oh i need more of zanka and raider!reader plsss oh pls oh plss like have him join the raiders cuz he #needthat or smth just feed me
— i’ve been waiting for someone to ask for part two or something similar to the last one 😫😫
part one — slight ooc zanka cs we all know he wouldn’t be a raider but this is #fortheplot, gn!reader, toxic relationship, codependency, fleeting possessive and sadomastic behavior, minor jealousy, and hypnosis mixed with emotional manipulation ?? also not proofread 😓
zanka slowly raised his hand, fingers twitching as he reached for you.
his fingertips ghosted over yours before he snapped his hand back, his staff thrusting forward and nearly landing an attack to your abdomen.
“i didn’t know cleaners made moves like that. thought all of you guys were supposed to be chivalrous— remain ethical about what you do no matter what.” you tease, dodging his attack last second before increasing the distance between you two.
ethics was the last thing he wanted to hear come from your mouth.
you, with the vital instrument that hypnotizes people.
you, with the ability to not only turn others into mindless zombies but manipulate their senses on a frighteningly detailed level.
you, who has no right to speak ethics.
“and i didn’t know raiders were required to be sadistic assholes.” he scoffed, narrowing his eyes at you.
who else could he have met?
“..what did jabber do?” your face steeled, the thought of another person even touching him enraged you.
“does it matter?” he questioned mindlessly, fingers tapping against his staff restlessly. it was presumptuous of him to assume that you would actually fight him.
“it’s you, zanka. of course it does.” you reply without missing a beat, fingernails digging into your palm.
he bit his lip, eyes flickering to the floor before meeting back with yours.
“you should focus more on yourself.” he muttered, voice lower than before.
that was the issue with you.
no matter what he did you remained obsessed with him. he left you without saying a word, he took advantage of your loyalty, and you’re still utterly devoted.
it made him feel awful and conflicted and an asshole and— and—
..like he just didn’t deserve you.
“i love you. no amount of ass beatings is gonna change that.” you made your way towards him without an ounce of care.
“i’ll fight for however long it takes to—“ the branching tip of his staff made contact with your rib, causing it to erupt a sickening crack.
“—get you. i want you by my side—“ he hits you again, this time across your jaw. your body ached and screamed from the pain, injuries increased with each word that made it passed your lips.
“—forever and nothing else.” he slams the bottom of his staff into your abdomen, your throat filling with stomach bile before escaping from your mouth.
he could take his anger out on you all he wanted. if this was what it took to make zanka yours, you’d do it a million times without a single ounce of hesitation.
“i really do want you zanka.” you sputter out, blood spilling down your chin. you stared up at him from the floor, love sick.
he froze, the cogs in his head turning faster than usual.
you want him out of your own volition? not because he’s what you physically require to continue living?
who in their right mind would go to such lengths for a want— not a need? was he even worth the trouble? if you said he was.. if you truly were right all the time.. then maybe he is worth it.
but he wasn’t quite sure how he felt about that.
“what did you do? i feel— i feel like i’m actually considering the bullshit you’ve been spewing!” he scowled, looking down at you.
..your vital instrument wasn’t activated at all.
your head robotically turned towards zanka, your eyes wide shot and stained with disbelief. he visibly stiffened before taking a cautious stance, fingers wrapping tightly around his staff.
was he serious? if he was, theres a chance he was more emotionally vulnerable than you had initially thought.
a chance that you wouldn’t have to to the extreme measure you were originally going to use.
“i’m not using my vital instrument zanka.” you admit, furrowing your eyebrows.
“it’s really you who’s considering it. you know i wouldn’t lie to you.” your words made him take a step back, tripping over his feet and landing on his backside.
that wasn’t true. it couldn’t be true.
“that’s.. you—you..” he stammered out, shaking his head slightly. stray strands of hair fell out of place, accentuating his disheveled expression.
slowly, you moved closer to him, taking advantage of his moments of vulnerability.
you were telling the truth, and that devastated him.
if he couldn’t tell the difference between his own thoughts and the one you plant in his head.. was anything ever actually your fault? was he pushing the blame onto you because that just so happened to be convenient for him?
“i’ve been watching you, y’know.” you whisper, your hands snake up his face slowly. the sides of his face were trapped im your hold, thumb tracing small circles on the surface of his skin.
he was as pale as a ghost. instinctively, he swallowed the lump in his throat, waiting from you to continue.
“i see how you look at rudo. how you look at everyone there.” you add, tilting your head to the side as you coo at his features you’d been longing to hold again.
zanka hated this. he hated how you made him feel, he hated how pathetic he was, and he hated how right you were all the time.
he felt overwhelmingly disgusted with himself. this was not an appropriate relationship a cleaner should have with a raider.
he should not have to repetitively seek out your validation. he should not purposefully make himself easy to follow. he should not feign lack of awareness to the way you horribly stalk him.
maybe being, no, staying with the cleaners wasn’t something he should do either.
“come with me zanka.” you propose with a smile, your eyes narrowing into crescents.
joining the raiders was the last thing he’d do. it just simply wasn’t a place he could see himself fitting in. but at the same time, where exactly would a guy like him belong?
“not the raiders— me.” he froze, subconsciously turning his gaze towards you.
that’s it. why didn’t he think of that sooner? only you understood him, so it doesn’t matter where he goes if it’s you he’s with.
— an angel gains its wings every time get the chance to write a morally grey mc..