ι'м ɴew yorĸ'ѕ вeѕт ĸepт ѕecreт '

[gcldenthroat-blog]

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

gcldenthroat:

❛ i don’t enjoy letting people down. i don’t use people to feel better about myself. and i definitely don’t wear yellow and orange in the same week, let alone in the same outfit, okay?  maybe i did think you and i were alike. not anymore. in fact …

           i’d be embarrassed if someone thought i was like you.  ❜

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

lmao,

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

update ;;

so, what i’m gonna do is i’m gonna archive this blog and make a new one. there are so many spam blogs following me that i don’t even wanna deal with it. my tags are all fucked up and i just wanna start new. i’m not going to delete this blog because there are so many drabbles and things that I love that i wanna keep. but i am going to archive it once i’ve settled in to my new place. oh yeah, fun fact. i’m moving to washington state. (:

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

update ;;

so, what i’m gonna do is i’m gonna archive this blog and make a new one. there are so many spam blogs following me that i don’t even wanna deal with it. my tags are all fucked up and i just wanna start new. i’m not going to delete this blog because there are so many drabbles and things that I love that i wanna keep. but i am going to archive it once i’ve settled in to my new place. oh yeah, fun fact. i’m moving to washington state. (:

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

update ;;

so, what i’m gonna do is i’m gonna archive this blog and make a new one. there are so many spam blogs following me that i don’t even wanna deal with it. my tags are all fucked up and i just wanna start new. i’m not going to delete this blog because there are so many drabbles and things that I love that i wanna keep. but i am going to archive it once i’ve settled in to my new place. oh yeah, fun fact. i’m moving to washington state. (:

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

guys, i’m alive. just trying to get through this move. 

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

HIATUS NOTICE

hey guys. i don’t know why my muse has been so awful, probably because i’ve been stressing the fuck out and for some reason this blog is super stressful, but i’ve gotta put it on hiatus. i think i’ll probably move blogs bc there’s a whole bunch of spam that follows me and i just don’t wanna deal with it anymore. my tags are all gross and screwed up and everything is a mess. so, i’m gonna put this blog on hiatus for a bit. 

[natashalyonne]

[jennaye]

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

not so fabulous. i am so sorry for not being here. i’ve been busy with work and i’m trying to start packing my things because i’m gonna be moving in a month. so i’m trying to get everything ready and i’ve gotten sick on top of it all. i will definitely start doing more on here starting this weekend. 

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

PLOT STARTERS

"Nobody goes there anymore. They say it's haunted or something."

"Tell me you see that as well."

"Don't breathe it in!"

"I like you. You're not running after me with a knife. It's a rare trait to be had, these days."

"There it is again! That symbol! I've been seeing it everywhere."

"If you can't get us out of here, I don't want to hear it."

"So, what're you in for?"

"GET DOWN FROM THERE, YOU'RE GOING TO FALL!"

"What are they doing? Why are they all doing that?"

"Can you hear me? Listen, you need to stop this!"

"Fight it!"

"I know you're in there. Please."

"Incidentally, run for your life."

"It could have something to do with the garbage chute."

"Somebody just left it on the doorstep. I don't know what it is."

"Oh my god, what happened to you? Get inside!"

"Why are you bleeding?!"

"Oh, shall we do something that makes sense? Shall we, say, NOT actively try to get ourselves killed? NAH, you think, let's have some FUN."

"Help me."

"I'm... bleeding. If you had some way to fix that...?"

"Can you stop running AWAY from EVERYTHING?!"

"You're always talking but you never SAY anything."

"We're going to win."

"I always thought it would be... bigger."

"I always thought it would be... better."

"You have NO IDEA what it's like."

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

not so fabulous. that moment when you join your first rpg and you have no idea what you’re doing. also, hi. i’m alive. barely.

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

“You still haven’t told your parents about us? But you promised!”

dirty little secrets || accepting

                                  things had been going so WELL. their fights turned into small little spats that quickly rolled over  and they were fine within a couple of hours. things were great. they were LIVING together – almost had been for a couple of years now. it was GOOD, she was working. he was working it was how ADULT HOOD was supposed to be like. things were good. but it wasn’t going to last. it NEVER did. 

                                  the blonde had just gotten out of the shower – tied her dripping hair onto the top of her head and she slipped into one of the oversized shirts that were in her drawers. a simple GRAPHIC TEE. one she would never be caught in in public. but she was almost certain that this was chad’s – his shirts always managed to SOMEHOW end up in her drawers, or on her. she pulled on a pair of shorts,  reaching up to pull her hair down once more before she moved to grab a brush to begin pulling it through her tangled locks. Her eyes were focused on the mirror and she hadn’t even noticed he walked in the room. that his hand held her rose gold iphone. 

                                  ❛ your parents called.  ❜

                                  she hadn’t realized just how COLD he sounded. her bright pink brush still moving through her long blonde locks. her face scrunched up in disgust – she RARELY talked to her parents. they rarely ever wanted to talk to her.  

                                  ❛ i hope you didn’t answer and let it go straight to voicemail, because i REALLY don’t feel like talking to them. ever, actually.  ❜

                                  ❛ they thought i was PEYTON. ❜

                                  the blonde visibly froze, her eyebrows raising and swallowing thickly. that wasn’t good. that wasn’t good at all. she hadn’t told them anything. she never told them anything. she didn’t want to tell them about the two of them. really, it was stupid. it didn’t NEED to happen. she knew it wouldn’t end well. she wouldn’t have her PARENTS anymore. ryan would SUPPORT her no matter what but she couldn’t imagine what her parents would think of it. she turned to look at him, her eyes flicking up to his face and opening her mouth to immediately defend herself. 

                                  ❛ you STILL haven’t told your parents about us ? but you promised !❜

                                 she knew no matter WHAT she said it wasn’t going to fix this. she could see how angry he was. he was gripping onto her phone TIGHTLY, far too tight than it needed. she feared it would break. she didn’t care about the phone, she just didn’t want him to hurt his hand. they had TALKED so long ago about her telling her parents about them – but she DIDN’T. she still hadn’t.  she was stalling. she was SCARED. despite how they always seemed disinterested in her, they PROVIDED for her. they made sure she had the money she thought that she needed. the manicures. the shoes. the CLOTHES.  she didn’t know how she could survive without those things. if she COULD survive without them. their combined salaries wouldn’t be ENOUGH. she was scared. they would never approve of CHAD DANFORTH. they had barely even approved of peyton – her mom’s FRIEND’S son.  they had only ever approved of TROY BOLTON.  she couldn’t even BEGIN  to think what a dinner with her parents would start off like. IMMEDIATELY talking about troy, comparing him, hearing all the things that she KNEW he thought in high school. she KNEW because that was how she always hurt him. just like POKING AND PRODDING at her ryan insecurities.  she didn’t know if she could handle watching him hear just how VICIOUS and judgemental her parents could be. 

                                 ❛  chad – you don’t UNDERSTAND –❜

                                 ❛ don’t understand WHAT sharpay ? how hard it is being a rich blonde girl ? what it’s like to LOWER YOUR STANDARDS for me. no, i’ve got it. loud and clear, PRINCESS. ❜

                                 a nickname that had turned into a playful BANTER was spat out with so much hate. so much anger. so much HURT. her dark hues began to pool with tears, her fingers gripping onto his shirt that was hanging from her frame. her heart hurt. her good intentions never turned out the way she WANTED them to. it was like a damned CURSE. but she didn’t want him to deal with what she DEALT WITH her entire life. not being allowed to eat certain things because it ‘looked like she gained a couple of pounds’ or hearing her parents constantly PRAISE her brother. her DAD never being around, her MOM forcing her to get a nose job senior year because she would look prettier that way. he had an AMAZING family. she adored his parents, and they were the family that she always CRAVED. her life hadn’t been the hardest  life, but it hadn’t been as EASY as it looked.

                                ❛   no – chad just LISTEN  TO ME  ! ❜

                                but she knew it would NEVER be that easy. she watched as he TOSSED her phone on the bed, startling boi and hearing him BARK at chad, but she wasn’t focused on that. she was focused on HIM. the anger in his tone. the DISAPPOINTMENT on his face. the hurt in his eyes. it made her heart hurt. she didn’t WANT  to hurt him. she was tired of hurting him.  that was all she EVER did to him. that was all she ever did to ANYONE. but she had been trying. trying to fix things. 

                               ❛   listen to WHAT,  sharpay ? how your parents won’t APPROVE of me ? how they’ll wish that i was TROY  or fucking peyton ?  are you just WORRIED you’re not gonna have all of this NICE STUFF anymore ? maybe you’re just ASHAMED because i’m not peyton or troy. fuck knows that you spent ALL OF HIGH SCHOOL, chasing after him – and SPEND MOST OF YOUR FREE TIME with fucking peyton. what IS IT sharpay ?  is THAT what it is, because i can’t think of another reason why you wouldn’t tell your parents.  ❜

                                she was speechless. she didn’t KNOW that he was still so CAUGHT UP in his insecurities with peyton. she didn’t realize just how much being FRIENDS WITH HIM effected him. how scared he was to LIVE in troy’s shadow – that he STILL felt he was in troy’s shadow. she hadn’t wanted him to RELIVE those insecurities, the jarring words she would always send to him – he still LIVED with those words. it was stupid that she hadn’t realized it – because the words about how RYAN  was better than her, how everyone liked him better than her still ECHOED through her head. 

                              ❛   and the fact that it took you SO LONG to answer, just proves it. ❜

                             ❛   chad, STOP ! ❜

                             ❛   no, YOU stop, sharpay.❜ he turned to look at her, his dark eyes LOCKING with hers as his fingers gripped onto the door knob,  ❛  YOU used to go on about me growing some balls and to STOP being afraid of dealing with not being the GOLDEN BOY. it’s your turn.  stop being SO DAMNED afraid of your parents.and what THEY think of you. be a FUCKING adult and own up to your decisions. even though to EVERYONE ELSE they may seem like the wrong ones. ❜

                             SILENCE. nothing but silence filled the air between them. her lips were pressed together, TRYING NOT TO CRY. his hand was still gripping the door knob to their bedroom. THEIR BEDROOM. she couldn’t help but feel her heart sink. were they even going to be a THEM anymore ? they fought, and it had only been this bad ONE OTHER TIME. she had never felt so scared before in her entire life. they had made it SO FAR, so so far. and she was SCARED to lose him. she COULDN’T  lose him. not again. not EVER again. 

                            ❛   i’m going to TROY’S.  ❜

                             and before she could even RESPOND, the door slammed closed. sharpay’s small MANICURED hands balled into fists, inhaling and exhaling and trying to calm her heavily beating heart. trying to keep herself from CRYING. maybe he’d come back. he still needed CLOTHES. he had to come back eventually,  RIGHT ?  it wasn’t until she heard the front door slam, that a heart breaking sob fell past her lips and she crumbled onto their bed, boi IMMEDIATELY rushing onto her lap and nudging her hands until her fingers GRIPPED onto his fur. she had FUCKED UP again. she had some good intentions, but it blew up in her face. again.  she could hear her mother’s voice in the back of her head. don’t cry. evans’ don’t cry. it shows weakness, sharpay marie. you want to be strong, don’t you ?  but she COULDN’T be strong. not without him 

                              she swallowed thickly when she heard her phone ringing, a ringtone SPECIFICALLY for her parents. she didn’t want to talk to them. she didn’t want to listen to them.  she just wanted to be with her BOYFRIEND. the man she loved. her breath hitched and her eyebrows rose, her fingers stopping from moving through her dog’s soft fur. LOVE. god, it was such a stupid thing to think of. it had never come up before. she LOVED him. there was no denying it. so she needed to FIX it. she HAD TO FIX IT. sharpay calmed herself down enough so she could reach over with her trembling hands and swipe right so she could ANSWER the phone. she was greeted with the familiar ‘hi, kitten’ from her father and she swallowed slightly when he asked why PEYTON had hung up earlier.

                           ❛ DADDY, there’s something i need to talk to you and mother about… ❜

[ofhotheads-blog]

secret relationship starters

Feel free to alter to fit muses.

“I am not ready for them to find out about us!”

“It’s cool, [name] promised to cover for me.”

“My roommate’s out of town. Want to stay the weekend?”

“We’ve got to stop being so careless.”

“Look, if we get found out, I could get fired!”

“It’s hard to believe you actually care about me when you’re so hellbent on keeping this from all your friends.”

“I can’t tell them! Do you have any idea how they’d react?”

“Jesus, with all this sneaking around, it’s like being closeted all over again.”

“We have to tell them sooner or later.”

“Let’s tell them the truth. Tonight.”

“I’m only dating [name] as a cover. You’re still my baby.”

“[Name] agreed to ‘date’ me until we’re ready to tell everyone.”

“Are you ashamed of me?”

“I spent two hours hiding underneath your bed until they left!”

“Shit! Someone’s coming! Get in the closet, get in the closet!”

“Let’s just tell them! What’s the worst that could happen?”

“No one can know about us.”

“Let’s just keep this between us for now, okay?”

“People wouldn’t like it if they knew, you know that.”

“I’m not ashamed of you, I’m just not ready to tell anyone yet.”

“You still haven’t told your parents about us? But you promised!”

“It’s kind of fun, having a secret.”

“Let’s go out of town. Somewhere where nobody knows us.”

“Yeah, so… I may have accidentally told [name] about us…”

“I don’t care what you do, just get [name] to promise to keep quiet. Pay them if you have to.”

“I’m tired of being your dirty little secret!”

“Once I break up with [name], then we tell people.”

“But you’re going to divorce them soon, right?”

“This isn’t a relationship! Relationships don’t involve one party climbing down a fire escape because the other is too ashamed to admit they’re dating them!”

“Okay, fine, but can I at least tell [name]?”

“If I don’t tell someone, I’m going to go crazy!”

“Shhh, be quiet. Remember, someone’s still downstairs…”

“Fuck it. Let’s get a motel.”

“Either we’re open about this, or I’m ending it.”

“When I said I liked you, I didn’t expect to be sneaking around all the time.”

“I can’t do this anymore.”

“Why haven’t you told your friends about me? Is it because I’m not as well-off as you are?”

“This was fun at first, but the novelty’s worn off.”

“It just feels really shitty, to be the secret boyfriend/girlfriend.”

“Look, either we date secretly, or we don’t date at all.”

“I’m not supposed to be dating, period!”

“If my parents found out about us, they’d go ballistic.”

“Just one more year until I’m out from under their roof and I can date whoever the hell I want.”

“Dating in secret never works out.”

“Where are we even supposed to go for our dates?”

“Just once, I’d like us to go on a date that didn’t end in us having to get a motel room out of town because we don’t want to get caught.”

[gcldenthroat-archive-blog]

notsofabulous. hi i’m home. i worked today, and i figured since i’m back from my trip that i’d start my return off right. with a selfie.

[likeslovesdesires]

Ashley Tidsdale, so sexy.

[sammrps]

I Killed My BFF (2015): Chris Zylka as Alex Lachan