How are you? God it's so weird to think about how we're all grown up and doing our own thing. When was the last time we were all together? I wish I had that moment captured in picture so that I could cherish it forever. It's so hard to let go of the old times when it seemed like nothing would ever change. I don't feel like myself anymore. I feel like a new person that I'm desperately trying to get to know before she too slips away. I'm trying to figure out where I belong again, it's like just as I start to think I found it every thing changes. Things are changing faster than I can even keep up and I wish I could just go along easily with the ride but it mostly just feels suffocating. I feel like I haven't taken a deep breath in months and I really need to but I just don't know how. Sometimes I want to scream all my angst and hurt to the world but its just easier to hold it in and cry in the middle of the night when nobody else can here me. I wish that I had the time to go back to the little girl I used to be and tell her to slow down and open her eyes more and take in all the things that she loves because she's going to miss it all so much someday. I keep telling myself over and over again that everything's going to be ok, everything's going to be ok, but its getting so hard to believe.
