[bemybaebaebae]

Hongseok

[minzbins-moved]

Summer in Tokyo 😎

[gantzxkms]

Wrapped - Kwangmin

There was a relaxing calm he felt, though he was unsure of his exact placement. For a brief moment, he didn't move on from it. Kwangmin had been stressed and traumatized since this whole experience began, so this peace he had he would hold. He knew eventually it had to pass, there were more important, more pressing things to attend to. With great reluctance, he slowly opened his eyes. There was a pressure on his head and sitting up he felt his head knowing he had gauze wrapped around it. His ears were pressed snug, mufflinig his hearing a bit. "Take it easy there, you almost us back there." The Asshole was speaking to him. Kwangmin just stared at them, unsure if he should genuinely believe them. This was a person that tried to kill him and Siheon, so their words couldn't be truly trusted. "Did I hurt anyone?" he asked. "No," another voiced answered. He glanced at their name tag Jiho. "We got to get to class," he replied, then "Thank you." there was a wave of relief in that. Kwangmin may be a lot of things, but needlessly hurting people wasn't part of his character. He got up from the table, slightly wavering. Even with the damage to his head, he kept his mind on the mission. Given his profession, it was easy for Kwangmin to act like everything was fine when it really wasn't. The whiplash would hit him later just like the last mission causing him to withdraw to silently come to terms to whatever it was then bounce back and move forward. Unbeknownst to him, the other players took a vote to keep an eye on him given his erratic behavior. That person ended up being Jiho. The 28+ age group was small but suffered the least deaths so far. It was obvious Kwangmin was the unofficial leader, so for him not only pull his gun out but actually fire it meant that right now he wasn't in the best mind to lead. Bully would take over leadership for now they did have the most experience out of everyone. Before any of then exited the room, 3 pieces of paper were slipped under the door. Bully took them and after reading it gave 1 to each of them. "Nurse Pass" was all it said. Guess this was there save for missing class. Bully went on ahead leaving the 2 of them. The school was quiet now, a stark change from earlier. "Do you remember how you died?" he asked her, glancing over. It was brief, but any emotion drained out of her before the question was flipped back on with a "Do you?" Kwangmins answer was silence, he wasn't exactly sure, but he was sure he was stabbed giving how fast he bled out. By the time he registered the pain, it was too late. He didn't even see the person's face because the damn lights went out. The city did have irregular blackout over the past few months. The gears in his mind were starting to turn but stopped upon reaching the classroom. Part of him was scared to see the same image as before, but without his gun what could he do? JJiho slide the door open and everything looked normal as it could be. Everyone was busy on the assignment. Kwangmin and Jiho placed their nurse pass on the teachers' desk then took their seats getting to work.

[gantzxkms]

Unwanted - Kwangmin

Trigger Warning: Body horror

Frustrated was an understatement; Kwangmin had expressed his honest feelings to the one person he trusted, and they seemed distant. How was he supposed to proceed now? Siheon had his own plan, which was fine, but the goal shouldn't be to send someone into danger. Gantz was unforgiving about death, so it was better to be cautious. How far should he step to prevent Joel from going? Was he a leader or not? It wasn't necessary for everyone to pin the title on him, and when he took on the role, his position was minimized.

Though Gantz was a game, it was a mirror of the real world. Power dynamics, personal gain, and self-preservation were all showing up in full force. Kwangmin hated how people could be so self-centered, but he wasn't above having that trait as well. He was human, and in today's time, you had to look out for yourself first. His profession was cutthroat, with the top position only having limited openings, yet thousands of people applied for the prestige of the title. The money allowed for financial stability, yet the long hours took a toll.

Kwangmin's parents weren't satisfied with his career choice, but who was the one working 12+ hours dealing with high-ups, the general public, licensing boards, etc.? It was him and where he was, and though stressful, it was manageable. Being a doctor still carried a lot of social credit, but going to the top wasn't worth it for him. He was still able to enjoy his interests and have some personal time despite the hours. Sincerely, thinking about his life outside of Gantz was a comfort. It was real, not fake like this place. The false sense of security caused by the setting had a grip on some of the players. Though Kwangmin went along, his awareness allowed him to stay alert. It was unsettling how he walked to the top floor when no one was around; I guess no one was willing to explore.

He had just set foot on the tile floor when the bell rang, yet it was a high, piercing screech. Kwangmin covered his ears, looking at the source, yet the sound grew louder. Moving away didn't help either, creating a rise and fall of the volume as if his inner ear was being repeatedly stabbed. His walk was stubbed and his balance thrown off, but he tried to remain focused. Kwangmin opened the classroom door with everyone's eyes fixated on him. What set the man into a panic was how huge their eyes were, like they were glued to their faces. The most terrifying of all were the Bully's, whose bodies enlarged and towered over everyone else. The room was instantly hot, causing Kwangmin to sweat profusely. A sinister grin appeared on the bully's face, which the others copied.

The level of fear in him was unbearable; it was like he was dying again, but this time every sensation registered doom. His hand shook vigorously, reaching for his gun. His vision was blurring due to the stress and panic, and taking the best aim he could, he shot at the Bully.

[nukua-deactivated20121023]

[salt-gifs]

[gantzxkms]

gantzxsiheon​:

KWANGMIN:​

Siheon was right, but the looming doom didn’t seem to smother him like it did Kwangmin. Honestly was it fair to shift the responsibility or at least the expectation for him to be the leader when he was working under the same circumstances as everyone else. He could’ve just left everyone to fend for themselves because he had enough (of something) within him to pull through this and survive. The person he was with now proved the same was true for them. They were the best shot for everyone’s survival… “Babes? You really want people to think we’re dating?” he asked on impulse then shook his head, “Nevermind, before school spirit no. The floor is split with a lounge in the middle, classroom on one side and a lab/kitchen on the other. We stayed in groups of two and cleaned.” He was curious to know if they did find anything, “If that’s the case then we really are alone, did you find anything there? Though he might have a death wish, we shouldn’t provoke him into dying. Gantz said that was a place you didn’t want to go.”  Kwangmin did have some trust in Gantz since they knew more than everyone but seemed unreliable given the last mission. They seem to give enough warnings on some dangers to avoid but if not listened then the result was on you. He was thrown off by the kids comment but didn’t let it show, “The class president idea might work, they do have the power to stop the bullies but it shouldn’t be a rigged. I can campaign but whoever wins the 1st goal is to stop the bullies.” He reasoned to the other as he paced back and forth. “Wait a minute remember that cat!? Did you seen them in the building?” With everything going on Kwangmin nearly forgot about, besides the players and the bullies, the cat was the only other living thing at the school.

pursing his lips, siheon folds his arms over his chest, posture becoming defensive and closed off. “sorry, kwangmin-ssi.” for a respectful honourific, he sure spat it with as much venom as he could muster. “i didn’t realise that me using a dumb nickname during our secret bathroom rendezvous would give people the wrong idea. how silly of me.” as if anyone besides joel gave enough of a shit to even notice or care, but hey, if the thought was that off-putting to the other… sure.

“gantz said that we shouldn’t want to go, which is exactly why we need to send someone. i didn’t get a chance to ask him about it, but i’m sure he won’t say no.” even if siheon has to demean himself by giving in to joel’s desire to be called oppa to do it. he’s hopeful that taewoo will make it happen before he has to.

he does, however, dodge the question about what he and taewoo had found, instead taking one last drag off his vape before putting it away again. “we shouldn’t split the vote. there’s no reason for any of us to campaign against taewoo, that just makes things unnecessarily complicated.” especially kwangmin, who already has a rapport with some of these players. “that’s why i’m not going to run, even though i literally already know how to be class president.”

it’s becoming a weird trend that someone asks siheon about something he didn’t even see because he had been otherwise occupied, as the cat had been around presumably whenever joel had siheon distracted, given that taewoo and kwangmin had both seen it, and siheon had not. “we didn’t see anyone, no. not even other players, it was a ghost town over there.”

His stand-off behavior was starting to get to him, yes it was early in the morning and the stress of this situation wasn’t letting up despite a break between the missions. Maybe for this mission he should just go solo. Siheon had a team and a plan before this talk, so he could handle his own. Kwangmin was blindsided by the other’s cold nature, out of everyone he truste him the most. Sure they had their arguments but was either of them really at fault!? It almost didn’t make sense how they beat the last mission. He didn’t bring up the fact everyone had to make a campign poster regardless of the vote. Maybe Gantz was trying to see something.   “That’s sound reasoning, but he’s better off alive. . .or close to it than dead.” he spoke, “Well rally the students to vote for him then with your experience. I can’t speak for everyone but most of the players I saw stayed in this building. What they were doing I can’t say.” The older man felt Siheon wasn’t trusting him but for the sake of peace he didn’t bring it up. He didn’t have time to dwell on it either because right now the focus should be on the mission at hand. “Let’s aim to have Taewoo as president by dinner. Who’s to stay the clock won’t freeze again.” He didn’t wait for the other to reply or even agree to it. Seemed like he wasn’t much in the mood to talk anyways. Kwangmin walked towards him, he was blocking the door anyways. There was a brief pause like he should say SOMETHING but didn’t and left. 

[gantzxkms]

gantzxsiheon​:

as they head into the hallway, and then into the bathroom, siheon uses the moment to try to figure out what it is about kwangmin’s name that had sounded so familiar. he’s sure he doesn’t know the man outside of the context of gantz - he’d be hard-pressed to forget meeting someone like kwangmin - but he’s seen that name somewhere before…

while kwangmin is checking the stalls, siheon decides to use his vape quickly, having not done so in a few hours. as he rummages through his bag, however, his hand brushes the tablet, and the lightbulb over his head goes off. 

that weird distorted text on the bestiary… and now he’s alone in a secluded location with him. great! real fuckin’ smart, siheon.

staying closer to the door, siheon tries to look casual, leaning against the wall and taking a drag from his vape, holding it in his chest until it starts to burn in the hopes that will help calm his frayed nerves. he’s not sure why kwangmin would be considered one of the enemies in the eyes of the game, but he doesn’t want to find out, either. playing with his tongue ring absently, siheon considers kwangmin’s revelation - though it’s a stretch to call it as much.

“babes, i thought it was obvious that something bigger was at play here? this whole place is like, textbook wolf in sheep’s clothing. we’ve been here for hours, and nothing’s happened yet. hell, taewoo and i broke into the administration building, and literally no one noticed.” he wrinkles his nose as kwangmin eats, a knee-jerk reaction more than anything else. “we’re gonna see if joel’s down to go check out detention, since he seems like he has a death wish, and i’m gonna help taewoo get elected to class president, but that’s the only plans we’ve made so far.” pushing off the wall, siheon takes another drag from his vape, as defiant as he dares, given the circumstances. “not bad for kids, huh?”

it honestly takes him a moment to decide whether or not he should bring up the tablet - the information about the bullies might be helpful for kwangmin to know, but scroll too far down… well, siheon just has to hope he can run faster than kwangmin can, if it all goes south.

he decides to see what kwangmin already knows, instead. “did you find anything before school spirit?”

Siheon was right, but the looming doom didn’t seem to smother him like it did Kwangmin. Honestly was it fair to shift the responsibility or t least the expecation for him to be the leader when he was working under the same circumstances as everyone else. He could’ve just left everyone to fend for themselves because he had enough (of something) within him to pull through this and survive. The person he was with now proved the same was true for them. They were the best shot for everyone’s survival. . . “Babes? You really want people to think we’re dating?” he asked on impulse then shook his head, “Nevermind, before school spirit no. The floor is split with a lounge in the middle, classrooom on one side and a lab/kitchen on the other. We stayed in groups of two and cleaned.” He was curious to know if they did find anything, “If that’s the case then we really are alone, did you find anything there? Though he might have a death wish, we shouldn’t provoke him into dying. Gantz said that was a place you didn’t want to go.”  Kwangmin did have some trust in Gantz since they knew moore than everyone but seemed unreliable given the last mission. They seem to give enough warnings on some dangers to avoid but if not listened then the result was on you. He was thrown off by the kids comment but didn’t let it show, “The class president idea might work, they do have the power to stop the bullies but it shouldn’t be a rigged. I can campaign but whoever wins the 1st goal is to stop the bullies.” He reasoned to the other as he paced back and forth. “Wait a minute remember that cat!? Did you seen them in the building?” With everything going on Kwangmin nearly forgot about, besides the players and the bullies, the cat was the only other living thing at the school.

[gantzxkms]

gantzxsiheon​:

looking up as someone approaches the table, siheon blinks in surprise at kwangmin’s sudden arrival. after the… rocky start they’d had in the last mission, kwangmin’s unwarranted comment about him being some dumb kid still smarting, he hadn’t honestly expected to see the other again until absolutely necessary. then again, it was inevitable that kwangmin would seek him out again, or the other way around, despite whatever had happened in the maze, given that they both seemed to be some of the only ones capable of stringing thoughts together around here.

oh, shit, wait-! realising his opportunity, siheon’s gaze slides down to the name tag each of them were wearing as a part of the uniform, finally solving a mystery fifteen hours in the making.

shin kwangmin. why does that sound… 

brow furrowing in confusion, siheon looks back up to kwangmin’s face instead, filing that away for later in favour of trying to figure out what could possibly be so urgent. “right now?”

beside him, joel scoffs, but as soon as he opens his mouth to make what siheon is sure is about to be a smartass comment referring back to their conversation before the mission had started, siheon elbows him, hard. “i didn’t even say anything!” joel protests, whining at siheon.

“you didn’t have to.” siheon shrugs. “try not to eat taewoo or anything while i’m gone, yeah? we still need him.”

“yeah, yeah.” joel waves siheon off as the other rises from the table, gathering the tablet and putting it back in his bag. he hadn’t been eating, or anything, so it was relatively easy to abandon the other two at the table, not missing joel sliding into his abandoned seat to sit beside taewoo instead as soon as he does. poor guy.

“have fun with your boyfr-ow!” joel pouts, rubbing the back of his head, where siheon had smacked him. “you should talk to someone about your anger issues, you know that, honey?”

siheon ignores him other than rolling his eyes, gesturing for kwangmin to follow him back out into the hallway outside the cafeteria. “how private is private? i don’t think anyone’s listening out here, but we can head down that way, if you want?” he gestures back towards the stairs, out of earshot of any prying ears from the cafeteria.

if there was anyone that Kwangmin trusted it ws Siheon. sure they had heated moments but when it really mattered they could out their egos aside to get the job done. The older was aware most of the other players looked to him as the leader.. . though it was something he didn't want. However it was for the betterment of everyone there was someone who could lead because truth be tols the last mission would've had more deaths for not him and Siheon. He did ignore the guy's tease about him being Siheon's boyfriien. They didn't know each other like THAT. This was not the siution for romance anyways.

Even with no teachers around the hallway would've been a good choice but still who was to say someone was lurking around the corner? Kwangmin motioned to a near by bathroom. it was the most private without going to a random classroom. It was vest to not push luck too far since the schedule was to be followed. Still the fact Siheon was thinking about blindspots was a sign he aware of his surroundings. Once inside the bathroom, he checked each stall to make sure they were truly alone.

"I don't think this is an easy mission. . . it's just a gut feeling." Kwangmin started, "I had this feeling before I got really acrewed over and never felt that way again until now. There's more going on here than we're seeing. I didn't want to say it in front of everyone because it could start a panic."I don't know what you did for school spirit, but 4th year watch this propaganda video about how this school is so great but all that praise felt like a cover up. . . " he paused taking a bite of the apple, "Think about it, which school idn't have issues with bullying and sometimes it was crazy shit. A school president is missing and we have thoose bullies still here. Someohing isn't adding up."

[eatpussypraylove]

[gantzxkms]

gantzxsiheon​:

“i’m gonna like, hurl. how can you eat that?” siheon makes a pained expression, watching joel eat the… whatever that is that they’re trying to pass off as breakfast. 

the other merely shrugs, not even bothering to swallow before speaking. “you’d like it, i think. it’s seafood.”

“seafood, what- ew!” siheon recoils away from joel, leaning towards taewoo - behind him as he faces the other - a little scandalised, but mostly disgusted, as the other sticks his tongue out at him.

“see? food.” joel laughs, not deterred in the slightest as siheon hits him in the chest, any impact there might’ve been - which probably isn’t a lot, he’s relatively sure, given how tiny they are - dulled by the suit anyway.

“what are you, twelve? that’s so gross, joel.” siheon laughs, despite himself, incredulous this is even the situation he’s found him in. “you’re going to make me a practicing christian again, you know that? i’m going to go back to church just so i can pray for someone to save me from having to deal with you.”

“aw, honey, don’t be like that.” the nickname falls casually from the other despite the fact that they hardly know each other, making siheon roll his eyes, glancing towards taewoo briefly, as if to ask ‘are you hearing him?’.

“don’t honey me, i should take taewoo and go sit somewhere else, leave you here by yourself.”

“but you wooon’t~! ‘cause you like me too much.”

“more like i wouldn’t be able to get rid of you.“ siheon scoffs, turning his attention back to the tablet they’d pilfered from the administration building, even if he’s distracted a moment later to add- “you know, we’ve only known each other for a few hours.”

“so? you’ve only known taewoo and what’s-his-fuck for a few hours too. none of us know each other. though i can’t say i would say no to an opportunity to get to know any of my fellow players.”

exasperated, honey sets the tablet down on the table, seemingly giving up on going through it for the moment. “what do i have to do to get you to shut your mouth and not open it again until breakfast is over? this is a genuine question, i’m being serious.” he regrets as soon as he asks, however, as joel merely grins at him. “not that. don’t be delusional.”

“you don’t even know what i was gonna say!” joel protests, though he doesn’t deny it. “ask me nicely.”

“not this agai- really?”

@gantzxkms​ they’re your problem now

Part of him hoped he was wrong, but his gut feeling did not allow denial to win. They had to end this mission before things took a turn for the worse. This was psychological to get them comfortable then attack. It was hard for him to explain but it reminded him very much of a military exercise. . .

After a combat simulation, the squad “took it easy”, sure they had quality checks, classes, and the like, but for weeks there was no intense training until there was. Kwangmin remembered feeling off like he had better double check he had everything in order. His concern fell on ef ers until 03:00m when they were woken up to the creming commn of their uperior. It was disorientating and chaotic but that was just the start of it. The comfort they had fallen into dulled their redness, affecting their ability to function. Needless to say, the squad failed that exercise, taking it as a lesson to always be ready.

There was a slight ringing in his ear from the announcement that it was breakfast time. Kwangmin assumed all the students wouldn’t pass the opportunity to eat, so he zoomed to the cafeteria. Grabbing a single apple, he scanned the place to look for Siheon, finding at a table with 2 others. From the look of the interactions, they all seem to have bonded. They were in the same class, right!? Kwangmin approached the table looking t the 3 of them. The one sitting next to Siheon looked vaguely familiar but not enough to recall his name or where they had seen each other. The perv er other guy that sat across from them was very animated. He had reservations about him seeing him be playful more than anything else.

“We need to talk . .. privately” he poked at the moment to Siheon then noticed the tablet. Where did he get that? Surely not from his bag, because they should all have 1 then.

[gantzxkms]

Physical Education

Name: S. Kwangmin Year: 4

What sport (school sport or otherwise) does your player train in? Regarding the school sports I lean more towards running outside of that kumdo, tkd, and archery. 

Did they have thoughts about going pro or taking another field like coach, trainer, broadcasting etc? Maybe once or twice did I think about going pro but I think I’m a better fit as a trainer. I’m a private person so being too visible like a celebrity wouldn’t do me any good. Sports boardcasting could be an option too since I know many languages.

How often do they train? I train almost everyday before work or in this case school. It helps me get in the right mindset to deal with whatever happens later. 

Do they supplement their training with anything else? I don’t do anything extra. . .

[gantzxkms]

OH NO - Kwangmin

Compared to the rest of the school. The senior hall was relative quiet. So quiet you could hear a pin drop. The area was split into 2 classrooms, a regular class and a lab/kitchen. With a lounge area in the middle. Kwangmin assumed in last games there wasn't that many players around his age or older. In total there were 5 of them (4 players, 2 women, 2 men and the bully). He and the other players kept their distance, unsure if they would attack unproved. The almost pure black of them was hypnotizing, so it was best to not even look in their direction. Kwangmin did wonder if they could speak since they had no visual facial features, however he could feel when their “eyes” rested on him. It was a chilling feeling of subtle dread, like a predator stalking its prey.

Before classes began, the players did their morning duties of cleaning in pairs. It was a defense against the bully who stayed seated in the lounge area. The other guy was just a year younger than him and seemed well-adjusted to the situation. He wasn’t much of a talker, not like Kwangmin was bothered by that. Once they were all done with the cleaning, they met in the lab and emptied their bags as a group, just in case there was a special item among them. However, it was nothing but regular school supplies. Kwangmin did notice how their items seemed personalized, his were striped with blue tones, one of the women had floral patterns while the other had red zigzag. The other man had a green dot pattern. Maybe it was Gantz trying to bring some normal into the game, or maybe for them to let their guard down.

The bell rang, signaling the start of the day. Kwangmin glanced over the schedule, seeing School Spirit. They wanted for an announcement, but there wasn’t one.

“Maybe we go to the classroom?” one of the women guessed to the group.

Exiting the lab, they didn’t see the lab and went to the window just in case it was an outside activity (it wasn’t). Going into the classroom the Bully was already seated leaving them to fill in the empty seats. The lights dimmed, and a video started to play on the marker board.

“WELCOME TO THE ACADEMY, /THE/ PRIMER HIGH SCHOOL IN THE CITY!!! Educating the best and brightest of tomorrow TODAY.”

The whole video felt like propaganda highlighting how the school was the best, the students and staff were highly motivated, and there were no internal issues or problems at the school. Kwangmin was having déjà vu because it sounded very familiar. He was restless, needing to check in with a certain someone because he had a gut feeling this mission was far more dangerous than it let on. The moment the bell rang for breakfast, he was out the door. . .

[janersm]

Self-advocacy is always a very important aspect of treatment. It can be difficult if you are uncomfortable speaking up for yourself or if you have healthcare professionals who are not listening to you.

[gantzxkms]

Music Questions

Name: S. Kwangmin Year: 4

Do they play an instrument? I play both the piano and guitar, I tried the violin for a few months but quit. 

What is their ability level? I would say I’m a high beginner to intermmediate player for the piano and guitar. Finding the time to practice was easier but as I got older school and other interest took over. Plus I was paying for the lessons myself, but parents didn’t support me wanting or having a career in music. The violin I just know the basics, I quit because the instructor was very demanding.

What is the appeal of the instrument?

Most songs start out with just a piano or guitar so that was the appeal. I wanted a career in music. I like the guitar because it’s easier to carry and it’s a bit easier for me to play. Piano can help me flesh out the songs though it takes me a bit longer to make sense of chords. My parents preferred I play the piano for the prestige of it. That was the extent of their support of me doing music. 

Have they performed for an audience? Many recitals, I entered a few competitions but I wasn’t on a good enough playing level. Plus the energy was off, I’m not concerned about playing perfect but the best of my ability.

[gantzxkms]

Music Playlist

Name: S. Kwangmin

Year: 4

Mariah Carey - Always Be My Baby

Whitney Houston - I’m Your Baby Tonight

Jun.K - No Love

BoA - Only One 

Ken Hirai - Confession

The Gap Band - I’m In Love

Mary J Blige - I’m Going Down

Christina Agurilera - Save Me From Myself

The Legend - Nail

Brandy - Long Distance

Mariah Carey - Circles

[gantzxkms]

Regroup

Back at the safe house Kwangmin withdrew to a corner of the room and laid down. He faced the wall with his back showing to the others hinting for everyone to leave him alone. In his head he was processing the mission they just completed. This was both not real but somehow it wasn’t. Any doubt these games weren’t serious was gone. The pain he felt was real enough and if his will wasn’t strong he was sure he would’ve died because of his injuries.  Gantz didn’t seem that reliable because the issue with the timer didn’t sit right with him. However they? it? did provide with the the suits and gave hints of benefits of the mission. Was Gantz just a player too in this? Kwangmin had questions but couldn’t get answers now. Sitting up for a moment he scanned the room to see a few new players. . . .one of them looked familiar but he had no intention of talking to them.  Kwangmin decided the next game he would play with more strategy if possible than strength. As Gantz explained the next mission, a feeling of dread came over him. 24 hours in school!? Living through that period of life was a pressure cooker of stress and anxiety and if there was any way he could skip this mission he would. However that wasn’t an option so he had to suck it up and put on the uniform.