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@fymichaelgove
Farmers hearing a Michael Gove speech last week missed a cheeky jibe at Theresa May’s comment that ‘running through fields of wheat’ was the naughtiest thing she had done.
Tucked away in Gove’s speech was this: ‘We don’t want everyone walking through fields of wheat, it may connect us to the countryside but it’s not always right on farmland.’
But even that was as nothing compared with the surprise I got on Sunday, when I called my husband — only to find him not in his constituency, as I had expected, but somewhere else entirely. I knew the second he answered that something was afoot. Instead of his Wife Voice (a cheery ‘Hallooo!’) he was using his Serious Voice, an altogether more muted affair. ‘Where on earth are you?’ I said, suddenly worried something bad had happened. ‘I’m sitting in No 10 with a very nice private secretary,’ he said, switching to his I-Can’t-Talk-Now Voice. ‘Oh,’ I said. ‘Quite,’ he said. ‘I’ll call you back then,’ I said. ‘Good idea,’ he said.
June 13, 2017
My husband was famously ill-suited to the job of government chief whip — something he cheerfully admits. Now I see why: his choice of pet. The current chief whip, Gavin Williamson, has a tarantula called Cronus (named after the Greek Titan god who castrated his father and ate his sons), which sits in a glass cage on his desk, terrifying the life out of erring MPs. Michael, poor fellow, had to make do with our Bichon Frise, Snowy. About as frightening as a feather duster.
Sarah Vine in the DailyMail; November 30, 2016
It is also the case that you don’t necessarily realise you are there. Thus when, after the result on June 24, the entire world turned its beady eye on our front door, I must confess I really wasn’t ready for it. There is something curiously surreal about the way the momentous combines with the mundane. The Press may be outside the window, blocking the street with their vans and cameras, your house may be on Sky TV; but you’re just two people waking up in bed, bleary-eyed and exhausted. One of you makes the tea while the other takes a shower. One of the children can’t find their school shoes, the other is howling because they’ve lost their history book, and to add to the chaos the dogs are barking like maniacs because reporters keep knocking on the door. The dishwasher needs unloading, the bin needs emptying. Outside, everyone is imagining it’s TV’s West Wing or House Of Cards. In fact, it’s more like Terry And June crossed with Outnumbered.
Daily Mail; Dec 28, 2016
Yes, it’s lovely to have him around, fully plugged in to family life. But it can be mightily irritating, too, since he has now brought the zeal and ruthless efficiency with which he sought to reform government into our domestic arena. Still, at least I now have very tidy kitchen drawers and we never run out of loo paper — so I suppose I shouldn’t complain.
Daily Mail; Dec 28, 2016
Michael Gove (Surrey Heath) (Con): I should declare an interest as a driver—albeit not a very good one—of a Nissan Qashqai. [...] can my right hon. Friend explain why Opposition Members will not take yes for an answer? Was Oscar Wilde not right that there is only one thing worse than not getting one’s heart’s desire and that is getting it?
Mr Speaker: Order. The Secretary of State has no responsibility either for Opposition policy or for Oscar Wilde—although we always enjoy the poetic licence of the right hon. Member for Surrey Heath (Michael Gove).
Clive Efford: Last week, the Chancellor adopted Labour policy on fiscal investment to stimulate the economy. This week, the Secretary of State is adopting Labour policy on worker representation on boards— [Interruption]
Michael Gove: Come over!
Clive Efford: No, you’re coming over here I’m afraid.
Several hon. Members: rose—
Mr Speaker: I observe in passing that there is an undiluted sea of men seeking to catch the eye of the Chair. If a female Member were to stand, she would be called, but at the moment she is not, so she will not.
Victoria Atkins: rose—
Mr Speaker: If that was a serious bid, I call Victoria Atkins.
Hon. Members: Hear, hear!
Victoria Atkins: [asks her question]
Mr Speaker: She is not a barrister for nothing.
Mr Speaker: Ah, young Gove. Where is the fellow? [...] It is an indescribable delight to see the right hon. Member for Surrey Heath (Michael Gove). My surprise was merely at the fact that he has perambulated to a different part of the Chamber from that which he ordinarily inhabits. I am sure that we will enjoy the same eloquence as usual.
Michael Gove: Thank you very much, Mr Speaker. As a migratory species, I am glad that you have noticed the different habitat that I am now in.
I confess, I’ve fallen head over heels for Ed Balls Last week the Mail on Sunday reported the rumour that a former minister, who’d been a prominent Leave campaigner, had shocked his wife by falling in love with a married man. The paper said the allegation, while widely peddled, was untrue. I’m afraid they were wrong. The rumour is true. The ex-minister is me. I and my family are having to adjust to a new turn my life has taken. Against my better judgment, against all my past inclinations, I have developed an infatuation with another man.
Times; October 28, 2016
Michael Gove (Surrey Heath) (Con): My right hon. Friend understandably draws attention to the apparently contested views on the contestable fund of my right hon. Friends the Members for Maldon (Mr Whittingdale) and for Wantage (Mr Vaizey), but the truth is that those views—like BBC1 and BBC2, or like Radio 6 Music and Radio 1—are in fact complementary. Yes, there is a slight difference between them, but they reinforce the overall thrust and wisdom of the reforms that, together, my right hon. Friends introduced and that, I think, are applauded across the House.
Matt Hancock: I would love to say I agree with my right hon. Friend, but he obviously missed those exchanges, because there really was quite a lot of distance between my two right hon. Friends.
Michael Gove (Surrey Heath) (Con): My right hon. Friend will be aware that sometimes it is very important to pay attention to the liberal elite. He will be aware that, on referendum night, we were told
“I will forgive no one who does not respect the sovereign voice of the British people once it has spoken whether it is a majority of 1% or 20%...When the British people have spoken you do what they command…Either you believe in democracy or you don’t.”
Those are the words of Lord Ashdown of Norton-sub-Hamdon in the district of the Yeovil in the county of Somerset, who is the most elitist liberal I know, which is saying something.
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Mr Davis: The liberal my right hon. Friend mentions is the mentor of my favourite liberal. I have to tell my right hon. Friend that I consider myself to be a liberal Conservative, so I am not entirely sure that I accept his characterisation of the liberal elite, but I take his point that the referendum was the biggest mandate given to a British Government ever. It is our job to carry it out and we will not allow it to be thwarted.
I lost count of the number of times Michael would walk through the door on the cusp of midnight in a state of advanced agitation. And nine times out of ten, it would not be out of exhaustion (the man has an uncanny energy when it comes to policy submissions), but something far more energy-sapping: frustration.
Daily Mail; October 19, 2016
Saucy comments about newly bearded Michael Gove’s, ahem, profile in shorts are not first time he has been involved in below-the-belt speculation. A young Gove once enraged Mick Jagger by joking about his tackle after they stood next to each other at a urinal at an Oxford University event. When Gove asked for a lift back to London, Jagger snarled: ‘In the f****** boot.’ And Gove’s wife Sarah says: ‘It wasn’t Michael’s big heart that first attracted me.’ ________________________________________________ Dog's item last week about Michael Gove's 'trouser profile' – wife Sarah says she did not marry him for his 'big heart' – has jogged the memory of a pal of ex-journo Gove on The Times newspaper. Posing for a group photograph on a freezing winter's day, Gove told the snapper: 'Hurry up, it's so cold my **** has shrunk all the way up to my knee.'
Black Dog for the Daily Mail on August 21, 2016 and August 27, 2016
'Tis the season of the holiday beard. Everywhere, normally clean-shaven gentlemen are letting their facial hair grow wild and free as they relax their regimes. I know a certain ex-minister who is very much enjoying his new hipster look.
Sarah Vine for the Daily Mail; 2016, August 17
Chair: Would you like to apologise for the design and technology first draft and say that the second is going to be much better?
Michael Gove: I do not think that we should apologise. I hope that the new draft will be better, but we are so close to Christmas now that it would be wrong for me to unwrap the present prematurely.
Michael Gove: On GCSEs, at the end of June we should be able to have a consultation on subject content, and that should be agreed, I hope, by the autumn.
Chair: Is this the stuff that was originally going to be done by May, which became in May, then in June and is now, according to you today, the end of June? Is that the same thing?
Michael Gove: I am saying the end of June; I hope it will be earlier in June, but June, yes.
Chair: Definitely June?
Michael Gove: Definitely June.