Stranger Things
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NASA
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Discoholic 🪩
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Not today Justin
YOU ARE THE REASON
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Cosmic Funnies
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Misplaced Lens Cap
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation
occasionally subtle
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@gingervitiss-blog1
“I got a part time job at a candle shop, and I love it but I have so many candles now, do you want one?”
“Uh, sure. Hey, how many days straight do you think you’d have to spend in a candle shop before your nose stops working? I always wondered about that.”
“What? No, no. Wait. You’ll have my full attention in a moment, just… Wait.”
“Are you sure? Cause I can come back later. I’m sure you’ll still be here.”
“Do you think that if you were falling in space… that you would slow down after a while, or go faster and faster?”
“I don’t think you can fall in space. You’d just float around..”
“Or just crooked. Besides, you’d probably die if you took that much. Not that that would be the worst way to go..”
“Not after that ass flash, I bet. That homophobic twat’ll be doing the five finger shuffle ‘til his skin’s raw,” she snorted. “Can I buy you a celebratory drink?”
“You do go to college, don’t you? There are hot guys for miles, in every direction you look. Why not the guy in your lecture? I can’t imagine he’d turn you down,” she added, pointedly staring at the beautiful girl in front of her.
“Oh. You know those are so much worse for you, though?”
While the pair made their way over to the bar top, Ginger decided the subject wasn’t yet ripe to fall. “Maybe I’m much more calculated. I don’t settle for cheap thrills like ass-grabbing, I go for the guarantee. Namely roofies, but.. I suppose I’ve already said too much.”
“Great place to be grading papers,” she grumbled under her breath, glaring at the man out of the corner of her eye. The shutter on her camera clicked twice and then she was sliding the thing back into her pocket. “Thanks for your compliance.”
“I wouldn’t dare put it past you,” she smirked, holding her hands up in surrender. “Do you think he’s seen Shame? Have you seen Shame?”
“Well, do you smoke at all?”
“What makes you so sure I’m not a perv?” she challenged, puckering her lips at him. “Let’s do Patron. If I’m gettin’ good and fucked up, I’d like to do it without feeling like I’m gonna puke for the next two hours.”
“You don’t think so? But what if it was, like, dab smoke?”
“Vodka cranberry?” she answered with a smile, sliding onto the stool beside him. “Yeah, I think what my parents wanted was a dog, but they accidentally ended up with a real baby instead. It was a shotgun wedding. You can call me Gigi if you want.”
“No, no, no. Here--let me walk you through it: My boyfriend went to the store and bought the Cheetos then ate, like, three of them before walking out the door, and I went on a mission trip to Ethiopia in high school which means I feel extra bad about throwing food away, so I had to eat the rest of the bag. The cat thing was just an experiment for fun.”
“Which part?”
“So how do you know he even has a dick big enough to split you in half? Haven’t you heard what they say about expectations?”
