learn to look after myself!!
that said, i’m obviously.. going to miss everyone.... dearly, but
i know you’re going to take good care of each other!! nd that’s why i lov ya ♡
just rmbr to listen to ur mom, nd try 2 be healthy & happy, as always!
stay golden, famed 🌻
*peeks in* .. hhhhhh hi !!!!!!!!
after approx. three (3) millennia, i have,,,,,,, finally,,,, ,, , returned!
to all the lil bubs i’ve yet to meet, hi hello!! i’m nari & i play Walking Disaster cha insoo!!
-- i’m sorry i wasn’t able to welcome you in on time, but i’m real happy to have you here.. & i hope to talk to you soon (* ˘◡˘ *)♡!!!!
anw! .. if you’d like to maybe plot, re-plot, or keep plots with this kiddo, plspls give this post a lil like !! -- seeing as i’ve been gone since.... *checks watch* .... the Beginning of Time, i'm completely open to changing up or dropping any & all plots that don’t work anymore ^^
( -- alternatively, if you’re ok with keeping things as they are OR just like winging things, feel free to drop me a song rec in the replies, & i’ll whip up a lil text starter 4u wwwww... )
thx 4 dealing with my Mess, like.. always... -- i rlly missed ever1 to the moon nd back, & as soon as i work up the drIVE to start answering IMs again, i will!
( D E A R E S T , you sound a lot like love ) ⋆ spotify
on monday, you're told there should be butterflies.
love is a dizzying spell, they say-- it makes you weak in the knees, your heart stutter beneath your ribs-- .. but you haven’t yet experienced anything so extraordinary, anything so profound. romantics believe it’s because you’re in a period of waiting; you haven’t met The Right Person, but you will. and maybe when you do, all the ballads on the radio, the kisses on the silver screen, once-upon-a-time’s and happily-ever-after’s will start to make a bit of sense. after all, you’re too young to be a cynic now; you don’t want to believe love doesn’t exist. you desperately want it to. -- something so wonderful, so delightful, so powerful should exist. it has to.
on tuesday, your patience wears thin.
you’re filled with a dull sort of dread that you’re falling behind, that because your heart hasn’t done its fair share of somersaults, it’s defective, broken-- maybe it doesn’t exist. you wake up to kiss-swollen lips, purple bruises trailing down your neck, and sometimes, you’re in the arms of strangers. .. it’s warm in a way that you know is only temporary, but you don’t want to brave winter alone; your hands are always so damn cold.
tuesday is the day you meet Her. and from then on, everything changes. -- from the very start, you know she’s something special; her laugh has a musicality to it that makes you want to hear it over and again, and you want to write it into symphonies, have it immortalized in song. you kiss her, call her ‘baby,’ pour all of yourself into a relationship that’s supposed to make you feel something-- but like always, there’s still the absence of butterflies. there’s the absence of a rush, a spark, anything at all. you come away with nothing but a disappointment in yourself, and the realization makes all that you do - every action, every word - seem like a lie. you hide away because you’re ashamed. you turn cold. you break her heart and never learn to forgive yourself.
on wednesday, you recover.
you finally invest in a pair of gloves and learn to love your winter, in all its biting chill and shivering trees. you meet others who teach you how to kindle a fire within yourself, and then? when you’ve learned to find beauty in the snowflakes that catch on the tips of your lashes-- what then?
the oddest thing about wednesday is that you start to fall in love.
-- you fall in love with mondays and tuesdays, every season that makes up who you are and who you have been and will be. then you fall in love with people, the way they move and speak, think and feel. -- you fall in love with the corners of song mina’s mouth when they’re pulled upward into lazy smiles, the glow of the sun when it reflects against her skin in the warmth of late afternoon. you fall in love with the steady inhale and exhale of choo jihoon’s sleeping form, long limbs curled up on the edge of your bed and dreaming peacefully, for once, just as he deserves. you fall in love with your name and the way chae hyunmi speaks it, the criticality etched in her disapproval and dismissal (the softness she hides in every word). you fall in love with bae daeyeol’s eyes and how they’re expressive in a way words can never be, how, after years and years of knowing him, they’ve never changed and never will. you fall in love with choi hyejung’s long hair and the way she tosses it over her shoulder when she laughs, the sound of it reminiscent of youth and purity and spring, its infectious nature. you fall in love with midnights spent with lee sooyeon, her tiny frame wrapped in an oversized quilt, like there’s strength in fragility, vulnerability in power, depth and complexity and brilliance. you fall in love with the solace you’ve found in ash kwon, the calm that washes over your every fear, unease, apprehension - the reassurance you’re given in seeing just his dimpled smile, in hearing just his gentle voice.
you fall in love with cha insoo, who once longed for butterflies in mid-february. cha insoo, who wanted so desperately to have a heart. cha insoo, who pressed kisses to people he didn’t love and hid himself away in people he did. you fall in love, cha insoo. -- you’re in love.
you’re in love.
.
D E A R E S T , T R A C K L I S T
i. autumn breeze; jida, feat. rachel lim -- ‘ i can take you far, far away - far enough for us to disappear. should you feel a little scared, know that i’m still right here. it will be a little bittersweet; it might even feel a bit surreal. just see the stars run past you, as you drift apart in air. ‘
ii. boy; offonoff -- ‘ i want to see the sky. i’m on my way to you now; i don’t know how to stop. i’ll put on my shoes to take you to a beautiful place, a place for the both of us. .. so let’s leave, go over the moon. ‘
iii. take me; miso -- ‘ do you have something to say? ‘cause the feelings in my mind cannot escape. would you ever take me? ‘cause my heart is all i carry. the feelings in my mind, i cannot explain. ‘
iv. sarah; car, the garden -- ‘ oh sarah, my dear - before you long for somebody to see, remind the time you dreamed, just like we did in january. oh sarah, my dear - before you want somebody to kiss, try to cry with him, just like we did in april in last year. ‘
v. fall; crush -- ‘ at dawn, i open the front door, and a familiar silence greets me without fail. warm winter, lazy spring, hot summer, they all pass me by. during all four seasons, my dream was you - but fall is what stays inside my room. ‘
vi. nostalgia; crush -- ‘ don’t think, don’t worry when you’re listening to this song - i’m by your side like a mirror, a familiar image. even pointless complaints are okay. our evening avoids the city’s noise. you’re sleeping soundly, and like a warm blanket, i’ll cover even your deepest pain. ‘
vii. snow; zion.t, feat. lee moonsae -- ‘ i wish white snow would be outside tomorrow morning, then i’ll make you a warm cup of tea. just stay by my side, promise me. - will it snow when we’re asleep? will it snow on top of your closed eyes? will it snow when we draw back the morning curtains? will it snow? ‘
viii. i’m in love; park jiyoon -- ‘ i love you.. i love you, i love you.. ‘
ix. try again; taeyong & ? -- ‘ even if this repeats, you should know that i’m always on your side. please remember my answer is you. even if we have to go around a long way, i will still feel the same. we’ll be alright. i want to try again. ‘
x. autumn breeze (london); jida, feat. rachel lim -- ‘ like the leaves riding on the autumn breeze, like the days gone too far for us to seize, we move on and leave it as it is, but once in a while, let the reminiscence brighten this melody. ‘
valentine’s comes and goes, like it does every year, in a flurry of pinks and reds and whites. insoo spends his holiday avidly watching reruns of romantic dramas he hasn’t kept with, fielding the occasional text from a Bitter Single or Distressed Date, and-- all in all, february the fourteenth is uneventful. -- in the days that immediately follow, sentimentality still lingers like an afterthought, in snippets of conversation regarding nights varying from delightful to disastrous. for insoo, the usual mundanity is quietly eclipsed by an impulse that hasn’t manifested itself in years. he finds himself struck by the notion that he’s spent nearly every valentine’s day more or less alone, and it doesn’t bother him as much as it piques his curiosity-- what is it like to set aside one day for a someone (or multiple someones), just to show them they’re loved?
he turns the question over and again in his head, until soon, it’s all he can think about. -- without any prequel whatsoever, the need to know and learn and experience overshadows any attempt at social eloquence, and just like that, he finds himself asking, “do you want to be my valentine?” mid-conversation, completely disregarding the fact that valentine’s has really just come and gone. he blinks owlishly at his own outburst, then backtracks. “i mean, hypothetically. if i had coupons to shake shack, and i asked you to go out with me, would you? -- .. because not-hypothetically, i do. and i will ask you, if you want to say yes.”
RIZO and Vivienne Release Dimensions Portal Song “So Far Away”
Following busy years for both RIZO and Vivienne as members of Alien and WISH respectively in 2017, the two have paired up to release a song on Dimensions Portal to begin 2018. “So Far Away”, as the track is titled, is an emotionally raw song baring both idols’ souls. Although it doesn’t have a music video accompanying it, the song combines RIZO’s rapping with Vivienne’s vocals to weave a dreamy tune so vulnerable that it stands strong on its own. The song’s lyrics were written by both RIZO and Vivienne and the music was composed by RIZO.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Chae Hyunmi[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Always shuns me[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Claims she doesn’t love me[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : But still makes my life so sunny 🌞 ~~~
Send “&” for a LOVING text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : I keep thinking about that dumb face you make when you’re around food ???? Your eyes literally light up, smile looks like it’s going to split your face in two, that one ????????[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : I like it
[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : You look stupid
Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Idk what’s up with Pekan[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Every time I play a KARD song, she stares wistfully out the window….
[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Maybe she misses you?[ ✉️ ➝ 🕷️ chae hyunmi ] : Or maybe that’s me projecting
[ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : And ok, I realize that sounds like something from a cheap romance novel[ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : But sometimes you seem more of a person than people I’ve actually met,[ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : Does that make sense?
[ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : … It doesn’t. [ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : Oh my god, of course it doesn’t[ ✉️ ➝ 🎁 ] : Just block me alreaDY
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Help, I can’t think up a shitty pun to make you laugh[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Do you need a laugh? Are you stressed?[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : In the middle of a crisis? [ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I’ve got you
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I love you so much, nothing else can compare![ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Like a wildfire, you set my heart aflame 😍🔥[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Until all that’s left of it is…………….. Ash ✌️[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : OhhhhhhhhHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhHHHHHH
Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : ASH KWOUN!!!!!!!! ☁️🌟💝😸😸[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I KNOW IT’S LAT,E BUT I MISXS YOU TO DAETH!!!!!!!![ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : WREHE ARE KYOU ASH!!!!!!!??! WHERE DIID YOU GO[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I’M DRULNK!!!!!!!!!!
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : ASHHHHHHHHHHSHSSS\H.HHSH.SSH[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Whbere awre you goign that I xna’ct find you… 😭😑😲[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Whyy c’nat I fnid you 😢😢😢😢😢😢
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I’m so sorry
Send “&” for a LOVING text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : @theloveofmylife what’s up[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : How are you feeling - Better? Getting there?[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I know I’m not the best at… this ㅎㅎ[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : But you do know I think the world of you….. right? Oceans in your eyes, sunbeams in your smile, everything everything everything?
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I know that it hurts.. That you give so much of all that you are and come away with nothing. I know that you blame a lot of it on yourself, and I’m sorry[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : For taking and not giving enough back
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I want to be a person that you can run to…[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Someone who holds you through your sadness. And your fears. Anger, disgust. Joy and excitement! I want to be[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : A home, ig[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Warm, like the one I’ve found in you
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I love you, Ash Kwon! I really do[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : I love you[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Please always remember that
Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Guess what month it is 😏[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : That’s right! February!! The month of love[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : It’s the end of winter. Birds are singing. Flowers are in bloom[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Taeyong is gonna drop a single to break my whole goddamn heart
Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Been thinking a lot about time travel
[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Like, if you could go back and change things, you would, right?[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : You wouldn’t want the life you have now.[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : But [ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : If going back meant that we’d never meet each other….[ ✉️ ➝ 🌜 ash kwon ] : Would you still?
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Hey, Lee Sooyeon![ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : It’s cold today, so don’t forget to layer up[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Don’t get sick![ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : But if you do, I have ginger tea,[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Cold medicine,[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Extra blankets.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Your health is important[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : And honestly, I’m kinda worried about you[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : So just stay warm????
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : It’s cold today. Please don’t die 😌
Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Yleonyeon, csan you even believqe duckrlings exist? All they watn tto do iws enjoy life and swim in circles. Txheyre just quacking happily, you mfeed them trail mix and they’re just tso happy!!![ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : We do not deserve tyhem, they need to be protecdet at alnl co.Sts. Like you!!!
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I just want mto protect yo!U!, is that too muych to askq
Send “ø” for a LATE NIGHT text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : My brain is nagging me to finish this last verse[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : But everything I write is so[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Hollow?
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : If you’re awake, can you look it over 😔[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Think you’re the only person who’ll get what I’m trying to say….
Send “✘” for a HATEFUL text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I know your management doesn’t want to treat you like a human being, but that doesn’t make you any less of one[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : You need to take better care of yourself, Sooyeon. I mean that[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : When you try to make light of the situation and joke about it, [ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : It honestly freaks me the fuck out[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : So please just [ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Take yourself a little more seriously
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : As if you needed more people telling you what to do[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I’m sorry
Send “&” for a LOVING text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Hello Miss Sooyeon~~ You’re really talented, a creative genius with unlimited potential. I like that about you, you’re great![ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I just[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Need to make sure you know that’s not why I like *you*. [ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I’m not even sure I can put it into words, but
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Being with you is. Comforting?[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : You’re mornings in studio and nights out with fried chicken ㅎㅎ[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : In my life, you’re a constant now[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : And I like you here 😊 ![ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I feel like I’ll always find my way back to you
Send “♀” for a HEARTBREAKING text.
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Sorry for leaving early last night
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I just
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I don’t know how to explain this[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I looked at you
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I really looked at you and[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Ig there are a lot of things I never noticed…[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Or didn’t care enough to
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : You just seem[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : Not happy. I don’t know[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : I really don’t know
[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : How are you doing? Let’s start there[ ✉️ ➝ 🍒 lee sooyeon ] : How have I never asked you that
of all the humans insoo had encountered during his stay on planet earth, noah han was by far one of his favorites. -- he was warm in a way that wasn’t immediately apparent ( a touch of sun in february, golden rays on a morning of snow ), and insoo had felt compelled from the very start to learn him, to know him with a genuine sort of curiosity that developed quickly into a genuine sort of care. "i think it’d be fun to explore outer space with you, hyung,” he said, forgoing all context and offering a hypothetical out of the blue. what he meant to say was -- ‘i think there’s no one i’d rather be with, shopping for groceries at nine in the evening’ -- but was that sentiment any less bizarre?
he steered them toward the snack aisle first, tossing three packages of whale crackers into the basket that hung on his forearm, then hesitating at a fourth. “maybe i could leave one in your studio,” he mused, quietly. -- then, as an amendment, “for emergencies. -- we could get two extra. one for me and one for you!”
[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Ok so I might have roped some trainees to play tag with me, and I[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Might have told them that you’re one of the designated safe zones[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : So if random teenagers attach themselves onto you, yelling ‘SAFE’[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : That’s the reason
Send “⁇” for a DRUNK text.
[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Seoa[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : You thikn i could fit myself into la washing machin?[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Is it a good idea lto try[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Ipsn’t it always a godo idea to try????
[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Stuck
Send “%” for a CURIOUS text.
[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Do you think a sports bra would make a good slingshot[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : Follow up: do you think I could borrow one of your sports bras
Send “ツ” for an EXCITED text.
[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : WHALE CRACKER SNACKS ARE BUY ONE GET ONE FREE[ ✉️ ➝ nam seona ] : 1+1 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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![Peach [ft. 수란 (Suran)]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_p77a93U0FM1rgvwoco1_1523751593_cover.jpg)
