Getting better at becoming a ghost @foggy-dew - Tumblr Blog

gayjimothy

a scientist and an icon

starcrossedcherik

But how can you leave out the line where our girl says “You didnt really think I was in love with you?”

Shit was iconic

gayjimothy

here you go:

thatsthat24

The Mood of the Month 💢

tim-lucy

things to look for in a man: 1. jake 2. peralta 3. jake peralta

jenndoesnotcare

I just left my husband alone with our two children for sixteen days. I was not worried about anything regarding the house, their food, or their wellbeing. I put all the appointments in the family calendar and my husband checked it and kept them. I literally did not worry about them. I missed them, and I was sad that they missed me, but I didn’t worry about them AT ALL. I need to impress upon you all that I missed their company, but was not worried for their welfare.

I also did no meal prep. I don’t even think I went shopping right before I left.

This is not about apples and oranges. This isn’t even about my husband. This is about the fact that this is apparently WEIRD.

Another mum at my daughter’s school is leaving for ten days. She’s taking her youngest (who is a very small baby) and leaving her husband with their two girls. She has been cooking for days preparing freezer meals. She’s panicking and deputizing her six year old to remind him how to make school lunches. AND I AM APPALLED.

A) He is definitely not helpless. (He’s a doctor or something.) What gendered bullshit. B) THAT LITTLE GIRL IS NOT OLD ENOUGH TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HER AND HER SISTER’S WELLBEING. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. C) Why is she married to this person and creating children with him if he’s this big of an idiot?

While she was laughingly recounting this, the other mums were nodding and smiling sympathetically, like oh yes, I too have my caveman at home!! Such managing required! I was the only one who was like “Dude, he’ll be fine. Literally. He will be fine.” I said it a lot. She was not convinced. She kept bringing up her older daughter. She’ll be like a little mum!

NO.

NO NO NO NO.

NO.

Straight women, don’t do this shit. It’s gross. Don’t infantilize your husbands and then expect your daughters to pick up the slack. So fucking gross. So. So. GROSS.

foggy-dew

So I dug this post out to point out how mothers of boys prepare their sons to act as helpless, as their wives expect them to. My mum passed away few years ago and a lot of things around the house had to change. I took care of almost everything as I was the only one who knew how to do such things as using washing machine properly. But I got tired quickly, so I asked my father and sister to help me out, at least a little. It was really hard with my dad, he had no need to clean after himself, he was shocked that he had to cook now. He didn’t have to help us (two teenage girls) with anything, he was the one who needed help and had to be educated in basic household duties. I was really sick of that. One of very few things I made him do was dishwashing - he had to do it twice a week, not too much I guess. One day we were visiting his parents and he mentioned doing it the day before, not complaining, it just came up in the conversation. But my grandma couldn’t take it, she said, with an actual terror: “You mean that YOU are doing the dishes? But you have two girls at the house, why would YOU do that?”. I have never been angrier with her and I just couldn’t cope with the fact that a WOMAN said it. That attitude made her son the way he is and it made him believe that it is absolutely ok to think and act like that. Those ladies described in your story are going to raise their boys exactly the same and it really makes me sad.

#parenting #feminism