fuck yeah the bugle

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[splitsider]

John Oliver will host a new weekly comedy show on HBO.

[giggletoffs]

The point is, civil liberties are like dogs, John, we love our own but we get really annoyed when other people’s civil liberties keep shitting on our lawns. And we get really embarrassed when a civil liberty starts humping our trouser leg. And, like dogs, I think Britain could get by without civil liberties, but probably wouldn’t be as happy doing so. So maybe civil liberties actually should be taken to a canal and humanely drowned.

Andy - Episode 21A (via notexactlystealth)

[pippin4242]

I have to say, Andy, I do like the idea of Monty Python featuring on this [UK citizenship] test, because you can learn a lot about the British psyche from the fact that we love them so much. Look, you’re gonna be living in a country where we found these men dressed up as ladies, talking in silly voices, slapping each other with fish, and making Kierkegaard jokes - we love them. We love them. If you’re on board with that, you’re more than welcome to sashay in.

John Oliver (via pippin4242)

[thebuglepodcast]

One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.

John Oliver on Vladimir Putin’s criticism of American exceptionalism.

The Bugle Podcast - Episode 246

(via thebuglepodcast)

[acenouie-deactivated20160512]

The response to the speech has not been entirely positive, especially anywhere other than selected parts of Britain. The UK Independence Party, the inexplicably and depressingly influential political party… were generally pleased with the announcement but only wished that the referendum could have come sooner, and also could have come with a side order of a massive war with the French, saying, “It’s been too long, it’s just been far too long. What is the point of having this longbow unless I’m going to fire it at some baguette-chomping Frenchies?”

John Oliver, The Bugle Episode 221 (via johnolivr)

[fuckyeahthebugle]

The Bugle on the 2008 Olympics in Beijing (Episode 22)

John: I don't know, Andy, where this idea of the Olympics being the apex of everything that is good in the world came from. Historically, it has been a parade of doped up athletes with bulging eyes running around a track faster than is natural, as 7 year old Russian gymnasts are threatened with beatings if they fall off a pommel horse. Let's remember, the Olympics were never synonymous with human rights, they began as essentially a nude wrestling competition, from which women were banned as spectators upon pain of death.

Andy: Was that so wrong? Would the Olympics be worse if that was brought back in?

John: I'm not making a judgement call on it, I'm just saying - if you're gonna claim it's about human rights, that's a false claim. Ask the ladies. Well you can't, they're not there. I mean, some argue that the Olympics should be left alone, as they will allow people to see China, maybe in a different way or even for the first time, and will increase the pressure on China to improve their human rights record. And of course, the Olympics taking place at all can do a lot of good for human rights. Just look at Berlin in 1936 - Germany really cleaned up its act after those games.

Andy: Just imagine how bad it would have been if they hadn't had those games, John. That actually kept a lid on things for a few years.

[agentsex]

This is the episode that got me hooked on The Bugle.

[benbell]

John Oliver and Andy Zaltzman work their satirical magic on the recent Syria developments.  And a little bit of sanity has returned to my brain.

[giggletoffs]

And cloning though, John, is one of those trigger words that provokes ill-informed knees to jerk around like the headless chickens it promises to produce - kind of like ‘nuclear power’ and ‘immigration’. But I’m a bit worried, you know: we’ve seen what happens in films with cloning - today they clone meat, tomorrow they’ll clone Hitler. And I, for one, do not want to have to eat cloned Hitler, not even if they’re free-range Hitlers. In fact, especially not if they’re free-range Hitlers, because they, in fact, are the most dangerous type. If only Hitler himself had been battery farmed, the world would be a much happier place today.

Andy Zaltzman on cloned meat - The Bugle - Episode 16 (via notexactlystealth)

[the9th-deactivated20190207]

A research study from Essex University claimed that British people are becoming less honest and that the entire nation might be headed for integrity crisis. An integrity crisis. Do we, historically, have any integrity left to have a crisis over? Did we not tap out our integrity well around the time we started the slave trade? Is it possible to have any integrity to lose after that, or did that well just naturally fill up again after we heroically stopped the slavery that we’d started?

The Bugle - 180 (via the9th)

[wisteriafic]

Cheney, Pelosi and Kerry throw their opinions around on Syria, whilst the UK parliament withdraws from public like into a world of internet porn. Plus, Andy learns what ‘twerking’ is.

I am optimistic about any Bugle episode with a summary containing "Andy learns what ‘twerking’ is." (Oh, and if you loved John Oliver on TDS, you absolutely must become a Bugle fan! It’s my favorite show, and that includes TV.)

[windandwater]

I love the Bugle but it is really dangerous to listen to if I’m not 100% paying attention because sometimes I just space out a little and the next thing I know Andy is saying shit like this:

And if they can’t afford pens, they can draw in the blood of a dying city. Alternatively, just get a room full of monkeys and typewriters.

And I have no idea what’s going on.

(Bugle 243)

[banjaxed]

It’s damn good stuff

[crucial-waukesha-county]

Anyway, on the way out of the shop I bumped into my girlfriend - lovely lass she was, terrific girl, great to see her again. We got chatting, reminiscing about the old times, and I gave her a multiple choice quiz question about what her favourite part of my body was. She looked so pretty. She thought of it, looking me over from top to bottom. Her eyes went down - down a bit further - then down disappointingly far and down a bit more. Then, my great ex picked A. Shins.

the best worst pun i’ve ever seen (via humiliatethehost)

[wisteriafic]

Visit Original Link

Robert Mugabe is going nowhere without a struggle, especially when he still gets 103% of the vote. Plus, Silvio Berlusconi is back in the news! Thanks Silvio!

So. Tonight on TDS, John Oliver snarked about Putin and Berlusconi. When he got to the last leader, I was chanting “Mugabe!”, but alas, ‘twas Cameron.  Even so, tonight was the closest he’s come this summer to just ditching the whole Jon Stewart Replacement thing and going Full Bugle. All we needed was a ridiculous ginger punner, and my bliss would’ve been complete.

(Good lord, I love The Bugle. It truly is my favorite show — and that includes TV.)

[fuckyeahthebugle]

radiochris replied to your post: “Dude. They don't censor the word 'cock.' You can hear J...”

I think you should all have a fight.

Bring it

[fuckyeahthebugle]

Where can I find the very first bugle?

Right here!