The hot pan grazed the inside of my wrist, just barely, but my knee jerk reaction lead to me throwing the lemon sugar cookies on the counter with a loud yelp. As if pain was a trigger, I felt my snitches go taut on my other hand, a reminder of the last time I had stayed late baking.
I growled at the analog clock on the wall, a reminder that I was too tired to still be here and that’s why my inner wrist now had a throb to it. Who knew opening a bakery was a walking workers comp report? Or maybe I just shouldn’t be baking late into the late night, when the sky becomes onyx and my eyes feel separate from the rest of my face.
My fingers reach over the turn off the oven, looking over the mess I still had left to clean up before I could catch the late bus that trudges a couple of blocks from the studio I had rented out. But it was worth it, all of it was worth it for this.
I glance to the front, a quick look at the now repaired window front had a small smile painting my face. I was struggling to come to terms with the agreement with the good doctor, but the Venmo payment for the ingredients for the lemon cookies with the line “Because they’re my favorite. No other reason.” made me feel a little more at ease.
I no longer overthought about when the next shoe that would drop, pathetically and natively I wanted to believe he wouldn’t pull the rug out from under me. I’ve simple told myself it’s no different than frat boys buying stocks in Apple and some tech company in San Francisco. I heard Jack utter the word “investment” last time he picked up his tea, and I decided he was right. It was an investment and I’d find a way to pay him back, properly, one day.
Until then, I would wipe the counters clean with the disinfectant spray and do my best to ignore the many different scars I was slowly littering my body with. Tossing the rag in a nearby bucket, telling myself it was a tomorrow problem and wandering to the front of the bakery. I looked over the calendar on my phone, wondering what I needed to get done tomorrow that I had gotten done tonight, when I heard the door knob rattle 10 feet in front of me.
I screamed, dropping to the floor and throwing hands over my head in fear it was somehow another gunshot and I was in line for a way more serious injury than a slightly burnt inner wrist. I waited a few seconds for the sound of shattering glass or yelling or really any noise to confirm the thoughts plaguing my brain, but nothing came except for the sound of a man clearing his throat.
I slowly lifted my head, letting my interlinked fingers fall from the back of my skull to the floor boards underneath me. Jack Abbot stood with an unimpressed scowl on his face at 1:56 AM at the bakery door.
“Uhm-” I tired to regain some leave of pride, “We’re closed?”
“Open the door,” he yells through the glass, unamused by my sarcasm, clearly.
I slowly stand, grabbing my tote bag that I had thrown half-way across the shop and finally making my way out for the night. The only difference between a few minutes ago and now was Jack watching me so close it made my limbs scared to move, as if I’d do the wrong thing and embarrass myself more than I already have.
“What are you doing here this late, Doc?” I slip out the door, not opening it all the way before relocking the door and spinning on my heels to properly face him.
“I was about to ask you the same thing, Miss Mack,” he crossed his arms over his chest, the Carhartt jacket stretching tight against his shoulders as he did so.
“Baking,” I answer easily, slipping around him to hurry to the bus stop across the street, “the last bus arrives at 2 so I’m in a bit of a hurry.”
“Bus?” His boot cladded feet easily followed me to the cross-walk, his pace keeping easy with mine.
“Yep, public transport is a big deal these days, I’m shocked you haven’t heard.”
“It’s 2 AM, why aren’t you home?” He was now shoulder to shoulder with me, his arms still cross and his eyes still closely watching me.
“Needed to bake those cookies,” I glance up at him, “The lemon ones.”
I go to plant my feet on the sidewalk, finally only a few feet away from the slightly lit bus stop, when a strong hand wraps lightly around my upper arms. I could pull away, his grip wasn’t tight, but the thought only of him touching me had me obeying the silent command not to move.
“Uh uh,” he voice was raspy and his eyes were piercing, “the hell is going on?”
“I told you-”
“You’ve told me nothing but excuses Miss Mack. I want the truth,” his voice was harsh but his eyes told a different story. A plead, a begging man for the truth. I let a shutter breath out, amused by the ghost that drifted passed my lips in the cold early October air of Pennsylvania.
“It’s not an excuse, I’m being honest. I stay late baking since I never have time during the day,” I shrug, tugging my arm from his grasp as I glance at the bus stop. The eerie single light post never made me nervous or the odd smell coming from the bushes, it was weirdly charming.
“Don’t worry about the bus, I’m driving you home,” his words pull my gaze back to him, my head already shaking back and front.
“I’m really far out Doc, I’m the last stop on the bus line,” I point helplessly at the stop, trying to get my point across clearly, but it was no use with that determine look in his eyes.
“Even more a reason for me to drive you,” he knocks his head in the opposite direction, “Come.”
The single word command should’ve made me mad, would’ve made me mad it I was anymore awake than I currently was in this moment in time; so I follow with one last glance at the bus stop.
“You know Gary is gonna be worried when I’m not on the bus,” I speed up to keep step with Jack.
“Gary?”
“The homeless man that sits on the bus,” I make a motion towards the bus stop again, waiting any second for the bus to arrive. “He’s my friends and we normally talk every Thursday when I go home.”
“Every Thursday? You do this that often?” Jack looked at me, almost offend I hadn’t mentioned this fact to him before.
“I just told you-”
“I know, I know,” he held both hands up, closing his eyes like the new facts about me pained him, “I’m an old man Miss Mack, you’ll have to explain to me clearly.”
“Oh you’re not that old,” I roll my eyes, but explain regardless, “I don’t have much time during the day with customers and budgeting and getting supplies, so I stay late a few days a week to get all the baking done for the next day.”
“Why don’t you hire someone?” Jack points to a truck, parked horribly in a parallel parking spot not far from the bakery, I cover my mouth in an attempt not to laugh.
“I can’t afford it,” I looked back to him with eyebrows raised and a smirk still lingering on my lips, “Hence the sugar baby gig I’ve got going Doc.”
“Right right,” he shakes his head, placing a gentle hand on my lower back as he reaches for the passager side door, “So bake at home?”
It was almost cute how he thought I hadn’t considered all this already.
Almost.
“Told you, live too far to travel with that many baked goods. I only give my customers the best,” I pull myself into the truck, crossing my arms as if I’m not grateful for the ride. Just before Jack closes the door I notice the bus speed by, Gary’s faced pressed on the window and searching the area with his eyes. I smile and wave, laughing when he points and waves back.
“Gary?”
“Yep,” I take my eyes off the back of the city bus to face Jack again, “Told you we’re friends.”
“I never doubted that,” Jack finally closed the truck door, I take my time to buckle myself in and take in the interior. The cheap black scented tree hangs on the review mirror along side a handicap badge glaring bright blue, the car almost feels new with how clean it is, and the leather feels soft under my fingers. I glance to the backseat, nothing but a set of crutches take up the seats.
“Break your leg Doc?” I spoke as soon as the driver side door ripped open, glancing over at his confused expression.
“What?”
“Got some crutches back there, I didn’t know you broke your leg recently,” I tried to remember a time when he came into the bakery with the crutches, but nothing was coming to mind.
“Oh-” his face lights crimsons in seconds, record time really, and he slowly pulls himself into the soft leather seat beside me, “Nah I didn’t, don’t know what those are doing back there.” He goes to put the key in the ignition, missing the small slit the first few times before it finally slots itself in.
“Okay,” I accept the answer without a fight, ignoring the weird way his shoulders reach his ears and the panic look over at the crutches.
“So, back to you Miss Mack,” his arm reaches to rest on the back of my seat, his body twisting to watch as he backs out back onto the road.
“I have no other defense beside this is my only option.”
“Address?” He starts North, looking over at me while I list off my address, he nods and makes no move to put it in the GPS.
“I know the neighborhood," he answers but I question, “What are you doing all the way out there?”
“One word: cheap.”
He nods as if it finally dawned on him, I’m still broke no matter the fact he’s sending me $50 dollars for ingredients or not. I don’t wake up and have it all put together because he put a couple hundred into fixing the front of my shop. No matter how grateful I am for that money, it doesn’t fix anything; just a bandaid over a bullet hole.
“I assumed you lived close to the bakery,” he spoke under his breath, as if he was embarrassed by his own assumption.
“I would live in the apartment above the bakery,” I do my best not to sound too star-eyed over the idea, “but the landlord it an asshole and has it being two different rents, no discount just because I own the bakery underneath.”
“How much?” Jack takes a turn, awfully fast, and dares to glance at me and I notice the gleam in his hazel eyes immediately.
“Nope, you aren’t getting it for me,” I shake my head, pressing my feet into the floorboards as if that will help me stand my ground. As if that makes me immovable.
“Miss Mack,” he pleas.
“Doc, I can’t ask that-”
“You didn’t ask,” his voice cracks as it raises, as if he hasn’t talked this loud in sometime, “I offered.”
“You sound like my grandmother when she slipped a fiver in my hand,” I puff my chest out slightly.
“I told you, I’m old Miss Mack,” he smirks in the review, making me mad he looks so charming when I’m denying him this.
“I can’t have you pay for my apartment, that’s a line.”
“Why is that the line?”
Do I tell him I’m scared he’ll take it from me? That I’ll wake up and he’ll start expecting things from me and I can’t escape because he owns my apartment?
I don’t say any of it, because Jack says it for me.
“If you think I’m gonna be an asshole and use it against you?” His voice cracks again, not from the loud octave of his voice but the from the seer emotions he speaks with, as if his heart is being craved from his chest and his hands to tied behind his back.
“I didn’t-”
“You don’t have to act like that isn’t a concern Miss Mack, I get it. Some older guys starts giving a gorgeous girl like you some money for no reason, you’re smart to be worried.”
His compliments wash over my like a warm shower in the winter, making my body feel cozy and light. But I push the feelings aside as he continues his rant.
“I meant it when I said I have all this money and nothing to do with it, but I didn’t think about how that probably sounds to you. I’m sorry-”
“Don’t apologize, I’m not trying to question your character-”
“No that’s okay, you should-”
“Okay!” I wave my arms in a cutting motion, sliening the once loud chattering car ride into one of labored breathing. I glance at him out the corner of my eye, watching him pull his lips into his mouth as if eating at them out of embarrassment. He looked as if he had his hand swatted at from going in the cookie jar, and I felt my laugh bubbling over before I could stop it.
“Oh now you’re laughing at me!” He tired to sound offended, and it was a half-way decent attempt, but the small smirk on his face and the raised eyebrows told a different story.
“I can’t help it!” I spoke between giggles, “You looked so injured!”
“My character was under attack and then you silence me with your arms like a first grader!”
I continue to laugh, the sound of his own eventually joined until the quiet radio was drowned out by our giggles and half-sorry attempts at defending ourselves. Suddenly the prospect of his man giving me a couple thousand didn’t seem so scary, not when I knew the way his crows feet looked when he laughed and how his giggles sounded like a rich dark chocolate. How could him, out of all people, hurt a fly?
“Okay,” I spoke once we finally quite our cackling, “What if we found a way for you the help with the rent without doing everything?”
“Ah a compromise,” he glanced at me as he took the final turn into the apartment complex parking lot.
“Yes,” I sit up straighter,”The Great Compromise, if you will.”
“Okay what do you got?” He puts the truck into park, leaning back in the seat with his arms over his chest and a smile painted on his beautiful face, “Hit me.”
“You can send me the difference of my rent here,” I nod to the sitting little complex before us, “and the rent above the bakery. Won’t be more than a few hundred but will help me out, a lot.”
He dramatically brings his thumb and pointer finger to his chin, looking up at the roof of the truck and thinking dramatically as if he was Socrates himself, plagued with thoughts of the future.
“Would that make you feel better?”
“Yes,” I don’t mention that it would make me feel less pathetic and less in danger of losing everything if the shit hit the fan. I definitely don’t mention that I’m starting to really believe he won’t let the shit hit the fan either, because he’s right it’s smart to worry. Right?
“Then it’s a done deal,” he holds his hand out to me, gesturing to shake it. I reach out, matching us palm to palm and wrapping my fingers lightly around his wrist. His fingers do the same, two rest right over my pulse point.
“You’ve just entered into a verbal contract with me Doc,” I smiled, “Hope you don’t break your word, I’ll sue your ass.”
He chuckles as I remove my hand and un-buckle myself from the seat.
“Good think I’m not known for breaking deals Miss Mack.”
We say our goodbyes and he agrees to reach out to me tomorrow with the money and offers to go with the to speak to the landlord, which I denied.
I start to trek back to my front door when I hear someone yell my name. I spin, grabbing the tote bag tighter to my chest and resting my keys in between my knuckle. I notice Jack’s truck hasn’t moved, his body turned as if he’s about to open the truck door and rush to me when I wave him off when I notice Gary slowly make his way over to me. Jack nods, but still doesn’t pull from the handicap spot he found himself in.
“Hi Gary, how was your day?”
“Pretty good,” he shrugs, his head nodding over to Jack’s truck, “I was worried until I saw you getting in the truck. You know that guy?”
I smile, glancing back over at the truck. Jack sat watching the conversation, not as if I can’t handle it but in case I want the help.
“Yeah,” I nod, “He’s a friend of mine.” And for the first time since the agreement, the word friends rolls off the tongue easily.
summary: you and clark have been best friends since college, and you know everything about each other—including his superhero identity—but tensions have risen since you started working with him at the daily planet, and after superman is exposed to a 'truth telling toxin' you decide to take a little advantage of the fact that he can't lie
notes: a little late to the party, but have a clark kent fic! sorry this is late (and i've been m.i.a.) i've been busy watching the film eight times, crying about the film, and having an existential crisis about the fact that i'll never love another man the way i love david corenswet... but anyway! i struggled a little with this, hence it taking so long, so i'm sorry if it sucks? but regardless, i always love to hear what y'all think, so please let me know!
warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption, it has some corny moments, some jealousy, lots of tension, very minor miscommunication, clark jokes about eating kryptonite, jimmy is a well-meaning meddler, italics, clark says 'gosh' a lot, and SMUT (making out, f oral receiving, fingering, unprotected p in v, dirty-ish talk, also it's a few thousand words of smut oops) 18+ ONLY MDNI!!!
word count: 21621
- Clark -
“It’s kind of pathetic if you think about it,” Jimmy says.
Lois rolls her eyes. “Don’t start, Jimmy.”
“I’m not starting anything,” he says, gesturing toward Clark with his coffee mug. “Just look at him. He’s like a golden retriever waiting for someone to throw the ball.”
Lois tries not to laugh, but a soft snort slips out before she can hide it behind a sip of coffee.
“I think it’s sweet,” Cat says, perching on the edge of Jimmy’s desk. “Being in love with your best friend is so… early-two-thousands romcom coded.”
Lois swivels in her chair to give Cat an incredulous look. “What does that even mean?”
“It means Clark is a nerd who’s hopelessly in love with a girl way out of his league, and it’s adorable in a tragic, pathetic kind of way,” Jimmy says.
“Jimmy!” Cat smacks his arm. “Stop calling Clark pathetic.”
“I’m not calling him pathetic,” Jimmy insists, still grinning. “The pining is pathetic. There’s a difference.”
“You’re still being a jerk,” Lois mutters into her coffee.
Their teasing continues, but Clark barely registers it. He hasn’t heard a word since the moment you walked through the door—hair mussed from the wind, a binder hugged tight to your chest. Perry intercepted you immediately, stopping you at the front desk to talk about the article you submitted late last night. Clark only knows this because he can hear every word from across the newsroom—the warmth in your voice, every shift and cadence he’s memorised over the years.
It’s not an accent or a twang. It’s just you.
The voice that lingers in his dreams, that echoes in the back of his mind whenever he’s flying through the sky, wondering if you’re thinking about him too.
It’s always you.
“Morning, team!” you greet cheerfully, dropping your bag and binder onto the desk opposite Clark’s.
Jimmy smirks, his gaze flicking toward Clark before settling on you. “Good morning, hot shot. What was all that with the boss about?”
Clark is staring—he knows he is—but he can’t help it. You’re just so goddamn beautiful. You have been since the day he first met you, and no amount of superhuman restraint has ever dulled the way you affect him. If kryptonite is his greatest weakness, you’re a very close second.
“Didn’t you hear?” you tease Jimmy. “I’m the new headliner.”
You grin, pretending to flick your hair off your shoulder with mock dramatics—and that’s when Clark notices it. The change. The subtle way your body reacts.
Your heartbeat picks up, quick and sharp against his ears. He can see it now—literally see the steady thump of your heart beneath your ribs, see the way the muscles in your chest tighten and your breath catches ever so slightly.
But why?
The question lodges in his mind like a splinter. Is it Jimmy? Is it something Jimmy said? Does he make you nervous? Does he make you excited?
Do you... like him?
Clark’s brow furrows. He tracks the heat rising under your skin, the almost imperceptible tremor in your hand as you lower it to lean on your desk—and then he freezes.
Oh, God. He’s staring directly at your chest. Through it, technically, but from the outside no one else would know the difference. His face heats, and he blinks hard, forcing himself to stop—to look away before someone notices.
“Better watch out, Kent,” Lois says, smirking over the rim of her coffee cup. “You might’ve just convinced Perry to hire your biggest competition yet.”
Clark clears his throat, pulling his gaze up to your face where it belongs. “Yeah, I think I did.”
You give him that cheesy little smile—the one where your nose scrunches up, your cheeks flush pink, and his heart stops—the one that slips into his dreams every damn night. He loves that smile. He loves your face. He loves you—and God, he hates that he’s too much of a coward to say it out loud.
He wishes he wasn’t.
He wishes—of all the powers in the universe—that he had the ability to rewind time. Then, he’d go back to college, back to the late-night study sessions and coffee runs and the years of friendship and banter. Back to that night, right before graduation, when he told you the truth about who he really is.
If he’d been half as brave as everyone thinks he is, he would’ve said—
I’m Superman. And by the way, I’m in love with you. Wanna make out?
Maybe then things would’ve been different. Maybe if he tacked it on to the big reveal, you would’ve fallen for him too—charmed by the whole ‘superhero’ thing.
And maybe by now you’d be doing everything and more than just making out. Because yeah, he wants to do a lot more than that. A lot more. Which is a real problem, because just thinking about having you—really having you—makes him dizzy enough to fly straight into a building.
He isn’t joking when he says you affect him like kryptonite. He doesn’t know why, but when it comes to you, he’s helpless. Powerless. He’s always felt things more deeply than most—because he isn’t like most—but with you? It's something else entirely.
He knows for a fact he couldn’t live without you. That’s why he convinced you to stay in Metropolis after college. Why he’s never stopped being your best friend. Why he got you the job at the Daily Planet—because weekends with you weren’t enough. He needs you every single day.
And that’s also why he’s never told you how he really feels. Because the way he loves you scares him—and if it scares him, what would it do to you? Probably terrify you. Maybe even drive you away. And he can’t risk that.
He can’t risk losing you.
So here he stays, hopelessly stuck in the friendzone, listening to you chat animatedly with Cat about some loser you met on Hinge who you’re going out with tomorrow night.
“His profile says he’s into hot yoga and smoking meats,” you say, holding your phone up for Cat to see.
It takes every ounce of—superhuman—self-control for Clark not to scoff.
“Baby girl, it also says he collects limited edition knives,” Cat points out, her brows drawn. “Are you sure you want to go on a date with this guy?”
You roll your eyes. “I appreciate the concern, but he’s the only half-decent match I’ve had in weeks.”
Cat blinks at you. “Seriously? But your profile is perfect. I made sure of that myself.”
“I know,” you sigh, your gaze sliding toward Clark—who’s very conspicuously looking anywhere but at you. “But I left my phone unattended on my desk a couple weeks ago, and someone thought it’d be funny to change everything so the only matches I got were Arkham escapees.”
Jimmy snorts at his desk, but his eyes stay glued to his screen like he isn’t blatantly eavesdropping.
“Clark,” Cat says, her glare narrowing at him. “Messing with her dating profile? Really?”
Clark’s head snaps up—blue eyes wide and full of faux-innocence. “It was Jimmy’s idea.”
“Dude,” Jimmy says, swivelling in his chair, “you really don’t want to start pointing fingers. Because I won’t hesitate to—”
“Okay!” Lois cuts in, standing from her desk with her empty mug in hand. “I’m going to need you all to shut up and get some actual work done before I lose my mind.”
Jimmy chuckles and turns back to his desk. Cat sighs, handing your phone back with a dramatic shake of her head. Clark glances toward Lois, mouths a quiet thank you, then lets his gaze drifts back to you—only to find you already watching him.
You’re wearing a that half-scowl, half-smirk look that makes his stomach flip like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t. He feels seen. Exposed. Almost like you’re the one with x-ray vision. Or worse, maybe you can read his mind.
He raises a brow. “What?”
“No snide comment about my hot-yoga-loving, knife-collecting, entrepreneurial date?”
His lips twitch. “Oh, he’s an entrepreneur? That’s impressive. Really sounds like you found a winner.”
“Entrepreneur is just code for broke,” Jimmy mutters.
You ignore him, your eyes staying locked on Clark. “So, you’re not going to warn me against going on this date?”
Clark shrugs, leaning back in his chair like he’s not affected. “Why would I? He sounds great.”
“He collects knives, Clark,” you say, tilting your head just enough to make it feel like a challenge. “Doesn’t that seem a little… murder-y?”
Clark smiles, leaning forward again until his elbows rest on the desk. “For your sake, I hope he’s not.”
“But if he is...” you press, voice dropping low. “You think there’ll be anyone around to save me?”
The way your lips curl, the glint in your eyes, that soft, sly note in your voice—it’s enough to make Clark feel uncomfortably warm. He always runs hot, but looking at you now? Teasing him like this? It feels like you’re daring him to lose control.
God, the things he’d do if you weren’t looking at him like that in the middle of the goddamn newsroom.
“You mean Superman?” he asks, his voice low now, matching yours. “I’m sure he’s got better things to do on a Friday night.”
Your brows shoot up. “Better things?”
“Maybe,” he says with a nonchalant shrug, but his throat feels tight.
“Well,” you murmur, leaning back in your chair, “you’d know. Considering how close you and Superman are. All those exclusive interviews…”
Jimmy snickers quietly, but neither of you spare him a glance.
“I hope he doesn’t, though,” you add, tone light but loaded, your smile lingering as your gaze slides toward your computer screen. “I hope he’s got nothing better to do. I hope he’s hanging around, just in case my date is a psycho and I need saving.”
Clark opens his mouth to reply when Steve walks by, cutting in like a brick through glass.
“Haven’t you been saved by Superman, like, five times already?”
Your cheeks heat, and Clark hears your heart pick up—a sound so sweet it nearly undoes him. Because he knows it's for him. Well, Superman technically, but Clark Kent is taking this win.
“It was once—maybe twice,” you say quickly.
“Actually,” Jimmy chimes in, “I think it was more—”
“Oh my God,” you cut him off, flustered. “Why is everyone so chatty this morning? Can we please just work?"
Steve rolls his eyes and keeps walking.
Jimmy frowns. “You and Clark were the ones—”
“Jimmy,” Clark says, his voice clipped in a way that makes Jimmy blink. “Seriously. Work.”
Jimmy throws his hands up in surrender and spins back to his screen. Clark waits a beat, then glances up over the low partition between your desks. The second your eyes meet his, he can’t help the small, smug curve of his mouth. You roll your eyes but can’t hide your own grin, and suddenly it feels like the whole newsroom has faded into background noise.
Because you’re looking at him like that—with those eyes—and lousy date or not, you still know exactly who’s going to show up if you need saving.
The rest of the day goes by like any other. Everyone gets lost in their work, debates flare and die out, coffee is chugged like it’s oxygen, and Perry yells at someone for a misspelled headline at least once. It’s fair, though—journalists should at least know how to spell. At least.
By three p.m., Clark can tell you’re deep into that afternoon slump—when the sunlight pouring through the big glass windows feels too warm, your last coffee was too long ago, and you’re one sigh away from curling up at your desk for a nap.
Clark secretly loves this time of day. He doesn’t get the same crash as everyone else, so it’s the perfect time to spoil you without you—or anyone else—raising an eyebrow. He lives for the way you give him that sleepy, dopey smile whenever he drops a chocolate bar on your desk, grabs something from the front desk for you, or—his favourite—when he walks down the block to get you a real coffee from your favourite café instead of the sludge in the breakroom that Perry insists on calling coffee.
He’s just about to do exactly that when he sees you drag your tired feet into the printer room and start stacking cartons of paper reams like some kind of reckless architect.
He stops at the doorway, brows furrowed. “What are you doing?”
You glance over your shoulder as you drop a third box onto the wobbly stack. “Building. What does it look like?”
“It looks like you’re five seconds from filing for workers’ comp,” he says, stepping into the small room.
The space is cramped, mostly taken up by the oversized printer and a few sad piles of paper—some blank, some the casualties of misprints. The back wall is lined with floor-to-ceiling shelving crammed with office supplies and random junk that no one has bothered to sort since, well, ever.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” you say with a small smirk. “I can still type with a broken neck.”
Clark is about to argue when you bend over and press your palms flat against the top box to test its stability. His words die in his throat. His eyes—traitorous, shameless—drop to the curve of your ass, barely two feet in front of him. He’s staring—again. He knows he’s staring, but he can’t stop—because apparently, all it takes to unravel Superman is you in a pair of fitted grey office pants.
Then you plant one foot on the unsteady tower like you’re about to climb Everest, and something in him snaps.
“Woah, no way,” he says, stepping forward in a blur.
Before he can think better of it, his hands are on your waist—warm, firm, and holding you steady as he pulls you back down to the floor like you weigh nothing.
The heat of you bleeds through the thin fabric of your shirt, and it’s dizzying. You’re too soft, too precious, and he has no business touching you like this. His breath snags in his chest, sharp and unsteady. He’s hugged you before—plenty of times—but this? This is different. This feels dangerous.
Then, of course—
“What’s going on in here?” Jimmy asks, grinning like an idiot as he leans against the doorframe.
“I was just trying to—” you start.
“She was just—” Clark says at the same time.
And then he hears it—your heartbeat, skipping once before it kicks into overdrive. Your body grows even warmer beneath his hands, and you step away quickly, like his touch was too much. His stomach twists.
You’re flushed. Flustered. Because of Jimmy?
The thought hits him like a punch to the gut. It has to be. What else could it be? You’ve never looked at him like that. Not Clark. Not the way you look—the way your body reacts—when Jimmy appears, always wearing that lazy grin, the one that apparently drives women wild.
“Hey, I’m not judging,” Jimmy says, raising his coffee cup in a mock toast. “The printer room is a classic. Just don’t let Perry catch you—he almost had a coronary when he found me in here with someone.”
Then he winks and walks away, strolling across the newsroom toward his desk.
For a second, Clark just stands there, jaw tight, the faint sound of your too-quick heartbeat still humming in his ears like static. He wants to say something—ask why you get all warm and pink every time Jimmy walks into a room—but he swallows it down. This isn’t the time. He doesn’t have the right.
Instead, he clears his throat and turns back to the shelf, reaching easily for the toner cartridge on the top shelf.
“This what you were risking your life for?” he asks, holding it out to you.
You sigh dramatically as you take it. “Yes, that. Don’t look so smug just because you’re freakishly tall.”
“Sorry,” he says, tone dry, “next time I’ll let you make the ER trip.”
You scowl up at him, lips twitching like you’re trying not to smile. “Well, not all of us can be eight feet tall and built like a Greek god.”
A slow smile tugs at his mouth. “Seven and a half, tops.”
You roll your eyes, but your cheeks are still pink. “You’re impossible.”
“And you’re reckless,” he fires back, soft but certain.
There’s a beat—a pause thick enough to feel. Your eyes hold his, that half-challenging, half-teasing look that makes his pulse thud a little harder. Clark’s not sure if you know what you’re doing to him or if you’re just being you, but it’s suddenly too much. Too warm.
Jimmy’s stupid grin flashes in his mind. He can still hear the way your heart had jumped when he appeared, the way you’d flushed—warm and flustered in his hands, but not because of him.
Clark clears his throat and steps back, shoving his hands into his pockets to keep from reaching for you again. “Try not to give yourself a concussion while I’m gone,” he says, trying for light, but it comes out a little too clipped.
You blink. “Gone?”
“Coffee run,” he mutters. “You look like you could use it.”
“Oh. Thanks,” you reply, with that soft, tired smile—like it’s just another small kindness between friends.
And it kills him. Because he doesn’t want to be just friends—not when Jimmy’s grin gets that kind of reaction out of you. He wants that reaction. He wants to be the one who makes you smile, who sets your cheeks on fire, whose presence throws your heartbeat off balance.
By the time he’s back out in the newsroom, his chest is tight and his jaw aches from clenching so hard. Jimmy is laughing with Cat at his desk, and Clark can’t help but picture you grinning at him like that. Laughing like that.
He swallows hard, grabs his jacket, and heads for the elevator before he does something stupid. Like break the sound barrier just to get to your favourite café and back, because apparently, that’s the only way he knows how to compete.
The walk helps. A little. At least enough for him to stop replaying the printer room in his head like it’s a crime scene and he’s looking for evidence of when, exactly, he lost his mind. He forces himself not to rush, because it’s not like you’re going anywhere. Most of the Planet’s staff will be chained to their desks until well after sunset—you included. Then he’ll walk you home like he always does, listening to you rant about something dumb Perry said or the latest atrocity the breakroom coffee has committed. God, he loves your voice when you’re like that—sharp, alive, unfiltered.
It’s pathetic, he knows—just as Jimmy had so graciously pointed out this morning—but Clark couldn’t deny it even if he wanted to. Because aside from saving the planet and doing as much good as one man—one Kryptonian—possibly can, he lives for you.
He hasn’t thought much about what he’ll do when you inevitably find someone. Someone who isn’t him. Maybe he’ll move to a red sun planet and sulk until he withers away. Or move to the moon and mope for all eternity. Or, hell, maybe he’ll just swallow a chunk of kryptonite and be done with it.
Because the truth is, he doesn’t think he’d survive it. Losing you to someone else would tear him apart in ways nothing else could. It’s the second-most painful thought in his head—the first being losing you in the other sense. The permanent, irreversible sense. Which is exactly why he should be trying to keep his distance. Why he shouldn’t need you like this, so badly it scares him.
But every time he’s tried to warn you, every time he’s told you that being close to him is too dangerous, you’ve just looked him in the eye and said you don’t care. That you need him.
And God help him, because hearing you say those four little words—I need you, Clark—is enough to bring Superman to his knees. In more ways than one.
“Uh, Clark?” Lois asks, head tilted, one arm holding the elevator doors open. “Plan on moving any time soon?”
Clark blinks, hard, and realises he’s back at the office. In the elevator. Holding your coffee in one hand and a paper bag with two warm pastries in the other.
“Sorry,” he mutters, shaking his head. “Daydreaming.”
Lois smirks as she steps aside. “Wonder what about.”
Clark steps out of the elevator and—of course—his eyes go straight to you, all the way across the bullpen. You’re at your desk, typing away with that little furrow between your brows, the one he could sketch from memory.
“I swear you’ve got a sixth sense just for her,” Lois says as she steps into the elevator. “Doesn’t matter where she is—you always know. Like your compass doesn’t point north. It points to her.”
Lois is a journalist, Clark knows that. Words are her weapon. But the truth of them still hits him square in the chest. He doesn’t mind the teasing, but he hates how transparent he is—how anyone can look at him and just see.
“You should just ask her out,” Lois adds lightly. “Put us all out of our misery.”
Before he can find an answer, the elevator doors slide shut and she’s gone—taking her sharp words and knowing smirk with her.
Clark waits a moment, draws a deep, steadying breath, then crosses the newsroom toward you. He can see the exposé you’re working on, the one you’ve ranted about a hundred times, and he can practically feel the focus radiating off you. It almost makes him hesitate—almost.
“Coffee,” he says, placing the cup on your desk. “And pick a pastry. Or we can split them both.”
You flinch slightly before glancing up at him with that dopey, tired grin. Your bottom lip is swollen and raw from chewing on it, and the sight alone makes something stir in his chest—and lower.
“Where’s my coffee?” Jimmy calls, spinning lazily in his chair.
Clark hears it again—your heartbeat, stuttering once before racing fast—and his chest tightens. He doesn’t want to regret getting you this job, but he’s starting to think he might have been better off leaving you at Metropolis Mail. You hated it there, but at least you didn’t have a crush on any of the old, sleazy men you worked with.
“Clark doesn’t like you like he likes me,” you tease, eyes narrowing at Jimmy.
Jimmy snorts. “And you know what? I’m grateful that he doesn’t. Otherwise, we’d have to—”
“Jimmy,” Cat interrupts from across the bullpen, “don’t finish that sentence unless you want me to staple your mouth shut.”
Clark settles at his desk, watching as you reach for the bag of pastries. Your cheeks are still pink—flustered, again—and he can hear your pulse humming too fast.
“Okay, we’re halving these,” you declare. “I’m not choosing between a chocolate croissant and a cinnamon roll.”
He smiles softly as you tear open the bag and flatten it on your desk. You split the croissant, then the cinnamon roll, eyes flicking between the halves before—like always—you pick the smaller pieces for yourself. He knows you do this every time you share food, even when it’s something you love. He’s only asked you about it once, and you’d just shrugged, saying he’s bigger so he gets the bigger piece.
But no matter how many times you do it, it still makes him feel special.
Then—before Clark can even think about standing up to grab his halves of the pastries—you lick your fingers. Slowly. A low hum vibrates from your chest, the sound unexpectedly loud in the unusually quiet newsroom.
Clark’s breath catches. His eyes flick up, locking on to the way you drag your fingers between your lips. It’s a simple gesture—intimate but mundane—except somehow, it’s not. It’s you, and suddenly the air feels charged—thick with something electric, something that has Clark’s body reacting before his brain can catch up.
He shifts in his chair, suddenly aware of how uncomfortably tight his trousers have become.
Jimmy snorts quietly at his desk, barely suppressing a giggle. Even Cat, a little further away, throws Clark a knowing smirk, eyebrows raised like she’s watching a sitcom.
Clark clears his throat, trying to focus on his screen but failing spectacularly. This—this slow, deliberate lick of your fingers—is a distraction he doesn’t want but absolutely can’t resist.
And today is the longest Thursday ever.
- You -
It’s not often you’re at work early, especially on a Friday, but this morning you woke up at six a.m. and couldn’t get back to sleep. No matter how many times you tossed and turned or fluffed your pillow. So here you are, chewing on the cap of your pen and glaring at the empty desk across from you—Clark’s desk.
He’s not always on time—extracurricular activities and all—which is something you should be used to by now. But you’re not. You still worry every time he’s not where he’s supposed to be, and you know it’s ridiculous, but you just can’t help it.
“Relax,” Jimmy says, startling you as he drops his bag onto his desk. “He’s just late, not dead.”
You shoot him a glare. You want to say you don’t know that, but you also don’t want to put that kind of energy into the universe. So you settle for sticking your tongue out like the mature, well-adjusted adult you are.
Jimmy chuckles. “Seriously, I don’t know how you two keep this up. It’s exhausting.”
You roll your eyes and turn back to your computer, not yet caffeinated enough to have this argument. Again.
“Why won’t you believe me?” he presses. “He’s into you. I know he is. Why would I lie—”
“Would you keep your voice down?” you hiss, brows pulling together. “I don’t need the entire bullpen hearing about my pathetic crush on my best friend slash coworker.”
Jimmy snorts. “But you’re fine with the entire bullpen seeing it?”
Your chair squeaks as you whip around to face him. “What do you mean, see it?”
“The way you two are constantly falling all over each other,” he says, eyebrows raised as he drops into his chair. “I mean, come on. The man brings you coffee—good coffee—twice a day, gets you snacks, picks up your mail, walks you home every night, gives you his jacket when it’s cold or rainy. And newsflash—most friends don’t hold each other by the waist in the printer room.”
Your cheeks go hot, your pulse skipping once before slamming into a frantic rhythm. The memory of Clark’s hands—big, warm, wrapped around your waist like they belonged there—flashes through your mind. The press of his fingers, the solid weight of him so close, the ghost of his breath against your neck. It’s enough to make you squirm, thighs squeezing together as you hope to hell that Jimmy doesn’t notice the way you shift in your seat.
“That’s just… Clark,” you argue. “He’s nice. He was raised well. He’s a gentleman, Jimmy. More than anyone can say about you.”
Jimmy’s brows shoot up. “Okay, I’m ignoring that insult because I know you’re just deflecting, and you know I’m right.”
“I know you’re delusional.”
“Why are you so stubborn?”
“Because,” you say, sitting up straighter, “Clark knows I have a crush on him. Okay? He knows. So if he liked me as anything more than a friend, he’d ask me out. But he doesn’t. Obviously. And I’m fine with that.”
Jimmy frowns, leaning back in his chair with his legs stretched out. “He knows?”
You nod. “He knows.”
“How do you know he knows?”
Well, that’s… complicated.
You can’t exactly say oh, because I’m pretty sure Superman can hear my heart go feral whenever he so much as looks at me. Or that he can probably see it pounding and feel the heat rushing through your veins. Or—hell—you wouldn’t even be surprised if he’s picked up on other… reactions. Like that first time you saw him in the suit up close. Or the time he came over to help you move furniture wearing just a tank top and shorts, and—okay, you need to stop thinking about that before you pass out in the middle of the newsroom.
“I just know,” you mutter. “Intuition. Or whatever.”
Jimmy groans and tips his head back like he’s talking to the ceiling. “You know, for journalists, the two of you are really bad at using your words.”
You glare at him—eyes narrowed, jaw tight—wishing you could come up with something snarky to snap back with. But you can’t. Your brain is a mess of Clark’s big hands, his broad shoulders in a tank top, and the way that goddamn suit hugs his thick thighs.
So, with a frustrated huff, you turn back to your computer and try to focus on work. You finish your first cup of the Planet’s signature sludge by the time Cat breezes in, giving you a wink and a smile before settling at her desk. Lois is next, muttering to herself as she drops into her chair and starts furiously typing whatever it is she’s afraid she’ll forget.
Your eyes flick up to Clark’s desk every few minutes, and occasionally, you make the mistake of glancing at Jimmy, who is watching you with a very amused grin. He raises his brows, smirking, like he’s daring you to admit that he’s right. You try to ignore him, but after the third look, you can’t stop yourself from scowling and mouthing at him to fuck off, when—
“You’re very late this morning,” Lois says.
Your head whips back toward Clark’s desk—eyes wide, heart thudding—and there he is.
You think you’d be used to him by now. Those bright blue eyes, the unruly curls, the dimples framing those full, stupidly pretty lips. But somehow, every time you see him—which, by the way, is a lot—you feel like you can finally breathe again. Like you’ve been holding your breath without realising it, and now that he’s here, smiling sheepishly and looking perfectly dishevelled, your lungs remember how to work.
“Yeah, I overslept,” he says, voice low and still a little rough with sleep.
Your heart stutters when his gaze lands on you, and it’s moments like this that make you wish you could control your own damn body—because how could he not know? Your entire nervous system launches into full red alert whenever he’s within fifty feet of you. And you know he can see, hear, feel everything.
“Overslept but still had time to pick up coffee?” Jimmy asks, grinning as he swivels in his chair.
Clark’s eyes flick to him, his brows drawing just slightly, but he doesn’t answer. Instead, he grabs one of the two coffees he’d set down and steps toward you, holding it out.
Your fingers brush his as you take it—just for a second—but it’s enough to make your breath hitch. His skin is warm, steady, and now yours feels like it’s buzzing. You pull back quickly, your traitorous heart hammering like it’s trying to tell on you.
“Thanks, Kent,” you mutter.
He smiles—soft and quiet, blue eyes sparkling behind his glasses—and you try not to melt. Or stare. Or do anything suspicious, like sigh wistfully and start fanning yourself with a stack of misprints.
“So,” Jimmy says, still grinning and clearly unperturbed, “excited for your date tonight?”
You take a sip of coffee—good coffee—and sigh. “Nope. Cancelled.”
“What?” Cat pops up at her desk, frowning. “Why?”
You shrug. “Apparently something came up.”
Clark raises his brows, but his eyes stay glued to his screen. “Like a prior conviction?”
You give him a flat look. “Funny.”
His gaze flicks up, lips twitching. “I’m just saying. Your taste in men is—”
“Very inconsistent,” Jimmy cuts in, smirking at you.
Your cheeks heat—you know what he’s trying to say—but you ignore him. Your eyes stay locked on Clark. “What’s wrong with a guy who sells hand-forged artisanal blades?”
“Where? From the back of his van?” Clark asks, the corner of his mouth curling. “Nothing wrong with that. Sounds very entrepreneurial.”
You narrow your eyes, running your tongue across your top teeth as you fight back a smile. Because how is it fair that he looks this goddamn cute while mocking you? While teasing you for getting dumped by some knife-collecting ex-con you met on Hinge.
“At least you’re giving Superman the night off,” Steve mutters, appearing beside your desk with a half-eaten bagel and a mug that says World’s Best Grandma.
You turn to him, brows drawn. “Okay, for the last time, I have not been saved by Superman that many times.”
“Um,” Jimmy says, “yeah you have. You’re Metropolis’ most high-maintenance citizen.”
Lois spins around in her chair. “Yeah, what are we up to now—like, five or six?”
“I thought it was five,” Steve says around a mouthful of bagel.
“Actually,” Cat pipes up, “I think it’s more than that.”
“It’s not that many!” you argue. “I counted last night—it’s only been four.”
Everyone stops, eyes flicking toward you.
There’s a beat of silence.
Lois frowns. Jimmy raises a brow. Cat giggles. And Clark looks... smug.
You blink. “What? What’s everyone looking at?”
“You counted?” Lois asks.
Clark smirks—he actually smirks. “You keep track?”
Your eyes go wide. Your whole face catches fire.
“Oh God,” Jimmy sighs. “Don’t tell me you’ve got some weird crush on Superman.”
“No,” you reply, too fast. “What? No, I—obviously not. Why would I—?”
“Oh, yeah,” he chuckles. “That’s real convincing.”
You groan and drop your face into your hands. “I do not have a crush on Superman.”
“Oh, come on,” Cat says brightly. “There’s no shame in it. The guy’s built like a Greek statue and has the jawline of a god.”
“And the thighs,” Steve adds. “Don’t forget the thighs.”
“I’ve never even looked at his thighs,” you lie, still mumbling into your palms.
There are a few snickers. Jimmy mutters something to Steve about, “Thighs? Really, man?” And then—
Clark coughs. Once. Loudly.
You swallow hard and peek through your fingers, just in time to see him lift his coffee to hide a smile.
“Wait,” Lois pipes up, her tone light but undeniably playful, “didn’t you say the other day when we were watching that live feed of him saving those puppies that you needed to go home and take a cold shower?”
Clark chokes. Your heart stops.
He coughs into his fist, turning away slightly like that’ll help disguise the pink creeping up his neck—and the ridiculous grin stretching across his lips.
Jimmy bursts out laughing. “Oh my god, that’s right. I heard that.”
“It was a joke,” you say quickly. “I was joking. And I only said it to Lois—”
Lois grins. “You also said, and I quote, ‘he could break your back and you’d say thank you’.”
Your eyes go wide. Your pulse spikes. You feel like you might faint.
And across from you, Clark is coughing harder.
“Oh no,” Cat gasps, rushing toward him. “Clark, are you okay?”
He’s hunched over now, still trying to hide his face. “I—I’m fine,” he manages. “Just... swallowed wrong.”
“Wow,” Jimmy sighs, leaning back in his chair with a wicked grin. “I guess you don’t really have a type then.”
God. If only he knew.
“It was a joke,” you say again, sharper now. “It was late, we were all mad about staying back, the breaking news started playing and I made a joke to lighten the mood, okay?”
Steve snorts. “Then why are you so defensive?”
Your eyes snap toward him. “Why are you still here?”
He holds his bagel up like a white flag and turns back to his desk.
Then Perry’s voice booms across the newsroom, calling Jimmy into his office, and the buzz of conversation quickly dies. Lois spins back to her desk, Cat returns to her phone, and the bullpen slips back into its usual rhythm—paper rustling, keys tapping, the occasional frustrated sigh from someone fighting a deadline.
With a deep breath, you sit up straighter and try to focus on your inbox. But it’s hard. Because across from you, Clark—apparently recovered from his dramatic coughing fit—is sipping his coffee like nothing happened, eyes fixed on his screen... but there’s something suspiciously smug about the set of his mouth.
When his gaze flicks up to meet yours, you lift an eyebrow. “You good?”
His lips twitch. “Didn’t realise Superman made that kind of impression on you.”
Your breath catches. There’s a spark behind his glasses, barely-there but undeniably real. A little teasing. A little warm. A little dangerous.
You clear your throat and look back to your screen. “I really was joking.”
“I know,” he says softly, but you’re not convinced he means it.
Because for the rest of the morning, his eyes keep finding you. And you can feel it. The weight of his gaze is heavy—too deliberate to ignore—and you can’t help but meet it. Every time. Even when you’re halfway across the newsroom chatting with one of the copy editors, or heading to the breakroom for your third—or fourth—cup of coffee.
By lunchtime, you feel wired. Not from caffeine or overtiredness, but from the way Clark Kent hasn’t let your heart settle all goddamn morning. And if he smirks at you one more time, you’re pretty sure you’re going to go into cardiac arrest.
“You busy?” Perry asks, startling you as he appears beside your desk.
You clear your throat and glance up at him. “Always.”
“Good. Then you’ve got time to help me.”
You want to roll your eyes, but you don’t. You haven’t been here as long as the others, but you’ve pretty much clocked Perry—and when he’s in one of these moods, it’s best not to argue.
“City Council’s pulling the same shit they tried back in ’07, and I need ammo,” he says. “Go find Mick Reynolds’ notes from the Wallace campaign exposé. Should be in the election coverage boxes—second shelf, far back. Try not to get lost in there.”
Then he’s gone, and you’re left staring blankly across at Jimmy—who is chuckling and shaking his head.
“Right,” you mutter, pushing up from your chair. “And I’m assuming he means second shelf, far back... in the archives room?”
Jimmy nods. “Yeah. Down the hall, past the printer room, last door on the right.”
“Great. Thanks.”
You tuck your phone into your pocket—just in case you do get lost—and head toward the archives room, without looking back at Clark.
You reach the end of the hall, just as Jimmy had instructed, and push open the last door on the right with a loud creak. It’s dim inside, with no windows and only half of the overhead fluorescents working—some of them flickering ominously. Metal shelving units packed with labelled boxes line the room, everything smelling faintly like dust and yellowed paper.
You take a deep breath—then immediately regret it, coughing softly as you start down the first aisle. Your eyes skim the labels on the boxes, your brain trying to decode whatever terrible filing system is in place. It’s not alphabetical, not by date, not even by section. You can’t make any sense of it—
“It’s chronological.”
You yelp, spinning around just as you reach the end of the aisle.
“Jesus Christ, farm boy,” you gasp, pressing a hand to your chest. “Why would you sneak up on someone in a creepy room like this?”
Clark chuckles quietly. “I wasn’t sneaking.”
“You didn’t knock.”
“I figured you’d hear me.”
“Well, I didn’t.”
He tilts his head, lips curling, dimples creasing. “Probably because you were muttering to yourself.”
You roll your eyes and turn back to the shelves, trying to ignore the way your pulse is still climbing. “Whatever. It’s not chronological, though. These dates don’t make—”
“Based on when the reporter started the investigation, not publication date,” he says.
Your jaw drops. “You’re kidding?”
He shakes his head, chuckling again. “Nope.”
“Oh my God,” you sigh. “Whoever decided that is evil. Why doesn’t Perry fix it?”
Clark turns toward the shelves and shrugs, his arm brushing yours—just barely—and it takes everything in you not to flinch, or lean in, or breathe weird.
“I think he secretly enjoys torturing us,” he says, glancing sideways. “Plus, who has the time to reorganise the entire archives room?”
Your traitorous eyes drop straight to his mouth, watching his tongue drag across his bottom lip. Your breath stutters. You’re not even standing that close—it’s just too quiet in here. Too dim. And he’s far too pretty to be looking at you like that.
You clear your throat. “Yeah—uh, I guess. I mean, we could volunteer Steve. Not like he does much anyway.”
Clark huffs a laugh. “Hey. Steve does an excellent job of eating other people’s lunches and leaving greasy fingerprints on things.”
“That’s true,” you say with a soft laugh. “I mean, he’s kind of a catch. Don’t you think?”
You turn and continue around the shelves into the next aisle.
Clark follows. “So, Steve is your type then?”
You give him a flat look. “Don’t.”
He presses his lips together to contain whatever smug grin is threatening to break free. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t bring up the goddamn Superman thing,” you say, turning back to the shelves in the hopes that he can’t see the colour crawling into your cheeks. “It was a joke. And Lois… ad-libbed. She made it sound way hornier than what I actually said.”
He lifts a brow, leaning his shoulder against the shelf. “What did you actually say?”
You pull out a box and blow the dust away to read whatever’s scrawled across the top. Not that you’re really paying attention. Your brain is fried—too aware of the huge man standing beside you, watching you with such intensity you feel like his stare could brand your skin.
And, well, it could—technically.
“I said that half of Metropolis is going to need a cold shower after seeing Superman save some puppies,” you lie—through your teeth. “You know, the female half—and gays. I mean, anyone who is attracted to men, really. Because Superman is a man. A big man. And he was saving puppies, so… yeah.”
You peek out the corner of your eye as you pull out another box. He’s full-on grinning now—that cheeky grin he gets when he thinks he’s said something hilarious, or knows he’s winning one of your petty arguments.
“What about the back breaking?” he asks.
You fumble the box in your hands and it falls to the floor, papers scattering everywhere.
That is not something you ever thought you’d hear Clark Kent ask you. And those words—in that voice—have completely short-circuited the connection between your brain and your motor function.
“Shit,” you mutter, dropping to your knees.
Clark crouches beside you and starts gathering the papers just out of your reach.
“I meant—” you start quickly, keeping your eyes on the scattered pages. “The back-breaking thing wasn’t, like... literal. I meant emotionally. You know, like... he could ruin me—anyone, he could ruin anyone… metaphorically.”
He pauses, then glances at you. “Metaphorically?”
“Yeah. Like, Superman, the idea of him, this gorgeous—” you hesitate, almost choking on your words, “objectively gorgeous guy who’s too good to be true. I mean, he could ruin anyone, right?”
Clark frowns. “Right.”
“Besides,” you add quickly, “I have to try and say things that make it seem like I don’t really know Superman because he’s saved me so many goddamn times.”
He chuckles quietly. “That’s just because you’re near him all the time, and he has to get you to safety before all hell breaks loose.”
“Okay,” you mutter, stacking the pages with unnecessary focus, “but you don’t need to mention it in every article you write.”
He shrugs, handing you the papers he’d collected. “Superman likes talking about the people he’s saved.”
“Clark,” you sigh, reaching for the stack of pages.
Your hand brushes his, and your breath catches. You both freeze.
You swear you feel a pulse of heat where your fingers touch—and you know it’s ridiculous, but it doesn’t stop your heart from thudding, or your skin from flushing. He doesn’t move. Doesn’t speak.
And then—
“Hey guys,” Jimmy’s voice cuts through the tension. “I hate to break up whatever’s going on in here, but Perry’s about ready to rip heads off if he doesn’t have those notes soon.”
You jump up so fast you nearly knock another box off the shelf. “Shit, I—um—”
“Mick Reynolds’ notes from the Wallace campaign, right?” Clark asks, his eyes scanning the room.
You know what he’s doing, and it’s at times like this that you’re incredibly grateful for his superhuman abilities.
You nod. “Yep. Perry said they should be in the election coverage boxes—second shelf, far back.”
He steps away, walking along the back of the room before disappearing down a far aisle.
Jimmy grins and wriggles his eyebrows like an idiot. “The archives room, huh? Pretty cozy in here. Tall stacks to hide in.”
“Shut up,” you mutter, shoving the box you dropped back onto the shelf.
Clark returns a few seconds later, holding up a file. “Reynolds’ notes, ’07.”
“I don’t know how you do it, man,” Jimmy says, shaking his head. “No one can find anything in here except this guy.”
Clark just smiles, and you roll your eyes. Jimmy takes the file, shoots you a cheeky wink—as if he has any clue about what’s going on—and heads back out the door.
You turn to Clark, brows raised, lips twitching. “How do you do it, Clark? How do you find things in this terribly organised filing system?”
The corner of his mouth quirks. “Dumb luck?”
“Hm,” you narrow your eyes playfully. “I think you’ve got a secret, Kent.”
You can almost swear you see him blush, but the room is too dark to tell—and you have to look away from his stupidly gorgeous face before you forget how to act like a normal human being.
He doesn’t reply, he just follows you out of the archives room—flicking off the barely-working lights on the way—and up the hall toward the newsroom. You’re just passing the printer room, trying very hard not to think about the way his hands had felt on your waist, when he finally speaks.
“I was thinking,” he says, “movie night tonight, at my place? You know, since your date bailed.”
You glance over your shoulder at him. “Sure you don’t have better things to do on a Friday night?”
“Nah,” he replies with that small smirk—the one that makes your heart stutter. “Metropolis’ most high-maintenance citizen is giving me the night off.”
You roll your eyes. “Okay, for that comment, you’re paying for takeout.”
He chuckles. “I always pay for takeout.”
“Yeah?” You stop just outside the breakroom door. “Well, I’m ordering extra this time.”
“Extra food that I’ll end up eating because you always order too much,” he teases. “Of course. It’s tradition.”
You shake your head, biting the inside of your cheek to keep from grinning. “Whatever. I’m still ordering it.”
And then—before he can see just how much he’s affecting you—you slip into the breakroom and let the door fall shut behind you.
You turn, grip the edge of the counter, and exhale like you’ve been holding your breath for ten straight minutes. Because what the fuck is going on? His voice, his smile, his face, his everything—he’s not even trying, and you’re already halfway to a heart attack.
You’ve known Clark for years—you’ve been best friends for years. And yeah, he’s always had… an effect on you. But this? This is something else entirely. Being around him this much is starting to feel dangerous. Like the longer you stay in his orbit, the closer you are to coming undone. Every glance that lingers. Every touch that means too much. Every smile that knocks the air clean out of your lungs. You keep pretending it’s fine—but something has shifted. And whatever it is, it’s getting harder to ignore.
Jimmy’s words echo in your head, and for one traitorous second, you almost believe them. Almost believe that there might be something real behind the way Clark looks at you.
But no. Surely not, right? That’s not how this works. He’s Superman. He saves cities before breakfast. He could have any woman he wanted.
And you? You’re just the friend. The one who gets takeout with him on Friday nights because he feels bad that your date bailed. The one he teases in the bullpen. The one trying not to fall apart every time he gets too close.
You press your palms harder into the counter, as if you can steady yourself with pressure alone. But your heart’s still racing, and your lungs won’t quite fill.
You cannot keep doing this. Not like this.
Because one of these days, you’re going to look at him and forget how to pretend.
-
You never thought you’d be happy about a hectic Friday afternoon, but today, the distractions are doing a better job than your self-control ever could.
Perry is hell-bent on nailing this latest City Council scandal, and he’s got the entire bullpen scrambling to publish before the end of the day. Cat is helping Jimmy track down incriminating photos, sift through old campaign trail shots, and monitor social media for real-time fallout. Clark’s stuck on the phone with whistleblowers and trying to pin down a statement from any councilmember who’ll take his call. Steve’s out on the street gathering public reaction—loudly complaining the whole time that his Knicks column is getting bumped. And you’re at Lois’s side, helping her fact-check quotes and comb through timelines while she tears through the main exposé like a woman possessed.
It’s chaos—in the best way. Because everyone here does their best work under pressure, with ten empty coffee cups on their desk. And the best part? You’re too busy to risk another lingering moment with Clark. Too distracted to spiral. Too occupied to feel anything.
It’s perfect.
Right up until five p.m., when Perry signs off, Lois hits publish, and everyone starts packing up for the weekend.
“Coming straight over, or are you going home first?” Clark asks, shrugging into his jacket.
From the corner of your eye, you see Jimmy’s head snap toward you—and your cheeks heat immediately.
“I’ll head home first,” you say, trying to keep your voice quiet. “Change into something comfortable before I come over.”
It’s no use though—Jimmy hears everything.
“You know I’ve got a whole drawer of your clothes at my place, right?” Clark says, blue eyes flicking—just briefly—toward Jimmy, who is inching closer on the wheels of his chair.
You let out a small, nervous laugh. “It’s not a whole drawer. Is it?”
“Oh, it is,” Clark replies. “Though I think half of it’s just my old college stuff. Pretty sure you stole more than Ma ever got the chance to donate.”
Jimmy gasps—he actually gasps—like a dramatic little asshole watching his favourite soap opera play out live.
Both you and Clark turn toward him. He’s still sitting in his chair, halfway between his desk and yours, glancing between the two of you with wide eyes. You’re scowling. Clark just looks mildly sceptical.
Then, after a beat, Clark shakes his head and turns back to you. “Anyway. You want me to walk you home?”
“No,” you say—way too fast. “I mean, I’m good. I’ll catch a cab.”
He nods. “Okay. Let me know when you’re on your way?”
“Okay,” you echo, giving him a tight smile.
He tucks his chair under his desk, gives Jimmy a polite—but vaguely curious—goodbye as he steps around him, and walks off through the newsroom toward the elevator. You watch after him until the doors slide shut and the numbers above begin to light up as the lift descends.
Then you turn back to Jimmy, who has now scooted right up to your desk. Arms crossed. Eyes narrowed like a man who’s just connected the final thread on a conspiracy board.
“You’re pranking me,” he says flatly.
You close your eyes, breathing deeply. “Jimmy, just… don’t.”
“You have a drawer. Of clothes. At his apartment.”
You open your mouth, but he holds up a hand.
“No—no. Don’t talk. I need to process. I’m having, like, a full-on event.”
You frown. “An event?”
“You wear his clothes!” he hisses, loud enough to make your pulse spike. “You hang out at his place constantly. You’re going over tonight, after your date bailed—on a Friday—and you just casually told him you were gonna ‘change into something comfortable’ like that’s not the sexiest sentence ever uttered in this newsroom!”
Your face burns even hotter. “It’s not—I didn’t mean it like—”
He gasps again—loudly. “Do you have a drawer of his clothes at your place? If you say yes, I’m pitching Cat a column on office romance and you two are going to be my lead sources.”
“Well—I mean, yes, but—”
“Oh my God. You’re basically a couple without the sex!”
You scowl. “Jimmy—”
“I’m just saying!” He throws his hands up, wheeling backward like he needs a full-body reset. “You’re over there more than his landlord. You do Friday night takeout. You have drawer rights. He gives you heart-eyes every time you speak. And you’re both still pretending this is all just… platonic?”
You stare at him, mouth dry.
“Please,” Jimmy says, softer now, scooting forward again and leaning his forearms on your desk. “Don’t make me live through an unnecessary slow burn. I’m too young to suffer like this. Just jump him.”
You groan and cover your face with both hands. “Oh my God.”
“You don’t even deny that you want to,” he says, grinning now. “You’re just too scared to actually do it.”
You peek at him through your fingers. “Can you please shut up?”
“Nope,” he says brightly. “I’m way too invested now. I’m not going to shut up until I have proof that you two have finally boned.”
You drop your hands from your face with a sigh and push back from your desk. “Okay,” you mutter. “I’m leaving now.”
Jimmy just watches you—arms crossed, smug as hell, like he knows something you don’t. You pull your jacket on, pack your bag, and sling it over your shoulder.
“Just do yourself a favour,” he says. “Stop pretending this isn’t exactly what it looks like.”
You give him a look. “Jimmy—”
“Trust me,” he says, rolling back toward his desk. “You don’t end up with a drawer at someone’s place and standing Friday night plans by accident.”
You roll your eyes. “It’s not like that.”
“Sure it’s not,” he chuckles.
You huff and hitch your bag higher. “I’m leaving now.”
He turns to face his screen, still grinning. “Have fun, and don’t be shy. You might be… surprised.”
You stand frozen for a second—heart pounding, thoughts tripping over themselves—then spin on your heel and walk away before you can say something you’ll regret. Before Jimmy’s cryptic nonsense makes your brain explode.
He’s just messing with you, obviously—he’s teasing, making things up. Because there’s no way a drawer and some clothes and a Friday night movie night means anything more than friendship.
Right?
It’s just takeout. Just TV. Just Clark.
You jab the elevator button harder than necessary, tapping your foot impatiently while you wait for the doors to open. The second they do, you slip inside and start digging through your bag for your headphones. You need distraction—a podcast, an audiobook, something. Anything to stop thinking about Clark fucking Kent before you’re sitting beside him on the couch.
A breath apart. Bodies warm. Pulse thrumming.
God. You are so monumentally screwed.
As soon as you get home, you head straight for the shower, hoping the hot water might help rinse away all your spiralling thoughts. You take your time washing your hair—twice—and exfoliating everything before simply standing under the spray, trying to remember how to breathe. How to be human. How to stop over-analysing every little thing Clark has ever done for you.
Curse Jimmy Olsen and his stupidly smug words and overly supportive encouragements.
By the time you step out, you smell like coconut, vanilla, and just a hint of panic. You quickly dry off before picking out a soft pair of sweats and your favourite movie night hoodie. Then you open your underwear drawer—and pause.
You stare at the unorganised mess of cotton and lace for almost two full minutes.
It’d be ridiculous to put on something cute. Right? This is just movie night. With Clark. The same Clark who’s seen you eat popcorn off your hoodie while ugly crying over Marley & Me. There is absolutely no reason to wear something small or uncomfortable or even remotely pretty.
Tonight isn’t special. Nothing is going to happen.
But then Jimmy’s stupid voice echoes through your head, making everything feel a little less certain.
“Ugh. Fine,” you mutter, grabbing a pair that could generously be described as a little nicer than usual.
They’re not scandalous—or over the top—just better than the ones you wouldn’t want found on your body if you got hit by a bus. Which, honestly, is a pretty low bar, but whatever.
After getting dressed, you quickly pack your bag—keys, wallet, snacks—and slip on the first pair of shoes you can find before heading out the door.
You’re halfway across the lobby when your phone buzzes with a text—from Clark:
Something came up. Spare key is under the mat. Won’t be late.
Before you can question it, a breaking news alert flashes across your screen:
BREAKING: Robot Attack in Downtown Metropolis
Authorities are responding to a violent incident involving an unidentified mechanical threat near the 6th & Hadley tech district. Witnesses report strange gas emissions and widespread damage. Superman has been spotted at the scene. Officials urge residents to avoid the area until further notice. More to come.
You quickly hail a cab, fall into the backseat, and bring up the live feed of the attack downtown. There’s not much to see from the helicopter camera—just the blur of scattered civilians, crumbling storefronts, and a distant flash of red and blue cutting through the smoke.
Your chest tightens. Your heart starts pounding harder. You know he’s Superman, and he literally does this kind of thing at least twice a week—but still, every single time, you worry.
What if this is the one time things go wrong?
What if this is the time he doesn’t get back up?
What if you lose him before you ever get the chance to tell him how you feel?
Thankfully, you don’t live far from Clark, and it isn’t long before the cab pulls up just outside his apartment building. You pay the driver, slip out, and hitch your bag higher on your shoulder as you approach the front door.
You’re here so often that the lobby staff don’t even bat an eye as you walk past. You slip into the elevator, ride it up, and walk the hallway like you know this building better than your own. Then you stop at his door, lift the welcome mat, and spot the little silver key that had been tucked beneath it.
Of course Clark Kent is naive enough to leave a key under the mat—like that’s not the first place a burglar would look. He’s lucky he doesn’t live in Gotham. You know for a fact he’d have been robbed at least once by now—probably more.
You step inside and try not to breathe in too deeply like a total creep, but it’s hard not to when the whole place smells like him—familiar and clean, with the faint, crisp edge of cold air from his frequent trips to the Antarctic.
You kick your shoes off, drop your bag on the kitchen counter, and head into the lounge room to flick on the TV. You settle on the couch and flip through channels until live news coverage of the attack pops up.
“We’re receiving confirmation that the area has now been cleared of civilians, and that Superman has successfully neutralised the mechanical threat responsible for tonight's attack,” the female news anchor reports.
You let out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding.
“Authorities remain on the scene, working to identify the strange gas released during the incident. While it appears to be non-lethal, several sources—including a spokesperson from the fire department—have confirmed that individuals exposed to the gas are experiencing some unusual side effects.”
You lean forward, the curious journalist in you coming to life.
“In what can only be described as one of the stranger developments this year, witnesses and responders alike seem to be... unable to lie. More than that, they’re being compelled to speak—blurt out personal details, opinions, even long-held secrets.”
You frown. “Like... a truth serum?”
“We now go live to Darren McMillan, reporting live from the scene. Darren—what more can you tell us?”
The feed cuts to a man in a plain surgical mask—which you doubt is doing anything—standing outside a half-burnt bakery.
“Thanks, Elsie. I’m just outside the perimeter, where hazmat teams and emergency services are still assessing the area. The good news is, no major injuries have been reported. And while the gas remains unidentified, officials say there’s currently no evidence of toxicity or long-term danger.”
The camera pans out slightly.
“That said, the psychological effects are harder to pin down. One first responder told me he hasn’t been able to stop talking about his childhood hamster for twenty straight minutes. Another admitted—without prompting—that he once embezzled over four thousand dollars from his mother-in-law. And personally, I—uh—”
The reporter freezes, eyes wide as he makes uncomfortably direct eye contact with the camera.
“—I think I might be in love with my barista. Also, I’ve been cheating on my girlfriend with someone from accounting.”
There's a split-second of stunned silence, then the camera wobbles—and the feed cuts back to the studio.
“We... seem to have lost Darren for the moment,” the anchor says awkwardly. “We’ll continue following this story as it develops. In the meantime, residents are advised to avoid the area until the all-clear has been given.”
You snort a laugh as you push off the couch and wander back into the kitchen. You reach for a wine glass from one of the higher cupboards, then spot a bottle of red sitting by the stove—Clark might be immune to alcohol, but he always keeps a bottle around just for you.
You crack the lid and start to pour—only to somehow misjudge the angle and splash red wine all over your hoodie and down the front of your sweats.
“Shit,” you mutter, quickly setting the bottle back down on the bench.
With a sigh, you peel off your hoodie and make your way toward Clark’s bedroom, ignoring the way your heart does that annoying little flutter when you step inside—even though you’ve been in here a hundred times before.
You go straight to the second-top drawer of his dresser, where he keeps the clothes you usually wear, and grab a pair of old sleep shorts and a threadbare Metropolis University shirt—both clearly his. He wasn’t kidding when he said you’d stolen most of his college wardrobe.
You change quickly and throw your wine-stained clothes into the hamper by the door on your way out. You know he won’t mind. He never does. Then back in the kitchen, you mop up the spilt wine before pouring yourself a generous glass and leaning back against the counter to scroll through your phone.
You’re mid-sip when you hear the soft thud of feet on the balcony.
You glance up, heart hammering, and see Clark step inside. His face and suit are streaked with ash, hair wind-tousled, eyes dark and unreadable. He’s looked better, but he’s definitely looked worse—and for the first time since that breaking news alert popped up on your phone, you feel like you can breathe again.
“Clark,” you say, stepping forward. “Are you—”
“Wait,” he says—not loud, but firm.
You freeze.
He takes a breath, jaw tense. “You shouldn’t be here.”
You blink. “What? But you told me to—”
“I mean,” he says quickly, “it’s not that I don’t want you—” He cuts himself off, mouth twitching like the words are fighting their way out. “It’s... not advisable.”
“Clark,” you say slowly, “are you okay?”
He nods—then immediately shakes his head.
“Are you hurt?” you ask, setting your wine down on the counter.
“No,” he replies. “But the gas—the stuff from the attack—it has... some kind of neurological effect. I don’t know how long it’ll last.”
Your brows lift. “Wait... it affected you too? But you’re—”
“I know,” he says with a small, strained smile. “I’m trying to fight it.”
“Oh. So,” you step forward, lips twitching, “you’re telling me you can’t lie right now?”
He nods again. “Yes, but it—it’s more than that. I—” His voice catches, his hands curling into fists at his sides. “I want to say things. I want to just blurt everything out.”
Any trace of amusement falls from your face, and your eyes go wide. “Oh, shit. Like—you feel like you’re just going to fly out there and tell the world that Clark Kent is Superman?”
He huffs a soft laugh. “Not exactly what I’m worried about—”
“Wait,” you cut him off. “Okay, first, we need to lock the doors. I know you’re you, so it doesn’t make much of a difference, but I’ll still feel better if they’re locked, okay?”
You don’t wait for him to reply—you just start moving through the apartment, slamming shut every window, locking the balcony door, then the front door, and double-checking each one. Twice.
When you return, he’s still standing exactly where you left him—caught between the lounge room and the kitchen, jaw tight, shoulders stiff.
“I swear I’m going to do everything I can to help you,” you say, your hands starting to tremble. “I know I can’t actually stop you from flying through the window, but—I’ll try.”
He lets out another soft laugh, low and a little tense. “I’m not going to—”
“How do we get this out of your system?” you ask, stepping in close and crossing your arms over your chest.
Clark opens his mouth—then hesitates. His eyes flick down, and his brow furrows, like he’s only just noticed what you’re wearing.
“That’s—um. That’s my shirt.”
You glance down. “Oh. Yeah. I spilled wine on mine.”
He nods, slowly, jaw clenched like he’s physically holding back the rest of the words—but then his eyes drop lower, and his voice slips out before he can stop it. “You look good in my clothes.”
Your heart stutters. “What?”
He visibly winces, because he definitely hadn’t meant to say that out loud. “I mean—you always wear my stuff, I know that, I just—” He stops and takes a deep breath. “Forget I said anything.”
You take a step back, flustered, hoping he’s too distracted to notice the heat creeping up your neck. “Okay. Um. What do you need? Should you eat something? Try to sweat it out? Or—I don’t know, take a cold shower?”
He doesn’t answer. He just keeps standing there, stiff and quiet, like if he says even one word, the rest might follow whether he wants them to or not.
Your arms fall to your sides as you let out a soft, breathless laugh. “Well... at least we don’t have any secrets.”
Clark huffs—one breath, sharp and low. “Just one,” he mutters.
You blink. “What?”
But he’s already turning away, scrubbing a hand down his face. “I’m gonna take that shower.”
And then he disappears into his room without another word, leaving you dazed, confused, and—yeah—a little horny after seeing him in that goddamn suit.
As soon as you hear the shower start running, you turn and scull the rest of your wine—wincing as it burns your throat. You set the glass back down on the counter with a soft clink, then brace your palms against the cool marble and draw a few deep breaths, trying to stop your thoughts from spiralling.
Just one.
Just... one?
What does that even mean? What kind of secret? Something big? Something small? Something life-ruining? Oh God—what if it’s something serious? What if he’s dying? Or secretly married? Or, like, used to be evil?
You groan and drop your forehead to the counter.
No. You need to stop. This is ridiculous.
It’s normal to have secrets. Everyone has things they keep to themselves. That doesn’t make it shady—or bad—or dangerous. It’s probably just something awkward. Or embarrassing. Or, knowing Clark, so deeply uncool that it makes him cringe to even think about it.
Yeah, that’s it. That’s definitely it.
He’s not dying or secretly married or evil—he’s just Clark.
And he doesn’t owe you everything. He doesn’t even owe you anything.
You’re lucky to have as much of him as you do. You don’t need to know every little thing. Besides—he’s got a secret. So do you. And despite Jimmy’s encouragement, you’re pretty damn sure you’re never going to tell him.
Okay. You need to stop freaking out.
You need to focus on helping Clark through whatever this is before he accidentally tells all of Metropolis that he’s Superman. You need to find a way to flush this toxin—or whatever it is—out of his system.
And if you can’t do that?
Then you need to distract him until it wears off.
By the time Clark’s bedroom door cracks open, you’re back on the couch. The news is still playing, volume low now. The anchor is saying something about clean-up efforts and eyewitness accounts—but you’re not listening. You can’t. Not when Clark Kent is walking toward you in a pair of low-slung dark blue sweats while he’s halfway to pulling a shirt over his head.
It’s not like you’ve never seen him shirtless before—you have, occasionally. When you went to the beach together. During that horrible June heatwave. That time he spilled hot soup on himself.
But still. Seeing him like this, fresh from the shower, curls damp and clinging to his forehead—it hits different. It makes your breath hitch, your skin flush, and that spot behind your hipbones ache.
“Hey,” you say quietly. “Feeling better?”
“I feel cleaner,” he mutters, dropping onto the opposite end of the couch—as far from you as it’ll allow.
You swallow hard and shift a little, turning more toward him than the TV.
“Okay,” you start, “first—I just want to say, I totally respect you having secrets. It’s normal. I mean, Lois and Jimmy are always joking that we’re too close, but we still have things we keep to ourselves. Not full-on secrets, but—like—it’d be weird if we knew every single thing about each other, right? No—wait, that’s not a question.” You let out an awkward laugh. “I swear I’m going to respect your privacy. I’m not going to ask any questions you don’t want to answer. And I’m sorry—I know I’m rambling. But—” you take a breath “—I was thinking, if you can’t just sweat it out or whatever, then we need to keep you distracted. Stop you from flying out there and announcing your secret identity to half the city. So… what if we just talk? Anything. Everything. No secrets. Just... stuff I might not know. Like—I don’t know—when did you first figure out you could fly?”
Clark just stares at you for a moment—unblinking, brows raised, the slightest twitch pulling at the corner of his lips. He looks a little less wrecked than he did earlier, a little amused, and there’s something else in his eyes you can’t quite place. A look you only catch sometimes—fleeting, private—one he’s usually quick to hide.
But not tonight.
“Uh,” he says eventually, voice a little hoarse. “Okay. Flying was… weird. At first.”
You tilt your head. “So, you just—what? Floated off the ground one day?”
“Pretty much,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I was in high school. Fourteen, maybe fifteen. Hard to say—everything was happening at once.”
You snort softly. “Puberty was a little rougher on you, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah,” he chuckles. “It was.”
“Do you know what triggered it?”
“The microwave,” he mutters.
Your brows rise. “The microwave?”
“It kept burning my popcorn.” His expression turns sheepish. “I yelled at it and then, next thing I knew, I was on the ceiling. Ma screamed so loud I thought I’d broken something. Which—I did. I crashed into the dining room light trying to get down.”
You bite your lip to hide your grin. “That’s actually adorable.”
He shrugs, gaze dropping to the floor. “I’m pretty sure I cried. I, uh… cried a lot back then.”
Your throat tightens and that soft ache in your chest sharpens. “Clark.”
“No, really. I was a very emotional child. Also, kind of flammable,” he says with a tight smile. “The heat vision was a nightmare. Powers come first, control comes later.”
“Oh my God.”
“There’s a reason I was homeschooled for two years.” He pauses, his smile softening. “Well. That, and I had a crush on my tenth-grade teacher and Ma said I was dangerously distracted.”
You laugh again—quietly—and drop your eyes to your lap, hoping Clark doesn’t notice the way your body flushes with heat. Because seriously, who gets jealous of their best friend admitting he had a crush on his teacher over a decade ago?
“Okay,” you say, eyes flicking back up. “This is good. Is it working?”
“Yeah,” he says. “A little.”
“Good. Next question, then.”
He lets out a low, quiet laugh and leans back, eyes fluttering closed for a second. “Alright. Hit me.”
You clear your throat, shifting to face him more fully. “What do you think about when you’re flying? Just flying—not in the middle of a fight or racing back to your fortress to heal. Just... in the air.”
He opens his mouth. Pauses. Closes it. Opens it again. His expression twists, jaw tightening like he’s trying to hold it in—like whatever he’s trying not to say is fighting its way out.
You open your mouth to tell him he doesn’t have to answer when—
“You,” he says, voice strained.
You blink. “What?”
“And—and my parents,” he adds quickly. “When I can see Kansas. I think about work, too. A lot of things. But I think about you a—” He cuts himself off, hands curling into fists in his lap, brows furrowing. “I think about you a lot.”
Your breath catches. The room feels suddenly very, very still. Your pulse is loud in your ears—too loud—drowning out the sound of the TV and your own uneven breathing.
He thinks about you. A lot.
What does that even mean—and what the hell are you supposed to do with it?
“Ask me another question,” he says abruptly, almost desperate. “Please.”
You blink at him. “What?”
“Just—change the subject. Anything else.”
You panic. Your thoughts scatter. Your mouth opens, closes—opens again, and then—God help you—you blurt out the first thing that hits your tongue.
“Are you a virgin?”
Clark makes a sound halfway between a cough and a gasp. “What?”
“I don’t know!” you exclaim, throwing your hands up. “I panicked! And—and I’m just curious because... you’re Clark. I mean, you’re so kind, and sweet, and polite—and you’ve never even had a real girlfriend the whole time we’ve been friends, so I just—”
“Yeah,” he mutters, tone dry. “Funny, that.”
You frown, heat creeping up your neck. You want to ask what the hell he means by that—but you know you can't. Not right now.
“I wasn’t trying to be rude,” you say instead, softer now. “I’m sorry. It’s just—it’s a thought I’ve had for a while, and it sort of just... slipped out.”
“No,” he says, voice steady. “I’m not a virgin.”
You nod, lips parting like you might say something—maybe to apologise again, maybe to change the subject—but nothing comes out. Your brain short-circuits. You feel warm all over. Too warm.
Clark clears his throat. “Still trying to distract me?”
“Yeah—” you reply, blinking fast. “Yes. Of course.”
He gives you a lopsided smile—shy, but trying. “Then ask another question.”
You hesitate, voice catching as your conscience flares to life. He seems almost normal now—still a little flushed, a little off—but mostly back to himself. Maybe his metabolism is quickly burning off the effects of the gas. Maybe he’s not feeling so compelled anymore.
Maybe you should take advantage of this while you still can.
No secrets. Just one question. The one that’s been burning a hole in your chest for years.
“Okay,” you say quietly. “Have you ever been in love?”
The second the words leave your mouth, you want to take them back. Clark stiffens—not in a sharp, startled way, but more like someone trying to hold back a shiver.
“Yes,” he says, immediately—because he couldn’t stop himself if he tried.
Your mouth goes dry. You want to ask who, but you’re not sure you could survive the answer.
“What about you?” he asks.
Your breath catches. “Me?”
He nods.
“I—I’m not the one in the hot seat right now, I—”
“Is it Jimmy?”
Your eyes go wide. “What?”
“Are you in love with Jimmy?” he presses, brows pulling tight.
You just stare at him, stunned, voice caught somewhere in your chest as your brain struggles to catch up.
“It’s fine,” he says, gaze dropping to his lap. “I get it. You spend a lot of time with him. You’re always talking about him. He makes you laugh. Your pulse goes crazy whenever—”
“Clark,” you cut in, sharper than you mean to be. “I’m not—what? No. I’m not in love with Jimmy.”
Clark blinks at your denial like he doesn’t quite believe you. Like maybe he wants to—but can’t.
“Wait,” you say suddenly, narrowing your eyes. “You said—my pulse. You listen to my pulse?”
He tilts his head. “I can’t really help—”
You frown. “I know you can hear it, Clark, but I’m asking if you actively listen to it.”
“Yes,” he mutters—even though it’s obvious he didn’t want to say it.
Your cheeks burn. “How often?”
“I don’t know.” He shifts awkwardly in his seat. “Some—most of the time.”
You blink. “What? So you just... tune in? Like I’m a podcast or something?”
He groans, dragging a hand over his face. “Please stop.”
“No,” you fire back. “I’m not stopping. Because you just accused me of being in love with Jimmy fucking Olsen. And then you admitted you listen to my pulse like it’s your own personal metronome. And before—” You stop, heart pounding so hard it feels like it might crack a rib. “Before, you told me I looked good in your clothes. Clark, I’ve been wearing your clothes since college, and you’ve never said that to me.”
He meets your stare—eyes wild, jaw tight, brows drawn. He looks like he’s on the verge of saying something he’s not sure he’s allowed to say. And maybe that’s exactly what you need him to do.
“I know we’ve always been close, but—but working together—” Your voice shakes. “It’s different now. We’re too close. Something’s shifted, and I don’t know what. Yesterday in the printer room. Today in the archives. You’re acting weird. I’m acting weird. Everything is weird. And now, somehow, you think I’m in love with Jimmy?”
“Your heart beats like crazy whenever he’s around,” he says, the words falling out fast, like he’s been holding them in for too long. “You—your whole body flushes. Your hands start trembling. I can see it, hear it, feel every reaction you have when he’s around and it—it—” He cuts himself off, raking a hand through his still-damp curls.
You watch him for a beat—heart racing, skin burning. The silence stretches between you, taut and heavy. It feels like the same tension that clung to the air in the printer room. And in the archives. Palpable. Suffocating.
“Jimmy?” you say softly. “Whenever I’m around... Jimmy?”
He nods, stiff and careful. Like opening his mouth might let too much out again.
You take a deep breath, shifting a little closer on the couch. “Then tell me, Clark…” Your voice drops, quieter now. “What am I feeling right now?”
His eyes flit over your face, searching. You watch him track your expression, the set of your mouth, the line of your shoulders. Like he’s trying to solve you. Like he already knows—but doesn’t understand.
“You’re... flushed,” he says first, voice low. “Your skin’s hot. Your pupils are huge. You’re... you’re breathing hard.”
He swallows, brow furrowing in concentration.
“You shifted closer, too. You do that when you’re comfortable, or—or trying to be comforting, but—” His gaze flickers downward. “Your hands are shaking.”
You don’t answer. You just watch him. Let him keep going.
“I can hear your pulse in your throat,” he says, eyes there now. “It jumped the second I started talking. And it hasn’t slowed down. Not even now.”
He shifts, clearly flustered, and you swear his gaze flicks to your mouth before he catches himself and looks away—back to your lap, your hands, your shoulders. Anywhere but your eyes.
“I—I don’t know what you’re feeling,” he says finally, and he sounds so lost—so completely confused—you almost feel bad. “I know what your body’s doing, but I don’t know what it means.”
You blink at him. “You really don’t?”
He exhales, voice dropping low. “I don’t want to get it wrong.”
That’s it. That’s all it takes for your last thread of patience to snap. Your pulse is a drumbeat in your ears—your whole body humming, trembling—and still, he just sits there blinking at you like he’s never once considered the most obvious thing in the world.
“God,” you mutter, pushing to your feet with a frustrated huff. “Clark—it’s you. It’s not Jimmy, it’s not even Superman. It’s you. I react like this around you.”
His eyes widen—just slightly. He blinks up at you—once, twice—like his brain is buffering, trying to reboot.
You let out a breathless, incredulous laugh. “I cannot believe after all these years, you’ve only just figured it out. And you thought it was because of Jimmy?” You tip your head back, squeezing your eyes shut to keep the emotion from spilling over. “I thought you fucking knew.”
“You thought I knew?” he asks, his voice low, rough—a little wrecked.
You look at him again, expression tight. “Yes, Clark. I thought you knew. I thought it was obvious—because every time you look at me, my heart races and my whole body gets hot and—Jesus Christ. It doesn’t even matter, okay? You’re you, and I’m me, and none of this makes sense, so just forget it.”
You move past him—but his hand catches yours before you can get too far. It’s gentle, but there’s tension in it.
You freeze.
“Wait,” he breathes. “Please.”
You take a breath—but before you can fully turn around, he tugs. Hard.
Suddenly you’re off balance—caught, pulled, guided down into his lap like gravity made the decision for you. Your knees hit the couch on either side of his thighs, your hands braced against his chest, and the space between you disappears.
Your breath catches. His does too.
You’re so close you can feel the shape of his next exhale against your lips. His hands hover at your waist like he’s not sure he’s allowed to hold you.
“I’m not lying,” he says quietly, eyes locked on yours like you’re the only thing that matters. “I mean—I can’t. I just… I never thought you could feel that way about me. Never even considered it. Not after all these years. Not until thirty seconds ago when you told me—because I’m an idiot.”
For a moment, he just stares at you—like he can’t quite believe that you’re real. That you’re here, straddling his lap, flushed and breathless and saying all the things he never let himself hope to hear.
And then—
He grins.
Not the awkward, bashful one you’ve seen a hundred times before. Not the polite press of lips he gives strangers on the street or the sheepish half-smile he shoots you across the bullpen when you catch him watching you.
This one is brighter. Slower. Wider. It blooms across his face like a sunrise—like he’s seeing you clearly for the first time and can’t quite handle it. His eyes crinkle at the corners, blue as heaven, and the dimples in cheeks deepen in a way that makes your stomach flip. It’s the kind of smile that punches you in the gut. The kind that says you are everything.
It steals the breath from your lungs.
You don’t even realise you’re leaning in until his hands finally cradle your waist—steady, warm, reverent.
“Can I—?” he murmurs, voice barely above a whisper.
But you’re already nodding. Already closing the gap.
And then he kisses you.
It starts soft—tentative, like he’s afraid he’ll break you. But it only takes a second for instinct to take over. His hands slide down to your hips, pulling you in closer, tighter. His mouth moves with yours like he’s learning, adjusting, finding his confidence with every brush of lips, every quiet breath shared between you.
You feel him exhale through his nose—shaky, relieved—like he’s never been this close to peace before. Then his hands glide up your sides and back down again, broad and warm and possessive. The kiss deepens. The tension that’s been wound tight between you for years finally begins to unravel.
His tongue flicks against your bottom lip, and you open for him without hesitation. A soft moan breaks from you—and a ragged one answers from him. He kisses you harder, needier. His fingers flex at your hips, anchoring you, dragging you impossibly closer.
“I used to dream about this,” he breathes against your mouth. “Every night. You. This. Just… you.”
You whimper—actually whimper—and grind down against him before you can stop yourself, chasing the pressure, his voice, his hands, him.
He groans—loud and helpless—his grip tightening until you gasp.
He pulls back, just barely, his lips parted and kiss-bruised. His eyes scan yours like he’s checking for damage, guilt flooding in.
“I’m sorry,” he says hoarsely, breath hot against your cheek. “I didn’t mean to—”
“Clark.” You cup his jaw. “Tell me what you want.”
He stills beneath you, swallowing hard.
Your voice drops. “The truth. Say it.”
His breath catches—your thighs tight around him, your chest rising and falling against his. His fingers dig in again.
“I want…” His voice cracks. “I want you to stay right here. I want to kiss you. I want to feel you—all of you. I want you to keep grinding on me just like—”
You do—grinding down, slow and precise.
He groans—chokes on it—his head tipping back, eyes fluttering shut. “Gosh.”
You lean in, lips brushing the line of his jaw. “What else?”
“I want to touch you,” he breathes, helpless. “I want to hear all the sounds you make. I want—”
You press your hips down again.
“Please,” he whispers.
“Tell me.”
He looks at you—eyes blown wide, voice nothing but want. “I want to fuck you.”
You gasp, your mouth falling open in stunned silence.
Clark Kent just said a bad word.
Your brain stalls. It short-circuits. You blink down at him, lips parted, heartbeat pounding somewhere in your throat. In all your years of friendship, you’ve never heard him swear. You’ve barely heard him curse—maybe the odd Jesus Christ or damn it—but a full-on fuck just fell from those perfect, full lips.
“Did you just say… fuck?”
His cheeks turn pink—he actually blushes—and he ducks his head with a low groan, hiding his face against your neck like he might disappear into your skin. You feel the grin spreading slowly across your throat before his lips press there—soft and reverent, trailing heat as he speaks again.
“I—” He lets out a breathless, choked laugh. “I can’t lie right now. It’s not fair.”
You bite back a grin, drunk on the heat of him. “Are you accusing me of taking advantage of you, Kent?”
His mouth finds your neck again—slow and sure, like a secret—and he hums against your skin. “You’re absolutely taking advantage.”
You laugh—quiet and shaky—and curl your fingers into his hair, gently tugging until he looks up at you again. His eyes are blown wide, dark with need, but still soft around the edges—Clark, always Clark.
And you love him for it.
You want him for it.
You need him.
“Come on, then,” you murmur, brushing your thumb along his cheek. “Show me what you’ve been holding back, farm boy.”
His breath catches. His hands tighten at your hips.
“You sure?”
You barely have time to answer before his hands slip lower—and then he’s moving. Effortless. Strong. He rises to his feet with you in his arms like it’s nothing, like you weigh nothing at all.
You yelp, startled, arms flying around his shoulders. “Clark!”
He grins again—that Clark Kent grin—bright and wide and unfairly charming, even with kiss-swollen lips and pupils so blown you can barely see the blue. “I thought you liked being carried by Superman.”
You narrow your eyes. “Do not start.”
His smile only widens as he carries you toward his bedroom like it’s the most natural thing in the world. “What? I think it’s cute that you have a crush.”
Your mouth drops open in mock outrage. “I told you that was a joke.”
“Oh, come on.” He’s laughing now—full and warm—and you hate how much you love it. “What was it you said? That he could break your back and you’d say thank you?”
You slap his shoulder. “I cannot believe you’re bringing that up right now.”
He just shrugs, eyes sparkling. “You said it. In front of several witnesses.”
“You’re the worst.”
“And you,” he murmurs, voice dipping low as he nudges the bedroom door open with one foot, “have been in love with me this whole time.”
You open your mouth, but no words come out. He’s still grinning—but it softens the second he lays you down, slow and careful, like you’re something priceless. Then he settles between your legs.
Your breath catches at the sight of him. On top of you. And then—
“Favourite colour?” you blurt, just to feel steady again—just to see if he still can’t lie.
He blinks. “Blue.”
“First thing you ever noticed about me?”
“Your laugh.”
“What’s your biggest fantasy?”
He groans. “You. In this bed. Right now. Can you—can you not?”
You smirk. “Ever jerk off thinking about me?”
He flushes scarlet. “Yes. Obviously.”
“Say something filthy.”
He makes a strangled sound, then mutters, “I want to come with your thighs around my head.”
You blink, stunned—and a little breathless.
He groans again and buries his face in your neck. “Stop taking advantage of me,” he mumbles against your skin.
You laugh—helpless, delighted. “I literally can’t. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”
His mouth finds the curve of your throat again—hot, open-mouthed, worshipful—and his hands tighten where they’re splayed across your hips. The teasing slips, melts away, becomes something quieter. Something serious.
“I mean it,” he whispers, lifting his head, his gaze burning into yours. “I want you. Not just right now. I want you. Forever.”
The words hang in the air between you, soft and searing, and for a moment, all you can do is stare at him—this man, this impossibly good man—whose weight is pressed heavy and solid between your thighs like he belongs there.
Because he does. He always has.
Your fingers slide up his neck, into his hair, pulling him down again until his mouth finds yours—hot and slow, like he means to burn the shape of it into his memory. His body moves with yours, a slow, rolling grind of heat and muscle and want. There’s no rush in it. Just need.
He kisses you like he’s waited a lifetime. Like he’s going to spend the rest of it making up for lost time.
When he breaks away, it’s only to press his lips to your cheek, your jaw, the hinge of it, then lower—trailing kisses to your throat like he’s tasting every inch, like he’s been starving for it. For you.
“I used to lie right here and imagine this,” he breathes, voice cracked and close, hot against your skin. “You. Under me. Wanting me.”
You gasp when his teeth graze your pulse, when he suckles gently at the spot. Then he soothes it with his tongue and lifts his head—eyes dark, full of heat and something more dangerous now. Something utterly undone.
“I have to get you ready for me,” he says softly, almost apologetic—but his hands are already moving, slow and sure, slipping beneath the hem of your shirt. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
Your breath stutters. Your thighs squeeze tighter around his hips.
God, Clark Kent is going to ruin you.
“Take your time,” you whisper, voice barely there. “I’m not going anywhere.”
He smiles—something small, crooked, adoring. And then he leans down, kissing you again, deeper this time, while his hands begin to explore.
He pushes your shirt up inch by inch, his palms dragging over your ribs, your sides—careful and reverent, like he’s learning, memorising, all of it. Like this is something sacred. His breath hitches when he bares your chest—and the lacy, nothing bra you’re wearing—and for a second he just stares, like he just can't believe you’re real.
“You’re beautiful,” he murmurs, almost to himself. “Gosh, you’re—”
You pull him back down to kiss you, fingers fisting in his hair, and he moans into your mouth as your hips rock up, seeking friction. His hands bracket your ribs, firm and warm, steadying you—grounding you—and when he pulls back again, it’s just far enough to press his lips to the centre of your chest.
“I want to make you feel so good,” he says, kissing lower. “I want to hear all the sounds you make. I want to watch your face when you come.”
You shudder, eyes fluttering closed.
“And I want—” He kisses your sternum. “To take my time.” Another kiss, lower. “So slow you beg.” One more, right above the waistband of your underwear. “So deep you scream.”
You gasp, your whole body arching up into his mouth—and he smiles against your skin, sweet and filthy and so, so in love it makes your head spin.
One of his hands slides under your thigh, lifting it gently, while the other tugs your shorts—his shorts—and panties down with aching care. He kisses the inside of your knee. Then the top of your thigh. Then a little higher.
You can barely breathe.
When he finally settles between your legs, he looks up—blue eyes blown dark but still so brilliantly, impossibly Clark—and the heat in them nearly knocks the wind out of you. He looks at you like you’re the only thing that’s ever mattered. The only thing he’s ever needed.
“Okay?” he murmurs, voice wrecked and low.
You nod—frantic. “Yes. God, yes.”
And then he lowers his mouth to you.
You cry out, fingers flying to his hair, hips jerking before you can stop yourself. His tongue moves slow at first, like he’s savouring the taste, mapping you out, learning every reaction. You feel his groan vibrate against you—feel the subtle roll of his hips into the mattress, like he’s not even aware he’s doing it.
Holy shit.
Clark Kent is between your legs. Clark Kent is making you feel like this. You can barely comprehend it. You’d laugh if you weren’t already half-shaking.
He hums again when you tug at his hair. His hands tighten on your hips like he’s grounding himself, like he needs you to stay still so he doesn’t lose control. You can feel it now—just beneath the surface—something wild and aching in him, restrained only by the thinnest, fraying thread.
And when you look down again, his eyes are still on you—bright blue, locked with yours, so full of hunger and wonder and want that you can’t breathe around it.
“Clark,” you whisper, almost a prayer.
His eyes flutter shut. He groans into you like the sound of his name on your lips might be his ultimate undoing.
And then he starts to really eat.
There’s no other word for it—he devours you. All soft lips and filthy tongue and low, guttural sounds that vibrate straight through you. His hands are everywhere—steadying you, spreading you open, holding you down like he’s afraid you’ll disappear.
You feel like you might pass out. Like your whole body has been waiting years for this—desperate, unsatisfied, quietly starving—and suddenly it’s too much. He’s too much. Too strong, too good, too fucking Clark.
You’re gasping his name on a loop, tugging at his hair, barely holding on—and then you feel it—the sharp, sudden snap of your bra giving way.
You startle. “Did you—?”
“I’m sorry,” he mutters against your cunt, voice rough with need. “I’ll buy you a new one.”
And then he’s back at it, moaning into you like he needs this more than the goddamn sun. Like he might die without it.
Your head tips back, a choked sound leaving your throat. You’ve pictured this. A thousand times. In a hundred different ways. But your imagination was subpar at best—because nothing, nothing, could’ve prepared you for the reality of Clark Kent between your legs.
Those bright blue eyes flicker up at you—needy, glassy, reverent—and the second your gaze locks, he groans again, fucking into you with his tongue like he’s trying to ruin you. The sight of him like this—desperate and devout—makes you shudder.
And then he gives you more.
One of those impossibly large hands curves up over your chest, thumb brushing your nipple, and the other slides between your legs—slow and careful, but sure. His fingers are thick, coaxing, stretching you open with gentle precision, and the pressure of them alongside his tongue makes you keen, hips lifting helplessly into the rhythm he sets.
“You feel…” he breaks off, voice muffled against you, breath ragged. “You feel so good. You’re so perfect.”
You can barely think. His mouth is relentless, his fingers maddening, and he’s everywhere—too much and not enough all at once. He groans again, this time deeper, more desperate, like he’s unravelling by the second.
“You’re so tight, sweetheart,” he murmurs, the words slipping out like he couldn’t stop them if he tried. “I need you to be ready for me. I—I’m trying to take my time, I swear—”
He’s losing it. You can feel it in the way his hand tightens on your breast, in the way his hips grind slowly down against the mattress, seeking friction. Superman, falling apart. Big, strong, godlike Clark Kent on his knees for you, coming more and more undone with every breathless moan you make.
You thread your fingers through his dark curls, tugging, trembling. “Clark—oh, fuck—please—”
“I’ve got you,” he breathes, voice wrecked. “I’ve got you. Just let go for me.”
And with his fingers curling just right, his mouth wet and hot and hungry, you do.
You come with a gasp and a full-body jolt, your hands in his hair, your thighs clamped around his head—but Clark doesn’t stop. Not even a little. His tongue keeps moving, slow and thick and dizzying, and his fingers never falter. You're writhing under him, trembling, oversensitive—but he’s got you. One hand bruises into your hip, fingers curling, holding you down like you weigh nothing at all, and his other forearm braces across your pelvis, anchoring you to the mattress as your body bucks helplessly against his mouth.
“Clark—please—” you gasp, too gone to string anything else together.
He’s whimpering into you now, low and desperate, hips grinding down against the bed like he needs something—anything—to keep from falling apart completely.
“Gotta get you ready,” he mumbles, voice deep, breath hot against you. “Need you open for me. You taste so good, sweetheart—so good—”
Another breathless moan spills from your throat. You’re shaking under him, thighs trembling, vision going a little white around the edges—but his mouth is still on you, relentless, adoring, starved.
You twist a fist in his hair and pull—hard—and he groans at the sting, finally lifting his head.
“Clark.” Your voice breaks—your whole body is flushed and ruined, but still you want more. “You said you wanted to fuck me.”
His eyes flicker—wide and dark and frantic.
“So fuck me.” You tug again, urging his face up toward yours. “I’m begging you. Fuck me.”
His restraint snaps with a full-body shudder, and suddenly he’s surging up over you, mouth crashing into yours, and it’s wild. Nothing soft about it. It’s teeth and tongue and groaning, desperate need, like he’s been holding this back for as long as he could—and now there’s no going slow.
He pulls back just enough to look at you—barely—but his hands are already moving. You can see them tremble as he pushes his sweats down his hips and kicks them off, like he’s barely holding on to enough control to get undressed. You glance down and instantly gasp.
“Oh my God.”
He chokes on a laugh—flustered, flushed scarlet—but it doesn’t slow him down. His chest heaves as he settles between your thighs again, mouth brushing yours with a shaky sort of reverence.
“You—you okay?”
“Take your shirt off,” you whisper, dizzy with need. “Please.”
He fumbles it over his head, tossing it aside in one swift movement—and you’re left blinking up at him, dazed and desperate, with nothing but his bare skin and broad chest and huge arms above you. He’s gorgeous. Flushed and beautiful and too damn much, and he’s yours.
“You’re staring,” he murmurs, a little breathless.
“You’re massive.”
His breath stutters at that, and he grins—but it’s helpless, strained, the kind of grin that says he’s one second from losing all control. “Yeah, I—should’ve warned you.”
“You kind of did,” you murmur, legs wrapping around his waist. “You said you had to get me ready for you.”
“I did.” His voice drops to a rasp as the head of his cock drags against your slick. “You feel—gosh, you feel like a dream.”
You blink. “Gosh?”
He groans, forehead dropping softly against yours. “Sorry. I’m—”
“Say it dirtier, Clark.”
“What?”
You grin, wild and breathless. “Come on. Tell me something filthy. I know you can do it. Just let go.”
He hesitates, clearly fighting every instinct in his wholesome Kansas-raised body—but then he curses under his breath and mutters, “You’re so fucking tight, I’m gonna lose my mind. I want to fuck you so deep you forget your own name.”
Your breath catches. “See?” you whisper. “That’s more like it.”
“I blacked out a little,” he mutters, still flustered.
“Say something else,” you breathe.
He groans again—almost a whine—his whole body practically trembling with restraint. “You’ve tortured me for years. Every time you smiled at me. Every time you touched me. Every time you fell asleep on my shoulder—I wanted this. You. All of you.”
And then he’s reaching between you, holding himself against your entrance with shaking fingers. You both gasp when the tip pushes in—just that—and it’s already too much.
“Oh my God,” you whisper again, clinging to his shoulders, the stretch impossibly intense even before he’s really in. “You’re not gonna fit.”
“I—I can stop—”
“No.” You’re shaking your head, eyes wide. “Don’t you dare. I want you. I want all of you.”
He lets out a soft, strangled moan, almost losing it then and there. “I’ll go slow. Just—just breathe.”
And then he starts to push in. Inch by slow, burning inch. His hands firm where they cradle your hips, his breath ragged against your cheek as your body tries to take him—tries to stretch around something impossibly thick, impossibly deep, impossibly Clark. Because of course this gorgeous, sweet nerd has an enormous cock.
You keen, nails digging into his back. “Jesus Christ—”
“Tell me if it’s too much,” he pants, voice cracking. “Tell me to stop and I will. Just—ugh, you feel so good. So perfect. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You’re not,” you whisper, eyes glassy. “You’re ruining me, but you’re not hurting me.”
He lets out a shuddering groan and kisses you—soft and aching and full of so much love you could cry. “I don’t want to ruin you.”
“Too late.”
You both laugh—helpless, breathless—and then he slides in just that little bit deeper, and the sound turns to a moan. You’re gasping, trembling, stuffed full, but you don’t want him to stop. Not for anything.
He kisses you through it—your mouth, your jaw, your throat—whispering apologies between every shuddering breath. His hands roam your body like he’s trying to worship it, like he’s trying to ground himself in the feel of your skin, your warmth, your everything. One hand splays across your ribs, thumb brushing the curve of your breast, the other grips your thigh, gently coaxing you open as he sinks deeper.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs again, wrecked. “You feel so good, I can’t—I’m trying—gosh, I’m trying—”
You can tell. Every inch he gives you is slow, reverent, but barely leashed—like his self-control is hanging by a thread and the only thing keeping it intact is you, trembling beneath him, arms locked around his neck, whispering please into the shell of his ear.
His nose nuzzles your cheek, your temple, his breath hot and uneven. “Tell me if I hurt you.”
“You’re not,” you gasp, even as you clench around him, every muscle taut and trembling. “You’re perfect. Just—just keep going.”
He kisses you again, deeper this time, a soft groan rising from his chest as he finally presses all the way in.
Your body tries to adjust around him, stretched and aching and overwhelmed, but all you can feel is him. Every solid inch. Every trembling breath. Every whisper of your name like a prayer. And then—he stills.
Buried to the hilt. Inside you.
Clark Kent, inside you.
You can feel his heartbeat against your chest. Feel him shaking, still trying not to move.
And then, in the quiet between two shared, ragged breaths, you realise—he’s crying.
Just a little. Just barely. But it’s there, glittering at the corners of his impossibly blue eyes as he looks down at you like you’re something he never thought he’d be allowed to touch.
“I love you,” he breathes. “I’ve always loved you.”
Your heart cracks open at the sight of him—this incredibly strong, impossibly good man trembling above you, full to bursting with love. You reach up, fingers brushing the corner of his eye, wiping the tear before it can fall.
“Clark,” you whisper, your own vision blurring. “I love you too.”
His breath hitches again, and for a second it feels like the whole world stills—just the two of you, wrapped in each other, like everything is finally aligned.
You cradle his face in your hands and press a soft, lingering kiss to his lips. Then another. Then you press your forehead against his and whisper, “Now fuck me like you promised, Kent.”
His eyes flutter closed, and a groan tears from his chest.
“I can take it,” you murmur, arching into him, your body already pulsing around the impossible stretch of him. “You’re not going to hurt me, so stop holding back.”
He pulls back just far enough to look at you, gaze wild and reverent all at once. “You—you’re sure?”
You nod, fingers threading through his hair, grinning now. “Fuck me.”
And just like that, whatever thread of control he was clinging to snaps.
He moves—finally, fully—and the sound he makes is feral, low and broken in the back of his throat. His hips snap forward once, then again, rough and barely restrained, and your whole body jolts beneath the force of it. He’s huge, maddeningly deep, the stretch still toeing the edge of unbearable—but you don’t want him to stop. You want more.
You rake your nails down his back, gasping as he fucks you with slow, jolting thrusts, like each one is him trying not to break—but the way his breath catches says he’s not going to last much longer. He’s flushed and wrecked and shaking, sweat collecting at his temples, strands of dark hair clinging to his forehead.
And he’s so fucking pretty.
That face—those big, blue eyes gone half-lidded and dazed, those kiss-bruised lips parted with every gasping moan he tries to bury in your neck. The muscles of his back flex beneath your hands, corded with tension. His shoulders shake. His grip bruises—literally—where he holds you.
He’s trying. Trying so hard to be careful.
But you don’t want careful.
“Clark,” you gasp—and his head lifts instantly, eyes locking with yours like he needs you to ground him, to steady him, to keep him from flying apart.
Your hands slide down his chest, nails dragging lightly over sweat-slicked muscle, and the sound he makes is barely human. The stretch still burns—you’re trembling, gasping—but you love it. You love him. You dig your heels into the backs of his thighs, pull him deeper. But it’s still not enough.
You lean up, mouth brushing his ear.
“Stop being careful,” you whisper. “Stop pretending you haven’t been dying to fuck me since the day we met.”
That’s all it takes.
He shudders—like the breath has been ripped from his lungs—and then he really snaps. Gone. Whatever shred of control he had left disintegrates, and he drives into you like it’s instinct, like it’s prayer, like he’s been holding this back for too long and can’t any longer.
“Sweetheart—” he chokes, forehead falling to yours as his hips pound into you, rough now, relentless. “You have no idea. I’ve wanted this—I’ve wanted you—for so long I thought I might lose my mind.”
His voice is thick, shaking. And his hands don’t stop moving—sliding up your ribs, cradling your breast, gripping your hip tight enough to leave marks like he still can’t believe this is real.
And all you can do is take it. Take him. Let him love you like this—with every shattered breath, every desperate thrust, every reverent inch of him finally, finally letting go.
He’s everywhere. Surrounding you, filling you, pressing you so deep into the mattress you don’t know where you end and he begins.
His mouth finds yours again—hungry, open, all tongue and teeth and need—but there’s nothing rushed about the way he kisses you. Even now, even like this, he still tastes you like you’re precious. Like you’re some kind of miracle.
And he won’t stop touching you. His hands roam your body like they’re mapping it, like he’s waited a thousand lifetimes to commit every inch to memory. One cups your breast, thumb circling your nipple until your whole body arches into him. The other drifts down your side, over your thigh, then back up again, everywhere at once, like he can’t bear not to be touching you.
“You’re so beautiful,” he murmurs, his voice low, wrecked—soaked in worship and disbelief. “You always have been.”
He thrusts deep, a little slower, and your breath catches. His name tumbles from your lips again, desperate.
“I’ve thought about this so many times,” he confesses, hips rocking into you with aching precision. “But nothing… nothing ever came close to this. You—” he groans, kisses the corner of your mouth, your jaw, your throat “—you feel like heaven.”
You cling to him, your fingers tangled in his hair, your legs wrapped around his hips. “Clark,” you breathe. “You’re gonna make me—”
“I know,” he whispers, kissing the tear that slips from the corner of your eye. “Me too. I’ve got you. I’ve always got you.”
And then he changes the angle—just barely, just enough—and you both feel it. You cry out, clutching at him as your whole body starts to shake. His rhythm falters for a second, stutters with the force of how much he’s holding back.
“I—I’m not gonna last,” he pants, burying his face in your neck. “You feel too good. You feel too good.”
“Don’t,” you whisper, heart pounding. “Don’t hold back.”
He lifts his head to look at you—his face so full of love it hurts—and then he kisses you like he’s saying goodbye to every year he had to pretend that he didn’t want this. That he didn’t want you.
And then he starts to move again—harder, rougher, deeper—and the heat builds sharp and fast, curling low in your belly as the whole world narrows to him. His body. His mouth. His voice rasping your name like it’s a holy thing.
You’re close. So is he. And you can both feel it.
But then he shifts—sits up on his knees, never slipping out of you—and the new angle punches a gasp from your throat, your back arching hard against the mattress.
“Clark—”
His hands find your waist, and his breath catches. For a second, he just stares—like he’s not sure he’s seeing right. Then one of his palms flattens against your lower belly, fingers trembling.
He can see himself—a thick, impossible bulge stretching you from the inside out.
“F—fuck, sweetheart,” he groans, voice wrecked, “I—I didn’t think…” He trails off, too far gone to finish. Too undone by the sight of what he’s doing to you.
The thrusts are deeper now, angled just right, and every drag of him against your walls you makes your vision go white. You’re a mess beneath him—head thrown back, hands tangled in your hair, then palming at your own breasts, too overwhelmed to know what to do with yourself.
And he’s watching all of it.
“You’re gonna break me,” you gasp, almost sobbing on a moan. “You’re gonna—Clark, I can’t—”
“Yes, you can,” he pants, dragging his thumb over your nipple, thrusting harder, faster, like he’s chasing something just out of reach. “You’re perfect. You’re so perfect—look at you—look at you.”
Your body starts to lock up, the orgasm barrelling toward you like it’s being pulled from your soul. You try to fight it—try to hold on for him—but he hits that perfect spot again and it breaks you.
You shatter around him with a scream, legs shaking, fingers digging into your thighs to ground yourself, and he feels it. Feels the way your body clamps around him, fluttering and pulsing, and it sends him reeling.
His thrusts lose rhythm. His hands clamp down hard—one gripping your hip, the other braced behind him—and he’s trying to hold back, trying so hard.
You force your eyes open just in time to see it happen.
His mouth falls open. A breathless moan rips from his chest. And his eyes—his bright blue eyes flare molten red for a half-second before he squeezes them shut and throws his head back, like he’s afraid of what’ll happen if he keeps looking at you.
A raw, animal sound tears out of him as he comes—deep inside you, again and again, his whole body shaking with it.
He’s trying not to break the bed. Trying not to break you.
And the heat of it—him, all of him—it feels endless.
Then finally, he stills.
You don’t know how long the silence lasts.
Long enough for your pulse to slow, your body to stop trembling, for your senses to crawl their way back into place—though you still feel wrecked, in the best possible way.
Clark leans over you, his body a trembling wall of heat. His arms are braced on either side of your head, eyes still squeezed shut, and his jaw is slack, like he’s still riding the aftershocks.
Then he exhales a shaky breath, nuzzles into your cheek, and whispers, “Are you okay?”
You hum, blinking up at him. “I think I saw God.”
That makes him laugh—soft, breathless, a little stunned. He presses a kiss to your temple, then your cheek, then the corner of your mouth.
“Sorry,” he murmurs, still catching his breath. “I was trying really hard not to… you know. Lose control. Burn a hole through the ceiling.”
You smile, boneless and glowing beneath him. “I think you did great.”
He kisses you again, then slowly, carefully, pulls out—and you both gasp. The stretch, the ache, the sudden emptiness—it makes your hips jolt, your fingers curl, and Clark wince in concern.
“Sorry—sorry—” he breathes, already reaching to cradle your waist, pulling you gently into his arms. He shifts you both onto your sides, wrapping around you protectively, like he’s trying to shield you from the whole world.
You melt into him, sighing as your limbs tangle together, his bare chest warm against your back, his hand stroking lazy circles over your belly.
After a minute, he presses a soft kiss behind your ear. “I think the gas has worn off,” he says quietly.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I mean—” he trails off, then grins against your skin. “I still want to say filthy things, but I'm not being compelled to.”
You giggle, turning in his arms to face him. His cheeks are flushed pink, his hair a mess, his blue eyes so soft you could cry. Again.
“You’d say them anyway?” you tease.
He brushes your hair back from your face, thumb tracing the curve of your cheek. “If you asked nicely.”
You pretend to consider it. “What if I get on my knees and beg?”
A groan vibrates in his chest. “You're a dangerous woman,” he murmurs. “I’m in so much trouble.”
You lean in and kiss him—slow and lingering, tasting the smile he can’t seem to get rid of. And then you whisper against his mouth, “I’ve been in love with you since the day we met.”
He pulls back just enough to look at you—eyes wide, like he still can't believe what you’re saying.
He cups your face, forehead resting against yours, and whispers, “Good. Because I’ve been in love with you for years.”
You blink up at him, smiling. “Years?”
“I told you,” he breathes. “You’ve been torturing me.”
You kiss him again, a little giddy now, your whole body aching and your heart so full it might burst.
And then, nestled against him, sleep starts to pull at you, but you fight it long enough to mumble, “Clark?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you think it’s too late for pancakes?”
He chuckles softly, tugging you closer. “You really are perfect.”
-
You spend the entire weekend at Clark’s apartment. Mostly in his bed—sometimes on the couch, or the kitchen counter, or in the shower. And once in the hallway, because you simply couldn’t make it any further without having him inside you.
By Sunday night, you finally tear yourself away—because you know you can’t show up to work Monday morning wearing a pair of his old boxers and a threadbare Metropolis U shirt.
You make it exactly twelve minutes at home, by yourself, before you’re packing a bag and heading right back to his place—relieved to find he’s just as desperate to have you back in his arms.
On Monday morning, you both wake up with every intention of being on time for work—but it doesn’t quite happen. Because when Clark steps out of the shower, fresh and steamy and completely naked, you can’t help yourself. And you’re starting to realise that he has a very hard time resisting you too.
So, after yet another mind-blowing, back-breaking orgasm, you both finally force yourselves to get dressed and head into the office.
“They’re going to know,” Clark mutters as the elevator doors slide shut.
There’s only one other person inside—an intern whose name you’ve forgotten.
You glance up at him. “How will they know?”
His lips twitch. “Well, for one, you’re limping.”
You bite your cheek to keep from grinning. “I can’t help that. Blame your Kryptonian physiology.”
“Now you’re blushing,” he murmurs, voice low enough for only you to hear. “Your heart’s racing. Your pupils are blown.” His eyes flicker down. “Your hands are trembling, and you’re—oh.”
His breath hitches slightly. You’re not sure if he can see it, feel it, maybe even smell it—but he knows. He knows exactly what you’re feeling right now. And if this poor intern weren’t in here, you’d probably both be halfway to naked already.
Your eyes lock—those ridiculous glasses framing that stupidly gorgeous face, blue eyes dark with want—and the moment stretches taut between you. You’re staring so hard, so heavy, that the soft ding of the elevator startles you.
Clark chuckles, stepping aside to let you exit first.
You try not to limp through the newsroom—but it’s hard. Your thighs are shaking. Everything aches. And you can feel every single bruise his mouth and hands seared into your skin.
“Well, well, well,” Jimmy says, scooting back from his desk with that stupidly wide grin. “Look who finally decided to show up—together.”
You roll your eyes. “We live in the same neighbourhood.”
Jimmy snorts. “Right. And I’m Superman.”
Clark coughs into his fist, clearly trying not to laugh. You shoot him a warning glance.
“I’m serious,” you add, dropping your bag beside your desk. “Same subway line. Total coincidence.”
“Mmhmm.” Jimmy swivels to follow your path, eyes tracking you like a hawk. “And the coincidence wore off on both your faces.”
You frown. “What does that even mean?”
You wince as your ass hits the chair—too fast, too sore. You try to cover it with a cough, but it’s too late. Clark is biting back a smile, and Jimmy’s eyebrows are practically in his hairline.
“You’re blushing,” he says. “Kent is glowing. And unless my hearing’s gone, you just whimpered when you sat down.” He leans forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. “Please tell me I don’t have to pretend I didn’t hear that.”
“You didn’t hear anything,” you mutter, shifting awkwardly in your seat.
He’s about to respond when he pauses—squinting at something. His grin widens, eyes locking on to something near the collar of your shirt.
“Oh my God. Is—is that a hickey?”
You slap a hand over your neck. “No.”
Clark chokes on nothing.
“It is!” Jimmy exclaims, jumping up from his chair to get a better look.
“No,” you say again, firmer. “It isn’t. It—it’s a burn. I burnt myself.”
Cat pops up from her desk, squinting. “Looks like a hickey to me.”
Lois spins around in her chair, smirking, arms crossed. “You burnt your neck?”
“It happens,” you mutter, fumbling for your phone to check the damage.
Clark gives you a helpless look over the top of his glasses, mouth twitching with a suppressed smile, cheeks red. And if he didn’t look so goddamn cute, you’d probably hurl a pen at him for leaving a mark so high.
“You’re seriously denying this?” Jimmy asks.
“I’m not denying anything,” you say. “I don’t have to deny it, because it isn’t anything. It’s just a bruise.”
Lois tilts her head. “You mean burn?”
“Yes—burn,” you say quickly. “Whatever. It’s still nothing. Now can we please—”
“Kent!” Perry’s voice booms across the bullpen. “My office. Two minutes. Bring your notepad.”
Clark nods once and scrambles to grab a pen and paper. Jimmy sighs—giving up for now—and collapses back into his chair. Cat drops down at her desk. Lois flicks her gaze from you to Clark, then slowly spins back around.
You sink lower into your chair as your monitor wakes up. You can see Clark collecting his things, tucking in his chair. He starts toward Perry’s office—then stops beside right your desk, and leans in.
You glance up just in time to catch the soft smile on his pretty mouth, his eyes sparkling behind his glasses. Then he reaches out—one hand gently cupping the back of your head—and presses a kiss to the top of your forehead.
It’s so sweet, so simple, it makes your chest ache. You almost—almost—forget where you are.
Until—
“I knew it!” Jimmy shouts.
Cat’s head pops up again. Lois spins around. Even Steve cranes his neck from across the bullpen.
“I was right,” Jimmy goes on triumphantly. “You two finally boned!”
“Olsen!” Perry shouts. “Watch your language.”
“Sorry, Chief,” Jimmy says—though still grinning like the smug little shit he is.
Your face burns as the bullpen erupts around you—laughter, gasps, even a slow clap from Steve. You sink deeper into your chair, wishing it would swallow you whole. And Clark—that traitor—just gives a soft chuckle, his shoulders shaking as he walks off toward Perry’s office, not even trying to hide the smug little smirk on his face.
You glare daggers into his back. He doesn’t turn around, but you swear he knows—you can feel it in the satisfied roll of his stride.
“I knew it,” Jimmy says again, practically vibrating with glee. “I called this weeks ago. Honestly, I feel vindicated.”
You groan, covering your face with your hands. “Jimmy, please.”
“I’m just saying!” he says, unrepentant. “You two have been doing the will-they-won’t-they tango since the Reagan administration. It was painful.”
You peek at him through your fingers. “You're being dramatic.”
“You weren’t even alive during the Reagan administration,” Lois states dryly.
“Exactly,” he says, grinning. “It’s been that long.”
You drop your hands, lips twitching despite yourself. “You’re impossible.”
He shrugs. “It’s a gift. Besides, I had a bet going with Cat, and this definitely means I win.”
“You didn’t win,” Cat calls. “You bet that we’d catch them making out in the office, and that was a forehead kiss.”
You groan again. “You’re the worst.”
“And yet,” Jimmy leans forward, cocking a brow, “I’m still your favourite.”
You open your mouth to argue—but hesitate.
His grin softens. “Seriously, though? I'm happy for you. Both of you.”
You blink.
“Clark’s a good guy, and you…” He nods at you meaningfully. “You deserve someone who looks at you like he does.”
Your throat goes tight, caught off guard by the sincerity in his voice. You swallow.
“Thanks, Jimmy.”
He gives you a mock salute, then leans back in his chair with a dramatic sigh. “Superman’s gonna be crushed, though. His favourite civilian, officially off the market.”
You snort. “I think he’ll survive.”
“Will he?” Jimmy muses, hands clasped behind his head, feet up on the desk. “I don’t know. He always seemed very invested in your wellbeing.”
You shake your head, cheeks still pink as you turn back to your monitor, heart thudding a little too fast in your chest.
Across the bullpen, just before Perry’s office door swings shut, Clark glances back at you.
i cld never shave bush not just bc im morally opposed to it but also bc what would i play with when im lying in bed thinking…a bush is the beard of the modern day philosopher
affirmations for writers: i know how to write. i have seen sentences before, and i know how to make one. i can identify up to several words and their meanings. i am not afraid of semicolons.
sorry but someone assuming you have "left a fandom" when you don't post about it a lot anymore feels like bilbo coming home to the sackville bagginses having him presumed dead and selling all his stuff. girl i was just on a little quest????
Eileen and her family have come under attack by Israeli occupation forces (the Israeli army)❗
The occupation forces are currently bombing the area with gas canisters, and it is likely that they will begin shooting or shelling at any moment! 😞💔
The family is trying to escape, but three of its members suffer from physical disabilities. Adam, her 13-year-old son, has a head condition that limits his mobility.
Ala'a, her 20-year-old daughter, is unable to use her leg due to a previous injury caused by an earlier attack by the occupation forces. 💔
As for Eileen herself, she suffers from severe back pain, which makes it very difficult for her to move. 💔
Shaimaa, her 18-year-old daughter, is doing everything she can to help the family escape. 🥹💔
Eileen’s father, , lives with them in the tent.
He is 70 years old and sustained serious injuries during the war ، He has diabetes and was injured in a nearby bombing, which resulted in damage to his chest, shoulder, and right eye. He is in dire need of urgent surgery to regain his sight in it again.
Her mother She lost her life due to lack of treatment and hunger, as she was a cancer patient. May God protect us and you.
The family urgently needs transportation to escape, but it costs around $904 USD.
The situation is extremely dangerous and sensitive! We don’t know what the occupation forces are planning, and any delay could be fatal! 💔
Please share the family’s campaign and donate if you can! 🙏🏻💔💔
90-ghost verified
Hello, my name is Noé from France and I'm fundraising to help a friend and h… Noemie Pounder needs your support for Help Eileen's family in
summary: bob and you now navigate the implications of your curse by the TVA
pairing: bob reynolds x variant fem!reader
word count: 4.6k
content: angst and yearning on both ends, they’re in LOVE! fluff and honestly just self indulgence at this point. it’s christmas but reader doesn’t celebrate it, reader also has to wear a dress, swearing, more heavy use of dialogue, reader is v emotional and still an avid tea drinker. touch starved babes, eventual kissing but not how you would expect. tva inaccuracies again.
a/n: mwah ty for the love on part one! not proofread hehe. also i confess to not seeing s2 of loki so i’m none the wiser to anything past the first season
taglist: @amandarobertsboyce @micro-kat @kurogxrix @gavin-isstupid - tysm for reading 🫶
You woke up with a splitting headache.
Days had bled into weeks since the exposé on your deep dark secret, that you were not an Earth-616 Variant. Your existence did not belong amongst the chaos of this New York in all it’s anarchic glory. It was the perfect sweet spot, tucked deep into the belly of the TVA library, you had spent countless hours — no, minutes? — peeling pages upon pages out of manilla coloured folders, to find a Timeline which you could simply dissolve into the background of.
Earth-616. Plenty of things wrong with it. A handful of things right with it. Including the sole reason you had been arrested, fought off pruning, escaped and arrested thrice more. Robert Reynolds. A little wounded, an exponential amount of skeletons in his closet and you adored every corner of it.
It took a lot of background work, to ensure you had chosen a place that you could escape the prying hands of the TVA and locate Bob.
Your memory so vivid of that time. The paper cuts, calloused fingertips from endless paperwork being handled from the start of the day until the very end, where Mobius M. Mobius had tracked you down within the confides of the TVA and banished you to your room to sleep before the trial.
The sickening drench of the colour orange wherever you looked. Unable to rest, you’d pad around the infinite halls before slipping into the same room you had been thrown into the first incident that you had been arrested. No longer coated in fear, but grieving a loss of the life you knew still existed within the realms of time.
Lights flickered in the darkness, an image pooled upon the screen in front of you: VARIANT Y1097 FILES. An ache in your bones at the title, a sadistic element to your viewing of your own life. You’d press the button with hesitation, eyes wide with wonder over a treasured lifetime.
There he was. Hair a little shorter, but face all the same. Swamped in anxiety and self-deprecation, but his eyes poured with love whenever you watched the scenes between you two unfold. You two led a simple life in that Timeline, nested in New York City, adopted an all white mountainous feline, Sierra and even introduced the likes of therapy to Bob.
If you hadn’t come across the advertisement for Wonder Inc. taped to a lamppost just two blocks down from your apartment, you and Bob would be tethered for that lifetime. Your eyes welled as they always did, to the sight of your greyed hairs, thinner as Bob’s was cut short to maintain thickness on the top. Laughter lines plenty, hands spotted with age; you died first. The end of your tape concluding that you craved the simplicity of life with Bob Reynolds. No matter how you found it.
Your name was called. And for a moment, you felt the panic creep up the back of your neck. Sight blurred from being unfocused, you blinked back into the moment to see the man you had been daydreaming your lost life with.
If you could have, you would’ve smoothed the wrinkle set between his brows with worry.
“I lost you there.” He mumbled.
You always lose me.
You conjured up a smile, “Sorry. What were you saying?” You peered over your shoulder — as you always did — awaiting that familiar orange glow and TVA guards tenfold.
“It’s OK.” Bob started, “I was just mentioning that Yelena returned your files back to Valentina’s office.”
You visibly tensed. Back straightened, throat bobbed from a hard pill to swallow. Valentina Allegra de Fontaine was malice incarnate, she taunted you from the sidelines, her own version of a puppet with strings because one act of defiance, and she would be the one to make the call.
It had been two weeks since Bob had excavated the skeletons of your TVA file, it had led to a sudden bloom of friendship — to that you were thankful for — you routinely walked side by side to the kitchen in the dark mornings of December, shoulders brushed against the fabric of your clothes, subtle stolen glances at side profiles whilst the other was busy in their mind. To say it alarmed the rest of the team was an understatement. They thrived on the jest that Bob repelled you to the complete opposite side of the room, his heavy efforts not going unnoticed.
Now? You were practically joint at the hip.
It was a blessing and a curse. A curse that rained down as Valentina, heels clicking against the refurbished floor, pencil skirt to match the blazer as she sauntered into the kitchen with her sights set on you. Prepared to do anything, you turned your full attention to her pursed purple stained lips, a twitch in her right eye as she began to smirk with intent.
She spoke your name like it was a death sentence, “You didn’t happen to cross paths with a particular file during your admin work, did you?” You had shaken your head with vigour, fingers clenched around your designated tea drinking mug enough that you might’ve crushed it into dust. Valentina tilted her head, palms smoothed over the counter, “I’m missing a file. A very important one. I think we both know what I’m talking about.”
Yes. For two different reasons. One: Bob had stolen it in partial innocence — he sat beside you, sweat on his brow — and two: you wanted that file. The manipulative, devil in nature that brandished a white streak of hair, could publish your documents at any given time. Unleashing a relentless force, a sequence violation, and you would be right back where you started in the shackles of the TVA.
Hands tied, Bob — riddled with guilt — set Yelena the task of returning the file that Alexei had kept to use as a comically large bookmark. With a light snort after Bob questioned her capability of not being caught, Yelena slipped the dog-eared file back with nonchalance to her skill.
You would earn those files back. One day.
“Did I say something wrong?” Bob asked when you didn’t reply to his statement. He thought he had done right by restoring the cracked peace between you and Valentina. Visibly unravelled in nerves, you offered a warm smile and Bob softened.
“No. Thank you, Bob.” You meant it. Although the slight grit of your teeth said otherwise. Quick to change the subject, you added, “I hope you’re not a Kleptomaniac at tonight’s Christmas Gala.”
You, personally, didn’t celebrate Christmas. The Watchtower decked out in tacky decor with vintage LED lights that John Walker had torn from a building near by, just because he liked them. The team weren’t incredibly enthusiastic about the festivities, but, Valentina made it clear it was vital to your image as the New Avengers. Secret Santa gifts were a must!
Bob deflated. Socialising wasn’t his strong suit. A ticking time-bomb, he preferred to reside in the shadows whilst the rest of the team played the socialites role. However, he wasn’t getting out of the Christmas Gala — taken by Walker and Barnes to be fitted for a suit.
Things were different though.
He had you now. Things were different within two weeks, fourteen days, because of you. Suddenly, he felt anchored, validated in that odd feeling that clawed its way out from his stomach whenever he caught glimpses of you avoiding him. There were multiple versions of you, and multiple versions of him that belong together, written in the scripts of your lives. You existed, in your form that had Bob stumbling over his words, palms clammy when he caught the underlying note of your perfume, eyes lingering on you in meetings and, yet, he couldn’t have you.
Bob would tolerate the Gala; because you were there.
The question came as it always did.
“Is there a version of me that, that loves socialising?” Bob cringed at your expression. Rules had been set out. Rule one: Don’t ask about Bob Variants. That was it. But, you found a way to tell him in subtle blinking. One for yes. Two for no.
You blinked twice.
At least you still loved him in every timeline.
“I’ll see you later for the Gala.” You dropped from the barstool, and as you walked out of the kitchen, you called over your shoulder, “Don’t forget your Secret Santa gift!”
The sky grew black and snow began to cascade from the heavens above whilst the aristocrats of New York filtered into the Watchtower for the black tie event. Bob fiddled with the cufflinks of his suit as he waited beside Bucky who had helped him briefly to tie his bow tie. Failure to succeed, Bucky had unclipped his fake one and swapped with Bob to salvage any embarrassment bestowed upon the younger male.
The rest of the team trudged through from their rooms, freshened up to satisfy Valentina’s command. Yelena beelined for Bob, wearing a floral suit with her hair slicked back, a growing smile shown as she approached him.
“Look at you.” She patted his shoulder.
“Oh, thanks, Lena. I—You look cool.” Bob warmed in his face as Yelena posed from his compliment. He went to laugh, the joyful feeling caught in his throat and exchanged for a stammered, teenage whine when you entered the mouth of the foyer to greet guests. “Shit.”
There you were, confidence unshaken as you approached the rest of your team, figure exposed in a dress you hated but wore to keep Valentina’s threats at bay. Two wobbling Christmas trees clipped atop of your head, face beaming at your chosen family.
If you had a visible aura, it would be a glowing gold, Bob thought. Every part of you as beautiful as the next feature he stared at upon your face. His throat bobbed, a gentle elbow to his rib and he caught Yelena staring back at him with a brow quirked; he was quick to collect himself.
Your eyes trailed down Bob’s frame and back up to his face, his ears reddened as you pinned him under your playful gaze. You couldn’t kiss, that you were sure of. But, you’d ruffle his feathers a little for the sake of indulgent flirtations. Fingertips pinched the bow tie askew around his collar, his lung sucked in a breath from your closeness as you straightened it out. The closeness made Bob considerably dizzy. Months of longing to even sit next to you, had now flipped him on his head and shown him what closeness he really craved.
You patted his chest, “Handsome.”
Bob croaked, “Your dress—Good.” He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head with a nervous laugh, “I meant—”
“—I know. Thank you, Bob.”
“Ugh.” Yelena’s voice cut through the atmosphere, her right cheek filled with a striped Candy Cane, it left her mouth with a pop as she waved at you both, “This is disgusting. Are you guys falling in love?”
“What? No.” Bob was quick to cover tracks.
Then John Walker chimed in, “Oh yeah?” You both stared at him, oblivious to his next sentence, “Then why did I catch you two stumbling out of the Cleaners Cupboard two weeks ago? Huh?”
You looked to the comical Turkey hat on his head, eyes narrowed, “Your hat. Much better than that beret.”
Walker tightened his lips and Bucky — the voice of reason — stepped in with his hands up to settle the situation growing arms and legs. He had considerably aged in the presence of the Thunderbolts* turned New Avengers; grey hairs sprouted from the roots at his scalp.
Ushered by Bucky to enter the room where the highbrow, intellectual snobs resided in — Walker grabbing you in for a quick headlock — all beady eyes behind false pretences stared at the group with a few members missing, Ava and Alexei already mingling in their own way.
Yelena leant close to your ear, “Ten dollars goes to the first person to have a drink thrown over them.”
“Deal.” You mumbled, all of you dispersing into the crowd — Bob flipping between you and Yelena before subconsciously pulled in your direction.
Exercising your capability to talk the ear off of people, you used this to your advantage. Gesticulate in your manner, you became off-putting to the people you were made to socialise with. Faces screwed, and pearls clutched, most attendees would shuffle along — some skipping you completely — as you began to explain in depth about gruesome subjects that would make their eyes water.
Valentina Allegra de Fontaine watched you from afar, not to your knowledge, but she always did.
And she wasn’t impressed.
Once ridding a trio of politicians with some hard hitting trivia, you and Bob had made it to the long table displayed with hearty food for the buffet. You plucked cheese from the charcuterie board and grinned back at Bob who couldn’t bring himself to take food without permission.
His hands wrung, head swivelling to watch others around him. Self-conscious because, really, he didn’t belong mingling like this. He hadn’t said two words in the time you had pushed away five groups of strangers and it made him begrudgingly feel a little silly. But — again — you were you and it was becoming apparent that you balanced Bob Reynolds out. Where he lacked, you made up for.
Maybe there was a Variant of him and you that were the opposites of your personalities.
He would ask another time.
Head turned back to you when you offered a block of cheese in his face, Bob politely declined and you threw it into your mouth, satisfied and unaware of his own self-loathing.
“You look beautiful.” Bob blurted out. His own eyes wide as you stopped your chewing to stare through him and into his soul. He pulled at the collar of his shirt, “That is what I meant to say to you earlier.”
You took a hard swallow to rid your mouth of cheddar, “I think I like when you compliment me.”
Warmth spread across his chest like wildfire. A newfound sense of confidence as a lopsided smile graced his face in your confession. God, he wanted to fucking kiss you.
“Yeah?” He couldn’t believe his boldness.
“Look at this!” Alexei cut through any remainder of a conversation with his imposing voice. His tall stature loomed over you and Bob with a grin as wide to bare his teeth. Brows furrowed, you peered up to see a twig of green and white foliage hung above your heads. He feigned a gasp, “Mistletoe! Now—It’s Christmas rules. You must kiss.”
You dropped your gaze to Bob in a panic. The sudden softness shared between you replaced with perturbation. Hands reached for the branch and Alexei moved it higher above with ease. The sudden race of your heart could’ve been heard at the other end of New York when you felt heads turn to stare in anticipation. It could’ve been the worst outcome that you would be unable to explain to the team after enforcing rejection upon a silly tradition.
Bob felt the anxiety radiate off of you and he felt helpless. Gawping like a fish out of water, Bob couldn’t think of a solution to the problem. Alexei was determined in his bid for humiliation.
“Dad, you’re embarrassing them.” Yelena pointed out in defence from her comfortable position on a chaise lounge. Champagne dangling from her hand.
“Nonsense!” Alexei argued, “Do you fear kissing? Just a little peck.”
You shook your head with vigour, “No. We—I can’t do that, Alexei. Can you please take the Mistletoe away from us?” Alexei frowned, not understanding your point as he hovered it above Bucky Barnes, who was close in proximity to you. Bob’s eyes almost popped out of his skull as you called in frustration, “No, Alexei! Take it away completely!”
Albeit a little befuddled by your sudden outburst, Alexei persisted and held the foliage above you and Bob again. Earning a groan from your throat as you pinched the bridge of your nose. You looked to the glass in your hand, immediate in your action as you poured it down the front of your dress.
“Hey!” Yelena shouted, “That does not count!”
You stared at the reddened stain that seeped into the woven fabric of your dress, tears prickled your waterline as you looked back up at Bob who went to reach out to comfort you. The room felt hot, your clothes tighter than when you had first wiggled into them. Hushed tones of alarm over your actions made your face warm from your neck to the very top of your head.
Throwing Alexei daggers, you turned on your heel, bottom lip wobbled as you shoved past Bucky who tried to halt your advances out of the door.
Bob was hot on your heel, and Bucky managed to grapple his forearm, “What the hell happened?”
“I—I don’t know.” Yeah, he did. “I’m just going to make sure she’s OK.”
Bucky nodded and let Bob go.
Foot wedged between the closing doors of the elevator, you followed the leg up to see Bob prying them open. He huffed as he stumbled in, dusting off fake dirt on his suit jacket to retract any attention away from your silly outburst. You wiped at your tears, chin tucked to your shoulder to try remain hidden in your vulnerability.
It was torturous. Everyday a reminder that flayed at your skin, that you caused the greatest loss of your life. And now? You had to live within the same Watchtower as him, aware that any wrong move would unravel your hard work. Any moment of weakness, and loneliness in the shape of a TVA beige jumpsuit and shock collar would be your punishment.
Valentina Allegra de Fontaine would make sure of it.
Bob pressed the button to close the doors, “Cleaners Cupboard?” Where it all began. He peered at you with a sympathetic look, his fingers twitched at his sides to soothe you by his touch.
“Sure.” You smiled meekly.
It took no time to reach the Cleaners Cupboard, Bob held the door open for you and gestured for you to walk in first as if you were entering The Ritz. He followed you in, door clicked shut and he pulled the toggle to illuminate the tiny shack of a room. Your face glowed under the light, tear stricken but a little humorous with the miniature trees that wobbled on your head.
Throwing his shyness overboard, Bob reached for your hand, gentle in his tracing of your wrist before settling his finger between yours.
“‘M sorry.” You mumbled like a scolded child.
It turned out that this Variant of Bob had a strike of confidence in your moment of weakness.
He shook his head, “You don’t have to apologise.” A squeeze to your hand and a drop of his head to meet your eyes, “It hurts you. I know it does.”
You remained silent.
Bob took a step closer — which you had thought would be impossible in such a tiny room.
“I know it hurts you, because, without witnessing what you have witnessed, it somehow hurts me,” He took your hand and placed it on his chest to feel the thrum of his heart, “Right here.”
Fingers flush against his warm chest, you watched your hand for a moment before returning Bob’s eye contact. You were exposed at the core of your emotions, hard exterior cracked as your own demons shone through.
Sobered by his sudden assertiveness, you let your jaw slacken, his judgement clearly clouded by his own harboured feelings. Yet, you found yourself still as Bob brought you to him. Bodies now flush, desperation clung in the air just to be able to touch each other in a tender moment.
“I want to kiss you.” Bob nudged your nose with his, his breath touched your lips as his eyelids grew heavy with the lust for a simple kiss. It was easy to slip into submission, throw caution to the wind and allow yourselves the indulgence of each other.
You leant into his touch, his thumb smoothed against your jawline. A wicked form of torture as the TVA would have you pruned from existence the moment their screens flickered from the kiss. It was the hardest motion you had made — moving away from Bob — your forehead pressed to his shoulder with a groan muffled.
“We can’t.” You pulled back and Bob tracked your face, eyes occasionally dropping to the plump of your lips. You continued, “I can’t go through umpteen loopholes with the TVA again. In fact, I don’t think even Mobius would be able to salvage my reputation.”
“Mobius?” Bob queried and you waved him off. Long story, he guessed.
“If there was a way, Bob, I’d have kissed you the moment I met you. Trust me. My impulsive control is award-winning.” Your shoulders deflated, defeated by your own imprisonment, “If there was a way we could kiss and not have our lips touch, that would be the solution to all of our problems.”
Bob leant back on the heels of his feet, his fingers thread between yours as he mulled over your throw away comment.
If a lightbulb could’ve blinked above his head, it would have.
He straightened his posture with urgency, his hand left yours as he turned on his heel to search through the cluttered shelves. You watched over his shoulder, his frantic rummaging made your expression drop to medium concern. Bob was mumbling to himself before he drew out a long rod of Saran Wrap; gleeful in his findings.
You stood still on the spot as he turned back to you, desperately ripping at the relentlessly fiddly plastic, chucking the roll onto the floor and presenting you with the shortened Saran Wrap as if it were a precious reward.
“Wow. Nice.” You blinked and Bob rolled his eyes playfully.
“Think about it. If—if there was a way that we could kiss where our lips don’t touch.” He pulled at either end of the plastic wrap, “It’s a loophole. I found a loophole for us.” He smiled, suddenly feeling insecure, “That’s if you—if you would like to kiss.”
You shot Bob an incredulous look, “Are you kidding me?”
Oh no. Bob felt his pride falter. He had misread your signals. You snatched the cut Saran Wrap from his grasp, immediate in your action to pull it taught against your lips before yanking Bob in by the neck. He yelped from your sheer force, his hands flying out to the side as you planted a hefty kiss against his lips — a thin loopholed barricade between you — whilst your arms wrapped around his neck to hold him as tight as possible.
Wide-eyed, Bob whimpered out, his brain short-circuiting after computing that you were kissing. You and Bob. As it was written in the stars for every version of you two out in the universe. His stiffened body relaxed, a satisfied, low hum elicited from the back of his throat as he melted into your touch. Your index finger came to twirl the locks of hair at the nape of his neck, goosebumps rose on his arms before he let his hands guide themselves to your waist.
It was everything you had been anticipating. The ache of longing foretold in every arrest, punch to the gut from a TVA guard, and nights spent in a cell awaiting your trial. Headaches from research trying to find Bob Reynolds without his own Variant soulmate, where you could slip into his life without ever pressuring him to fall deeply for you. If adoring Bob from afar was meant for your lifetime within the Sacred Timeline; then you’d spend everyday relishing in his presence.
This, however? Was so much more.
You pulled back, the sudden creep of anxiety began to creep its fingers over your shoulder. Bob followed your lips, his eyes closed as he almost cried out to you to never stop kissing him. Perhaps, you began to panic, Bob hadn’t found a miraculous loophole and you waited to hear the all too familiar noise of the TVA storming the Watchtower.
Ear perked as you peeled the wrap from your mouth, Bob plucked it from your fingers and placed it to his mouth, the plastic moulded to his lips as he pressed them against the corners of your mouth. You could’ve been distracted if it weren’t for the burning fear that you had made a grave mistake. Then, as if miracles existed, there was no sudden rush from TVA guards. You remained against Bob, your hearts joint in quickened pace, relief drowned your senses.
Bob had found a loophole.
“You have,” Bob kissed you, “No idea,” Another plastic wrapped kiss, “How badly, I’ve wanted to do this.”
You grinned into his lips, “I think you’re showing me now.”
Bob hummed, one last kiss to savour you in the Cleaners Cupboard before he pulled back and peeled the Saran Wrap off of his lips. Hair slightly wild from your grabs, you both shared a laugh at the absurdity of your situation, your hands smoothing the tufts of hair back into place. It was ridiculously unreasonable, but the pair of you would celebrate your wins.
There was an invisible string attached to the pair of you after all.
Bob scratched at his brow, “I—Uh—Can I give you my Secret Santa present?"
“Bob.” You were monotonous in your tone, “The hint is in the name. Secret. But, OK. You funnily enough, were my Secret Santa, too. I left your present downstairs and I don’t fancy going back in my wine stained dress to fetch it.”
“Later.” Bob waved it off, “Just. . . Wait here. I think you’ll like it.”
You nodded and hastily, Bob pulled the plastic film across his lips to press a chaste one to yours before he exited the Cleaners Cupboard to retrieve your Not-So-Secret Santa gift whilst running on a high from kissing you in the very cupboard he found out that you were essentially soulmates until the end of time.
Arms folded, you leant your head back in disbelief. If it was acceptable, you may have let out a scream of gratification.
Immediately distracted, your eyes dropped to the warm orange glow that slid from the bottom of the door you hid behind. Brows pinched, you smiled in curiosity; awaiting Bob on the other side with his gift in hand.
“Bob?” You called, “What the hell did you get me?”
Bob returned to the Cleaners Cupboard, peering from behind the largest Monstera plant he could find in all of New York City. An ode to a reference that earned him the knowledge of your cold shoulder two weeks prior. He had played over the joke he would tell you when he handed it over, tinsel wrapped around the stem of it.
With minor struggle, Bob twisted the doorknob to the cupboard, “Alright. Here you go—” The emptiness of the room made Bob stop at the threshold. Eyes drifted down, he caught a glimpse of the headband you had worn with the two Christmas trees glued to it.
Bob felt nauseous.
Carelessly, he dropped the Monstera plant, the terracotta pot smashed upon impact. He replaced it in his grasp with the headband you had adorned just a few moments prior. When you two were kissing. Loophole kissing — he was so sure of it. Bob turned to look outward into the hallway and then back into the cupboard where he felt his heart clamp down in an iron vice.
The realisation hit and he called out your name softly.
summary: bob always wondered why you didn’t favour him over the rest of your team. until he learned that you had unsettled the bones of the tva.
pairing: bob reynolds x fem!reader
word count: 4.1k
content: just a silly fic! heaaaavy amount of dialogue. bob is a yearner for readers attention, yelena being a menace, tva mentioned (not entirely accurate for the sake of the plot), a little bit of angst between two lost soulmates. finding nemo mcu crossover if u look into it
a/n: inspo taken from the we can’t be friends mv! i love a good invisible string soulmate trope. i have an idea for a pt 2 but idk if this is a good read to start off with
Bob didn’t understand.
There he was, swaddled in self-conscious agony, hands wrung when he stammered out to you to ‘break a leg’ for the upcoming mission that he and — on this occasion — Yelena Belova had been benched for. The widow sat at the alcove in the Living Quarters with her eyes glued to the New York City skyline when Bob queried if she would wave the rest of the team off.
She did not.
Courageous enough, Bob waited on the sidelines for you to finish the prep of your tactical gear, a faint smile on his features when you returned his gaze. It was on the cold side, your fleeting glance, that is, and Bob swallowed the lump of shyness in his throat to just talk to you.
The conversation concluded how it always had. You thanked Bob for his well wishes, a strained smile that never met your eyes and Bob couldn’t quite pinpoint what your problem with him was. You were never inherently mean to the guy, relatively polite in minimal conversation before scarpering off to the other end of the room before Bob could finish his sentence. He started to joke that you were his own version of an Irish Goodbye.
He awkwardly waved at your back, quick to make it look as if he was catching a fleck of dust when he noticed you didn’t spare him a look over your shoulder.
There was something niggling in the bones of his body about you. A magnetic force that kept drawing him to you, and yet, you would repel in the opposite direction and Bob was left gluttonous, the need to around you was much greater than any embarrassment he momentarily felt when you stepped away to leave him high and dry.
Of course, Bob wasn’t harassing you. In fact, you had your own little quirks that explained to him that you were happy to be situated in proximity to him; just not long enough to delve deeper into each other’s personal lives.
Valentina Allegra de Fontaine had recruited you out of the blue, and the Thunderbolts* — now reclaimed as the New Avengers — were left scratching their heads at the newest addition after New York Times had printed the heroes cemented in the group in black and white. She had hinted that you were potentially a temp, community service if you read between the lines.
Nobody had heard of another vigilante scouring the streets of New York. Yelena, naturally, wanted to peek at the cards close to your chest. Albeit a fond friendship that blossomed between Yelena and you, she hadn’t quite cracked the code to opening Pandora’s Box.
Whilst the perplexity of you weighed heavy on Bob’s shoulders, he retreated back to the Living Quarters to spend the time benched with his nose in a book for distraction. He supposed Yelena would still be brooding in the alcove, the injury sustained caused her to be seen as a liability when Bucky Barnes discussed tactics for their mission. Either way, Bob encouraged quiet time, even if he was in the same room as his friend.
“I’m bored.” Yelena spoke freely after thirty minutes of silence. Bob pinched the sentence he had read up to and looked up to the blonde. She exhaled deeply, knife twirled in her hand, “Can we do something fun?”
He’d bookmark the page for now.
Bob closed the book, “Are—Is this not fun?”
“No.” Yelena was truthful, he’d give her that. Her temple pressed against the glass of the window, “I want to move my limbs, Bob. You should to.”
“I did. I washed the dishes.” Bob said obliviously and Yelena scoffed. He added quickly, “What, uh, what do you wanna do then?”
Yelena sat up, “A little birdie told me there are a stack of confidential files in Valentina’s office. She’s not here. I say, let’s go have a look.” Bob shook his head and Yelena threw her hands up, “Come on, Bob. This is exposure therapy to adrenaline. Minimal chance of us getting caught but if we do, I’ll take the hit.”
The peer pressure was all too soul consuming and that led to Bob jittering behind Yelena whilst she picked the lock to Valentina’s office. He bounced on the balls of his feet, head almost turning 360 degrees at any sudden noises that alerted him of being caught red-handed. Yelena seemed to be taking her sweet time for being a trained assassin, although Bob knew it was partly to make him squirm.
Just as he began to form a sentence to usher Yelena along, he looked back to see the door click and the handle go down with ease — Yelena quick to throw a smug look over her shoulder. They crept in, Bob bumping into the back of Yelena with a mutter of an apology for not paying attention.
“Stop being so twitchy.” Yelena whispered, “It’s OK.”
“Sorry.” He apologised again and his eyes scanned the office for any obvious sign of stacked files that screamed confidential.
Yelena spotted it first. Manilla folders atop of the glass table she would occasionally sit at if genuinely required within the Watchtower, — much to John Walker’s dismay — Yelena pounced at the opportunity to have them in her grasp, fingers smoothed over the red stamp: CONFIDENTIAL.
Quick to open, she handed a random one carelessly to Bob as she flipped the first file in her hand open, eyes dropped down the page before scoffing and throwing it to the side.
“Boring.” She muttered continuously.
Bob stared down at the manilla file in his hand, hesitant to open it. There was something about a breach of privacy that made Bob’s skin crawl. Whoever, and whatever was within these files weren’t meant to be seen for his eyes. His sense of anxiety washed up to the feet of Yelena who halted her actions to stare up at him.
“You only have the one file, Bob.” Yelena explained the obvious, “You’re practically innocent with just one file. Read it and we can go.” Bob went to argue his case and Yelena held up a finger, “Uh-uh. Exposure therapy.”
“Right. . .” Bob heeded instruction and delicately opened to the front page. His throat constricting to see an image of you — no — a mugshot of you brandished in a beige jumpsuit with the letters TVA stamped across the right-side of the clothing. Your face struck with confusion in the photo, eyes wide with a collar round your neck. His brows pinched, “Yelena, what is the TVA?”
Yelena repeated, “The TVA? No idea.”
He went to look at your file again, your name typewritten along with other details of your being, your arrest ID and ultimately, your charge. It read: sequence violation and that meant nothing to Bob. Suddenly, he felt rather protective of your file, lifting his gaze to where Yelena sat with her feet up on the desk, invested in whomever it was in the sixth file she had picked up.
He went back to scanning the thick wad of pages in your file, counting his lucky stars that he was an avid reader and could retain information without dwelling on the page for too long at any given time.
Turns out, you had been arrested four times. For the same reason, a sequence violation. Page flipped, Bob felt his mouth run dry at what he could presume was a recitation of your words from the moment you had arrived at the facility where you had been arrested. It started off with questions, you were worried coated with confusion as to where you were. Then, like a sucker punch into his chest, the wind was knocked out of Bob when he read over the sentence in which you asked to be returned to him.
“Have you got anything good?” Bob slammed the file shut when Yelena snapped him back to reality.
A vigorous shake of his head, he stammered, “Uh, no. No I don’t. Just a low level criminal.” The file slowly went behind his back as he talked, “Why do you think Valentina has all these files?”
“I don’t know. I was kind of hoping I’d find something on you know who.” Yelena wiggled her brows and stood, the files slapped against the desk carelessly. Bob gulped as she rounded the desk, “Oh well. I’m going to go eat. . . You coming?”
“Sure.” Bob followed the blonde out, his eyes drifted back to the office as he fidgeted with your file tucked into the back of his pants.
Successful in not being caught, it had been hours since Yelena and Bob’s escapade with the Confidential Files which led Bob, to well, petty theft — but rightfully so — and three hours of endless reading of your script whilst contained at the so-called TVA facility. Things didn’t add up, you were talking in circles, begging to see Bob one more time before they pruned you. He didn’t know what any of it meant. It looked as if it were a knockoff time travel script for a television show.
He would have to ask you.
Once he returned the files to you.
That was also the other complication he faced. He had invaded your privacy, even if you didn’t have knowledge toward the said file. It would be a given that you wouldn’t welcome his questions with exceedingly overwhelming enthusiasm, but as Yelena Belova had boldly put it; it would be exposure therapy.
On the second last page, the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. The selected team bottle-necked out with nonchalant expressions, Alexei going to greet his daughter whilst the rest of you dispersed.
Bob caught you trudging alongside Bucky Barnes, your voices low before you split. On queue, you caught Bob’s attention aimed toward you and offered a meek smile that once again didn’t meet your eyes. He stood, file still tucked into the band of his pants. He was going to do it. Bob had to do it.
Feet shuffling, his body felt aflame when it came close to you. The air thickened with a tension that only he was aware of. Bob was so concentrated on achieving a subtle beeline to you, that his brain stopped sending signals to the movement of his feet, sending him flying across the floor after he tripped over his own foot.
Hands came out to brace the impact, a lot softer than anticipated, Bob looked up to see Alexei who gripped onto the collar of his favoured blue sweater, exposing his midriff and ultimately, the files hidden beneath the fabric.
Curiosity killed the cat and Alexei plucked the folder from Bob’s waistband.
“Now, what do we have here?” Alexei boomed as he held the folder that Bob had pickpocketed from the locked room. Pinched between two fingers, it dangled in front of Bob like bait. Alexei shook it a little and one sheet of paper floated to the floor.
Chaos ensued as Walker, Yelena and Bob went to grab the paper, two for inspection, one for protection. Bob felt Yelena push on him, her teeth grit from the force it took. Walker managed to grab the paper from Yelena’s weakened grasp, his hand crumpled it slightly as he snatched it; grunting as he stood tall with pride.
Bob immediately let Yelena out of his grasp, a protest formed on his lips when Walker smoothed out the page, his brows furrowed as he drank in the contents of the paper.
Blue eyes shot up from the page and to you.
You let out a nervous laugh and set your mug down on the countertop just as Yelena snatched it from Walker and scanned it briefly; her eyes matched John’s to stare at you.
“Have I got something on my face?” Your joke was weak, unnerved by the silence that was met after reading a bit of paper. Anxiety coiled up in your stomach, “Seriously guys, you’re starting to freak me out.”
Yelena plucked the page out, her glance not missing Bob as he cowered in shame when she passed. You watched her with worry as she crossed the gap and extended her hand, the crumpled page flimsy in structure as it exposed its contents to you with ease. Brows pinched, you took the paper and read through it, a flash of realisation crossed your face before it dissolved; replaced with a confident streak.
You huffed a falsified laugh, handing the paper back to Yelena, hands clasped around your mug — Bob not missing the way it shook — as you took a large swig of scolding hot tea, not phased.
“Are you going to explain that?” Walker prodded at your nonchalance.
“There is nothing to explain.” You replied, eyes flicked to Bob for a brief millisecond, “It’s a fake document. Valentina called it some Witness Protection decoy — I don’t know.”
“It’s quite specific.” Yelena added.
“Right. Specific in nonsense.” You slipped off of the barstool, “They’ll come up with anything these days—Bob? Can I speak to you about that Monstera plant you’re taking care of for me? I found some Classical music I’d like you to play it.”
“I don’t, I don’t have a Monstera—”
You spoke with urgency, “Shostakovich’s 11th Symphony.”
Bob didn’t get your reference, but he sensed it had some underlying code word for ‘We need to talk. Now’ and he adhered, muttering about how he did in fact have a Monstera plant and followed you out of the kitchen and into the hallway, where you were quick to yank him into the Cleaners cupboard.
Door slammed shut, you tugged at the light string and Bob jumped at the rage in your face illuminated by the weakened lightbulb above.
“What the fuck are you playing at, Bob?” You seethed in a whisper, your face red hot as you tried to comprehend the implications of your exposed files.
Bob held his hands up in surrender, “I—Yelena said it was exposure therapy. Breaking into Valentina’s office and looking through files.” He watched as your eyes nearly popped out of your skull, “I didn’t know your file was in there!”
“Why did you take it?”
“I don’t know!” Bob pressed the heel of his palms into his eyes. “I—I panicked when I saw that it was you. It felt wrong that anyone else had it aside from you. I was going to give it to you, I promise.”
You stared at him for a long minute. Eyes pinned him to the spot as you sussed his honesty. Bob, from what you had known, was a man of the incapability to lie. To you, that is. Weakened by your presence, in every Timeline, you could disarm the man with a minute long stare and he would fold easily.
Bob shifted from one foot to the other, lips pulled into a thin line as he awaited your response. Awkward under your gaze.
“OK.”
Bob repeated, “OK.”
“This is fine.” You breathed.
Bob nodded for reassurance. “Fine.” He felt himself emphasise the nod, “Could you maybe explain what it means?”
“Oh god, this is not fine!” The palm of your hand slapped to your forehead as panic weaved through your voice. You began to mutter incoherently and Bob tried to reign you back in which only flared your panic more. “You weren’t supposed to find out, Bob. I promised.”
“Promised who? Hey—That doesn’t matter.” Bob shook his head, “Hey, look at me. It’s OK. This is my fault. If you don’t want to explain it, then I can live with that.” You nodded along to Bob’s words, hanging onto every syllable. He smiled genuinely, “You don’t owe me an explanation.”
Your panic soothed, “I will explain it.” That took Bob by surprise as you added, “I can explain it to you.”
“OK. Great.”
“. . . I’m not explaining it in the Cleaners Cupboard, Bob.”
Bob felt his face grow hot, “Yeah, of course. That makes sense.” He caught your eye, “In your room?”
“The kitchen, preferably. I’d rather a neutral ground when I tell you.”
Foreboding. But, Bob respected your request. Head peered out of the Cleaners Cupboard, Bob ensured that the coast was clear before he ushered you out and he watched the back of your frame scarper off to your bedroom, head down as you ignored John Walker speaking directly to you on your way.
Neither of you peeked your heads from your rooms until much later after endless pacing performed by the pair of you, in every square footage of your bedrooms.
The sky grew dark, your ear pressed against the wood of your door as you heard the rest of the team retreat to their rooms for an early night after the escapades on the mission — minus Yelena who still went to bed early in a sulk. Once you had heard Ava’s door click shut, your door swung open at the same time as Bob’s; the pair of you warmed with embarrassment.
“Tea?” You offered once you had reached the kitchen in hushed tones and tip-toes.
Bob sat at the counter, ankles crossed as he tapped his index fingers against the marbled surface.
“No. Thanks.” He declined, his head crammed full with an abundance of questions to ask you. Tea was last on his list of priorities.
Once finished with your brew, the chair scraped against the flooring next to Bob and you took your perched with a weak smile — this is the longest you had spent within close proximity of Bob Reynolds.
It felt unnatural.
“Where do I even start?” You asked rhetorically, breaking the silence and Bob was quick to respond with ‘The beginning.’ with attentive wide eyes. Chest constricted with the weight of your woes, you exhaled and began your explanation, “OK. I suppose you read a lot of the—my files?” Bob nodded, “To water it down, the TVA, Time Variance Authority, preserve what they call the Sacred Timeline. There is one designated Timeline that exists and, on the occasion that it alternates, they enforce arrests and erasure of that said branched timeline for restoration purposes.”
You continued, “Something happened to me, that was viewed as a threat to the Sacred Timeline, and the next thing I know, people armed to the teeth appeared through a portal and took me with them where I was arrested on the charge of a sequence violation.”
“Which was?” Bob encouraged.
“Which was, after the Blip, I had found a company that could wipe memories. Wonder Inc. The Blip haunted me for years after. There was this impending doom that it would happen again, and I desperately wanted to erase those five years.” You paused as Bob slid your mug of hot tea toward you, “I went in, they made me sign a waiver and next thing I knew, the Blip never happened in my head. I came home—bang—TVA were in the house and I was taken away. From my life. And, from you.”
“I have spent years in this endless cycle with the TVA. They took my life away from me and I have chased it back down to where they can’t find me.” It was tedious to explain, but you maintained for Bob’s sake more than anything.
Bob cleared his throat, his heart thumping in his chest, “When you say your life, do you mean—” He gestured between you two and you nodded with a wince. Bob hummed his attention drifting beyond the existence between the pair of you, in the kitchen of the Watchtower at two in the morning.
It was a lot to digest. Even having read the pages — front to back — within your file. It seemed more palatable to Bob when he could read it in black and white. As if it were some conjured up fantasy that stretched beyond the limitations of his own imagination. There you were, explicitly beautiful under the warmth of the candlelight, mapping out a scenario that was far fetched but Bob drank every word you spoke dry.
There had been a life. You and Bob. Intertwined in a daily life and more to the point in love from what Bob assumed. It made his head spin as the steam from the tea you had made him made his face perspire. At least, that’s what he put it down to.
He was brought back when you waved a hand in front of his face. Features expressed concern, a little regret for unfolding a complex situation on a staggering level.
“We can leave it there.” You mumbled and Bob was quick to jump to your defence, his hands reached for yours in a plea, warmth spread through your body from his touch; as if you had been shocked.
“Please.” He almost begged, “I want to hear it.”
“OK. . .” You scratched your brow bone with your thumbnail, “Cruelly, they showed me tapes of my life from the Sacred Timeline, my What If. I was told that, in every lifetime, we are thread together. Defined as soulmates in the entirety of the universe. Every Variant of me, has a Variant of you.”
“Really?”
“We were—are Clownfish in one reality.” You shrugged, “Lifelong mates, with our first batch of eggs. They pruned me, and, well I suppose you’re having to raise a bunch of kids.” You blew into your hot mug of tea with a casualness that brought wonder to Bob. Actually; you sounded insane.
A memory bubbled to the front of his thoughts, “Is that why you got me that Clownfish mug for that holiday?”
“Yes.” As if you sensed his thoughts, you added, “This can all remain hypothetical to you.”
“How many, uh, Timelines, did you—did you go through to find this one?” He ignored your remark. He didn’t want to run on hypothesis. You held five fingers up and Bob swallowed, “And, how did you know this one would work?”
You kissed your teeth, “I didn’t.”
“But, this is as far as you’ve gotten to get back to. . . Me?” Bob pulled at his earlobe.
“Yes.” You leant back in your seat, “I guess — my idea is — there’s been no physical intimacy between us and that means we haven’t branched from the Sacred Timeline. Because, from what I’ve been shown, whenever one of my Variants has kissed you, the screens of the TVA almost blow out.”
Bob could feel himself sweat.
“Oh.” Kissed. You and him. Kissing.
The delicate subject thickened the air and you tapped at the ceramic of your mug, “Which is great news for you. You don’t have to kiss me—Yay!”
“Yay.” Bob stuttered. Was it great news? A little blurred on that one.
Regret filled your chest.
“On that note. I think I’m going to turn in. You should too after that overload of information.” You dropped from the stool and took your favoured mug to the sink. Bob stared at the back of your head, unable to make himself move from his cemented spot. You turned on your heel with a brow quirked, “Bob? You OK?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m—I’m OK.” He huffed out.
The pair of you said nothing else. A comfortable silence blanketed over your shoulders as you walked in unison through the darkened halls of the Watchtower — muffled snores heard from multiple rooms. Arms bumped as you walked, you let a soft smile grace your features from the relief of being able to finally speak to someone about your precarious circumstances.
You hadn’t anticipated that said person to be the very core of your being. Longed for from a distance, perhaps more cruel now that, plagued with the knowledge of your love in every lifetime; you could never fully pledge yourself to Bob Reynolds on Earth-616.
Hand on your door handle, you heard the faintest of clicks to inform you that your bedroom door was now unlocked. Door creaked open just a crack, your actions halted when Bob’s voice cut through the silent air.
“Hey—” He spoke your name and your heart jumped. You turned to look at him, his hair disheveled and eyes bright under the moonlight tones. Just as you remembered him in every lifetime. Bob continued with your devoted attention, “What did you mean by Shostakovich’s 11th Symphony?”
You let out a laugh, “Oh. It’s a piece of music that has slight restless urgency to it. I needed to speak to you urgently. It just coincided with the whole Classical music punch I threw at you.”
“Right. Smart.” Bob was impressed. His mouth moved before his brain, “Have we ever been Classical music lovers?”
“Goodnight, Bob.”
“OK. Goodnight.”
The pair of you beamed on the other side of your closed doors.
