Isle of Elysium @gentleivory - Tumblr Blog

I Like a Look of Agony

Pairing(s): Byun Euijoo/Reader

Summary: Because I know it's true. Or, Euijoo meets you crying, a little drunk, and freshly broken up with and makes some interesting decisions.

Warning(s): Mandatory Implied/References to Suicide Ideation, Fake Dating, Implied/References to Cheating, I've dubbed this The BIPOC look of Confusion, oral (f & m receiving), edging, overstim, p in v (wrap it before you tap it folks!), creampie, breeding kink, idc idc idc euijoo is a FREAK, mating press | 19.5k

Note(s): there is...a lot of sex in this,

Fuma had disappeared somewhere in the club, Nico was on the dance floor, and K was…somewhere and the club was hot and stifling. It's not that Euijoo didn't enjoy going out and dancing, it was just…a lot all of a sudden. The sounds, the smells, all overwhelming him until he stumbles his way out to get some fresh air. He almost turns around when he hears the sound of a clang and some choice expletives in both Japanese and english.

"Stupid fucking piece of shit." You're full body sobbing, hands on knees as you heave and seem to try to get some air. "Can't believe he would do this shit to me. Moved back out to this stupid fucking country for him and—"

It's a stupid idea, but Euijoo has a hard time watching people have a bad day. He crouches slightly, holding a hand out to show he's harmless and you startle, looking at him. He knows he is not, by any means, a short guy. Though he's not particularly broad, he's doing all he can not to stand in a way that would scare you off. "Is everything okay?" You breathe out puffs of air in heavy heaves before you quite literally crumple in front of him, sobbing.

"No," you wail, covering your face. Your eyeliner is not water proof, he can tell, because it's streaking down your cheeks and he drops a bit lower to press a hand to your shoulder. "My stupid fucking boyfriend broke up with me and then invited me to his wedding all in the same spiel. And I can't tell my cousins because they all have the perfect life. And now I'm crying in the back of the club because I'm gonna die alone."

Euijoo could understand maybe every third word that came out of your mouth when you devolved into sobbing english. It's not like he didn't understand it, Nicholas and Maki spoke it enough around him that he could understand what people were saying. But between you sobbing and covering your face, he was kind of in the dark.

"Eh…" he sucks in a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I can't really understand you."

It only causes you to cry harder and he feels horrible for it, pulling you into his chest as you repeat yourself, clutching at the fabric of his shirt. "And now I'm in this stupid fucking country, at a job I hate for a guy who was cheating on me. And I can't even say he was cheating on me because apparently this whole time he's had a fiance. So he was cheating with me and then had the audacity to break it off and invite me to the wedding."

Euijoo gently buries his finger in your braids, damn there placing you on his lap. "That's fucked."

"That was mean, I don't think Japan is stupid. I love japan," you hiccup, nuzzling into his chest, "my grandparents are from Japan. I love Japan. Oh god." You rip yourself away from him. "I'm gonna be sick."

And this isn't where Euijoo thought his night would be: holding a drunk and grieving girls hair as she vomits off to the side. But, out of all the things he could be doing he doesn't hate it, oddly enough. The situation is gross but thankfully your vomit just smells like slightly more acidic alcohol, and you fumble with your purse, pulling out a small container of mouthwash.

"That was gross," you mumble after gargling, looking up at him with big brown eyes and full lips curled into a soft pout. "Sorry."

"No." Euijoo shakes his head. "No, it's okay. I'd rather have found you than someone else." He hesitates. "Are you…do you need help getting home?" When you shake your head, he's only slightly disappointed and you pat his chest, a little gently, a little cutely, the corners of your lips lifting slightly into a soft smile. "At least let me know you got there safe?"

"You're sweet," your say softly, tucking a braid behind your ear before gesturing for his phone, telling Euijoo your name. You type your number in, texting yourself nice guy from the bar.

"EJ."

"Cute."

You do text him when you get home. A picture of your bed before you probably pass out and he's relieved. You seemed like a nice person, and maybe he's thinking too hard about it that night. The way you looked while you cried. No one is truly that cute when they're sobbing but you're too pretty to not notice it and then he remembers what made you cry and it's another stupid idea.

It's dumb as shit.

Truly he knows, when it takes hold, you're probably going to tell him it's stupid. Who wants to go to their cheating exes wedding? He wouldn't. But…well, it won't leave him. This idea to show up to your piece of shit exes wedding with him, and make the man think you'd been with Euijoo this whole time. That you could one-up this guy because Euijoo knows men like that. They like to humiliate women. They cheat on or cheat with and then invite you to these places to show that they hold all the pieces. And sometimes women feel so downtrodden that they keep going back and he may not know you, but you don't deserve that.

You didn't deserve to be crying in the alleyway of a club without being able to tell your family what happened. You didn't deserve to feel that horrible. And also, Euijoo hates men like that. You deserve to, at least, get the last laugh when it came to your ex.

He also just might be projecting his personal feelings about situations like this, but he stands by it. So when he wakes up the next day he sends you a i think you should go

?

to the wedding

that's insane who is this?

He should've seen that one coming. You were very drunk last night. And crying.

EJ

From the bar?

From the bar

I gave you my number? Oh that is… SO embarrassing Thank you for holding my hair back when i threw up

don't worry about it Can I call…?

Probably should come over since we're saying and doing insane shit location pin

"You want me to go to my shithead exes wedding?" you ask flatly. You're even prettier when you're not crying. You let him into your apartment with little fanfare, and he steps over a suitcase to settle in and it takes a second for him to focus on your question.

"Just hear me out."

"It's a batshit insane idea, Ej," you say, bending over to grab a water bottle from the mini fridge sitting by your counter. Your pajamas are…distracting. Euijoo is a gentleman through and through, and it takes all his self control to avert his eyes from the way your shorts cut off a little higher than normal. It's not your fault, probably all genetics, the way you ass strains against the fabric and he clears his throat.

"I know. I know." His voice goes up just an octave, cheeks reddening as he fully turns around as if not to be tempted. "But what he did was wrong. And I dunno…I think you deserve your revenge."

"You don't even know me." Your eyebrow lifts in amusement. "We met last night."

"I know." Euijoo smiles awkwardly when you stand in front of him, hands on hips. You're so pretty it's distracting and the way you fill out your pajamas is harrowing. You're all soft skin and pretty doe eyes and lips that are in a perpetual pout and his vision blacks out for a second with an image he has to shake away. "But still."

Your head tilts to the side, squinting as you take him in. Under your gaze he feels like he's being analyzed. He finds himself straightening up to his full height, clasping his hand behind his back. Whatever you see relaxes you, and you cock your hip to the side. "You always this nice to people you first meet?"

"I've been told I'm a very kind person," he says with a shrug. Euijoo isn't sure how accurate that is. The reality is, he just hates seeing people be mistreated, and all he's ever wanted to do is be the gentleness in the world he's wanted to see. If that makes him kind, so be it.

"Why?"

How does he explain it to you? How does he put into words the feeling in his chest seeing you sobbing inconsolably in a back alley with your family somewhere in the club having fun? How to describe the thought that the only reason you should be crying is from happiness and pleasure? He can't, so he doesn't.

"Because you didn't deserve that," he says softly, "nobody does. People like that like to keep you on a leash so that you're always an option and that's not fair." Euijoo rocks on his heels, shoving his bangs out of his face for a moment while he thinks: You're too pretty to cry over things like that. "And you deserve to get the last laugh."

There's a flash of ivory, your bottom lip tucked between teeth before you nod. "Okay." He feels the pressure of your finger pressed against his clothed chest. You are so pretty, he thinks again, heart beating through his skin. He's sure you can probably see his heart palpitations through bone and flesh. "This is insane, but okay." You smooth the wrinkle in his shirt and he smiles, head ducking into his shoulder. "So what's the plan?"

Euijoo hadn't gotten that far. lips flattening out in thought. "When's the wedding?"

"Two months."

He nods with a soft hum. "Get coffee with me?"

The line of your neck tempts him, your head thrown back with your laughter. "You're an odd man, EJ."

"It's Euijoo," he says cheerily, "Byun Euijoo. But all of my friends call me Juju or EJ."

Big eyes crinkle at the corners with your smile and you look away. "Well if we're dating now," you say, taking a step closer to him, your body heat wafting off you the closer you get, "you should know I always call my significant others by their actual name." He feels the softness of your hand as you press your thumb against his knuckles, telling him your full name. "But please, just call me Starlight. Everyone does."

Euijoo flips your hands around to press his pointer into the center of your palm, gently tracing a line against the skin. When you shiver, Euijoo smothers a smirk with a soft breath before looking at you. Pretty. "I think I'd prefer to call you Darling or Baby. That okay?"

Your throat bobs with a hard swallow. "Y-yeah, that sounds okay. Good. Great, even." You turn swiftly on the balls of your feet, the tips of your ears flushing. "I'm gonna get dressed. You should sit. Relax. Uh." You don't finish the sentence, escaping into your room.

Your apartment is cute. Cozy. All the things you have decorating your space are some variation of a jewel tone. The space is decorated with a dark brown couch, an emerald green chair, deep red drapes, candelabra's of various sizes decorating the coffee tables among other things. There are dishes in the sink, almost like you didn't get a chance to do them the day before and Euijoo finds himself tidying up the small mess (from the night before he's sure). The sound of rustling alerts him to your presence as he finishes the rest of the dishes.

"You didn't have to do that."

He doesn't mind, not even in the slightest, shrugging while drying the last plate. "I don't mind," he murmurs.

Euijoo could practically feel your eyes on him, trailing down the length of him. From his peripheral, he sees the way you hold yourself, a little shy, a little anxious but your facial expression is awed, like you can't quite believe someone like him exists, and he feels himself preen under the emotion.

"Kind guy, indeed," you say softly, grabbing the hand towel to wrap around his hands. He could take it from you, but you're so focused on patting his hands dry he lets you. Euijoo could see it now, how hard you love, giving bits of yourself to the person you've chosen. Loving them with every action you take, every glance you bless them with. It must be hard for most people to get under your skin, and burrow their way into your bloodstream. But once someone is there, he sees, that's it.

"Thank you."

Brown eyes peak at him from long lashes, pupils suddenly dilating in real time when you two make eye contact. Just as quickly as your eyes meet, you avert your gaze back to his hands. "Don't mention it." The towel makes a fwap sound as you air it out and put it back in its place. "C'mon. I know a really good coffee shop."

—

"You're kidding."

The way you laugh is soft and sweet. You hide it behind a hand and a ducked head, a stars light hidden behind a cloud. "No, I'm serious. If we're going to do this, we might as well go for it, y'know? I—" you sigh, rolling your eyes— "I like physical touch. A lot—Oh shit."

"What?" Euijoo looks around, eyes darting back and forth through the cafe to see what has you losing color and turning around.

"Oh god, I forgot Takeshi comes here to." You pause. "The ex. He's coming over here, fuck." He spots the man a second later. Dark hair, decent height, wide and the kind of handsome that left a bad taste in Euijoo's mouth. The kind of handsome that reeks of never having to try hard for things and it irritates him immediately.

Lips twist to the side in thought, his hand circling your waist as he dips down. "Do you trust me?"

"Well, I met you last night, so—" you look at him from the corner of your eye— "sure."

"Good." When Euijoo kisses you it feels like a supernova or the inevitable clashing of star dust and a nuclear fusion birthing a new star. Your lips taste like artificial strawberry, and it's completely addicting as he pulls you in closer. Your back arches, your hands bunch his shirt wrinkling it and someone clears their throat. Doe eyes look up at Euijoo damn there with sparkles in them, lips just slightly puffy from the kiss. It was no makeout session, more similar to an absent minded kiss of affection, but clearly its enough to piss the man in front of them off.

"Takeshi." Your voice hits a nervous pitch, fingers tucking a braid behind your ear. "Hey."

"Hi." The man's voice is flat, unimpressed, sizing up Euijoo from his feet to the tip of his head. Euijoo is not vain by any means, but he's also not a liar. One can only get called attractive so many times before they learn to accept it as a fact, and Euijoo has accepted that he is very attractive to many people. Up close, Takeshi is tall, but not taller than him. He clears your ex with many inches to spare, and he can tell even Harua is a bit taller than him. You're not tall by any stretch of the imagination, you're not so short that the height difference between you and Euijoo would be too awkward, but the height difference between you and Takeshi seems comfortable. Maybe that's what attracted you to the man at first. In order to talk to Euijoo you have to crane your neck just a bit further than what would be strictly comfortable, but not entirely unwanted.

Takeshi dips his head, brown eyes still on you as he greets Euijoo. It's clear to him the other man does this as a means of disrespect with plausible deniability. It's just respectful enough that if he got angry it would seem odd. Someone like Nico would have corrected him with a sharp gaze and a sly tongue, and Euijoo wishes he was similar to his friend in this way. But he's not, so instead he smiles and bows back. Neither men offer their name, both looking at you just as you tuck under the taller of the two as if to shield you from the awkwardness of this situation.

"Oh!" You clear your throat. "Takeshi, this is Euijoo, my boyfriend. Euijoo this is Takeshi."

Takeshi raises an eyebrow just as Euijoo goes, "Oh, this is Takeshi. I've heard a bit about you."

"You have?" I've heard nothing about you, goes unsaid and he watches as Takeshi's fingers twitch as if to grab hold of you just as Euijoo delicately twirls your braids around his finger as he hums. "I'm surprised you have a boyfriend." It's a challenge if he's ever seen one. "When did you start dating?"

Euijoo doesn't recognize this feeling in him, ugly and venomous. His smile is…sharp and possessive as he says, "A year and a half ago. Though, I'm not surprised you haven't heard of me. My baby can be pretty private." A pause and he can see the way the man is seething and how your eyes widen. "Isn't she?"

Takeshi lets out a harsh breath, his smile going strained and brittle. "Yeah." When your ex looks at you, you've fixed your face, looking up at Euijoo. "Yeah she is."

"Can't be any worse than not telling anyone that you're getting married," you say, and you do such a good job at keeping any bitterness out of the words, Euijoo can't help but to squeeze your side in acknowledgment. Even if Takeshi wanted to, he would not be able to read into your words with how light and unbothered they sounded. "Well, I'll see you at work, Takeshi. And give your fiance our best." The way you turn to head to the counter is so final, Euijoo presses his lips together to smother an amused smile.

He's not sure if you know this but he's never seen someone's kindness be so sharp and cutting before. You might not think it, but you are the kindest person he has ever met.

So, can you come with me to a wedding?

? I thought I was already coming to a wedding?

Yeah so! Haha, funny story I forgot that my coworker/friend is having a wedding In 2 weeks That I never RSVP'ed for But now she knows we're dating So…

2 weeks? I should be free. Let me confirm :)

You're nervous, Euijoo can tell. Your hand shakes just a bit as you try to smooth out the wrinkles of your dress, and you can't seem to take a deep enough breath to settle.

"Are you okay?" It's a dumb question, but it's the best one he can offer as he slides his fingers between yours to lift your hand.

"Yeah, I'm fine." A pause as his fingertip trail a line down the back of your hand before you let out another sharp breath. "I'm so fucking nervous, Euijoo."

You look at him, a flush of nerves coloring the tips of your ears, full lips pressed into a straight line with big eyes that beg for stability, and he smiles gently.

"Don't be." Your eyebrow twitches and he laughs. "I'm serious. You trust me right?" You probably shouldn't, he knows, but he hopes you do. Euijoo likes to think he's a pretty trustworthy guy, and he would never want you to feel unsafe around him. But three weeks of off and on communication does not make trust, and he knows this. He watches you, waiting for whatever you seem to be searching for, and sees the way the nerves leave your tight shoulders.

"Yeah." Your head tilts and you smile at him soft, and sweet, and Euijoo reaches up to cup your cheek. He's not sure if you even recognize you do it, but you nuzzle into his palm, a delicate sigh filling the air before you straight up. "Okay, let's go before I change my mind."

The wedding is extravagant. Your leg never stops shaking throughout the entirety of the ceremony. The table shakes with it's bouncing and he reaches down, gripping your thigh between his fingers, and squeezing tightly. You settle, though it is not without a shiver and a sharp inhale from his touch.

Euijoo knows who he is. He knows what people see him as. He's kind, likeable, and soft. His members call him Ponyo, and he's well aware of the fans often calling him Sweet Juju. And he is all those things, he likes to believe, even if he's not too sure about the kindness people impress upon him. But there is something beneath it all, something he has had many years to settle with. Something that the few people he has slept with have had varying reactions to. Perverse, weird, intense were just some of the words that had been assigned to him. At first it had been hard. There had been a shame Euijoo had felt as he was learning himself and his sexual appetite.

The intensity could be too much, it had scared away one too many people over the years. Fencing had helped some of it, he likes to think, settled him and focused his intensity throughout middle school and long before he had a word for what was bubbling under his skin. But it had been many years since then. Enough years that he's learned to be okay with it, learned to accept this aspect of himself. His head tilts in thought, leaning down to nuzzle the side of your head, burying his nose into the curls there.

"You okay?"

You pull away just a bit, looking at him with eyes so wide they shone. He watches as your pupils dilate, engulfing the center.

"You've asked me that already," you huff.

"And I'm asking again," he murmurs, a rough squeeze to your thigh. Something harsh slithers to the surface, his disappointment at your petulance displayed simply through the way he holds you. Just as quickly, Euijoo glides his thumb soothingly across your leg. "So, are you okay?"

Your eyes dart to the side, and he makes a noise, a low hum of discontent when you stop looking at him. Like you can't help yourself, you drag your gaze back and he squeezes twice.

"Anxious," you mutter shyly, "that's all."

Euijoo tracks the people around you two in the venue. People are dancing, drinking, and all the ways of having fun. He can feel your exes gaze on you from somewhere, and he stands, grabbing your other hand and pressing a kiss against it.

"Let me help?"

"I—" you cut yourself off, the tips of your ears darkening with your anxiety— "how?"

Euijoo says nothing, parting through the crowd to find the door he had seen some odd hours ago when you had first entered the space.

"Euijoo?"

His gaze dart from side to side, pulling you through the open door and closing it behind him. "Do you trust me, Darling?"

He crowds you against the door, pressing his hand against your jaw when you look away to tilt your gaze back up. It's a darker repetition from before, an intensity that didn't exist when the two of you were planning on heading in. His pointer taps your cheek three times, forcing you to meet his eyes. "Darling?"

"I…" It seems you're tongue tied, his free hand bunching up the fabric of your dress. His fingers drag against the softness of your skin and Euijoo, in a gentleness that hides his intensity, shakes your head from side to side.

"I…?" He stops suddenly, the edge of your underwear stopping his movement for a moment. "Words."

His pointer tucks under the elastic of your underwear, pulling it away from your skin before letting it go so it snaps against your thigh.

"Y-yeah." You nod, "yeah, I trust you, Euijoo."

He grabs your hand, curling your fingers around your dress. He squeezes once, then twice, slipping to his knees. "How do you like it?"

"Huh?"

Euijoo peers up at you from his eyelashes, kissing your knee, then your thigh before lifting your leg and placing it over his shoulder. "How do you like getting fucked, darling?"

You smell good. Tangy and sweet and his mouth waters at the thought of tasting you. "I, uhm, I like it s-soft."

He hums to himself, cupping the back of your thighs to hold you up as he nuzzles into you. "Soft." The way he says the word has an almost has a musical note to it. Euijoo wants to taste you, kiss your lips, feel you dripping against his tongue, but he's patient (a saint really) and licks you through fabric. The fabric clings to you, the wet patch spreading as his nose nudges your clit.

His tongue presses against you, lips sealing around where you're hidden, and he hears the thump of your head hitting the door. Your free hand flies to cover your mouth, hiding the delicate moan you let out. Your hips twitch and he holds you tighter humming against you. Impatience takes hold of him, and Euijoo pulls away just long enough to slip your underwear to the side to slide his tongue across your slit. You're tangy, bursting on his taste buds as he drags it up to your clit. He hooks your underwear over his pointer, his tongue catching just under your nub.

Your moans are soft, muffled by your hand, and he wishes he could hear you. It's okay, though, there's a better time and place to fuck you and listen to you moan. He traces the edges of your slit and your knee buckles, your hand suddenly digging into his hair.

"N-no," you groan, and his eyes fly to yours. You can barely keep them open, fingers shaking with the effort it takes to talk and feel good at the same time. "No, uhm, I'm s-sorry. I, hngh, can't have—" You're so shy and cute, Euijoo's head tilts to the side even as he retreats to suck your clit into his mouth. No penetration, he thinks to himself, adjusting accordingly, because above wanting to taste you, feel you, and make you feel good, he also wants you to know you're safe in his hands as he does so. "H-hurts sometimes."

His hum has you twitching, your fingers tightening in his hair. You're so sensitive, getting wetter by the minute with each movement of his tongue. Euijoo learns you with each motion. The flat of his tongue does nothing but give you a well needed break from being overwhelmed. But when he flicks the tip of his tongue against the underside of your clit, scooping it into his mouth and sucking your body tenses, legs shaking, and back arching with pleasure.

He's steady in his movement, keeping a gentle but firm pace, and he can tell you're getting closer and closer by the way your stomach clenches and your fingers tighten. You're starting to babble, your leg tightens where it's tossed over his shoulder, body curling into itself. "Euijoo, Euijoo, Euijoo," you chant, fingers spasming around the fabric of your dress, "I think I'm going to cum?"

You're cute, he thinks, watching the way your nose scrunches with each stroke. You're questioning the feeling you have in your bones, bubbling in the pit of your stomach as it tenses. "Fuck, fuck—hah." Your knees buckle with your orgasm. He feels you pull his hair, a slight twinge of discomfort that he relishes in as he helps you ride through the wave of pleasure. Your breath is labored, eyes squeezed shut when he flattens his tongue against your clit in a soothing motion. He slides it across your slit, your sweetness coating his tongue while he cleans you up. Your hips twitch away from his mouth, and he pulls away, pressing a kiss against your thigh.

It's quiet for a moment while he unhooks your underwear from his finger so it covers you once more. Euijoo presses a kiss against you through the fabric, taking a deep breath of your smell before gently unfurling your fingers from where they were wrapped around your dress to keep it up so it could fall easily. He smooths the wrinkles from the fabric, and then stands. You haven't let go of his hair, though your grip had loosened significantly since your orgasm, and he cups your cheeks, pressing a kiss to your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, and then your lips. Gentle, as always, his thumb pressing against the underside of your chin so your head tips back.

"You, you…" you've barely gotten your bearings, trying to form words with the aftershocks of pleasure still racing through your veins. He kisses you again, a gentle brush before tilting your head to the side and pressing his lips to your jawline.

"I…?"

He's waiting. Euijoo is patient, he can wait all night for you to form words, but he hopes whatever sentence you're trying to put together is kind. Instead, your hand slips out of his hair and rests against his neck, fingers shaking with effort. "T-Thank you."

His laugh is relieved, forehead resting against your collarbone as his shoulders shake. "No need to thank me," he says softly, pulling back to look at you. Your eyes meet his, a little glazed but otherwise present, and Euijoo can't help but kiss you again. The thing inside of him is satiated for the time being, the hungry waters calm for the first time in a few months. "I wanted to help."

You're shy, he can tell, but you scoff, lightly shoving his face away from yours. "You always this hands on when you're helping?"

He hums, watching while you attempt to fix your hair. When you're finished, he grabs your hand, kissing your knuckles, and opening the door. "No," he says with a smile, "I just couldn't help myself. You looked like you needed it." A pause. "And I enjoyed it."

And it's clear he did help. Your shoulders are looser, tension having disappeared from the way you hold yourself. He thinks your ex could walk up on you right now and you wouldn't even care. Still, your ears color, and you hide your face in his shoulder as you mutter: "Shut up."

Why didn't you tell me you were an idol??

Wasn't that important to be honest

Well my coworker said her daughter has a picture of you on her wall Seems pretty important to me

Ehhh I guess! Didn't seem super important to me is all Are we still on for that company dinner this weekend?

You are so aggravating! Yes. Thank you by the way

:) I'm going to be in practice tonight but let me know when you're going to sleep okay?

What if I don't want to?

Darling Be good for me

"Wait, where are you going?"

Euijoo barely spares Maki a glance while he ties his shoes, though he wonders how he should answer the question. He could just say out, but Maki would get nosy, and then he'd have to explain everything, and Euijoo just doesn't feel like explaining everything right now. His tongue glides against his teeth as he thinks to himself before shrugging. "Going on a date," he says, and Maki takes it easily enough.

"Everyone is too busy for me," the younger boy whines, tossing himself on Euijoo's bed in good humor.

"Fuma?"

"Sneaking around with his friends with benefits," Maki says easily, and he feels his eyebrows furrow in confusion. "Oh, Juju, you have no idea, do you? I'll tell you after your date."

"O-okay? What about Nico?"

"On a long distance date."

"Jo then?"

"On a date at the park. But he's too shy to call it a date."

"Is everyone dating someone right now?" Euijoo asks in bemusement.

"No, Harua, Yuma, Taki and I are still painfully single," Maki says, tossing Euijoo's pillow in the air. When he gestures for the youngest to go to any of those options, Maki pouts. "K hyung and Taki are doing a live right now." A slight pause as the boy curls his lips. "And we haven't hung out in a while."

If he wasn't running behind schedule, Euijoo would stay, but he can't. So all he can do is ruffle Maki's hair, tipping the slightly shorter boys head back. "I apologize. I've been so busy lately during our down time." His smile is bright and fond as he stands, and puts his jacket on. "I'll make sure we can hang out tomorrow, yeah?"

Maki blows out a raspberry, but agrees nonetheless, and Euijoo heads out.

He wants to text you that he's close, but you are so bad at responding that he knows you won't look at it until, maybe, tomorrow morning and apologize for the delay. Some days you respond faster than expected, but you had admitted to him, quite embarrassed when he called the other day, you have your phone on Do Not Disturb and you don't check your messages often enough.

("To be completely honest, I've been avoiding talking to my family and they love texting," you had said quietly in the night when he had called you after practice. "I feel so silly avoiding them so much. They're great, I swear. I just have never quite fit in and it's just awkward trying to connect with them when they all have these inside jokes that I don't quite understand.")

When you answer the door his heart stutters to a stop, and he feels his breath freeze. You're a vision in your dress. Your makeup is done, and you're hair is in a style he's never seen before but frames your face beautifully.

"You know you're early right?" The door closes behind him, and he leans against it. Euijoo can feel it, bubbling up from the center of his chest into his minds eye. The sudden hunger that slithers across his spine, blackens his vision is familiar. He's spent so much time having control, holding his wants tightly against his chest that it surprises him. It's more than a loss of control that begins to grip him, when he steps closer to you. "Euijoo?"

"Mhm." He nods, eyeing the way your dress brushes against your thighs. Hanging over a chair, he spies your coat, shoes, and stockings and makes a mental note to remind you to take a picture for later.

"Euijoo."

His hand wraps around the curve of your waist, his arm tucking under the bend of your knees to lift you. You make a little noise, arms wrapping around his shoulder. "Euijoo, what the fuck?" He deposits you on your couch, lifting your dress and practically ripping your underwear off, tossing them in the direction of your tights.

"You look pretty," he murmurs, tossing your legs over his shoulders.

"Euijoo—ah," you hiss when he licks a strip against your cunt. "Euijoo, we have to leave—"

"In an hour and thirty minutes," he says, flicking your clit with the tip of tongue, "we'll be fine." Euijoo kisses his way up your tummy, your legs slipping from his shoulders to his waist, before licking his fingers to press against your clit, and caging your head with his free arm. "At the wedding you said nothing inside, that it hurts?"

"I, ah, yeah." You nod, a soft moan as he lazily rubs against clit. Your hips twitch, thighs tensing as you grab at his wrist. Euijoo tilts his head to the side, a question in his gaze while he toys with you. "Uhm, hmm, I can't feel much d-digitally—ah." He tsks when your eyes close, and you force them open. "Uhm, it's k-kind of embarrassing."

He shakes his head, a soft coo in his voice as he slowly increases his pace. "No its not. I like knowing what makes you feel good." He stops suddenly when your eyes close again, waiting until they open to begin again. "Tell me."

"Oh my god." Your nails dig into his forearms, and you take a deep breath. "Uh, I j-just. This is good, great—fuck, fuck, Euijoo that feels so good." You gulp, trying to find the words, and he's amused by how difficult it seems for you to focus. "'M sensitive, s-so I don't n-need a lo—t. I don't need a lot. No, no, Euijoo, why?"

He stops again, just as you seem to get closer to your orgasm again. He waits for a few moments before starting up again. "But nothing digitally?"

You shake your head, legs shaking while he traps your clit between two fingers.

"Sex?"

"Mmm, need lube," you moan, "but I like it. F-feels good."

—

The two of you make it to the dinner with time to spare. Though, your legs were shaky after 40 minutes of being edged. You hadn't cum, much to your vocal dismay, but Euijoo knew you wanted nothing more than to be good for him. You hold on to him, pressing your forehead into his bicep in moments when want, and need makes you ache.

Your co-workers are nice, Hana, the one who had apparently been the one who told you he was an idol, greets you two in excitement.

"Well speak of the devil!" she tosses her arms around your shoulders, shaking you side to side before tipping her head to Euijoo. "Me and Takeshi were just talking about when you would get here!"

"Oh?"

"Well you know Takeshi," she says, waving a hand in the air, "you're his favorite coworker. Between me and you." Hana leans in conspiratorially. "Takeshi has had a crush on our girl here, and now he's mad she's not readily available. Crazy, considering he's getting married. But whatever."

"Does he?" Euijoo asks, rocking on his heels, and Hana laughs as you try to shush her.

"You should've seen him when she first started! He used to glare at all the male coworkers who would talk to her." She rolls her eyes. "I love him, but he's annoying as hell."

Euijoo looks down at you, watching the way your skin flushes with the gossip Hana gives him and he smiles brightly. "I'm not worried," he says, reaching up to lightly rub his thumb against your chin, "I'm surprisingly possessive."

He didn't think it was in him. Kind Juju. Gentle Juju. Ponyo Juju. Possessive Juju, who wants you to himself, who wants to be the only one who hears you moan as you cum, and watch as you curl upon yourself in pleasure. Euijoo is a simple man, he knows what he wants, he works to get what he wants, and sometimes he gets what he wants.

Sometimes he doesn't, and he has to be okay with that. But he's used to working hard, and he's willing to work hard for this. You press your shoulders together with his words, and Hana grins, elbowing you hard. "Possessive, huh?"

Euijoo smile grows larger when he sees your ex make his way towards you. His head dips slightly, and Takeshi is forced to offer him the same greeting as not to be disrespectful, and your ex looks at you. "Nice of you to join us."

You hum, leaning against Euijoo with a soft sigh. "You act like I'm late," you say with a laugh, "we're still early."

"Later than usual," Takeshi says, and Hana nudges him with an eye roll as if to say: See.

"That's my fault," Euijoo says, pressing a kiss to the top of your head, "we got a bit…sidetracked."

Takeshi's jaw clenches and Hana pulls you away from the two of them to save your spot near wherever it was she decided to sit. Euijoo does nothing for a moment, the two of them watching as Hana does so, but when you're far away enough Takeshi turns towards him.

"So, you said your name was Euijoo?"

He hums. "Most people call me EJ, though."

"Euijoo…that's Korean, right?"

"Yep."

"What's got you so far away from home?" Whatever Takeshi is trying to do is not working, and it's clear because Euijoo is not the type of man who takes this type of bait easily. He's not jealous or overly aggressive in any capacity. Instead, patience, his natural disposition made better by fencing is what people like Takeshi gets. Euijoo is slow to anger. So much so, it's damn there impossible to get him there. He can count on one hand how many times he's gotten angry enough to cause a scene, and Euijoo isn't the type to cause a scene to begin with.

He's not particularly talkative, and he's not extroverted. The irony of that is not lost on him, because he keeps attracting some of the most extroverted people out there. Except you.

You're certainly not as quiet as he can be, but you're not outgoing. You like to spend your time inside, and you keep to yourself. He likes the quiet way you hold yourself. He likes subconscious tactility that indicated your need for physical touch. And oh how he enjoys how much you needed to be touched.

He hates that he shared this with Takeshi. Takeshi who lied to you. Takeshi who didn't deserve your sweet moans, gentle touch, and dazed expression. Euijoo's lips press together, head rocking on his neck as he thinks.

"I'm a singer," he says, lips parting into, what he hopes is, a smile belying a gentleness that he does not feel in his bones. If the way Takeshi suddenly tenses is any indication, Euijoo probably did a shit job seeming friendly. It was odd, he'll admit. He's not a particularly angry person. He wears kindness on his skin as if he was born with it (and he was). But something about the man before him brings out a nastier side. A side Euijoo, seldom has to wrangle but, knew he hypothetically had.

"A singer?"

Euijoo hums, nodding slowly. "Mhm. We go back and forth to Korea every once and a while. I do, at least," he says, tipping his head so he can look at Takeshi from the corner of his eyes. A condescension eating his kind expression, and he watches your ex grit his teeth.

"Oh."

Yeah, Euijoo thinks, oh. She moved on. She found better. She found me. You're but a footnote in the grand scheme of her life. It eats away at you, doesn't it? That you don't have access to her anymore. That she's mine.

From your spot across the room, you look up, meeting his eyes with a small quirk of your lips. You don't tilt your head, you don't crook a finger, but he can read you. You want him over where you are. You want him right beside you. He pats Takeshi on the shoulder, sliding past him. "Excuse me," he says, barely hiding gleeful possession, "My baby is calling."

He saddles right next to you, tucking his hand against the small of your back, absently brushing his thumb across the fabric of your dress in a vain attempt to feel your skin. A shiver races up your spine as you tuck into him, and he presses a kiss to the crown of your head. You raise up to press your lips to the shell of his ear, and he leans down so you don't have to strain too much.

"Fun conversation?"

A chuckle leaves him, and he pulls back to look at you, tipping his head with his shrug. "It was a conversation," he murmurs. His free hand cups your jaw, tilting your head to the side so he can spare you the embarrassment from his next words. "It's much more fun listening to you moan for me."

You go rim-rod straight, cheeks heating under the palm of his hand, though he can hardly see it under your complexion. "Euijoo."

"I'm just saying."

ej, please don't

don't what?

make it a big deal

okay i won't

ej ej oh my god

i don't know an ej So it's fine :)

Your 29th birthday is a small affair, Euijoo makes sure of it. He reserves the restaurant, sending your best friend the details, sends a small bouquet of lily's, and orders your lunch. You're not too keen on huge gestures, but Euijoo is aware of the way he would celebrate his significant other (intense, he thinks), and more than that, it was important that Takeshi didn't think he could somehow get under your skin with snide comments.

To say he didn't like your ex was an understatement. Euijoo didn't hate people very often, but he hated Takeshi, and for good reason. The more comfortable you get with him, the more you reveal of your previous relationship. Underhanded comments about you that presented themselves as reassurance, making you doubt your desirability. You would repeat his words with an air of casualty that belied the way your shoulders hunched closer to your ears, and he wasn't a particularly violent man, but for a moment Euijoo thought about finding where Takeshi lived and cold clocking him.

He didn't, obviously, but he fantasizes about it every once and a while. In any case, your birthday found it's way into his calender at the same time he was set to go to Korea, which was annoying.

Don't get him wrong, Ej loves being an idol. He loves his job, truly. But his job getting in the way of being with you? That was annoying. His phone vibrates, and he turns it over just to see that you've texted him. An image of you with Hana illuminated by the glow of candles on the cake he had ordered for you. You're smiling, your cheek resting in the palm of your hand. The atmosphere of the restaurant darkens your eyes, but it also creates a subtle sparkle that has him saving the image.

thank you image.png

no need to thank me

you say that a lot but im not going to listen so thank you <3

it's my job as your boyfriend to make sure your birthday is fun

fake boyfriend

the point remains

Euijoo turns his phone over in frustration. Fake boyfriend, he thinks, knee bouncing in annoyance, right. You weren't…wrong. You two had only been fake dating for a month or so, and after then what? What will he have to do or say to continue this farce? Could he even convince you to really date him? That was the most annoying part.

He wanted you in a way he's never wanted anything before, and he feels a little stupid. A month. A month, and that's all he needed to have fallen into a hole of want and need. He wants you so bad it lights him up from the inside. He wants the way you moan, the way your legs tremble under his fingers. He wants the way you laugh, the way you toss your head back, eyes crinkling on the side with your joy.

He wants you.

And he gets you sometimes. Through sex, through this pretend dating. But it wasn't enough. Hundred of miles away from you, he wants to be in your skin. He wants you walking by so he can grab your waist and pull you down. He wants to introduce you to his family, to his members, and enmesh your life with his. He wants to kiss you all the time, taste you whenever he can. I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, he thinks just as his phone rings. 10 minutes before getting on stage, he answers anyways when he sees your name, rushing out the door to a quieter place.

"Euijoo!"

Your drunk, but your voice is like a breath of fresh air, and he breathes out your name.

"Hey, darling," he murmurs, toeing the tile underneath him. "Good birthday?"

"Oh the best—" he can hear the sound of your clothes rustling as you take them off— "thank you for not making it a huge thing."

"You asked me not to," he says, leaning against the wall, "why wouldn't I listen to you?"

"People don't, usually. Takeshi never listened to me," you say, and he can hear the pout in your words, "I don't think he was a good boyfriend. Oh! Thank you for the gift. It's so pretty, I'm half tempted to wear it right now."

Euijoo groans, covering his face in want. His pants tighten slightly, and you giggle. "Are you drunk, darling?"

You hum, your bed creaking under your weight. "L'il tipsy, but not drunk." A pause. "I like it when you call me that."

"Darling?"

The sound you make is erotic, and he would rub his eyes if he didn't have makeup on.

"Yeah," you whisper, shy suddenly. God you're so fucking cute. Just so delicate, and soft, and he wants to press you between his hands, mold you into a needy, whiny thing, and then put you back together again. His eyes catch on of his members from the door, tapping their wrist and Euijoo nods.

"I have to go—" you groan in protest and he laughs gently— "can you do me a favor?" When you voice your affirmation, his fist clenches in want. "Can you wear it for me?"

"Y-yeah." He can imagine you nodding, and he's almost taken out by the image of you wearing his gift. "Do you want pictures, too, Euijoo?" He swallows.

"Only if you want to."

A moment as you mull it over. "I do want to."

If he could, he'd fly back right now and fuck you. Instead, he has to perform with a half chub, and heat in his veins, with only the knowledge that when he gets back, there will be a picture of you in his phone, wearing the soft lilac set that he'd bought you. The same set you'd offhandedly mentioned, because you had a taste for cute girly things, and it's been a while since I've been able to wear something like it. Takeshi thought it was stupid, and I guess I started molding myself into a different person for him.

"Baby, I have to go."

"Mmm, good luck Euijoo. I know you guys are going to kill it." Now your words are only slightly slurred, and it takes almost all his strength to hang up. When he makes his way back to where his members were, him and Maki make eye contact, the younger man wiggling his eyebrows after a moment. His face flushes, and he tosses the phone into his bag.

Much later, when he's washed the sweat off his body, and changes into his sleeping clothes, he opens his phone. There you are, in all your glory on his screen. Sheer fabric, lace and frills draping over soft skin. You look like sin incarnate, and he shoves his fist into his mouth. He wants to spread your legs, slide his cock right between your thighs and fuck you in the baby-doll pajamas. He can see himself sliding the fragile fabric of your thong to the side to do so, cum deep inside so that it takes, and then you'd have no choice but to stay with him.

You're sat on the bend of your knees, the top sits delicately over your hips, covering where your thong presses against you.

you look pretty darling

he takes a moment, tapping his thumb against the side of his phone.

i miss you

i miss you, too is that weird to say? we've only known each other for a month

no no i don't think it's weird you're sweet i think about it all the time i think about how sweet you are and how you deserve to be treated gently

euijoo

im sorry you're just so pretty

you're really nice to me i don't think i deserve it half the time

that's not true you deserve all of that and more you're much sweeter than you give yourself credit for

pathetic you mean?

He thumbs the message down.

no, sweeter I didn't stutter

well…we're texting, so you can't stutter

… I come home in three days I'm gonna get you

wait no i was joking! EJ image.png

The image loads, the plush of your thighs hiding a pretty cunt, legs curled beside you. You've lifted your top slightly, and he can see the lilac string of your thong before it disappears betwixt the bend of your knees.

forgive me?

i was never mad to begin with you know, you don't have to send me photos like that if it makes you uncomfortable.

yeah i want to, i think i don't feel pressured to do it but i can stop…?

please don't as long as you're sure god, you're so pretty and sweet

shut up

—

The flight home fills him with jitters. Euijoo is restless, impatient because he wants to be with you right now. Fuma's hand settles on his knee, making his leg stop.

"What's gotten into you?"

He mulls it over, running his tongue across his teeth, unsure if he wants to talk about it. Euijoo is not particularly private, so he doesn't know why he's hesitating so much.

"I've been…seeing someone."

Fuma's eyebrows raise, and Euijoo waves a hand in front of him.

"Kind of. I'm kind of seeing someone," he says, "it's complicated."

"Do you like them?" Fuma says kindly. He's always kind, Euijoo can always depend on that. He depends on Fuma in many ways, not just as a co-leader, but as a person he can trust. "The person you're kind of seeing."

Quiet, again, as he thinks to himself.

"Yeah…yeah." He nods to himself. "It's only been a month, is that crazy?"

"It's not like you're saying you're in love with them," Fuma says with a shrug, "I'd be worried if you were saying that. But having feelings for someone?" He shakes his head, raking his fingers through his hair. "That's normal."

Whatever was holding himself back loosens with Fuma's words. A breath leaves him in relief, hand pressing against his chest.

"I've been sleeping with someone for exactly that long myself," Fuma says casually, knocking their shoulders together, "I think I like them, too. It's supposed to be casual but…" His friend shakes his head. "I don't think I can do casual, actually. I thought I could, but I'm enamored with them. That's not weird, right?" The look he gives Euijoo is sardonic.

"No," Euijoo says, looking out the window as the plane continues to pass over the ocean, "no, I don't think so. If you were saying you were in love with them then I'd be worried."

They share a laugh, settling into silence.

A long two hours later, Euijoo doesn't even remember landing, just that the next thing he knows he's knocking on your door with his duffel bag and his heart in his ass.

"One sec!" He can hear you stumbling to the door, and he has to cover his mouth to smother his laughter. He can bet money you're looking for a pair of pants, maybe even a shirt, so aware is he of the state of undress you like to be in when you're lounging in your apartment. When you open the door, it's in a state of slight disarray that tells him he was spot on in his assessment. It takes you a second to realize it's him and not some random person knocking on your door, your expression brightens immediately. "Euijoo, hi."

"Hi."

You move so he can make his way in, toeing his shoes off and dropping his bag to the floor. The fabric of your pajama pants sit tightly across your hips, and thighs and he straightens slowly.

"What are you doing here?" Your hands flutter in the air uselessly, like you want to touch him but can't. He wants to tell you that you are more than allowed to touch him. He wants you to stop holding yourself back, allow yourself the level of attention and care you wish to give. "Aren't you tired?"

"Mhm, very." He grabs your hand from the air, pressing his lips against your knuckles.

"Euijoo?"

"I missed you," he says softly, reaching out to tuck his hand against your neck.

"I missed you too."

He grins, dipping down to kiss you, sweet, gentle, and soft. Exactly how you deserve to be treated, to be touched, to be loved.

"Good." He scoops you up, and, instinctively, you wrap your legs around his waist. You kiss him back, fingers in his hair. I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you.

"I really missed you, Euijoo," you whisper again, curling a loose strand of hair behind his ear as he walks to your bedroom.

"I really missed you, too, Darling."

you gotta stop buying me things

i like to you like pretty things i see a pretty thing i buy you the pretty thing

at least let me get you something please?

no :)

you are infuriating

This is his favorite part of the day when he's with you. Don't get him wrong, he enjoys the way you taste and sound when he's taking you apart. But this, your head in his lap as you absentmindedly scroll on you phone, is intoxicating. He worries sometimes, how fast everything seems to be moving, how comfortable the two of you have gotten with each other. How fast he has fallen into baser wants, and how easily you seemed to agree with it. But, as Fuma had said on the plane, it's not like he's professing his love, so it's fine. He twirls a lock of hair around his finger, the tv set to a low decibel as the two of you relax.

He watches you scroll past something idly, before you place your phone on your chest.

"You're quiet."

"I'm always quiet," he says in amusement, grabbing your phone off your chest and placing it on the coffee table beside your couch. "What are you thinking about?"

You're quiet for a moment, thinking about something that you clearly have trouble putting the words together. "I…like this," you say slowly, "I think."

"You think?"

You nod, pursing your lips petulantly. "Yeah, I think."

Euijoo shifts, covering your face with the palm of his hand and shaking your head. It's silly, and you giggle trying to push his hand off your face in futility. You grump and groan, but he knows if you wanted him to stop, you would tell him straight.

"You want to know what I think?" He slides his hand down, pressing his thumb against the plush of your lips. "I think that you know you like this. Isn't that right, Darling?"

"Euijoo!"

His thumb dips into the crevice of your mouth, petting your tongue gently, before locking your jaw between his fingers, shaking your head from side to side.

"You're always whining," he says jovially, "Always grumbling, making such cute noises all the time, you know that?" You'd cover your face if his hand wasn't holding your mouth ajar. "It's like you're begging for something to keep that pretty mouth occupied."

He watches the sudden onslaught of arousal takes you over. Your pupils blow out, taking over the color of your iris. You make a small sound, wanton and needy, and he slowly pulls his thumb out of your mouth to grip your jaw.

"Is that what you want?"

You scramble to your knees, a wanting in your gaze as you pull the zipper of his pants down. It's not rushed, but there's a frantic energy to your movements that Euijoo wishes to calm. His hand settles gently on yours, eyes wide and searching as whatever frenetic energy that is humming under your skin soothes. He watches intently, gently running his fingers over the skin of your forearm as you settle. You pluck at his pants with a pout, and he chuckles.

"Color?"

Your eyes roll up as you think, lips pursing before nodding. "Green," you say, waiting for him to move his hands, "very, very green."

My pretty, baby, he thinks, letting you pull him out. He rests his hand on your head, groaning softly as your breath hits his head. Plush lips press delicately against the tip, when you pull back, your lips glisten with precum, tongue darting out to lick them. Euijoo shudders, finger reflexively tightening when you wrap your hand around the base of his dick, leaning back in to press kisses down his shaft. You alternate between soft kisses and kitten licks, causing his hips to jerk.

"Are you teasing me?"

The look you give him is innocent, eyes darkened in lust, eyebrows lifted to give a doe eyed affect. If it wasn't for the way you were fighting a smile, he would've fallen for it.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." You punctuate this by licking his from the base to tip, the heat of your mouth covering his head. He groans, his head falling back on the couch, as you lick his slit. His grip tightens again, this time harsher than before jerking your head back to pull you off.

"You're teasing me." This time it's not a question, and he licks his lip. His throat is dry, but it's there, the dark want of something rougher, something more intense. He wants to watch you swallow around the length of his cock. He wants to use your mouth, bury himself into the wet cavern until he cums down your throat. Euijoo pushes your hands out the way to grip the base of his dick, peering down at you with something harsh but gentle. "Open."

You do, and he taps his cock once, twice, three times against the flat of your tongue, as you brace against his thighs. It's gentle, though the two of you knew that whatever is about to happen will be far from gentle. He proves you right, sliding his dick against your tongues he pushes your head down. Euijoo expects resistance the lower your get, and no matter how rough he wants to be, he also doesn't want to push you too much. But then you look up at him just as he bottoms out, and swallow. He can feel your throat contracting around him, and he moans.

"Fuck." He needs a moment, breathing deeply. You swallow again, and he squeezes his eyes shut. "Fuck, baby. This is what you want?" You whine and he can feel it, pleasure causing his hips to buck and force him impossibly deeper. "So fucking, hah, perfect. My perfect girl."

He uses you then, the hand in your head steadying you as he fucks into your mouth. Your mouth is perfect, hot and wet, your tongue pressing against the underside of his cock with each thrust of his hips. Each time he pulls away you breathe in, each time he pushes back you breathe out, swallowing. "You just, mm, wanted s-something to fill your mouth, huh, darling? Need—fuck, fuck, your mouth feels so good."

He doesn't know how but you somehow swirl your tongue and he shoves your head down even further until your nose presses against the hair there and he hears, and feels, you choke. "Fuck, sorry, baby. Feels—god, keep fucking doing that." He can't even move, he wants to cum, and you're sucking him off so well he's almost frozen in pleasure. If his grip is uncomfortable, you don't do anything to indicate it, moaning around his cock that sends a zing up his spine.

"Jesus—hngh—gonna c-cum, baby." His body tightens as he does, toes curling as you swallow his orgasm down. You swallow twice, letting some cum spill over before slowly pulling off him. Euijoo collapses into your couch, bones liquid as his grip loosens. All he can hear is the sound of your combined panting, and he absentmindedly pets your head as you rest your cheek against his clothed thigh.

It's a full minute or two before he can speak, eyes struggling to open to look at you. When you both make eye contact, he feels a rush of affection, dragging his hand down to touch your cheek.

"C'mere." As you stand, he tucks himself back in his jeans, and then tucks you into his arms, your nose pressed against his neck.

"I take it a did a good job?"

He snorts, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Darling, I'm gonna be honest, I think you sucked the soul out of my dick." You giggle, nuzzling closer to him, and lacing your fingers together.

you want to come over? i've got your favorite snacks

uhhhh i wish my sister is having a crisis rn something about liking her situationship?

…. what's your sisters name again?

we all call her yana why?

baby you will never believe this

Euijoo has said this before, but he really does not like your ex. And, like, yeah, he's thought about it before, but he cannot stress enough how much he does not like that man. He hates the way Takeshi talks to you, talks about you, talks around you. He hates the way he thinks leans in when you're talking like he's free to do so, even when Euijoo is right next to you. He hates that Takeshi thinks he still has access to you.

Case and point: right now.

Euijoo thinks you're too nice. Which is saying something because people think he's too nice sometimes too. But you're letting this (piece of shit, waste of space, should've been a stain on a rag) guy talk to you and laugh with you. The only reason he knows you're uncomfortable is the way you've angled your body just slightly away from the man.

If anyone were ask him, he'd say that he thinks your ex is stalking you, trying to test the stability of your relationship. He keeps trying to poke and prod the foundations, looking for holes to slide himself in and get you again. But, regardless of how kind you are, you're giving him absolutely nothing.

You're sitting pretty in your sundress, and despite his ire at Takeshi having popped up on this outing, Euijoo relishes in any time he gets to spend with you. He's got another flight to Korea in the works to deal with, and he wants to spend as much time with you before he's gone. Following that, he's aware, is the wedding and it's all Euijoo can do not to stress over the fact that whatever happens after the wedding this facade he's grown to enjoy will be no more.

There will be no more excuses to come over, no more reasons to kiss you, touch you or fuck you. Not that the sex was the part he enjoyed the most. (He enjoyed everything that had to do with being in your presence.)

He slides in easily, placing his hand at the small of your back. You jump, startled for a second, twisting to see who touched you. When the two of you make eye contact, you relax, settling into the breadth of his chest. "Euijoo." Your tone has a musical note to it, and he watches as Takeshi tenses.

"Hey, Darling." He presses a kiss to your forehead, taking in the scent of you as he does so. "You didn't wait long, right?"

You hum, shrugging. "I dunno, five minutes is quite a long time to wait," you joke, smiling up at him, and he laughs.

"Oh, is it?" He presses his thumb into the softness of your waist, and you jolt away from him, giggling. "I apologize for having you wait for an eternity, then."

Your ex clears his throat, clearly unhappy with being blatantly ignored. Euijoo sighs, closing his eyes, before looking to his side.

"Takeshi." Nothing more nothing less.

"Euijoo."

Before Euijoo can correct him, you chime: "He really doesn't like when random people call him that. It's EJ." He watches as Takeshi's right eye twitches, and the man take a deep, deep breath. "I'll be right back, I think I see Hana and if I don't greet her she will have a conniption." You run off before he can say anything, but he gets the feeling it's because you know he can handle your ex in a way that you could not. Despite your heartbreak, there is a piece of you who still loves him, who still molds yourself after the way Takeshi likes you.

He watches the way you greet Hana, standing next to Takeshi for a moment despite the mans grumbling. "She really does run off before anyone can finish speaking to her," Takeshi grumbles, crossing his arms. He's prodding at something he hopes is a spot that he can bring back to you, to create wounds that no longer exist. Euijoo can see it now Even that boyfriend of yours doesn't like how you run off, he'd say, but I don't. Not anymore. I've missed it. I've missed you.

Euijoo has never truly felt a way about it because you don't run off with him, unless you're escaping Takeshi, so he shrugs. "I wouldn't know," he says jovially, "she doesn't run off often with me."

Your ex grinds his teeth, fist clenching where it sits tucked between his chest and forearm. He seems to mull something over, turning to look at Euijoo with something close to hate, but not vitriolic enough to be so.

"E…" Takeshi trails off, almost as if he was going to overstep but then corrects himself, "EJ, come on. You know how Starlight can be. She's always running off." The man waves a hand in the air. "Doesn't talk much. Though her voice is…pretty when she does." An innuendo if there was ever one. "I mean, everyone enjoys listening to her when she talks, of course." He's trying to cover it up and it irritates Euijoo to no end.

"She does have a certain air to her when she's speaking," Euijoo agrees, trying to keep his tone light. He doesn't, if the way Takeshi seems to hide a smug grin behind agreement. "She's cute, for sure. But I think I like her the most because of how kind she is. I've never met a person so giving before. Not the way she is." A pause. "I truly feel lucky." Euijoo goes to leave before turning around to look at Takeshi once more. "Thank you, by the way."

The man startles. "For?"

"For keeping her company for the last year and a half." He watches as your ex freezes, caught, and unsure because he wasn't expecting him to say that. "Did you think I didn't know?"

"I didn't…I mean, we had been seeing each other for over three years." Still in this moment Takeshi wants to have the upper hand.

"Oh, I'm aware. When we first started seeing each other she told me about you, and I can't say I cared much at the time, but—" Euijoo shrugs— "when we started to get serious she was going to end it. But at the time I was really busy. Not in the same way I'm busy now, of course, but my job took me back and forth from Korea to Japan more often than not, and you know how she is, my darling needs someone to come home to. She gets…lonely." Euijoo takes a step to Takeshi with a grin that's more akin to baring teeth than a smile. "So, I told her that she should keep seeing you. At least until I'm much more settled, and can be here more often." When Euijoo leans down, it's to demonstrate the sheer difference in the two men. A moment to show you could never be me, Takeshi. "So thank you, really. I would have worried otherwise. It really was the perfect timing when you ended it, she was really stressed trying to figure out how to tell you it was over. I can only hope your future wife is as aware as I was."

Euijoo doesn't give Takeshi a chance to talk, mouth agape as he walks away and tucks you just under his arm and greets Hana.

pretty

shut up

i'm being honest the dress is pretty, too

yk, this is what tf i be talking about you've got everyone fooled but i know the truth

i didn't realize it was a crime to compliment my girlfriend consider me reprimanded won't do it again, darling

i definitely didn't say that you are so aggravating

You're nervous again, fidgeting with the straps of your dress. You're so pretty, Euijoo knows he thinks about you like this often, but good god you're pretty. The cut of the dress sits on your hips, the way the fabric drapes pulls his eyes to the curve of your body, and the color brings out the depth of your skin. He finds you more than pretty, he finds you absolutely enticing, a greek goddess sitting with mere mortals who have forgotten who you were. He wants to drop to his knees and worship the alter between your thighs, showing you how loyal he truly is to you.

He watches as you tuck, untuck, and then tuck again a lock of hair behind your ear, like you can't figure out the best way to present yourself. He presses a kiss against your temple, as more and more people pour into the venue. "Are you okay?"

"I'm," you pause, trying to figure out where your feelings sit, "I don't know. I thought I would still be hurt, but I'm not? No, I'm not hurt, I'm not anything. Nothing, actually." When you look at him this time, it's softer than before, gentle in a way that he only catches glimpses of when you think he's not looking. He can faintly hear the sound of your phone vibrating in your purse, and he watches as you fumble for the zipper before unlocking your phone. Your head tips to the side, eyes narrowing before you scoff. "You have got to be fucking kidding me."

"What's wrong?"

He sees you hesitate, closing your eyes in annoyance and handing him the phone.

come see me i just want to talk to you i love you this is a mistake

Euijoo's vision blacks out for a second, completely missing you waving someone down. His grip tightens on the phone, dragging his gaze from the screen over to you, gesturing as, it looks like, the wedding planner looks at you, a bit scandalized, before pointing down the hallway. She says something to you and you roll your eyes, though he can tell its not in annoyance, but in something else, a mutual understanding as you lean in and say something in her ear. She pats your shoulder, and you smile at the woman brightly.

You gesture to Euijoo, holding your hand out before dragging him along.

"What, uh—"

"You asked me earlier how I felt," you mutter, pulling him through the crowd, down the hallway and to a door, "I'm angry. I'm angry and no one deserves to be married to a piece of shit who lies to them." You stop short, staring at the door, before looking at Euijoo again, and you look scared once more. You take a deep breath, pulling your phone out of his hand with a smile that read more as terrified than confident. He watches your fist hover over the door, and he can't help but press his hand to your lower back.

"You can do this." Whatever the this was. Though, he was sure he could take a guess by your expression. Your chest inflates with a deep breath, holding it for a moment before letting it go.

"Fuck this." When you knock on the door, it takes a second before the bride, pretty in a modern wedding dress, opens the door with wide eyes.

"C-can I help you?"

"Kasumi, right?" It takes her a second to nod, and you tuck some hair behind your ear. You say your name and Euijoo can see a type of vague recognition enter her eyes, like she knows of you, but not why. "We need to talk." She nods, and he squeezes you hand before letting you disappear into the room.

He's not sure how long he stands outside, but he hears a shout of Are you fucking serious? at some point, but it doesn't escalate from there, and you're not getting kicked out, so he can assume everything was going…well (?). When the door finally opens, the bride-to-be is seething in rage, and you shrug with a genuine clueless look of concern.

"I cannot believe that son of a bitch," Kasumi says, eye twitching and regardless of how badly Euijoo has wanted to cold clock Takeshi, he gets the feeling that his (most likely ex-bride-to-be) will be turning him every which way but lose. Her makeup is ruined, tear streaks, and mascara on her cheeks, but she sucks in a deep breath, holding your shoulder. "We should get drinks some time."

You blink once, twice, three times before nodding slowly. "Y-yeah. Yeah, if you'd like." Your voice is soft, and Kasumi looks at Euijoo, looks at you, looks at Euijoo again, and then looks back at you and points. When you nod, she marches up to the man.

"She is a treasure," she says fiercely—

"K-Kasumi!"

"—I know I've only known her for twenty minutes, but you better treat her well or I'll have my dad kill you." She says it so seriously, and so firmly Euijoo has to smother a laugh. "Now, I have to go and cancel this wedding, and maybe kick that piece of shits ass." And like a calm before the storm, Kasumi marches back into her dressing room and shuts the door.

It takes a minute, but you lean against him, sighing softly.

"So—" fingers press against your waist— "productive conversation?"

"Exhausting conversation," you correct, pulling your keys out of your purse, "Can we go home now? I think I want to sleep for 40 days and 40 nights."

He laughs, bending down to lift you up by the bend of your knees. Your little squeak is adorable as you scramble to hold on to his shoulders, and he carries you to the car. Now is the perfect time to say that Euijoo really regrets not having a license, because you look tired and he wishes he could just drive you home. But he can't, so the best he can do is settle you in the car.

When you back out, you look him dead in the eye and say: "It's insane that you don't know how to drive."

"Shut up." Euijoo can feel his cheeks heat, and you throw your head back and cackle. You don't laugh like this very often, though he knows 2 months, despite how natural everything feels, is not a lot of time to truly know someone. But, Euijoo truly thinks he knows you better than he's known anyone else, and he wants to keep getting to know you. He wants to know you down to your very core, which, he hopes he gets to continue to do so.

As soon as the two of you step in the door, you fall into each other. He lifts you, pressing you against the door, and your fingers slip into his hair, tugging gently.

"Bed?"

"Too far—" he peels you off the door and drops to the couch— "here." He unzips your dress, and you lift it over your head, tossing it somewhere. Your hips shift just as Euijoo cups your breast, leaning down to wrap his lips around your nipple. You press down harder, moaning as he nips at the bud, a broken little moan that has him pulling away to kiss you again. Your hands shake as you pull the zipper of his dress pants down, and he grabs your wrists with one hand, lifting you up so that you're hovering over him.

"Euijoo, please?" The way you sound slides heat down his spine and he lets go of your wrists to take his pants off, and slowly unbuttoning his shirt.

"You're so cute," he murmurs, watching you watch him. "So, so cute. My cute baby."

"You're so embarrassing," you grumble, and a breath leaves him in amusement. He pulls you in then, sitting you directly on top of him, trapping himself between the two of you. Without prompting, he pushes your hips back, then forth, the slide of you, hot, wet and wanting enough to have his grip tighten. Your hands scramble for his shoulders, looking for something to hold on to, and he laughs into a moan.

"Pretty thing," he says softly, pushing and pulling you against him. The sounds would be disgusting if he wasn't so turned on by the auditory proof of how much you want him, and his right hand trails from your hips, up, up, up, until he presses his thumb to your nipple.

You jerk in his hold, nails digging into the skin of his shoulder as you follow the rhythm Euijoo has set yourself. You're always so quiet, even when you're in the throes of passion, but the slightest hitch of your breath lets him know how good you feel. He can feel you getting wetter with each glide of your pussy against his cock.

"You're so perfect," he mumbles, mouth drying from the pleasure clouding his mind. You moan out something, but it's completely intelligible, your hips moving faster, resting your forehead against his. Eyelids flutter in the struggle of keeping them open, but you do such a good job, Euijoo coos, letting go of your nipple to fist your hair.

"Look at you," he groans, hot pleasure tugging common sense, "so pretty. So, so pretty. Fuck, keep doing that baby."

You nod, quickening your pace and Euijoo finds himself babbling things he's never once let out of the far recess of his mind. Sweet things at first—"Keep using me like that. So perfect f'me." Then darker wants, things he knows make no sense after only two months, not really, but things he knows he only wants with you, two months be fucking damned.

"Wish I could fuck you properly." Your breath hits his face in short pants the closer the two of you get to cumming. "Fuck, baby. Fuck, I don't want anyone but you." His eyes search yours, hazy in pleasure but cognizant in a way that he knows should scare you, but hopes it doesn't. "Wanna ruin you for other men, wanna cum so deep you're dripping with it."

Your punched out moan is needy, fingers spasming on his shoulder. "Is that what you want baby? You want me to cum inside of you? Want me to fuck a baby inside of you?"

He jerks your head back as your thrusts get sloppier the closer you get, he's holding off his own orgasm through sheer determination alone.

"Euijoo," you chant, your words slurring on the bottom half of his name turning it into an elongated moan. "Gonna cum, gonna cum, gonna cum."

"Cum for me, baby—" he lifts his hips to meet you thrust for thrust until you tense in his hold— "there we—ah—there we go. Fuck." Cum splashes on his stomach in three long spurts that causes his toes to curl, and his grip in your hair to tighten.

For a moment, all the two of you can do is breathe, every breath that leaves you, he takes in, and every breath that leaves him, you inhale. Something settles in this moment, not necessarily a goodbye, but something he knows he will mourn for however long it takes before he can get over it (probably never, he knows). A revelation, an epiphany that can only exist when being with someone feels kismet and yet too early.

You peel your fingers from his shoulders, looking down with a scoff.

"So unfair." You swallow dryly, and Euijoo wants to grab you a glass of water, but he can't because he genuinely feels like he has no bones.

"What?"

"Your waist," you grumble, catching the cum lazily dripping down his skin with your pointer, "'S so tiny." You slip your finger into your mouth, and he feels his dick give a half hearted jump from it. He'd fuck you again if he could, but his recovery time isn't immediate, no matter how turned on he is. Euijoo squints, squeezing your waist.

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious!" You snag your underwear from where they seemed to hang on the edge of the sofa to wipe his cum off his stomach. "You've got like the sluttiest waist I've ever seen on a man."

A bark of laughter escapes him slipping into a moan as you shift on top of him. He brings his hand down to hold you still, eyebrows furrowed when you giggle. His head tips to the side, dragging his gaze to meet yours. "Thank you," a pause, "I think?"

When you try to move again, he hisses out a sharp Stop and you do, though your look of amusement never fades. A breath leaves Euijoo in fond exasperation. "You can be a little bit of a brat."

"I've no idea what you're talking about." You curl into him. "You know how to speak in, like, 3 languages right?"

"Two. Japanese and Korean."

"Okay, so teach me something in Korean."

"Like what?"

"Like, uhm, how to greet someone."

He chuckles, rubbing his thumb against the small of your back as he does so. Your pronunciation is a little clumsy at first, but you get the hang of it, the smile on your face bright, even as you hide it in his shoulder.

"Okay, now tell me something in Korean. Anything you want."

He thinks for a moment, squinting at your ceiling before settling on something. He whispers it in your ear, feeling you shiver at his words.

"What's it mean?"

He hums softly. "It's a secret." I'm going to fall in love with you.

—

We need to talk

"Shit."

Maki turns to look at him, eyebrows raising in confusion. Euijoo runs his hand down his face as the younger man kicks at him.

"What's wrong?"

Euijoo's phone dangles in his hand, and he rolls his head over to Maki with a sigh.

"I'm getting broken up with," he grumbles, tossing the phone on the bed. Maybe if he ignores your text he can prolong it. Maybe he'll be able to find the words to convince you to let him stay for one more minute, one more day or month until eventually you give up. But that wouldn't be healthy, would it?

"Were you two even really together…?" Maki looks as confused as the situation is, and Euijoo lets out a tired laugh, rubbing his eyes.

"Uh, no technically?" Euijoo grimaces. "But also, yes technically."

"Wait." A pause. "Wait, I'm really confused."

Euijoo sighs, rolling so he's laying width wise on Maki's bed. "I was seeing someone to get back at her ex."

"Ah, she got him back?"

"Well, her ex also cheated on her, so that's kind of how it all began."

"So, no she didn't get back with him?" Maki's face twists into something even more confused. "I think I'm more confused than I was before. Start over."

"Uh, okay, uhm." Euijoo's face scrunches up trying to sum everything up. "Met a girl at the club."

"Right."

"She was crying."

"Right."

"Turns out she just got broken up with and found out her boyfriend was also using her to cheat on his fiance and invited her to the wedding."

"Holy shit," Maki says, and Euijoo points nodding.

"Right."

"Okay so I get the technically no part—" the younger of the two nods— "Technically yes?"

"She invited me to a wedding, then that time you caught me on the way out—"

"Oh, that date. That makes sense."

"—and we started, I mean, I." Euijoo clears his throat and Maki's amused expression stretches into a grin.

"Oh. Was this after the date?"

"At the wedding, actually." He flushes, avoiding Maki's gaze.

"At the wedding? Damn, Wiju, you move quick!"

"A-anyways." He claps his hands together. "We went to The Wedding a few weeks ago, so…"

"Oh," his voice turns understanding, "got it." The two of them are quiet for a moment as Maki tries to figure out what to say. Euijoo looks for his jacket in the mean time, movements slow because he wants to push it off for as long as possible. "I don't know them, but I'm sure she wouldn't sleep with you if she didn't like you at least a little?"

Euijoo shakes his head with a small chuckle. "The problem isn't that I don't think she likes me. I know she does. I just…don't want to give it up? I like her."

"God, you and Fuma are…hopeless," Maki says laughing, and Euijoo swats at him with a soft chortle.

"You know about Fuma?"

"I caught him the other day staring at his phone hoping his situationship would text him back," Maki says seriously, "I'm telling you, hopeless."

"You wanna know something that makes it even worse?" Euijoo ties his shoe, sending an omw text when he stands up, "The people we like are sisters."

He watches Maki fucking blue screen at his words, and his head tilts back as he laughs. Just as he closes the door, Maki shouts: Wait, what?

When he eventually makes his way to your place, he hesitates to knock on your door. Just get it over with. Just rip the band-aid off Euijoo, he thinks, it'll be fine. It'll be fine. Everything will be fi—

You open the door, eyes wide and out of breath. "Hi."

"H-hi."

You gesture for him to come in, and he tenses just as the welcoming familiarity of your apartment engulfs him. He's never going to have this again. Is it silly to think he will never have feelings like this for someone again? Maybe. People say all the time you fall in love once, you can fall in love again, but Euijoo knows himself, so it won't matter if he does fall in love again. He will never have this again, and he has to be okay with it. He's not sure he ever will be, to be honest. Euijoo thinks he will always mourn that you were the right person at the wrong time.

"You wanted to t—"

"I really like you," you blurt out, wringing your hands, swallowing thickly, "I really, really like you."

"I like you, too." He reaches out, flipping your hand over to run his finger down your heart line. "I thought you were breaking up with me."

"Oh, I absolutely am breaking up with you," you say, and he feels his heart drop.

Right.

"But I think I owe you something more than just an it's not you, it's me line."

"You don't owe me anything," he says, trying to pull his hand away. You wrap your free hand around his wrist, pulling his hand closer to your chest.

"I do actually," you say, rubbing your thumb over the grooves of his knuckles, "I very much do owe you something. So let me just…get this out before you tell me to fuck off, okay?" You take a deep breath. "I really like you, Euijoo. Like, it's insane how much I like you for it only being two months. But, uhm, I don't think it would be a good idea for me to go from a…a pretty bad relationship to another relationship." You pause, looking past him as you gather your words. "I-I lost myself while I was dating Takeshi. To the point where my family didn't even recognize me, and I cannot even begin to unpack the weird relationship I have with my mom, and me and Yana are just now starting to talk to each other again, like actually talk, and—"

"Breathe, darling."

You suck in a deep breath and offer him an apologetic smile. "Let me start over. Euijoo, I really like you, but I think that before I can get into another serious relationship again, I'm going to need some time with myself. Actually, if I'm going to be completely honest? I need to go to therapy. I need to learn who I am as a person, and I'm realizing I never really did that when I was supposed to. Which is insane because I'm 29, but whatever. And I know this is, like, selfish, and you don't deserve that; you could date anyone you want. You should date anyone you want, especially someone closer to you in age—"

"Darling." He corrects you again, stopping your spiral in it's tracks.

"Sorry."

He gestures for you to finish what you were trying to say. "Ask."

"Okay, uhm." You take a deep breath, tucking your nose against his hand. "I don't want you to wait for me. But if in, let's say—" you look up calculating some numbers in your head— "a year, maybe, if you still have feelings for me, would you like to try this again?" Before he can answer you rush out. "No pressure, by the way. I totally understand if—"

He kisses you, pressing your entwined hands under your chin to tip your head back. It's soft, and sweet, speaking words he could never truly articulate well.

"Okay, I'll wait."

"Euijoo, at least think about it."

"I just did," he says, kissing you again, "I'll wait. I want this." He forces you to look at him then, so you can see how serious he is. "I want you. I want to wait."

"If you're sure."

He makes a face. "I'm pretty sure."

6 Months and 5 Days

Euijoo puts all his effort and energy into his day to day. Variety shows, YouTube shorts, TikTok's fill his schedule. Being an MC for MNET takes chunks of his time, fills his planner, and manages to distract him for hours at time. He does his best not to think about you during the first few months, and fails horrifically. And if he were to be honest? He never truly settles into it.

He wants to text you all the time. Sometimes, he has to turn his phone over because it feels like it's talking to him. Once, Euijoo had to beg Maki to take his phone so he wouldn't cave and reach out to your first. Which, yes, he knows that's a little embarrassing. But he can't be embarrassed if he feels justified. When something particularly interesting happens, he reflexively goes to text you before remembering he can't and it causes a pang of loneliness light his chest up. He's waiting, but whose to say that if you do text him you'll want anything.

Is it embarrassing to say that he'll wait for you forever?

It's when he's scrolling through an old conversation that he gets the notification. The message auto-scrolls down, and Euijoo feels his heart beat in his ass.

I know it can be a bit gimmicky sometimes But the cherry blossom festival is happening and if you want to, I have two tickets

He watches the ellipses pop up for about a minute of two.

i'll be there at 7:30 no pressure!

He flies off the bed to look for something to wear when Fuma walks into the room. He says nothing for a while, watching Euijoo leaf through outfit after outfit before vetoing it.

"What…?"

"I…I—" he wheezes out, before pointing at his phone for Fuma to read.

"Oh, is this?"

"Yes," Euijoo nods, grumbling to himself when he pushes another outfit to the side, "very much yes." When he looks at Fuma it's with anxiety. "I…don't." He can barely put words together, and Fuma tilts his entire body back to check and see if anyone is coming before closing the door.

"Okay." He nods, pushing Euijoo out of the way to help him find an outfit. Almost an hour later, Euijoo is dressed in something he feels comfortable in. Fuma places his hands on his shoulders, squeezing gently.

"Everything will be fine."

"You can do this."

"I can do this," Euijoo repeats, voice breaking over this, and Fuma raises an eyebrow in amusement.

"Say it again."

"I can do this."

"Again."

"I can do this."

"You can do what?"

The two of them jump in surprise, turning to look at the door. Maki's leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed.

"Uhm."

"You can do what?" Maki repeats, squinting at the two of them. Fuma and Euijoo make eye contact before the latter shrugs helplessly.

—

The blossoms sit on your curls delicately as the two of you trek through the venue. It's silent for a while, his fingers twitching in want. The fabric of his jeans are itchy beneath the palm of his hand, wrinkling the denim as he tries to get his head in the game, mouth opening and closing each time he wants to say something. He struggles with it sometimes, the ease the two of you built suddenly much more stilted. You reach out, wrapping your hand around his wrist in the silence.

His shoulders drop in that moment, a breath leaving him as he shifts closer to you.

"I'm glad you came."

The crowds chatter wafts around you the two of you, flowing up and down like the waves of an ocean as day turns to dusk.

"I'm glad I came, too." Whatever thoughts that had been racing in his mind stop with your touch, and the sound of your voice. "You look really good."

"Thank you." Your smile is bright, uncovered unlike how it was before. Way back when, you would have covered it up with a dip of your chin or a hand over your mouth. You seem settled, comfortable in your skin in a way you weren't 6 months ago. A piece of Euijoo mourns the fact that he was not around to watch you make this change, but another part of him is in awe of how much can change and remain the same in such little time. "You look good with the red—orange?— hair, by the way."

Your hand slides into his with a surety that has him blink down at your joined hands. Fingers lace together, and you drag him over to a vendor with a soft Ooh, that looks good. Euijoo is too busy staring at your hand in his to pay attention to what you order and hand him. He wants to, he can't even put the words together, ask you if this means what he thinks it means. He wants to open his chest and hand you his heart on a silver platter so you know it still beats for you. He wants to—

"Euijoo?"

"Sorry." The hanami dango, he finally looked down long enough to see what you handed him, is mildly sweet on his tongue, and it reminds him a bit of you. "Uhm, how's work been?"

You startle, as if suddenly struck with the fact that this is something he might not know, and Euijoo feels good knowing that he can still read you well. "I, uh, I quit, actually," you say, tucking hair behind your ear, "I work somewhere else. It's much better."

"Oh! Uh, c-congratulations."

It's quiet again as Euijoo searches for the words to describe what he's feeling. Happy, for sure. But sad that he wasn't around for it. He watches you look around for something before dragging you to a spot that seems untouched by the many people at the festival. It's hidden just so that it's private, but still connected enough to the event.

"I, uhm—" you close your eyes, taking a deep breath— "I really wanted to text you, but my therapist advised me against it. But I thought about you. A lot. And, I'm not gonna hold you, I thought you wouldn't even come, let alone text me back. Six months is a lot of time to not talk to each other, and I didn't want to assume that you would still want to…see me."

He can tell that whatever you were going to say at the end changed, but Euijoo truly prides himself on still being able to understand all your little idiosyncrasies. So, he takes a step, wrapping his arm around your waist, and lifting your hand to his mouth. He presses a kiss against your knuckles and smiles.

"I think I will always want to…see you," he says, "that won't change. Ever, really."

He watches you smother a smile, your eyes dipping to the floor as you do so.

"Last time we kind of went a little—"

"Fast?"

"Exactly." Your little chuckle is cute, and he pulls you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist. "I just want to move a bit slower?"

"I can do slower," he says, "how slow exactly? Like…can I kiss you?"

Your eyebrows furrow, eyes brightening as you look at him in amusement. "I dunno, I have to think about it."

Euijoo's eyes narrow at your look of mischief, and before you can say anything else, he swoops down and kisses you.

i can't focus

lol

don't laugh it's your fault! what about these pictures are going slow? I think I'm gonna pass out

you are one of the most dramatic men i have ever met

you know other men?

Even being nominated for a Daesang is exciting. Everyone hopes to win at least one, but the nomination is always incredibly steep and Euijoo was well aware of it. So it was safe to say that winning one is…exhilarating. The speech, the performance, hell even the photographs after are a blur to him. He feels…grateful? But impatient because—

Holy shit Holy shit HOLY SHIT EUIJOO HOLY SHIT

—he has someone he wants to celebrate with more than anything.

"Oh, I know that look," Maki says, wiggling his eyebrows, "Euijoo is about to leave us."

His fist presses against the curl of his lips, covering a smile as he slips his phone in his back pocket. Life is easier now that everyone knew about you. Now that he wasn't pretending to be okay with a fake relationship that was turning much too real much too fast, Euijoo gets to have you in a way he didn't before. He gets to talk about you to his members, and have his home screen a picture of your gentle smile on a date. He gets to bring you to Korea and introduce you to his parents (who loved you), and show you all his favorite places, and know that you will always be within arms length for him to reach and love.

He also gets to ditch his members without having to overly explain himself.

"Damn," Nico shakes his head, "you get a girlfriend and we're chopped liver, huh?"

His eye twitches in fond annoyance, checking his watch to see the time. 10 PM, he thinks, nice. Not too late, you won't be tired by the time he gets to the hotel.

"I'm sorry who ditched us last week for a facetime date?"

Nico flushes, grumbling in good nature as the rest of the group erupts in laughter. When the car stops in front of them, Fuma reaches out, stopping Euijoo for a second. He watches as his co-leader search for what exactly he was trying to say before settling on: "Be careful." He shoves Euijoo into the car, slamming the door shut and patting the roof to signify the driver to go.

They both know what Fuma means by be careful, and Euijoo has to stop a chuckle from leaving him. He has no intention on being careful. In fact, he's been thinking about this, about you in ways he feels like it thrums under his skin sometimes. Moving slow meant things were different than before. Moving slow meant not much sex, something you and Euijoo both talked about at length. Something you both agreed to, saying that when the time was right it will happen (though, he must admit, all times feel right in his want).

The car drops him off in front of the hotel you're staying at, and he feels himself start to get tunnel vision. I want you, I want you, I want you, I want you, circles his head over and over again. When he unlocks the door, you're seated comfortably on the bed, ratty sweats, and a shirt you stole from him as your pajamas.

He's never been more attracted to you.

"Euijoo? I thought you were going to celebrate with the rest of your members," you say, watching as he hooks his finger in his tie and loosen it. That goes first, then his suit jacket, then his button up, belt and finally pants. Is it too cocky to admit that he bought lube for this exact occasion? He'd hid it in your suitcase, having watched earlier the way you flushed when you saw it, your eyes darkening in arousal when he had said Just in case.

Just in case indeed.

He says your name then, caressing each syllable, and walks over to you.

"We'll celebrate tomorrow," he murmurs, grabbing your ankle and dragging you to the edge of the bed. Euijoo undresses you slowly, methodical in the way he pulls your sweats off, groaning when he sees you had went without underwear in the comfort of the hotel room. He kneels down, pressing his thumb against your clit, circling it absentmindedly causing your hips to jerk and your mouth to open. "Can I?"

Can I fuck you? Can I love you? Is this okay? Do you want this?

You read him just as well as he's been able to read you, and you nod quickly, tossing your shirt somewhere in the room. "Y-yeah. Yes."

He seals his mouth around your clit, flicking his tongue under the hood with a moan. You taste like his favorite snack. You are his favorite snack. He can stay here forever, swallowing your essence, allowing it to sustain him for years and years. Euijoo doesn't think that there is anything as tasty as you. I want you, I want you, I want you, he thinks, looking up at you as you slide your hand into his hair.

Your moans are a symphony to his ears, thighs tensing each swipe of his tongue.

"That, ah, feels so good," you moan, hips rocking against his tongue, "please don't stop. Please, please don't stop."

Not that he was going to. It's been so long since he's touched you that the swiftness of your approaching orgasm is unsurprising. Doesn't take much, you had said recently, when it's been a while. You gush on his tongue as you cum, and he watches as you tense, orgasm washing over you. It's a little thing, barely anything to take the edge off, but he kisses your thigh, slowly standing up so he hovers over you.

"Color?"

Bleary eyed, and particularly affectionate, you pet at his chest.

"Green," you say, scooting back with his movements, "Very Green. Bright fluorescent green. I've never been greener in my life."

He lifts your legs up, up, up expecting resistance and getting none. His breath leaves him in want and you giggle, shifting side to side so that your legs rest comfortably on his shoulders.

"That's ridiculous," he mutters, gripping your thighs tightly, trying to control himself.

"I'm flexible."

I can see that, he thinks, reaching over to grab the bottle of lube. The cap opens with an audible pop! squeezing the lube onto his hands to wrap his hand around his dick. He pumps himself once, twice, three times, guiding himself to your entrance and shuddering. You're warm and wet, and if he wasn't aware how slowly he needed to go, Euijoo would bully his way in to feel your cunt wrap around him.

He begins rubbing your clit again, slowly pushing past the ring of muscle. Your hand shoots up, gripping his bicep in slight discomfort, and he coos softly. "It's okay, just breathe, darling. Just breathe."

Your chest expands, following his breathing and he inches deeper and deeper with each breath. Your whimper is pained, eyes squeezing shut just as he bottoms out, but he's happy he had the wherewithal to bring lube, remembering the conversation you two had 7 months ago. He keeps rubbing your clit, walls pulsating around his dick with each pass over your bundle of nerves.

He watches as your shoulder loosen, hips twitching, moans shifting from slight pain to pleasure. "Fuck Euijoo," you groan, nails digging into his biceps. Your pussy flutters around him faster and faster and he laughs, just a little, and you whine. "Euijoo, god, fuck—I can't?"

He ignores you, fascinated by the way your stomach jumps, and tightens the closer you get. "Pretty." It feels good, the way your cunt spasms around his dick, so good, in fact, that he feels himself somehow grow harder. "Just give me one more, pretty baby. One more and I'll fuck you nice and good."

Your toes curls, thighs tensing as you cum around him, damn there pushing his dick out from how tight you seem to get. He shuffles closer, hips flushed against yours, watching as you turn your head into the pillow, eyes scrunching shut. Euijoo gives you no time to recover, pulling back and thrusting, first shallowly, then harder.

"You look so pretty when you cum," he murmurs, folding you in half, your knees to your ears and the whimper you let out sounds like fucking sin. Your hands press against his chest trying to push him away with the little strength you have left.

"W-wait! Wai—fuck."

"Wait?" He laughs, a little enamored, but very mean. as he fucks into you, the movement of his hips hard and sure. "You want me to wait, darling?"

You can't say anything, hands shaking as you struggle to find purchase on his shoulders, nails dragging down the length of his back. Skin slaps against skin in rhythmic movement, an erotic song of filth.

"I asked you a question, baby," he coos, foreheads pressed against each other. "Do you want me to, ah, wait?"

Your eyes are barely open, and he taps your cheek firmly. A gasp echoes in the room, and you clench so tightly, he has to bully his way deeper into you. When Euijoo looks down he sees the press of him in your belly and groans. With effort, he moves your hand to press against the print, and your fingers twitch. He gives you no respite, fucking you harder his name leaving you in hoarse whispers, the tail-end of his name a song.

"No, you don't want me to stop," he moans, cupping your breast in the palm of his hand, "you want me to keep going, don't you?" You nod, helpless to his movement. You can't meet him thrust for thrust with your legs by your head, left to the mercy of pleasure.

Euijoo could stop right now, but he won't. He doesn't want to. He wants to fuck you into tears, and he says as much, watching the way your face scrunches in pleasure, overwhelmed and overstimulated from being fucked through an orgasm. When you cum again it's with a sharp whine, one of your hands covering your face.

"Oh darling—" he pulls your hand away— "don't hide. Let me see you." You do, tears running down your cheeks from pleasure, and he licks the salty tracks up as you whine.

"T-too much. Euijoo too much-ah."

His eyebrows furrow, his hand pulling away from your breast, curling under your legs to grip your shoulders from behind. It pushes him impossibly deep, folds you up so much more, and you sob. He doesn't slow as he asks you the color, so sure is he that you don't want him to stop.

He's right, of course, your voice breaking as you say Green, half moan, half cry.

"Gonna cum deep inside," he moans, "gonna make these heavy with milk." Your pussy gives a pitiful clench, wet hot heat with your clit rubbing against the heat of his stomach where he's pressed against you. His thrusts are shallow but deep, puffs of breath mingling, as he fucks you to another sharp orgasm. "You want that, huh? Yeah, you want me to fuck a baby in you don't you?"

Your eyes roll to the back of your head, mouth dropping open in a silent scream. He talks you through it, feeling his own orgasm creep up his spine. "Gonna make sure it t-takes, darling. God." He cums sharp, hard and intense, his vision blacking out as his thrusts become sloppy. But he makes good on his promise, making sure you take ever single drop of his orgasm before he loses all strength and collapses on top of you.

After a while, he kisses your forehead and starts the bath. You grumble, even as he picks you up, depositing you in the bath and sliding behind you.

"Think my ass hurts," you gripe, voice hoarse causing him to snort.

"My poor baby." The skin of your shoulder is soft against his lips as he kisses it, and you elbow him half-heartedly. "What?"

Euijoo's laughs in amusement, adjusting with you as you press your back into his chest. He can't see your expression, but he's well aware you've pursed your lips in annoyance. He trails kisses up the expanse of your shoulder to the curve of your neck that has a content sigh escaping you.

"You're annoying is what," you say, head leaning back to get more comfortable.

"Mm, maybe," he hums in thought, running his hand across the softness of your stomach under the warm water. "But you like it."

"Against my better judgment." You tip your head to the side, reaching up with pruny hands to kiss him. Euijoo returns the kiss with fervor, feeling himself harden from the way your tongue runs against his bottom lip. He opens his mouth, pressing his tongue against yours, hand tracing the silky smooth of your skin to hold your breast again. You pull back with a gasp, eyes closed, tongue sliding against your lip to pull it between your teeth. "I'm too sore to even try to have sex right now."

His laugh is more a breath of air than anything else, eyes closing in his amusement as he shakes his head. "My apologies. I should have been more gentle."

"Nobody said any of that," you sound aghast, turning to be able to look at him better. Euijoo leans down, nuzzling your noses together, eyes darkening. "I just said I'm too sore to have sex right now."

"You liked it then?" Maybe you two should have talked about this before, but Euijoo was too focused on other things to think about checking in ahead of time. The tips of your ears darken, and you hide your face. Usually, Euijoo would pull your face out of your hands and make you meet his gaze, but he's feeling nice so he lets it be.

"Yeah," you mumble shyly, "I liked it. 'S not like I didn't expect it from you, anyways."

"Rude!"

"True," you say back with a soft laugh, "I told you, I know you. You may have everyone else fooled, but not me. I see you."

Your words cover him him with understanding, the terrifying feeling of being seen for who he truly is, and Euijoo gets shy, gaze averting to the ceiling of the bathroom. In the silence, you shift to rest against him again, back against his chest, water and bubbles rippling with your movements before you settle.

Much later, when the two of you have tucked in for the night, Euijoo pulls you closer so that neither of you can see where you end and he begins.

"I see you, too," he whispers in the dark, and you make a soft, sleepy noise that he reads as you agreeing with his words. A nebula of emotions fill his chest, something that reads as love, want, and everything in between. In your slow drift to sleep, you press your face deeper into his chest, and he kisses the top of your head.

I love you, I love you, I love you, he thinks. Euijoo has always been particularly good at knowing what he wants and working for it. He doesn't have to think about wanting you, it's embedded in his very being, the birth of a star that needed the right conditions and got it. When he talks to Nico tomorrow he has to ask him a good place to buy a ring.

He's pretty sure about you.

tag list: @kjjupilled @itzhbu @eiffeltowerdaydream @inlovew-themoon uh if i forgot anyone idk im at work yall

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