Fullmoondust

- Morgenschwärze - My Life - Blackbook

[fullmoondust]

„There is no more hope for me.“

- Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

Its like drowning. You can‘t breathe. You can‘t rescue yourself. The water is everywhere and there is no escape.

[fullmoondust]

„Do you think this pain will end when we die?“

- Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

I feel so damn lost.

[fullmoondust]

Everything feels so heavy right now.

I don‘t want you to tell whats going inside my head because i think i‘m strong enough to handle it alone.

I‘m not. I‘m not strong. I‘m a mess.

I don‘t want to tell you because i don‘t want to burden you.

I don‘t want to tell you because maybe it will be too much for you.

I don‘t want to loose you.

So I sit here, alone, crying and wanting to cut myself.

[fullmoondust]

„The tears are burning on my skin.“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„I hurt you. And I‘m sorry. But I can‘t do that anymore. I will only hurt you more and more. I guess leaving is the only right decision. So maybe everything will be fine again. With your friends, with your life, with your soul and with your heart. I never thought it would hurt this much to let you go. But it does. It feels like drowning. But that‘s okay, because I know you‘ll do better without me. And maybe one day I can breathe again. Maybe I will get better too. Maybe one day I can be happy again. Now I don‘t even know what it feels like to be good. I hurt myself with this love, so I need to go and maybe one day you will understand this. I loved you. And I still do. Always remember that. There was too much going wrong and everything is my fault. I‘m sorry that I can‘t be the girl you wanted me to be. I‘m sorry that I‘m not enough. I made mistakes. But trust me when I say you will be good. I will always be with you. Even if I‘m not here anymore. You deserve so much better. I‘m sorry for wasting you time. I‘m sorry that I can‘t love you the way I should love you. I‘m sorry for being complicated. I‘m sorry I hurt you.“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„And I guess if I leave everything will be fine.“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„Life is like the waves. There are always ups and downs. You need to deal with it.“

- Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„Du hast mir sogar ein Lied geschrieben, doch ich lieb‘ einen and’ren.“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„You broke me. Now I‘ll fix myself and will end the chapter with you. Now and forever.“

— Fullmoondust // 15.12 - Now I‘ll learn to live again

[morgenschwaerze]

„I love you so much. And you always say my jealousy is unnecessary. But it isn’t. I’m afraid to lose you. I need you and without you I‘m nothing. I fear that you’ll leave me like the rest did. I love you more than anything else. If I lose you, I‘ll lose myself.“

- Morgenschwärze

[morgenschwaerze]

„I hate my life so much. The only thing I want is to die. But you give me a reason to stay. You are my only reason. So I‘ll stand by your side till the end. Because I promised you to stay. When you‘re gone so I‘ll go and there‘s nothing holding me back.“

[fullmoondust]

„You remind me that my heart is still alive because every time you come home it beats so hard it brings me back to life“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„Cause everything you know will turn to dust one day. That‘s why it‘s hard for me to love. Because I know someday it will disapear.“

— Fullmoondust

[fullmoondust]

„If you are cold people can‘t hurt you. If you pretend to be cold they may hurt you but they don‘t know they can. So they have no power over you“

— Morgenschwärze // Fullmoondust

10. Mai 2019

[fullmoondust]

„First you need to fix yourself, then you can care about other people“

— Morgenschwärze // Fullmoondust

10. Mai 2019